Jen in Tallahassee, Florida found this posted on the fridge in her synagogue’s kitchen. “We’ve tried many things to prevent missing food from this refrigerator,” Jen says. “we’ve even installed a lock so that only certain people with keys can get into the refrigerator…and yet, the problem continues.”
related: the PANtheistic approach
173 responses so far ↓
#1
Joe
‘Adonai’ is Hebrew for ‘Lord’. Is the idea here that ‘God is watching’?
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:08 pm rating: 4
#2
Amanda
Love it how everyone is signing Adoni.
Also, how Adoni uses markers to convey messages.
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:09 pm rating: 2
#3
stephanie (bad mom)
I seriously want to throttle the smartass who is afraid of starving to death.
How long before that becomes a past, forgiven transgression?
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:13 pm rating: 2
#4
Faye
Adonai is watching. He watches when you steal other people’s food. When you masturbate. When you masturbate on other people’s stolen food.
He is always watching.
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:14 pm rating: 29
#5
SARAH
this is something that should be posted at the JCC where i work… haha
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:18 pm rating: 0
#6
biteme
I dunno ..ever since I read “Thanx Sharon”..nothing has ever been quite as funny. *sigh* I think I peaked with that one and will never be able to achieve that kind of funny high again!!!! (so Jonesin’ : (
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:19 pm rating: 0
#7
leftfoot
Wait.. My Jewish grandma doesn’t live in Tallahassee.
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:29 pm rating: 2
#8
Car RamRod
It must be nice to be Jewish and be forgiven for everything once a year, kind of like a license to steal, especially if you happen to die shortly after yom kippur and don’t have time to rack up any sins.
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:32 pm rating: 2
#9
Amanda
^Car: Um, but xstians are forgiven ALL the time.
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:39 pm rating: 2
#10
kate
Hmm, only certain people have keys, and yet food is still disappearing, you say…veeeeeeeeery curious…
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:56 pm rating: 7
#11
holly
um… Amanda… it’s Christians.. not xstians… disgusted by anachronisms that take Christ out.. it’s not xmas, either..
Btw…. love this site!
Sep 27, 2009 at 8:56 pm rating: 2
#12
stfu
Then perhaps you shouldn’t ever come to message boards and forums online because its full of people like that. I hope you waste your time correcting each and every grammatical error like a good school teacher.
Sep 27, 2009 at 9:23 pm rating: 4
#13
yo mama
“FWI, no offense, butI’m disgusted by people who don’t keep the grammar in language.”
Wait what’s FWI mean? FYI or FWIW?
Sep 27, 2009 at 9:35 pm rating: 1
#14
sialia
Huh. I’ve never actually run into anyone who refers to God as Adonai while not praying – the Jews ’round here say Hashem.
…Minor detail! I like that hypothetically starving smartass.
Sep 27, 2009 at 9:38 pm rating: 4
#15
david
jews are the prime example that there is no such thing in all of human behavior as atonement.
Sep 27, 2009 at 9:43 pm rating: 0
#16
Frankie
El shaddai, el shaddai,
El-elyon na adonia,
Day to day It’s still my food,
Guess you found out it was good.
El shaddai, el shaddai,
Erkamka na adonai,
You stole it even though it was mine,
El shaddai
Sep 27, 2009 at 9:56 pm rating: 17
#17
aaa
Happy Pissy People/Not Giggglebraxing Day!
Sep 28, 2009 at 12:31 am rating: 4
#18
Woman on the Verge
Dear What if I am Starving to Death!
If you were starving, you would be unable to stand, hold a pen, and comment on my note. I could forgive your impertinence, but I cannot forgive your lack of a question mark.
Prepare to be smited.
Love,
♥
Adonai
Sep 28, 2009 at 6:16 am rating: 17
#19
park rose
For most of its short shelf life, food had lived under the delusion that it was wanted and popular, desired by all; that it was a necessary part of everyone’s day to day. Little did it know that when it slipped out to stretch its legs one night, close to midnight, that it was only a matter of minutes before it was deemed missing, and it was only a matter of minutes before its formerly safe, cool haven was put under lock and key to prevent its return. Good riddance, said the kitchen crew who were tired of the messes that food left behind. As for the food, it went off in a huff and stewed in a rancid puddle of bitterness and rejection which ate it up from the inside until nothing was left.
Sep 28, 2009 at 6:41 am rating: 10
#20
Frankie
Anytime you feel it necessary to put a lock on your refrigerator is absolutely THE moment you need to take a step back and take a good hard look at your life and ask WWAD?
Sep 28, 2009 at 9:28 am rating: 4
#21
Queen of the World
Well it is painfully obvious WHO is stealing the food! The person/persons who are in charge of the keys. DUH!
Sep 28, 2009 at 12:14 pm rating: 2
#22
mamason
And Jesus wept… wait a minute…
Sep 28, 2009 at 1:18 pm rating: 1
#23
jaywalke
My lord FSM is always watching the refrigerator from his place in the Holy Tupperware.
May you be touched by his noodly appendage.
Sep 28, 2009 at 3:20 pm rating: 5
#24
analogeyser
Notice how Adonai completely avoids using or taking anything like a stand on the whole whoever/whomever thing
Maybe not so omniscient ?
Sep 28, 2009 at 9:55 pm rating: 1
#25
CE
Argh! Please stop! That name should only be spoken in prayer. the fact that a Jewish person write that note defiling G-d’s name makes me sick to my stomach.
Sep 29, 2009 at 7:30 am rating: 1
#26
flying fish
I agree with Pers.
I think that God, couldn’t care less what we call Him. He has more important things to deal with.
Now, the lesser gods, they tend to get a bit pissy about that sort of thing. (inferiority complexes don’tcha know)
Sep 29, 2009 at 11:40 am rating: 1
#27
amy d
I spent 20 minutes reading this thread thinking it was about fisting. That’s 20 minutes I’ll never get back.
(tips hat to Rb and Claw)
Sep 29, 2009 at 8:34 pm rating: 2
#28
Wordtinker doesnt smith
Well, as long as we’re discussing the TRUE name of (insert your favorite name for the monotheistic deity here), I guess I’ll chime in.
God’s true name is (drumroll, please):
Politicized Behavior Modification Technique Applicable on a Global Scale.
or Fred, I’ve never been sure.
Sep 29, 2009 at 9:25 pm rating: 4
#29
Renagade676
MrRilla has just made clear how God played a hand in the parting of the Red Sea. He might want to answer to MamaRilla about how the burning bush happened, though. Not meant to offend, just said in humor. I know my hubs would love to use that excuse too, but we’re Wiccan in this household, and that means the Goddess rules.
Back on topic: I loved the whole ‘What if I’m starving to death’ bit. That’s the most pitiful excuse. They always have an option out of starving. Like, I don’t know, going to food bank, getting a job, or maybe ASKING someone. My great-grandma’s church always had a potluck. Maybe if the synogogue had one every Saturday this loser wouldn’t starve. If it was my food disappearing I’d answer back with ‘Now I’m starving too.”.
Oct 1, 2009 at 2:59 am rating: 0
#30
Rachel R.
The person who wrote this note really fails at being Jewish. You aren’t supposed to write God’s name on paper like that because it’ll be crumpled up and thrown out. Especially Adonai, which is the name you use in prayers.
Oct 10, 2009 at 8:51 pm rating: 1
#31 A Note From Adonai » Mixed Multitudes – My Jewish Learning: Exploring Judaism & Jewish Life
[...] reader of Passive Aggressive Notes, but it’s a brilliant site, and I especially liked this note from a synagogue kitchen in [...]
Oct 3, 2011 at 9:51 am rating: 0
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