Writes our anonymous submitter in Minneapolis: “I received this note — and accompanying tater tots — from a co-worker (a balding, 40-year-old male) who had been making false reports about me to our manager and was caught doing so.” (We’re talking hardcore, premeditated sabotage here, so calling himself “a bit of a jerk” was probably “a bit of an understatement.”)
The strangest part, says our submitter? “I do not work in an establishment that serves tater tots.”
related: Daddy’s little smartass

96 responses so far ↓
#1
MAMARILLA2
Lord honey, tater tots don’t make up for any thing. Ever.
Jan 4, 2010 at 11:51 pm rating: 56
#2
AuntyBron
How wrong you are Mama. I’ve been known to choose restaurants based on whether or not they serve tater tots.
Jan 4, 2010 at 11:53 pm rating: 14
#3
Canthz_B
I dunno, when I put Mr. and Mrs. Tater’s tots on my grill and let ‘em smoke low and slow for about six hours all was forgiven in short order.
Bonus…they were never on my lawn again.
Jan 4, 2010 at 11:59 pm rating: 9
#4
lolsuz
This note is an apology; it’s the OPPOSITE of passive-aggressive. Why is it posted on PAN? Are submissions that slow lately?
Anonymous Submitter (AKA Miss Prissy Pants) sounds like a real bitch to me. It wasn’t enough to say that he had been busted making false reports about her; she had to slam his physical appearance too? Who cares how much hair the guy has or how old he is? Someone really superficial and full of herself, that’s who. Dude was throwing his tater tots before swine.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:01 am rating: 18
#5
Palomon
I just read the intro. I take it all back. Messing with someone’s career is pretty crappy.
Team Not Tater Tot Creep.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:01 am rating: 4
#6
Canthz_B
Well gee, overly processed, deep-fried food in an environmentally destructive Styrofoam container.
My arteries thank you…the planet thanks you.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:14 am rating: 4
#7
Palomon
Seemed like a cute apology until I re-read the intro. A grown man lying to the boss is pretty low.
If it was me, I’d refuse the tots, but reluctantly.
Because apology tots are fucking delicious.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:14 am rating: 10
#8
Canthz_B
Yeah, because:
“I nearly cost this woman her job with my lies. What can I ever do to make it up to her to show how sincerely sorry I am? I KNOW!! TATER TOTS!!!”
Just wasn’t getting it for me.
Don’t know why I assumed submitter was a woman. Minneapolis just makes me think Mary Tyler Moore. Tater tots apologies make me think Ted Baxter.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:35 am rating: 1
#9
Flaboy2425
For me, the tots would only add insult to insult.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:41 am rating: 10
#10
Sandi
I think she should reciprocate with a bag of Pork Rinds and tell him… “Thanks for the cold tots… I saw these and they made me think of you.”
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:49 am rating: 20
#11
Canthz_B
If this guy thinks lying to management about a coworker is being “a bit of a jerk”, I shudder to think what he does when he’s “being a real jerk”.
Probably craps in the fitting rooms in department stores and in post office lobby trash cans.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:57 am rating: 13
#12
Mel K
Can we get an update?
I want to know if the tater tots were still frozen or thawed for her convenience.
Did she have to take them home and get the inside of her purse all wet?
That’s passive aggressive, right?
Jan 5, 2010 at 1:19 am rating: 2
#13
Adam
I used to like tater tots back in my elementary school, middle school days. Once I got to college tho, the whenever the dining hall made tots instead of fries I would be sad. Not sure when the change happen. Maybe they just had really good fries. Yea, that’s it.
Good Fries.
Good Night.
Jan 5, 2010 at 1:53 am rating: 6
#14
Silence
Ah, yes. Tater tots do SUCH a splendid job for compensation when some balding twat tries to get you fired.
He could have at least gone for a food item which is still good after it cools off. Tater tots are an utter ruin once they get cold.
Or, y’know, some booze would be fine, too.
Jan 5, 2010 at 2:04 am rating: 4
#15
Wade
I had no idea there was a Sonic® in Minneapolis.
Jan 5, 2010 at 5:40 am rating: 3
#16
Critical Grass
Sorry.
I know I’ve been a bit of a jerk running around telling people you were into bestiality and stealing the company’s money…
Here, have half of my KitKat bar, hope it makes up for my behavior.
ps. May or may not have mentioned you’re the one clogging up the pipes with ‘big jobs’.
Jan 5, 2010 at 8:05 am rating: 17
#17
The Gendarme
Gimme yur tots!
Jan 5, 2010 at 8:28 am rating: 1
#18
RP
No way in Hell am I eating anything from someone who’s been trying to sabotage me. That guy must be nucking futs.
Jan 5, 2010 at 9:11 am rating: 4
#19
Beanster
look. i didn’t mean to lie. i really thought all those things were true. my cat came in and told me that while she was outside of your window she saw you hack in to the company’s online banking and siphon money into your account. after that she said you took off all your clothes and invited the HR guy over and did all sorts of nasty (sexual) things to him, and then did all sorts of nasty (less sexual) things to him. i’m sure there was more but i found little Taboo and she didn’t see any more. i know i shouldn’t have listened to kitty without questioning her story and then reported you. she’s actually a lying bitch and now the company has recommended therapy because i talk to my cat (or that my cat talks to me?). i’m sorry i took her word over yours. to punish her, i took away her favourite, tater tots, and brought them to you.
ps. me and kitty are sill fighting.
Jan 5, 2010 at 9:58 am rating: 5
#20
MAMARILLA2
This all started when they moved his desk away from the window and changed all the office staplers.
Jan 5, 2010 at 10:05 am rating: 2
#21
lady of the (currently frozen) lake
I can’t help but think of how Napoleon Dynamite carried his tots around…wonder whether she opened the container to find tots covered in cheap suit pants fuzz.
Jan 5, 2010 at 10:08 am rating: 1
#22
lady of the (currently frozen) lake
And he thought a Hot Pocket was the perfect gift to give the woman he sexually harassed, ifyaknowhatimean…
Jan 5, 2010 at 10:12 am rating: 1
#23
jaywalke
Tater tots bear the burden of being a disappointing food saddled with a genius name. Who could live up to those expectations?
See also: Blow-Pops.
Jan 5, 2010 at 10:13 am rating: 1
#24
aaa
Don’t really mean it
Lame effort for the bosses
Have some half-ass tots
Jan 5, 2010 at 11:05 am rating: 7
#25
Corn.
I would never eat “tater tots.” My food doesn’t require quotation marks.
Jan 5, 2010 at 12:29 pm rating: 1
#26
Escape Goat
Thanks for the “tater tots.” Here’s some “flaming feces” in a “bag.”
___
Don’t step on it with your boots, Ned.
Don’t tell me my business, Devil Woman!
Jan 5, 2010 at 3:00 pm rating: 3
#27
BonzoGal
Hater Tots!
Jan 5, 2010 at 3:05 pm rating: 4
#28
Crystal
We’ve been doing it wrong all along.
All the world’s problems can be solved with a healthy serving of Tater Tots.
Make tots, not war.
Jan 5, 2010 at 11:49 pm rating: 0
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