“Personally, I think all places should post this sign,” says Molly in Los Angeles.
These days, it appears a lot of cash register-operators agree with Molly (and the fancy shop in Studio City where she buys her cheese).
To wit: exhibit a, from Betsey in Sumter, S.C.
Exhibit b) spotted by Otto at a sandwich shop in Frisco, Colorado
And so on and so forth.
But I’d like to draw your attention to this piece, spotted by Jenna at a Pathmark pharmacy in Bayshore, New York, as a true masterpiece of the genre. With just a few carefully crafted words, it transforms this common sentiment into the ultimate in shame-inducing passive-aggression.
related: Top five musical crimes perpetrated by record store customers in the 90s and 2000s




196 responses so far ↓
#1
Beanster
sure. i can get you a latte and your sister is such a bitch. no problem.
have a great day!
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:48 pm rating: 23
#2
Wade
Sadly, they are so absorbed in their conversation they won’t read the notes.
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:49 pm rating: 46
#3
DC
How about the spider monkey behind the cash register who is more then a little pissed off at themselves and their poor decision making skills that lead them to a fate where the most often repeated phrase from their mouths are “here is your change” stop being smirky, STFU just ring up my bagel with cream cheese and coffee with a smile.
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:51 pm rating: 27
#4
Jor
ouch!
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:51 pm rating: 2
#5
Gunderson
I’m enjoying reading all these signs while I’m talking on my cellphone.
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:54 pm rating: 9
#6
JC
The thing about it is, a lot of places where I see these signs, I also see employees who think nothing of basically ignoring customers in favor of continuing their own conversations. They’ll complete my entire transaction without meeting my eyes or saying anything to me.
Where’s the difference?
Or if a customer was having an inperson conversation, “I’m sorry, I’m not helping you until you end your conversation.”
Feb 25, 2010 at 3:55 pm rating: 16
#7
Mo®
You are using Bonetti’s Defense against me, ah?
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:05 pm rating: 9
#8
Lisa
The worst is when people roll up with bluetooth headsets and you think they’re talking to you (or themselves). They’re the one hearing a voice in their head, and somehow that makes YOU the crazy one.
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:06 pm rating: 46
#9
Woman on the Verge
That sign is so cool. Hold on, I have to call someone and tell them about it.
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:07 pm rating: 13
#10
LB
As a former cashier, I have to side with Team Behind-the-register. Nothing worse than trying to take someone’s order or ask them a question while they are off in their own little world pretending like you don’t exist.
These are usually the same people that end up giving you a dirty look or complaining for repeating yourself a little louder or not handling their order right. In the time it takes you you get pissy with the register clerks, you could have just said, “I’ll call you back. *click*”
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:17 pm rating: 27
#11
kittencake
the worst thing in the pub i work in is when people come to the bar, order their drink, and then TURN AROUND WITH THEIR BACK TO ME and continue their conversation with a group of people. if it took me three hours to pour a pint, i would understand. but it doesn’t. i’m a human, not a bloody drink-mixing robot.
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:23 pm rating: 10
#12
Bunnee
Well, I’ll be. Someone actually did put clip art on a handwritten sign by drawing little pictures! (plus stylized letters, underlining and exclamation points)
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:44 pm rating: 7
#13
Adam
These signs are fairly rude and I don’t think that they are very effective.
Feb 25, 2010 at 4:59 pm rating: 4
#14
the Librarian
Believe me, it’s not just the cashiers who would appreciate it if you would get the fuck off your phone already. The people standing in line behind you would love it, too.
I think I might have to put a sign like this on my reference desk.
Feb 25, 2010 at 6:01 pm rating: 40
#15
debkatz
People, people…yikes! Mobile phone users push a lot of buttons! Many people dislike overhearing loud conversations while standing in line. People behind the counter wish to speak directly to the person giving their order. I think there is a reasonable middle ground…not that a reasonable middle ground has ever been witty or funny, however. How about this: when giving your order, stay off the phone, be clear and concise, and let the person do their job. And now, person making coffee-get a grip. You’re being paid to make coffee, and not being babysat. If the person looks down, or reads a newspaper, or talks to the person next to them, what’s it to you? You’re generally chatting with the person YOU work with, right? If people are going to talk on the phone, keep the volume down, look your service person in the eye and be polite. See, it’s not funny OR witty. IT’S JUST REASONABLE.
Feb 25, 2010 at 6:57 pm rating: 8
#16
kmd
To all the folks disparaging the workers behind the counter as somehow beneath the requirements of common courtesy:
I hope you’ve noticed that the grammar, punctuation, spelling, sentence structure and courtesy in every last one of these notes shows a level of literacy and consideration sorely lacking in the average PAN … and in all of the comments from the disparagers.
IOW, STFU n00b.
Feb 25, 2010 at 7:29 pm rating: 18
#17
Hannah
I’m a cashier and I really don’t mind if people are on their cell phones. It doesn’t bother me at all. AT ALL.
Feb 25, 2010 at 7:31 pm rating: 4
#18
Tammy
I work next to a store in MA that has a sign on the front door that says, “Please don’t use your cell phone in this store, the rest of us don’t need to know what is going on in your life.” Now, here’s the best part: Typically, you have to wait a couple minutes for the high school age cashier to finish her cell call before she rings you up…Thank you Cardsmart.
Feb 25, 2010 at 8:26 pm rating: 6
#19
matty-wat
I love the hand lettered artistry of the sign from Frisco.
Feb 25, 2010 at 9:00 pm rating: 4
#20
Critical Grass
Dear costumer,
If you don’t get off your phone we’re gonna sneeze on your food.
That’s right!
Thank you.
Feb 25, 2010 at 10:03 pm rating: 2
#21
Canthz_B
It’s about time someone explained their old slogan: “The Pathmark Promise”.
Feb 25, 2010 at 10:11 pm rating: 0
#22
Critical Grass
If you’re too busy to get off the phone, don’t worry! Check the other line, we’re ready to take your order!
I bet now you think you have problem, right?
Feb 25, 2010 at 10:22 pm rating: 1
#23
Sean
It doesn’t matter what level of education a service employee has, or how he or she “ended up” there. In a brief, routine social transaction, it is simply courteous to make some eye contact and give (mostly) undivided attention.
Some commenters point out instances of discourtesy behind the counter as though these absolve the customer of any obligation to display manners. Obviously, it works both ways.
I don’t enjoy rude/mute/apathetic people, whatever side of the counter they (and I) happen to be on.
Talking on your cellphone while interacting with someone directly providing you service is rude. It is. It really is. Rather than getting defensive about it, just make this little compromise.
Feb 25, 2010 at 10:33 pm rating: 29
#24
JuliaJolie
I’ve been on both sides of this situation, but working in department stores and clothes shops. It is annoying, but not to the point where I’d put up a rude, off-putting notice about it.
I don’t have a cellphone anymore, but when I did, I always told the person on the line “hang on, I’m at the counter, I don’t want to be rude (to the cashier)”. But a few times I’ve noticed cashiers treat ME like a piece of crap that’s beneath their little pimply-faced existence.
The other day, a piece-of-zygote-cashier at a shop in the mall was chatting to a group of 5-6 of his annoying hipster friends who were crowding the cash register and not buying anything. I waited for 10-15min in line (and I was the only one in line) and when he started talking he was actually making eye contact with me but actually talking to his co-worker behind him! I didn’t say a damn word or even look angry. His co-worker told him he’d talk “after you finish the transaction”….
Maybe it’s just because I’m foreign, and from a country where there isn’t such a ridiculous rich/poor dichotomy, but I really just wanted to smack this little shit in the face.
Feb 25, 2010 at 10:34 pm rating: 7
#25
TippingCows
I think everyone should work a retail and/or food service job for at least a month. It gives one a lot of perspective on how the average Joe regards the rest of the world. It will also change your view on how to treat the people that bring you your food or ring up your sales.
That being said, if a server or cashier is ignoring you or being rude to you without any provocation, you have a right to grumble back at them! But I always tell the person on the other end of the phone to hold on when I am ringing something up. Then again, I am rarely ever talking on the phone in public, too. I just don’t want people hearing my conversations, I guess.
Feb 25, 2010 at 11:15 pm rating: 10
#26
Canthz_B
Listen closely, all I need to hear from you is: “That’ll be fiftyy eight-ninety five. Cash or charge?”
Just push the buttons with the right pictures on them and I’ll be on my way, moron!
Because that’s the way the world is supposed to work.
Feb 26, 2010 at 3:44 am rating: 1
#27
krista
I had a woman sit in my section during lunch a few months ago. She placed her conference call on speaker phone, and set it on the table. When my section filled up, she turned her phone up even louder to hear over the other diners. She ignored me through the whole meal, pissed of her friends, and annoyed a whole section at one time.
I think it’s safe to say, that some people have no regard for the comfort of others. Whether they be an uneducated, zit faced, hipster, spider monkey (?) waitress, like myself, or a diner with a “real” job, education, a fancy suit, and ambition in life.
Feb 26, 2010 at 7:12 am rating: 7
#28
park rose
Cords in photos one and three seem to be the order of the day, which is kind of ironic, taking the subject matter into account. You can go all Morissette on me if you wish.
Feb 26, 2010 at 7:40 am rating: 2
#29
Havingfitz
I work in a call-center. This is not a “poor life choice”, it is my choice. I enjoy it and the job works for me. You don’t know how many times people call for help, and then immediately put me on hold so they can finish their cell-phone conversations. But woe unto you if YOU put them on hold to look something up for them. If you want my help, call back when you actually have the time to tell me your problem.
Feb 26, 2010 at 8:03 am rating: 8
#30
aaa
What? I can’t hear you!
Ugh! This douchebag is talking
It’s debit, you dolt
Feb 26, 2010 at 10:00 am rating: 2
#31
Wordtinker doesnt smith
Team I-wish-cell-phones-and-credit-cards-had-never-been-invented.
Feb 26, 2010 at 10:02 am rating: 7
#32
Kohoutek
I work in a bookshop because I like it. I like being surrounded by things I love and the people who work there are the nicest and generally most intelligent bunch I’ve met in a long time.
It was pretty quiet the other day so I was trying to get some books out on the shelves, so not behind the cash desk. This guy came in and to get my attention, instead of coming up and saying (as I do when I go into shops in that situation) “Can I pay for this please?” He stood at the counter and shouted “SHOP!”. He then proceeded to talk on his phone all the way through the transaction.
I still said please and thank you and gave him the right change. The fuckwit.
Feb 26, 2010 at 12:25 pm rating: 11
#33
skippy
Customers gabbing on the phones is so annoying. Is it that difficult to put it down for twenty seconds and interact with me? It’s especially bad when they’re talking on the phone, then looking straight in my eyes. I have no clue who what they’re saying is directed to.
Feb 26, 2010 at 12:54 pm rating: 4
#34
seamstress
Geez, get over yourselves you hothouse flowers.
Feb 26, 2010 at 12:54 pm rating: 1
#35
sarah
im enjoying the thought that just because someone hasn’t achieved the same level of success as you, you are allowed to treat them however you wish. though it may result in some level of scarring on the brain stem from the high level of elitist douchbaggery it brings.
Team Courtesy Doesn’t Have Status Restrictions!
Feb 26, 2010 at 12:57 pm rating: 14
#36
lotell
I work hurricanes, and occasionally you will get some loud obnoxious troublemaker in the crowd waiting for food and water. My policy has always been to ask them to step out and come for a little walk. We walk I listen to him (hardly ever a woman), then once we are at the perimeter of the area I tell them that since we got back from Iraq some of my guys are a little jumpy, please don’t come back because they will shoot you.
Strangely these characters don’t come back.
Feb 26, 2010 at 1:00 pm rating: 16
#37
Neal
Cell phone use in public is generally annoying…… on the other hand…….. I’m not going to bother with someplace that post signs about how they are not go to take your money unless you share some pet peeve they have.
Feb 26, 2010 at 2:50 pm rating: 3
#38
Kayley
Honestly, I’ve never thought this to be rude.
I work as a sales associate in Old Navy, and people talk on their phones all the time. I’m perfectly alright with it. I don’t see it as an insult at all.
I’m a texter, not a talker, but I’ve never considered being on the phone to be rude. I mean, it’s one thing if a cashier is trying to talk to you, but if he/she is just ringing stuff up, why not? And I’m saying this from the perspective of a cashier. Sometimes people come in with $500 worth of clothes that take 5 minutes to ring up. If a person doesn’t want to talk, I’m not going to force him/her to talk. It’s his/her decision. It’s not like he/she is doing it on purpose to offend me.
I will probably consider it more now…I’m so busy that I try to fit in phone calls whenever I can. I don’t want to offend anyone though. What do you guys think about when a person is on the phone, but pauses his/her phone conversation while purchasing his/her products? Is that alright? Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever talked on the phone while ordering something, but it could happen. I wouldn’t even have a second thought. And no, it’s not because I don’t respect the cashier. I have a great amount of respect for the diversity of choice that each person makes in his/her life; besides, I am a cashier, and I love being a cashier! As long as I tell a cashier what he/she needs to know about my order, I don’t see what the problem is. It’s fine to me when others do that while I’m cashiering.
Like some people have said, it’s a business transaction. As long as the details of the transaction have been ironed out, what’s the problem? I definitely take my cashiering beyond the level of being only a transaction, but I’m fine with it if my customers desire nothing more.
Feb 27, 2010 at 12:52 am rating: 5
#39
Joan of Argghh!
I used to smile at them and hand them their receipt and say, “Here you go. And thanks for the $20 cash back!”
They walked away with a stupid nod, still clueless as to their transaction. I never actually did it, just said it to prove a point. Just sayin’ it now to perhaps wake someone up. If I can think of such a thing, someone else is surely doing such a thing to unwitting cell phone freaks.
Feb 27, 2010 at 7:58 am rating: 3
#40
Fanboy Wife
I like these!
Feb 27, 2010 at 8:47 am rating: 0
#41
Maria
It’s hysterical how irrational some store clerks are about this — to the point of posting signs advertising their utter lack of reasoning skills, courtesy, or work ethic.
I have yet to see one of these idiots self-righteously insist you stop talking to your shopping companion before they will permit you to hand over money. That betrays the real motive here — the irrational resentment of people who have cell phones. I don’t know why that’s still around — they’ve been cheap for years, and are hardly an ostentatious status symbol — but some people still can’t think rationally about/around them.
I don’t use my cell phone when I’m in stores, period, whether I’m interacting with a clerk or not, because that isn’t why I have it. But I’m rational enough to recognize that humans can exchange a few words with others — present or not — in between greeting a store clerk and handing over their money.
Feb 27, 2010 at 3:04 pm rating: 1
#42
Sammie
I’ve worked on the other side of the counter in the past, and have to admit it, I find it extremely rude if the person I’m serving is on the phone or talking with a friend at the time. (Another pet peeve is throwing the money on the counter instead of putting it in my outstretched hand).
On the other hand, as a customer, I find it very painful to be served by someone who’s busy chatting with her (usually this is a girl thing) friend about her weekend, her boyfriend, her school, her whatever whilst serving me.
I don’t often particularly want to have a long conversation with my server, but eye contact, please and thank-you go a long way to making a shopping experience a good one.
It seems to be a forgotten art, on both sides of the counter, and infuriates me each time I witness it. All this talk of spitting in coffee doesn’t help either. Who’re you kidding here? You took the job, and unfortunately, there are some arseholes out there. It doesn’t mean you can be one too….
Feb 27, 2010 at 3:55 pm rating: 3
#43
PJ
I deal with this at my work as well. When you’re talking on the phone and I’m ringing you up, there are things I’m required to say as a cashier. Things like “Hi, did you find everything okay?” “That’ll be six twenty-eight.” “May I see a picture ID?” “I just need a signature right here.” “Here are your receipts and your card. Have a great day!”
Am I supposed to talk over your phone call or wait for a lull in your conversation? Should I say anything at all? Half of the time they don’t hear me say the total, end up having to cover the speaking end on their phone and ask, “how much was it again?”
It’s awkward.
Feb 27, 2010 at 9:06 pm rating: 3
#44
Steven
You people are all sick in the head and have got too much time on your hands.
Feb 28, 2010 at 4:40 am rating: 0
#45
Marie
If you want me to pay attention, then I surely expect you to pay attention to me. Don’t talk to other workers when I’m at the cash register. I don’t give a rip about when your break is, what party you went to, etc etc. I once had a cashier never say hello or even tell me what my total was, all while chatting with a co-worker about who should be promoted to assistant manager. As I left I said, ” I wouldn’t hire either one of you.”
Mar 1, 2010 at 9:50 pm rating: 1
#46
baristaplusstudent
I’m a barista at Starbucks AND a student at a fairly prestigious university. I work at a coffee shop in an attempt to avoid student loans. I’m NOT working there because it’s all I have in my life … I’m hoping to be well into my career within the next few years. So, there’s my response to the (unfortunately abundant) statement that ‘people who work in customer service are just there because they’re too stupid to have a decent job’.
People who talk on their phones when they come up to my till automatically get decaf. I don’t care what they order … the more caffeinated their request is, the better. They have no right to treat me like a sub-par human being because I am currently ’serving’ them. The urge to disrupt service to these people (as they are in the process of disrupting MY day) is so severely strong that I have been known to charge people extra (since they’re not paying me any attention anyway) on top of refusing them their caffeine (without their knowledge).
And for the record, not all coffehouses employ lazy, self-involved workers. Every single person I work with is attentive to the customer’s needs first and foremost. I’m sorry a lot of you have experienced shoddy customer service, but when the service is good (as ours is) and every customer is greeted with a warm smile, a “hi, how are you today?” and all attention is on them, and they STILL insist on talking on their phones instead of speaking to the flesh-and-blood people in front of them, all I can say to them is a big FUCK YOU in my head. What an inconsiderate thing to do.
Say what you want about employees in the service industry. The vast majority of us are just hard-working people like everyone else, and we wish to be treated like people, as well. And if you refuse me that simple right, I will simply refuse you the right to your fucking coffee, you yuppie dicks.
Mar 2, 2010 at 11:55 am rating: 10
#47
Mo®
sometimes people make inflammatory statements to incite huffy puffy responses…
You self involved, self righteous twaddle! IF the shoe fits make your own bed with it up a river! So there.
Mar 2, 2010 at 12:31 pm rating: 0
#48
Rachel
Oh, if ONLY I could post one of these at work (food court in a mall) and get away with it! And while “don’t be a douchebag and get off your cell phone” would be at the top of the page, I would make a list of other important items as follows:
- DON’T point at the food you want. Display case glass is mirrored and I have no idea what the fuck you’re pointing at. There are signs. Read them.
- DON’T shove your money in my face before I’ve even told you your total, and certainly DON’T lean across the counter to do so. I DON’T need your face a foot from mine (and you really need to brush your teeth).
- DON’T ask me what I recommend. I find this really, really annoying for some reason. Pick your own damn food!
- DON’T ask me to break your change. It’s against store policy, and I’m not going to bend the rules for you no matter how loud you yell at me (fancy that!). Need a $5 for those stupid kiddie carts your screaming child is demanding? Maybe it’s time to stop spoiling them and bring your own damn carrier into the mall, you lazy assfuck.
- DON’T hand me crumpled money. This annoys me more than anything! Take the time to unfold your money, and ESPECIALLY don’t hand me a handful of crumpled money and then go, “Sorry,” with an ashamed grin. Take the time and fucking do it yourself or go buy a fucking wallet!
If there’s a line (or any of the time, but when there’s a line especially):
- DON’T wait until you get to the register to pull out your cash. The prices are there on a big board in front of you. You know how to add (although that might be assuming too much). Get out what you think you’re going to need before you get to me so I don’t have to wait for you to dig through your pockets to find all your loose bills.
- DON’T make exact change; I have change, and I will gladly break your $20 for a $3.87 total just so that you don’t stand there digging through your purse/pockets/friend’s pockets just so you can give me exact change.
- DON’T get to the front of line and THEN realize you don’t know what you want. Neither I, nor the people in line behind you, appreciate it when you spend five minutes choosing, changing your mind, getting to the register and realizing you don’t have enough money, and then walking off without a word. (Yep, it’s happened before.)
And finally, DON’T be a group of teenagers. There is nothing I hate more than a group of loud, obnoxious teenagers who think they’re entitled to anything they want. (Nope, I’m not going to make you something special just because you asked in a loud voice, and you think three pennies is a good tip.)
Being polite will get you a long way, and I’m not afraid enough of losing my job that I won’t tell you if you’re being rude. Feel free to complain to my boss; he’s there enough to know that I work damn hard at what I do for not enough money, and he’ll back me up in a heart beat.
Whew! All right, time for me to go to work.
Mar 2, 2010 at 3:05 pm rating: 2
#49
Gandu
God help the first person who refuses to take my order if I have my cell phone near by.
I actrually will take mine out (I rarely use mine at ALL BTW) and pretend to be on the phone with someone when I see these kind of “California Asshole” type signs.
When confronted I ask two questions
1) Did you pay for my phone?
2) Do you pay my bill?
Oh no? Well then don’t go telling me what to do with my personal property, mind your business and KNOW YOUR PLACE.
I understand cell phones are “annoying” to some, but its just as annoying when I have some min wage counter jockey telling me what to do.
Besides, I see NO REASON why it could hinder or impede the ordering process, unless you are a whiny baby.
Mar 4, 2010 at 11:21 am rating: 3
#50
DireStr8s
mmmm…I just need you to scream KNOW YOUR PLACE one more time baby
Mar 4, 2010 at 3:01 pm rating: 1
#51
Jesse and the Rippers
I have to be honest, I don’t take too kindly to the “get off your phone or we will not take your order” way of doing business. While I certainly agree that it is the height of rudeness to gab on the phone while conducting business with another human being, I find it counterproductive to threaten not to serve me because of it.
I doubt the veracity of such threats. I think there are actually no consequences if I continue to talk on my phone, especially in this economy. If my local Starbucks were to refuse to serve all the folks that are talking on the phone as they stand in line, they’d probably lose 30% of their sales. And they’d probably lose them for good, as most people would likely not return to an establishment that ejected them for a relatively minor offense. It just seems to me that it punishes the store more than the patron, who can simply go across the street to the other Starbucks and be served.
That’s not to say that the rude customers who cannot deign to cease a phone call long enough to show another human being some respect do not deserve to be called out in some way. I recall in my youth being told that if I peed in the pool, a red circle would form around me, alerting one and all to my transgression. What we need is a retail equivalent. Some sort of public embarrassment that does not result in the establishment losing money, but is a deterrent to rude behavior.
Of course, this would make the PAN obsolete in the retail world, so this probably isn’t the place to discuss it.
Mar 8, 2010 at 6:56 pm rating: 1
#52
von der Neeth
Team Pathmark pharmacy!
It’s almost a Haiku-ey kind of thing. Just… BEAUTIFUL.
Mar 14, 2010 at 8:39 pm rating: 0
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