Who needs a “Powertrain warranty”? According to this Connecticut notewriter, if you buy a Ford, you get a lifetime worth of diplomat-worthy parking privileges!
Confession: I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 27. I am a terrible parker. (I am slow, but I try.) If only I had bought a Ford!
related: The Mini Cooper owner’s dilemma — “Save the earth, kill the kids?!”
extra credit: “Chevy” [urbandictionary.com]
66 responses so far ↓
#1
Kathryn C
omg the guy at the dealership totally forgot to tell me about this perk!
*goes off to take up two parking spaces with a Ford F-150*
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:37 pm rating: 14
#2
littlekat
LOL, we were just talking about leaving a note that said, “did you have to park this way or are you just a selfish bastard?” on a car in front of our building.
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:40 pm rating: 3
#3
QuarterRoy00
How dare this person declare Chevy’s suck!
Chevy Chase was a genius!
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:40 pm rating: 7
#4
Just Peachy
I have to say I give mad props to this notewriter. I am so sick of dumb asses not being able to park right. How the fuck did you get a drivers license if you can’t park between two straight lines?
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:41 pm rating: 16
#5
Escape Goat
Where’s the “Dear …”? I give it an 8.9 in PA
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:45 pm rating: 7
#6
Joe Blow
I once drove into a parking lot at the ice rink that was very filled and a guy had parked his town car such that he was nearly occupying three spaces on a weird diagonal. Funny thing was, the lot was full, so I eventually wedged myself in one of his spots. Then I got out and realized that the dude was in the car. I thought he might come after me (any douche who parks like that seems likely to have anger management issues too). Maybe the hockey sticks I was carrying scared him off.
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:49 pm rating: 13
#7
The Girl With Kaleidescope Eyes
My office seems to have an inordinate number of these douche-canoes, and not one of them drives a domestic car.
Apr 6, 2010 at 4:56 pm rating: 3
#8
MAMARILLA2
Smiley face FTW.
Apr 6, 2010 at 5:16 pm rating: 4
#9
Mills
Yes, the smiley face at the end makes it sooooo enjoyable to put down by a person with the penmanship of a fifth grader.
Apr 6, 2010 at 5:25 pm rating: 4
#10
Citrico
At a local high school there was a kid who would angle park over 3 spots to show off his sweet ride. Unfortunately, he did that at graduation, which I had to go to, and featured an overflowing lot. I eventually squeezed my Ford between a School bus and a wall, barely having enough room to get out, because douchewagon had to show off his rockin’ Acura.
If only I had known Fords can park however they want! I would have rigged up a ramp and parked on top of the Acura, and when he complained I’d say “Aha, I’ve got a Ford, I can park where I want!”
Apr 6, 2010 at 5:33 pm rating: 8
#11
Lauri
The only thing that keeps me from leaving notes is the knowledge that sometimes the person could be the victim of the “trickle down bad parking” where there’s already a car parked over the line that forces you to park over the next line. The first car leaves and from then on, you’re the selfish jerk.
Apr 6, 2010 at 6:13 pm rating: 39
#12
Canthz_B
I don’t know why, but I always take it personally when I see those four or five cars parked on an angle in two spaces at the back of the mall parking lot.
It’s as if they’re saying I can’t be trusted to open my car door without dinging their precious rides.
I also feel a lot better after a quick keying.
Apr 6, 2010 at 7:34 pm rating: 38
#13
Pterosaur
If I’m unworthy of a parking space, I’ll just park my Malibu on your lawn.
Thanks
Apr 6, 2010 at 8:26 pm rating: 5
#14
ArfArf
People who dot their “i”‘s with little circles should not be allowed to compose freehand. Ever. I also get the feeling that, not too many years previous to this note-writing, the little circles used to be hearts. And really, what chick vehemently hates Chevy’s unless brainwashed by her father, husband, or boyfriend?
Apr 6, 2010 at 8:49 pm rating: 11
#15
Sally
I think I would cry if someone wrote me this.
And I hate her handwriting.
Apr 6, 2010 at 9:45 pm rating: 3
#16
Critical Grass
Look, there’s a system to it: If you drive a Ford, you can take up 2 parking spaces. But if you drive a car from another brand, you can only park in 1/2 of a parking space, so the good people who drive Fords can park properly. =)
Apr 6, 2010 at 9:52 pm rating: 4
#17
Canthz_B
Ford vs. Chevy? Really? That’s like buying tickets to a world championship heavyweight boxing match, but you can really only stay for the under-card.
Apr 7, 2010 at 1:27 am rating: 2
#18
Canthz_B
In these tough economic times, this note reminds us that even rich people fight over parking spaces!
Get a grip, guys (Mr. Chevy and Mr. Ford). You may as well be debating whether plantar warts beat bunions.
Apr 7, 2010 at 1:33 am rating: 3
#19
Stuart Scrace
This post has more tags than the note has words in it, that seems a little excessive, lollercakes
Apr 7, 2010 at 2:34 am rating: 0
#20
sucktackular
right, since chevys are so much better than fords. oh wait, they’re both american piece of shit cars. good note, though.
Apr 7, 2010 at 6:33 am rating: 3
#21
jaywalke
I like to move the lines so it looks like other people can’t park.
It takes work, but it’s well worth the trouble.
Apr 7, 2010 at 8:09 am rating: 10
#22
flying gargoyle
It is the happy face signature that really makes it ever so truly and dearly passive-aggressive. I’m gonna trade in my car for one of those new sentient Fords. Ad line: “The car that wonders what it needs *you* for!”
Apr 7, 2010 at 8:47 am rating: 3
#23
rave
this note just cemented my theory that people who dot their i’s with open circles rather than dots are one (or both) of the following: a girl in junior high school, or fucking psychotic.
just saying.
Apr 7, 2010 at 11:51 am rating: 8
#24
Odious
This time it’s the webmaster who goes on grammar alert!
A lifetime of diplomat-worthy
OR
A lifetime’s worth of diplomat-worthy
NOT
A lifetime worth of diplomat-worthy
ex. A year’s worth of food
It’s called a “temporal expression apostrophe”
Apr 7, 2010 at 4:17 pm rating: 2
#25
Youji
I’ve got a ’99 Cavalier that’s got 145k miles on it and still gets over 30mpg on the highway. I’ve taken it from southern Michigan to Baltimore and back four times = D
I love this little car.
Apr 8, 2010 at 12:34 am rating: 0
#26
Cady
I get all my cars from ze Germans.
Apr 8, 2010 at 10:09 am rating: 0
#27
McMoFo
On second thought, I’d rather have a Waldorf salad.
Apr 8, 2010 at 12:03 pm rating: 1
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