When Sarah saw this notice posted in the restroom of a Chicago movie theater, she says, “I was thrilled to find a company willing to admit what I have always secretly felt: that despite their tree-saving abilities, electric hand dryers suck.”
Scott was also thrilled to spot this sign in the men’s room of a bar in Council Bluffs, Iowa. “It’s mainly the incredibly bad spelling and punctuation that I love about it,” he says. (The less-than-incredible attempt to drum up excitement for those “fast and new hand blowers”? Not so much.)
![Sorry, but we will not be useing [sic] paper towels From now on. There is Fast + New HAND BLOWER'S [sic] Thank you](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2619/3962422699_4851e07658.jpg)
related: And a very happy Earth Day to you!
extra credit: Air Hand Dryers May Leave Bacteria on Hands, Says Study [greendaily.com]
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158 responses so far ↓
#1
Canthz_B
Yes, because generation of electricity is so very environmentally friendly, we don’t need to kill trees anymore.
Apr 22, 2010 at 12:26 am rating: 21
#2
Denny DelVecchio
And what of the door handle?
Isn’t that why paper towels are put in bathrooms?
Apr 22, 2010 at 12:45 am rating: 16
#3
Canthz_B
Team electric hand dryers!
Paper doesn’t grow on trees you know!!!!
Apr 22, 2010 at 1:01 am rating: 19
#4
park rose
Team bring your own small flannel/towel to wipe your hands with (and, well, you know, if there happens to be no tp . . .).
Apr 22, 2010 at 1:30 am rating: 4
#5
infant tyrone
From a conspiracy theorist/analyst perspective, I’m wondering if the increase in use of electric hand dryers is based on a forecasted need (forecasted by Someone, Somewhere) for more burning-at-the-stake fuel, more pitch for those torches held by fearful/violent villagers, and more tar for the ever-popular tar and feathering.
If Tyson Foods announces a breakthrough on its flagship product (I’d call it their cash cow, but, well…), that’ll pretty much nail it in my book.
Apr 22, 2010 at 1:42 am rating: 5
#6
Yuval
Well, technically, hand dryers blow (rather than suck).
Apr 22, 2010 at 2:07 am rating: 22
#7
Pennyjg
We have the new, very powerful, Dyson hand driers at work and they ROCK! Takes seconds to dry completely and you can watch the skin on your hands swirling around in interesting ways you’d never seen before too.
Apr 22, 2010 at 2:08 am rating: 32
#8
Dani
I *like* hand driers– so often the only water that comes out of those sinks is barely above freezing, and the hand drier is usually warm air.
Apr 22, 2010 at 2:43 am rating: 6
#9
Sarah
Did you know that in an entire public bathroom, the place where a bacterium feels most happy (and most prone to reproduce) is inside the warm electric handdrier that is only cleaned on the outside?
I work in a hospital and all bathroom here provide paper towels because when you dry hands with an electric dryer, you might just as well not wash your hands at all.
Apr 22, 2010 at 4:31 am rating: 10
#10
molly ringwald
So, let me get this straight…
There is fast
+
New Handblower’s
=
Thank you
?
Apr 22, 2010 at 5:45 am rating: 16
#11
Mel K
What do you call Engrish when English is the first language?
They both could’ve used an exclamation mark!
Apr 22, 2010 at 6:13 am rating: 2
#12
Yang-May Ooi
Well, the good thing about electric dryers is that they can keep you warm if you are trapped in a public toilet by mistake over Xmas – see http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1248810/Jogger-spent-Christmas-Day-locked-public-toilet-gets-compensation-payout.html
Apr 22, 2010 at 7:07 am rating: 0
#13
jaywalke
Does hand blowing count as third base?
Apr 22, 2010 at 7:34 am rating: 19
#14
Sam S
I like my hand blowers like I prefer my girls – fast + new
Apr 22, 2010 at 7:54 am rating: 4
#15
Canthz_B
I’m so much more confident in an election process for the Presidency which starts with the wonderfully well- educated people of Iowa now.
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:11 am rating: 6
#16
claw71
This presents several problems. First, I can’t open the door with the blower. I’ve tried and it doesn’t work. I suppose I could use toilet paper to protect me from all of those germs on the handle but toilet paper tends to be infested with choloform bacteria. It’s OK to wipe with but toilet paper is disgusting otherwise.
The second issue I have is that I like to use paper towels as a post-defecation buffer. I prefer wadding up and paper towel for this purpose because it’s less likely to fall apart while deployed between my cheeks. Toilet paper pills up and gets tangled in my ass hairs leaving me with an unsightly crop of dingle berries.
The third problem I have with those hand dyers is the fact that they don’t ever fucking work.
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:21 am rating: 8
#17
Gavin
Thumb drought today me thinks
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:21 am rating: 1
#18
Jennifer
Hand dryers are unsanitary. Even if you wash your hands, the friction caused by rubbing them with a paper towel gets rid of 70% of the germs. Hand dryers, since they create a nice warm, moist environment (’cause really, who’s ever gotten their hands COMPLETELY bone dry?) actually create a breeding ground for the nice, antibiotic-resistant bacteria we’re creating with antibiotic hand soap. And unless you wash your little terrycloth that you carry around with you after every time you use it, you’re just putting the germs back on your hands (though it is better than hand dryers). Really, the best choice when faced with a hand dryer is to carry around hand sanitizer (alcohol-based, AT LEAST 60% or it won’t do shit — 70% is best, and check that there aren’t any antibiotics added, just the alcohol), and use the terrycloth to open the door (make sure the side you touch never grabs the door for you, so they should be two different colours).
– a nurse
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:31 am rating: 3
#19
Canthz_B
Hand dryers and paper towels come and go, but I can always rely on a good pair of pants.
In fact, my new terry cloth line will be out this Fall!
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:31 am rating: 9
#20
sleeps
OMG, that’s crazy. Fast + New Hand Blower was my nickname in college!
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:34 am rating: 18
#21
Splint Chesthair
So none of you people have ever figured out how to open a door with your foot?
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:40 am rating: 2
#22
Hmmm
I like electric hand dryers.
Some of them suck (metaphorically), yes, but in general I prefer them.
They don’t have to take a long time. There are fast alternatives:
http://www.mitsubishijettowel.com/
http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/07_27/b4041063.htm
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:45 am rating: 2
#23
laurie
Hand dryers suck. Not only on their own, but also because they implicate that the toilets will be automatic.
And if there’s anything worse than hand dryers, it’s automatic flushing toilets.
Apr 22, 2010 at 8:48 am rating: 6
#24
Splint Chesthair
All this talk about germs. How about all you knuckledraggers keep your paws out of your holes and then you won’t have to worry about the germs. Germs on your hands won’t make you sick.
Apr 22, 2010 at 9:11 am rating: 1
#25
Not That Nicole the Other Nicole
Why is there such a debate about opening the door? I’m with claw71 here, why are we sheltering our poor immune systems to the point of reducing them to meaninglessness? Let those white blood cells bare the knuckles for a bit, it’s a huge benefit.
When I was a kid (oh god, here it goes), my mom let me make mud pies and open bathroom doors (yes, I washed my hands; no, I did not dry them properly, I was a kid) and take out the garbage, and I can clearly observe that I get sick less often than the people my age who were lectured on how important it was to WASH YOUR DAMN HANDS every time you do anything and don’t put that in your mouth, you don’t know where it’s been, and Timmy stop grabbing the toys in the doctor’s office, they’re covered in filth.
I’m also a hell of a lot healthier than the people at work who fall back on hand sanitizer three times a day. I think that habit is just an extension of this overblown childhood fear of the Horrible Awful No Good Very Bad Germ. We have to self-vaccinate to some degree.
I quote an ex of mine: in the unlikely event that I ever have children, I will not make them use hand sanitizer, and I will in fact toss them bodily into the stuffed animal bins at the Goodwill and let them go swimming.
Get over the terror, people. This has fecal mist propaganda written all over it. Rather than being paranoid, let’s just be sensible–wash your hands when you poop. Don’t think too hard about it, you’ll exterminate the human race with your damn alcohol wipes.
/hyperventilate
Apr 22, 2010 at 9:42 am rating: 22
#26
Mark
Some people might be interested in what the venerable Cecil Adams (“The Straight Dope”) had to say about this issue, in his article “What’s better for the environment, electric hand dryers or paper towels?”.
See this.
(weird – the link didn’t work the first time I posted it, sorry ’bout that)
Apr 22, 2010 at 10:09 am rating: 6
#27
Zarggg
Whose blowing is the … hand? This grammar makes my brains hurt.
Apr 22, 2010 at 11:36 am rating: 3
#28
Edwina the Defrocked Nun
Dyson Airblade – the only electric hand dryer that doesn’t lose suction.
>o<
Apr 22, 2010 at 11:52 am rating: 3
#29
noah
Hand Blower’s Thank you? How will Mr. Blower’s thank you help me dry my hands?
Apr 22, 2010 at 2:27 pm rating: 3
#30
Sam S
RE: String #24
I just learned that it wasn’t volcanic ash that grounded all those European flights…
IT WAS FECAL MIST
I am not joking! Run for your lives!!!
Apr 22, 2010 at 2:45 pm rating: 4
#31
TippingCows
I am always amazed that people will pay money for signs that are not punctuated correctly.
In any case, I say gimme all the germs you’ve got and keep that damn flu shot away from me. I get sick once a year – if that – and I’m not messing with my white blood cells of steel.
I want to wash my hands in the dirtiest mud you’ve got and dry them on the unwashed underwear of 2 year-olds!
Apr 22, 2010 at 3:05 pm rating: 2
#32
Stefania
Since when is an electric device eco-friendly? Ok, maybe it’s better to use a hand-dryer than a paper towel, but electricity is made in thermocentrals/nuclear centrals that pollute a lot. So, in the long run, I think it’s the same thing.
If you want to be eco-friendly, just let your hands dry by themselves, or wipe them on your pants.
Apr 22, 2010 at 4:44 pm rating: 2
#33
Fanboy Wife
I remember reading a study that discussed whether paper towels or hand dryers were better for the environment. The verdict was to dry your hands on your pants.
Apr 22, 2010 at 5:53 pm rating: 2
#34
Creme Brulee
And what of the noise pollution? Those Dyson dryers are so damn loud I fear for my ears.
Apr 22, 2010 at 6:02 pm rating: 2
#35
Uhmmm
Am I the only one here that knows air drying your hands gets MORE germs on you than simple towel drying? Why can’t they get towels and just re-use them? It takes far less energy to wash a load of hand towels and it is far less dangerous.
Apr 23, 2010 at 1:06 am rating: 0
#36
Splint Chesthair
I have a dog, I just wipe my hands on him.
Apr 23, 2010 at 6:39 am rating: 3
#37
ur doing it rong
I have a Handler thingy, it’s called my sleeve
Apr 23, 2010 at 9:50 am rating: 1
#38
emeff
They have the same sign (the first one) in the E Street theater in Washington, D.C . I think it’s just because they get a bajillion complaints from customers who want paper towels.
Apr 29, 2010 at 7:20 pm rating: 0
#39
JamiSings
Odd, seeing how electric hand dryers are worse for the environment then paper towels. Because the electricity production is so much dirtier.
Long term, people, long term paper towels are better.
May 23, 2010 at 8:40 pm rating: 0
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