Dirty, dirty bridesmaids

January 21st, 2010 · 77 comments

“I was forced to go wedding dress shopping with a total bridezilla I know,” writes our submitter in Fredericksburg, Virginia. “Another girl with us is also engaged to be married, and she wanted to try on dresses too. Bridezilla just smiled sweetly and pointed to the sign posted in the dressing room. Her exact words: ‘Sorry, only the bride is allowed, and today is my day.’”

There will be a $75 cleaning fee for wedding gowns being tried on by anyone other than the bride.

Apparently you’d better keep an eye on those shifty bridesmaids when they’re shopping for the bachelorette party, too. (Or else…cow them into submission with more threats of an unenforceable nature?)

Yeah, good luck with that

(Spotted by Molly at “Kitty House” boutique in Irvine, California.)

related: What say you, Emily Post?

FILED UNDER: California · stealing · Virginia · weddings and bridezillas · WTF?

77 responses so far ↓

  • #1   ashmeadow

    They might request more money, but I will probably refuse.

    As for the first note, clearly the boutique is just trying to prevent the plot of Bride Wars from playing out in reality. Because let’s face it, give the Bride above an inch, and she’ll play the part better than Kate Hudson ever did.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   GramPo

      Actually, with this crappy grammar, they’re just requesting “u”, not money. The payment would clearly be 100 times zero ( = zero).

      Jan 22, 2010 at 7:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   LawGeek

      I believe they are expecting the letter U (the character from Sesame Street) to indemnify against theft.

      Feb 6, 2010 at 7:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   Laura

    They will “request” I pay 100x? Well, they can request all they want, but it ain’t happening.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   AuntyBron

      No, that would pretty much have to be court-ordered with years of appeals.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 12:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Enzo

      I think my old neighbourhood’s attitudes have rubbed off on me, when someone “requests” something, it generally used to mean, ‘do it or I’ll break your legs’. Although I doubt a wedding dress shop would be that tangled up with the mob :p

      Jan 22, 2010 at 3:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   Cady

      Enzo, you have no idea.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 5:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   MAMARILLA2 bang

      You still have your fingers on the strings, even now.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 4:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   Idon'tsteal

      Well you might be better off paying it instead of going to jail AND paying bail, lawyer and court fees.

      Feb 3, 2010 at 11:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   shesajem

    well if you have 15 bridesmaids I can understand why they would say that…

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:26 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   oi bang

    oh no worries! they will just request.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   anglophile bang

      I’m worried. What if they also give me a dirty look? Or they might even shake their finger at me.

      Jan 21, 2010 at 9:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   Critical Grass bang

      Maybe they’ll say you’ve been a naughty, naughty girl and give you a spanking.

      Jan 21, 2010 at 10:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   Palomon bang

      …is getting a bit stiff…

      Jan 23, 2010 at 8:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   oi bang

    It’s the store who’s bitchy not the bride and I won’t mind if bride wants little more attention than rest of the crew.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Xenobiologista

      I disagree. The note is understandable if they’re afraid that 6 girls in a tiny changing room stepping on each other’s feet is going to result in soiled or damaged gowns.

      The bride is still bitchy.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 7:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   Kristi of Million Dream Mom

    So… if you steal something, you pay nothing for it, right? And 100 times nothing is…

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   Trish

      Oh! PAY 100 times more! Phew! I thought it was PAT 100 times more. I was concerned about what kind of establishment the “kitty-house/cathouse” was. shiver

      Jan 22, 2010 at 4:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   farcical aquatic ceremony

    So we finally have the answer to the eternal question: “Where does all the time go?” It’s those punk-ass brides-to-be claiming days as ‘theirs’. We’d all be extinct now if it weren’t for the fact that 1/2 of these princesses get divorced, at which point they no longer want to hug those days to their next to their small, greedy hearts.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:38 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   Critical Grass bang

    Oh, for Pete’s sake! Make a real threat!
    Say something like: “If we catch you stealing we’ll call the lex taliionis on you. Still willing to risk it?”
    That would work!

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   park rose

      I’m reading, “We will request you to pat 100 times more”. Guess it depends upon just what they are requested to pat as to whether it’s a real threat or not.

      Jan 21, 2010 at 9:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   farcical aquatic ceremony

    At first I thought the 2nd note was saying something about patting kitties 100 times, which I supposed could be considered a punishment by the feline-averse.

    Then, my (dirty, dirty) brain leapt to–ahem–heavy petting. Properly/completely reading the note & explanation of the nature of the ‘Kitty House’ was a total disappointment.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Shui

    I bet Bridezilla just zeroxed a hundred copies of that notice and put them up in all the bridal stores on the morning of her shopping trip… preparation is the better part of crazy, or words to that effect.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   jetjackson bang

    “Can I steal a try of that wedding gown?”

    Uh-oh spaghetti-o’s!

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   Snim

    What kind of dresses does a boutique called “Kitty House” sell, exactly? And who gets them for her bridesmaids — Jenna Jameson?

    Jan 21, 2010 at 9:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   Critical Grass bang

    If you’re not a bride you’re not allowed to try on the dresses, you’re not getting married and I bet you don’t even have a boyfriend.
    Just get over it!

    Jan 21, 2010 at 10:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   Canthz_B bang

    Getting Pat 100 times at Kitty House actually sounds quite enjoyable. :twisted:

    Jan 21, 2010 at 10:41 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   LordOfThePants

      But they don’t specify a gender to which “Pat” belongs in this note. Buyer (stealer) beware.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 9:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   missloopy

    the wedding is the bride’s “day”, not every freaking planning point leading up to it. your “day” isn’t 6-months long.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 10:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   bug

      for brides like this every day is “their day.” the bride title just lends them an excuse to be brazen about it.

      Jan 21, 2010 at 11:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.2   Rebecca

      Especially since she was not, apparently, the only bride in her little group. Geez. I can understand not wanting to share an appointment, maybe. However, most of the dress shops I went to were very lenient about that sort of thing, so one of my bridesmaids also tried on wedding dresses (yes, she was also engaged, my wedding just happened to be before her’s). Really wasn’t a big deal.

      I HATE the whole “It’s the bride’s special day!” thing. Even as a bride, it got annoying when other people said it. Is it not a special occasion for the groom, as well?

      Jan 22, 2010 at 11:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.3   Scott

      Rebecca: In my experience, the groom has nothing to do with the wedding. It’s all about the bride. The groom only needs to make sure he gets there, does what he’s told, and say the right name at the alter. Other than that, everything is planned, run, and controlled by the bride.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 11:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.4   Palomon bang

      Scott is right. Oh, so right.
      The groom is an ornament. His biggest job is his share of paying off the debt.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 8:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.5   Xenobiologista

      Coming from an Asian perspective…my wedding was about running around trying to make everybody ELSE happy (successfully =) I feel like if you’re going drag a couple hundred people to your hometown and they’re going to cough up ang pau (gift money) you owe them something, at least a good show and a good dinner.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 7:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   Hmmm

    Please tell me that the other person wanting to try on the bride’s gown wasn’t the groom…

    Jan 21, 2010 at 11:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   TippingCows

    The Kitty House? How can they take themselves seriously? I’d be crank calling them like crazy. “Hi, can I talk to Ms. Galore? Yes, last name Galore, first name Kitty. We call her Pussy for short?”

    As for the bride well, I just laugh at her because … she’s getting married, and that’s punishment enough in this life.

    Jan 21, 2010 at 11:14 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   Adam

    No hyperbole here at all.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 12:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   debkatz

    The sign is for a “cleaning fee” charged to anyone other than the bride for trying it on. What is a cleaning charge and why isn’t the bridge charged for it? What needs cleaned? Who’s wearing diapers to try on gowns? Who’s drooling? Who’s hasn’t showered several days and strolling into David’s Bridal shop? I’m so perplexed. ‘Splain yoself Lucy!

    Jan 22, 2010 at 12:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Mel K

      I think that it is the fake tan. All brides wear so much fake tan that they could pass for an oompah-loompah. That stuff rubs off and is really disgusting.

      Why not make anyone wearing fake tan pay?! Why not make everyone wearing fake tan live on their own island.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 2:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.2   Just Me

      Excellent point on the fake tan. I was thinking it was something simpler like cosmetics. How many times have you seen clothes on the rack smeared with somebody’s foundation or lipstick? (Adding insult to injury, the smeared clothing is the only one left in the size you need.)

      Jan 22, 2010 at 10:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.3   kungfulola

      It’s so that the sales people don’t waste their time helping people who aren’t actually in the market to buy a gown. Trying on wedding dresses is like permissible dress-up for adult women, so it’s tempting. I used to work in a dancewear store where we sold pointe shoes. We had to enstate a “fitting fee”, which would be waived if the customer bought a pair of shoes. Teenaged girls kept thinking it would be fun to come downtown for a coffee and try on pointe shoes. Fitting those shoes is very time-consuming, because different makes have different sizing scales, and they are expensive (much like wedding gowns). We couldn’t afford to have these girls waste our time and specialized knowledge for their own amusement.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 3:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.4   zebra

      Maybe this bridezilla wanted all of the attention, then again… wouldn’t you want to try on dresses with your own family and friends? This bridezilla would invite particular women with her and I am guessing the second engaged lady would choose others, even if some were the same.

      Re: Special Day
      So sad… the bride would be nothing without the groom to marry. It should be a special day for BOTH of them. For my wedding I put an end to it quickly out of respect for my husband.

      That and the “who gives this bride away” part. I’m my own individual, I am not property.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 8:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   Mermaid

    Ah! I used to work at the Lollicup right next door to Kitty House in Irvine which at the time was run by the same people. Hilarious.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 12:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Bunnee

      PLEASE tell us how they came up with names like “Lollicup” and “Kitty House”. I’m betting on LSD.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 11:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   Gandalf

      It’s probably one of those lost in translation things.
      What I want to know is why are bridesmaids shopping at the Kitty House for the Bachelorette Party? How old is the bride? 12? The Kitty House has a large selection of the Hello, Kitty! and other such merchandise.
      Seriously, how old is the groom? Where is the bachelor party? Chuckie Cheese?

      Jan 22, 2010 at 11:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   infant tyrone bang

      Sounds like maybe a family wedding planned for Utah,
      or a location with a large Middle Eastern population,

      or just a groom with a hankerin’ for trouble + a Jerry Lee Lewis box set.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 12:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.4   Gandalf

      Yeah…but she left him “breathless”

      Jan 22, 2010 at 2:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.5   Gandalf

      Ironically, IT, Irvine does have a large population of immigrants from the Middle East.
      And the Near East, and the Far East…

      Jan 22, 2010 at 3:12 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.6   infant tyrone bang

      Until recently, I lived about 100 miles south of Irvine for over 20 years and am not unfamiliar with the population + workforce demographics.

      Ironically, I used to work for 2 school districts in So. Cal. (El Cajon) that had the 2nd highest population of Chaldeans in the U.S.

      Chaldeans would be unlikely to have a tween or early-teen wedding, but if you google *underage marriage middle east*, you will see that there are plenty of countries and ethnic/religious groups within them which are OK with brides as young as 8 years (with and without genital circumcision).

      Over 20% of girls in India are married before age 16, despite 18 being the legal minimum, so in case you think that I think this is a Muslim phenomenon, “rest assured” (as my Pakistani friends and customers from an earlier career would say) that I know it’s much wider than that.

      There are patriarchs the world over that need to think of themselves as having Great Balls of Fire…and so few flamethrower operators. Selah.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 5:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   Canthz_B bang

    There’s no cleaning fee if the bridesmaids try on the gowns after they’ve had the bridal shower.
    Though there probably should be a larger fee after some of those shindigs.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 2:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   specificities

    Wellll, I’m kind on Team Bridezilla for the first picture and explanation because there are only so many hours in the day and the other bride can jolly well make her own appointment to try on wedding dresses.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 6:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   usaf wife

      actually, i’m the submitter and i’m married. i agree, people who aren’t getting married shouldn’t be trying on dresses, but if there are two brides at the same bridal store in the same group, i don’t see why they BOTH can’t try on dresses.

      this was a VERY small boutique in our small town, which you don’t make appointments to and no one even helps you. You run around the store and do it all yourself. I could understand if she had made an appointment, but we were the ones carrying dresses around and zipping her up. The owner sat in the front on her cell phone the whole time. -shrugs-

      Jan 22, 2010 at 9:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #22.2   usaf wife

      p.s. – the part i didn’t understand was how is the bride apparently the only clean one? how do other people trying on the dresses somehow magically deem them dirty? Like someone above said, the bridezilla was slathered in fake tan. Regardless after 100 people try on the same dress, it will get dirty.

      The whole thing just didn’t make sense to me.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 9:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   die, fucking fatsos, die!

    I’ll bet they were all fatties, the bridezilla the morbidly disgusting of them all. I’ll bet the entire wedding party looks like an audition for the Biggest Loser.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 7:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   Critical Grass bang

      jinx, is that you?

      Jan 22, 2010 at 8:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   Resident Grammarian esq bang

    After we build your house, if you don’t pay we request that that you pick it up and move it out of our spot.

    After we crash into my car I request that you build me a new one.

    If you skip out on your exorcism bill we request that you reposess yourself.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 7:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   fan bang

    No cleaning fee for the bride? Of course, it will be the only time since high school that she can pretend that she is, “as pure as the driven snow”. She is the only one that should be wearing white. Now she will be putting her past days behind her, let her have this one last moment. In another six months when she gives birth she will at least have the fairytale pictures.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 8:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   kungfulola

      Actually, it’s not the white gown which connotes virginity, but the wearing of a veil. This is a common misconception. Wedding gowns have been all colours, even in times and cultures where virginity was mandatory on the wedding night. Widows who re-married never wore veils for their second wedding.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 3:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.2   zebra

      That is the reason that white is now symbolic of “first wedding” instead of virginity.

      Jan 25, 2010 at 8:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   anglophile bang

    “U” and “THX”? Who’s running the Kitty House? 19 year-olds?

    Jan 22, 2010 at 8:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Canthz_B bang

      Really happy 19 year-olds, ‘Glo! :-D

      Jan 22, 2010 at 8:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #26.2   Pterosaur

      THX Sandra is working part-time at the Kitty House to make ends meet. Times are tough all around. See Casey in HR for your 100 pats.

      Jan 22, 2010 at 9:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   Tasha

    There were two brides. Someone should shred Bridezilla’s rancid little heart.

    Jan 22, 2010 at 9:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   Pers

    Caught stealing? Sorry buddy, you owe us ONE MILLION DOLLARS!


    Jan 22, 2010 at 11:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Nikki

    What to do, what do to…
    Point out how every dress makes her look fat: Oh, that one’s total back fat. Oooh, that one is all muffin top. That one makes your arms look thick…

    Or tell her the most hideous, unflattering one of the bunch makes her look beautiful and that she’d better buy it now so she doesn’t risk the store not carrying it any more.


    Jan 22, 2010 at 3:04 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #30   storytellerdoc

    I’m glad I’m a guy…LOL…we just swat each other on the back and it’s over…I just hope the bridesmaid looks better in the same gown bridezilla buys!

    Jan 22, 2010 at 3:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #31   aaa bang

    Look at me, fuckers!
    Damn! I’m so fucking special!
    The day never comes…

    Jan 23, 2010 at 12:40 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #32   Allie

    I think the first sign is meant for people who are not engaged. Think about it: someone who’s not engaged/not a fiancee tries on a wedding dress, and possibly gets it dirty. She’s already not buying the dress, so they charge a cleaning fee. If a bride tries it on, the store owners know the woman is seriously considering the dress, and will probably pay for any cleaning needed after the client tries it on (and before the dress is picked up). That’s just part of owning a wedding-oriented business. Or else the bride that ends up buying the dress will probably pay for any needed alterations to the gown, including a dress cleaning. The sign is most likely just a deterrent to women who aren’t serious about buying a dress. In the case of the poster, I would say that (in the eyes of the establishment) ANY bride can try on a dress without a fee, and isn’t limited to the option of having to make her own appointment.

    Jan 23, 2010 at 5:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   karen

      Maybe you’ve never gone wedding dress shopping. First, the average number of dresses you try on is probably close to 30. Just put them all on and cry a little. Second, you don’t buy the one you try on — that’s just a store model, and they have to order one for you. The ones they have in the store are ginormous sizes so that fat girls can fit into them, and then everyone else has to use these vice clamps to cinch them up to see how they would look if they actually fit. Those model dresses get completely trashed.

      Plus, it’s fun to have your friends try on a few while you’re shopping. What could possibly be the harm in that? This sign is just PA and bridezilla at its worst.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 10:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.2   appleecho

      I should vice clamp your self-righteous skinny ass.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 12:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #32.3   Allie

      @karen, you’re right, i’ve never been wedding dress shopping. i rescind my comment. :)

      Feb 1, 2010 at 3:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #33   Renagade676

    How is she a bridezilla? She called and made the appointment, she’s (or her fiance’s) paying to get fitted, and she has to pay for any snares, rips, or stains that appear on any of the dresses she tries on.

    I say it’s okay to be self-indulgent when you’re getting prepared for your wedding.

    Last time I checked a bridzilla was a malicious woman who expected perfection from everyone around her to the point of having a temper tantrum when something goes wrong.

    Jan 23, 2010 at 6:30 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   aaa bang

      The submitter didn’t say trying on dresses made her a bridezilla, she said she went trying on dresses with a bridezilla. You can’t fit a laundry list of shitty behavior not relevant to passive aggressive notes on a PAN description, they’ll get cut. Besides, that’s why they have sites like Etiquette Hell.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 12:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.2   oi bang

      aaa, are you Miss Jeanne? this is the third time you have linked this site here.

      Jan 23, 2010 at 4:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #33.3   aaa bang

      Nope. I’m too young and too much of a douchebag. But I do really enjoy reading about the douchebaggy things other people do. :D

      Jan 23, 2010 at 11:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #34   Joe 2

    “…so keep the Mitchum anti-perspirant handy. OKAY?”

    Jan 23, 2010 at 9:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #35   Fanboy Wife

    Does the cross-dressing groom have to pay the extra $75?

    Jan 24, 2010 at 8:26 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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