Writes Devra in San Luis Obispo, California: “I’m visiting my parents in Napa, where they both work at wineries. They recently found out that I smoke cigarettes, and though I’m sure they disapprove, there has been little to no discussion on the matter. My mom wanted me to go with her to a tasting today, so she printed out directions from Google Maps with this note written on it. I found it waiting on my bedside table when I woke up.”
related: and pull up your pants!
56 responses so far ↓
#1
Julia
Shouldn’t the address and phone # be censored? Or am I too sensitive?
Jun 24, 2009 at 8:48 pm rating: +8
#2
amy d
Mom’s ettitude about smoking clearly shines through this note.
Jun 24, 2009 at 9:07 pm rating: +5
#3
Wade
I like how mom softened her tone by scratching out “No” and replacing it with “They don’t like”.
Keeping the aggressive with a nice veneer of passive.
Jun 24, 2009 at 9:14 pm rating: +46
#4
anglophile
I like how she made a smiley face while writing in. It goes nicely with the way she changed the wording to make it absolutely clear that “they” are the ones who disapprove of the smoke.
Ha, Wade. You type faster than me!
Jun 24, 2009 at 9:16 pm rating: +8
#5
J
I really don’t find this note too passive aggressive. Maybe the daughter is reading too much into it.
Jun 24, 2009 at 9:19 pm rating: +19
#6
Thanks!
Ah, a mother’s guilt is beautiful!
Jun 24, 2009 at 10:01 pm rating: +3
#7
stickman
In other words, take a shower and wash the smoke out of your hair before you embarrass me in public.
See you !
Mom
Jun 24, 2009 at 10:14 pm rating: +20
#8
Derekp
I think i’ve seen this somewhere before…but it’s not bad at all
Jun 24, 2009 at 10:29 pm rating: +3
#9
xs
…time to switch to Chanel No. 5 Lites.
Jun 24, 2009 at 11:24 pm rating: +3
#10
xs
even the “in” has a smiley face about it… so guilt-trippy.
Jun 24, 2009 at 11:31 pm rating: +2
#11
TheOldSchool
Devra comes home smothered in cheap Rue St. Denis parfum and smoking Gitanes like she’s still hustling tricks in the Bois de Boulogne –
so Mom’s big idea is to encourage her daughter to drink more wine. Brilliant.
Jun 25, 2009 at 12:11 am rating: +19
#12
xs
All right, I’ll quit smoking, but I am NOT drinking any fucking Merlot!
Jun 25, 2009 at 12:16 am rating: +12
#13
SuperMe
Obviously your mom was trying to say she hates your Designer Imposters perfume.
Put down the Primo.
Jun 25, 2009 at 12:56 am rating: +9
#14
aaa
So, does Devra use nasty-ass, strong perfume to try to cover up her smoking stink or something?
Jun 25, 2009 at 1:06 am rating: +9
#15
mamason
Dear Devra,
You smell like butts and ass. The perfume’s not fooling anyone. I like it because I like you, however, they might not.
(Like it or you, that is.)
See ya!
Mom
Jun 25, 2009 at 2:44 am rating: +7
#16
peonia
why is this note posted on this website?
1. daughter smokes.
2. daughter and mother are going to a wine-tasting where smoking is not appreciated, and legitimately affects the wine-tasting.
3. mother lets daughter know tactfully in the note not to smoke beforehand.
methinks the lady doth protest too much.
Jun 25, 2009 at 5:11 am rating: +11
#17
Jessica
So, we can thus translate this as
“Please don’t turn up smelling like a brothel or like a cigar factory, love you!”
Jun 25, 2009 at 6:57 am rating: +7
#18
claw71
I suppose this note could be perceived as passive-aggressive but I wonder if mom is just trying to be subtle. Sweetheart, I love you but between the pack-and-a-half of Marlboro Reds, the unprotected sex and the Designer Imposters perfume you use instead of a proper shower, well dear, you stink.
Jun 25, 2009 at 9:36 am rating: +5
#19
claw71
What’s really funny about this is that Devra happily identified herself. She’s telling all of her friends and co-workers that her note is on http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com. It’s her 15 minutes of fame, dammit, and she’s going to savor every second. Devra smokes, wears too much cheap perfume and is an embarassment to her hard working parents but she thinks we’re going to take her side because the cloud of cloying stench she wanders around in has finally driven her mom to the brink of a PA note.
The thing of it is, six months from now, after we’ve all forgotten about this relatively weak offering, Devra’s nickname (The Sinky Diva) will still haunt her.
Jun 25, 2009 at 9:45 am rating: +9
#20
GhostWriter
I call Bullshit on Mom.
A flowery scent followed by a smoky finish is the very hallmark of a fine Merlot. Devra’s palatable signature can only increase sales.
Jun 25, 2009 at 10:56 am rating: +11
#21
GhostWriter
Which is worse, the seductive scent of a perfumed woman, the husky smoke of a tightly-rolled Cuban,
…or the collective cottonmouth breath of a flock of freeloaders gulping shots of wine and spitting them into a pail?
Jun 25, 2009 at 11:38 am rating: +7
#22
oi!
I wonder what happened if I did not know that both father and mother work in winery or that she was visiting them in Napa or that they recently found out that she smokes? Earthquake you say?
Her ass story is bigger than the note with the facts that are irrelevant.
To people saying mom is not passive aggressive: she could have just asked on her face.
Jun 25, 2009 at 12:17 pm rating: 0
#23
chris
as a wine and spirits snob, i can actually understand the parents. most tasting rooms would ask you to leave if you reeked of cigarette smoke or the like. ruins the palate of those around you (and you, personally). obviously the parents didn’t care to mention smoking to their daughter before hand; i can see how they’d bring it up here as it would affect both them and the other people in the tasting room. It’d look bad for all. Granted: they should have told her this in person.
Jun 25, 2009 at 1:00 pm rating: +2
#24
jim
those cigarrettes were fucking delicious.
Jun 25, 2009 at 1:26 pm rating: +3
#25
Grog
I think it’s totally passive-aggressive, and totally hilarious! A couple of stinging comments about your (your wife’s?) perfume and smoking, strategically embedded in a flowery note surrounded by niceties!
Jun 26, 2009 at 7:07 am rating: +1
#26
NOFXSUX
I think this note puts the whine and cunt in wine country
Jun 29, 2009 at 11:38 pm rating: 0
#27
matry
those inCLINEd to want to know the name of the winery can easily find it. the number is probably her mothers cell phone
Jul 4, 2009 at 9:50 am rating: 0
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