First up: Ami in London spots the fallout over what we can only assume was an onslaught of hungry breakfast bandits.
Yup, we’ve got those in the States, too…as Molly noticed at a grocery store in Ohio.
Adds Molly: “Why anyone would want to take a single slice of bacon out of a box I can’t really say, but if they needed to post three notes it must have been a pressing issue.” (Um, maybe she needed a replacement underwire?) But perhaps she should have checked the lost & found first…
Meanwhile, this Post-it (from a Mom in Florida) and its subsequent responses (from her punctuation-conscious, pork-loving children) bring to mind the oh-so-creepy phenomenon that is thoroughly documented on the stellar blog Suicide food.
This note appears to have been written by an actual pig (at least the Orwellian kind), but it appears instead to have been penned by the young son of submitter Irsh, of the aptly named blog Daily Piglet. Irsh says she found this note taped to the laundry room door when she got home later after her son had already gone to bed. “I’m not sure why he thought I was going to eat the bacon,” she says, “but I have to admit the idea of him not talking to me was briefly appealing.”
![Mom Do! Not! eat one peace [sic] of baken [sic] or I not talk to you](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2526/3899132726_063da8404b_o.jpg "Mom Do! Not! eat one peace [sic] of baken [sic] or I not talk to you")
Happy Rosh Hashanah, everyone!
related: p.s. bacon is life
extra credit: “bacon bandit arrested”; suicidefood
109 responses so far ↓
#1
IrishGuilt
…i was gonna go to bed, but maybe i should have some bacon….
(mainly i just want to thwart anyone from posting ‘first!!!!!111!11′ though)
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:20 pm rating: 90
#2
Fresca
That’s quite a good drawing of a pig eating another pig. Nice work, and a good caption!
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:28 pm rating: 90
#3
bowloftoast
Bacon is better than love.
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:28 pm rating: 90
#4
KatieMB
Well there’s no doubts about what I’m having for breakfast tomorrow morning, providing no one’s stolen it, that is.
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:45 pm rating: 90
#5
ZhayCue
That illustration in the fourth photo down really does take (by brutal cannibalistic force) the bacon.
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:45 pm rating: 90
#6
notolaf
Well, I totally get the one about not opening the bacon. Am I the only one here whose mother ever peaked into the bacon box to make sure it had plenty of lean all the way through and wasn’t just fatback posing as bacon? I seem to recall some brands that had a peel-back strip just for that purpose.
I, too, loved the violent pig picture!
Sep 19, 2009 at 8:57 pm rating: 90
#7
vickie
My mother used to do this all the time, too. She’d pick up a pound of bacon with 2 or 3 nice looking slices in the box window, pull out the inner pack and see slice after slice of slightly gristled fat. That was 40 yrs. ago, I guess cheap store brands haven’t changed their striping!
Sep 19, 2009 at 9:03 pm rating: 90
#8
TheOldSchool
My heart aches for the sweet son of the bacon rapacious mother.
Sep 19, 2009 at 9:18 pm rating: 90
#9
Kelly
Oooooh, why’d I have to become a vegetarian? I miss bacon most of all!
It also makes maintaining my blog feel somewhat hypocritical.
Sep 19, 2009 at 9:25 pm rating: 90
#10
Brunogirl
The caption on the porcine assault is awesome… Nom nom…. PAN goodness.
Sep 19, 2009 at 9:46 pm rating: 90
#11
mamason
I pictured Juliette Lewis in her role as, “The Other Sister,” when I read that last note.
Sep 19, 2009 at 9:57 pm rating: 90
#12
Bob Loblaw
And of course, that bacon, sausage and cheese was fucking delicious ………
Sep 19, 2009 at 11:11 pm rating: 90
#13
Girl Friday
bacon = meat candy
nom nom
I dig the pig.
Sep 19, 2009 at 11:18 pm rating: 90
#14
leftfoot
I can’t believe that someone WASTED a strip of bacon.
That’s honestly the most ridiculous PAN ever posted.
Bacon is more precious than life and is to be EATEN IMMEDIATELY if abandoned.
Sep 19, 2009 at 11:49 pm rating: 90
#15
Silhouette
There’s a reason that Beggin Strips commercial hasn’t changed in years. Most of us relate to the little dog saying, “Bacon, bacon, bacon!” Heck, this might even warrant breaking my rule about multiple exclamation points. Bacon!!
Sep 20, 2009 at 12:05 am rating: 90
#16
Julia
I have to give the artist props for using “nom nom” with their artwork. The internet troll that I am salutes this effort.
Sep 20, 2009 at 12:14 am rating: 90
#17
C.S. Harmonikah
I think that last note was written by this kid…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKBJ19hPL4k
Sep 20, 2009 at 12:43 am rating: 90
#18
mamason
I just think that note #3 could have been much worse. It could have been in the shower and said, “Is this your poop?”
*That reminds me… I need to check the Bristol Stool Chart*
Sep 20, 2009 at 2:08 am rating: 90
#19
Canthz_B
Eating bacon is fine, but I prefer makin’ bacon!
Not what we used to tell the kids though.
We told them we were going into our room to “read”.
I think that’s why they read so much to this day, it must have sounded like mom and dad enjoyed it very much!!
Gives new meaning to the question: “Read any good books lately?”, doesn’t it?
Sep 20, 2009 at 4:58 am rating: 90
#20
MM
A child threatening not to speak to me is a sure fire way to get me to clean that house right out of bacon.
Sep 20, 2009 at 5:10 am rating: 90
#21
can't think of a good name
gah! i shouldn’t have read this. now i am massively craving bacon but stuck in a country that *sob* DOESN’T HAVE BACON!
i will cry myself to sleep tonight.
Sep 20, 2009 at 5:34 am rating: 90
#22
marky not mark
Hey, we’re not going to rid the world of swine flu if we don’t all do our part!
Sep 20, 2009 at 8:46 am rating: 90
#23
frances
I am serioulsy going to the next grocery store and stealing ALL the bacon. NOMNOMNOM
Sep 20, 2009 at 1:17 pm rating: 90
#24
T imo®
Oh sweet Kerry goddess of PAN with your wry schadenfreude of bacon and Rosh Hashanah wishes, happy Rosh Hashanah to you too!
Sep 20, 2009 at 1:23 pm rating: 90
#25
Charlotte
I feel oddly proud – I recognise the first picture from my local shop! We Brits are crazy cool.
Sep 20, 2009 at 5:11 pm rating: 90
#26
MAMARILLA2
Just a small thought …
Fatback = back fat…
Sep 20, 2009 at 5:43 pm rating: 90
#27
MOMMYDEAREST
As a mother, I’m hoping a 4 year old wrote the note about not eating the baken or not talking to his mom… but deep in my heart, I know I KNOW it was probably a 17 year old.
Saddened me.
Sep 20, 2009 at 6:01 pm rating: 90
#28
Lisa
Damn. You mean I have no recourse but to swipe Stack’ems now? Damn.
Sep 20, 2009 at 9:39 pm rating: 90
#29
TheOldSchool
This profile of a smug music industry executive/ass-wipe is the kind of thing that makes life worth sorta living.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/20/magazine/20fob-domains-t.html
Sep 20, 2009 at 10:44 pm rating: 90
#30
The Real Meh, The Great Meh, The Blue Meh
I pray that if and when I have kids, they are remotely as cool as the kids that wrote/drew those post-its. I haven’t laughed so hard in weeks.
Sep 20, 2009 at 10:49 pm rating: 90
#31
ashley holzer
omg, that bacon bra makes me wanna puke. seriously.
Sep 21, 2009 at 8:39 am rating: 90
#32
The Mayor of Bethville
The last note was clearly written by Charlie Kelly.
Sep 21, 2009 at 10:44 am rating: 90
#33
Susana
Isn’t it interesting how blogs often start out light-hearted, full of irony, intelligence, & co-conspirited wit, until some troublemaker gets in there & it becomes a polarized & ugly collection of insulted wisdom competing with brash yo-mama-ism? So sad. Hope it’s not too late to get the bacon train back on the track…I was really enjoying this.
Sep 23, 2009 at 10:23 am rating: 90
#34
fleakfragfry
Pigs are most certainly cannibals, and it’s actually really common for them to kill and eat the weak or sick. Same with most birds, including chickens; and dolphins, believe it or not. Dolphins are a strange case, because on the one hand they’ve been documented holding the head of a sick dolphin above water so it can breathe while it heals, but on the other hand, they’ve also been documented as randomly killing one another for no apparent reason (territorial, sexual, etc.). I guess they’re just moody, like people. Monkeys are the same way. A lot of animals are cold blooded cannibals.
Sep 27, 2009 at 2:41 pm rating: 90
#35
InYourSleep
The pig that’s eating another pig looks more like a porcupine…that’s not cannibalism…
Sep 27, 2009 at 6:20 pm rating: 90
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