Euphemisms of disturb

December 2nd, 2009 · 335 comments

Our submitter in Dublin, California was leaving her apartment for work one morning when she found this syntactically-challenged note stuck to the door. “I assume my anonymous complaining neighbor has the wrong apartment number because A) My husband and I do not have children and B) For all but one of the dates listed no one was home to make any noise.”

She adds: ” We do, however, have other neighbors next door who are quite loud, and I’ve often been woken up to the sounds of moans, grunts and something heavy slamming into an adjoining wall.” (You know, just like that part in Big where they play pinball and jump on the trampoline!)

“When my husband saw this he laughed pretty hard and wondered aloud weather ‘kids jumping on the bed‘ was a euphemism for loud sex.”

euphemisms of disturb

related: Down and dirty down under (dear)

FILED UNDER: California · neighbors · noise · sex sex sex · spelling and grammar police


335 responses so far ↓

  • #1   kim

    gladding – lol

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:14 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Tim Kolb

      Apparently the note writer is the French police detective Jacques Clouseau trying to solve the mystery and find the infamous Pink Panther diamond.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 10:38 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Starvin' Marvin

      Thank you very much, Mr. Obvious!

      Dec 2, 2009 at 10:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Geek Goddess

      Somebody is Mr Oblivious.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:21 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   mac

      7 am?? im at WORK by 7 am. hectic work schedule my ass.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:51 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   GhostWriter bang

      Yes, but the Denny’s breakfast rush is over by 10:00, and you’re back in bed before noon.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:29 am   rating: 28  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   Kelly

      I had a roommate when I was 25 that always blame sex noises on “jumping on the bed” and thought I was too dumb to know the difference.

      ie… Me: “Hey, you may wanna turn your tv or stereo on…I can always hear you guys.” Her: “What? We’re jumping on the bed…not doing anything dirty.”

      C’mon.

      Dec 8, 2009 at 4:35 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Timmy

    Sounds like Engrish

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:17 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Babblefish to the rescue…!

      Dec 2, 2009 at 9:19 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Maas

      Yeah, and the author has a better grasp of English than I have of most other languages, so that’s not that bad. Now the list of times that noises were heard over the last month is really creepy. Did he or she start taking down the times when it first happened, or does this note represent about two months of being annoyed by the sounds?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:38 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Girl Friday

    It would make it less appears and I would gladding appreciate if your having sex to please invited me next time.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:18 pm   rating: 117  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      Um, MMHM!, that is pretty much implied by the rating number and deep green color of the post. But, thank you, Captain Obvious.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   MMHM! goes Grrrrowl!

      Oh no you didn’t. Don’t you call me that name! I don’t like that! I feel as if your comment was only typed to make me feel dumb..

      Hate..

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   infant tyrone bang

      WotV,

      Are you referring to a comment by “MMHM!” that somehow disappeared sometime today?

      I vaguely recall hovering my cursor over four capital letters earlier today (inveterate [and invertebrate as long as your laughing is with me] Internet dowser that I am) and noticing that {as many do} they linked back to PAN. Not sure why people do this, but it’s only one in a long list of TIDKWPD.

      I wish I could remember the gist of the comment, but it did not make a lasting impression on me memory-wise. Now, I’m not saying it was dumb (as the newly christened {put down the tool-belt, please, it’s Christmas time, not Easter} ” MMHM! goes Grrrrowl!” seems to be accusing you of doing)…I’m just saying I can’t remember what the comment was.

      Unless my memory is playing tricks on me, I suspect there are others out here who would like to know the original “MMHM!” comment.

      Thanks for any help you can give on this.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:26 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   MMHM!

      The original comment I posted said (or was close to).

      Wow eveyone loves your post!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   infant tyrone bang

      MMHM!…

      OK, thanks for that.

      Like I said above, it’s vaguely familiar, and now I know why it didn’t make a big impression on me memory-wise.

      Maybe WotV’s info about the number-counter and the green background was news to you. I’m sure by now you have familiarized yourself with how many ‘thumbs’ to go light green, how many to transition to dark green, how statistically unlikely it is that anything will get close to GirlFriday’s current +76, etc., ’cause you’re probably not dumb. Just new here I hope.

      Now I’m not going to speak for WotV, but I wouldn’t be surprised if the Captain Obvious remark was just intended to gently shock you into figuring out how the number/color system works here or how it seems like everyone tries to put something original in their comments.

      Nope, wouldn’t be a bit surprised if that was all it meant to do.
      But even if it wasn’t intended as shock pedagogy and was meant as more of a gentle smack at someone who, at the time, had not yet acclimated to this environment, well…the best advice I can give you is to trot down to #20.20 and meditate on my colleague GG’s perfect expression of the important rule: Don’t take anything seriously. Other rules are optional.

      Oh, in case you were wondering…you haven’t found a thumb-down icon because there isn’t one any more. I hear there used to be one.
      Not sure why it went the way of the dodo…fights, moonage daydream freak-outs, rock and roll suicides, but it’s a safer world now…enjoy.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:29 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   Girl Friday

      **Takes a bow**

      I’m especially proud as I posted it BEFORE my first cup of coffee…although it was AFTER my 5th shot of Jack…

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:30 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   infant tyrone bang

      GF,

      Can we do brunch sometime?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   Girl Friday

      BYOB?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.9   infant tyrone bang

      If that’s an original ‘BYOB’, then sure, mine, yours, and one for the hazmat crew, too.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   famous_lizzy

    I get the feeling that since he/she took the time to write out the note, yet not read it over, that they printed out a bunch of copies (one for every door) and, if they noticed the mistakes at all, knew there were too many pages to reprint them.

    Or, they can’t spell or accurately discern where noise is coming from.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:22 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Lindsay

    i gladding write my neighb a notes after several instance of disturb. perhaps i does writings on drunk. alcohol make errors less appears!

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:31 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   OH!meso

    I so ronery, oh so ronery. Me love you long time.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:32 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Sucky, ****y, Fie Dorrar…

      Dec 2, 2009 at 9:25 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   Critical Grass bang

      Each you fiftyn dorrar. Me love you long time. Me so ronery.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 10:47 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   Palomon bang

      No wit CG, he too beaucoup!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:10 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.4   Mo®

      Mmmm all I have is a twenty…

      ♬ I work very hard and make up great prans
      But nobody ristens, no one understands
      Seems that no one takes me serirousry

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:29 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.5   Critical Grass bang

      ♬Poor rittre me.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:57 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   crumplet bang

    This is unacceptable, I wouldn’t let my kids to have loud sex at that sorta hours.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:49 pm   rating: 41  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   JetJackson

    October 1 at 3:43am – a bit of ‘roll-over, are you awake, oh you are, fancy a bit of…. ‘ disturb.

    October 19 at 11:30pm – a bit of ‘thanks for doing the dishes and putting out the rubbish like I asked you’ disturb.

    October 21 at 7:00am – a bit of ‘fuck it, I will call in a sickie for the morning’ disturb.

    November 03 at 11:50pm – a bit of ‘nothing but shitty late night tv on’ disturb.

    I love a good bit of disturb!

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:53 pm   rating: 68  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   MK

      JJ – favorite comment!

      But seriously guys, even with the terrible grammar, perhaps the neighbor is only being PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE about “kids” making noise. :)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   JetJackson

      Ahh shucks MK. I have my little routine now. See new PAN post, go to coffee machine, try and think of something funny while waiting for the water to boil, make coffee, back to desk, post.

      Hmmm… I think I have a problem.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:11 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   MK

      After taking a day and coming back, I now realize that typing words onto the computer doesn’t convey inflections as much as I thought. Boo, I fail.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:13 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   justin

    sure, it’s the KIDS that are making the mattress and bed bang against the wall at 3:43am. no hanky panky going on at all.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:53 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Jonathan

      To some the thought of it being “future kids” jumping on the bed is a little too disturb.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 8:55 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Jonathan

    All I can tell from the note is that the neighb couple needs to get down on it more regularly. At this rate I’ll never be able to justify installing that hidden webcam!

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:53 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Canthz_B bang

    Sounds like an escapee from a CIA sleep deprivation experiment.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 8:58 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   KryVin

    HOURS OF DISTURB sounds like the name of a lame post-hardcore metal band :P

    Dec 2, 2009 at 9:16 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   crumplet bang

      Now it can also be the title of the latest Apartment Porn! :D

      Dec 2, 2009 at 9:19 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   T.U.M.

    “The Hours of Disturb” was the best J-horror movie ever.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 9:20 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Mo®

      OMG Yes! Where she sticks the syringe into the guys eye and injects color water into it while kneeing him in the berries! That was scary gross!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:32 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Delurker

    I don’t understand why you’re all jumping to the conclusion that it is due to sex. I have the answer, the submitter stated that “no one was home to make any noise,” so there’s really only one plausible explanation. . .when they are out of the apartment, it is taken over by young squatters who bring a trampoline and bounce a lot. What better place to hang out than an empty apartment where minimal disturb will happening?

    Dec 2, 2009 at 10:12 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   T.U.M.

      Those crazy circus folk!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:14 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   infant tyrone bang

      Tobby Tyler !
      Now we know where Daughter should look for missing Chihuahua !

      Thanks, T.U.M.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:31 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Havingfitz

    Listen, Mr. Neighbor! It’s my apartment and I’m a grown-up and I’ll use my inflatable Dora the Explorer Bouncy Castle any time I want!

    Dec 2, 2009 at 10:44 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Tim Kolb

      Maybe Mr. Neighbor would so gladding appreciate it if he could come over and use our bouncy castle sometime.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   Critical Grass bang

    Me not go comment at these one, because that’s obviously write in prefect Engrish. You guys is traveling triping.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 10:54 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   infant tyrone bang

      La discreción es la mejor parte del valor.

      Aquellos tipos son por un viaje salvaje y loco pero ellos no vienen a Quito con nosotros. Por favor diga GG si usted la ve.

      Cuidadoso, ellos pueden ser abanicos diligentes de Menudo.

      Abrazos + B.N.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Critical Grass bang

      De qué tipos estás a hablar, Ty?

      Yo daré lo recado a GG. No te preocupas.

      Menudo? No te reprimas!

      Besos.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:56 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   infant tyrone bang

      Hablaba de los mismos tipos que usted dijo eran ‘triping’.

      Besos reflejados

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Critical Grass bang

      Ah bien… Estos tipos son muy peligrosos. Hay de tener cuidado con ellos.

      I thought we were going to Caracas, not Quito. Why do you keep changing our destination?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   infant tyrone bang

      Somehow the global warming thing came up so Quito got ‘floated’ as an idea. Maybe Caracas would be fine a a starting point, but we should probably make a trip to Quito early and at least buy some ‘just in case’ property. Who knows, we may not make it out of Medellin with both our skins and our sanity intact…

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   Geek Goddess

      My sanity will be as intact coming out as it was coming in. I won’t speak for those who travel with me.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:36 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.7   infant tyrone bang

      After a quick review, apologies for implying that any of us will have sanity on either boundary of the Visit to Medellin. Just a figure of speech, folks.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.8   Critical Grass bang

      Ok, so we start at Caracas, then we go to Medellín, Quito, Lima, La paz, Santiago, Buenos Aires and Montevideo. Is that ok with you guys?
      Oh, and sanity is optional under the Ecuador, so you’ll just have to hold on to yours ’till we leave Colombia. Then it’s every man/woman/hermaphodite for himself/herself and God for all of us.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:23 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.9   Geek Goddess

      Hey, Rose, they are calling me God again!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.10   park rose bang

      Well, that’s fine. I thought that just you and I agreed that I didn’t have to put you up on a pedestal. Did you damn t_w to hell, by the way (at her request)?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.11   Geek Goddess

      That could be construed as feeding the trolls, Rose. Besides, CB dealt with the grammar, punctuation and spelling issues quite elegantly, and I felt that no further response was needed.

      Just to repeat it for those who may have missed it, calling me GG is just fine. Geek works well too, if you don’t want to type out my whole name. Other pet variations will be considered upon application. There is no need to call me God.

      And if you shout out, “Oh God, Oh God, Oh God” at moments of disturb, don’t count on a coherent response at the time. I may be focused on other things.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:32 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.12   Critical Grass bang

      What if we shout “Oh God, Oh God, Oh God” at other… er… moments? :|

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:39 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.13   Geek Goddess

      It really all depends on how many of you are shouting at once, CG. I will try my best to stay focused on the job at hand.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:04 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.14   Palomon bang

      From now on I will call out “Oh GG, oh GG…”

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:00 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.15   Palomon bang

      I will also use “moments of disturb” as a euphamism whenever I can. Damn, Greek, I wish I could give you more thumbs.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.16   Critical Grass bang

      Who’s Greek?
      Oh yeah, I think if I shout “Oh, GG…” instead of “Oh, God…” she’ll come faster. But then she might misunderstand the reason of my shouting. Or not… :roll:

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:43 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   ClearlyDemented

    The following must be read with a character-on-The Hills voice:

    OMG, I think I found the Nigerian prince who I lost touch with after sending him the $10,000 he needed to buy a plane ticket so he could bring me the check for my portion of the bars of gold granpappy buried in his mother’s palace’s garden while they were sleeping together during the war! He might even be my half-uncle or something! Greatest. Day. Ever.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:02 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   time_waster

    i don’t think that was children bouncing on the bed… something a bit more… fun(perverse)… was going on. but thats just my opinion

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   cellardoor

    This is a lame entry. Admittedly the English is pretty sad, but it`s hardly passive aggressive. I thought it was pretty direct, and not at all rude.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:10 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   aaa bang

      http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/wtf/

      Also: If they wanted to be really direct, they would’ve knocked and their door and spoken to them in person instead of leaving a pansy-ass note.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   Geek Goddess

      Direct??!? Direct?!!? It went directly to the wrong apartment.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:25 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   Andrea

      I’m all for this being passive-aggressive. I have a hard time imagining that the writer really believes that those are kids making that noise at those hours. He’s probably just trying to skirt around the whole ‘I hear you having sex’ conversation. Pretending not to know the embarrassing source of the noise and putting the complaint in a note is pretty on par for this site’s definition of passive aggressive.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 11:08 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Jane

    This is the sweetest note ever! And my heart goes out to this poor guy who just wants to get maybe 6 hours sleep before going back to work.

    My guess is that 100% of the people dissing this guy’s English have never spoken any other language whatsoever. I’m all for enjoying the “gladding” and such, but not when you’re making fun of a person who tried as hard as he could to be polite. You can laugh at the ESL without laughing at the ESL writer.

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:20 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   aaa bang

      I take it you’re new to PAN.

      First Rule of PAN: Don’t fucking take anything seriously here!

      I take it you can guess what the Second Rule of PAN is….

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:23 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   time_waster

      maybe she can but i cant… what is it?
      and you just took her note seriously too, so i think that makes you a hypocrite. :)

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:28 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.3   aaa bang

      I don’t remember taking the note seriously. But then again, you do know what’s going on in my head better, don’t you? ;D

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:43 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.4   time_waster

      puh-leez! I don’t know what goes on in my own head, much less yours.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.5   aaa bang

      Once again, First Rule of PAN. (Note the winking emoticon.)

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:50 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.6   time_waster

      exactly!!!

      and you never did tell me the 2nd rule

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.7   aaa bang

      Okay, you got me.

      And there is no Second Rule. Only a Third Rule.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:53 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.8   time_waster

      what is the third rule

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.9   JetJackson

      I think you two are caught in an infinite loop which needs terminating.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:55 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.10   aaa bang

      Pfftttt, this loop only goes as far as my attention span.

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.11   time_waster

      and im ADOS… so this infinite loop has a couple gaps in it

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:57 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.12   Palomon bang

      Isn’t one of the rules of PAN “we never talk about PAN?”

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:17 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.13   Geek Goddess

      A mobius PAN?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:30 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.14   Gavin

      Wow I think we can use Jane’s response as the PAN for tommorow, obviously some pent up emotion in there somewhere, someone didn’t win the egg and spoon race at school?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:19 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.15   Mo®

      A Higgs boson PAN?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:42 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.16   infant tyrone bang

      Can’t resist…@ 2:40 or so, below will pay off Higgs-time…

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j50ZssEojtM

      Love the Hawking voice start-up…

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:16 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.17   GhostWriter bang

      The Seventh Rule of PAN:
      Threads will go on as long as they have to.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:36 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.18   Critical Grass bang

      Ok, so let me get this: PAN has a first and a third rule. Is the fifth rule concerning the use of even numbers in our PAN Legislation?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:15 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.19   GhostWriter bang

      Further, who is the 1st rule, and I don’t know’s the 3rd.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:43 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.20   Geek Goddess

      Our chief rule is don’t fucking take anything seriously here . . . don’t take anything seriously and threads will go on as long as they need to . . . threads will go on and don’t take anything seriously. Our two rules are don’t take anything seriously and threads will go on as long as they need to and never talk about PAN. Our three rules . . .

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:15 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.21   anglophile bang

      I didn’t expect the PANish Inquisition.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:39 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.22   MAMARILLA2 bang

      No one “expects” the PANish Inquisition.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:30 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.23   Critical Grass bang

      The tricky thing about PANish Inquisition is that it always strikes from behind, when you less expect and… AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:28 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.24   Mark bang

      Rule 6.
      There is NOOOOO rule 6!

      Rule 7.
      No poofters!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:43 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.25   infant tyrone bang

      Wuzzatchew, Bruce?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.26   Palomon bang

      #20.16 is the best link in the entire history of the interweb.
      Tie that kangaroo down, sport!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.27   infant tyrone bang

      I’m in awe of the writer/performer, Professor P., she’s brain-hot for sure.
      “I’m about to drop some particle physics in da club.”

      Sent the clip off to Machine Gun Thompson (MC5), but rap’s not a big thing of his and working between Cern and Detroit would be a problem.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:51 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.28   Dara

      Mark got my thumb for mentioning poofters.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:41 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.29   cellardoor

      Oh, for God’s sake, don’t EVER try to defend the note writer on this site, or have an opinion contrary to the collective snark. You will get smacked down, quickly, by the commenters here. You must agree with the dominant viewpoint in order to enjoy any comraderie on this site. I finding it best to avoid reading the commentary altogether, because it reads like an online version of a high school clique. **countdown to the flames and analysis of this post as passive-aggressive**

      Dec 6, 2009 at 4:45 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.30   anglophile bang

      Oh, cellardoor! Now that you have accused me of being close-minded, cliquish, and, apparently, a poor writer, will you please, please, please be my friend????

      Dec 6, 2009 at 6:02 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.31   park rose bang

      Not good enough for you, huh, ‘glo? *sniff* Well, I guess I’ve always got my eek oddess.
      Except, she said she was only virtually my friend :cry:

      This thread became very unravelled a long time before, right? I quite like the writer of this note. Guess I’ll be bumped out of the clique too, and left to shiver with the other huddled, starving masses for saying that. It’s okay. I guess I can be your and cellar door’s friend (if s/he will have me), as I too will stand as one of the ostracised, weeping so much I’ll rust her hinges. Or, more accurately, cringe, really, you know, I’ll cringe and simper, kind of bent over and stooped and huddled, as one of the lowly ostracised and exiled.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 7:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.32   anglophile

      You LIKE the note writer, rose?

      You are dead to me now.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 7:49 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.33   park rose bang

      Do you think cellar door might offer me a corner in which to lie (down), some straw, a stable, a mule, a donkey, a virgin, a saviour, a cuckold, three wise men, a bit of gold, some frankincense…?

      I just had to slap myself for a second. I was getting carried away.

      Even so, woe is me for sure. Much gnashing of teeth, and piteous wailing.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 8:07 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.34   kureshii

      I finding it best to avoid reading the commentary altogether, because it reads like an online version of a high school clique.

      Really? That’s pretty much the main reason why I still visit PAN from time to time. The entries are entertaining, sure, but the comments always greatly extend the entertainment value.

      And where’s the fun in holding a contrary opinion and disagreeing with the dominant viewpoint if it doesn’t raise the ire of the incumbent community? :D

      I would gladding appreciate if you noisy bed-jumpers would please don’t disturb the note-writers, especially if they have hectic work schedules. Thank you so much for your understanding and support.

      Below you can see the comments of disturb:
      1.1
      2
      2.1
      5

      Dec 6, 2009 at 8:41 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   aaa bang

    Please not to the disturb
    I know your kids are having sex
    And you’re jumping on beds

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:24 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   infant tyrone bang

      Are you adding milk sugar or inositol to your uncut Haiku ?
      This one seems stepped on to the tune of 3 over par.

      Or perhaps you’re obliquely inviting us to see the increasing
      number of New Californians as a kind of Triple-Bogeymen ?

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.2   time_waster

      Tyrone!!!! you made my brain explode! and no one sells ‘em any more

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:49 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.3   aaa bang

      I’ve taken to adding pure shit to my haikus. Well, not that it’s really a haiku at this point.

      :D

      Dec 2, 2009 at 11:52 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.4   infant tyrone bang

      Aw geez, sorry there time_waster…
      You’ll find that brains are still available, just not in your previous size.
      Probably best to cowboy up to a size Small and hope you grow into it.

      Leave the soap on the shower floor if you can’t handle the analogy.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:05 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.5   time_waster

      I’m great at analogies, except for bad ones. Go suck it tyrone.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:19 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.6   infant tyrone bang

      Kathy Griffin, don’t you have a show to rehearse?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 9:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   time_waster

    nope. it had 6, 8, 6 syllables. but it was funny

    Dec 2, 2009 at 11:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   aaa bang

    It is now morning
    Now I will bang on the wall
    I suck at haiku

    Dec 3, 2009 at 12:25 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   time_waster

      you’re good at haiku
      morn is thirty minutes past
      walls shouldn’t have holes

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:29 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   aaa bang

      My time zone is East
      Cool kids totally have angst
      NON SEQUITUR! AH!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:40 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   time_waster

      i live in central
      can we stop speaking haiku
      five syllables suck

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:45 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.4   park rose bang

      Not to want to wrest Mark’s pedantic crown off his pointy dome, but haiku has three syllables in Japanese. It’s a diphthong-less thing. Nor to actually interrupt the infinite loop (maybe you should all record an album and call it ‘Let it Be’ to do that), either. But it seems that I may have.
      Granny undies are also probably diphthongless. It’s all about the comfort. Mama knows how to rock them, and Wade has written the best LOLspeak haiku out, in the murky, distant past. Challenge. Though maybe it is easier.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:48 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.5   aaa bang

      I like dipthongs (and other verbal things that go between your buttcheeks) and the relative freedom of non-Japanese haikus. I don’t really like having to have that magical keyword that refers to the season of your haiku. I also like insomnia and eating pâté made from the livers of livestock infested with Fasciola hepatica. Although it doesn’t do me much good since I’m half dead.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:57 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.6   time_waster

      why do i KEEP adding to different threads. sleeping at night is for wusses

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:58 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.7   aaa bang

      If you keep failing to gigglebrax, we may have to dust off the Unitard. (If anyone remembers it. XP )

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:05 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.8   time_waster

      what the bloody hell is a gigglebrax

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:07 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.9   park rose bang

      hey, aaa – animal liver, what happened to the avacado loving vegie half-dead automatron that we all once knew and loved?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:07 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.10   time_waster

      apparently he’s busy remembering the Unitard

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:09 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.11   aaa bang

      Once I half-died, I became a parasitologist. I wanted to study the fuckers first-hand, so I had to infect myself with various parasites. A lot of them come from poorly prepared meat products (although you can get liver flukes from watercress, but I’m too poor for that shit). I’m just suffering for my science. Like suffering for my art, but I’m too lazy and apathetic to suffer for that shit. I did cut off my leg as performance art once, but I was already half-dead, so it didn’t really matter too much.

      (Also, I’m a she. At least mostly, anyway. And you’ll have to learn about gigglebraxing and the ‘Tard the hard way.)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:16 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.12   time_waster

      im sorry. he is just the usual pronoun used. and i know what a unitard is, but i googled gigglebraxing and nothing came up (that was useful)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:18 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.13   park rose bang

      I gave a clue with the matron there timewaster. He hasn’t really been the usual pronoun since the 80s. And I might help you out, so stand by, if the links are still available. Link number one.
      So, aaa you gave up law, then? I thought there’d be great call for one-legged defenders of the victimized and greedy.
      Link 2 from Troy who has not posted with us for ages. And I’ll put link 3 separately, so that I don’t invoke the wrath of Heisa.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:20 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.14   aaa bang

      Not a unitard, The Unitard. It’s an ancient relic lost to time.

      But gigglebraxing is nesting your comments.

      And no harm with the pronoun. Most people just say “What the fuck is that?!?!?” anyway. :O

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:22 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.15   time_waster

      there isnt a difference b/w a unitard and The Unitard, except capatilization and a/The

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:26 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.16   park rose bang

      And The Unitent .

      It’s kind of like the difference between a president, and the President. aaa says it better down below.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:29 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.17   aaa bang

      The Unitard should strike untold fear in the hearts of all. A unitard is just mildly disturbing.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:29 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.18   time_waster

      okay. i got it now

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:30 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.19   Girl Friday

      I have The Unitard. I’m going to run it to the dry cleaners and have it to you by tomorrow.

      Sorry, I forgot to return it the last time I said something was fucking delicious and since then my dog has been making it his bitch.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.20   infant tyrone bang

      For G’Man @23.4 (Sorry ’bout the Hoover/Tolson drag reference)

      Granny’s wide undies
      White as swans in Winter snow
      Granny craves blue thongs

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:34 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   time_waster

    Let it be is a very good song actually. that was the only part of your comment i understand though. i will attempt. this is america, not japan (i know haiku is a japanese poem) and i was taught that it is 5 syllables then 7 then five again

    Dec 3, 2009 at 12:54 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   park rose bang

      Let it Be is a great album. Just going on JJ’s infinite loop link. Beatles split-up soon after recording it, I think. Recording it was meant to bring them closer together, but it drove them further apart.

      I thought the next line to living in america was – eye to eye, station to station. And man, I’ve just saved myself a lot on airfare and visa to know that that is where I am at.

      The word haiku, in Japanese, is ha-i-ku. But not to worry, English uses diphthongs, /ai/, Japanese do not in the same way.

      I don’t think haiku should be limited to seasons either, aaa.

      Also, as aaa said, you are actually replying to no-one in your stand-alone thread. But me? I’ll reply to that. Emptiness – wholeness, it’s all one and the same.

      Anyway, gotta get out of my own infinite loop. Still daylight-ish here.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:18 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.2   time_waster

      I KNOW!!! that was exactly what i said earlier. i cant click the right buttons worth crap. i need help really bad

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:22 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.3   aaa bang

      I’ll reply to you here. For a price.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:32 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.4   time_waster

      did i say you had to reply here? nope :)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.5   aaa bang

      Your replies seemed lonely. Every comment needs healthy self-esteem. Even if that self-esteem is artificial.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:39 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.6   time_waster

      puh-leez, my replies are practically narcissistic

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:41 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.7   aaa bang

      Narcissism is useless if there isn’t a crowd to preen in front of.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.8   time_waster

      have you not heard the story of Narcissus? he stayed in his lonesome (well… there was Echo and all those other girls) to stare at his face in water

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.9   aaa bang

      Narcissus was useless because he turned into fucking flowers. Truly effective narcissists suck those around them into the Cult of Look at How Fucking Awesome I Am.

      But I am apathetic and am thus useless in this regard. Although I suppose I could thwart the narcissists by turning on the Full Power of My Apathy. If I cared enough to do so.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:50 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.10   park rose bang

      I was just going to say, we could leave you to reply to your own comments. I do (reply to my own comments). He perished, though. You do realise? I thought that about Narcissus, too, aaa. But I think that is the guy who followed the sun, right? (the flower metamorphee). Okay, I stand corrected before I get corrected. Gotta log off.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.11   time_waster

      they were really pretty flowers and they probably did fuck each other, seeing as who they were. and he did have a cult, but he disregarded them and divine punishment made him fall in love with him self so TRUE narcissists ought not to care about if they have followers seeing as he never did

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:55 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.12   Canthz_B bang

      At first I thought “time_waster” meant someone who was just wasting a little of their time on the internet.
      Now I know that it means someone who wastes other people’s time on the internet.

      The End :-|

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:56 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.13   time_waster

      technecally i waste both times. and its not alittle of my time considering i spend about 11/24 hours on the internet, am always logged on and have no social life outside facebook

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:58 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.14   aaa bang

      Pffft, I waste my own time on the internet. I have an obscene number of tabs going in Firefox, of which this is only one. >:D

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:04 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.15   Canthz_B bang

      News Flash:
      This isn’t Facebook, but you are welcomed to return there.

      We really wouldn’t want to keep you.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:04 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.16   time_waster

      don’t worry, i’m logged on to facebook too but all of my friends are asleep. i think i only have nine tabs pulled up though

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.17   JessieJane

      Does one have to be an established poster to get annoyed with people? Because I’m getting sick of using my inside voice.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:18 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.18   2blessed2Bstressed

      the good news is the suicide rate is down
      the bad news is numbers of web trolls are on the rise
      if we get lucky they’ll start killing each other off

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:38 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.19   time_waster

      MUWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:39 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.20   aaa bang

      Oh, did I forget to loop infinitely while I was pulling guinea worms out of my skin?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:52 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.21   time_waster

      yes, you should be ashamed

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:53 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.22   Canthz_B bang

      Our next exhibit, Ladies and Gentlemen, is one of the many Asspandas in captivity (please, don’t feed the animals).
      Note its inability to see that the jig is up…a very common trait of the species.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:55 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.23   time_waster

      i think i have an biological uncle who’s an asspanda

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:07 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.24   Monty

      Shake the family tree a little harder. I bet there are more up there.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:25 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.25   time_waster

      i also have an 2 aunts, a mom, a dad, a grandpa, 2 grandmas (one is on my dads side incase you start thinking bad about my grandpa),an uncle, and this is just my close family

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:28 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.26   Monty

      Happily, you haven’t procreated.

      You’ve either realised the folly of such an act or been unable to find a willing mate.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:42 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.27   time_waster

      Shit! as an asspanda i dont understand at all what you mean

      Dec 3, 2009 at 3:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.28   time_waster

      i looked up procreated. so you think i can’t get laid? well you can suck it cause i don’t want to due to my young age and im not married

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:08 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.29   JetJackson

      Oh you tell them time_waster! You tell them good!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:15 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.30   time_waster

      thanks… i think. its kinda hard to detect sarcasm on something unspoken

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.31   JetJackson

      Well you did detect it. So it couldn’t be that hard ;)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:18 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.32   time_waster

      YAY!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!! that just made my day *not*. Is it too much to ask to not be made fun of due to my belief in no sex until marriage?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:20 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.33   Canthz_B bang

      No, but can we still make fun of you for being an asshole?

      You looked up “procreated”? Really??

      I think Monty was saying that you should never, ever pass your genes on, but that’s just my take on it.
      I agree wholeheartedly with his opinion, BTW.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:30 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.34   time_waster

      of course

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.35   Canthz_B bang

      Then it’s probably past your bedtime…no matter what time-zone you’re in. :???:

      Hie thee away.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:41 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.36   time_waster

      im waking up in about 30 minutes so yeah, but i dont have a bedtime

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.37   Canthz_B bang

      …or a clue, if you have to look-up pretty simple words.

      Do they still teach prefixes and suffixes?
      Or were you absent that week?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:49 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.38   time_waster

      yes they still do. and i used those when i saw that, but i wanted to ask webster just be sure i was right. and to make a remark on the youth of today, i have one of the … larger vocabularies of my grade, and also one that is bigger than my cousins (and he is 4 years older than me)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:02 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.39   anglophile

      Um, exactly how old are you, time_waster?

      ‘Cause a lot of these posters here have parole violations to worry about if they’re caught talking to you online.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:10 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.40   Canthz_B bang

      Well, I’m sure the sixth grade class is very proud of you.
      “…an biological uncle” is certainly bound to evoke feelings of pride.

      You have earned my respect.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:12 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.41   time_waster

      old enough to know i don’t have to tell you and young enough to where i can’t

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:12 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.42   time_waster

      but i will say ive passed sixth grade… awhile ago

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.43   Canthz_B bang

      Go back.
      I’m afraid you may have missed some things.
      Even more afraid that you may not have.

      Why do I keep wanting to call you “waste_water”? :-(

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:26 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.44   time_waster

      i didnt miss anything (except science) in my defense it was really boring and the starwars dude was narrating the video…

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:28 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.45   park rose bang

      Nah, I’m giving him (?) an biological uncle, cos’ I’m figuring he edited ‘biological’ in. An asspanda was correct.
      I’ve been watching you read through the archives… what’s your game plan?

      Boy, you sure are a funny kid, Johnny, but I like you!

      No need to tell me you don’t need me to validate you. I think we covered that in the Narcissus thread.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:35 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.46   time_waster

      im a she

      im an asspanda

      and i say biological because he isnt an uncle by marriage and i didnt edit it in

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.47   park rose bang

      Okay, then. It should be ‘a’ biological uncle, so I take it back. I thought you had made a typing mistake. ‘An’ asspanda is correct, because ‘asspanda’ starts with a vowel.

      ADOS? I looked it up. A form of assessing autism? or something else.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.48   time_waster

      no. its something some girl at my school said. attention deficit ohh shiny

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:44 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.49   time_waster

      and i know about a/an

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.50   anglophile bang

      OK, folks, let’s stop contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:46 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.51   time_waster

      why? i came here and i commented and i take responsibility for my actions.

      i do find it offensive that i say im young and ya’ll automatically think im stupid

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.52   park rose bang

      Just please explain, why ‘an’ two aunts, and ‘an’ biological uncle if you know all about ‘a and an’?

      Don’t think I’ve made any comments about your age or your intelligence until the a/an thing. I find it kind of offensive that you automatically think that I did.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:53 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.53   time_waster

      damn me to hell for making a typo, dear god amighty.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:54 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.54   Canthz_B bang

      Far from the truth!!

      Your age has nothing to do with your stupidity!!

      Hell, I know lots of stupid older people.
      The thing they have in common is that they were also stupid young people once upon a time.

      There is still time, take advantage of it, or not.
      “A typo”? That isn’t your first grammatical error here.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:01 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.55   time_waster

      i’m actually kind of appalled at you adults. you make a deal about everything… except my cussing

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:03 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.56   Canthz_B bang

      We don’t give a flying fuck about that.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:26 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.57   time_waster

      Well, as long as no one gives a damn about anything except my grammar, I think i’ll be okay. That was perfect, if I do say so myself.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.58   Canthz_B bang

      As long as “i’ll” is perfect…if you do say so yourself. ;-)

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:40 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.59   time_waster

      i do and it is

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:08 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.60   tinkerbell2

      Won’t somebody think of the CHILDREN? time_waster, go to bed already!

      Actually, ADOS was pretty funny. so a thumbs-up for that.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:16 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.61   Canthz_B bang

      Really? Gee, I thought the ‘i’ should have been capitalized. Silly me.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.62   Geek Goddess

      *Wakes up and comes back to thread to realize that time_waster has called me ‘dear’ and ‘amighty’. Wonders if Rose put tw up to it, and then, after caffeine kicks in, remembers that Rose is a friend.*

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.63   aaa bang

      Shit!

      As it turns out, the living dead do need sleep. (I’m a chump…) When I woke up around noon, my keyboard was encrusted with saliva, and my pants and wallet were missing. :c

      I’m gonna go back to staring into a corner now.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:51 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.64   Critical Grass bang

      I just read the whole thread… 10 minutes of my life I’m never getting back.

      CB, now that you mentioned it “time_waster” will always be “waste water” to me.

      aaa, I think I know who has your wallet, as for your pants… Well, you didn’t have them on to begin with.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:38 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.65   Mark bang

      No fair! Think of the poor maligned wastewater! What did it ever do to you?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:49 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.66   infant tyrone bang

      Yeah, Mark!
      Some wastewater can take one’s breath away…thankfully.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.67   infant tyrone bang

      And if not for Wastewater, what would all those pissed-off Republicans have done for the first few years of the Clinton administration ??

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.68   Critical Grass bang

      All right… all right… but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order… what have the Romans done for us?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.69   JetJackson

      Do you think we can push this thread out to 100?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.70   Critical Grass bang

      The least we can do is try. But why stop at 100, Pinky? We can go on and on, until… Until… Take over the world! MUAHAHAHA! :evil:

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:26 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.71   Geek Goddess

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8G2V6dsVuU

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:21 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.72   Geek Goddess

      or this:
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnPsetcPFJU

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:27 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.73   Geek Goddess

      Or if you prefer to focus on the world domination part rather than the On and On and On, there is this:
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5ITHhiiT9s

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.74   time_waster

      Wastewater needed sleep too. No Geek Goddess, I was not reffering to you at all. Seeing as I went 24 hours w/o sleep, I crashed when I got home from school. The Romans gave us plenty more things, like literature, art, and archetechture(?spelling?). Yes, “i’ll” isn’t capitalized; Don’t you know your 1st grade grammar? :)

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.75   time_waster

      Okay, since Canthz so kindly edited her post AFTER I responded, I will now respond… a couple twenty comments later. Yes, I did look up procreated and we covered this earlier, but just as a little FYI, I can look up what ever the hell I want. I am pretty sure I have wonderful genes since I’m so pulchritudinous :) and very smart; The only thing I really lack is people skills, and you can’t really blame me for that.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:28 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.76   Geek Goddess

      Well, I was pretty sure that no one else uses my name on here, so it seemed to me that remarks addressed to ‘god’ were directed at me.

      Over 3/4 of the way there, JJ!

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:18 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.77   Geek Goddess

      I will leave CB to deal with issues of gender identity.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:19 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.78   time_waster

      In case you don’t know, usually, when people take the lord’s name in vain, they’re reffering to the lord, not another poster.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:21 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.79   Geek Goddess

      Our chief lack is people skills . . . people skills and spelling . . . spelling and people skills. Our two lacks are people skills and spelling . . . and a sense of humor. Our three lacks are people skills, spelling and a sense of humor . . . and an ability to drop the subj . . .

      I’ll come in again shall I?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:23 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.80   Geek Goddess

      Twenty more to go, help me out here people!

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.81   time_waster

      i know my spelling sucks. so does my paople skills. weve covered the “dropping the subject” with asspanda. and if i didn’t have a sense of humour, how in the hell do think i couldve gone so long on this thread. i also lack modesty

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:26 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.82   park rose bang

      Hey God ♥ , I knew we said we wouldn’t, but you know, who can resist a challenge and someone who takes everything so literally. Plus, I just know you are pulchritudinous too.

      eekess is equivalent of god, anyway. We all know. And I want to link this, because I love it.

      Got a Christmas party to go to. Sorry to bail!

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:32 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.83   pony girl

      I’m confused.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:41 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.84   Geek Goddess

      Re: taking names in vain. See Rose’s comment at 35.5

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:41 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.85   Geek Goddess

      Also see 16.8 to 16.16.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:44 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.86   Geek Goddess

      It’s okay pg, we are still happy to have you back, and I am sure you will get caught up pretty quick.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:46 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.87   Geek Goddess

      Have a good party, Rose. Careful if you meet some one who wants to break bubblers afterwards.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:47 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.88   Canthz_B bang

      PG, You’re confused? Apparently, I’ve had a sex-change operation.
      How do you think I feel?

      Especially since they’ve left me this enormous clit!! 8-O

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:49 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.89   Geek Goddess

      I knew we could count on you to straighten things out for us on that, CB! That’s why I left it in your capable hands!

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.90   time_waster

      GG, I’m really sorry to have offended the diety of nerds but i was reffering to God… the christian god

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.91   Geek Goddess

      Did someone say that I’m not a Christian?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:53 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.92   time_waster

      no. no one said anything about your religion. i was just clearing things up in case you were of another religion

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:55 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.93   Geek Goddess

      How very magnanimous of you, t_w!

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.94   Canthz_B bang

      I wonder how long it took waste_water to find a five-syllable word she could use to describe her fantasy self?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.95   Geek Goddess

      She could use it for a line in a haiku.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:00 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.96   time_waster

      to name a word i
      have known before this thread is
      pulchritudinous

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.97   Geek Goddess

      pulchritudinous
      not very euphonious
      wins for worst haiku?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:08 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.98   time_waster

      Geek Goddess posted
      to which i kindly complied
      though it lacked much tact

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:11 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.99   Canthz_B bang

      But not, until this
      thread, “procreated” had you
      any knowledge? Sad.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:13 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.100   time_waster

      Nay, ’tis true. you speak
      of these lacks but do you know
      all? No you do not

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.101   Geek Goddess

      Hey JetJackson, we did it!

      Sorry, CG, you’ll have to chose a different Christmas present.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:20 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.102   Canthz_B bang

      You know not of what
      you speak. For I know all and
      see all…’cept some things! ;-)

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:27 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.103   Geek Goddess

      In another dimension
      With voyeuristic intention
      Well secluded, I see all

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:34 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.104   time_waster

      omniscient, no
      of another world and breed
      most definitely

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.105   Nick Noehm bang

      madness … takes its toll

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:41 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.106   time_waster

      you’re just jealous

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.107   Canthz_B bang

      intelligence test.
      knowing when to speak ones mind,
      knowing when outclassed.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:48 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.108   Nick Noehm bang

      GG, you knew you were setting SOMEBODY up …

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:49 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.109   time_waster

      I’ll speak my mind whenever the damn hell i want to

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.110   Canthz_B bang

      It appears so…I pity you that weakness of character.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:53 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.111   time_waster

      i hate pity

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:54 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.112   Geek Goddess

      Our chief weapon is pit…

      No, I can’t do it again.

      Going to bed now

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:57 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.113   pony girl

      24.95

      LMFAO

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.114   Nick Noehm bang

      We have enough evidence, I think. tw fails the Turing Test. Where’s the OFF button?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 2:58 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.115   Canthz_B bang

      Don’t hate pity…you’re likely to receive so much of it.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:00 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.116   time_waster

      i must be a time waster if i KEEP commenting on this shit

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:01 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.117   Geek Goddess

      Feel free to stop at any time. We’ve gotten it up past 100.

      I really am going to bed now; turning my computer off and everything.

      What, you don’t believe me? I can do it if I want to.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:03 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.118   Canthz_B bang

      Me too…you’re such little shit to comment upon.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:04 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.119   time_waster

      i dont think i will stop commenting. i quite frequently talk to myself but y’all are really fun to annoy

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:06 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.120   Canthz_B bang

      That’s right! Trolls think they are annoying the people who are fucking them back!

      I forgot that for a second.

      “Two can play at that game” never fits into their world-view. They actually think they’re running something, the pathetic bastards.

      I mean, DAMN! I told you at #24.33 that we were making fun (sport) of you, but here you stand…a fine example of a sucker! :lol:

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:20 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.121   time_waster

      i know! the little motherfuckers! but don’t worry, y’all are annoying me too

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:22 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.122   JetJackson

      Indeed it is done… I go for a run, get some dinner and oh my time_waster “be cussin”. Not bad at 122… CB, GG, PG, hats off to you.

      Dec 4, 2009 at 4:26 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.123   park rose bang

      Names taken in vein?
      smack, horse, H, Lou Reed, anything by the Velvet Underground, tar, china, chasing the dragon (oops, no), junk, dope… I’m a bit behind the times, but I’m sure you can all be taking me up to ‘speed’ ;)

      Hey, t_w, doesn’t your god deserve capitalisation? Glad to see you included a ‘u’ in your humour there, though. Canadian, colonial, English, or copycat?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 10:29 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.124   Critical Grass bang

      Yeah, I’m still shocked waste_water didn’t get the Monty Python reference. I mean, I could handle the other annoying stuff about her/him/it, but this…

      Dec 4, 2009 at 12:53 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.125   time_waster

      I’ve never seen monty python so… and yes my god does deserve capatilization. i didnt capatilize just now bacause i was refering to my god but not naming God. the other times i just dont feel like pressing shift

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.126   Rudolf

      I’m Time_Waster’s sister, and I must say, I am DEEPLY OFFENDED that I am not on the list of AssPandas…. >.>

      Dec 4, 2009 at 4:22 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.127   time_waster

      don’t worry, you’re on the list of just pure ass… unlike the half bred pandas

      Dec 4, 2009 at 4:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.128   Rudolf

      glad to know I’m a purebred and not a mixed breed. >:)

      Dec 4, 2009 at 4:28 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.129   time_waster

      you should be thrilled

      Dec 4, 2009 at 4:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.130   park rose bang

      t_w, I was referring to your specific god, which is a Christian god, so it seems. You know, Jesus Christ! as opposed to jesus christ. Though the lower case does fit into the meek and mild and will inherit the earth and so on.

      Could you get some reading comprehension skills, and irony detecting skills while you’re at it? Though the irony debate has long been worn out (ironed out?).

      Dec 4, 2009 at 5:36 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.131   time_waster

      isn’t irony and hypocritism the same thing? the reason i put “u” in things like humour and favourite is b/c i was taught that way. i am actually southern, which you ought to of concluded from my use of “y’all”

      Dec 4, 2009 at 5:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.132   Canthz_B bang

      No, they aren’t. Hypocritism? Try “hypocrisy”

      Normally when you find two different words they have different meanings, even when the difference is subtle (aroma, scent, smell, stench, waste_water). Note the progression of meaning from positive to negative connotation?

      That’s why we have so many words. The more of them you learn, the better you will be able to communicate…instead of just talking. ;-)

      Dec 5, 2009 at 2:25 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.133   Nick Noehm bang

      Hadn’t ever noticed “ought to of” before, though it’s a natural enough sibling to the common “could of”, “would of”, “should of” …

      Searching gives only 2530 gHits. Of the top fifty or so, most fall into a few categories:

      ** speech of rustic characters, in fiction by well-known (ie, known to be literate) authors, including John Steinbeck, H G Wells, Eudora Welty
      ** speech of good-ol’-boy athletes, as represented in sports memoirs
      ** correct usage: “… you ought to, of course, write correctly …”
      ** “What I Ought to of Learnt in High School” – a 1920s magazine article in which the author complains about his education
      ** nonsense word mashups on sellers’ web pages, intended to attract search engines
      ** a Hillbilly dictionary

      The intentional, un-ironic “ought to of” is barely detectable …

      Hmm?
      What?
      This isn’t Language Log?

      Such a long comment
      brilliant illumination
      it was wrongly placed

      Dec 5, 2009 at 4:19 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.134   park rose bang

      I know I should of written this yesterday, but the better part of valour is knowing when not to flog the dead gay, grey mare…but anyway.

      Nice summary, Nick.

      CB, I think that hypocriticism might be a perfectly cromulent word, especially for doctors ;) (link is for t_w).

      It’s really the breath-taking literalism that takes my breath away, but, well, y’all know about stereotypes and such and I wouldn’t want to further sustain them… but you know, what the hell. In for a penny, in for a pound.

      Dec 5, 2009 at 5:48 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.135   Canthz_B bang

      Then, rose, I’ll not hypercriticize! :-D

      Dec 5, 2009 at 6:39 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.136   time_waster

      Thank you for the link ,park rose. How very generous of you. I can use whatever phrase i want to, whether that be “ought to of” or “the first damn time”

      Dec 5, 2009 at 6:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.137   Canthz_B bang

      We could have saved so much time.
      You ought to have told us sooner. :mrgreen:

      Dec 5, 2009 at 6:51 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.138   pony girl

      I didn’t know *anyone* had never seen Monty Python.

      Dec 5, 2009 at 7:24 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.139   time_waster

      neither did rudolf. she was gonna make me watch a bunch of damn youtube links for it. i have paid dearly for that comment… :) i love this site. if i had the slightest ego before, i sure as hell don’t now. love y’all

      Dec 5, 2009 at 7:42 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.140   Nick Noehm bang

      Someone’s hijacked t_w’s nick.

      Dec 5, 2009 at 8:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.141   anglophile bang

      rose: I love my dead gay mare!

      Nick, thanks for the linguistics. Very enjoyable.

      I’d like to add something on-topic just to justify my joke and my kudos, but I don’t know what the hell the topic is anymore. I ought to of paid closer attention in high school, I suppose.

      Dec 5, 2009 at 8:56 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.142   Geek Goddess

      I hope nobody was looking at pony girl while mentioning flogging dead gay grey mares. I don’t know what I would of done if I seen someone smacking our pg.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 4:12 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.143   pony girl

      Um, thanks, I think?
      Are you saying I’m a dead gay grey mare?
      I may be a mare sometimes, ok, I’ll give you that.
      ;)

      ps- I am not into flogging, but a few spanks is ok.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 4:23 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.144   park rose bang

      I would of spanked you, if I could of spanked you, and though I ought to of been here, I was else where doing what I thought ought to of been done (I don’t know if that one works). ;)

      Dec 6, 2009 at 7:47 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.145   Geek Goddess

      No, pg, I don’t think that you are a dead gay grey mare. I was just worried that someone looking for a floggable dead gay grey mare might be willing to go for any pony they could get their hands on. I’ve always pictured you as a fuzzy, lively chestnut pinto with a cute nose, bright eyes and furry ears. And obviously intelligent. My visualization breaks down a bit when I try to picture you interacting with mouse and keyboard, though.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 3:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.146   infant tyrone bang

      Well, Catherwood, just imagine the Giant Rat of Sumatra (mouse) and the surrealistic keyboard from the dream sequence of “5,000 Fingers of Dr. T”

      Ev’r'thing’s big in Texas, even peripherals.

      Why, hayul…you could rope a bronco with just this here thread. 146th?

      Dec 6, 2009 at 7:23 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.147   Geek Goddess

      Don’t you start anything, Ty! Why, next thing you know, everybody will be bragging about 146th, and then where will we be?

      Dec 7, 2009 at 6:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.148   infant tyrone bang

      Well, Ollie…if present circumstances are any sort of a star to do celestial navigation by (Heavens to Murgatroyd, did I say that?), if everybody wanted to get to 146th we’d have us a bunch of long, twisty and turny threads ’round here.
      Wouldn’t bother me much, but tryin’ to be considerate of the young’uns’s Keynesian attention economy these days, just forget I said anythinig.

      Dec 7, 2009 at 7:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Geek Goddess

    A full winter moon
    Approaches coldest midnight
    My time zone; need sleep

    Dec 3, 2009 at 1:35 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   Geek Goddess

      This one could have been
      Gigglebraxed to either thread
      Above; chose neither

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:36 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.2   Geek Goddess

      Or either of the two above those, fwiw

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:44 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.3   park rose bang

      eekess eekess eek
      eekesses eekesses ess
      eek eek ess eek eek

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:44 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.4   aaa bang

      Taking a third choice
      Cool. All the greats have done it
      Oh look! A pothole!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:46 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.5   Mo®

      ♥ GG aaa PR ♥

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:52 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   Sarah

    I got one a lot like that about “raucus [sic] behaviour” late at night, ie, when we’re all in bed, or at least watching TV quietly in our rooms etc. One night the lady even banged on the ceiling (presumably to shut us up) and woke me up. I was considering submitting the note (“I trust this simple appeal will do the trick” – some great passive aggression going on there) but I think I’ve thrown it away now.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 2:02 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Geek Goddess

      Did you count how many times she knocked on the ceiling, Sarah? This could have been important information, especially if she knocked three times. Also, have you ever been awakened by her banging twice on the pipe?

      So what is the answer? Does she want you? or is the answer ‘no’?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:17 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   Bunnee

      Tony Orlando and Dawn FTW!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:28 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   Sarah

    PS I couldn’t help writing a passive-aggressive note back: “I understand what it is like to have your sleep disturbed as just last night I was woken by a loud banging noise coming from above my room”. Couldn’t help it. Haven’t heard a word from her since.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 2:04 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   Hessia

      What was the point of that? The note was reasonable, if not addressed to the wrong people.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:40 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.2   park rose bang

      Because the note was addressed to Sarah. The woman above her woke her by thumping on her floor/ Sarah’s ceiling, and later blamed Sarah for making noise. It might help if you read the comments from number one down.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   SkySong84

    Maybe they’re playing video games. Hey, it could happen. One semester in college I asked my RA to talk to the people above me about the bed bouncing on the floor at all hours…turned out they were playing rock band and it was the pedal on the drum. That was embarrassing!

    Dec 3, 2009 at 2:45 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   GhostWriter bang

      I have the same problem whenever me and my sorority sisters start playing Kama Sutra for Wii.

      Have you tried the patented inflatable horse-riding controller yet?
      It’s awesome!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:48 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #28.2   pony girl

      Make sure you get the proper size.
      I was sent a clydesdale, when all I needed was a pony size.
      Completely useless.
      and it’s not as if I can return something like that.
      and I can’t figure out any sort of way to discreetly re-use or recycle it either.
      So, it’s in my attic. (I sure as hell am not throwing it away to be found by the garbage guys!)

      Dec 4, 2009 at 3:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Grant

    Gah! What do you do with a note like that? You can hardly pass it on to the correct person because they might see you and think it’s from you.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 3:35 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Chicken Underwear

    I would have posted this to

    http://www.engrish.com/

    Dec 3, 2009 at 5:17 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   John

    This isn’t passive aggressive; it’s direct, and it’s polite.

    Yes, the English is bad. The writer is probably not a native English speaker. It’s so amusing to laugh at people struggling with a foreign language! Especially since we Americans are noted for our mastery of multiple languages!

    Dec 3, 2009 at 5:50 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   JetJackson

      See comment 19 and the responses.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 6:40 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   HappyNat

      John if you are going to be lame, at least try to have a point. It makes it so much more interesting to the reader.

      The snarky Americans are lazy thing is pretty old. Maybe you should up date you lame routine. Have you heard the “you might be a redneck” jokes?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:13 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   Blarj?

    Maybe it’s just me, but I got the feeling it was less direct. It makes sense to me that the person might not want to make their neighbor feel uncomfortable by discussing their loud sex, and it was supposed to be one of those subtle “Oh, there was this strange noise last night…” things.

    There’s only so much subtlety you can pull off with limited English skills, though.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 6:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Hessia

    I think this entry is particularly racist. The person writing this is clearly from a non-English speaking background. The syntactical errors are those made by non-English speaking people. I think it is pretty poor form to pick on people for being a different race, therefore having a harder time with writing in English. Appalling.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 7:37 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   park rose bang

      There are a lot of people commenting on the use of euphemism. Is that also appalling? Number 7, Number 8, 9 and Number 12*, I think, which have all garnered a number of votes all talk about disturb=sex // blaming kids for noise, when the noise was possibly caused by sex, and only one comment takes into account the use of the word ‘disturb’ instead of ‘disturbance’, and in the way of a very gentle piss-take, I think. Why is that racist? 14 and 15 which have also received a lot of votes are about bouncy castles and trampolines and make no, or little reference of the language of the note; they address the content of the note. It is you who is addressing the language. Again, these are the entries with some of the highest votes. The rest of the entries are from time_waster, and our responses to her, and have very little to do with the note at all (sorry, kerry).

      *Oh, number 12 says that the Hours of Disturb would be a good or bad name for a band. Definitely a racist slur. :roll:

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:41 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.2   HappyNat

      I think you are particularly racist. The English in the note is bad, that makes it funny. Nobody cares, or has mentioned where the person is from. It is you who apply racism to the reactions.

      BTW, your lame PC issues are with nationality not race I believe. Do we know the race of the person who wrote the note or the race of the people making fun of said person. What if the person was Swedish Or German? Or a white person born in Nairobi? Or maybe they just came from England and only speak British?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:59 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.3   GhostWriter bang

      Now that a reread the note, it seems exactly like the way they talk on Monty Python.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:39 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.4   Mark bang

      No, it doesn’t. :P

      Dec 3, 2009 at 4:51 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.5   Critical Grass bang

      Too late! Goodnight, ding-ding-ding-ding-ding. Goodnight. Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:51 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.6   Palomon bang

      When did race ever have anything to do with mastering a particular language?
      Reminds me of “Community;”
      Jeff: “Football’s in your blood!”
      Troy: “That’s racist.”
      J: “Your soul?”
      T: “Still racist.”
      J: “Your eyes?”
      T: “That’s gay.”
      J: “That’s homophobic!”
      T: “I’m black.”
      J: “That’s racist.”
      T: “Damn!”

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:35 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.7   Canthz_B bang

      I take exception to calling this racist. It’s more racist to think that persons of a certain race cannot speak any particular language well.

      Unless you’re talking about white people trying to speak “Ebonicly”.
      Please stop that…it makes us embarrassed for you “mofo”s! :-P

      Dec 5, 2009 at 3:07 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.8   pony girl

      What’s appalling is your use of the word ‘racist.’
      You may want to buy a dictionary and a thesaurus.

      Dec 5, 2009 at 8:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.9   CowTippingBlues

      You are clearly a xenophobe, since you think that people that cannot speak English are not of the human race. You envision that only humans are capable of speaking proper English, and that all people not native to the language are of a different race.
      This also makes you a bushwhacker, a polygamist, and a bulemic. Now I’m going to buy a dictionary and see if the names I’m throwing out make any sense at all.

      Dec 6, 2009 at 3:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #34   Hierophantria

    As with others…. this isn’t passive aggressive. And to make fun of some one whose ability with English sucks (it does, so quit complaining) … well.. seems pretty damn funny when its done by people who cannot get the concept of passive aggressive.

    Oh and HappyNat, your ignorance is showing. Speaking British? What? English is English, the traits of HOW is it spoken fall more into the categories of dialect and language traits. Please stop, its comments like this that make the rest of us look stupid.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 9:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   HappyNat

      I wouldn’t worry about me making you look stupid, Hiero my dear. You seem to have that covered all by yourself.

      Next thing you are going to tell me the Germans didn’t bomb Pearl Harbor and that Eli Whitney didn’t invent gin.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 11:30 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #34.2   park rose bang

      Next thing Hiero’s going to be telling us that you need an apostrophe when you contract it and is.
      Geez…

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:04 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #34.3   Palomon bang

      That’s “it” and “is,” perhaps?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 8:37 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #34.4   park rose bang

      That it is.
      Perhaps.
      Define is.
      ;)
      *p.s. you confused me. Did I make a mistake?

      Dec 4, 2009 at 1:28 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   Woman on the Verge bang

    So far we have managed to offend non-native English speakers, children, racists, people who assume that loud noise may or may not equal randy sex and those with poor grammar… oh, and I won’t even mention the slaughter of the haiku. Have I missed anyone?

    The obvious reason for the noise in a vacant apartment is that it is being made by those who no longer dwell in this world. Didn’t you see Paranormal Activity? How about The Grudge?

    Let’s see how long it takes for someone to intimate that ghosts should be quieter having sex or that I have offended the undead with my suggestions…

    Dec 3, 2009 at 9:42 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   GhostWriter bang

      My sexy Grandma died in her house last week, you unfeeling bitch!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 10:39 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.2   Geek Goddess

      I won’t suggest that you have offended the undead. I wouldn’t want to bring that whole thing down on you simply as a result of posting on PAN. But in case you have offended them, you might want to review this:
      http://www1.phillyburbs.com/zombies/zombiesknow.shtml

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:30 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.3   Woman on the Verge bang

      GG, thanks for the pointers. I hope I won’t need them.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 12:59 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.4   aaa bang

      We’re not undead, we’re living dead. :D I have no idea what the vampires would think. They’re a rather strange bunch.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 1:46 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.5   park rose bang

      I was going to say that you didn’t mention that Geek Goddess’ name was taken in vain more than a few times, wotv… but she seems to be a good sport. Nothing like a jolly deity. I wonder where these humourless crawled out from? Have we insulted the humourless yet?

      Dec 3, 2009 at 5:06 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #35.6   Geek Goddess

      I am usually a good sport, but at certain periods of the calendar I need to be appeased with chocolate first.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 7:21 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #36   Neeners

    This note was written by the ghost of Latka Gravis (Andy Kaufman) from the tv show Taxi obviously.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAU6HYpvzUU

    Dec 3, 2009 at 12:03 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   infant tyrone bang

      Tried for a clip of Carol Kane as Simka, but no luck…what duets they had.

      Dec 3, 2009 at 2:23 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   TomJones

    This reads like it was written by Yoda. “Please to be making not the disturb, young Jedi. Not to be used like that, is the force”.

    Dec 3, 2009 at 1:39 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Joe 2

    I’m genuinely surprised the writer didn’t include global coordinates.
    “This happen 158`28.2′ 32.8″ E, 57`12′ 5.2″N
    Mad it is me making!”

    Dec 3, 2009 at 3:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   Neeners

    How do you make your kids ‘less appears’ ?

    Is that a new magic trick or some sort of child abuse?

    Where’s my magic wand…..here we go:

    “abra cadabra sis boom bah loud noisy kids LESS APPEARS” (excessive wand waving)

    OMG! IT WORKED THEY ARE REALLY GONE!!!!!

    Dec 3, 2009 at 8:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   Renagade676

      Why go through all that trouble when duct tape does the job every time? Or, if that fails, there’s always good ol’ fashioned hobbling. Kathy Bates, FTW!

      Dec 3, 2009 at 9:31 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   YorkPeppermintPattie

    What are weather kids and why are they jumping on the bed at 3:43 in the morning?

    Dec 3, 2009 at 10:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Rudolf

    Hey, I’m Time_Waster’s sister, and I am DEEPLY OFFENDED that I am not on the list of Asspandas >.>

    Dec 4, 2009 at 4:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   ashleymc53 bang

    i don’t know & I don’t really give monkeys white ass!!

    Dec 11, 2009 at 8:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   I CAN HEAR YOU IN MY MIND!!!!!! | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] euphemisms of disturb [...]

    Mar 25, 2010 at 10:51 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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