Quoth the buzzard, “WTF?”

January 8th, 2010 · 142 comments

Imma cut you off before you start with the “that’s not passive-aggressive” bidness. It’s “WTF Friday,” and anything goes!

First up: Linda spotted this spray-painted notice in front of a dumpster on the streets of San Francisco. “I have no idea what breast cancer trash they are trying to fend off, or what ‘breast cancer trash’ is supposed to mean,” she says.

No...Breast Cancer Trash?

Meanwhile, Susan in Silverdale, Washington did a doubletake when she drove past this sign on her way home one day. (She took a picture, but did not attempt to make good on the offer.)

If your name is bitch come in for a free rose

Austin was similarly disarmed upon spotting this notice outside a shop in Dublin, Ireland.

PERSON (MAN) WITH EXPERIENCE REQUIRED

And longtime troublemaker Wade had a good chuckle when spotted this sign outside a child care center (run by the Addams’ Family?) in Washington, D.C.

When you hear the buzzard pull the door to enter.

related: professionally done by Asians

FILED UNDER: casual sexism · malapropisms · WTF?


142 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Woman on the Verge bang

    When you hear the buzzard… DUCK!

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:24 pm   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   se

      WOV, that comment pretty much lays to rest that particular sign, just ain’t much else better to say about it.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:53 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Woman on the Verge bang

      Thanks, se. I aim to please… I hear the buzzard doesn’t aim at all.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:56 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   infant tyrone bang

      Not AIM as such, but if phone poles’re nearby, they’re good to avoid…

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYw283vgm2w

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:19 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   Escape Goat

      When you hear the duck … chicken

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:04 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   Sirius¤ bang

      OK, I’ll give you a thumb for that. Or a goose.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:38 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   Canthz_B bang

      Ducking may not be the best thing to do. Stooping over just makes easier prey for a butt-buzzard.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 4:26 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   Miss Shackson if You're Nasty

      or easier prey for a thumb.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:37 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Jill Terwilliger

    Can the buzzard tap the window for me?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:25 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Escape Goat

      Window? I’d tap dat! Yo, buzzard, what-what?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:15 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   park rose bang

      One buzzard in the window’s worth two birds in the bush.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 10:48 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   Escape Goat

      Ummm, Ms. Cindy, cleanup, aisle 3.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:02 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   Miss Shackson if You're Nasty

      or a gay guy in the bush wearing a hoodie the color of the sun.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:38 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Gandalf

    Sure… I pressed the button, heard the buzzard, and my escape goat ran off!

    Nevermore, I say!

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:26 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Silence

    Sounds like someone at the flowershop got duh-umped!!

    Incidentally, nothing *quite* compliments the scent of a rose like the stench of bitterness…

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:27 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Tim Kolb

      Looks like a smarty pants got a hold of some sign letters and decided that bitch would be the lucky winner today. These flower shops pick a differant name everyday and did not care to secure the letters very well.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:08 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Escape Goat

      Haha … spelling error … he meant BIATCH.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:14 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Sirius¤ bang

      OK, I’m taking back the thumb.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:42 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Escape Goat

      Siriusly?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   Eh

      Nah. The flower shop picture is Photoshopped. If you look closely the B is thicker than the other letters because it was added on. The name was probably Mitch or Fitch before someone altered the photo.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 11:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Andy

    Oh, I’ve got experience alright.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Sirius¤ bang

      And I’m a bitch. Wherefore art my Rose?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:42 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Sirius¤ bang

      There’s a nice hotel in Silverdale that resembles the Edgewater – not sure if they let you fish from your room or not.

      /gratuitous Mudshark reference

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Escape Goat

      How ’bout a bitch (woman) with experience? Rose? Job? Work for a rose?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:13 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   Sirius¤ bang

      CRAP!!! I just googled the mudshark, and the Urban Dictionary remembers the Mudshark Incident differently than I do. I was totally going for the Led Zeppelin/Frank Zappa/VANILLA FUDGE urban legend, not the Urban racist definition that’s supposedly cool nowadays.

      \damn kids today
      \\Get off my lawn
      \\\Centrally Scrutiniz’d

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:37 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   park rose bang

      ‘s okay, Sirius¤ Wikipedia and Snopes back you up…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 9:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   oi bang

    Person of any race with blonde hair, blue eyes, fair skin and having KKK experience is required. We do not endorse racism here.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:31 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   park rose bang

      It is Ireland, oi. Those kinds of signs were put their way in England to prevent them from working/renting. But, just to keep in the swing of things: Person of any race with dark hair, blue eyes, pasty skin and a few teeth (dark Irish and redheads can also apply). Raging alcoholics are Okay (otherwise no-one would apply). Women should be at home looking after their 16 young ones .

      Nothing like perpetuating stereotypes. ;)

      Apologies if it’s a cross-continental parody.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:16 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   Canthz_B bang

      Blonde Hair…hair dye…Check.

      Blue eyes…brand new color contacts secured…Check.

      Fair skin…made appointment with Michael Jackson’s dermatologist…Check.

      KKK experience…nice knot Jim Bob, whatcha plan on doin’ with that rope?…Check please!

      Jan 8, 2010 at 9:20 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Meg C.

    if my name is Bitchy McBitcherson, do I get two roses?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:31 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Last name, Bitch- First name, Cast Iron.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:44 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   Gandalf

      Is she any relation to Cast Rating?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   Escape Goat

      An Irish Rose

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:17 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   Neeners

      I wouldn’t be a bitch if I didn’t have to go in and get my own rose. Nothing screams pathetic like buying myself flowers and then pretending someone else got them for me. Not that I ever did that or anything…

      Jan 9, 2010 at 12:06 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Sparkles23 bang

    My momma done told me
    A buzzard is two faced

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:32 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      What’s up Doc?

      Jan 10, 2010 at 11:15 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Critical Grass bang

    Okay, press the door bell to enter, after you hear the buzzard pull the door, if you don’t hear the buzzard, tap on the window. If after all that you still you don’t hear the buzzard and can’t open the door just give up, we don’t like you and don’t wanna let you in. Get over yourself.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:36 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Geek Goddess bang

      I don’t hear the buzzard tap on the window.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:29 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   park rose bang

      Damn vultures!

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:20 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   infant tyrone bang

      Like a (supersonic) V-2 rocket spitting thru the sky and coming down on London, if you hear it hit, you’re still alive. The dead never heard a thing.

      http://www.buzzardbait.org/Assets/Images/gary_larson_cartoon.jpg

      “Talk about adding insult to injury! Not only did we arrive late, but they deliberately left his organ-donor card.” ~by Gary Larson

      Jan 8, 2010 at 7:35 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Critical Grass bang

    Please, no breast cancer trash! Regular trash is okay, though.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   oi bang

      and no “spitting” either.

      ok I know.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   Woman on the Verge bang

      I’m picturing a dumpster overflowing with pink ribbons and discarded implants…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:44 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   unholyghost2003 bang

    What exactly does a buzzard sound like? I am sure they make some sort of noise, but much like the giraffe I have no idea what that sound is. What do I do if I hear the buzzard but don’t recognize it?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:42 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      It’s like a hearing test. Meow=do not enter.
      Some kind of cawing noise =all clear.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   unholyghost2003 bang

      how do I differentiate from a hawk?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:57 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   Woman on the Verge bang

      That’s your problem. Maybe you should just skip right to window tapping… or call an ornithologist to go with you.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:07 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.4   Bunnee

      But, to make this more complicated, shouldn’t there be some type of code we’re tapping on the window? You know, like “knock twice, wait a beat, then knock once more”?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:27 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.5   Geek Goddess bang

      Knock three times on the ceiling…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:06 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.6   Bunnee

      I knew I could count on you, GG! ;)

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:10 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.7   infant tyrone bang

      Oh, my sweetness
      tap…tap…tap
      means you’ll meet me in the hallway.
      Twice on the PIPE
      Means you’re noddin’ with Poe

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:15 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.8   park rose bang

      Twice on the pipe
      Means you’re hawking,
      And I’m not talking about Stephen.
      Maybe referring to oi’s comment at 10.1.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.9   infant tyrone bang

      Well, Stephen Hawking appears to be open to the short-term existence of White Holes that emit/spit the same matter their tarry (tarry night) Black Hole counterparts suck in. JFGI

      Based on this correspondent’s experience with the Black Holes of tarry pipes, any mapping of that theory onto the spitting events at Bama is highly speculative…either them southern boys had some low density tar or they’re flat-out Hook-em-hornier than the Texas fans at a UT/OU game.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.10   park rose bang

      Which one do I google? Van Gogh? or Hawking? or Jefferson Airplane? or Lewis Carrol? or Kubla Khan? Your first paragraph was pretty easy to follow, ty, old chum. 2nd one not too difficult either… my entry just a lesser tangential on the greater tangential, but no, I will never fly quite as high as thee.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.11   infant tyrone bang

      40 physics JFG “black hole/white hole” or “white hole”

      40 tarry tarry night, dat’s Don McLean’s “Vincent”

      40 tarry Black Holes (w/o Vincent), dat’s a popular recreational with the same name as a YSL perfume

      Oh, you’ll get some altitude as you age, young’un…

      Jefferson Airplane ?
      Try Waylon, who could have died in the crash with Buddy Holly, et al.
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSdU3HfknRg

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.12   Palomon bang

      Ty-
      Did you say Hooker Hornier?

      Jan 9, 2010 at 12:11 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.13   infant tyrone bang

      Palomon-
      No, it was meant the way I wrote it (not saying I don’t do a typo here + there, but that wasn’t one).

      Refer to the Management’s “P.S. Hook ‘em Horns” below the “Bama Bombs” Note.

      PAN Mgt. is in Austin, home of the UT (Long)horns.
      Hook-em-Horns is similar to “Roll Tide” + others.
      UT/OU rivalry is legendary, epic, etc.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 12:32 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.14   Geek Goddess bang

      Are we talking some kind of football or basketball or something here?

      Jan 9, 2010 at 1:05 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.15   infant tyrone bang

      If it’s Texas, it’s football…occasionally basketball or baseball,
      but football is (as I hear the porn folks call it) the money shot…

      Jan 9, 2010 at 1:53 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.16   park rose bang

      ty – rabbit holes, black holes, white rabbits, glory holes … unless I’m all confused. no doubt. it was your reference! (though a few unravelled threads back). alice in wonderland, caterpillars, hookahs … you know, visitors interrupting trains of thought… re: buddy holly, that’ll be the day, pilgrim…

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.17   MAMARILLA2 bang

      One pill makes you larger , and one pill makes you small…

      Jan 9, 2010 at 8:42 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.18   infant tyrone bang

      Being an elder stakesman, I’d like to put an option in for the former (heaven is blue, Max!).
      Don’t need it right away, but having taken the latter some decades ago,
      I’m always looking ahead.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 9:36 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.19   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Are you, er… blueish? You don’t LOOK blueish.

      Jan 10, 2010 at 11:19 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.20   infant tyrone bang

      Nah, I just gotta get made up + dress this way cuz of bizness.
      I’m Sir Paul’s Viagra connection.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6SSR3YY-rc&feature=PlayList&p=9F6F3102826B7CF9&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=5

      Jan 10, 2010 at 2:19 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.21   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Sooo..Business is a bit stiff then?

      Jan 10, 2010 at 3:02 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.22   park rose bang

      A bit hard to come by?

      Jan 11, 2010 at 3:10 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.23   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Every day a bit longer and harder?

      Jan 15, 2010 at 11:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   oi bang

    breast cancer trash = socks?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:44 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   infant tyrone bang

      oi!,
      Not only in that sense, but also consider the aroma and structural integrity of a pair of socks freshly (?!) returned from a 60-mile, 3-day walkathon…

      Not like the walls on a UofA shower, but even dumpsters have standards.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Hammer

    Breast Cancer Trash: I am envisioning the scene from Fight Club where Norton gets slimed by liposuction waste – except this time Tyler Durden helping him dispose of the bio-hazard goo into the dumpster.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:46 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   park rose bang

      Being kind of serious, as it is breast cancer waste, I’m thinking the needles from fine needle apertures, or possibly chemo waste (I guess there would be some). Or as wotv said above, what happens to the boobs once they get lopped off?

      Now, back to the more interesting speculation…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:29 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Critical Grass bang

    Gay person (Man – everybody knows women don’t call themselves ‘gay’) with experience in looking for pussies in bushes required.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 3:46 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Sirius¤ bang

      Person with (Man) experience required…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:50 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Ethrdg

      Additional requirements: Hoodie the color of the sun (must be supplied by applicant) and some peeking experience.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:52 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   oi bang

      don’t you mean “peeing” experience…………

      Jan 8, 2010 at 3:56 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.4   Critical Grass bang

      Maybe some “spitting” experience…

      Oh, and Ethrdg, the correct color for the hoodie is “color of the fucking sun”, okay? Okay.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:05 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.5   Ethrdg

      Sun, Fucking sun… Po-tay-to, po-tah-to….

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:17 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.6   Escape Goat

      Hi all, this is Ms. Cindy, please stop spitting on the window, thanks.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Hmmm

    Bitch Please! … come in for a rose.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:00 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   infant tyrone bang

      Only if it’s The Yellow Rose of Fucking Sun-drenched Texas !

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:45 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   anglophile bang

    So some bufflehead got a word wrong. Jeeze, you’d think it was some sort of cardinal sin or something the way you people are crowing about it. Somebody makes a bit of a booby out of themselves, and you are all so swift to snipe at them. Have a flicker of compassion, can’t you? You’ve never had to swallow your words because you said something that made you look like a turkey? I’m sorry to grouse like this, I suppose you think I’m raven, but sometimes you all act like a bunch of loons.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:18 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Sirius¤ bang

      W-T-Flock?

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:31 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Bunnee

      You started a pun thread on a lark, didn’t you, Glo? You silly gull.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:33 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   Geek Goddess bang

      I’m beginning to feel a bit jayded by all these puns. Owl have you know that some of us are not too chicken to call you on this. Nothing you say can budgie me in my opinion.

      *tries to figure out how to work in a pun using green necked lori bird*

      Jan 8, 2010 at 5:12 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   park rose bang

      Your gimlet eye, glo! Your gimlet eye!

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:24 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   infant tyrone bang

      Joe Bob offers to the oddess (t)his worthless, pitiful offering

      ………………….”Canary a Dull Moment”………………..

      There was a St. Patrick’s Day party at the UofA.

      An exuberant, painted celebrant threw caution and clothing to the wind.

      Snapped she was by a cell-phone-handy UK exchange student.

      Though blushing, her predominant hue was GREEN.

      The PIC was enlarged, captioned, and distributed to dorm showers…

      Where she became enshrined and worshiped as the…

      Nekkid green bird, Lori.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 7:55 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   Canthz_B bang

      That’s going to cause the return of snipe hunts, ‘Glo.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:49 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.7   park rose bang

      I know that severus ladies around here would welcome the return of the Snape hunt.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:11 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.8   pony girl

      When does the Snape hunt start? Can ponies join?
      Is he in the US now? It’s pretty snowy over in England right now.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.9   aaa bang

      Do you know how hard it is to be killed by punnage when you’re already dead?

      Jan 9, 2010 at 9:37 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.10   park rose bang

      That’s why we save the deadPAN for you, aaa.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 9:50 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.11   infant tyrone bang

      How hard it is to be killed by….

      Punnage ??
      ……..No clue

      Plumage ??
      …….Uma blinks a made-up, feathery eyelash at me,
      and it’s 50/50 whether I’m waking up to her or St. Peter,
      (or worse) and either is quite OK.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 9:52 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.12   park rose bang

      and pony girl, ponies are centaural to the caper.

      Jan 10, 2010 at 1:07 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.13   infant tyrone bang

      That’s sooo corny, rose….
      But I am restricted to a single thumb.

      So in one universe our uni-corny
      comes out of the white hole looking like

      http://stungeonstudios.com/fantasyc/unicorn.html

      while in another, this guy shows up

      http://images.jambase.com/fans/kurt_van/Icon_Europe72_Front.jpg

      Jan 10, 2010 at 9:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   kpquepasa

    Anyone else start singing “Particle Man” by TMBG when reading the “Person (MAN)” posting?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:30 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   anglophile bang

      “hit on the head with a frying pan”

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:33 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   Bunnee

      No, but I am now….

      Jan 8, 2010 at 4:33 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Havingfitz

    Yes! My name IS Bitch! Thanks for the free rose! Bitches4life!

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:39 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   LolaFalana

    Shouldn’t it be “If your name is Rose, come in for a free bitch?”

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:43 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   park rose bang

      Gimme one of ‘em puppies…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 6:30 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   infant tyrone bang

    If your name is Lenore, come in for a free Black Nemophila.

    This offer will not be repeated !

    Act now and get a special coupon good for 50% off on an embalming fluid change just down the street at Silverdale Jiffy Lube.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 4:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   PANU bang

    That Dublin job is probably a position for a gigolo.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 5:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   Sirius¤ bang

      Veteran bird-watchers thrill at the sighting of PANU on the wing. Her call invites the heart to fly alongside, and her avatar – well, it’s fucking fleur-de-liscious!

      \(who dat?)

      Jan 8, 2010 at 9:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Shelle

    I believe the “Flowers to Go” may be a reference to an Ernest Hemingway quote in which he addressed one of his more harsh female critics. Instead of, ” A rose, is a rose, is a rose” he said, “A bitch is a bitch, is a bitch.” Just a guess.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 5:38 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Escape Goat

      Then he said, “I have mommy issues” and cried himself to sleep.

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:10 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   Ogsy

    Here’s a similar one to “Person (Man) Wanted” from the Grindleford Station Cafe. “Female – nowt to do with government”

    http://bit.ly/8d4yt6

    Jan 8, 2010 at 5:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   jadefirefly

    Ha! I used to live in Silverdale. I always wondered who was in charge of picking out the name of the day.

    This makes me giggle.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 6:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Jess

    The No Breast Cancer sign was put on that dumpster during the Breast Cancer 3-day walk. They didn’t want people throwing all the trash from the walkers in their dumpster.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 7:08 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      As long as we don’t find any trashy walkers in there, I suppose that makes sense…

      Jan 9, 2010 at 8:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   dogsleder bang

    Hey Sirius! Edgewater Inn! Mudsharks! Oh gee…here’s a shout-out to good ol’ Frank Z. I miss ‘im!!

    Jan 8, 2010 at 7:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Sirius¤ bang

      Jazz is not dead — it just smells funny.

      RIP FZ

      Jan 8, 2010 at 8:14 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   Escape Goat

    #2: Oh no, you dih-int!

    Jan 8, 2010 at 7:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Escape Goat

    #4: Window? I’d tap dat! Yo, buzzard, what-what?

    Jan 8, 2010 at 8:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   Runner

    I assumed the flower sign my be reaching out to women in verbally abusive relationships. They need a rose.

    But I guess it’s more likely that someone messed with the sign. That says something about our culture.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 10:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   park rose bang

      Your slip is showing, Runner ;) or you my be right…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 10:46 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.2   Escape Goat

      … I may be crazy (Billy Joel ref.)

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:07 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #29.3   park rose bang

      Escape Goat…if I set them up, I expect you to follow through correctly! (Though maybe people in Glass Houses shouldn’t throw stones).

      I my be crazy…

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:15 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #30   park rose bang

    The key to building a good retirement nest egg for future financial peace of mind is to nurture a buzzard in the window. Start early. Don’t leave it too late. You might be turned off by the fact that it is listed as a Species of Least Concern but this just indicates it is a quiet but steady earner. Often reinvest the carrion you collect and earn to strengthen your young buzzard, via regurgitation, so that you can reap the gains when it comes into maturity. Ever seen how bald a buzzard is? That’s because wise investors use its plumage to feather their nests. The buzzard has very few natural predators, you won’t be sorry. Though sometimes hard of hearing, a healthy and stable buzzard in the window is sure to keep the wolf from the door and the vultures from circling overhead.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 11:07 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   Canthz_B bang

      Species of Least Concern? Does that mean buzzards are not an endangered species?

      Good!! Then it’s okay to keep playing Wring the Buzzard!

      Jan 8, 2010 at 11:47 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #31   Canthz_B bang

    I’ve often wondered why Jerry Springer has never done a show devoted to breast cancer.

    I guess he’s seen sign #1.

    Jan 8, 2010 at 11:40 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Neeners

    What kind of ‘experience’ are we talkin’ here? If it has to be a man then they must be looking for ALOT of experience. Hey, that was just as sexist as the note. I’m such an ass….

    Jan 8, 2010 at 11:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Canthz_B bang

    As soon as Patrick O’Brien hired his wife as HR Manager, his beautiful administrative assistant knew her days were numbered.

    Jan 9, 2010 at 12:09 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   Neeners

    “Bitch, here’s your rose!”
    “Oh honey, how thoughtful, you remembered!”
    “Oh Bitch, you know I love you!”
    (Tears) “God your so good to me.”
    “Nothing but the best for my Bitch! Now go fill up my syringe.”

    Jan 9, 2010 at 12:10 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   Escape Goat

      Freudian-father-figure: You know how we do!

      Jan 9, 2010 at 12:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   Palomon bang

    No Breast, Cancer or Trash.

    What a difference the commas make.

    Jan 9, 2010 at 12:18 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Liz

    Hahaha! Silverdales my hometown….I missed out on a free rose!

    Jan 9, 2010 at 1:35 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #37   Gravity's Rambo

    Hi, your audio ad from ABC is really annoying. No more audio ads please.

    Jan 9, 2010 at 3:50 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #37.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      Oh, just hit mute. Geez.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 8:45 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.2   aaa bang

      Get Firefox and install the NoScript add-on.

      Usually, ads are chosen by the ad service, not the site owner.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 11:12 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.3   kerry bang

      Ugh, I’m sorry. I hate auto-playing audio ads (and seizure-inducing flash ads) too, and I always opt out of them. I’ll lay the smack down on my ad server ASAP.

      Jan 9, 2010 at 2:47 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #37.4   Wade bang

      kerry FTW!!! :mrgreen:

      Jan 9, 2010 at 3:23 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #38   Canthz_B bang

    “Flowers to go” is doing a much better business than their first venture.

    “Flowers to stay” just never took off for some reason.

    Jan 9, 2010 at 4:11 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   aaa bang

    The breast cancer trash sign used a double negative. Does that mean they want us to put “breast cancer trash” in there?

    P.S.

    I think breast cancer trash is classified as medical waste. I’m pretty sure it’s generally considered illegal to just dump it wherever.

    Jan 9, 2010 at 11:14 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Woman on the Verge bang

    Because, really, who wants an inexperienced man person?

    Jan 9, 2010 at 2:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   McCabe

    I should apply. I have 25 years of experience at being a person (man).

    Jan 10, 2010 at 5:05 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Canthz_B bang

    *

    Jan 11, 2010 at 12:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   The Hermit

    watch out in case it’s hungary!

    Jan 11, 2010 at 10:36 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Becky

    I’m a free bitch, baby!

    I really want to know the story behind that sign. Literal LOL on that one.

    Jan 12, 2010 at 9:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   MW

    *picks up my free rose*

    Jan 12, 2010 at 3:02 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   DanielMac

    That buzzard was fucking delicious.

    Jan 15, 2010 at 10:55 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Subliminal self-esteem killers | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] related: Quoth the Buzzard: WTF? [...]

    Mar 10, 2010 at 9:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   For Sale, Cemetery Plot, Never Used | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

    [...] Please, No Breast Cancer trash![...]

    Aug 13, 2010 at 2:13 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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