Aunt Myrtle was always ahead of her time

October 27th, 2009 · 112 comments

Caitlin was browsing in an antique store in Waco, Texas when she ran across this gem dated April 4, 1910. So if you’ve ever heard someone blame passive-aggressive birthday badgering on this new-fangled facetweet technology…well, you might want to refer them to Vera.

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112 responses so far ↓

#1 jbles

Wow. My grandma sent me something exactly like that a month ago.

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:01 pm rating: +4

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#2 Valerie

Uh oh, my great grandma’s name was Vera, I’m calling my mom right now to ask if she had an aunt Myrtle.

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:05 pm rating: +7

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#3 jc

Dear Vera, Happy Birthday. On the 24th I will be getting the broomstick removed from my ass. It would be nice if you could pick me up. Your Aunt, Myrtle

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:05 pm rating: +7

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- #3.1 Canthz_B
  
  Dear Aunt Myrtle,
  
  Why do you need me to pick you up? Your broom will be free of your ass, just hop on and fly home.
  
  Love,
  Vera
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 10:41 pm rating: +30
- #3.2 Critical Grass
  
  Oh, one more thing aunt Myrtle, did you put that broomstick up your own ass?
  Just curious.
  
  Vera
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 10:52 pm rating: +1
- #3.3 MAMARILLA2
  
  Er, She doesn’t really remember. She took a bludger to the head two minutes in. Woke up in the hospital a week later.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:14 pm rating: +8
- #3.4 T.U.M.
  
  I’m laughing so hard it hurts.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:58 pm rating: +1
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#4 Critical Grass

Vera,

While we’re at it, Janice would like a pony too.

Aunt Myrtle.

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:06 pm rating: +27

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- #4.1 Germasidle
  
  Cool vintage postcard; but I believe that this could simply be a reminder to a younger person about another younger person’s birthday?
  (Critical Grass’s pony -comment got me thinking … ) Since most of the PAN’s are submitted w/ a bit of context- we have no clue how old Janice was, or Vera. Or Myrtle! (but I think Myrtle is a name that old people take once they turn 65- have you EVER known a YOUNG Myrtle?!?)
  
  Not to mention Aunt Myrtle had very little space to write her msg. to Vera, and she wrote kinda big, in cursive. She just got down to business & said what she had to. No luxury of space & they didn’t use shrt wrding 4 txts bck then ethr i wud guess.
  
  Nov 2, 2009 at 11:45 am rating: 0
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#5 Neeners

Happy Birthday Vera! Okay, that’s enough celebration.
Now don’t forget to send Janice a birthday card like this one on her birthday!

Make sure your thinking about sending someone else a birthday card on your birthday! Don’t be selfish!

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:08 pm rating: +8

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#6 Canthz_B

Vera, don’t forget to send Janice a birthday card which includes the birthday and mailing address of a third party.
A great deal of money will come your way when you least expect it if you do…I know, it worked for me!

Break this chain at your own risk!

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:18 pm rating: +32

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#7 ginger

Vera, when you send Janice her birthday card, please remind her that Clara’s birthday is on the 9th next month. Hopefully, Clara knows exactly when my birthday is.

Love, Aunt Myrtle

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:20 pm rating: +13

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#8 famous_lizzy

Wow. Props to her for openly admitting that Vera is from “that part of the family we only deal with because they’re family.”
Old ladies are known for their honed passive aggression, I think they learned it during etiquette classes, along with needle point and the correct way to apply whatever it is that causes that old lady smell.

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:21 pm rating: +11

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- #8.1 watchtower
  
  The Mothballs and Topical Cream unit? This is the part of etiquette class that everyone passes with flying colours.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:25 am rating: +1
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#9 Thanks!

Sweet! Antique PAN, love it!

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:25 pm rating: +7

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- #9.1 Kelly
  
  Ahem, this PAN prefers to be called “classic.”
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 3:48 pm rating: +6
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#10 Bob

What exactly makes this passive-aggressive? She’s not asking for her own birthday. It’s just a reminder.

Oct 27, 2009 at 10:33 pm rating: +5

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- #10.1 Critical Grass
  
  Oh Bob, you got us. We’re here trying too hard to find any passive-aggressiveness in all these notes. And while we think we are succeeding, we’re just fooling ourselves, really.
  
  Thank you for opening our eyes, Bob.
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 10:48 pm rating: +27
- #10.2 Palomon
  
  Bob. Oh, Bob. Oh, dear Bob.
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 10:59 pm rating: +7
- #10.3 Canthz_B
  
  “Passive Aggressive Notes.com:
  
  painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over”
  
  How much you wanna bet that can be found somewhere on this page?
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 11:00 pm rating: +2
- #10.4 Palomon
  
  Bob- the lady wrote the reminder on a birthday card. Doesn’t that strike you as something to be put on another note, or in a phone call? Are you so used to this kind of thing that you think it’s normal? Have you spoken to anyone about this? Is there someone in your life who leaves notes above the toilet and has done so for so long you don’t find it intrusive? Bob. Oh, Bob. Oh, dear old Bob. I’m rooting for you, man.
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 11:02 pm rating: +16
- #10.5 Critical Grass
  
  Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, I love it when I hear ya name, got me sayin’ Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, …
  
  Sorry
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 11:31 pm rating: 0
- #10.6 AuntyBron
  
  Well now we know why Bob always dies in the Flair app on Facebook.
  
  Oct 27, 2009 at 11:46 pm rating: +2
- #10.7 g
  
  troll.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 7:31 am rating: 0
- #10.8 GK
  
  Okay, Bob!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 8:19 am rating: 0
- #10.9 farcical aquatic ceremony
  
  I’m on Team Bob. Many of you long-time PAN posters make hilarious comments, kudos for your skills, but perhaps you’ve gotten so used to mocking bitchiness that you’ve forgotten the actual definition of passive-aggressiveness: Merriam-Webster: “Main Entry: passive–aggressive
  Function: adjective
  Date: 1946
  : being, marked by, or displaying behavior characterized by the expression of negative feelings, resentment, and aggression in an unassertive passive way (as through procrastination and stubbornness)”
  
  Myrtle was not expressing negative feelings in an unassertive way, she was–in a very direct way–doing that obnoxious giving of unwanted advice/instructions that some old people seem to think they have the right to give just because they’re old.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 9:27 am rating: +11
- #10.10 Mo®
  
  I just do it to waste time! Passive-Aggressive, Hostile, Direct obnoxious giving of unwanted advice, Insipid post it bon mots I don’t care what gets posted, as long as it makes me laugh.
  
  *Sits back with HR provided popcorn to watch the debate between the “literalists” and the “Loveyoulongtimeposters”*
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:15 am rating: +10
- #10.11 Wade
  
  Oh my dear farcical aquatic ceremony.
  
  I hate to disillusion you, but supreme executive power does not derive from a mandate from the masses, but from the PAN Goddess Herself.
  
  Sorry Bob.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:34 am rating: +8
- #10.12 oi
  
  oh my blood boils here. Hhhow hhow( I stutter when my blood boils) on the earth did Kerry dare to give misleading name to the site? I mean it says passive aggressive notes then there should be no non PA notes on this site ok? I don’t care if there is an explanation posted all over the page. I just don’t. ~~Miss~~ This place is so serious. Today this, tomorrow somebody will post people wearing whites after labor day on labor day website!! Mark my words, there wil be only one outcome Catastrophe!!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:34 am rating: +12
- #10.13 oi
  
  And old posters now you guys! You have been on my nerve since day one! alright! You are old, regular poster that does not mean you can have your own opinion and it’s even a bigger offence if your opinions coincide. You should be sensitive to other’s feeling too ok? What is it some union or what? It’s democracy here. That means only new people can have their opinions alright? and tyrants (old regulars) should be stripped off all the privileges like posting in here and such..
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:48 am rating: +7
- #10.14 MAMARILLA2
  
  Lies, deceit, mixed messages… this is turning into a real marriage. No more drugs for that man.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:11 am rating: +4
- #10.15 Mo®
  
  Come and see the violence inherent in the system. Help! Help! I’m being repressed! Oh, what a giveaway! Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That’s what I’m on about! Did you see him repressing me? You saw him, Didn’t you?
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:15 am rating: +7
- #10.16 Mo®
  
  It’s K-K-K-Kerry c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:21 am rating: +3
- #10.17 GK
  
  This is insanity! Rains of blood, cats and dogs sleeping together, non-passive-aggressive passive-aggressive notes… it’s madness, I tell you!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:27 am rating: +6
- #10.18 Mo®
  
  What GK means is Old Testament, Kerry, real wrath of God type stuff.
  Human sacrifice, dead rising from the grave… mass hysteria!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:41 am rating: +3
- #10.19 GK
  
  Actually I was leaving a dangling “Madness?” hook. But thanks for derailing the joke!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:52 am rating: 0
- #10.20 anglophile
  
  You mean this isn’t bitchydeadladies.com?
  
  Dammit, I’m in the wrong place again!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:52 am rating: +13
- #10.21 MAMARILLA2
  
  If you dress like Halloween, ghouls will try to get in your pants. Hello, I hope you don’t mind: I took a few of your groovy painkillers. I’m just enjoying some of your greatest hits here. Oh God, this is excellent. Oh, bravo. Bra-fucking-vo.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:52 am rating: +2
- #10.22 Wade
  
  Madness?
  
  THIS…IS…PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:10 pm rating: +10
- #10.23 Mo®
  
  He tasks me. He tasks me and I shall have him! I’ll chase him ’round the moons of Nibia and ’round the Antares Maelstrom and ’round Perdition’s flames before I give him up!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:26 pm rating: +5
- #10.24 Bob
  
  Jeez, you guys don’t like dissenting opinions much, huh? You’re doing the wrong Python bit, you need to start the Spanish Inquisition.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:30 pm rating: +3
- #10.25 Wade
  
  King Arthur: I am your king.
  Woman: Well I didn’t vote for you.
  King Arthur: You don’t vote for kings.
  Woman: Well how’d you become king then?
  [Angelic music plays... ]
  King Arthur: The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why I am your king.
  Dennis: [interrupting] Listen, strange women lyin’ in ponds distributin’ swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
  
  Nice try, Bob.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:41 pm rating: +14
- #10.26 oi
  
  Ooh La La!!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:45 pm rating: +2
- #10.27 Wade
  
  You weren’t expecting that one, were you, Bob?
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:58 pm rating: +6
- #10.28 Critical Grass
  
  Monty Python always makes my face look like this
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:07 pm rating: +3
- #10.29 Mark
  
  No it doesn’t.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:12 pm rating: +6
- #10.30 Critical Grass
  
  Oh, c’mon Mark! Are you repressing me?!
  Help! Help! I’m being repressed!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:20 pm rating: +4
- #10.31 Mark
  
  Bloody peasant!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:21 pm rating: +6
- #10.32 farcical aquatic ceremony
  
  @ Bob: I’ve got the cyanide capsules–meet me by the water cooler?
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:24 pm rating: +3
- #10.33 Critical Grass
  
  At least I’m not an ex-leper asking for alms. Different movie, just as funny, though.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:25 pm rating: +1
- #10.34 RP
  
  Please check the –”That’s not passive-aggressive. That’s just plain aggressive!” (Um, yeah.)– link at the top of the page before whining about the technical definition of being PA.
  
  As far as negative feelings go, I’d say that holding someone in such a low regard that they don’t even rate getting a simple birthday wish without getting a reminder to do something else (because they’d obviously forget without the reminder) is pretty f—king negative.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:31 pm rating: +6
- #10.35 MAMARILLA2
  
  Mystic BOB! “Ask Bob, he knows.”
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:32 pm rating: +2
- #10.36 Mo®
  
  Stwike him, Centuwion. Stwike him vewy wuffly!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:38 pm rating: +3
- #10.37 Critical Grass
  
  So… “Bob” goes to the doctor. He has a string hanging out of hi…
  
  Forget it, he won’t think it’s funny either.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:39 pm rating: +2
- #10.38 anglophile
  
  Someone needs to be made to sit in the comfy chair.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:05 pm rating: +3
- #10.39 farcical aquatic ceremony
  
  @RP: haha! you’re it!!
  
  Worse even than the sin of being literal on PAN is the sin of jumping in with a comment that’s been made 20 times already because you were too lazy to bother to read others PANners’ comments (see 10.10 to 10.23, 10.25 to 10.31, and 10.33 for me and Bob being dissed for many hours prior to your arrival on the scene).
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:30 pm rating: +4
- #10.40 Mo®
  
  haHAHAHAHA AHAHhahahHAHAHahAHhaha LuLz dis da funeest OMG like only if it was firsties.
  
  Sheesh why do you guys have to act like fucking Nazis?
  
  Yup I invoked it.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:44 pm rating: +2
- #10.41 Mark
  
  Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it’s an ethos.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 3:13 pm rating: +5
- #10.42 oi
  
  Timo is cutty pie when he invokes narly laws on internets. muuvah.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 4:21 pm rating: +1
- #10.43 K
  
  No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there’s nothing to be afraid of.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 5:00 pm rating: +3
- #10.44 park rose
  
  Timo is a cutty snark
  
  That invocation of Godwin’s Law was fucking delicious.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 6:00 pm rating: +3
- #10.45 Canthz_B
  
  fac, you didn’t like 10.3?
  
  Bottom line is, when you put up your own site, you get to decide on the content.
  That the PANGoddess sees something in this postcard that some commentators may not see is of no consequence, nor of any interest…which is why so many people have tried to say, in a humorous way, “Who asked for your opinion, Bob?”
  
  PS, you missed my birthday a couple of weeks ago. Haven’t you checked your mail? I sent you a reminder.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 8:13 pm rating: +5
- #10.46 Critical Grass
  
  Now back to you, Bob.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 8:23 pm rating: +2
- #10.47 Bob
  
  Man, you guys are like monkeys on acid. Most of you just make noise, and the few of you who are coherent are just vicious.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:26 pm rating: +2
- #10.48 Critical Grass
  
  Incoherent vicious monkeys on acid. ’twas the dream…
  
  Thank you for another precious insight on our personalities, Bob. You’ve been very helpful today. In fact I want to congratulate you, seriously.
  Now, don’t forget to come by tomorrow and congratulate someone else on their sparkly, shiny, shimmery comments. Ok? Ok.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 10:48 pm rating: +6
- #10.49 Canthz_B
  
  Even though I hate repeating myself…“Who asked for your opinion, Bob?”
  
  You seem to actually believe that there are people here who are thin-skinned enough that they give a crap about you putting them down.
  You must hang out with some very weak, insecure people.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:18 pm rating: +5
- #10.50 Geek Goddess
  
  I am really thin-skinned, but I hadn’t posted in this sub-thread, only to be shot down in spectacular flames by the amazing BoB, so I don’t care. If I had posted and made a target of myself, I would now be curled under my desk, whimpering and sucking on my mouse. And I would care, but would be incapable of responding, due to excess salivation shorting out my mouse and rendering my computer unusable, so it would amount to the same thing.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:31 pm rating: +4
- #10.51 park rose
  
  They don’t call ‘em pacifiers for nothing
  
  Sub-thread, GG? You mean there are more comments.
  
  Bob and F.A.C. I think you’re good sports, and Bob, speaking for myself, monkey mind is mostly and permanently engaged – more’s the pity.
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 2:26 am rating: +3
- #10.52 GK
  
  O, we are slain! Slain by the poison arrow of Bob’s wit and the laser-like precision of its aim! See how we fall, wailing and weeping in wretched agony, at your mighty feet! Dance upon our bleached, parched carcasses in this, your utter and total victory! Thou art mighty indeed!
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 4:06 am rating: +5
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#11 Adam

Totally great PAN from back in the day, bravo!

Oct 27, 2009 at 11:36 pm rating: 0

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#12 Neeners

In Aunt Myrtle’s defense, she was only trying to save on postage rather than reminding Vera on another note card. One penny postage was very expensive back then.

Oct 27, 2009 at 11:37 pm rating: +4

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#13 Neeners

Dear Aunt Myrtle,
Thanks for the swell birthday wish. Remember Christmas is December 25th and I would like a card from both you and Janice. And Aunt Myrtle, next time put a gd address on the sommamma bitchin card, it took 3 weeks for the fugn postman to find me and it was well after my birthday when I received it on April 24th.

Love,
Vera

Oct 27, 2009 at 11:41 pm rating: +18

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#14 Canthz_B

Those were the good old days.
Back in 1910, everyone knew one another so there was no need for really detailed addresses.

Oct 27, 2009 at 11:53 pm rating: +2

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- #14.1 MAMARILLA2
  
  A time we remember well , eh CB?
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:14 pm rating: +2
- #14.2 GK
  
  Well, this was back before addresses had really taken off. We used to use hand-drawn maps on the envelope instead, because it was the style at the time. You had to have a compass and a complete set of Ordnance Survey material, not to mention a survival pack, in order to be a postman. Or a “flapman” as we used to call them, because it was the style at the time. Of course, this was all before your time.
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 4:12 am rating: +1
- #14.3 Canthz_B
  
  Well, that explains why the pith helmet is still part of the postman’s kit.
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 5:09 am rating: 0
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#15 Matt Wilson

I bow before greatness.

Oct 28, 2009 at 12:18 am rating: 0

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- #15.1 Critical Grass
  
  Thanks.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 9:25 am rating: +4
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#16 JetJackson

I still think God holds the record for the earliest passive aggressive note with the Ten Commandments. He even carved it into stone and then got Moses to deliver it.

Oct 28, 2009 at 12:49 am rating: +20

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#17 Su

Hey!
My birthday is April 23rd.

Too bad no one sends cards like these to my dad… (He never remembers what day it is.)

Oct 28, 2009 at 1:12 am rating: +2

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- #17.1 Canthz_B
  
  Mama’s baby, Papa’s maybe.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 1:18 am rating: +5
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#18 Ashley R.

I have a letter from 1958. It’s to my mother. It basically says, “Your father killed himself. Here’s the funeral program. Thank you for the picture you sent.”

Can you imagine being 13 or 14 and getting a letter like that?

Oct 28, 2009 at 2:09 am rating: +4

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#19 GK

Hm, maybe I could use a similar tactic to improve my own birthday’s recognition… above zero.

*sheds a single, perfect, crystal tear*

Oct 28, 2009 at 4:12 am rating: +4

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- #19.1 park rose
  
  Have you been dipping into the diamond cream again, GK? There’s a certain shimmy and shiver to you at the moment.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 4:34 am rating: +8
- #19.2 Critical Grass
  
  Oh GK, tell us when your birthday is and we promisse to throw you a big party, with popcorn and everything. But hey, you’ll have to make the popcorn yourself.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 9:31 am rating: +7
- #19.3 How Can I Miss You When...
  
  I’ll even promise to be somewhere else all day long and you can
  silently Satori-ize things to the sound of one Jack flapping….
  
  Your buddy,
  Tyrone
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 6:28 pm rating: +1
- #19.4 GK
  
  Keep your dickbeaters off my Satori!
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 4:13 am rating: +1
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#20 anglophile

I notice John is not being reminded of Janice’s birthday. As a man, he gets off scot-free from remembering his nieces’ birthdays. No, the burden of remembering birthdays always falls to the womenfolk.

Oct 28, 2009 at 8:33 am rating: +3

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- #20.1 Mo®
  
  Of course! But at the last minute John will stop into Ye Olde Curiosity Shoppe and pick up some shin wax or some such thing.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 8:54 am rating: +2
- #20.2 GK
  
  Or a moustache comb.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 9:28 am rating: +3
- #20.3 Mo®
  
  merken comb.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:45 pm rating: +1
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#21 Michelle S.

I marvel at what it must have taken to deliver mail before zip codes and standardization.

“Miss Merriwether Hamhocks c/o Pastor Hamhocks, Illinois”

Somehow mail eventually got there.

Oct 28, 2009 at 10:52 am rating: +1

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- #21.1 anglophile
  
  Well, to be fair, there were a lot fewer people in the country back then….
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:03 pm rating: 0
- #21.2 Mo®
  
  Oh Miss Merriwether Hamhocks had the bodonkadonk! Awwwwww yeeeeah!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 2:47 pm rating: +3
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#22 bliffit

Vera Stradley (daughter of John W. and Jessie Stradley of Liberty Township, Indiana) was only five years old in the spring of 1910 according to the census. Is Aunt Myrtle trying to torture her by writing in cursive?

Oct 28, 2009 at 10:56 am rating: +6

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#23 ChristinaEleen

That birthday card kind of reminds me of the year my birthday cake read:
Happy Birthday Jesus (in large font)
and Christina (in very tiny font)

Oct 28, 2009 at 11:10 am rating: +1

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- #23.1 HappyNat
  
  Well, you aren’t the son of god now are you? You should be happy Jesus didn’t kick you off the cake all together.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:06 pm rating: +2
- #23.2 Critical Grass
  
  Hey HN, we’re all God’s children here! Well, some of us are spawns of the Devil… But that doesn’t change anything in real life, really…
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:13 pm rating: 0
- #23.3 park rose
  
  Her name is Christina. Maybe Jesus had gender issues. Or it was a feminist retelling/reclamation of the Greatest Story Ever Told.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 6:05 pm rating: +3
- #23.4 Thiugh She Was Born A Long, Long Time Ago... Your Mother Should Know
  
  Gideon come up with his eyes on the floor
  Said “You ain’t got a hinge, you can’t close the door.”
  Moses stood up a full six foot ten
  Said “You can’t close the door when the wall’s caved in.”
  
  There’s a feminist retelling of that one? Damn! It must have been the one year I missed the Martha Stewart/Bob Vila Xmas special!
  
  Rose…Sorry bout the typo…on the road + on step-daughters keyboard….ty
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 6:38 pm rating: +1
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#24 Erin

I’ve come across several passive-aggressive post cards in antique stores in the past. There was one that sticks out in my mind where a boy was writing to a girl and asking why she always wrote his brother but not him. Awkward!

Oct 28, 2009 at 11:54 am rating: +2

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- #24.1 Critical Grass
  
  Dude, shaaaaaaare!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 12:14 pm rating: +1
- #24.2 Geek Goddess
  
  I heard a really funny joke the other day!
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:33 pm rating: +1
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#25 Acorn

It took me forever to get to the bottom of your hilarious comments! They were even better than the note itself xD

The best part was I read it to re-read the Monty Python bit and got so much more~

Oct 28, 2009 at 1:52 pm rating: +1

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#26 T.U.M.

Dear Aunt Myrtle,

Can I just forward the used birthday card on to Janice?

Kthxbai,
Vera

Oct 28, 2009 at 3:05 pm rating: +6

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#27 katie

Awesome. AWESOME. Look at that address:

Miss Vera Stradley
Pulaski, Ind.
c/o John Stradley

That’s it. That’s the whole of the address. And it arrived! 1910, ladies and gentlemen.

Oct 28, 2009 at 4:21 pm rating: 0

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- #27.1 JetJackson
  
  Care of John Stradley?… obviously this is prior to women’s suffrage.
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 9:42 pm rating: +1
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#28 Havingfitz

Aunt Myrtles were mass-produced in the early 20th century. Every family had one. Even today they’re passed along through the generations. No holiday is complete without Aunt Myrtle sitting primly at the dinner table and sniffing “It’s so good to see everyone alive. You know, when months go by without hearing from a soul, one does wonder…”

Oct 28, 2009 at 11:19 pm rating: +2

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- #28.1 Geek Goddess
  
  My Aunt Myrtle was actually my ex-husband’s aunt. Does that count?
  
  Oct 28, 2009 at 11:26 pm rating: 0
- #28.2 T.U.M.
  
  I have a great-aunt Myrtle. She bought my mother and her twin sister identical plaid dresses every Christmas. not just identical to each other, but identical from the year before. There are like, ten years’ worth of Christmas pictures with the twins in that same set of plaid dresses.
  
  Oct 29, 2009 at 7:16 am rating: +1
- #28.3 park rose
  
  Did the sizes vary as they got older?
  
  Oct 30, 2009 at 4:55 am rating: 0
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#29 KB

janice and i share a birthday! be sure to send along your birthday wishes to me, folks–surely five months is enough time in advance… thank you kindly!

Nov 23, 2009 at 11:04 pm rating: 0

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Old habits die…with a pout. (157)
- infant tyrone: They leave my family alone, and this isn’t a threat, but if you park in this spot, you are...
- matty-wat: Wow, where’d she go? I think Fek must have been transported up to heaven in the rapture and the rest...
Do you feel inspired now? (168)
- infant tyrone: And I doubt that any of them shoot doctors, ‘glo… but do any of them do a red-hot lambada...
- sunny: I thought I was having a conversation as well. But it seems as though I was being called stupid for what I...
- anglophile: Again, I think you are taking it out of context. This is apparently not the only Biblical...

painfully polite and hilariously hostile writings from shared spaces the world over

Aunt Myrtle was always ahead of her time

October 27th, 2009 · 112 comments

112 responses so far ↓

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