Sheesh, now CG’s probably gonna get in here and pour cold water all over this hot marketing campaign, but whatcha-gonna-do, huh ?

If she lets us run with this, I’m in for the duration and down for the count. If she sez cool it, we probably both need to listen to ‘the voice of reason’.

But if CG nixes it, we should try to talk her into our selling the whole kit-n-kaboodle to some other company for small cash and a big % royalty.

You could call them

—- ——- Swiney
—- ——- Heineys
——- Swipe & Wipes

I don’t know how to do it here, but put the ‘swiney heineys’ in a circle with a line through it (like the ghostbusters.)

Then below that it would say something about how they can be used in different ways. You could keep it on the glass like a toilet seat cover , or you could use it to wipe the glass and other areas of machine clean (it’s coated w/ a special anti-bacterial, anti-fungal, anti-viral )

We could have a promotion where people could send in security tapes of their skank employees caught using the machine in a lewd way. The top prize would win a year’s supply.
Oh, and all the winners would receive complimentary boxes of our other products:
Crab Sacks. (crab in a circle with a line through it.)
To be used to cover mattresses, pillows, comforters, couches, etc. For people who tend to have skanky people over a lot.
and for those people who tend to favor the drive-by BJ, we have custom crab sacks for most vehicle makes and models!

Sorry, that was personal.

ps – i usually put out water, grass and salt. I put a bowl of grass out just for Rudolph, because he’s a bit of a hog, and doesn’t like to share.

Maybe even get some PAN, um, submissions out of the deal.