Entries from March 2010
Angie in Columbus, Ohio says this is the second (hilariously) furious fridge note to be posted lately in the office kitchenette. Adds Angie: “Who knew a Jimmy Dean breakfast sandwich fit into a ‘special diet’?” Perhaps next time the writer could just hop (er, drive) on over to Taco Bell?
related: It’s not funny, it’s my sandwich
extra credit: This is why you’re fat.
Tags: bullet points · Columbus · food · obnoxious definition · office fridge · stealing · thanks (but not really) · that's disrespectful
Emily in Richmond, Virginia says this note was recently posted in her apartment building, “right next to a note complaining about a) the tenants in the building that have parties and don’t clean up the beer that gets left in the hallways and b) the laziness of the dog owners in the building that don’t pick up their dogs’ poop.”
related: Wanna touch the baby?
Tags: exclamation-point happy!!!! · fuck fuckity fuck fuck · kids · more aggressive than passive · most popular notes of 2010 · neighbors · noise · Richmond · spelling and grammar police
Grandmothers live for thank you notes — receiving them, writing them, not-so-subtly inquiring whether one might be forthcoming.
Jennifer in Michigan received this gracious note of thanks after a Christmas visit to her Grandma. Cue the violins, please…
(If you can’t read Grandma cursive, just mouse over the note for a transcription.)
related: Really, Mom, you shouldn’t have
Tags: Christmas · family · Grandma · guilt trip · Michigan · thanks (but not really)
Facebook: always there to remind you of all the fun you’re not having.
related: Socializing (you’re doing it wrong)
Tags: Facebook · frenemies · preggers · weddings and bridezillas
Alexandra and her best friend David were thrift-store shopping in Memphis, Tennessee when they spotted this sign (in the restroom, this time…not the fitting room).
What I love about this one is that, unlike most of its kind, this notice doesn’t issue any kind of directive (e.g. “Hey nitwits, don’t flush the merchandise!!!”), nor does it directly address the salient issue at hand (Does the toilet actually work now, or not?). Because, really, a simple “Out of Order” sign would have sufficed, if the latter were the case. Instead, it’s just like, “This one time, at band camp…”
In place of “Thank You,” I think it should say “The End.” Or maybe: “Who the hell wipes with a child’s T-shirt?!”
related: What is it about thrift store dressing rooms?
Tags: all clogged up · retail hell · spelling and grammar police · Tennessee · TMI · toilet
“I have no traces of child paraphernalia in my Mini Cooper,” says our submitter from Alexandria, Virginia — and she didn’t buy her car for environmental reasons. (“I bought it because I’m a Mini fan,” she says, “regardless of the global impact.”) So, as you might imagine, she was more than a bit puzzled to find this note under her wiper blade.
related: Herbie Goes to Washington
Tags: car · Northern Virginia · pure poetry · The Earth · unsolicited feedback · WTF?
Writes Sarah: “This note was written to me after I told my seven-year-old daughter to go to her room until she felt like being nice. I’m still trying to figure out what she really feels. Was it love mingled with regret…or slathering me with goodness in hopes of ending the misery in her room? Somehow I still think she meant what she originally said. Motherhood rocks!!!!”
Meanwhile, Laura in California writes: ”My six-year-old daughter misbehaved at school, so she couldn’t go to the harvest festival. This didn’t go over well, so she wrote me this threatening note. When I laughed, she took it back to add ‘I (am) serious.’”
And it’s not just the girls. Liev in Gainesville, Georgia received this from her six-year-old son when — while trying to get dinner on the table for five kids clamoring for her attention — she had to tell him she did not have time to look at his latest Lego creation right this second. “This is his drawing of me yelling at him. The thing above him is his broken heart.”
related: Mad, but not made enough to forego a French braid
Tags: art · heart · kids · Moms & Dads · most popular notes of 2010 · not-so-veiled threats · signed with love · spelling and grammar police
“This was posted after the author cleaned the house which consisted entirely of her own mess,” says our anonymous submitter in the U.K.
Of course, when you live with multiple roommates, it’s always somebody else’s mess. (Or should I say…I’ts?)
related: May the sanctity of the sink prevail!
Tags: cleaning · dishes · martyr complex · signed with love · spelling and grammar police · TL;DR · You call that punctuation?