So…you guys take AmEx, right?

May 31st, 2009 · 196 comments

If you’re still a little confused about the forms of payment accepted at this shoe repair shop, Kate in Seattle says that while she could only capture four signs in this picture, there’s a fifth sign further to the right as well. (That’s the one that clears it up.)

So...you guys take AmEx, right?

related: as Davy Crockett once said…

FILED UNDER: blitzkrieg approach · Seattle


196 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Harry

    That’s like today, I saw a couple try to push open some sliding doors(????) and look inside with cupped hands at a store that had a huge CLOSED sign on its door.

    Some people…

    May 31, 2009 at 11:23 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   fluffy8u

      …oh…. I’ve done something like that. I am too smart for pushing open sliding doors though, but trying to enter closed shops. Guilty. One time a security guard stood laughing at me.

      The nerve of some people….

      May 31, 2009 at 11:40 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   DearJane

      Oh I used to love that when I worked in retail! Lights would be off, open sign dark, door locked. People would come to the door, tug and look confused. Some would wait 2-3 minutes, and try the tug again. What did they think? We had a sticky door and were trying to conserve energy with the lights off?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:40 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Bunnee

      When customers would do that to the door of the bank where I worked, we would yell “Pull harder!”
      Well, not exactly “yell”. More like “mutter it under our breath”. But the intent was there. :wink:

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:12 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   MAMARILLA2 bang

      My customers can open the doors well enough but they are really looking for the resaurant next door..They always walk in, walk out , walk in again trying to find where we hid the tables, then maybe they will ask.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:34 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   famous_lizzy

      When I’m closing after a long day, the best part is always watching people who try to open the locked door. However, they don’t stop there, they also knock on the glass, look offended that we closed before they could get in, and then ask us why the door is locked. Nothing is quite as sweet as the look of defeat they get just before they walk away in anger.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 3:02 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   Bunnee

      Then, to really piss them off, when they’re walking away, tell them “Have a good day!”, with a great big smile on your face!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:07 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   KatieMB

      Some customers let us know how “inconvenient” our hours are: “What time do you close on Sat? 6? Oh – because I came here Sat at 6:30 and you were closed. So I had to come back. You really should be open later.”

      Well sure, we could extend the hours, but we know it wouldn’t matter. Even if we were open 24/7, someone would complain about the hours: “I know why the prices are so high, it’s because you’re open 24 hours. I pay more for my athlete’s foot cream to pay you to stay open all day and night. Come on… who really needs their blood pressure meds at 3:20 AM?!?!”

      But at least we take checks and credit cards.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:28 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Dianne

    As silly as five signs sound, I can tell you people don’t read signs. When I worked for Xerox, I’d put huge signs on a dead machine, using “Pulsar Pink” paper (very bright) and people would flip it over, and punch buttons, then aggressively say “WHY DOESN’T THIS WORK!?!” (I would have loved to say “because you’re an idiot?”) but instead I would flip the sign back over and read it to them.
    Unfortunately that didn’t go over very well either.
    I can can still hear it “What sign?”….

    May 31, 2009 at 11:27 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   TheOldSchool

      Maybe five signs isn’t enough.

      May 31, 2009 at 11:58 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   TheOldSchool

      Maybe the shoe repair shop needs to borrow Kerry’s red arrows.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:00 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   fluffy8u

      KERRY, will you lend Mr. and Mrs. Shoe Repair your red signs?



      He says no.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:10 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   AuntyBron

      #2.1 TOS – 5 signs are not enough. I work in an ER where we had 9 signs on the automatic doors telling people that they needed to push the button on the wall to active the automatic doors. They still pushed the doors repeatedly before bothering to read the signs. Some people looked around, totally baffled, before they read the signs.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:35 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Canthz_B bang

      Are the the doors truly automatic if you have to push a button to activate them?
      I think not.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:44 am   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   TheOldSchool

      CB, this is yet another example of ploys today’s hospitals are using to raise revenue.

      They want the e.r. visitors to smash through the glass, cut themselves — and then, guess where the injured person is going to go to get treated?

      There are no morals in e.r.s anymore. That’s why I became a cobbler and NOT a doctor!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:11 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.7   Canthz_B bang

      Damn it, Jim! I’m a cobbler, not a doctor!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:22 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.8   oi!

      Of course people do not read signs! Only solution to that is to cover each and every corner available in PANs(Just like described in # 27). Yeah that will teach’em. May be they can page that every once in a while.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:58 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.9   se

      Hey CB, great reverse Star Trek reference.
      I can hear McCoy saying that

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:49 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.10   AuntyBron

      In one episode he said, “Damn it, Jim – I’m a doctor not a bricklayer!”

      Jun 2, 2009 at 1:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.11   mamason bang

      I don’t need a doctor, damn it, I am a doctor.

      Jun 2, 2009 at 2:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.12   AuntyBron

      Actually, TOS the doors weren’t glass, they were wood. Well, wood-ish. I think they started out with one sign. When that didn’t work they started adding signs – all caps, red sharpie marker, exclamation points – the whole schmear. Some one even put a sign above the button that said “Push button to active doors” The peeps still ignored all of the signs. Too bad I didn’t discover PAN until long after the notes disappeared during the ER remodel.

      Jun 2, 2009 at 3:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.13   raiseyourglass

      Thats because the put the open door button gurney length away from the door. Unless your in a gurney who would notice right off. They need a flashing light that goes from the door handle to the button. LOL

      Jun 2, 2009 at 5:18 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   park rose

    Someone should have told Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac about this concept.

    May 31, 2009 at 11:28 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   TheOldSchool

      I told them Rose, but my testicles lack ears, so I doubt that they heard me.

      And even if they had heard me, they’re dumber than a bag of rocks, so they wouldn’t have understood the gist of what I was repeating.

      Just out of curiosity, Rose, why did you want me to tell them, anyway?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:14 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   park rose

      Your testicles are named after the part for a woman’s nether regions (in Australian-Brit parlance)? Why doesn’t that surprise me? I think one should be called fannie, and one frank, rather than fred, then the whole debit-credit thing could go yin-yang as you threw another bratwurst in the barbie, and the world’s economic woes would be solved. . .or be perpetually unsolvable. If you stopped fiddling them, the same thing might occur, or alternatively, relief might never be gained.

      Just so you know, dumber than a bag of rocks is different from getting your rocks off. To your credit, I know you’re a fast learner. ;)

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:20 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   fluffy8u

    While others will be focusing on the CASH and CHECKS ONLY signs, Fluffy will be wondering how many signs are posted with the store’s hours. She counts two. Was one missed?

    May 31, 2009 at 11:37 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Canthz_B bang

    DAMN! I need to pay in cash and write a check?!

    May 31, 2009 at 11:38 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   fluffy8u

      Maybe you could use Visa? They are everywhere you want to be.

      May 31, 2009 at 11:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   agatha christie

      Except this particular shoe repair shop, apparently.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:39 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   TheOldSchool

    I’m wondering what days and hours this shop is open.

    May 31, 2009 at 11:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   fluffy8u

      Does that say till 4:05 on Saturday?

      Who closes at 4:05?

      May 31, 2009 at 11:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   Harry

      It’s another zero. ;)

      May 31, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   fluffy8u

      Oh… Harry, that’s disappointing. I guess it’s time to see Eye Doctor again. Either that, or I’m still drunk.

      May 31, 2009 at 11:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   TheOldSchool

      Don’t worry about it, Drunk, being Fluffy is just an aging part of the seeing process.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:19 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   fluffy8u

    Wait! I can’t read the one top right corner! What does it say?!

    May 31, 2009 at 11:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   TheOldSchool

      It says, “All drinks are on Fluffy.”

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:23 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   park rose

      It’s difficult to do shots off a rabbit, though.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:23 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   Snippy

      “Ssshhhhh! Be vewwy, vewwy quiet…. Heh-heh-heh-heh….”

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:45 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   unholyghost2003 bang

      Rose it is easier to do shots off a rabbit if your turn it off first.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:51 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.5   fluffy8u

      Unholy is an expert at taking shots off a rabbit. Me, I prefer the White Rabbit drink (it’s Jefferson Airplane’s favorite drink too) or the Roger Rabitt (guaranteed to turn every girl you meet into Jessica Rabitt for the night! After that, it’s up to you).

      And TOS, drinks were certainly on me last night! Didn’t pay for them though…

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.6   park rose

      Well, I have lately been thinking of the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party; Tea maybe being the William S. Burrough’s version of the word, which might bring Mishee running.

      Fluffy, you gotta slow down. I’m sorry I threatened to chop your feet off a few threads ago. You’re endearing (and I’m patronising and condescending. I know, I know…).

      UHG, that’s a shot rabbit, isn’t it? The stationary kind. Rabbit babies are kittens, so it kind of brings us back to the last note, misspellings accepted, but not credit cards nor cheques.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Thanks!

    I don’t think they’re truly sorry for any inconveniences they may have caused … :(

    May 31, 2009 at 11:43 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Sarcastraphe bang

      I don’t think they meant inconvenience, i think they meant incontinence

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   Thanks!

      Is that what caused the incontinence? Man, I could’ve saved myself a doctor’s visit!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:18 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   TheOldSchool

      “Yes, he is an enigma. So confident, yet so … je ne sais pas ce qu’est il au sujet de lui.

      “Look at the way he strides! There’s something definitely very incontinental about him.”

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:52 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   park rose

      Yes, he is an enema wrapped in a fecal mistery gently splattered within a piddle.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:28 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   ryanmalloy

      That’s when it all fell like s###

      Jun 1, 2009 at 3:08 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   Sue Do Nim

      Just keep him the hell away from my toothbrush!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:26 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   fluffy8u

    You know, I go to a Repeater’s Anonymous every Saturday at noon, they are welcome to come too, if they wish.

    May 31, 2009 at 11:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   TheOldSchool

      12 noon?

      May 31, 2009 at 11:54 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   fluffy8u

      Yes, but the ironic part of it is that every time we say that, they make us stand up and repeat the mantra in front of everybody.

      Now that’s irony!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:03 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   TheOldSchool

    What about travelers’ checks? Out of state checks? Third part checks? Cross checks? Body checks?
    Houndstooth checks?

    May 31, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Canthz_B bang

      Czech checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:03 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   fluffy8u

      Credit Checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:07 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Canthz_B bang

      Background checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:14 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   Canthz_B bang

      Yo-self checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:16 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   fluffy8u

      Rain Check?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.6   agatha christie

      Hand checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.7   TheOldSchool

      Cavity checks? Curfew checks? Bag checks? Coat checks? Sobriety checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:52 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.8   TheOldSchool

      Reality checks? I.D. checks? Does these low-voiced women have adam’s apples checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:56 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.9   Canthz_B bang

      Hat checks? Quality checks? Pay checks?
      Rebate checks? Security checks? Perimeter checks? Head checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:12 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.10   park rose

      Chubby checks.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.11   Phalange

      Chex mix?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 8:55 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.12   anglophile bang

      ✓ ☑ ✔ ✓ ☑ ✔

      Jun 1, 2009 at 9:16 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.13   Canthz_B bang

      I’m checking you out,’Glo!! :-D

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:13 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.14   Canthz_B bang

      Attitude at the door checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:14 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.15   ryanmalloy

      Check mate.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 3:09 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.16   MagPie

      panty checks? zipper checks? food in my teeth checks?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.17   raiseyourglass

      Prostate Checks?

      Jun 2, 2009 at 5:23 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Alie

    These signs are probably necessary, at least in southern California I don’t know about other places. A shop is in the stone age if it only accepts cash or check and it’s really infuriating, so to have a giant heads up is nice.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:00 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Jane Que

      The worst part is that people will still come in and ask if they take credit cards. At my job we have a sign at eye level on every register, people still ask. These notes are not PA in my opinion, they’re just P.

      For that matter, it’s a twenty-four hour shop except for one day a month. I always hang a sign on the door, again at eye level. People just have a problem understanding a sign saying ‘Closed’, an open sign that’s off, lights down and a locked door.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   Sherry

      I feel for you.

      I used to work in a small family owned import store. Lights off in the main store, closed sign on the door, door locked- but many a late night when we were doing inventory or something in the back rooms (you couldn’t see the back offices from the store front door)- you could hear people banging on the store’s front door… My boss & I would just keep an eye on them from the security monitor until they went away… Amazed by how often people did that.

      Jul 10, 2009 at 2:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   Canthz_B bang

    So, what are you trying to say?

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:01 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   fluffy8u

      I think it’s that they know how to post a sign. But whoop-dee-do, I’ve been posting signs since I was nine…teen.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   Anonymous Public

      that you’re a dumb bitch.

      flashback humour. buaahahahahahahaha

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   Sirius¤ bang

      I’m glad you’re following Mommy’s advice and staying anonymous in the chat rooms, but you still need to be careful; there’s a bad man named Claw who can smell pre-teen from miles away. Just don’t go for any van rides, cupcake.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:57 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.4   TheOldSchool

      Claw smells good?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:13 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.5   fluffy8u

      Aw, pre-teens, so young, so willing to prove that they’re older than they really are.

      And, um… nobody got my joke. That makes me sad. I’ll go staigten up Wall Mart with Mr. Monk, now…

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:20 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.6   unholyghost2003 bang

      Oh yes! Claw smells of intoxicating mix of powerful pheromones, cheep beer and Doritos.

      He also has a nose like a bloodhound.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:22 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.7   Anonymous Public

      @ Fluffy, that’s because you’re not actually funny, you’ve only been lead to believe you are by people in your immediate environment to not hurt your feelings.

      time to grow up, son!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.8   Sirius¤ bang

      AP, go ahead and add gender confusion to your list of charming personality quirks. It’s okay, it happens a lot at your age. Oh look, DeGrassi’s on in five minutes!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:32 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.9   Anonymous Public

      What’s DeGrassi?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.10   fluffy8u

      Oh, ow. Hold on, *yanks knife out of chest* I think this belongs to AP. *hands over knife* Use it to hurt someone else, because I don’t care. I’m comforatable enough with my life (and myself), not to depend on the thoughts of others.

      Once you get out of highschool, you’ll understand. And people around me have the guts to tell me when I’m not funny, but they tell me nicely.

      Sirius, she’s not into DeGrassi. AP is more of a the Hills, and 91210 kind of a girl.
      Gee. I wonder how I knew you were a girl. :roll:

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:55 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.11   park rose

      Must be cos’ you’re a guy, fluffy, in the way that Cb is America’s version of Unity Mitford.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:18 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   gretal

    I would SO have to buy something and ask “Can I use my credit card? How about my debit card?”

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:06 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Canthz_B bang

    Yes, because new shoes are so expensive that we still frequent the cobbler’s shoppe!

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:10 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   fluffy8u

      The Cobbler’s not even making the shoes. Don’t you know, CB? The elves make them! So really he’s claiming their work as his own.

      My professor says this is plagiarism.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:13 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   TheOldSchool

      Pinnochio’s father was named Geppetto. In Italian that translates into a word that sounds like “Gestapo” when your shoes have been repaired by someone who is drunk.

      ‘Nuff said.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:19 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   TheOldSchool

      Ooops. I wrote: “’nuff said,” too early.

      Let me clarify.

      You’re all going to jail.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:22 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.4   TheOldSchool

      Mama hated cobblers, so bad.
      I guess I knew it was somethin’
      to do with dad….

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:25 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.5   fluffy8u

      Me?! Gestapo was the one who was operating drunk!

      If I’m going to jail, I’m taking you with me TOS!!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:25 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.6   TheOldSchool

      Fluffy, are you, like, asking me out?

      I don’t know what to say … I’m flattered….

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:33 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.7   Canthz_B bang

      Maybe she was just allergic to peaches, TOS.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.8   TheOldSchool

      I’ll have her peaches. She can have my cream.

      Where’s my cellphone?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:46 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.9   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Millions of peaches, peaches for me.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:08 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.10   Mishee™ bang

      PotUSA FTW!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:12 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.11   Mark bang

      Peaches come in a can, they were put there by a man…

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:51 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.12   MAMARILLA2 bang

      But, I got a kitty on my foot and I want to touch it.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:56 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.13   claw71 bang

      I took a little nap where the roots all twist
      Squished a rotten peach in my fist

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:24 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.14   Canthz_B bang

      They could have my canned peaches…but the strawberries! The strawberries is where I drew the line!

      Oh my! I’ve lost my bearings!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.15   MAMARILLA2 bang

      I think it fell into that can of sand with a spoon in it.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.16   Snippy

      CB, raising Caine FTW!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:48 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.17   fluffy8u

      Wow, TOS. Thanks for the date invite, but it’ll never work. I’m a “let’s go drinking, you pay” kind of a girl, while you’re more “hold on, my peach cobbler is almost done” kind of a guy. Sorry, two different worlds. ;) Give my love to the wife and kids, though!

      I only have use for whipped cream (too drunk to whip it myself… huh..) so let me have my peaches back and stay out of my pantry!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   TheOldSchool

    These shoe repair guys know what they’re doing. It’s one of the oldest retailing tricks.

    Make your store look as dumpy as possible. (Like a “mom and pop operation” where mom and pop don’t know a thing about making money — their lives are devoted “solely” to repairing shoes.

    You put crude, hand-made signs everywhere. You keep hours that make no sense to a sane person. And you offer NOTHING whatsoever in the way of customer convenience.

    And then bilk the suckers who’ve bought into your scheme for whatever amount you feel like charging them.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:12 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   fluffy8u

      Yup… uh huh… uh huh… that’s whatever you were talking about for you…

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:24 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   Sarcastraphe bang

    Um… will you guys accept the last chicken from my wife’s dowry in payment for my soy chai?

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:13 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   fluffy8u

      No, but do you still have the pig?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:16 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Sarcastraphe bang

      I paid for an iPod with it :(

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:30 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   AuntyBron

      That must have been some pig!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:40 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Sarcastraphe bang

      sure was! Terrific, radiant, and humble too!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:46 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   Canthz_B bang

      Oh, what a tangled web we’ve weaved.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:47 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   Sarcastraphe bang

      face/palm

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:49 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.7   Canthz_B bang

      Timing is everything, asshole! :-P

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:57 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.8   Sarcastraphe bang

      Timing isn’t everything… for instance they don’t accept it as currency in Seattle

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:12 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.9   park rose

      Charlotte?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:34 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.10   Sarcastraphe bang

      Templeton?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:41 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.11   MAMARILLA2 bang

      WILBUR!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:31 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.12   Canthz_B bang

      Is that you, Ed?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:46 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.13   MAMARILLA2 bang

      That’s MR Ed to everyone but my best friend.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 4:54 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   fluffy8u

    It’s a shame that we can’t see the 5th sign. Does it very much from the others?

    And what’s this 1 picture only thing? Does Kate still live in the age of film rolls and can only spare 1 click? I know they have digital cameras in Seattle.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:16 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Canthz_B bang

      Does it very much what from the others?

      Oh! vary!!

      (well, you were following me around, so…) :-)

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   fluffy8u

      I was wondering who would catch that. Funny thing.. I thought it would be you.

      You’re following me?! STALKER, RAPE! MURDER! CB, I know your attracted to me, but I’m a “let’s drink and play strip poker” kind of girl, and you’re more of a “let’s study the dictionary” kind of guy. So, sorry. It’ll never work. Give my love to the wife and kids.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:38 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.3   Beanster bang

      (burgle)

      i miss bunnee

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.4   Bunnee

      Funny thing is, Beans, I’m following you!

      ;)

      Jun 2, 2009 at 3:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Freddie

    And I bet they still get people asking if they take credit/debit cards. People just don’t read.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:25 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   fluffy8u

      Or have much confidence in human intelligence, apparently.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.2   Sarcastraphe bang

      Did you really mean to use Tarzan syntax in that comment fluffy? Because it was strangle appropriate!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:32 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.3   Canthz_B bang

      Did you just have the fucking audacity to use the word “syntax” on this board?!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.4   Sarcastraphe bang

      Sheesh… you need a little more passive in your aggressive Canthz!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:56 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.5   Canthz_B bang

      Right.
      You get to pop in here and attack people, yet you expect immunity?
      Right.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:01 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.6   Sarcastraphe bang

      Immunity?! I have had my inoculations… bring it on! :)

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:11 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.7   Canthz_B bang

      Then you didn’t have immunity and needed to be immunized by inoculation.
      I’ve taken care of that for you, so carry on. ;-)

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:17 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.8   Sarcastraphe bang

      Thanks :) Now my bottom hurts

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:30 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.9   Canthz_B bang

      Hmm, they always say that…no matter how much lubricant I apply.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:40 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.10   TheOldSchool

      CB, you’re not supposed to drink it.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 2:18 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.11   fluffy8u

      Apart from being a fragmented sentence, my comment is correct. Perhaps you’d be more comfortable if I used an obviously correct form, such as:

      Nor do they have much confidence in human intelligence, apparently.

      I know that for alot of people who don’t have a complete handle on the English language, they tend to think the “odd” sounding phrases are incorrect. But trust me, “funner” is incorrect. “More fun” is the right phrase.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 5:59 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.12   park rose

      Fluff, you got my thumb. Now, Cb rushes to your defence and you spurn him and send him reeling back to the pages of his dictionary?

      How many simultaneous games of strip poker have you got running while you are wisely spurning the advances of middle-aged men?

      Fun is an uncountable noun, and I love to see it used correctly ;) The adjective is funny.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:24 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   TheOldSchool

    Sin taxes should be strangled, mangled, folded, spindled, mutilated, and then served piping hot on toasted prison buns.

    (It goes without saying that they should always be placed properly.)

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:38 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   TheOldSchool

      Pardon me, warden. I’m still learning the system.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   booge

    I’m guessing this place is a front. You come in, make a joke about paying in “wampum,” “beads,” or “skins,” depending on what you’re interested in, and they show you their other goods. They don’t take plastic to keep the riff raff out.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 1:21 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   park rose

    What a right load of old cobblers.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:20 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   park rose

      C’mon…where are all the antipodeans and Brits?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:26 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Joe bang

    “…at this time.” WTF? Like their machine is down? And yet they have taken a fair bit of care to protect the signs, implying they will be/have been around for a while?

    It’s time this shop joined the freaking 20th century. Then it will only be one behind!

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:45 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   claw71 bang

    Shoe repair? Sorry but if my chosen vocation is something that lost its relevance 50 years ago I’m taking payment anyway I can get it. That includes raw gemstones, mineral rights, livestock…even Diners Club.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:46 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   fluffy8u

      Sorry sir, ‘ow’s about you take my daughter? She’s a right good cook, she is. Know’s ‘ow to mend too, don’t cha, love? She’ll work off my debt, she will.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:06 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Joe bang

    Vibram sounds like a company that makes adult toys.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:48 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   fluffy8u

      Hmm.. I still prefer The Treasure Chest.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Mishee™ bang

    An even better sign from the Quik-Stop in Clerks…

    “If you plan to shoplift, please let us know”

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:53 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   anglophile bang

      This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fucking customers.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 9:29 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.2   MsDolfinn

      I’m not even supposed to be here today!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 9:44 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.3   Mark bang

      THIRTY SEVEN?!?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 10:55 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.4   Meesh

      Try not to suck any dicks on your way to the parking lot.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:54 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.5   unholyghost2003 bang

      I’m offering you my body and you’re offering me semantics.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.6   Rachet

      My friend here’s trying to convince me that any independent contractors who were working on the uncompleted Death Star were innocent victims when it was destroyed by the Rebels.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 1:44 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.7   DearJane

      There is no such thing as an innocent independent contractor….

      Jun 1, 2009 at 2:24 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.8   fluffy8u

      Our policy is: If for any reason you are not completely satisfied, I hate you.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:17 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.9   Jane Que

      “If you are cranky, rude or obnoxious there will be a surcharge for putting up with you”

      Jun 2, 2009 at 3:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   Meesh

    Maybe instead of printing and posting all those signs the owners should just start accepting credit and debit. The girl scout troop in my neighborhood accepts credit cards for crying out loud.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 8:55 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   claw71 bang

      I know! Hell, I even take credit cards when I’m holding girl scouts for ransom. Even though we all know I’m not returning those little sluts to their parents.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:05 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   unholyghost2003 bang

      Really Meesh. I mean, doesn’t the owner watch TV? Want to accept credit cards? iPhone/iTouch has an app for that.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:09 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.3   Sirius¤ bang

      Sorry, nothing to add. I just Googled itouch & girl scouts and it brought me here.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:17 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.4   Canthz_B bang

      I’d be “apalled” if my daughters were out selling their cookies, claw.

      I applaud your getting these little sluts off our streets!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:22 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.5   aaa

      These shop owners are dinosaurs, ghost. Nobody gets their shoes repaired anymore, they just throw their broken shoes out and get new ones. I bet they don’t even have cell phones with music players on them. *snort*

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.6   unholyghost2003 bang

      actually recent polls have shown that more and more people are getting their shoes repaired rather than buy new because of the economy.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:29 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.7   Mark bang

      It’s generally better to repair leather hiking boots than to buy new ones. Especially heavy backpacking boots that take a long time to break in. Their soles are easily replaced, whereas buying and breaking in a whole new pair would be expensive and could take months.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:33 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.8   aaa

      Yeah, I do suppose my joke is a couple months too late. :P

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.9   Canthz_B bang

      So I guess, since business was slow, they whiled away the hours cobbling together signs.
      Now they need to pay that phone bill and take credit cards again!

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:37 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.10   MAMARILLA2 bang

      My Hubby wanted his boots half-soled..I told him it would be better if we sold them both.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:39 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.11   unholyghost2003 bang

      also, no matter how wealthy you are you resole the $1000 Italian loafers at least once, you don’t just throw them out (Same with repairing a broken heel on a good quality pump.)

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:39 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.12   Canthz_B bang

      I don’t know…OJ tossed those BM’s right quick! LOL

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:43 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.13   Meesh

      Totally! There’s no repairing HIS soul…

      Jun 1, 2009 at 11:56 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   aaa

    Y’know, I’d believe them more if they used rainbow font and cutesy clipart. I’m not gonna believe that I can’t wheedle my way into using my Visa card until they use a formatting that says that they mean business. I think even some inconsistent justification would cut my number of requests to use credit or debit by half.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 11:21 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   oi!

    Even though you can buy a new pair of shoes at target at half price than we charge you for repairing, we won’t accept cash. NO! We won’t succumb to tyranny of credit card companies and give away even penny from our profit to them. We will file bankruptcy just like GM but we refuse to see current market trends! This is a matter of principle after all.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 11:50 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   oi!

      Edit to 28: we won’t accept cash
      We won’t accept credit or debit cards.
      I am sure you got that but my subconscious won’t rest until I post this.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 12:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   GhostWriter bang

    I’ve loaded the pic into my image interpolation device (a la Blade Runner) and located the 5th sign; to the right, behind a half-filled box of grommets.

    Congratulations – You have just discovered the secret message! Century Bank Cards are OK…

    …but you have to hold a mirror up to the sign to decipher this.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 12:43 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   park rose

      The 5th Element?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:29 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.2   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Muulti-pass?

      Jun 8, 2009 at 2:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #30   octavius

    Well I’m with the cobblers. The times I’ve got stuck behind some dimwit paying a chump change bill with plastic are inumerable. Just carry the cash around, hand it over and get your change FFS. I’m going to have a freaking embolism next time some joker pulls out a concertina size wad of cards, gets their PIN wrong, has to get another card, etc. Either that or go postal, so if this were my local cobbler he’d be doing everyone a favor.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 1:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   unholyghost2003 bang

      That is why they have the PayPass thing now

      Jun 1, 2009 at 2:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #30.2   park rose

      The cobbler I go to is an old Italian guy who operates a shoe-repair service at the back of his house. He charges a third of what the guys in swish supermarkets do. No credit cards, no debit cards, just a damn good job at a very good price. No jokes here.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:31 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #31   oi!

    PAN is getting too popular. People are refraining from writing a PAN worthy note and Kerry has to resort to mediocre note like this.

    Jun 1, 2009 at 2:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   fluffy8u

      I dsagree, because of PAN, I’ve been writing more notes around the house (but I won’t send them in to Kerry, because of the whole “how dare you send in self made notes” thing, no matter how good). My sister has also started writing PANs, but her’s aren’t intresting, so I won’t send them in.

      And believe me, there was a good one that guilt triped the house and called people lazy. It disappeared… :( I would have liked to keep it.

      Maybe Kerry likes these notes because he can use his red arrows.

      Jun 1, 2009 at 6:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   park rose

      Do you do this before or after the strip poker and wild nights of drinking?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.3   oi!

      and all this time I thought Kerry was woman!
      PAN goddess ah? rumor?

      Jun 1, 2009 at 7:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   Delurker

    So, I’m confused, will they take my check card?

    Jun 1, 2009 at 4:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   SARAH

    Mmmm… cobbler sounds yummy, especially if it’s a grammatically correct PAN cobbler. ;)

    Jun 1, 2009 at 6:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   MKAT

    Okay, someone had to say it:

    “I saw the sign.
    And it opened up my eyes,
    I saw the sign!”

    Jun 1, 2009 at 6:56 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Kaitertot

    Who gets their shoes repaired?

    This is America. After the tenth time we’ve worn the same pair, we simply throw them away and buy new ones. With credit cards.

    A shoe repair shop, hahaha…

    Jun 2, 2009 at 2:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   raiseyourglass

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujXN_jNSwKg

    Jun 2, 2009 at 5:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Laumie

    Dude. Having worked in retail, and having having had our credit machines go down for a week once, I can safely say that they needed at least four more signs to get the point across.

    And even then, people would still ask if they took credit/debit cards.

    Jun 3, 2009 at 12:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Alien8

    Dude, so you will accept this postdated, two-party out of state check, and not my debit/credit card? Then I need twice as much fireworks/whippets/etc

    Jun 4, 2009 at 12:40 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   skekzok

    Inorite? Where I work we have our hours of operation along with what cards we take displayed in no less than seven places! In some cases, right next to each other. We have had the same hours for years. No one has a clue what cards we take or what our hours are.

    Jun 4, 2009 at 1:13 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Jinx

    Ok… They don’t take credit cards or debit cards, but checks they take? I wonder how many bounced checks they recieve? I don’t even know any stores that take checks anymore.

    Jun 8, 2009 at 2:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   George the Girl

    Where I work we have lots of big neon signs stating the same thing and people still try to hand us cards…very sad to imagine people that blind and unobservant driving!

    Jun 17, 2009 at 3:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Jackie

    There have been many of time where I just wanted to put the same sign up, all over the place at work.
    And to label where to order, and where to pick up your order.

    We have a second register, that is RARELY used, that always says closed on it. People would still line up behind this register, so we put a very large sign over the register, saying it was closed, and to move down to the other one.

    We constantly get people lining up at the pick up counter, and the closed register with a huge sign over it.

    I constantly just want to shake the shit out of every dumb ass who lines up where signs tell them not to.

    So I understand why the have 5 signs up.

    Jun 18, 2009 at 4:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   tom

    I know this place, and let me tell you that that guy is an AMAZING asshole. He used to have only one of the signs up, and it was hard to see when he was behind the counter standing in front of the thing. A friend of mine had a repair done, attempted to pay with a card and was told he took cash only. There were no other customers anywhere near the place and it was early afternoon- well before closing time. She excused herself to literally cross the street and get cash from an ATM, and a couple of minutes later, when she returned, he told her the price had gone up five dollars for “wasting his time”. He’s called “The Shoe Nazi” around here and I tell everyone to go to another repair shop the next town over. Once they hear this and a couple of other anecdotes about this bastard, they thank me.

    Jun 26, 2009 at 7:37 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     

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