From the Department of Inappropriate Clip Art

May 28th, 2010 · 36 comments

Just in time for WTF? Friday…

Exhibit a) Posted on the front door of Ruth‘s apartment complex just outside Washington, D.C.

On Thursday, May 27, 2010 the Sheriff's Office is scheduled for evictions within our Community [on a classic Word template with trumpets and confetti]

Exhibit b) From a parole liaison at the New Jersey Department of Corrections:

Parole Dates/Max Releases

Exhibit c) From a vacation rental home in Maine, as spotted by Mike from Philadelphia, who adds, “I’m allergic to type set in Comic Sans.”

Our septic system is very allergic to sanitary products of all types. Please do not flush diapers, sanitary pads or tampons and the like. Thank you.....

related: Screenbeans are never okay

FILED UNDER: clip art catastrophe · Comic Sans Alert · D.C. · Maine · New Jersey · WTF?


36 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Anony Nonny Ney

    Are those dance steps on Exhibit B?

    The inmate shuffle…

    May 28, 2010 at 12:45 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Canthz_B bang

      Who knew Arthur Murray did time for skipping bail?

      May 28, 2010 at 1:04 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Wolverine Girl

      The Jailhouse Rock

      May 30, 2010 at 2:45 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Silence

    I can only imagine the kind of blind, seething, flushed-diaper-filled-with-green-slime rage which drove the author of #3 to use Screenbeans AND Comic Sans.

    Homeboy is PISSED.

    May 28, 2010 at 12:56 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   AuntyBron

      RE: #3 – Allergic? So flush a box of Allegra. Problem solved.

      May 28, 2010 at 11:03 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Canthz_B bang

    Clicking heels over parole? I’d have used a happy dog on a stiff leash!

    May 28, 2010 at 1:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Canthz_B bang

    Diapers, sanitary pads, tampons and the like are apparently “Da Bomb”!!

    May 28, 2010 at 1:33 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   brandine bang

    Somehow puts me in mind of this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wI7CIWJ5PJc

    May 28, 2010 at 6:30 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Ruth

    In the interest of saying it before someone else does, I guess technically I don’t live “in” DC. Were that paper not up on the door, however, I could see across the street into DC. I live one block over the border and in a state, hence having a Sheriff’s dept. I don’t know if DC does. :)

    May 28, 2010 at 6:34 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Stinky bang

    Yay evictions!!!!

    May 28, 2010 at 6:52 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   HandyMarigolds

      Yeah! Nothing says “newly homeless” like celebratory trumpets and confetti.

      I call “bitter leasing office totally did it on purpose.”

      May 28, 2010 at 10:27 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   zenvelo

    I’m glad the apartment owners scheduled the evictions before the long weekend, so everyone has plenty of time to find a place on the streets before the government workers come back on Tuesday!

    May 28, 2010 at 6:58 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Liz

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTjTXOtff8A

    May 28, 2010 at 7:18 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   jellyfishheart

    Comic Sans make Hulk ANGRY! Make Hulk want to SMASH! (or at minimum, put a lit cannonball down the toilet.)

    Incidentally, do you think the cartoon figure is confused that the cannonball is supposed to represent an allergy to feminine hygiene products?

    May 28, 2010 at 7:36 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   Mo® bang

      I think possibly the cartoon person is trying to figure out how that Acme© bomb tampon is going to fit in her hooha.

      May 28, 2010 at 8:58 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   TheOldSchool bang

      The thought of nail bombs makes me mad, but that someone would be sick enough to construct a bloody tampon bomb is something that really ticks me off.

      May 28, 2010 at 4:20 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Mo® bang

      I was going to go with, “your ticked off, you can’t imagine how they feel!” but instead I am going to opt for the bland,
      “Obviously it is a time bomb then.” :razz:

      It isn’t exactly the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

      May 28, 2010 at 4:38 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   Woman on the Verge bang

      Boys… You might want to step away from the tampons.

      May 28, 2010 at 6:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   park rose

      . . . before somebody loses the thread . . .

      Jun 1, 2010 at 3:55 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Edwina the Defrocked Nun

    Apparently bombs are okay with the septic system – as long as they are not sanitary.

    What do you people have against Comic Sans? It’s no better or worse than other fonts. Granted, Comic Sans makes it hard to take a message seriously, so it’s sort of like shuffling your feet and saying “Not that anyone wants to hear what I have to say, but ….”

    Oh never mind, I guess I just answered my own question. Comic Sans is the perfect passive-aggressive font.

    May 28, 2010 at 8:27 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   HandyMarigolds

      My bugaboo with Comic Sans is the same one I have with Kristin ITC, Curlz MT, and the like. I work with college-educated grown-ups who go out of their way to make their messages look like they were written in crayon by kindergarteners.

      I assume they want me to read their work and go, “Wow, what whimsical, fun-loving, creative people!” But they never actually write anything whimsical or funny or creative.

      May 28, 2010 at 10:32 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   bibberly

      Amen, HandyMarigolds. I absolutely hate getting official e-mails at work in cutesy little fonts like Comic Sans, etc., especially when it’s in hot pink. If it’s not an invitation to a child’s birthday party, don’t make it look like one.

      May 29, 2010 at 11:45 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   Having Fitz

    Okay, in hindsight a stick of dynamite was NOT the best tampon substitute, but it’s the right shape and does have a string…. What? Like Aunt Flo hasn’t ever caught YOU by surprise…

    May 28, 2010 at 8:38 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Canthz_B bang

    I’ve gotta be honest, my eviction parties beat the fuck out of my Superbowl parties.

    We always know the winner in advance, so we can concentrate on getting drunk!

    May 28, 2010 at 8:39 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Ruth

      Well…we get notices about those parties too! ;) (ok, just Superbowl, Graduation, Halloween) Funny enough the “Don’t party too loud” notices never have this awesome border! Pity.

      May 28, 2010 at 2:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   veritybrown

    I actually kind of like these examples–they show a wicked and warped sense of humor.

    May 28, 2010 at 10:51 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Melissa B

    Eviction party!

    May 28, 2010 at 7:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   TippingCows

    You know what you do at an eviction party, right?

    You run laps around the property that is soon-to-be-empty, clicking your heels every few steps or so.

    Then, you throw blood-stained bombs onto the roof of the property.

    If the property is a ground-floor apartment, you have even more fun!

    A finger-licking good time to be had by all.

    May 28, 2010 at 7:26 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Melissa B

      there better be pringles.

      May 28, 2010 at 7:39 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Walker, "Tex" (a stranger) bang

    Totally wasted opportunity: If I’d have designed that Parole Dates sign I would have used the Monopoly guy from the “Get out of jail free” card.

    May 28, 2010 at 9:20 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   bellybionic

    Now I’m dying to know what people are supposed to submit before the sheriff shows up for the evictions. Pleas for leniency? Death threats? Information about the neighbors?

    May 28, 2010 at 10:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Wolverine Girl

      Tampon bombs, perhaps.

      May 30, 2010 at 2:43 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   Xenobiologista

    Inappropriate? #2 and #3 are totally appropriate. =D

    May 29, 2010 at 4:02 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Lisa

    In the right hands, the sanitary pad is a beneficent tool for progress & good.

    … but in the wrong hands— as dangerous as a TICKING TIME BOMB!

    May 29, 2010 at 9:57 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Woman on the Verge bang

    I finally figured out the clipart. The screen bean is MacGyver trying to figure out how to defuse the bomb he accidentally made out of a used tampon, three sanitary napkins and some allergy medication.

    May 29, 2010 at 10:19 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Grimfool

    In the 3rd pic, the guy pissing on the bomb sure has a huge . . . er, fuse . . . doesn’t he?

    Jun 4, 2010 at 1:27 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     

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