Paying through the spout

← Your are welcome to our home I don’t remember signing any bond/contract regarding your use of exclamation points!!!!! →

May 25th, 2009 · 191 comments

Our anonymous submitter in Ontario, Canada found this note in the office lunch area. Apparently, the water in the office cooler had been going like crazy until the new pay-per-sip policy was enacted.

“While people were willing to pay,” our submitter says, “whoever was changing the bottles was not doing it as often as before the charges began, and we were all getting annoyed as the cooler was empty more often than not. The sign also kept disappearing. This new sign was put up earlier this week, and the post-it appeared a few days later.”

(I’m still hung up on “people were willing to pay.” I mean, yes, we’re in the middle of a recession. And yes, it’s Canadian funny money. Still.)

FILED UNDER: money · office · office cop · Ontario · water

191 responses so far ↓

#1 mamason

You’re damn right I’m not changing the bottle if I have to pay for the water too!

May 25, 2009 at 11:02 pm rating: 15

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#2 Gladiator763

Looks like a sticking-it-to-the-man WIN here. AND it’s technically within the purview of the payment request to boot.

May 25, 2009 at 11:03 pm rating: 2

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#3 SuperMe

how much do i get paid to change the bottles out?

May 25, 2009 at 11:05 pm rating: 6

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#4 SuperMe

someone should set up a rival water cooler at only 5 cents. don’t let the man have the monopoly on water!

May 25, 2009 at 11:06 pm rating: 78

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- #4.1 Beanster
  
  oh, but he already has the monopoly. he got i by using all of his monopoly money we like to call “Canadian Currency”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:28 am rating: 10
- #4.2 mac
  
  haha. you know, im pretty sure no one has ever tried to pawn off a 5 on me and say its a 20. our money is coloured, but then again, we never have to check our change to see if the green bill they gave us is the right green bill, instead of one of the other green bills that is much smaller than the green bill we were supposed to get.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:42 pm rating: 13
- #4.3 Mishee™
  
  mac, the real question still needs to be asked:
  
  “Are you blind?”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:49 pm rating: 8
- #4.4 Izzie
  
  The money here in the uk is the same colour and only slightly different sizes, yet funnily enough i still manage to see the large number on each note…
  
  Jun 14, 2009 at 1:18 pm rating: 1
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#5 stickman

It is hard to tell the “amount taken” because I just drink right from the spout. How much do I owe? I usually drink just for a minute. BTW, I wear pink lipstick.

May 25, 2009 at 11:11 pm rating: 60

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- #5.1 park rose
  
  That’s called paying lip service to the whole idea.
  
  May 25, 2009 at 11:56 pm rating: 13
- #5.2 Clumber
  
  what is it that the kids used to be sayin’??
  
  ooohhhh SNAP ! or something like that??
  
  Whatever – Rose gets a thumb.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 7:24 pm rating: 2
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#6 Nylund

My Canadian girlfriend gets very annoyed when Americans think Ontario is a city. I tell her, “its because we always read things that say, ” so-and-so, from Ontario, Canada…” The syntax of the sentence makes it sound like Ontario is the name of a city.

And the Canadian Funny Money comment is dead on. cf: their quarters with stick figures:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/59/228843081_a9632966fe_b.jpg

May 25, 2009 at 11:20 pm rating: 11

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- #6.1 Beanster
  
  every month in 1999 we had a different specialty quarter, one from each province and territory. the designs were chosen to represent as much of canada as possible. as canada has children (that we like) and this one was submitted by a child i think it is lovely. it was my favourite! it says “we love kids and each other in a totally non-sexual way”
  
  May 25, 2009 at 11:37 pm rating: 51
- #6.2 Lorelie
  
  You make my head hurt.
  
  *wanders off in search of coffee*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:57 am rating: 7
- #6.3 crackjob
  
  I suppose I get it if the average American reader can’t name the Canadian states – (which we insist on quaintly referring to as “provinces and territories”). But I would hope that most people can recognize Canada as a country.
  
  With this in mind, “Ontario, Canada” is just like saying “Illinois, USA.” You wouldn’t mistake “Illinois” for a city, would you?
  
  Canadian geographic taxonomy is no different than that in the US.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:13 pm rating: 15
- #6.4 mamason
  
  Well of course we wouldn’t say Illinois, USA because that would be retarded since Illinois is in France. duh!
  
  And we all know that Canadia is a country in the North Pole surrounded by the antarticulate circle and home to many penguins.
  And I want to know, how many Canadians can name at least 50 of our united states. Seriously… anyone? I have a test tomorrow.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:26 pm rating: 21
- #6.5 Junebug
  
  If you all love each other in a non-sexual way where do all the Canadian children come from?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:29 pm rating: 28
- #6.6 Beanster
  
  we all love each other in a sexual way also. we are complex beings.
  
  @mama – we have 13, you have 50, and i can name all 50. (well usually i get to 46 and forget which ones i’ve already said, but i do know them all)
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:33 pm rating: 8
- #6.7 mamason
  
  Only 12? Once again, canadians taking the easy route, ay.
  
  Hey… btw, does anyone know if a passport is needed to enter Canada from the States?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:34 pm rating: 2
- #6.8 Beanster
  
  actually, the common belief held here is that babies come from Canada Geese, which are not very good at their job. This is why our population density is so low.
  
  actually 13 mama. sorry for the typo. and as of June first, you DO need a passport. Although some states offer “enhanced licenses” which will also get you through. (it’s mostly the states that cares though. Canada wants everyone to come and visit, no matter how clouded with smuggling or how many classes on small electronics you took at the community college.)
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:37 pm rating: 13
- #6.9 ClearlyDemented
  
  You call them Canadian Geese in Canadia? Hmmmm……
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:45 pm rating: 4
- #6.10 Beanster
  
  no… Canada Geese. just like i called them right up there. /\
  
  didn’t change in the last 11 minutes. if you are interested in changing it though, please submit a petition and we will be sure to read it over with interest and then discard it.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:48 pm rating: 12
- #6.11 ClearlyDemented
  
  Sorry, I thought that was a typo. But now that I know, I think that makes it worse. I may just start that petition. Eh, who am I kidding? Like most America people, I’ll probably just act like I’m going to do it, but will be far too lazy to carry it through.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:01 pm rating: 5
- #6.12 Geek Goddess
  
  You are more likely to need the passport to get BACK than to need it to get into Canada.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:00 pm rating: 5
- #6.13 Mishee™
  
  re 6.9 – Just like in Brazil, they just call them nuts.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:17 pm rating: 1
- #6.14 GhostWriter
  
  In Turkey, do they just call it a roast sandwich?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:31 pm rating: 2
- #6.15 a non-eMuss
  
  Yes, and since the invention of sliced bread and roasting, Turkey’s land mass has been rapidly decreasing
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:37 pm rating: 2
- #6.16 Mike
  
  I gots me the CANPASS air so I can visit the land of funny money and geese without waiting in long lines at that ther airport.
  
  There is a city called Ontario in California, so maybe that is why articles will say Ontario, Canada. But still, some of us do know the difference between Windsor, Toronto, Hamilton, Mississauga, Ottawa, etc.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:02 pm rating: 2
- #6.17 Clumber
  
  going waaaay back to 6.4 I have doubts that even 50% of Americans can name the 50 US states.
  
  I have nothing bad to say about ~~america’s hat~~ our ♥northerly neighbors.♥ After all, they let me pick up 222′s !
  
  May 26, 2009 at 7:32 pm rating: 7
- #6.18 Canthz_B
  
  Beanster, it’s easier to recite all 50 if you do it in alphabetical order. That way you can’t repeat any.
  I learned a song in 5th grade called “Fifty, Nifty United States”, and can do all 50 with ease to this day.
  
  I guess you could Google it.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 7:46 pm rating: 3
- #6.19 Canuck
  
  You know why that is? Because Americans never say (or write) “Toronto, Ontario” which is how we would say it in Canada. Just like Americans say “Detroit, Michigan”. Americans ALWAYS say “Ontario, Canada” as if that should pretty much pinpoint the location.
  
  I’m guessing that the initial statement about “funny money” was meant to be passive-aggressive and therefore ironic?
  
  It’s killing me, the amount of ignorance just in the comments of this post. Canadia? Seriously? *laughing* But I digress. I’m sure there will be plenty more where all of this came from, so I shall continue reading and enjoy the rest.
  
  Have a spectacular night!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:02 pm rating: 4
- #6.20 Canthz_B
  
  Canuck,
  
  Americans rarely discuss Canada at all, if you want the truth. LOL
  
  (The “Canadia” comments were jokes, BTW.)
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:14 pm rating: 12
- #6.21 raiseyourglass
  
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3DYbE44OIE
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:17 pm rating: 1
- #6.22 tinkerbell2
  
  Je-SUS, Canuck. Way to disprove the old ‘Canadians have no sense of humour’ theory.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 7:50 am rating: 4
- #6.23 anglophile
  
  I learned with that song, too, CB!
  
  ♪ Fifty, nifty United States; from the thirteen original colonies ♬
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:18 am rating: 1
- #6.24 Beanster
  
  @ Mike (and all other interested parties) we also have a London, Paris, Cambridge, York and while we used to have a Berlin, WWII era Canadians thought it was in their best interest to change it to Waterloo
  
  @ tinkerbell. Im freaking hysterical.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:29 am rating: 1
- #6.25 mamason
  
  I have to believe that Canuck is joking. He has to be, right? No one is that stupid. Not even someone from Canadia.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:56 am rating: 2
- #6.26 Mishee™
  
  I think it was Robin Williams who put it best:
  
  “Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party…”
  
  (my reference is at 5:53, but the total Canada fun starts at about 5:38)
  
  May 27, 2009 at 11:19 am rating: 1
- #6.27 Diane
  
  Mike @ 6.16. Everyone can pass air. I believe most of it is either hot or stinky, depending on which end it originates from.
  
  May 28, 2009 at 1:21 pm rating: 1
- #6.28 Lerren
  
  For the interested parties: As of June 1, you will require a Passport to enter Canada.
  
  May 28, 2009 at 11:35 pm rating: 0
- #6.29 Canthz_B
  
  Anglophile, here’s a childhood memory for you then!
  
  I learned it as “…one by one ’til you’ve given a name to every State in the USA”, but this version says “…day to every State…”, which sounds kind of silly to me.
  We’d be singing for nearly two months if we did that!! LOL
  
  May 31, 2009 at 4:56 am rating: 0
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#7 Olivia

Can I pay in Schrute Bucks or Stanley Nickels?

May 25, 2009 at 11:23 pm rating: 18

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- #7.1 fluffy8u
  
  What about paying in hockey lessons? Is that okay? ‘Cause, blame it on the recession, but I’s a little broke (if ya’ know what I mean!)
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:33 am rating: 2
- #7.2 crackjob
  
  Was… that supposed to be a Canadian accent?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:58 am rating: 4
- #7.3 fluffy8u
  
  Um… no. If it was Canadian I’d say “aboot” and “eh?”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:09 pm rating: 2
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#8 Beanster

1. I am very confused. is the payment sign PA? is the sticky PA?

2. Honestly, “Ontario, Canada,” we have more fresh water here than… well than anywhere else. go drink from the lake. oh ya. the steel companies and ford plant are on the lake. whatever. go drink from the other lake. it’s totally free.

3. our money is pretty.

4. do americans really not know where ontario is? and even if they don’t know geographically, they must know it’s in canada right?

May 25, 2009 at 11:35 pm rating: 21

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- #8.1 mamason
  
  Where’s Canada? Is it in Canadia?
  
  May 25, 2009 at 11:45 pm rating: 20
- #8.2 L. H.
  
  I consider myself to be a well-educated American. If somebody implied that Ontario was a city and not a province, I wouldn’t notice. Perhaps the reason it’s listed as Ontario, Canada is that there is a city called Ontario in LA County, California. It’s not a major city but its proximity to LA means it gets referred to somewhat frequently. That and the fact that Mag-Lites are made there.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:18 am rating: 4
- #8.3 Beanster
  
  would “toronto, ontario” in similar format to “austin, texas” be tough to grasp? would readers lose all sense of context? if so, we are happy to be labeled as one mass of people spread across more than a million square kilometres without municipal separation or distinction to make life easier.
  
  we are eager to please.
  sorry for the confusion.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:14 am rating: 21
- #8.4 fluffy8u
  
  Hey, hey! Ontario, does have it’s own airport, thankyouverymuch. And along with the smell of cows, there is a trucker stop. Does where ever you live have a trucker stop?
  
  Wait… smelly guys who don’t take showers for weeks on end…. okay, we can omit it from the map.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:16 pm rating: 1
- #8.5 Tmarie
  
  I don’t know why but “trucker stop” has a dirtier connotation for me than “truck stop”.
  
  I imagine all kinds of lewd things going on at a “trucker stop”.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:13 pm rating: 1
- #8.6 fluffy8u
  
  Hmm. Well, Fortunately for you, what you imagine is pretty much what goes on. Plus beer.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:49 pm rating: 2
- #8.7 racerx2233
  
  what in tarnation is a kilometer?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:30 pm rating: 1
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#9 mamason

“Cost $ 0.26/IL”

Why are they quoting water prices from Illinois?

May 25, 2009 at 11:52 pm rating: 31

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- #9.1 fluffy8u
  
  Huh… I thought it stood for Investment League.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:41 am rating: 2
- #9.2 Scranton
  
  It’s per one liter. I know the metric system is difficult for you yanks to follow…
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:28 am rating: 6
- #9.3 oi!
  
  nu ahn, we do understand metric system if it is written correctly. When you include / in cost that means it’s per Liter already. no need to add I for one. that’s just redundant and confusing because there is no space between them and I is letter not the number.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:41 am rating: 9
- #9.4 mamason
  
  It was a joke. Why do foreigners always assume that we “yanks” don’t “get” the metric system?
  
  The metric system uses a single unit for any physical quantity thereby eliminating the need for conversion factors when making calculations with physical quantities. All lengths and distances, for example, are measured in metres, or thousandths of a metre (millimetres), or thousands of metres (kilometre), and so on. There is no profusion of different units with different conversion factors, such as inches, feet, yards, fathoms, rods, chains, furlongs, miles, nautical miles, leagues, etc. Multiples and submultiples are related to the fundamental unit by factors of powers of ten, so that one can convert by simply moving the decimal place: 1.234 metres is 1234 millimetres, 0.001234 kilometres, etc.
  
  It’s basically, Measuring for Dummies.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:54 am rating: 23
- #9.5 Mark
  
  My car gets forty rods to the hogshead and that’s the way I likes it!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:00 pm rating: 40
- #9.6 mamason
  
  uh-huh uh-huh
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:07 pm rating: 4
- #9.7 fluffy8u
  
  Wait, the metric system? Isn’t that that thing that the rest of the world uses?
  
  The metric system is the work of the devil.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:24 pm rating: 1
- #9.8 oi!
  
  It’s basically, Measuring for Dummies.
  FTW
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:35 pm rating: 2
- #9.9 Eric
  
  The metric system is what over half the nuts and bolts on “American” cars are measured by.
  Am I the only one that has to use the 15mm socket when changing the oil and a 9/16″ socket when changing the alternator on a Ford?
  I’m still searching for the fine print in my manual that says “Made in Canada, Singapore, Malaysia, Bangladesh and Djibouti; Assembled in Mexico.”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 5:25 pm rating: 2
- #9.10 Canuck
  
  Thanks for not disappointing!
  
  Are you people high? That’s not the letter “I”. It can’t even be mistaken for the letter “I” because there are no cross-bar things across the top and bottom.
  
  It’s not redundant because there are plenty of idiots who would think that the note meant the entire thing was just 1L and cost pennies. Obviously there is more than just 1L in that container. And I think, really, if you are going to take the time to put a sticky note up to anonymously proclaim your dissatisfaction with paying a quarter for a sip of water, you might want to make yourself clear… even to the morons! *LOL*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:09 pm rating: 1
- #9.11 mamason
  
  Miiiiisheeeee! Canuck wants to know if we’re high! He also points out that it couldn’t possibly be an “I” because of the lack of “cross-bar things”.
  
  Do you mind letting him know what we do here? I mean, he asked if we are high.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:21 pm rating: 8
- #9.12 oi!
  
  “It’s not redundant because there are plenty of IDIOTS who would think that the note meant the entire thing was just 1L and cost pennies.”
  
  “you might want to make yourself clear… even to the MORONS! ”
  
  I rest my case.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:24 pm rating: 4
- #9.13 Canthz_B
  
  Canuck, how many fonts do you have on your computer?
  Do they all have “crossbar things” on capital letter ‘I’?
  
  In fact, I maintain (for the purposes of this joke only), that it is an ‘I’ because ones have a little line at the top and a horizontal foot.
  Indeed, I’ve seen medical bills from Canada upon which the numeral “1″ was written in the European style, with a top slash and no foot.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:42 pm rating: 6
- #9.14 racerx2233
  
  metric what?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:33 pm rating: 1
- #9.15 oi
  
  @ 9.10, since we are going all technical here then what about bottom crossbar and small slant bar at the top of number 1?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 12:01 am rating: 1
- #9.16 Canthz_B
  
  With 9.13 I kind of got there, oi.
  
  No response to us MORONS about it from Canuck, though…I must have disappointed!
  
  What a piece of work, that one.
  
  Of course, what could an ignorant American know?
  
  I’ve seen that style I mentioned (top slash, no foot) of “1″ on claims submitted from all over the world, so I really shouldn’t have called it “European-style”. It’s probably more a global-style. We just don’t do it here in the US.
  Just like our government tried to go metric in the early/middle 1970′s and the public refused.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 1:34 am rating: 2
- #9.17 oi
  
  I guess I should read ALL comments before posting mine.
  naaah! Just kidding.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 6:12 pm rating: 0
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#10 Buzz

@mamason: Our bottled water is $6 per 5-gallon bottle which comes to 32¢/liter.

May 25, 2009 at 11:58 pm rating: 2

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- #10.1 mamason
  
  Is this in Canadia or Illinois?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:09 am rating: 3
- #10.2 Buzz
  
  California
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:30 am rating: 3
- #10.3 Canthz_B
  
  Wow, I pay $1.25 for a 5 gallon fill-up in Arizona.
  You guys must have some “high quality H-2-O”!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:48 am rating: 6
- #10.4 Amanda
  
  Where the crap do you live in California that you pay 6 bucks for 5 gallons of water. I live in San Diego which houses some of the MOST overpriced crap in California and I’ve never paid more than $1.25 for a 5 gallon fill up…
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:18 am rating: 4
- #10.5 fluffy8u
  
  Wow, Buzz. I think you’re the one paying up the spout. (Thank you, Kerry!) I know a shop in So. Cal. that will give me three 5 gallon bottles for $3. The key is to go to those hole in the wall places where they have the TV set to Spanish soap operas. They’re in the little strip malls that always seem to have an Eastern bakery and at least 2 Korean named places.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:54 am rating: 4
- #10.6 BrookeDiz
  
  Canthz B,
  
  “Wow, I pay $1.25 for a 5 gallon fill-up in Arizona.”
  
  Who are you trying to kid? Everyone knows there’s no water in Arizona.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:24 am rating: 23
- #10.7 mamason
  
  Amanda,
  
  Where the crap do you live in the world where anyone actually says, “where the crap…”?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:29 am rating: 3
- #10.8 Gina
  
  You guys are all suckers. I get my 5 gallon fill up at the canal for FREE. The algae is lagniappe.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:14 am rating: 8
- #10.9 Wade
  
  Gina, where do you think the bottled water comes from?
  
  Remember… Evian spelled backwards is Naive.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:31 am rating: 9
- #10.10 Mishee™
  
  fluffy, I hear that…
  
  The place around the corner is not only a water store with the spanish TV playing, but it is ALSO a video store…
  
  Talk about multi tasking!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:42 am rating: 4
- #10.11 Geek Goddess
  
  I don’t buy water. I just go lay on my back outside on the sidewalk with my mouth open until enough rain falls to quench my thirst.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:04 pm rating: 3
- #10.12 fluffy8u
  
  Never mind. Wasn’t funny.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:21 pm rating: 1
- #10.13 mamason
  
  I thought it was very amusing, fluffy.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:28 pm rating: 0
- #10.14 fluffy8u
  
  No, what I was going to post wasn’t funny. Something like “GG, where the crap do you live that water falls from the sky?”
  
  Being an LA person, I don’t know what rain is.
  
  See? Told you it wasn’t funny. But thank you.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:07 pm rating: 1
- #10.15 mamason
  
  I stand corrected.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:21 pm rating: 1
- #10.16 Canthz_B
  
  Water from the sky?
  
  I thought that was an urban legend!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:36 pm rating: 1
- #10.17 Geek Goddesss
  
  fluffy, as one who lives where water falls from the sky regularly, I can assure that it is, indeed, not funny. At all. Although the 9 hot sunny days we get here each year leave me laying on the sidewalk completely dehydrated, and waiting.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 2:31 am rating: 2
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#11 Geek Goddess

Canadian money is certainly funny when you are laughing all the way to the bank with loads and loads of it.*

*I find the brown ones attractive myself

http://www.sessionmagazine.com/the-color-of-money-from-around-the-world/

May 26, 2009 at 12:01 am rating: 5

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- #11.1 lilmegzk
  
  yea you know what’s even funnier American money that all looks exactly the same, no wait that’s just boring.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:31 am rating: 6
- #11.2 Gina
  
  Yeah, the green paper, silver coins and copper coins all look the fuck the same. Whatever.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:17 am rating: 15
- #11.3 Mishee™
  
  Gina, chill out.
  
  Our paper money does look and feel all the same!
  
  Geez.
  
  Imagine being a blind person trying to figure out the difference between a $5 and a $50.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:40 am rating: 16
- #11.4 GhostWriter
  
  My beef with coins is solely focused on the nickel. What is his deal? First Jefferson is gone, and a buffalo shows up and now sometimes it looks like Jefferson has run off, and is peeking back at us.
  …and why are they stamping Confederate flags on the back of some nickels? That’s just wrong.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:52 am rating: 6
- #11.5 Geek Goddess
  
  *reaches over to feel Mishee™’s money*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:05 pm rating: 2
- #11.6 nikki
  
  I did appreciate noting that the Canadian $5 bill has hockey on the back of it.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:20 pm rating: 2
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#12 Gretal

If I am taking less than a liter, than I am leaving less than 25 cents. Maybe they need to keep a set up measuring cups with a monetary amount on each. Or set up a coin-operating system that dispenses 500 mL of water when 13 cents is deposited. Arrgh.

May 26, 2009 at 12:26 am rating: 5

reply to this comment
#13 Marklar

Marklar!

May 26, 2009 at 12:34 am rating: 6

reply to this comment
- #13.1 Canthz_B
  
  Polar!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:01 am rating: 10
- #13.2 mamason
  
  Pabular!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:08 am rating: 2
- #13.3 fluffy8u
  
  Taco!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 1:58 am rating: 2
- #13.4 mamason
  
  No, fluffy! It has to end in “lar”.
  
  Uvular!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:16 am rating: 4
- #13.5 Gina
  
  Tacolar!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:18 am rating: 8
- #13.6 Geek Goddesss
  
  Tubular!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:37 am rating: 3
- #13.7 Canthz_B
  
  Solar!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:37 am rating: 3
- #13.8 Joe
  
  Ilar owknar igpar atinlar.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:38 am rating: 6
- #13.9 fluffy8u
  
  Nonspectacular!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:42 pm rating: 3
- #13.10 Bernd das Brot
  
  unkaputtbar?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:50 pm rating: 2
- #13.11 mamason
  
  exemplar!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:51 pm rating: 0
- #13.12 Beanster
  
  knights templar!!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:54 pm rating: 4
- #13.13 Bunnee
  
  Jugular!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:36 pm rating: 3
- #13.14 racerx2233
  
  nonsecular
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:37 pm rating: 1
- #13.15 Canthz_B
  
  Coca-Colar!
  
  May 27, 2009 at 1:58 am rating: 4
- #13.16 Canthz_B
  
  Impacted Molar!
  
  May 27, 2009 at 1:59 am rating: 4
- #13.17 Canthz_B
  
  Alveolar!
  
  May 27, 2009 at 2:07 am rating: 3
- #13.18 racerx2233
  
  Areolar
  
  May 27, 2009 at 6:38 pm rating: 2
add to this thread
#14 Canthz_B

I wonder how much each flush would run me in their Mens Room?
I courtesy flush, but I swear I’m good for it!!

May 26, 2009 at 12:57 am rating: 9

reply to this comment
- #14.1 se
  
  that’s a load of shit
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:13 am rating: 4
- #14.2 Mishee™
  
  Just leave your quarter on the tank….
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:38 am rating: 3
- #14.3 mamason
  
  …but it will get covered with teh fecal mist.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:59 am rating: 3
add to this thread
#15 Joeygirl

fuck that!

May 26, 2009 at 5:21 am rating: 13

reply to this comment
- #15.1 mamason
  
  succinct and to the point. +1
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:01 pm rating: 22
- #15.2 I suck
  
  Come on dummy you ruin the word when you add “and to the point.”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:43 pm rating: 2
- #15.3 Mishee™
  
  *thumbs mama just for the hell of it*
  
  *enjoys it*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:53 pm rating: 2
- #15.4 oi!
  
  *thumbs mama*
  *enjoys it* :evilgrin:
  
  May 26, 2009 at 5:06 pm rating: 2
- #15.5 TheOldSchool
  
  i suck, you had a good comment, but you ruined it by calling mamason a dummy. There’s no need for that kind of language. Not here. Not now. Not to mama.
  
  i suck, I think I know what the problem is: your name. It is reinforcing the negative feelings you have about yourself.
  
  If I were you, I’d change it to: “I’m feeling peppy and upbeat,” because even if you’re not, you can trick yourself into thinking that you are.
  
  Plus, you’ve got to admit, it is an awesome name.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:06 pm rating: 10
- #15.6 I'm feeling peppy and upbeat
  
  I don’t think it’s working.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 11:09 am rating: 4
add to this thread
#16 Lorelie

Ok, I’m more into humanities than math, so someone might need to check me on this, but —

Based on the assumption that people drink 8 oz glasses, and also based on that being a 5 gallon bottle, are the original note posters wanting a 300% profit margin?!?!

May 26, 2009 at 9:05 am rating: 3

reply to this comment
- #16.1 mamason
  
  Capitalism ftw!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:02 pm rating: 3
- #16.2 ClearlyDemented
  
  Do Americans have to teach Canadians everything? 300 percent profit, right? Okay. So give a third of that profit to a designated water changer. He gets paid per bottle (/bottle, Mamason), so he’ll be eager to check on it often. Note Writer makes more money; everyone has water. PROBLEM SOLVED. Sheesh. Was that so hard?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:28 pm rating: 9
- #16.3 fluffy8u
  
  I’m confused, isn’t the 300% mark up part of the “I can get anything here in prison” average?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:49 pm rating: 1
add to this thread
#17 monstrosity

Of course the notes kept disappearing – they’re taped right on to the bottle. What, I’m gonna change the bottle AND move the note over AND pay them twenty-five cents?

May 26, 2009 at 9:16 am rating: 28

reply to this comment
- #17.1 fluffy8u
  
  And you better leave a tip!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:51 pm rating: 1
- #17.2 Mark
  
  I’m very sorry the government taxes their tips, that’s fucked up. That ain’t my fault. It would seem to me that waitresses are one of the many groups the government fucks in the ass on a regular basis. Look, if you ask me to sign something that says the governemnt shouldn’t do that, I’ll sign it, put it to a vote, I’ll vote for it, but what I won’t do is play ball. And as for this non-college bullshit I got two words for that: learn to fuckin’ type, ’cause if you’re expecting me to help out with the rent you’re in for a big fuckin’ surprise.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:59 pm rating: 6
- #17.3 fluffy8u
  
  Wow, Mark… does this hit a little too close to home?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:28 pm rating: 2
- #17.4 Mishee™
  
  Mark is actually a 60 year old waitress named Alma in a small town in rural Arkansas. She pops gum constantly while smoking her ever present Virginia Slim Menthol Lights.
  
  She also has a hairlip, 6 missing teeth, and a horrible case of halitosis.
  
  And she carries a gun with her at all times, so don’t fuck her over on her tip, bitch!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:36 pm rating: 7
- #17.5 oi!
  
  hairlip! Toothfairy(I read tooth instead of thumb) hannibal! I thought precious would be last straw.
  Red dragon has been haunting me since morning today.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:46 pm rating: 1
- #17.6 oi!
  
  darn! that’s harelip.
  Damn you Mishee!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:04 pm rating: 1
- #17.7 Mishee™
  
  I had NO idea.
  
  The more you know…
  
  *rainbow*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 6:39 pm rating: 3
- #17.8 fluffy8u
  
  “The more you know…”
  
  The more you’re informed?
  And you see a rainbow?! Wow. What a special day.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:11 pm rating: 1
- #17.9 Alien8
  
  Re 17.2 Just throw in your share Mr. Pink
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:23 pm rating: 3
- #17.10 tinkerbell2
  
  it really took until 17.9 for someone to get poor Mark’s reference?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 7:59 am rating: 2
- #17.11 Mark
  
  Yeah, I was surprised too! I felt bad after fluffy8u chastized me but I thought I would stick with it. Glad somebody finally got it!
  
  *always tips 20% except in cases of truly horrendous service*
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:32 am rating: 3
- #17.12 Beanster
  
  in iceland, tipping is considered an insult.
  
  i love iceland for so many reasons.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:38 am rating: 3
- #17.13 Mark
  
  Including their total economic collapse?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:45 am rating: 3
- #17.14 mamason
  
  See what happens when you don’t tip?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 11:03 am rating: 2
add to this thread
#18 Gunderson105

If there was only some sort of faucet that was attached to the building plumbing that one could use for free…

May 26, 2009 at 9:22 am rating: 40

reply to this comment
#19 GhostWriter

The note reads more like a rental notice for the Bottled Water. “Any merchandising in this area costs a minimum of 25¢ per taxable sale…“

May 26, 2009 at 9:39 am rating: 3

reply to this comment
#20 GhostWriter

I find it obnoxious when somebody drags their own empty jug up to the communal Bottled Water, and proceeds to drain our reserves dry. Sometimes their damn bottle is nearly as big as the cooler’s bottle! What do they do with it all? I’ll bet they’re just pouring it into their cat’s bowl.

May 26, 2009 at 9:44 am rating: 3

reply to this comment
#21 Mishee™

I wonder what would happen if you don’t have a glass or water bottle to measure the amount taken.

How much would it cost if you just put your lips to the spout?

Also, is there a penalty fine for leaving lipstick marks on the spigot?

May 26, 2009 at 9:45 am rating: 4

reply to this comment
- #21.1 GhostWriter
  
  Bring a scale with you- a liter of water weighs about 1000 grams. Simply weigh the water you’ve taken, subtracting the weight of your vessel, then multiply the grams of water you’ve taken by .026 (in your head) and that is the number of cents you owe.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:57 am rating: 4
- #21.2 Mishee™
  
  GW – that makes no cents!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 10:13 am rating: 4
- #21.3 Beanster
  
  ” i don’t have a standard size drinking glass handy, but maybe we could get some use out of this 5 foot doctor’s scale. it’s bound to be more accurate. what do you mean i drank 16 litres of water? that can’t be right. let’s make sure im doing this right. i weigh *speaks loudly and unconvincingly* 120 pounds which is 54 KG. this scale says i now weigh 70 kilos, which is *gasps* 156 pounds?!?!?! that can’t be right! i only wrapped my lips around the spout for a couple of seconds.”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:24 am rating: 3
- #21.4 Mishee™
  
  “wrapped my lips around the spout”
  
  heh
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:34 am rating: 3
- #21.5 Beanster
  
  (that was for you mish)
  
  May 26, 2009 at 11:35 am rating: 2
- #21.6 Canuck
  
  LOL Ghostwriter!
  
  May 26, 2009 at 8:16 pm rating: 0
- #21.7 I'm feeling peppy and upbeat
  
  Oh, that joke you got, Canuck?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 11:14 am rating: 3
add to this thread
#22 MagPie

Team Tap Water!

May 26, 2009 at 10:16 am rating: 12

reply to this comment
- #22.1 mamason
  
  Yeah, they should tap that and tap it hard.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:05 pm rating: 5
- #22.2 MagPie
  
  The other office tapped it hard enough to leave lipstick marks… Maybe these jokers can learn something
  
  May 26, 2009 at 12:40 pm rating: 3
add to this thread
#23 Buzz

Our water bottles are delivered.

May 26, 2009 at 11:06 am rating: 2

reply to this comment
#24 claw71

I’m just borrowing this water. I’ll be sure to return it when I’m finished.

May 26, 2009 at 11:28 am rating: 12

reply to this comment
- #24.1 MagPie
  
  If it’s good enough for the astronauts, its good enough for everyone else!
  
  http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/090520-space-urine.html
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:22 pm rating: 1
- #24.2 Evil Homer
  
  So if I piss back into the bottle do I get a refund?
  
  May 27, 2009 at 9:28 am rating: 2
- #24.3 amy d
  
  If i piss back into the bottle,
  
  I wonder would I get a re-fund…
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:01 am rating: 1
add to this thread
#25 AuntyBron

Team Bring-Your-Own-Damn-Water-So-You-Don’t-Have-To-Pay-The-Thieving-Bastards

May 26, 2009 at 12:08 pm rating: 3

reply to this comment
#26 DM

The note said “please”. Of course people had to pay up at that point. It’s the polite thing to do.

May 26, 2009 at 12:21 pm rating: 3

reply to this comment
#27 TheOldSchool

Thumb Fairy has come, been, and gone. *poof*

May 26, 2009 at 12:23 pm rating: 5

reply to this comment
- #27.1 Snippy
  
  TOS, must you announce every time you ejaculate?
  
  Girlies can tell when you’re fakin’ it. Or do you think that this falls under the category of “Say it, don’t spray it”?
  
  May 26, 2009 at 2:12 pm rating: 3
- #27.2 Geek Goddess
  
  But now I need to go back and check to see if the Thumb Fairy was here before or after my comment, so I can tell if my thumbs were artificially inflated or not.
  
  *spends several seconds staring at thumbs before resuming typing*
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:12 pm rating: 4
add to this thread
#28 Fern

Dare I ask where to put the money?

May 26, 2009 at 1:21 pm rating: 3

reply to this comment
- #28.1 Bernd das Brot
  
  You thow it into the fountain.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 3:53 pm rating: 2
- #28.2 ClickClack
  
  As ye thow, tho shall ye reap.
  
  - OR -
  
  It thows it into the fountain or else it gets the hose again.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:15 pm rating: 3
- #28.3 Mishee™
  
  I propose “Mishee™’s Law”.
  
  Its like Godwin’s Law, but with Buffalo Bill/Hannibal Lecter quotes instead of Hitler.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:22 pm rating: 1
- #28.4 Esther Rose
  
  Don’t forget to make a wish Bernd das Brot..
  
  “I wish for free water.”
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:57 pm rating: 1
add to this thread
#29 Esther Rose

So, um, is the wine free?

May 26, 2009 at 4:23 pm rating: 1

reply to this comment
- #29.1 ClickClack
  
  Do not mispronounce Oprah’s name or she will have you whacked.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:25 pm rating: 1
- #29.2 Esther Rose
  
  That’s okay, as long as Oprah brings the free wine.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 4:34 pm rating: 1
- #29.3 fluffy8u
  
  She will, but you’ll have to pay the tax on it.
  
  May 26, 2009 at 9:40 pm rating: 1
add to this thread
#30 Snippy

Hey now, Canadians need a lot of drinking water to wash down all o’them tasty seal hearts.

May 26, 2009 at 7:47 pm rating: 1

reply to this comment
#31 WillBraden

the L stand for Loonie

May 26, 2009 at 11:25 pm rating: 1

reply to this comment
- #31.1 Geek Goddesss
  
  Well, for that you get 75 cents change.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 2:34 am rating: 1
add to this thread
#32 mishi

Don’t let my boss see that. He is forever bitching about the cost of bottled water. Its only a matter of time…. the odasity!

May 27, 2009 at 1:55 am rating: 1

reply to this comment
- #32.1 rahmalzee
  
  I stared at “the odasity” for a long time before realizing what the crap you were trying to say. It’s hard to look up the definition/correct spelling of a word when you don’t have the slightest clue how it even starts. Poor you.
  Happened to my mom (and sister, just to mention them both so Kip doesn’t have to) with the word “colonel” and she had to call me at school.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 5:33 am rating: 0
- #32.2 Mishee™
  
  *doesn’t feel that special anymore since someone out there not only shares her real name, but nickname too*
  
  May 27, 2009 at 8:22 am rating: 1
add to this thread
#33 katie

I read all the comments…and I still don’t fucking understand this one. Can someone explain real slowly to me how the post-it is a passive aggressive note? And, while you’re at it, what relevance the note sometimes being there and sometimes not has to the story?

Also, that’s bullshit. I don’t know what kind of wacky shit goes on in Canada, but here in L.A. a gallon of water is a quarter. Unless I’m drinking a gallon of your precious office water, I’m not giving you no 25 cents.

May 27, 2009 at 8:47 pm rating: 1

reply to this comment
- #33.1 Ella
  
  I think the issue is that the original sign asked for 25 cents per fill up, but that some disgruntled employee either kept stealing the sign and/or put up that post it afterwards after calculating the actual cost of water per litre.
  
  Either way, I find the fact that someone took the time to figure out how much the water actually cost per litre, rather than paying the quarter, hilarious.
  
  May 27, 2009 at 10:37 pm rating: 1
add to this thread
#34 stephizzal

Izzie, what UK are you living in?

£5 are blue-green
£10 are orange
£20 are purple
£50 are red

ok its a bit more subtle than the all-over green of american money, but still…
seriously, check it out

Jun 27, 2009 at 10:20 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#35 Missing Lunch

Why is their boss so cheap?

Jun 29, 2009 at 10:28 am rating: 0

reply to this comment
#36 HELP! MY COMPUTER IS STUCK ON CAPS LOCK! | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

[...] Paying through the spout [...]

Aug 17, 2010 at 10:05 pm rating: 0

reply to this comment

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