Soyf*ckers Anonymous

June 22nd, 2009 · 358 comments

Spotted by our anonymous (and uninvolved) submitter on the office bulletin board at a “super mega corp” in Columbus, Ohio…where apparently a vegan “safe space” is, um, kind of in order (sob).

Vegan? Vegan, vegetarian or vegan-curious?  Casual, non-judgemental support & opportunities to connect!  Monthly meetups within the community.  JOIN NOW! The Columbus Vegan Meetup Group  Carnivore? Chances are you don't need some wimpy support group. Keep being AWESOME!

related: P.S. bacon is life

extra credit: Passive-aggressive vegan grocery cashier, a day in the life [McSweeneys]

P.S. Like this post? See more like this by following @panotes on Twitter, on Facebook, or via RSS!

FILED UNDER: clip art catastrophe · Columbus · food · most popular notes of 2009 · office · smartass


358 responses so far ↓

  • #1   fluffy8u

    According to this, I’m awesome! And I will keep being awesome, thank you Mr. Dino!

    Jun 22, 2009 at 3:55 pm   rating: 109  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   TheOldSchool

      It sucks that there’s not contact info on the carny flier that I received. Is it going to be a secret meeting?

      Yeah, now I get it. (We don’t want a bunch of weirdos showing up. Smart. That’s using the old meat-fueled-head. But, seriously….where is it?)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:06 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Doug Dorpinghaus

      Hey TOS . . hilarious. I mean totally. ROFLMcarnavoreBO. Oh, wait . . . unless . . . um . . .well . . . you ARE totally serious and then, well, that would be sad because then you’d be a vegetable. And that vegan support group, sounds a lot like a bunch of veggies thrown together and tossed about. Which sounds a lot like a salad. And that would make you rabbit food. Rabbits are not carnivores even if they have hot bunny buns (so I’ve read). But they are carnivore fodder. And that . . . hey . . that makes a loop, a circle . . no missing link! And “G”, regarding comment 5.1 . . . when people (yes, vegans are people too) are hungry, they get cranky. So, hey, cut them some slab . . um . . heh heh . . .I meant slack. Honest. No, really. I did.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:35 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   G

    Ah, memories.

    In college, after a nasty vegetarian/omnivore flamewar, some of us formed the “Carnivore Club.” Our club’s sole mission was to go out and eat steak. Lots of steak.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:05 pm   rating: 117  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Shadow Lurker

      I have heard that grain-fed animals are the tastiest of all….so if it came down to cannibalism, I’m picking a vegan.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:09 pm   rating: 280  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Joe bang

      At college, my friends and I weren’t too interested in any of the fraternities, so we made our own. We called it Eta Pi. (Better than steak.)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:14 pm   rating: 63  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   ClickClack bang

      That must have made the local sororities view you with optimism.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:48 pm   rating: 45  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   jess

      my college had PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:56 pm   rating: 51  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Beanster bang

      the vegans at my school play video tapes of butcher shops and animal torture (not the same, i know) in the student lounge… so we would get burgers and eat them while we watched.

      we didn’t actually enjoy the videos, in fact they were quite disturbing, but we wanted to bug the vegans more.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:48 pm   rating: 97  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   acce245

      Yeah, in ag class we had to watch different animal processing videos. I like tasty animals. Although, where but Ohio would you expect to see something like this and not expect a lawsuit? Go Columbus!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 5:25 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Kathleen

    I don’t think I’ve ever laughed this hard at a PA note before. Team T-Rex! vs. Team Tree! to the death.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:07 pm   rating: 63  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   oi!

      Team don’t want to eat any bloody animals!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:59 pm   rating: 35  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Snippy

      So… you’re willing to eat animals that are free of blood?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:04 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   oi1

      hear that in English accent.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:18 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   oi!

      and what exactly is free of blood ? as in wooden board free of any defects? you buffed and groomed your horse so much is it now free of blood? :P
      Are you Dracula? then you are in wrong thread. go see 2.1.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:31 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   Snippy

      oi1/oi! – I have no idea what your questions about wooden boards and horses might mean. No, I’m not a vampire; I was making a joke. Lighten up, or you’ll think all of these threads are wrong.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:42 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   oi!

      can you see smiley :P? I am not Isuck.
      ok :D :) ;) :twisted: :evil: now?
      I was just saying that you should use without instead of free of . I am not grammar expert but that sounds definitely wrong.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:48 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   Snippy

      Glad to see you’re not taking anything here too seriously. Now, as to whether the term free of is legitimate, teh Internetz is your friend. It is most commonly heard in expressions such as free of charge, free of defects, and free of disease. BTW, before going home with any drunken skanks, you should be sure that all of those conditions are met.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:00 pm   rating: 37  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   oi!

      ok did not I say as in free of defects? look wood board can acquire defect but you can remove it and make it free of defect similarly somebody can acquire disease but you cure (remove) them. make them free of disease and something(say some service) can be charged for but you can remove the charge and make it free of charge. so when you say free of blood animal are you saying it had blood before and then removed or are you implying those bloodless animals(octopus?) have blood one or other time? you were playing on my sentence that I would be ok eating bloodless animals right? but you said free of blood so I made a joke about you make your animals free of blood by sucking it. essentially I was trying to highlight a difference between bloodless and free of blood.
      ok I officially lost interest now. you win. :eyeroll:

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:18 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.9   oi!

      so I assume you are free of all them? :P
      let’s meet at bar xx in town yy for some fun! ;)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.10   acce245

      at oi 3.6,

      ‘Free of’ is just as correct as without. Perhapst this be why thou art not a grammatician? Behold, for our language is Germanic (not German), and thus ask and axe do indeed mean the same thing (seriously google it).

      Jun 23, 2009 at 5:28 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   John F.

    Haha, amazing.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:09 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   katie

      Seriously, I’m with the carnivore! That note is awesome.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 9:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   MAMARILLA2 bang

    I’m given to believe that the poor soul that posted these notes on the board was dissed mightly by a vegan office mate. Self worth is everything.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:10 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   G

      I think vegans just go out of their way to be offensive to everyone who eats meat. Or, well, everyone. When someone is an irritating as a vegan, it is pleasant to be able to stick one up their snoots. This PAN does a lovely job.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:51 pm   rating: 78  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   ClickClack bang

      Eat me!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:53 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   MagPie

      I agree with G. Us meat eaters do not sit there glaring into salad bar windows gaging or throwing confetti or hummus in an effort to show the vegans the errors of their ways. However, if I so much as even think that the beef jerky looks good at the organic food store in town, my tires are slashed and the words “MURDERER” are scrawled in red paint on my window.
      And that’s just rude

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:24 pm   rating: 69  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   oi!

      oh people do that? then they are stupid and rude. I don’t think there are enough recourses on the earth if everybody decides to go vegetarian/vegan. so I am happy other people eat meat actually.
      yeah I am selfish like that.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:38 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Canaduck

      I can see why you might have thought that. Actually, though, since it takes about 2 pounds of grain to get a pound of chicken, 5 pounds to get a pound of pork, and 7 pounds to get a pound of beef, we’d have MORE resources if we didn’t eat meat.

      Oh, and the average meat-eater uses up about 5000 litres of water a day, whereas a vegan uses 1000-2000. (Feel free to look it up, these stats are all over the place.)

      I agree that it’s TOTALLY rude for people to throw paint or make gagging sounds when others are eating, but come on, how often does that really happen? But let’s face it, there are assholes in every group–for example, vegans who make gagging noises, and meat-eaters who make “People Eating Tasty Animals” (which should be banned just on the basis of having been heard ten million times) and “Mmm, don’t you want a nice bloody steak?” jokes!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:04 pm   rating: 95  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   N/A

      Well said Canaduck! I’ve never berated someone for eating meat but I’ve heard a lot of lameass jokes and PA BS from people who assume that my personal dietary choices are a reflection on them. Can’t a slab of tofu just be a slab of tofu instead of being a judgement?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:52 pm   rating: 71  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.7   TheOldSchool

      Surely, I’m not the only one here who gets slightly turned-on by gagging sounds?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:36 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.8   macstuart

      No…you are not alone.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:38 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.9   Phalange

      Anyone who doesn’t think that simply being vegan doesn’t offend anyone has never had to deal with nasty vegan farts.

      Team Top O’the Food Chain

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:08 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   mamason bang

    Hi. My name is Kelly and I’m a vegan.

    Hi, Kelly.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:12 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   brennan

      Hi. My name is Willow and I’m a vegan.

      Hi, Willow.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:37 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   MAMARILLA2 bang

      JOIN US! (cue ominus, creepy music)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:43 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   mamason bang

      mmmmm… thanks thumb fairy. That was nice.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:41 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   TheOldSchool

      So was the plum!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.5   mamason bang

      That wasn’t a plum. :oops:

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:04 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.6   NewMoon

      Hi. My name is Kirsten and I am a vegan.
      It has been three weeks since my last vegetable.

      Uh, Kirsten?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:30 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.7   park rose

      @6.4 & 6.5:
      Hi, my name is William and I eat plums which don’t belong to me.
      They are so delicious, sweet and cold.
      Just to say.
      Please forgive me ToS, Mama and li’l Jack.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:09 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.8   michael

      is that a william williams reference?
      well done

      Jul 7, 2009 at 1:05 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Anon

    I’m with Team T-Rex, awesome!

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:12 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   T imo® bang

    Mike Hawke: Have you seen my steak?

    Cindy Lutz: Why did you misplace it?

    Mike Hawke: No, because it is AWESOME I wanted you to see it!

    edit: Yeah it is a play on this.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:16 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   fluffy8u

      That steak was awesome?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   MagPie

      It was fucking delicious

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:15 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   fluffy8u

      Oh, so that’s how that goes…

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   fluffy8u

      Dang it! I meant to add ” :roll: .”

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   jadefirefly

    In high school, a friend and I hung out at a coffee shop frequented by a lot of the other seniors and community college kids in the area. TONS of them were vegan, and boy did they want to tell you about it. Especially because my friend just sort of gave off that vibe of being eco-hippy for some reason. (She wasn’t.)

    Every now and then we’d hike down to the nearest Jack in the Box, and each bring back a huge, disgustingly greasy Ultimate Cheeseburger and eat it, there on the patio outside the coffeeshop. We called it Carnivore Food.

    It pissed off the vegan-recruitment crowd something awful. I miss that friend.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:32 pm   rating: 62  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   warinthepocket

      i love people like you. My wife will be someone like you.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:08 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   mamason bang

      Was that a proposal or the beginning of a long creepy stalking event?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:24 pm   rating: 44  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   TheOldSchool

      It sounded to me very much like a space-age robot giving an order.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:34 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.4   fluffy8u

      My first job was at as theraputic spa center (no, they didn’t offer “happy endings” to their massages). Everybody there was vegetarian, but me. They didn’t like me much because of my “uneducated ways,” so they thought to inform me on the dangers of eating meat not only to the animal itself, but to the human body consuming it (funnily enough, they all smoked).

      Just to spite them I would go down to the deli and ordered a meat lovers club sandwhich, two kinds of ham, extra turkey, and roast beef. That thing was massive and the meat on it could be seen from across the room. I would then get a water bottle, relable it so it read “Extream Walrus Juice” and fill it with grape juice. Among my collection of juices were “Giraffe Soda” (orange soda, giraffe juice was just apple juice, or beer if it was a rough day) and “Panda’s Blood” (cranberry juice), often spiked with something.

      Boy, did this get them in a huff! After a little act, I would be presented with an all new presentation on how “animals are our friends and we should treat them as such.” Yeah, whatever, just hand me a steak.

      I eventually quit not because they thought that I “wasn’t responsible enough to attend to this particular job,” but because I wanted to spend more time on my book. When they replaced me, it was with a vegan.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:57 pm   rating: 47  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.5   Snippy

      And was that book To Serve PAN or I, Fluffer?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:04 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.6   fluffy8u

      I, Fluffer. You can get it at your local Wal-Mart! Why do you think I’m online all the time? I’m supposed to be doing that thing that pays for my rent and stuff (the writing), but it goes back to the procrastination thing.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:24 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   oi!

    I am awesome but vegetarian kind. And I love leather boots.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:36 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Woman on the Verge bang

    Omnivore?

    Yeah, we eat everything so shut the hell up!

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:40 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Gustav J Gustav

    Bunnies and mice are accidentally slaughtered by the billions each year during mechanized harvesting of wheat and vegetables.

    Animals are dying either way. Eat what you like and don’t feel guilty about it.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:43 pm   rating: 66  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   ClickClack bang

      “Hey, this bread tastes like bunnies and mice!”

      “It’s fur-caccia.”

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:52 pm   rating: 59  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   T imo® bang

      Hareble rye

      Jun 22, 2009 at 4:54 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   Snippy

      Red beans and mice!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:20 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.4   mamason bang

      warm bunny buns!

      8-O *that just sounds wrong*

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:26 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.5   TheOldSchool

      But it feels so right.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:37 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.6   T imo® bang

      Poodle noodle soup.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:44 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.7   Canaduck

      Um, wait, so by that logic, I should start steering my car towards every animal that gets in my way because hey, I’m going to kill a couple during a lifetime of driving anyway?

      We have to eat, many of us have to drive. That doesn’t mean we should make no effort whatsoever to harm as few animals as possible.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:07 pm   rating: 46  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.8   fluffy8u

      Bunnees DIE?! :shock:

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:12 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.9   Bunnee

      Gosh, I hope not! (at least for my sake, I’m selfish that way) :lol:

      No, for your sake, too, Fluffy….

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:39 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.10   Meesh

      Canaduck, you rock.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:28 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.11   MsDolfinn

      Bunnies don’t die…they just get their own reality show (ala Kendra Wilkinson.)

      Jun 23, 2009 at 9:42 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   awesome

    http://beingacarnivore.isfuckingaweso.me/

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:46 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   T imo® bang

    nevermind

    Jun 22, 2009 at 4:53 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Snippy

      I don’t care if it was used as an album title, “nevermind” is not a single word, but an incorrect conflation of “never mind.”

      And as long as I’m being all pedantic, there is no such word as “alot” (would you also write “abunch” or “alittle”?), there is no ‘a’ in the word definitely, and anyone who still manages to confuse to, too, and two after the age of 5 is an idiot.

      And get off my lawn.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:11 pm   rating: 67  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   mamason bang

      I definately don’t want two argue with you but you are being to harsh. *oh, look. This is comment number fourteen dot too*

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:23 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   T imo®

      Never-mind?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:39 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.4   TheOldSchool

      America was built on the concept of “manifest pederasty.”

      “Isn’t that right, boys?”

      (They’re nodding yes. They can’t speak with their mouths full.)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:42 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.5   Snippy

      You’re just filling their little heads with knowledge, right, TOS?
      (And telling them to let their little heads do the thinking?)

      P.S. – Nice reply, mamason. :)

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.6   TheOldSchool

      I’ll admit the part of the educational experience that I look forward to the most is the “one on one mom and teacher” overnight conferences.

      The moms are so relaxed knowing that dad is at home, hundreds of miles away, bonding with the kids. No phones. No outside distractions. We get a lot accomplished.

      If there are any unanswered questions, my revolving door is open 24/7.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.7   mamason bang

      *coughslutcough*

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:31 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.8   TheOldSchool

      Mamason, that sounded bad. I have something that you can gargle. It will make your throat feel smoother.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:39 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.9   park rose

      I find it interesting that the nevermind comments, including my own, get the thumb, often. It’s an easy way to get love.

      I think that microsoft word, micro soft word, micro-soft word doesn’t realise that there can be a lunchbox and a lunch box and a lunch-box. I’m all for icecream and highschool, personally. It doesn’t realise that there can be a realize, either. Oh, the confused minds of the computer-generated generation.

      Mama is the best. Defiantly.

      I think I should get some work done.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 8:22 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.10   FCStaehle

      Good job correcting that guy, dude. If you hadn’t done that, we might never have known what he was trying to say. People like you really grind my gears- the self-important, smug types who think they need to correct other people’s spelling and grammar just to stroke their own superiority complexes.

      The thing is, this is an informal thread. The guy’s not writing a paper, he’s not putting together an article, he’s not sitting in English class. He’s chewing the fat (Haha! Get it?! On a vegan thread!) and just hanging out and doesn’t need to ensure his i’s are dotted and his t’s crossed.

      Leave the guy alone. He clearly got his point across.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:40 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.11   park rose bang

      Snippy’s alright! all right? and T’s got the ♥ orright?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:49 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.12   TheOldSchool

      FCS (and anyone else who might be concerned):

      I’m now offering grammar insurance. For $24.99 a month, I’ll make sure that all of your comments to PAN are correctly spelled and punctuated.

      Why suffer through the hurtful retorts?

      For those who order in the next 15 years, I’ll include the following bonus gift: you have the right to name one of my pubic hairs (testicular only) after someone special in your life. It will be that person’s short ‘n’ curly for eternity.

      Wait! There’s more! For only $3.95 (plus shipping and handling) your special pubic pal will receive an 8″ by 11″ map with a hand drawn map showing exactly where his or her pube is located. The map is drawn upon high quality “laser” paper, and it is guaranteed to be “frame-ready.” A photcopy of this map will be officially “logged” with the US Copyright Office in Washington D.C.!

      Act now! Those who delay may find that they’re left with nothing but the hairs on my anus.

      *not that there’s anything wrong with them*

      Jun 22, 2009 at 11:20 pm   rating: 32  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.13   Meesh

      “You know what really grinds my gears? People in the 19th century. Why don’t they get with the freakin ‘program?”

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:34 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.14   TheOldSchool

      Meesh. Gimmee a hug, ya big lug!

      When the world hands you lemons — turn them into makeshift ball-gags, or paint them green and turn them into grenades (or limes!).

      Why grind your gears? Maybe these 19th century people are just waiting for someone like you to create a program they feel comfortable “getting with.”

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:11 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.15   JoshD

      Their is to much discussion a bout grammer on this web-site. I don’t care much four it. So they’re!

      On a serious note:

      Is across a word? How about about? Why not have abunch?

      Luckily my code syntax is always spot on, not so for my writing. And that is why I have a QA team.

      **Had to start a sentence with and just to tweak someones nipple!

      *Cheers*

      Jun 24, 2009 at 2:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Lauren

    I’ve been a vegetarian forevz, and I do get a lot of flack for it, but I don’t shove it in people’s faces, nor do I condone those who do. The carnivore thing is hilarious. I love that they copied the style of the other flier.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 5:17 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Snippy

      After enough booze, you might get some action if you do shove it in people’s faces.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:23 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.2   NoExit

      Lauren, I can let it slide that you are a vegetarian. However, the use of the word forevz is absolutely not acceptable.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:33 pm   rating: 61  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.3   fantasy bang

      Snippy, do you mean that after enough booze, “the other white meat” sounds like a good idea.

      *beats the hell out of any vegtable I can think of.*

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:28 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.4   Snippy

      Why beat your vegetable when you can beat your m–
      Nah, too easy. :roll:

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:48 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.5   GK bang

      Excuse me, NoExit: I believe you mean the alleged word “forevz”.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 5:30 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   TheOldSchool

    What about us meat-eaters who just like to vegetate? What are we called?

    (Besides: “brain-dead-slobs,” “lazy gits,” “husbands,” “toad-witted-fucks,” “dud-heads,” and “mamason’s soon-to-be-ex-son-in-law.”)

    Jun 22, 2009 at 5:29 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   mamason bang

      I LOVE YOU!

      Oops. Did I shout? All I meant to say was, hi.

      Hi. :oops:

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:35 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   TheOldSchool

      I’ve got a swell idea!

      Let’s lay around and eat meat!

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:39 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   mamason bang

      You’re such a ham! :lol:

      Though, I could go for a nice summer sausage.

      I was going to make a comment about condiments but it just didn’t cut the mustard.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 5:48 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   TheOldSchool

      Mamason,

      Believe me, this isn’t a beef of mine, but sometimes your insinuations are so vealed, it takes me a while to ketchup.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:47 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Shirley

    I am vegetarian, but I really try to not throw it up in people’s faces. I accept that not all people are going to agree with my viewpoints, and I can only do so much. I will gladly answer questions regarding my choices, but but the only time it really comes up at work is if there is a potluck. Biggest thing that kills me is those people that think ‘oh you can eat fish right?’. There are a lot of misconceptions out there, and it’s amazing how much misinformation gets around.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 5:45 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Snippy

      Thank you for not throwing up vegetables in my face.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:05 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   mamason bang

      Well, I’m an omnivore and I try not to throw up in peoples faces either but accidents happen… like when my dad made a cheeseburger pie.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 6:11 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.3   park rose

      Snippy, especially the carrots. It doesn’t matter what you have eaten, but when it comes to upchucking the insides, the diced carrots magically appear. Shirley sure is considerate, even if she’s got a thing against Episcopalians.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 8:29 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.4   Shirley

      Um, why would you think I have something against Episcopalians? I never said that.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 6:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.5   heisa

      i think they meant catholics, not episcopalians [not that i think shirley has a thing against either group]. just the whole, No Meat During Lent But You Can Have Fish On Fridays thing. tell me THAT’S not confusing when you’re a kid. people seriously grow up thinking that fish isn’t meat.

      for the record, i have since left the catholic church. hehehe.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:24 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.6   park rose

      No, my mistake Shirley. My mad googling skills let me down, and my shaky general knowledge. I should have said the Ichtus Christian Fellowship. It was a tangential arrow that was never never really too well aimed at a hypothetical target. All a little fishy. Apologies.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.7   glastonberry

      Shirley said: “I am vegetarian, but I really try to not throw it up in people’s faces. I accept that not all people are going to agree with my viewpoints, and I can only do so much.”

      What the hell does that mean? What is it exactly that you need to “do”?

      Jun 24, 2009 at 8:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Sean

    Funny, last I heard, no humans are truly carnivores…

    Jun 22, 2009 at 7:17 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Rawr!

      Obviously it’s a group for Tyrannosaurus Rex, not humans.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:03 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #18.2   GK bang

      Well, humans can feel free to attend too. Snacks have to provided somehow, after all.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 9:17 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   fluffy8u

    Seriously? 73 comments and no jokes from the Simpsons? I know you guys know they have a plethora of vegan jokes.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 7:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Meesh

      Troy McClure: Come on, Jimmy. Let’s take a peek at the killing floor. Don’t let the name throw you, Jimmy. It’s not really a floor; it’s more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice through so it can be collected and exported.

      Don’t kid yourself, Jimmy. If that cow ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:41 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   fluffy8u

      Thank you MEESH!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 5:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   lixx

    you don’t make friends with salad

    Jun 22, 2009 at 7:53 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Snippy

      Right. You make friends by tossing someone’s salad.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 7:59 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   lixx

    toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss toss

    Jun 22, 2009 at 8:03 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   No One

    vegan is ok.. but i find allot of them get over worked up when a talk about meat eating comes up, it makes me wonder.. is there a chemical in meat that is only found in meat that makes us humans less aggressive.. after all, our primal urges want to kill and eat what we kill as more of a survival. eating meat from the store is as close as we get, and maybe the meat has something in it that satisfies this urge.. but maybe not.. i asked a vegan why he doesnt eat meat, he replied “because animals are living breathing things to” wich i said “so are plants, they are alive.. and they do breath” to wich the vegan said “but they dont think” wich i properly responded to with “oh, so your only into eating things that are stupid?” some vegans are religious. well, if we werent suppose to eat meat, then why did the “all mighty maker/s” make some animal’s edible? and give us teeth to wich to CUT, SHRED, and PULVERIZE meat so we can digest it? and what do you people do about the vitamins you miss out on by not eating meat? pop vitamin pills every day? well im sorry, but i would prefer to eat a full day’s of meat with veggies on the side, and not have to take extra meds because i have some silly notion that we shouldnt eat the meat that was put on this planet to be eaten.. after all, if we arent going to eat it, some other animal will anyways.. it may be a warm blooded mammal, or maybe insects.. there is also fungus that will in a way eat meat.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 8:41 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Andy

      Pretty much everything in this post is ridiculous…

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:11 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.2   Sue Do Nim

      So wich are you, No One?

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.3   park rose

      No one, there’s a message waiting for you at 14.1 ♥

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:14 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #22.4   GK bang

      So what he’s saying is, I think, that his body is suitable food for vegans.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 9:23 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   kibbles

    I’m dissapointed at all the vegan bashing, can’t you guys grow up? If someone put a vegan flier next to a flyer for a BBQ what would you people do? Flame the vegans, still. Grow up and go eat your damn vegetables.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 8:52 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   Rawr!

      But flaming them is so fun, and so easy. Why, just look at how whiney and self-righteous you are about it. Tell me that level of “You guys are making fun of me! I’m gonna tell mom!” doesn’t make for a perfect target.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 9:18 pm   rating: 35  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   park rose

      I think kibbles is just suggesting some char-grilled eggplant, some jacket potatoes…flaming the vegetables is fucking delectable.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 10:23 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   Bernd das Brot bang

      Mmm, eggplant.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 9:56 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.4   HappyNat

      Topped with bacon, right?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:28 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.5   Bernd das Brot bang

      Yes, and baconnaise.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:32 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.6   mamason bang

      ♫Vegans are just alright with me, vegans are just alright, oh yeah
      Vegans are just alright with me, vegans are just alright

      I dont care what they may eat
      I dont care what they may stew
      I dont care what they may eat

      Vegans are just alright, oh yeah
      vegans are just alright

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:19 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Lara

    Screw you, you suck.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 9:19 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Bunnee

    “That soup I had must have had beef broth in it.” Your system’s kickin back broth? You’re a manly man, aren’t you?”

    Ron White …

    Jun 22, 2009 at 9:46 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Beelzebunnee

    Vegans are weird. You know why they seem to be such judgemental and weird people?

    No ice cream.

    Note: That soy crap does not count as ice cream.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 9:53 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   weeona

      You’ve obviously never had So Delicious.
      It is so much better than dairy ice cream I’d eat it even if I weren’t vegan. Mmmm. Tons of omnis at work love it and a lot of non-vegan customers buy it.

      I’d say vegans seem judgmental and weird because many new vegans are young and hot headed college students that tend to be more vocal. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gotten a lot less ornery. Oh, I’ll still have a good rant, but only to my vegetarian boyfriend or fellow vegan friends. It makes no sense to argue with omnivores. Just gets everyone upset and hurts veganism as a whole.

      Not my thing.

      I prefer to make delicious vegan cookies and win folks over that way. I’ve never had a bad reaction to my goodies, even when dealing with a real pain of a coworker. The worst I get is “these don’t taste vegan.” Which I accept as a backwards compliment. :)

      Jul 6, 2009 at 5:39 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   K

    I was vegetarian/vegan for about ten years so I know all the rhetoric, why they feel the way they feel, etc. I still think it is incredibly irritating how they go about trying to “convert” everyone to their way of life like being a vegan is the new fashionable religion. While I was a vegan I would never have dreamed of trying to force my views on other people or shove those God awful PETA pamphlets under their noses.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 9:55 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   BrookeDiz

      When our younger daughter was a teenager she was an outspoken vegetarian for about three years. Then she met and fell in love with… a guy who hunts!

      We were relieved that we could have tons o’ meat at the wedding feast.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 11:23 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   Beanster bang

    I don’t push my beliefs on other people, but lord knows I am not just going to sit back and not let my voice be heard when our president goes on a murdering rampage against innocent creatures. That is just crossing the line.

    (do vegans kill mosquitos? i mean, they are straight up eating you. if that’s not justification i dont know what is.)

    Jun 22, 2009 at 10:32 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   K. Praslowicz

    This made my day in more ways than one.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 10:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Kim

    You think vegans are annoying, spend some time with raw foodists. Downright cult-ish these folks. They like to talk about how their poo doesn’t smell.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 10:54 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   Drewcifer

      This may be true, but there seems to be far less ‘raw foodists’ than vegans.

      Not to mention I’ve never had a ‘raw foodist’ try to tell me that I was murdering the innocent little strawberry patches.

      *shrugs* Why not just all get along and be omnivores. Like bears.

      Jun 22, 2009 at 11:15 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #30.2   Meesh

      What about those pro-lifers? Talk about self-righteous! They always going on about the murder of innocent babies. When I see pro-life signs on bulletin boards I like to put up my own sign with a fetus on a spit.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:50 am   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #31   leftfoot

    Vegans have the nastiest smelling poop and gas I’ve ever had the displeasure to walk into a bathroom second hand on.

    I’ll take tequila hang over shit smell over regular vegan crap any day.

    Jun 22, 2009 at 11:50 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   fantasy bang

      hhhmmm, all this time I was under the impression that they wore that patchouli in their dreadlocks to keep the smell of the weed they smoke at bay.

      No, it is so they can strut around with that superior attitude of “my shit don’t stink”!

      *They’re just fooling themselves.*

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:21 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   bean

    HAHAHAHHAHAHHA

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Computer Man

    Wow, I love it. It that lettuce eaters!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:45 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   Snippy

      No, it not!!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:56 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #34   Craigslist Search

    Arrrgghhhhh! Absolutelly hilarious ! ;-)
    It looks like you made it to top 3 Diggs for today !

    :-)

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Sesquipedalian

    If God didn’t want us to eat animals, he wouldn’t have made them of meat.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:48 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   fluffy8u

      Nevermind.

      (Take that Mr. “I’m an important member of the grammer and spelling patrol” Snippy!)

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:05 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.2   cheeky

      Don’t you mean “grammer and speling patrol”?

      Jun 24, 2009 at 5:05 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #36   mmmmmm bacon!

    So I have decided that mamason and TheOldSchool are my two most favorite internet ppl of all time!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:05 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   Bernd das Brot bang

      Bacon is my most favorite internet food of all time. That and sow’s stomach and pigs feet. Basically I like to eat the whole pig as long as it comes with loads of sauerkraut.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:16 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.2   ISUCK

      I <3 retarded people too, but i’m not sure mama and tos are the good kind of retarded.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:34 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   Jeff`

    what i don’t get about veganism is them not eating the non meat animal products… You don’t have to kill a Cow for milk , cheese or butter… So why not just be a veg if you care about animals so much… After all we all drank milk as a child and vegans should technically be against that!!!

    That’s makes for an interesting point!!!

    Are all human babies inherently evil because they drink their mothers milk???

    whats the difference then between drinking human milk and cows milk… No one or thing has to die!!!

    Plus my cornflakes would taste shit with soya milk!! and my fry up wouldn’t be nearly as nice without eggs to go along with my bacon and sausages!!!

    MEAT MEAT MEAT!!!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:08 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #37.1   Rawr!

      Cows need to be kept pregnant in order to keep producing milk. With so many extra calves around, some will end up being flat out slaughtered, with others sold or raised for dairy and/or meat, so drinking milk *could* indirectly lead to the death of cows. At least, that’s my understanding of one of the reasons behind the vegan aversion to dairy products.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:36 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.2   Sunder

      Actually, regular milking is enough to keep the udders producing milk.

      Much like a human woman can produce milk long after child birth if she keeps breastfeeding.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:12 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      So, do Vegans breastfeed?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:00 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.4   Bernd das Brot bang

      Yes, but only organic soy milk.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:10 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.5   G

      There was a news story a while ago about a vegan couple who killed their infant because they fed him inadequately.

      http://www.libertypost.org/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=185948

      Jun 23, 2009 at 2:08 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.6   DearJane

      Soy Beans have breasts? :shock:

      Jun 23, 2009 at 3:56 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.7   MeToo

      I thought they were against the constant pulling of the udders. I know I’d be pretty sore if my nipples were yanked all the livelong day.

      Wait…what?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 4:17 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.8   weeona

      Sigh.

      Yes, vegans breastfeed.
      The woman in question is not being exploited in any way, she’s making a choice about what to do with her body. If folks were keeping women pregnant, taking away their babies after birth (and sending the useless boy infants to become veal while keeping the girls to plop back into the milk line) and hooking her up to a machine twice a day to milk her for profit, then I imagine we’d all have issues with that.

      It’s also vegan to have oral sex, before anyone else asks that other old chestnut. As long as everyone involved can consent, there is absolutely no problem with exploitation.

      A cow is being used a means to end against her will. For many vegans, that’s enough. It doesn’t matter that she isn’t immediately killed to get milk, living a life of misery is much worse than death, IMO. Plus, dairy is directly connected to the veal industry, which is also an issue.

      Bottom line, vegans don’t like giving money to folks who exploit animals and treat them like widgets instead of individuals.

      I’m sure some will read this as totally obnoxious but, honestly, I’m just trying to give an honest answer to a really common question while being as polite as possible.

      Jul 6, 2009 at 5:48 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.9   anglophile bang

      weeona, I know you’re trying to be polite, but using loaded phrases like living a life of misery really isn’t helping your cause. I am from an area heavily-populated with dairy farms, and I can tell you, miserable cows are no use to a dairy farmer.

      I grant your point about veal; I’m a little too squeamish to eat it myself. But I eat plenty of steak and hamburger, and a lot of it comes from dairy-breed steers around here. I am perfectly aware of and content with my inconsistency here.

      The biggest issue I have with your comment is that you took a perfectly good joke at 37.3 and answered it with a straight face. This is a humor website, and everyone gets made fun of. Including vegans. And the funny thing about vegans is they seem to think they are the only people to ever struggle with the fact that eating meat kills something. Guess what? Eating a carrot kills something too.

      Jul 6, 2009 at 6:08 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #38   mipsy

    I’m on the vegetarian side. Meat eaters attack vegetarians way too much. You guys come across as douchebags.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:11 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   KatieMB

      *checks off “be a douchebag” on today’s TO DO list*

      Ahhh, it feels so good to accomplish one’s goals.

      Time for breakfast… what shall it be? Bacon and Eggs? Hmmm yesssss…

      Jun 23, 2009 at 6:33 am   rating: 34  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.2   aaa

      I’m vegetarian. And veggievangelism pisses me right the fuck off. As does carnivangelism. People on all sides foist their views on others way too often for their own good. So Team aaa. Because all other humans are douchebags. :D

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:40 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      They all meet once a week to recieve the pamplets and liturature that they will take door to door the rest of the week…they travel in pairs for safety and wear undyed, plain organic fabric clothing to appear more righteous.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:05 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.4   G

      I wasn’t an aggressive carnivore until rude veggies tried to force me to convert to their lifestyle, and insisted that I was a jerk if I ate meat at all.

      I look at it this way: as long as veggies are going to regard me as a jerk just for my meal choices, I may as well make the most of it.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 2:15 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.5   Brian

      preachy, self-centered vegetarians looking down bony noses at regular peoples fare spouting propaganda whenever they can, all the while acting like they own the deed to moral high ground NEVER come across as douchebags.

      Sorry for the run on sentence!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 2:53 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.6   MAMARILLA2 bang

      It starts with a dark closet and a single bowl of rice and ends with a koolaid party.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 3:02 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.7   oi!

      I wasn’t an aggressive carnivore …..

      This forum right here is in process of turning me aggressive herbivore.

      but but I am not going to give up and force my life style on anybody or hate/moke anybody for eating what they like to eat.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 3:09 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   Jill

    You know what, eat whatever you want, and don’t be a jack@ss if someone’s eating something different than you. You don’t have to eat it, so hush! Also, instead of complaining about other people eating, donate so starving people who don’t have the luxury of FOOD, let alone choosing a particular diet, can survive.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:14 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   Canthz_B bang

      What’s a jackatss?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 8:44 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.2   aaa

      I think it’s what happens when P. T. Barnum sews together cat and donkey bits to put on display in a sideshow.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:41 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   oi!

    I am vegetarian and I don’t care what you eat neither should you.

    why do you care? if somebody wants eat meat they will eat if not they won’t. Leave people alone.
    do you think you come here being all smug making jokes about vegan make them eat meat?
    No.
    So stfu.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:37 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #40.1   G

      Why shouldn’t I care what I eat? I put a lot of thought and effort into my meals. Why are you repressing me??

      Jun 23, 2009 at 2:35 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #40.2   GK bang

      Help! Help!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 9:50 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #41   oi!

    war! fight! flaming! chaos! yay!
    My work is done here.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 1:44 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #41.1   DearJane

      oi – the undocumented 6th horseman of the apocolypse

      Jun 23, 2009 at 4:19 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.2   mamason bang

      oi is an illegal alien? 8-O

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:29 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.3   oi!

      damn mama don’t you go declaring that on internet. They will deport me to the darkest corner of the earth.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 12:28 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.4   mamason bang

      sorry

      Jun 24, 2009 at 4:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #41.5   Sirius¤ bang

      They’re deporting people to Utah now? That’s just wrong.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 4:48 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #42   Agent Cooper

    Hey vegans, your whole family is made out of meat, tasty, tasty meat.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 2:52 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   thrall38

    Is that a butterfly on the poster? If that’s on the menu, then I smell an insectivore, not a vegan.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 3:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   stickman

    My favorite thing to do every morning is to see the PAN of the day and read the comments….
    Go Team Carnivore!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 8:35 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   Uncle B

    Me and my buddies are waiting for that special nightfall, when Anarchy breaks out in America! We have turbo-bio-diesel SUV’s with portable renderers in tow, at the ready, and will capture and render fat-assed folk in the lane ways and dark corners, for the fuel we need to plunder and rape the land! The Chinese commies will also have portable renderers attached to their diesel tanks, which will over-run our fair, fat-assed country, and reap the immense supplies of the oil stored in the human factor! Large camps will be initiated for the skinny, and we will force-feed them McBurgers and the like, ’til they are a renderable product! If our methods are successful, we may be able to ship oil to China and the world for a profit! America! The Final Chapter!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 9:39 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #45.1   mamason bang

      Mommy, I don’t like it when Uncle B tells us bedtime stories.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:32 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #46   I Eat Mammals Hearts

    haha! my name is ironic because I don’t eat mammals! or whatever.

    you really don’t even have to make fun of vegans. they’re all living in a hell where everything is serious and the food they eat generally sucks (unless you’re like the one out of a thousand vegans that can actually cook decent tasting food.)

    anyone who makes a support group for their picky eating habits should be mocked, roundly.

    It is kind of interesting though, because when someone decides to not do something (like own a TV, eat meat, not drink, go commando all the time – which is AWESOME, etc) people immediately demand you give them an explanation! you’re different, why? non-stop! I mean, it’s enough that you suck now and are boring, but to have to add to that the constant social pressure of having to tell everyone WHY all the time… well damn, it’s no wonder they go nuts and make little clubs.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 9:46 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #46.1   Sunder

      Naw, most people I know (myself included) only object when we get given dirty looks or told off or yelled at or worse because we choose to be the Omnivores that we are naturally supposed to be.

      I love how Vegans go on about nature, when their very diet is an affront to the nature of our species.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:15 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #47   Lisa

    I’ve never known a vegetarian who will actually state why they won’t eat meat, when asked outright. They always mumble something about “not liking the way it tastes”.

    Do I just know a bunch of coy, evasive vegetarians, or is this a common answer?

    Jun 23, 2009 at 9:49 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #47.1   Sunder

      Mm, some give religion as a reason (I know some Buddhists), others give morals as a reason (and yet seem blithely unaware of the various hypocrisies involved there, such as they’re forced to rely on modern science to subsist healthily… or that they are incredibly rude and sometimes vile in how they treat people who choose to eat meat).

      Some I know are allergic – or suffering from haemachromatosis and the like.

      I’ve heard the taste excuse before as well, which seems a bit weak to me. When I’ve said I don’t like tofu because of the taste I get told I just haven’t had it prepared properly, and yet they get away with the same excuse about meat? No dice!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:19 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.2   Bernd das Brot bang

      That’s weird. Whenever I ask people outright why they won’t eat dog food they mutter something like “that is disgusting” but I think they are just a bunch of coy, evasive dog food haters. Is this a common answer or is it really none of my business?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:28 am   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.3   aaa

      Because I get tired of people asking me when they find out I don’t eat meat (and no, I don’t tell people because they don’t generally need to know). Diet’s like religion. Everyone has strong opinions about how their way of doing things is right and nobody truly gives a flying fuck about why anyone else does what they do. Generally, when I get asked questions about either, the other party is looking to start a fight. :/

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:46 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.4   park rose

      Flexitarian’s the way to go, baby ;)

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:00 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.5   Snippy

      Once you try a Flexitarian, you’ll never go back.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:04 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.6   K.

      I do not like the taste of meat, and it is surprising how many people think I am lying.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 10:24 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.7   park rose

      Maybe it’s because you don’t use contractions? They all think you’re a character out of a Damon Runyon short story, and well, it’s difficult to trust gamblers, hustlers, actors, and gangsters. Particularly if they’re vegetarian.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 8:46 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #47.8   Sean

      Diet is totally a religion. In fact, my best friend starved to death surrounded by food, so strong was his food atheism.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 2:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #48   aaa

    I’m vegetarian. I don’t understand why the fuck anyone would need a support group for their diet. Maybe I’m just not cool enough since I still eat animal products and wear leather. :/

    Jun 23, 2009 at 10:33 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Melissa

    HILLSHIRE FARMS!! GO MEAT!!!

    Yeah…eating meat is part of nature for humans. We’ve been doing it forever – it’s called the circle of life. That’s why we have different kinds of teeth.

    can’t stand vegans.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:07 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   Bernd das Brot bang

      If it’s a circle shouldn’t we be eaten as well? GO BEARS!!!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:15 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #50   GhostWriter bang

    Sign One:
    Smoke-Free?
    Non-smoker or trying to quit?
    Nonjudgmental support and opportunities to connect. Join Now!

    Sign Two:
    Smoker?
    Full-on Tobacco User and Lovin’ It??
    You’ve got no need to connect with ANYBODY!
    KEEP BEIN’ AWESOME!!

    General PAN Consensus:
    “I HATE those Smoke-Free Bastards! Don’t they realize how not-awesome they are?”

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:22 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #50.1   HappyNat

      Smokers don’t need a a place to connect. What do you think they are doing huddled around the ashtray in 10 degree weather?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:39 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #50.2   TheOldSchool

      “If you smoke your meat, you’re doing it too fast. ”

      *rim-shot*

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:51 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #50.3   Snippy

      Rimming has health risks — or perhaps pitfalls.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #51   Jen

    SO much meat-pride. Let me tell you this, though…one day the human race will look back on your barbaric eating practices with shame the way we look back at the holocaust now, not just because of the egotistical ways in which we treat animals, but for how STUPID we were for killing ourselves and our children with our forks even though modern nutritional science has proven that we shouldn’t be eating animal products. But long before that happens your mother or your sister or your best friend will die of breast cancer or liver cancer or heart disease and it will be because of the animal “foods” they eat. When you’re looking at their dying face and trying to hold back tears remember your attitude towards people who tried to share the knowledge about plant-based foods with you and how you chided them. Will you be a smart ass then, too? Your views on food are very unevolved, people.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:25 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #51.1   Lisa

      Oh, well in that case I’ll become a vegetarian and live forever!!! Yeah!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:49 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.2   MAMARILLA2 bang

      You can acomplish the same thing by letting the vampire turn you…Then you too can watch as you outlive all you love and become filled with remorse and angst, never gettingto see the sunlight again or allowing yourself to become close to a mortal. You will revel in the darkness, not only of the night but that which is in your very soul-less body…tragic.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 11:55 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.3   GhostWriter bang

      You can eat as much meat as you want, and you won’t die as long as you stay active. My 95 year old grandpa keeps on dancin’, and he’s still alive.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:26 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.4   thirty six red

      Typical. Meh.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.5   HappyNat

      Jen, I’m going out to grab a chilli dog. Can I grab you one?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:42 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.6   thirty six red

      I was chided and I am very “unevolved” For the love God make it stop! I just can’t take it. The tears! I’ve been asshole raped by a vegan.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:49 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.7   James

      hi my sister/mother/and grand mother all died of breast cancer and guess what they were all ALL vegan and because of that the doctor said they couldnt stand up to the treatment something about not getting enuff from just eating fruit vegs and grains. so tell me somewere that it is healthy and i will show you a unreliable source. be veagan if you want but if you get sick put that aside for nutrition.
      if i seem smug no that i did try to hold back tears because some ones did not listen to something that might have saved their life.
      SUK IT

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:23 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.8   Phalange

      Oh Zeus. You seriously did not just compare eating animals to the Holocaust. Wait, yes you did.

      Seriously, who would want to live 150 years if they couldn’t eat steak?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:27 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.9   GhostWriter bang

      James- were they dancers?

      Because I have a very healthy 92 year old Grandmother who likes to dance and sing some, too.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.10   MeToo

      One day the human race will look back on…wait, what? What’s that, you say? Humans have been eating meat for how long?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 4:25 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.11   KatieMB

      Eating meat causes breast cancer? WHO KNEW? Um, not all the experts on the topic. Yeah like all the research on breast cancer clearly shows the connection, as well as all the recommendations on how to avoid breast cancer tell you to not eat meat. Um Yeah.

      Is that like don’t use antiperspirant, coz that cause cancer too?

      Oh how evolved I am now! Thanks!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 4:36 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.12   thirty six red

      OK I am going to just let it slide this time cause everbody funny now…but next time someone mentions my dying relatives I am GOING OFF COMPLETELY. DO YOU HEAR ME? I AM GOING F’ING OFF!!!! I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU EAT .EAT THIS YOU OLD DEAD BASTARDS!

      Sorry got a lil’ carried away So we’ll just call it a draw this time alright?

      PS I think that sums up my feelings in general sort of way

      Jun 23, 2009 at 4:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.13   What?

      Alright…Honestly…Jen. It’s people like you that make the rest of us hate Vegans and vegetarians so much. You don’t like meat? That’s great, you can have your opinion, just don’t push it on other people and insult them for not having the same one you do. Also, you’re saying that meat causes cancer, right? What doesn’t? Should we stay indoors for the rest of our lives because the sun causes cancer? Should we refrain from drinking diet pop (if you like that sort of thing, I don’t) because it causes cancer? I don’t think so. I happen to LIKE taking long strolls through my neighborhood in the gleaming sunlight while eating a nice burger from McDonald’s and an occasional Diet Coke thank you very much. Oh and, how can someone’s views on FOOD be unevolved? Food is food, you eat it, you enjoy it. Dig in.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 4:30 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.14   MeToo

      Hey, at least we cook it now…yay, evolution!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 10:44 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.15   mamason bang

      ♫Dance, dance, dance.

      Dance, dance, dance,

      all night long.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:44 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #51.16   Sean

      I consider your comparison of dead jews and meat products extremely antisemetic. I can totally relate with vegans when because this morning I stubbed my toe and it was the exact same thing as the holocaust and I am not exagerrating.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 2:11 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #52   androidny

    Ummm… *ahem* Shouldn’t the carnivores’ mascot not be represented by an extinct species? Seems a little ironic, don’tcha think?…

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:35 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #52.1   Big Scott

      Nah… it’s the perfect point.

      I’m sure T-Rex ribs would’ve been great with hot sauce!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 12:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #52.2   mamason bang

      I think it’s illustating the theory that dinosaurs became extinct because the herbivores convinced the meat-eaters to go strictly vegan. Without the “meaties” effectively culling the herd, overpopulation began a downward spiral that ultimately led to the complete distruction of the dinos, which had been thriving for millions of years. The moral of the story… the vegan life style will destroy all of mankind if left unchecked. Now eat your steak!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:53 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #52.3   mamason bang

      …or destruction.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 5:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #52.4   oi!

      aye aye mamason.
      I liked your theory. Now I am totally into cannibalism. Earth is overpopualted(by humans) anyway. Dr. Hannibal is my new hero. I wonder if humans are microwaveable. I am not that much into cooking.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 7:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #52.5   Sirius¤ bang

      I don’t need any cooking, oi! It’s all in the sauce.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 4:52 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #53   Hungry

    Part of our nature to eat meat? I don’t have the slicy pointy teeth. Does that mean I shouldn’t eat meat? Because when it’s cooked it doesn’t generally need to be “ripped” by my teeth.

    Anyway, I know some nice vegans who can cook really well and aren’t humourless. But I know some who are self-righteous morons too. But I couldn’t do without cheese. What kind of life is that?

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:55 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #53.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      It is the self righteous morons in all walks of life that spoil it for the rest of us.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:06 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.2   TheOldSchool

      Mamarilla2, THANK GOD! I am so glad that you said what you said. We’ve all been taking shit from self-righteous morons for far too long.

      NO MORE! Let the revolt begin!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:17 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Of course, so you will be leading the fray? Thus the revolution begins, Self righteous genius will prevail at last.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.4   TheOldSchool

      Let’s not use the g-word.

      It has been SO cheapened.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:40 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #53.5   MAMARILLA2 bang

      How about..pseudo-intellectual?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #54   SickBastard

    You know what the only part of a vegetable you can’t eat is?

    The chair.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:57 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #54.1   TheOldSchool

      SB,

      You’re technically right, but people can still drink from the springs that are located in the chair’s back and seat supports.

      There’s not a lot of drinkable water in these springs; that’s true. Yet, just those few glistening droplets of springwater may provide enough sustenance so that we might be able to at least cling to life until a bleary-eyed winter finally releases us from its icy strangle-hold and then grudgingly staggers away, still half-drunk, leaving a merciful opening for spring’s blessed return.

      We didn’t eat the chair, but we drank it. And it saved our lives.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:31 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #55   Lisa

    Sorry, Bernd das Brot– didn’t realize that dietary philosophy is a super-secret, super-sensitive subject, inappropriate for casual conversation.

    Tell me, why is the subject so taboo? (Or, is that too nobody’s business?)

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      The first rule of dietary philosophy is we don’t talk about dietary philosophy.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:35 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.2   Bernd das Brot bang

      Lisa, big misunderstanding! I simply didn’t realize that what is missing most in my life is some sort of philosophy to make it through dinner. So, please, let’s have a casual conversation about food. I’ll start by asking you outright: Why do you not like dog food? (And I won’t take “taste” for an answer.)

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.3   GK bang

      I don’t know if I don’t like it specifically, as I’ve never tried it. It’s designed specifically for dogs, though, so I prefer to leave it to them. I’ve no objection to sharing a meal of non-dog-specific food with them, though I do draw the line at letting them drool on any bits I’m eating.

      Really it just seems rude. We go to all the bother of inventing food for them, and then go “Oh, we’re going to help ourselves to some as well, by the way.”? This is how revolutions start!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 10:44 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.4   Bernd das Brot bang

      So there you have it, Lisa. The real reason vegetarians don’t eat meat is because they don’t want non-vegetarians to start a revolution!

      Jun 24, 2009 at 1:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #55.5   GK bang

      Obvious when you think about it, really. Honestly Lisa, a bit of effort in your philosophy would be appreciated!

      Jun 30, 2009 at 6:07 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #56   Bill

    I don’t know about the rest of you, but I have front teeth that rip and tear and seem to be meant to chew more than just asparagus and peaches. I find they often need to be sharpened on some kind of bone, usually one from an animal larger than a chipmunk or cute bunny. Besides, what would I do with all this gravy I’ve made?

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:42 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #56.1   TheOldSchool

      Bill, enough with the sinful boastin’. You know full well that the rest of us ain’t hardly got no teeth, whatsoever.

      Gravy?

      Jun 23, 2009 at 12:58 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.2   Snippy

      That’s not gravy.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:08 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #56.3   Hungry

      I haven’t got those teeth. No ripping animal flesh for me.

      I drink the gravy from the boat, or spill it due to the lightheadedness I always have from a meat free diet.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:42 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #57   Danyell

    I haven’t eaten meat in about 8 years. I didn’t need a support group. I just…stopped…eating…it.

    Though I think being hateful towards anyone for what they eat (or don’t eat) is effing retarded. So everyone needs to dry their eyes and have some cool down time. Then maybe you can learn how to play nice with others.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 12:53 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #57.1   GhostWriter bang

      “I…just…stopped…eating…it….”

      Well, from the looks of it, it really slowed down your verbal processes. You’re probably lacking in Arginine Pyroglutamate intake.

      I prescribe one DoubleCheckerBurger every two days, until you’re rappin’ like Bizzy Bone.

      Jun 23, 2009 at 1:13 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #58   robb

    this is epic win !!!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 2:54 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   Becky

    The person who wrote the sign on the right is truly awesome.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 2:59 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   Jeff

    According to my very reliable sources (wiki) a lot of vegans east Honey…But thats an animal product… Don’t they realise those bees work hard all day to make that>>>THOSE BASTARDS!!!

    I fancy a nice bowl of honey nut cornflakes now with lots of full cream milk!!! Oh the inhumanity!!!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 4:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #60.1   Snippy

      What about vegans west?

      What about Las Vegans?

      What about Chevy Vegas?

      What about Chevy Chase?

      And don’t call me “Honey”!

      Jun 23, 2009 at 5:14 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #60.2   GK bang

      I assume you’re referring to Wikipedia, as the original Wiki is unlikely to be taking an interest in such matters anytime soon. Good grief, I hate it when people do this.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 10:52 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #60.3   Beanster bang

      i don’t eat honey because it exploits the bees…

      on the other hand, honey is the only food that doesn’t kill anything to be eaten.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 1:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #60.4   BillyD

      “on the other hand, honey is the only food that doesn’t kill anything to be eaten.”

      Huh?

      Jun 24, 2009 at 11:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #61   iNck

    We are all omnivores by nature and most of us are omnivores by habit, too. A carnivore is a type of animal, one that eats only meat. We meekly call ourselves carnivores as opposed to vegetarians when we really mean we are omnivores, not perverse faddy eaters who want to assert their peculiar habits on the rest of us.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 6:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   Jason

    Well i must say I did get a veggy pocket for lunch and it was great but I can’t beat an afternoon in my tree stand.

    Jun 23, 2009 at 8:40 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   Bitty

    #51 Jen.
    You remind me of a crazed opinionated religious fiend. You’re one of those people no one wants to get stuck with at a party aren’t you?
    I get the feeling you have evolved yourself out of many a relationship!

    Jun 23, 2009 at 11:40 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   Lisa

    I’ve never made the grand, radical decision to never eat dog food– how presumptuous of you. If faced with hunger, I’d eat it.

    My theory is that young people who experiment with Vegetarianism do so because A) it gives them a certain distinct ‘identity’ (such as it is), B) it’s a radical stand (and youngins love the notion of radicalism), and C) it’s non-bourgeois (thereby distinguishing themselves from their hateful middle class parents).

    Voila– casual conversation about food and fashion.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #64.1   glastonberry

      ” and C) it’s non-bourgeois (thereby distinguishing themselves from their hateful middle class parents).”

      But there’s where you’re wrong – veganism is completely bourgeois – only those with a comfortable, privileged upbringing can ever have the option to be a vegan.

      It’s non-conformist in a conformist way as South Park so cannily observed about goth kids.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 8:46 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #64.2   MAMARILLA2 bang

      No joke…just try to buy enough to feed 4 with $100 for the week. You are not buying Soy burgers and tofu created meats. You end up with ‘parts’ and heavy fat ground beef…and a lot of potatoes and noodles.

      Jun 26, 2009 at 12:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #65   Kaaaatttt

    when i was younger i went to a sleep away camp and one of the boys cabins was filled with hard core meat eaters… their motto was the bloodier the better. well the catch is that there was one vegan kid in that cabin so at the end of the week there is a bon fire for all the cabins and each cabin makes a cheer, the bouys thought it would be fuuny to make pick on the vegan kid so their song was (and i dont know why i remember this)

    “save a plant eat a cow
    i want meat i want it now
    im gonna eat it cuz its dead
    im gonna eat it cuz its red
    maybe i could eat it raw
    let the blood drip down my jaw”

    well thankfully the vegan kid had a good sense of humor.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 3:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #65.1   mamason bang

      This one time, at band camp…

      Jun 24, 2009 at 12:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #66   Rei

    Why does everyone hate vegeterians and vegans so much?
    I’ve been vegeterian for like two years and people will chat away with me for ages until they find out I’m veggie and freak out. Srsly. I don’t care wtf you eat so why should you care what I eat?
    It’s very stupid.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 12:07 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #66.1   aaa

      Well, I have a hatred for all of humanity, so it’s only natural that I hate you. Nothing personal.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 12:18 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #67   The Beautiful Kind

    YAWN. Lame.

    Humans are not carnivores. But they sure can be selfish greedy bastards with zero empathy!

    Jun 24, 2009 at 3:32 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #68   N.L.

    My friend has recently jumped on the vegetarian bandwagon, and has been yapping about “clean food” like I’m supposed to be impressed that she has the same diet I feed to my rabbit or something.

    I would love to send her this gem :D

    Jun 24, 2009 at 4:44 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #69   So anonymous in the Cbus

    Holy cow. This excites the crap out of me because I live in Columbus (altho alas do not work for this particular mega corp) and have also been vegetarian for 13 years and am passingly aware of this group altho I only know one or two people in it.

    And by the by, not all veggies are humorless hectoring wimps so suck on that carnies.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 5:24 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #69.1   Snippy

      Perhaps if you didn’t gorge on all those vegetables, you wouldn’t crap yourself every time you get excited.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 5:27 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #69.2   Moogoo Gai Pan

      you might need ot think up a new nickname for carnivore..as “carnie” is already taken for carnival folk ^_^

      Jun 25, 2009 at 10:30 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #69.3   So anonymous in the Cbus

      I thought all meat eaters can also operate a ferris wheel and bang Sherilynn Fenn, no?

      (tell me I’m not the only one here who has seen Two Moon Junction.)

      Jun 25, 2009 at 11:15 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #70   Snippy

    Nothing to see here but the sad remnants of a gigglebrax failure. Move along now.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 5:26 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #71   xs

    the workmanship on that PAN is incredible… carnivores are so clever : )

    Jun 24, 2009 at 6:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #72   Robert

    Thanks for sharing the funny. Reposted at http://iamhilarious.com/soyfckers-anonymous/

    Jun 24, 2009 at 7:34 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   ken

    lot like a bunch of veggies frown togther an tossed about. Which sounds a lot like a sa lad And hat would make you rabbid food. Rabbits are not caravans even if they have hot bunny beans (so I’ve read). But they are carnival ivore foster. And that is about that

    Jun 24, 2009 at 7:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #73.1   glastonberry

      ken, I think you’re having a stroke.

      Jun 24, 2009 at 8:51 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #73.2   So anonymous in the Cbus

      And hat would make you rabbid food

      What. the. fuck. Clearly your meat eating diet has caused dementia Ken. Thank you vegetables.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 10:18 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #73.3   Moogoo Gai Pan

      Actually when the mother bunny has her litter, she EATS the weakest ones..they are omnivores, heavily leaning towards veggies…hte meat portion is mostly bugs of various kinds which is considered meat , albeit very small.

      Back in my childhood I witnessed such an eating with my sisters bunny, she ate two of her litter..it real shocked us..but later read that it is a way to “weed” out the weakest and prvide fast nutrition after such a traumatic amount of birthing

      we were told by breeders this is normal behavior for rabbits in the wild and that unless you take active care to watch and prevent it, it will happen . Thats nature for ya… It doesn’t do things based on EGO lmao

      Jun 25, 2009 at 10:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #74   kman

    i just stumbled this and boy, did it make my day.

    silly vegans.

    Jun 24, 2009 at 9:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #75   Sean

    Aww, god love ya. Veganism is a fad and not the end to world hunger. Let’s figure out the whole issue with getting everyone in the world a meal, before we tell them what they CAN’T eat, ok? Veganism is somewhere between a religious rite and a middle class indulgence, but neither is a solution to anything other than “How can one piss off rich parents, make me vaguely edgy AND have vile flatuence at once?”

    Jun 24, 2009 at 10:22 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #75.1   GK bang

      Considering your final point, it’s really rather surprising that more teenage boys don’t take up the practice.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 6:20 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #76   momjob

    I found it quite funny that at one point I was boning a vegan for awhile. She wouldn’t eat meat, but, she sure would eat my trouser meat… and it’s juices. Seems pretty hypocritical if you ask me.

    Jun 25, 2009 at 4:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #76.1   LA Doc

      OK, that was almost as funny as the picture of the bulletin board. LMAO. How could you even stand to be in the same room as some shrill, estrogen-driven, bimbo vegan? Did you have a gag in her mouth and a bag over her head?

      Jun 25, 2009 at 11:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #77   Moogoo Gai Pan

    I’m not sure why one has to choose sides here. I mean our TEETH show that we are omnivores, as are all other primates. No matter what stats you wish to fling at one another (hehe, fling) we do need the proteins of BOTH to maintain a proper diet. Balance is key in all things, especially food. One doesn’t have to go all extreme to one way or the other to enjoy a healthy and guiltless life. Anyone who thinks eating meat is bad, really doesn’t have all the info at hand. Or if they choose not to eat meat because of cruelty…well I say nature IS cruel.

    That’s just how it is. If there were some other beings above us in the food chain, I’d doubt they’d be hesitating to eat us just because we could talk and think and stuff. lol

    But really, why do we human beings have to over-complicate something simple like this? For something to do? lol I say if it tastes good, then eat it! If you want to put some thought into it, then make it a balanced meal. Just my two cents.

    Jun 25, 2009 at 5:23 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #77.1   Ping Pong

      It’s a matter of personal preference and personal morality. Vegetarianism isn’t a genetic thing, it’s a learned thing.

      Some Vegetarians and Vegans prefer the life style because they believe the human mouth and digestive system wasn’t meant to devour meats.

      Don’t get me wrong, I’m as big a meat eater as the next guy.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 11:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #77.2   Sirius¤ bang

      Yeah, I’d heard that about you.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 4:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #78   Cannibal

    You know what else is funny? Starving children, brutal rapes, birth defects, and so-called tragedies. Yesterday I saw someone get killed in a car accident and I am still laughing today. And it doesn’t take a lot of work to enjoy the humor of suffering with other people with a similar sense of humor as me. I have loads of friends who enjoy jokes about suffering.

    To make our non-sociopathic friends real mad we exhibit pictures of starvation, severed heads and what not. They get so upset. How judgmental to try to force “compassion” on those of us who just get a good laugh out of other people’s pain.

    Hahahahahahahaha. Still thinking about the death I saw yesterday. So much blood.

    Jun 25, 2009 at 4:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #78.1   mamason bang

      Starving children and brutal rapes are not funny at all. Dirty, poorly nurished hill-billy children are outrageously funny. Rape is only funny sometimes and I can’t define when but I know a funny rape when I see one. Birth defects can be funny depending on the type of defect but some are just gross. So-called tragedies are hilarious because they are so-called when in fact they are not actual tragedies. Actual tragedies can be funny too, but usually it takes a little time for the humor to become apparent. Forced compassion is almost as funny as some rape. I mostly get a good laugh from my own pain. Cope much?

      Jun 25, 2009 at 4:37 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #78.2   Name

      I think the funniest thing about car accidents and rape and stuff is other people’s reaction to it. They’re all like “aaah that is so terrible it’s a bloody dead person! *sob sob* the horror!” And you’re all like “lol it’s just a dead person haha look at you crying about a dead person like an idiot.”

      Or their like “Rape is terrible because it violates people and makes their life worse so it is our duty…” and you’re all like “hehe. she said ‘duty.’

      Lol mamason some examples of funny rapes are ones including any of the following:
      Rapist has tiny wiener
      Either one starts crying
      Either one makes funny expressions
      and so on – i won’t bother to make a longer list.

      Oh and I’ve noticed a lot of comments that go something like “I don’t get why people would care about what other people eat.” The reason vegans/vegetarians care about what others eat is because they care about animals or whatever and don’t like it when people do things that they think harms animals or whatever. duh.

      Of course this argument is stupid cuz all animals are is a bunch of molecules and all their pain and suffering is is a bunch of synapses so why should that matter at all.

      And the answer to the question “what separates humans from animals” is nothing. So the whole pain thing goes both ways. Human pain is nothing either….. which is why the reactions people have to it is funny.

      (see how I wrapped everything up by tying the whole argument back to my original statement? that was some vintage english class shit there.)

      Jun 27, 2009 at 1:57 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #78.3   park rose

      Ive been through the desert on a horse with (no) name
      It felt good to be out of the rain
      In the desert you can remember (your) name
      cause there aint no one for to give you no pain
      La, la …

      Thanks for that, name! Those lyrics always stumped me, but your vintage english class shit helped me see the light. Keep up the good work.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:36 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #78.4   park rose

      Vintage English class shit is of course far superior than that deposited in a desert by a horse with no name.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:38 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #78.5   Name

      Easier cleanup.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:46 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #79   Cannibal

    We need to all hang out and torture each others pets. That will show those silly vegans!

    Jun 25, 2009 at 5:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #79.1   Sirius¤ bang

      Sarcastic outrage: you’re doin’ it wrong.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 5:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #79.2   Sirius¤ bang

      The management would like to assure you that no animals will be harmed in the licking of my taint.

      Jun 25, 2009 at 5:19 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #79.3   park rose

      taint nothing wrong with your taint, Sirius-star.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:39 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #80   Danyell

    I was just wondering if the people who hate vegetarians would get just as outraged if someone said they didn’t eat bread.

    Just curious if it’s a particular food group thing, or just anger at people who choose different lifestyles.

    Jun 25, 2009 at 9:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #80.1   park rose

      Yep, coeliacs have it hard, too. In fact, veganism is so last half of this decade that I’m surprised there haven’t been more hate-on-the-coeliac notes posted.

      Those on the candida free diet, too. Bring ‘em on. (It sucks being on the candida free diet – no magic mushrooms).

      If more notes like that were posted it certainly would flour people.

      Just trying to sate your curiosity; there’s have always been reactions to whether you eat your bread leavened or unleavened at certain times of the year. It’s a food choice that has caused a bit of ruckus throughout history every now and then.

      Actually, I think two of the five major sources of nutrition, particularly on PAN are outrageous and righteous indignation. Under these umbrellas come all the little offshoots, such as outlined by Sirius above – sarcastic outrage, and my own specialty – up your own arse pomposity.

      So, I’ll put it to the vote, but I think the answer to your question is a) it’s a particular food group thing, and I’m placing myself in with the mollusks and the other bottom feeders – protein or fish, I guess that’d be (brain food).

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.2   park rose

      The edit function is screwed.
      there’s have always been
      there have always been.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:29 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.3   Dave

      Looking at the comments it is strange that the meat eaters seem to be getting offended by people who choose not to eat meat, not the other way around.

      It is as if there is something deep in the psyche that knows that eating meat requires that the source of the meat be killed, and killing is something that we are taught is wrong from a very early age.

      Maybe the offended response from the meat eaters is a “go on the attack” style defense against knowing they are in the wrong.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 2:57 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.4   GK bang

      No, it’s just a reaction to years of posturing vegans from elsewhere*. Commenters did have lives before arriving at this post, you know.

      And I don’t know where you grew up, but around here we were not taught that killing is wrong. We were taught that murder — killing people — is wrong. I was taught that killing animals was a source of tasty meats.

      (*well, and also a little bit because you always rise so beautifully to being baited)

      Jun 30, 2009 at 6:26 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.5   Name

      Actually, Dave, they get pissed off when stupid animal lovers write “I am superior”-like comments when they are clearly inferior tools.
      They try to show them how stupid they are, or they mess with them for fun.

      “Something deep in the psyche that knows that eating meat requires that the source of the meat be killed.” REALLY!!???!! I’ll never eat meat again!! I didn’t realize that they had to KILL the animals to eat them!!!! THAT’S TERRIBLE!!! If only I had known sooner, I wouldn’t have killed all those helpless animals!!

      You don’t even really have to kill them, though. You could cut off a pig’s leg and cook it and eat it. You could even feed it to the pig you took it from.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 5:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.6   Dave

      “Actually, Dave, they get pissed off when stupid animal lovers write “I am superior””

      Incorrect assumption about why I don’t eat meat. It has nothing to do with loving animals or the cruelty of killing them. If you do some research on the environmental impact of the meat industry you might understand (not necessarily agree with) my choice.

      It is interesting that you read my comment as me saying “I am superior”. I was commenting on the feelings the meat eaters must be having in order to prompt them to attack people who have different dietary choices.

      Jul 1, 2009 at 3:07 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.7   HappyNat

      “It is as if there is something deep in the psyche that knows that eating meat requires that the source of the meat be killed, and killing is something that we are taught is wrong from a very early age.”

      Good fucking point, Dave. I’m sure cavemen were taught not to kill things they just looked for animals that had already died and ate them.

      Actually, looking at history it seems like humans have gone out of their way to try and kill anything they could for food, territory, religion, color of skin, you name it. Humans are after all just animals and we do what we need to do to survive and/or make our life better. We are self centered assholes, so maybe we don’t hate vegans/veggies we just hate when someone talks bullshit about “something deep in the psyche”.

      Jul 1, 2009 at 7:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.8   Name

      It’s “I am superior”-like. Get it straight.
      It’s the whole looking-down-your-nose at them thing. Snobby comments like you’re trying to figure out how their stupid little brains don’t think the right way – “It is as if there is something deep in the psyche that knows that eating meat requires that the source of the meat be killed” and “Maybe the offended response from the meat eaters is a “go on the attack” style defense against knowing they are in the wrong.”

      Incorrect use of the word “impact.” “Impact” is not a noun. It is a verb. So “environmental ‘impact’” is wrong. A better sentence would be “If you did any research on how the meat industry affects the environment blah blah blah *bitch* and *whine*.”

      Haha so you’re an environment hugger. Fag. I’m not sure, but you are probably talking about how the meat industry affects the ecosystem. Or how cows farting causes a lot of pollution. Whatever – don’t care. The reason I thought you were an animal lover is because you went on about how killing is wrong and how it is deep in our psyches etc…

      HappyNat – people didn’t kill others because of the color of their skin, they killed them because of race. The color of one’s skin is a great way to define race.
      It wasn’t just because of skin color.

      Jul 1, 2009 at 11:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #80.9   Dave

      Now you are just getting idiotic in your responses. Now I am a fag because I don’t eat meat.

      And resorting to using a caveman as a model of ethical behaviour is bizarre. I presume it is some kind of reference to evolutionary psychology. If that is so, we have moved on a bit as a society since we lived in caves and a lot of our value system is a result of socialisation, not instincts.

      Anyway, I asked a friend why he thought some meat eaters were so offended by vegetarians not eating meat that they felt the need to attack that choice. He said something more plausible than my theory.

      His take on it is that meat eaters see the vegetarians choice to not eat meat as an implied criticism of their choice to eat meat. The vegetarian need do nothing more than not eat meat for the meat eater to feel they have been looked down upon, so they respond to the imagined criticism by attacking that choice.

      If you don’t agree with that, please enlighten me. Why do you get so offended by our choice to not eat meat that you feel the need to attack us?

      Jul 1, 2009 at 7:54 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #81   Dr. Long Balls

    I’m a veg. I think it’s pretty funny.

    Seriously…could you do any more harm to our stereotype than by promoting a support group for vegans?

    Come on people. We just don’t eat meat. We’re not victims of an airplane crash.

    Who ever printed that shit sort of served that one on a plate for the carnivore humor (no pun intended…er, yes…pun intended).

    Jun 26, 2009 at 11:19 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #81.1   Name

      Actually, we DO eat meat. I think you’re getting it wrong.

      It’s a common misconception among idiots. Don’t worry about it.

      Also… victims of airplane crashes = dead. They really don’t eat much… so…

      Jun 27, 2009 at 3:52 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.2   Canthz_B bang

      Actually, survivors of airplane crashes are victims of the crash as well. They tend to reacquire their appetites after a while.

      Jun 27, 2009 at 8:03 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.3   Name

      Usually they all die when the fuel blows up.
      In the hudson river crash, all of them lived. But then they aren’t really victims. None of them even got hurt. They’re more like… participants? Victim of a plane crash is like victim of a homicide.
      And usually, where it crashes is very well known, and usually it’s in a country, so the survivors can just hitch a ride to the hospital, or if they are unhurt they can just go to the nearest macdonalds and get a mac-whatever. If he’s thinking about Lost, that doesn’t really actually happen.
      I don’t actually watch Lost. It is a plane crash that gets them stranded on an island, right? How gay is that?

      Jun 28, 2009 at 2:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.4   Canthz_B bang

      Actually, you have a 53% chance of surviving a plane crash, if you keep your head (thanks, Google).
      “Victim” is like “casualty”. Not all victims die, nor do all casualties. You can be a victim of a crime and not die, no?
      A victim is one that is acted on and usually adversely affected by a force or agent, (s)he need not die in order to be a victim…or are all rape victims dead?

      Learn the nuances of words…that’s why we have so many of them.

      Jun 28, 2009 at 3:51 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.5   Canthz_B bang

      Oh, and the fuel does not “blow up”, it catches fire. Jet fuel is inflammable, not explosive.
      If you fill a tightly closed paper cup with carbonated water and shake it vigorously, it will “explode”, but there will be no flames. Explosions, while often accompanied by flames, need not include them.
      Jet fuel does not explode it catches fire, which sometimes causes an explosion of the fuel tanks, the wings or even the entire plane, but not every fuel fire results in an “explosion”.

      Words.

      Jun 28, 2009 at 4:01 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.6   Name

      When a plane crashes and all of the fuel catches fire, the entire plane is consumed in flames. If the fuel exploded, the entire plane would still be consumed in flames. The difference is irrelevant.
      It is possible that your chances of surviving a plane crash is 53%. I didn’t find your source, but I did see that more that half the victims of plane crashes survived. Sure, if you count landing gear failures or pathetic little things like that.
      You say “if you keep your head,” but what are the chances that any random person would keep its head during a crash?
      “are all rape victims dead?” No. But all of them have definitely been raped.
      Victims of plane crashes ARE like casualties of war. They have either been injured or pwnt. “Victims” of a landing gear-less landing haven’t been injured, or if they have it was not nearly severe enough to get them out of combat. In plane crashes, there really aren’t non-fatal injuries, though. Basically, if you are involved in a plane crash, you are going to get pwnt.
      The definition of “victim” is irrelevant. The definition of a victim of a plane crash is “somebody who was on a plane or underneath the plane when it crashed”

      You wanna count the chances that a “victim” of a plane crash survives? WELL, the definition says that victims are “usually adversely affected” by something. So we can count everybody who was affected at all, because being “adversely” affected is not required to achieve “victim” status. And in order to be killed by something, you have to have been killed by it. Being affected by it and then dying as a result doesn’t count. To get killed by a crash, you have to die in it.
      SO, we can start with the number of people “affected” that are killed in the crash, then we divide that by the total number of people affected (victims of things are ones “affected” by it).
      NOW, you would probably say that that ratio is 53:100, but is it really? Maybe 53 out of 100 people on the plane when it crashes die, but when a plane with 100 passengers crashes, more than 100 people are affected. You see, plane crashes are considered scary stuff. They really put things into perspective. Say that on a flight of 98 people with a pilot and a co-pilot, 53 die when it crashes. 53:100. Lets say that on average, 50 family members and friends hear about the crash per each passenger, because of the crash.
      Each person hears the news and thinks “Wow, that’s scary, and really puts things into perspective for me. I should value life more now, because you could lose it just like that *snap*!” or “That’s scary! I’m never going to fly again!” or “Goddamnit! Now I don’t have a dad.” You see, per each passenger, 50 other people hear about it and are affected. Therefore, they are all victims. None of the friends or family members of the 100 that were passengers on the plane are killed by the crash.
      53 die out of 100 passengers, and 50 people are affected per 100. 50×100=5,000, + the original 100 passengers on the plane. If you are a victim of a plane, crash your chances of surviving are 53 in 5,100.
      But it doesn’t end there. Six of the 5,047 (5,100 affected – 53 that were pwnt) that survived the crash happen to be couples. Three couples. They are each drawn together by the mutual fact that they have both been affected by the crash. They need each other. They have sexy tiem. All of the girls of the three couples were so affected by the crash that they forgot to take the pill. 1 in 3 unprotected sexy tiems result in babby. One babby formed.
      That babby was very affected by that plane crash. He was formed as a result of it. 1 babby+5,100 affected so far=5,101 affected. He was so sweet and thoughtful that he affected every single person he became acquainted with over the course of his life. 1000 people became acquainted with him. 1000 more people affected by the plane crash. 1000+5,101=6,101.
      One of the 6,048 that were victims that survived (6,101-53 that were pwnt) was a kid. He lost his dad in the crash. His mother died two weeks later of greif, but she wasn’t killed in the crash, so she is still a survivor. This kid has a lot of anger for the world now. He’s only 15, and life is starting to get really hard for him. He buys a knife. He gets in a fight. He stabs the kid in the eye. All of the people that knew both kids (600 people at that point, each kid knew 300) were affected. 600 more people affected by the plane crash + the dead kid who was also affected = 601 more people on our count. 6,101+601=6,702 people affected so far. 53 were killed by the crash out of 6,702 victims. So far, the percent of victims that survived that plane crash 6,702-53 that die in the crash / 6,702 x 100 (to get the percent) 6,649 survivors/6,702 victims x 100 is about 99.21 percent. But we’re not done counting.
      In fact, we will never finish counting. After about 1000 years, I figure, the entire population of humans will have been affected. Since the entire population has been affected by that plane crash, they are all victims of it. From then on, every new person will become a victim. I’ll go ahead and predict that humankind will never completely eradicate themselves, and will divert any huge meteors that come our way, and and sort of “judgment day” prediction is complete bull, so the number of victims of the plane crash will extend to infinity. 53 people killed/infinity x100 = 0% of the victims are killed by the crash. 100 percent of the victims of the crash were not killed by it.

      Or you could do what I did. Victims of a plane crash are ones that are injured or killed by it, and since practically all injuries are fatal, Victim of plane crash=dead.

      Words, right?

      Are they your tools, or are you the tool? I think you’re the tool. Tool.
      Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool Tool.

      Tool.

      Wow how bored am I? Kudos if you read that.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 12:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.7   GK bang

      I have built a little wall out of empty drink cans, therefore your argument is irrelevant.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 6:30 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.8   Name

      Oh… Bummer…

      I wish you had told me that Before I wrote all that.

      Jun 30, 2009 at 6:02 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #81.9   oi bang

      no kudos to me. I did not read it.
      Name, when did you pass the bar?
      (That is a rhetorical question)

      Jul 2, 2009 at 4:24 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #82   April

    Too bad none of them has realized that regular-type human beings are actually omnivores. I’d post an omnivore sign.

    Jun 27, 2009 at 6:10 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #83   Alaska Gal

    That’s a funny photo. I’d bust out laughing if I saw that in person.

    I appreciate that some people are vegan or veggie after going to my hippie-friendly liberal arts college. But after growing up eating many subsistence foods from deer to salmon in Alaska, I’m definitely a big meat eater (and no I’m not a republican).

    I’m guessing the “veggie support group” exists to tell people about veggie resources and not for another reason. But it sure seems like an AA meeting with a flier like that.

    I don’t really see how that sign is controversial. It’s just a joke.

    Jun 30, 2009 at 3:13 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #84   eat meat

    Don’t you all know that if you don’t eat meat you break out with pussies on your body??? LOL southpark had it right. My cousin is 100% vegan and if you ask me she looks very UNHEALTHY. Our bodies need meat and you can see what not eating it does to your body when you look at vegans *Hint you can almost see every bone in their bodies!!* that to me would suggest that being a vegan 100 % is not good for you *Or your aggression levels..people who don’t eat enough are always grumpy…my cousin is always fighting with everyone because she needs to eat some meat and quick before it goes to far and she breaks out with pussies on her face ARGH!!

    Jul 1, 2009 at 2:52 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #85   Jimmy

    I, for one, am a member of PETV … People for the Ethical Treatment of Vegetables. I absolutely refuse to eat vegetables because they are an important part of nature. So get away from the fucking salad bar and go to a steakhouse!

    Jul 1, 2009 at 4:26 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #86   Sleepwalker

    PETA
    Did you know they killed 95% of the animals they took in last year?
    http://www.consumerfreedom.com/pressRelease_detail.cfm/release/258

    http://digg.com/world_news/PETA_Killed_95_Percent_of_Adoptable_Pets_in_its_Care_in_08

    thats why if you’re going to back an organization against animal cruelty (which honestly i don’t see how anyone can be for animal cruelty) go for the ASPCA.

    oh and by the way, MEAT EATERS RULE

    Jul 2, 2009 at 3:26 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #87   Jonas

    Hi, my name is Jonas and I am a Chef.

    And for every Vegan posting in this thread, I – personally, today – gave out delicious fried pork rinds, chocolate covered bacon, and small beef sausages for free to anyone who came into my shop.

    Jul 2, 2009 at 3:35 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #87.1   Snippy

      Aw, Jonas… You shouldn’t try to buy affection in order to compensate for your small sausage.

      Jul 2, 2009 at 6:00 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #88   david

    i like pie and your fat mum lol

    Jul 2, 2009 at 3:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #89   Zach

    (some of) You guys are over-analytical weirdoes. By the time you finished posting those long-ass grammar Nazi comments about plane crashes and percentages of survivability no one cares about, you could have gone to so many better web pages with the time you instead wasted being incredibly boring. Typical internet.

    Jul 2, 2009 at 4:38 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #89.1   anglophile bang

      Zach, please. For your emotional well-being and peace of mind, please DO NOT read today’s entry. I really don’t think you could handle it.

      Jul 2, 2009 at 4:46 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.2   oi bang

      I love you glo.

      Jul 2, 2009 at 4:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.3   anglophile bang

      Oh! oi!

      This is so sudden! I don’t know what to say!

      *bats eyelashes bashfully*

      Jul 2, 2009 at 4:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.4   Zach

      Wow. Obviously that’s not me. Also, what the hell does that have to do with anything I just said? Passive aggressive? Here’s some direct aggression: Fuck you. Eat shit and die.

      (By the way, that guy may say he loves you but what he really loves is the raw ground beef stuffed in the hole in his mattress every night, because he’s a lard-ass forum-reading fucktard desperate for some love like you are and none of you will get any decent fucking done in either of your lifetimes.)

      Jul 7, 2009 at 1:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.5   GK bang

      Oh, Internet tough guys. *pinches Zach’s adorable cheeks* May you never stop being a source of entertainment to us all!

      Jul 7, 2009 at 2:20 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.6   anglophile bang

      Oh, Zach, I told you not to read it. You poor, poor boy. Let me give you a hug.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 8:43 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.7   oi bang

      ha ha ha. Love you too Zach! I hope you don’t mind love from a guy. ;)

      Jul 7, 2009 at 9:55 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #89.8   oi!

      No no I am sure you won’t mind little love from a guy.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 12:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #90   Dan

    Who is a carnivore?
    I’m an omnivore!

    Jul 2, 2009 at 6:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #91   JuxtaPoser bang

    Good Lord, ya’ll are vocal about your food preferences! Just be happy you ate today (especially if you ate some delicious bacon) and let it go.

    Jul 3, 2009 at 12:19 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #92   xex

    @5.5

    What I dont understand about that is what happens to all the cows and chickens? If we are eating less of them then there will be more out there, and they have to eat too. Wouldnt they be cutting into your numbers of saved grain and such there or would you just not feed them?

    Jul 3, 2009 at 8:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #92.1   michael

      if we stop artificially inseminating cows and chickens, the numbers won’t rise. actually, after a short period of time (whatever their lifespan is), the numbers of cows and chickens should drop because they wont have humans forcing them to reproduce

      Jul 7, 2009 at 1:32 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #92.2   Snippy

      Yeah, people really should stop having unprotected sex with cows and chickens.

      Oh, and xex @93, people will have very little reason to pay any attention to what you think when you’re not even bright enough to use the “reply to this comment” link.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 5:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #92.3   T imo® bang

      But Snippy @93.2 Elsie has those drop dead sexy long eyelashes and such a dexterous tongue. When she lows sweet nothings I can’t help myself.

      Added bonus is free half and half for my coffee in the morning!

      Jul 7, 2009 at 5:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #92.4   Snippy

      Uh… I’m sorry to break this to you, T imo, but “Elsie” is actually “Angus” — and that’s not half ‘n’ half.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 6:14 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #92.5   T imo® bang

      AIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

      Transvestite cows!

      :lol:

      Jul 7, 2009 at 6:21 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #92.6   Snippy

      No bull.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 6:24 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #93   se

    Flickr view whore.

    Jul 5, 2009 at 12:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #94   evolved

    Hmmmm…good to see that meat-eating still causes idiocy.

    Not to mention, disease.

    Eat your meat, peeps! The sooner you’re out of the gene pool, the better!

    Jul 7, 2009 at 12:36 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #94.1   Name

      hahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAhahahahaAAAAhahahahahhhehehehahahahahahahhahohohohohHAHAHAHhhhahahahahahAAAAAAAHAhahahaahahahahooohoohhhheeheheheheeeeehhhahahahHAAAhhahahAAAAAAAAAAHAhahahHahAHAHAHhahahahehHhahhehehaHAHAHAgiraffehHeheihohohohAhahahahAAAAHAHHAhahahaHAHahahHAHAHahHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAhhhahhhhhhaahhhhhhhhhhhhahahahhhhahahhahahhaahahHAHAHAhahHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAOOOHOHOHHOHOHAHAHAHEHEHAHEHEHEEHEEHHEEEHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHOAAHOAAHHAHAHAHOHOHOHOHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      HAHAHAHehahHahahahahahHAhahahHAHAHAHAHhahahahHAAHHAAHAhhhh…

      OOOOOHHHHh phew well that was a good one there!!!

      Nearly shat myself :D

      Jul 7, 2009 at 10:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #95   michael

    hey, i’d just like to say that vegan bashing is stupid and is alot more harmful than you think. i have people that used to be good friends that avoid me solely because i’m vegan and they’re scared that i’m going to shove it in their face (i’m not). it’s almost like they immediately believed every stereotype about vegans that they heard from (probably) routine vegan bashers and chose to completely disregard reality. in their mind, they heard vegans were boring, anemic, elitists so they thought that if i was vegan, i must be all three.
    you bashers have no fucking life (and thanks to you i don’t have much of one anymore), and if you don’t like what i believe, then fuck off and shut up, it’s just my opinion. get over it

    Jul 7, 2009 at 1:46 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #95.1   Name

      My guess is that your friends didn’t stop liking you because you might shove being vegan in their faces, but rather because now they see how stupid you are and now your farts smell REALLY bad.

      It’s not your opinion, it’s your INCORRECT opinion. *difference*

      Or maybe they aren’t down with shemales and when you decided to grow a vagina and call yourself a vegan you lost their respect.

      Or maybe they got tired of the fact that you never capitalize your I’s and you spell ‘a lot’ wrong and how stupid you are.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 11:31 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #96   GK bang

    Wow, a fortnight of comments and still going strong! If we can just work waitress-tipping, “babyfree”, and transhumanism into this conversation, I think we might be able to get a never-ending circle of overly-verbose waffle. Now if only we could figure out a way to use it as a power source…

    Jul 7, 2009 at 2:24 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #96.1   GK bang

      (And fecal mist. Where’s me edit button?!)

      Jul 7, 2009 at 2:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #96.2   Snippy

      Mmmm, waffles.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 6:16 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #96.3   T imo® bang

      All I am saying is that if you got your waffles you should at least tip your waitress 15% for just getting them to the table. They depend on their tips to live!

      Jul 7, 2009 at 6:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #96.4   Name

      No. I already paid $7 for my waffles. I don’t want to pay another $1.05 because a waitress carried it the 20 feet from the kitchen to my table. I’ll get it myself and bring my own orange juice.
      They don’t depend on my $1.05 tip to live. They can live without it.

      Jul 7, 2009 at 11:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #96.5   GK bang

      She probably only wants the money so she can afford to have another baybee, ew. Think I’ll go take a messy dump in their bathroom as her “tip”. (Don’t worry, I’ll leave the seat down).

      Jul 9, 2009 at 6:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #97   HappyNat

    Michael it’s nice that you blame vegan bashers for you not having a life. Very big of you, methinks you should look in a mirror. Maybe if you weren’t a whining douche nozzle you’d have friends no matter what you ate/didn’t eat. I love how in every response where a vegan asks why they are picked on the reason they are picked on is completely clear in their own self-centered pathetic comment.

    Jul 7, 2009 at 7:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #98   Ninny

    Double meh. Meat-eaters bashing vegetarians/vegans is just a classic case of “shoot the messenger”. I think vegetarians/vegans are great, they go through so much trouble and give up so much just because they care about more than their own asses. I think that’s really admirable. But I don’t go around trying to “deliberately piss them off” because I don’t have the guts (no pun intended) to go vegan myself, I just admire their courage and determination. All excuses you make such as “humans are naturally meat-eaters” and “you think your shit doesn’t stink” just scream of your own guilty concience you’re unable to face. So, you stoop to bashing the vegans instead of considering your own self-righteousness and selfishness. That is really lame.

    It’s all really easy. They care, you don’t. Not caring does not make you “awesome”, it makes you plain old selfish. At least have the balls to admit it. Next, we’ll have a passive-aggressive note next to a “stop domestic violence” rally ad reading “We real men don’t need no stupid support groups! Keep beating the wife and being AWESOME!!one11!!”

    Jul 9, 2009 at 5:58 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #98.1   anglophile bang

      Yes, because clearly eating meat and spousal abuse belong in the same category. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. Ninny. :roll:

      Jul 9, 2009 at 6:14 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #98.2   GK bang

      But glo, don’t you realise? Meat is murder!

      Jul 9, 2009 at 6:42 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #98.3   anglophile bang

      Legally and societally sanctioned murder. Yum!

      Jul 9, 2009 at 7:22 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #98.4   Name

      “It’s all really easy. They care, you don’t”
      They care irrationally. Non-vegans don’t care about stupid things they shouldn’t care about like killing animals.

      Not caring isn’t the thing that makes meat-eaters awesome, being like a fucking T-Rex makes you awesome. Hence the picture.

      The passive-aggressive note would say “Are you a real man? Chances are you can defend your own damn self! Keep being awesome!!one11!!”

      If I were to leave a note next to a “Stop Domestic Violence” rally ad, it would say “Remember, tomorrow is wife-beating Wednesday!! Don’t forget! Hit her where you can’t see the bruises, and make sure the neighbors can’t hear!!” or something like that, then I could even say “contact me @ *email address* if you have any questions!” just to see how much hate mail I got.

      Jul 9, 2009 at 11:59 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     

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