Entries from February 2010
“When I first moved to Chicago,” says Mike, “my grandfather told me about parking in the winter. One would dig out a spot and insert a chair, reserving the spot for your trouble.” One of his neighbors, it seems, didn’t get the benefit of such grandfatherly wisdom.
Neither, apparently, did Chris…who made the mistake of parking in an empty space outside his friend’s house in Chicago for few hours. When he got home, he found this note affixed to his mirror with glue.
And of course, Chicago isn’t the only city that takes its snow-shoveling etiquette seriously.
Just ask Anna in New Jersey…
Or Brooke in Indianapolis…
Or Amy in Washington, D.C…
Or Larry in Silver Spring, Maryland…
Or Kristin in Pittsburgh…
Olivia in Albany…
Or Chris in Boston…where they’re always keepin’ it classy.
related: Boston, a place for friends
Tags: Chicago · etiquette · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · parking · snow
“I don’t even like cats,” our submitter in San Francisco admits, “but reading the note made me want to go inside to see what someone would be so inclined to steal.”
related: Do not kiss on someone else’s kiss
Tags: cats · exclamation-point happy!!!! · irregular capitalization · San Francisco · stealing
Aleister in London found this critique slipped under his door after an impromptu Thursday night sing-along. “I am a big fan of my neighbours’ critical opinion,” Alastair says. “I won’t offer much defense other than that our music selection was exceptional and I was on my way to work when I found it.”
Well done, Flat 3. Dry wit, a soft touch, and lovely handwriting? This is one note that definitely deserves a place of honor on the fridge.
If you absolutely must write a note, I’d say this is how to do it.
related: It was an ironic dance party, okay?
Tags: actually totally reasonable · London · neighbors · noise
“Some serious shit must have gone down with the previous office toaster,” says our anonymous submitter from Canada. (Maybe it was left without wearing any socks or shoes?)
Meanwhile, Marilyn in Pittsburgh says that her office lunchroom has inexplicably gone through nearly half a dozen toasters over the past year. “It’s unclear as to what keeps happening to them, but nonetheless, we keep having to replace them.” Within a few days of the latest model’s appearance, it seems that tensions are already running dangerously hot.
Please, won’t somebody think of the toast?!
related: Especially Deborah
extra credit: Sad toast [etsy.com]
Tags: CAPS LOCK · kitchen · office · toaster
Alex and his wife, Kathy, have an 18-month-old son who, among other his hobbies, enjoys pulling off his socks and shoes at any opportunity. (Perhaps he’s a future marathon-running superathlete. Or, you know, a normal 18-month-old.)
Recently, Kathy took her son with her on a trip to the store in their hometown of Las Vegas (temperature: a bone-chilling 64 degrees). When she came back to the car, she found this helpful bit of parenting advice waiting on her windshield.
related: Oh, the Rancher and the McMansioner should be friends
Tags: "helpful" advice · exclamation-point happy!!!! · kids · Moms & Dads · shoes · unsolicited feedback
As a Valentine’s Day gift to you all, I present you with this epic love story (which Teddie in Minneapolis discovered pinned to the bulletin board in his apartment building).
Teddie’s love note to this love note: “I love that this person (he? she?) used commas, ellipses, and possibly a semicolon, but no periods. I also love how the all-caps rant in the middle segues into a plea to be Myspace friends again with an offhand ‘anyway.’ Also, what happened to her dad?”
Oh, Charles. You are so SUPER ATTRACTIVE I can hardly help myself. Deseray doesn’t know what’s she missing!
related: perfect for each other
Tags: ex drama · Minneapolis/St. Paul · p.s. · runaway run-on sentences · spelling and grammar police · spurned lover · TL;DR · WTF? · xoxo · You call that punctuation?
Not all messages from the beyond come in the form of, say, a Jesus-shaped Cheeto.
“Usually Oprah and her magazine are empowering and inspiring,” says Bek in Cape Coral, Florida — but then she opened her latest issue of O and found this “Live Your Best Life weekend” sweepstakes entry code. “Now I know the truth. They should just mail the magazine in a brown paper bag so I could wear it over my head. *sniff*”
Meanwhile, Matt in Tulsa, Oklahoma was trying to submit a note right here at Passiveaggressivenotes.com. “Then the Captcha widget pulled out its Ouija board and cast its voodoo on my employment situation,” he says. “I almost cried.”
And then, of course, there’s always the bizarrely ominous fortune cookie…
related: Quoth the Buzzard: WTF?
Erin in Arlington, Virginia says this sign appeared in every elevator in her building during the D.C. area’s Snowmaggedon of 2010. “Apparently cabin fever requires drinks…and only people in their 20s and early 30s.”
related: no girls allowed
Tags: neighbors · Northern Virginia · old folks
You know how it’s usually way easier to write off someone off as an annoying asshole than it is to feel sorry for them? But then something happens — like this whiteboard note — and suddenly, you feel like the asshole…but you still resent the person for making you feel that way. And now it’s just awkward all around, because that person doesn’t want pity from an asshole like you, anyway. Sigh.
This note makes me sad, so I will choose to deal with these uncomfortable feelings by blaming the parents, even though I know that isn’t fair either. Now I feel sorry for the parents, too. Okay, I’m going to look at more pictures from the Puppy Bowl now.
related: Your one and only Wife #1
Tags: bad sales pitch · college life · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · whiteboard
“My wife and I have been busy lately,” writes Sean in Vancouver, “and we forgot to get the newly-lost baby tooth from under my daughter’s pillow. We finally remembered a few days later. When my wife went in to slip some money under the pillow, I could hear her trying hard not to crack up.” When she came out (red-faced and laughing), to show me the note, I understood why.”
related: Passive-Aggressive Easter Bunny
Tags: kids · most popular notes of 2010 · p.s. · signed with love · Vancouver