(You know the book)

August 6th, 2009 · 188 comments

Our submitter from Honolulu lives with two roommates…in a house that belongs to one of those roommate’s parents. (Mayday! Mayday!)

One day, apparently, mother dearest decided to come over for an unannounced visit. Surprise!

speaking of church (you know the book)

(click to enlarge)

related: I can has guilt trip?

FILED UNDER: cleaning · guilt trip · Hawaii · Jesus · Moms & Dads · Mother-son notes


188 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Ashley

    Mom just wants you to know that maybe if you went to church more often you’d clean your tub.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:00 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Either way, you’re on your knees.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:14 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Mrs. Lovejoy

      Won’t anyone think of the children!!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:29 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   bees

    Diversity can be overcome!

    Mass at 7, Klan meeting at 8. Punch and lemon bars will be served.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:02 pm   rating: 145  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   park rose bang

      Great response. Beat me too it, with panache and elan! Though I was going to say MUST be overcome, but that’s about as far as I got.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 9:05 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Canthz_B bang

      Can they mix punch and lemon bars?
      Maybe they would be more comfortable with lemonade.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 9:09 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   DexX

      Diversity can be overcome!

      Signed, Locutus of Borg

      p.s. Resistance is futile

      Aug 6, 2009 at 9:59 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   Neeners

      Should be adversity not diversity or what?

      Was the family sticking together because of the filth of the tub?

      By the grace of God she will overcome her sick need to clean diverse young men’s bathrooms.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:44 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   apedant bang

      I assumed she meant that God-awful dance troop that won the God-awful Britain’s Got Talent. That Diversity should be overcome, perhaps with sledgehammers.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:06 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   famine

      “. . .diversity can be overcome” is my favorite, too. Other than that thought, I’m at a loss for words. . .this note is amazing!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 8:10 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.7   Will

      Amusing, but it should be pointed out that Catholics are about as welcome in the Klan as Jews and Blacks are.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 11:45 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.8   ryanmalloy

      @2.7:
      Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:13 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.9   Mark bang

      Our chief weapon is surprise, surprise and fear, fear and surprise. Our two weapons are fear and surprise.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:53 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.10   MAMARILLA2 bang

      We have need of a stand up philosopher, can you do it?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 1:06 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.11   Maas

      By the grace of God no one will notice she’s off her meds.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:10 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.12   Darling

      My favorite part was “diversity can be overcome.” … I’m not sure we want that, do we?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 1:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Canthz_B bang

    If they hadn’t overcome diversity, they could hire an “undocumented” domestic to work on that tub!

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:07 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      No voy a limpiar detras destos cochinos.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:51 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   park rose bang

    The shower is otherwise known as Typhoid Mary, or perhaps Mary Celeste.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:07 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   mamason bang

      “Come on the shower looks like it is a disease carrier.” 8-O

      Is that the “Jon’s mess” that we’re not supposed to talk about? :-?

      Aug 9, 2009 at 3:16 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Devy

      …or perhaps Mama Celeste?

      Aug 25, 2009 at 4:24 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Canthz_B bang

    It’s very telling that this note looks like it’s being delivered by Daffy.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:12 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   park rose bang

      That’sth desthpicable!

      Aug 6, 2009 at 9:46 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Neeners

      Sufferin succotash (oops that’s Sylvester)

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:47 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Canthz_B bang

      I tawt I taw a wocket pube!

      Well, if Sly was gonna show up… ;-)

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:06 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   park rose

      Where are those wascally pigs? Here piggly-wiggly-wiggly.

      If tweets was going to put in his two-cents worth …

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:23 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Miss Daisy, I cans drive you down to the Piggly Wiggly.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:05 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   cinde

      Mamarilla for the win!!!

      Aug 10, 2009 at 6:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.7   clumber

      WABBIT SEASON!

      Aug 11, 2009 at 3:10 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Wade bang

    Shouldn’t church clothes be the best attire for scrubbing bathrooms? Cleanliness is, after all, next to godliness.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:16 pm   rating: 64  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   park rose bang

      Personally, I think one should wear a red and white striped stovepipe hat, and a red bow tie.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 9:19 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   Neeners

      I picture someone like Dana Carvey’s “church lady” bending over that tub and scrubbing her brains out. “I wonder who caused this bathroom to be a den of iniquity…. Could it be Satan?”

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:15 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   redhed

      I prefer scrubbing in my birthday suit.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   C.S. Harmonikah

      Do you need a roommate?

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:08 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.5   Neeners

      Wait a minute, we aren’t sure what red looks like in the ole b day suit. Could be shocking.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:28 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   anglophile bang

    Jon, Jon, Jon. That’s all we ever hear about. Jon has a job. Jon’s shower isn’t nearly as filthy as ours. Jon showed up at Grandma’s funeral.

    :roll:

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:20 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Kelly

      The police have never brought Jon home drunk at 3am. Jon didn’t steal Grandma’s Social Security checks. WELL MOM, JON WAS NEVER A STAR OF HIS OWN REALITY TV SHOW, EITHER. Are you forgetting that episode of Cops devoted to me?

      God, mothers. What can you do?

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:56 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   Thanks!

      And we don’t want to hear about Jon’s mess after looking at that disease carrying bathtub!

      Can’t everyone be more like good ole Jon?

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:47 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      I thought he was doing well, marrying Kate and having children.

      Aug 14, 2009 at 1:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   C.S. Harmonikah

    It’s nice to get your lecture on your hygiene and personal religious habits all wrapped in one note

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:47 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Kelly

      Cleanliness IS next to godliness.

      Which god? Zeus, actually.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:57 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   flying fish

    well, the lawsuit should be a lot easier to win, what with the letter left as proof. (illegal in hawaii for landlord to just stop in unannounced)

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:52 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   C.S. Harmonikah

      just one more diversity to overcome

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:00 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   park rose bang

    I wonder if she found any hairs from their chinny-chin-chins in the bathroom?

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:52 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Oh Really

      That’s not where those hairs in the tub came from.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:08 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   park rose

      Might be if their boyfriends have been staying over, or if they are male, or a mix, y’know?

      chinko: penis (col) (Japanese).

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:27 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Mecha Kali

      @10.1: What if they’re ballchinians?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 7:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   C.S. Harmonikah

    I assume mom isn’t writing the church newsletter. That is a rambling, disjointed mess in a 7 year old’s handwriting.

    I’ve seen stoned people express their thoughts more logically. And in better handwriting.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:54 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   park rose bang

    Three cheers to all or you – but three boos for the bathtub.

    Set them up, just to knock ‘em down, hey Ma?

    And she huffed and she puffed and she blew their illusion of freedom and independence in …

    Aug 6, 2009 at 9:58 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Neeners

      A wolf in church clothing.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:30 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Sky

    So she’s the wolf to their three little pigs, eh? I’m thinking Mom doesn’t actually know the book as well as she THINKS she does.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 10:06 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   park rose bang

      And the three little pigs are making it to the finish line, 3 cheers!!! But what’s that? The bathtub is coming up the rear, it’s sticking out a clawfoot, it’s tripped over the first little pig!

      Oh, what calamity. And the second little pig has tripped over the first, the bathtub steps on his head and you should hear that sucker squeal.

      Now it has its sights on the third little pig, and the third little pig isn’t being helped any by the big bad wolf who is standing by the finish line huffing and puffing enough to blow a house in.

      Isn’t that illegal, Jerry? I’m sure it’s illegal.

      The clawfooted bathtub is barrelling, I say, barrelling down the track, digging up the turf. Oh my. That’s some damage. And not only has he knocked over the third little pig, but he’s crossed the finish line first!!!

      Wait, the third little pig, the one who made his house of brick and mortar, he is positively clawing and crawling his way to the finish line. One cloven little hoof on the white line, there it is, a close second, maybe even first if the bathtub gets disqualified.

      The crowd has only derision for the bathtub, but exaltation for the third little pig, who might, I fear, it could be, is about to expire along with his brothers. Oh yes, Oh my, his little corkscrew tail was sticking up in defiance, but there it goes, deflated, limp and flaccid as a balloon without air. Just goes to show, it doesn’t matter whether you make your house out of brick, straw or sticks, the end result is the same for all of us. Sadly so.

      Three cheers for all of the three little pigs, I say!!! Three boos for the bathtub.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:18 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Neeners

      She only reads one book and that’s the King James version.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:32 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.3   Nick

      After the race…
      “Those three pigs were f*ing delicious,” said the Big Bad Wolf.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 3:33 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.4   tinkerbell2

      seriously, three people gave this a thumbs-up?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 7:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.5   Mecha Kali

      I had to give it a thumbs up. I felt an overwhelming urge to do so for some reason (I think it was comment 13.4) ;-)

      Aug 10, 2009 at 7:11 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.6   park rose

      Sure, I thought it was funny.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 8:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Neeners

    If she thinks the bathroom is a disease carrier, wait until she checks the bed sheets with her black light.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 10:23 pm   rating: 36  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Providing she can fold them back without cracking them.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 9:49 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Mecha Kali

      I wonder what she’d call them at that point? (Especially if the sheets had cracked.)

      Three little ___________________________?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 7:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Kerry

    You’d think she could have written this note about hygiene on a piece of paper that hadn’t been used as a plate.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 10:28 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   mamason bang

      Those smudges are tears.

      *and Jesus wept*

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:33 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.2   Kelly

      Jesus must have eaten a lot of bacon, then.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 10:58 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.3   C.S. Harmonikah

      The paper got wet from her on hands and knees, scrubbing those ingrates tub. On the sabbath. In her church clothes. And that was the only thing that kept her from cleaning it all.

      What a martyr. I wonder who she learned that from…….

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:14 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.4   mamason bang

      Jesus didn’t eat bacon. I’m pretty sure he was kosher.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:27 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.5   Kelly

      Bacon’s not kosher, mama?

      SHIT.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:32 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.6   Wade bang

      p.s. bacon is life.

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.7   Neeners

      pancetta is life

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:36 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.8   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Treyf!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 9:52 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.9   Mecha Kali

      Jesus was fit to eat?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 7:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.10   park rose bang

      Jesus was fit to be tied, especially at 15.2, but he opted for nails and wood, a few thorns, instead.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 9:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.11   MAMARILLA2 bang

      But they ran out of nails.. ( oh , I am so going to hell for that)

      Aug 14, 2009 at 12:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   leftfoot

    Ahhh, the religious mom-landlord. Or as I like to call them, quite blasphemously, mom-lords.

    There is beauty in calling on the grace of god while demanding you clean your g-d cesspool of a mf tub! And then the guilt of scrubbing on her hands and knees in her church dress.

    Nothing but a Sunday & Wednesday Mass for 40 years can teach that sort of PAness.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 10:34 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   crazybeachcat bang

      i love it that she came in and cleaned the damn nasty bathtub in her CHURCH CLOTHES. really mom? really? they’ve been using it for probably a while like that and it hadn’t killed them yet, pretty sure they could have gone a little longer, at least long enough to get changed out of those fancy ass church clothes. no other reason than to get some new material for a good ol’ fashioned guilt trip.

      and i enjoyed the segue that led into everyone going to mass for grandma. beautiful.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:14 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Michelle S.

      Me too! I enjoyed so much about this letter, from the tub-scrub in church clothes to the dead grandma. Perfection. This mom is pro.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 8:10 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Guilt is for Catholics.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:43 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   crazybeachcat bang

      damn right she’s a pro! she’s got mad skills fo sho.

      i would never have made it as a catholic, the guilt would’ve eaten me alive.

      Aug 8, 2009 at 3:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   park rose bang

      Or the diversity over-comers…

      or zombies, though I don’t think they’re particular about who they eat.

      Aug 8, 2009 at 10:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Jewish mom guilt is nothing compared to Mexican Catholic mom guilt. If that doesn’t work there is aways the chancla. *duck*

      Aug 9, 2009 at 10:09 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   luna

    diversity CAN be overcome. hallelujah!

    Aug 6, 2009 at 10:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   kate

    holy shit, change some of the names around and this note could have been left at my house. my brother and i live with two other roommates in a house we rent from our parents. we had to lay down the law with my mom about “surprise” visits and her expectations of cleanliness. this note sounds just like her, right down to the random guilt-trip about the 1-year anniversary of grandma’s death and the creative license taken with “diversity”. lordy.

    and i love how this woman seems to be sticking up for “jon” more than the other roommates. is jon a former roommate? current roommate and her offspring? current roommate and *not* her offspring (awkward…)?

    Aug 6, 2009 at 11:20 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   crazybeachcat bang

      i can hear something like this coming from my mom too. jesus christ it’s annoying!!! they can turn anything at all into a guilt trip straight to hell…how do you go from a dirty bathtub/shower to grandma’s anniversary to the difficult year they’ve endured and god’s grace and overcoming “diversity”? only a mother.

      i’m thinking that “jon” is a current roommate, the way she references that he is working when she’s asking about grandma-mass. god only knows.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:28 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   Don Mader

    You should all be ashamed. God DIED for you, and you treat it like a joke. May he continure to half mercy on you SOUL.

    Don Mader
    358 W Wilson Ave
    Lombard, IL 60148-3833

    (630) 627-8409

    Aug 6, 2009 at 11:33 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   mamason bang

      Only half mercy? That’s not very christian, is it?

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:42 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   Kelly

      But I want full mercy!

      On a serious note… your phone number? Really?

      (Dammit mama, with your sneaky, fast commenting skills!)

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:44 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   notolaf

      O…..kay…….Did I miss this joke because I don’t get the Comedy Channel? Or is Don Mader, of 358 W Wilson Ave, Lombard, IL, 60148-3833, phone no. (630) 327-8409, some new definition of crazy?

      Oh, and did anybody else just get an echo from The Princess Bride in that post? (Fezzick pretending to be The Dread Pirate Roberts)

      Aug 6, 2009 at 11:48 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.4   Geek Goddess

      Obviously somebody has it in for Don Mader. Maybe he left the shared bathtub filthy and full of random hairs?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:10 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.5   Neeners

      Don, may I call you Don? I plan to use the phone number you provided on any and all sales sites I come in contact with and your address for unspeakable amounts of fake magazine subscriptions and other assorted mish mash found on the internet that calls for addresses. I think God has a sense of humor don’t you? Don, call me at 867-5309 ask for Jenny

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:26 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.6   Neeners

      Continure is french isn’t it?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:28 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.7   Canthz_B bang

      Is God Dead?

      You really need to renew your subscription to Time magazine.
      Those 1966 issues miss a lot of what’s happening today.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 1:21 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.8   Oh Really

      Fake magazine subscriptions? Come on, we can do better than that. Craigslist, estate sale, starting at 6 AM, just ring the doorbell when you arrive.
      I’m just sayin’.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:13 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.9   DC

      OMG, I heard John Hughes died, but I didn’t know God died, too! And for my sins? Awww, that’s so sweet!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:55 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.10   anglophile bang

      All right, now I have something to do on Saturday! Roadtrip to Lombard!

      First day on the Internets, Don? There’s a lot worse than us out there. I personally have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. on this thread

      Aug 7, 2009 at 6:45 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.11   ISUCK

      Don doesn’t answer

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:24 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.12   razzberry

      So, some jerk thinks: “I really hate Don. I know – I’ll post his address and phone number on the Internet and enjoy my wretched scheme as strangers begin to harass him with unwanted magazine subscriptions and prank calls! And I’ll make Don sound like a religious loon, to draw attention to him.”

      Don might be some innocent bystander.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 11:50 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.13   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Ah, the joys of basically annoymous cyber-space.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 11:55 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.14   oi bang

      I am amazed that it took 11 posts to come to obvious conclusion. I saw the identifying info and my first thought was somebody is being screwed big time if all that info is not fake. come on, people can’t be that stupid.
      may be psycho ex is having fun.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:08 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.15   aaa

      So you mean people on the internet really aren’t always who they say they are? :O

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:28 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.16   anglophile bang

      Don’t be sad, aaa. I am exactly who I’ve said I was all along, and I have the cat-hair-covered sweaters to prove it.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.17   Geek Goddess

      psst!! oi!
      check out 19.4!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:14 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.18   oi!

      but aaa I have big cross dangling in front of my screen because it keeps away robot zombies. so you can’t eat my brain.
      also oops. May be I should remove that cross and read better.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.19   Nick

      You witnessing douche.

      Did you put your number on here so people will call you and you can Bible bash with them and hopefully convince them that Jesus is the Christ?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 4:30 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.20   oi

      isuck made appearance but he did not disturbed any waters!
      how……….
      sucky?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 5:06 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.21   Neeners

      ssshhh,shoosh (my mom loved that one)

      if you listen closely you can hear God laughing

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.22   Neeners

      19.12 razz is right, may be a set up…. but we can’t be sure

      I absolutely love razzleberry pie Marie Calendar’s yummy

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.23   Car RamRod

      I agree it’s obviously a bit of revenge or bitterness being taken out on some poor bastard. However, it could be alot worse. This site might have its fair share of reprobates and undesirables, and if we spend all this time reading other peoples’ petty notes and spend time commenting on them, we certainly can find time to prank someone. However, the best way to truly fuck someone over by distributing their info online is to find a gay web personals website with a rough bondage sort of theme, perhaps even post them as a young boy on the NAMBLA website. And if you can suffer through navigating the site to the message board, the payoff will certainly be worth it as your nemesis begins to receive late night calls from mouth breathers and perverts. Works especially well if the target’s spouse or roomates start to wonder about their nocturnal activities.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 11:20 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.24   GK bang

      Obvious prank is obvious.

      Seriously guys, how long have you lot been on the Internet that anyone thought random-personal-info-poster was real? Five minutes? Ten? Fifteen would be pushing it.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 11:33 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.25   Wordtinker doesnt smith bang

      “I don’t want to start
      any blaspemous rumours
      but I think that God’s
      got a sick sense of humor”

      Right along with myself and Don Mader (made her what? mad? scrub tubs in her church clothes? wear the unitard?).

      And if Don didn’t post his info, do we blame housemate Beth or Lee?

      Aug 10, 2009 at 1:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.26   MAMARILLA2 bang

      ♫ We’re damaged people
      Drawn together
      By subtleties that we are not aware of
      Disturbed souls
      Playing out forever
      These games that we once thought we would be scared of

      I see you and raise you.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 1:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.27   Wordtinker doesnt smith bang

      The cleanest I’ve been
      An end to the tears
      And the in-between years
      And the troubles I’ve seen
      Now that I’m clean
      You know what I mean
      I’ve broken my fall
      Put an end to it all
      I’ve changed my routine
      Now I’m clean
      I don’t understand
      What destiny’s planned
      But I’m starting to grasp
      What is in my own hands
      I don’t claim to know
      Where my holiness goes
      I just know that I like
      What is starting to show

      Aug 10, 2009 at 4:53 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   chrys

    What’s up with the spacing? I can’t even laugh at the spelling and grammar because the spacing takes center stage. I would just love to know how she determined which lines needed to stand alone and which ones could be squished together.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 11:50 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Athena

      My theory is she took notes as she walked through the house for her “inspection”…she walks in…stares in horror at the mess, steals a piece of notebook paper and begins. “You THREE…” Walks into the bathroom… “Come on the shower…” and then she goes into the kitchen and from there it just collapses into a train-of-thought exercise.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 4:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   Cameron

    Her note is MORE messy in every way, including grease spots, misspellings, bad grammar — than the people she is accusing.

    If there *IS* a god, please save this woman. More than she thinks she already is.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 11:56 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Cameron

    Her note is MORE messy in every way, including grease spots, misspellings, bad grammar — than the people she is accusing.

    If there *IS* a god, please save this woman. More than she thinks she already is.

    Aug 6, 2009 at 11:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   JS2009

    Hey champs. You might like this. Making fun of the likes of Foreigner and Journey. Can’t go wrong. http://awesomelybadlyrics.blogspot.com/

    Aug 7, 2009 at 12:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   Kelly

      This is not the place to go promoting your blog, buddy!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:49 am   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   Neeners

      JS2009-Read it….can’t like anyone who blasphemes Boston.
      I’m sorry but I like that song Amanda. I’m a hopeless dork.
      Kelly-Liking the food inside food blog. Jim Gaffigan’s bacon spot too funny!
      Never been called champ before, do I get a trophy? What if we do make it to heaven and all we get is a trophy? And not a good one either just those cheap ones everyone gets at little league for participating. That would suck.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   Athena

      Yeah, seen the blog before and found it mildly amusing, but spamming other blogs…not cool, man, not cool.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 5:00 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.4   aaa

      Nevermind. Blah.

      Aug 10, 2009 at 5:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Geek Goddess

    Start cleaning up after yourselves. Your mother doesn’t work here, you know!

    Aug 7, 2009 at 12:14 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   Canthz_B bang

      On the contrary.
      A properly tended and soiled shower can indeed get your mother to work here.
      The roommates are a sly bunch.

      Now, if they can just get mom to visit on Saturdays…preferably without Jon’s ass-kissing self!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 1:13 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Sue Do Nim

    I’ve read the book. There’s no mention of a disease carrier shower. Crazy old lady.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 2:00 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Oh Really

    Damn public libraries and their edited versions of fairy tales! My library didn’t have the version where the big bad wolf was coming to eat the three little pigs because they didn’t clean their bathtubs (because cleaning the tub would cut into the fiddlin’ time, you know).

    Also, “use half the stuff under your sink”? Which half?? And I hope she’s not encouraging them to just go mixing cleaning agents willy-nilly. That will send them right to the hospital. By the time they got out and headed to church to see Grandma, the Big Bad Wolf will have stowed her in the confessional and taken her place in the pew.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 2:18 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   park rose

      :)

      What’s the punishment for mixing fairy tales? Lifelong membership to the Christian Scientists Writers’ Guild?

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:35 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   Neeners

      It was the Readers Digest condensed version. You know like books for those who don’t want to read it all kinda like the Bible. You can read what they want and get their idea of what’s important. I think it was called The Two Little Pigs.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.3   clumber

      I thought it was called, “Before they were Bacon”

      Aug 11, 2009 at 3:18 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   blueangels7901 bang

    Church Mom didn’t mention the crud hanging off Daffy’s bill…the roommates didn’t leave the nasty bathtub- Daffy did, as he was swim-qualifying to take over Michael Phelps’ title. You can see his guilt by the goofy look on his face.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 6:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   Canthz_B bang

      Daffy looks like Goofy?

      I smell a lawsuit!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 9:01 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   amy d bang

    Once upon a time there were three little pigs and the time came for them to leave home and seek their fortunes.

    Before they left, their mother told them, “Whatever you do , do it the best that you can because that’s the way to overcome diversity.”

    The first little pig covered the tub with his grime over a period of weeks.

    The second little pig continued to use the shower without cleaning it, either, thereby causing mildew to grow.

    The third little pig, not wanting to clean up a mess all three of them made, also continued to use the dirty shower. Soon, his contibution was mold.

    One Sabbath, the big bad mom-lord came a-visiting. She took one look at that bathroom and roared, ” Blasphemy! A dirty bathroom is a horror. I’ll scour and I’ll scrub and I’ll rub this tub clean!”

    Aug 7, 2009 at 9:56 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   amy d bang

      Thanks to leftfoot for “mom-lord” :D

      Aug 7, 2009 at 9:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Rachet

    At first I read “scrubbed harder” as “scrubbed herder” and thought “Wow…cool band name!”

    Daffy looks like he’s disturbed by the note, too.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 10:12 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   Wade bang

      To be fair, he was scruffy.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:32 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.2   T imo® bang

      Scrubbed herder is a spin off band of Nerf herder.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.3   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Cue “Buffy” theme… ♫

      Aug 7, 2009 at 10:39 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #30   ignacio

    Haha, I’m not really surprised that an avid churchgoer that expects these kids to go to breaksfast-time mass feels that diversity is something that should be overcome.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 10:55 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   Neeners

      7am is way too early to eat gruel at church…without throwing up

      Aug 7, 2009 at 7:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #31   bibs

    My favorite part is when she is using God’s Grace to overcome diversity. Are we in Apartheid South Africa?

    It’s adversity, sweetheart!

    Aug 7, 2009 at 11:48 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   Xenobiologista

      I love it when people who can’t write proper English act pedantic about stuff in general…lot of that going on at PAN =)

      Aug 7, 2009 at 11:56 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   pedantic park rose bang

      I love it when people who are pedantic act pedantic about matters of aspect and style, and call it proper English. =)

      Aug 8, 2009 at 10:33 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.3   much to my chagrin bang

      I find this thread to be shallow and pedantic.

      Aug 9, 2009 at 6:57 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.4   park rose bang

      Call Don. He’ll help you out ;)

      Aug 9, 2009 at 7:47 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   Desuko.

    I was going to think harder about a witty comment to post here, but I was wearing my church clothes.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 12:22 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   oi bang

    because of god’s grace diversity is being overcome.
    ALL people of different colors red, yellow, black, white, brown, wheat hued are blue now by merely attempting to decipher this note.
    This church goer is true to her word.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 12:29 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      ♫ You think the only people who are people
      Are the people who look and think like you
      But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
      You’ll learn things you never knew, you never knew

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:47 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.2   Mark bang

      Yes, before you judge somebody you should walk a mile in their shoes.

      That way, when you DO judge them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes!

      Aug 7, 2009 at 12:54 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.3   Oh Really

      Have you ever heard a pig cry
      in the gross bathroom
      Or asked the sleeping piglet to awake
      Can you clean the nasty bathroom in your church clothes
      Can you clean with half the stuff under the sink

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:28 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #34   GhostWriter bang

    Quick Poll: Has anybody else ever had an opportunity to attend their Grandma’s 18th anniversary?

    The suggested gift type is porcelain…

    Aug 7, 2009 at 1:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   giblet

    I miss Don … *sniff*

    Aug 7, 2009 at 1:53 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Mysterious13 bang

    Maybe it’s another case of rocket pubes?

    Aug 7, 2009 at 1:56 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Mom has been listening. She can hear everything.

      Aug 7, 2009 at 2:03 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   amanda

    I like the line “We’ve proved that diversity can be overcome”. I think she meant ADVERSITY…. lol!

    Aug 7, 2009 at 4:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Janelle

    Oh, I love the church clothes bit!

    Aug 7, 2009 at 5:07 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   mamason bang

    Remember the part where she says they don’t want to be known as the 3 little pigs… you know the book and then remember how she said that the shower looked like a disease carrier? That was great. And the time she said that it’s “worst” than J- and not to talk about his mess? That was awesome.

    Aug 7, 2009 at 7:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   crazybeachcat bang

      oh yes, i was also quite fond of the “it’s worst than j.” part.

      Aug 8, 2009 at 4:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #39.2   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Joo beemember..

      Aug 8, 2009 at 11:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   Silhouette

    Diversity here means diverse opinions on bathtubs. That diversity must and will be overcome (Jon can do what he wants, though, because he works). Soon, the whole world will be of the same opinion, that bathtubs should be “scrubbing bubble” clean (unless the scrubbing bubbles are in their good clothes.)

    Aug 7, 2009 at 8:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #40.1   park rose bang

      I think it might apply to the types of bacteria and mould that can be found in the unscrubbed bathtub, aka the petri dish.

      The bacteria, mould, and creepy crawlies aligned with them are too diverse, and too dangerous to be allowed to flourish with gay abandon, and with enough VIM and VIGOUR they WILL be overcome, and only one true righteous and good culture will prosper thenceforth. Amen.

      Aug 8, 2009 at 11:06 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #40.2   park rose bang

      Silhouette, what do Bubble and her sisters have to say about all of this? And that’s certainly takes making the inanimate animate (anthropomorphism?) to a new level.

      Aug 8, 2009 at 11:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #41   lauren

    My friend offered me that next year, I could live with her in a house her parents bought- I said no, and this note just confirmed to me all the reasons why.

    Aug 8, 2009 at 9:04 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Claire

    This is nothing compared to the letter my roommate’s aunt left me, if I still had it I’d post. There were accusations of drug abuse and theft GALORE.

    Aug 8, 2009 at 10:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Leah

    I’m still laughing at “Diversity can be overcome”.

    Aug 9, 2009 at 12:28 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #43.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Al Sharpton isn’t laughing.

      Aug 9, 2009 at 10:36 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #44   Lili

    o.O

    Aug 9, 2009 at 10:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   prostoprosom

    What causes the sound of air swishing inside your head?

    Aug 9, 2009 at 2:53 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   OhLawdy bang

    I happen to like spreading disease via shower, thank you. Something about the juxtaposition of an ostensibly clean place with the potential for viral infection gets my nethers all a-flutter.

    Aug 9, 2009 at 4:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Teleute

    Um, am I the only one who missed the ellipsis in this sentence the first time through?

    “Come on the shower looks like it is a disease carrier.”

    TOTALLY different meaning… although possibly also true.

    Aug 9, 2009 at 4:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   QSquared

    Remember: Diversity CAN be Overcome!! (They’ve proven it through church-lady’s housing program!) Now GTFO! =D

    Aug 10, 2009 at 11:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Wordtinker doesnt smith bang

    My favorite bit isn’t even in the note itself. It’s the “ALMOST” to the left of Daffy’s head (giving the whole shot an entirely new twist) that I love.

    Aug 10, 2009 at 4:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      I was thinking, If the door of the fridge is this cluttered, what does the bathroom look like…

      Aug 14, 2009 at 12:30 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #50   ipredator

    How will we have money to support millions of more people in the future?

    Aug 11, 2009 at 3:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #51   logiciel comme hotspot shield

    I did this years ago in a class as well. Though Apple is expensive, its stocks rise quickly.

    Aug 11, 2009 at 5:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #52   John

    The mother dearest Caper

    The police were standing just out side the refrigerator door chatting. They had just come in from the cold when –

    You know what bothers me captain, whats that lt Bradshaw, the senseless dribble on and on about crap then the whole daffy duck magnet thing. I just hope we catch her before her next victims are on the floor in their church cloths scubbing the bathroom and sobbing… wait Im 82 years old my mother died 20 years ago who are the three little pigs? And do I have to overcome diversity it took me so long to get my portfolio diversified.

    I don’t understand capt why does a man dress up in women’s clothing to do this. Because he is daffy now get back in the refrigerator and when you hear that magnet…..

    Aug 12, 2009 at 2:55 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   Hairstyles

    Abbreviation is such a long word because they dont allow abreviations in scrabble ;)

    Aug 14, 2009 at 11:52 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   livekiska.ru

    How much money does the government take out of online contest prize money?

    Aug 14, 2009 at 12:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   Cardstock Media Papers

    If you’re cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

    Aug 19, 2009 at 12:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #56   Radar Detectors Car Electronics

    What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

    Aug 19, 2009 at 1:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #56.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      You’re dead, now if you get scared half to death 3 times, you’re only half dead.

      Aug 19, 2009 at 3:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #57   Cleaning Accessories

    who gives money to political parties to raise money for the campaign?

    Aug 19, 2009 at 2:00 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #58   Blog michaudnqblakexnqn

    Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

    Aug 19, 2009 at 3:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #59   oblivion

    Can you cry underwater?

    Sep 2, 2009 at 5:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   sofchsulanle

    How much money does Wisconsin make a year from speeding tickets, and where does that money go?

    Sep 4, 2009 at 1:20 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   [Nokia|Free Nokia|Free] [theme|themes]

    Do the actors on Unsolved Mysteries ever get arrested because they look just like the criminal they are playing?

    Sep 9, 2009 at 3:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   jcon.ru

    How much money should I have saved for a cross country road trip?

    Sep 22, 2009 at 5:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   shytok.net

    When a store has double doors why do they only let you use one of them?

    Sep 23, 2009 at 1:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   tasuta online filmid

    What benefit is there to toasting bread instead of just eating it untoasted? If there is no benefit, how much electric energy is wasted on toasting in the U.S. of A., do you think?

    Sep 27, 2009 at 12:45 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   UK MILF lady sonia

    What if your gaurdian over your account of money wont let you have your money?

    Oct 3, 2009 at 12:31 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #65.1   Geek Goddess

      Sorry, wrong site. Perhaps you meant to address this question to Dear Abby?

      Oct 3, 2009 at 12:37 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #66   Your girlfriend is frightening the kittens | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] related: (you know the book) [...]

    Nov 24, 2009 at 12:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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