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Warnings for the altruistic tourist

June 13th, 2010 · 84 comments

Juliet from Los Angeles came upon this sign near the summit of a 12-km hike up Turrialba Volcano, in Costa Rica. “As I stared down into giant crater of the active volcano, dotted with sulfur pools, I realized the sign was right. Swimming in those pools probably wasn’t worth the expense.”

The dryly practical approach seems to be a popular one at tourist locations around the world — especially zoos, such as this one on Langkawi Island:

Meanwhile, this resort in the Bahamas adds its own whimsical twist:

FILED UNDER: Americans abroad · animal welfare · Bahamas · Costa Rica · Espanol · Malaysia · most popular notes of 2010 · smoking · that's irresponsible · tourists

84 responses so far ↓

#1 Anne H

The last one – smokers dropping their cigarette butts on the ground – is a pet peeve of mine.

/rant
THE WORLD IS *NOT* YOUR ASHTRAY!!!
PUT YOUR NASTY TOXIC BUTTS IN THE RIGHT CONTAINER!!
/endrant

Jun 13, 2010 at 1:42 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #1.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  Which container do toxic asses go in?
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 2:07 pm rating: 90
- #1.2 infant tyrone
  
  Try the sheer yet elegant plastic bag your dry cleaner uses.
  They have special ones without all of that busy “Beware: Choking Hazard”.
  Just ask for the Branson model.
  Use it on the Middle Eastern toxic ass down the block and ditch the body.
  After he’s been Bransoned, folks’ll really miss Uri.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 2:26 pm rating: 90
- #1.3 Canthz_B
  
  I can understand being disgusted by second-hand smoke, but to get upset over a dead cigarette means something more like mental illness.
  
  So some asshole decides he doesn’t approve of smoking and removes the ashtrays…as if that will cause smokers to quit. Then complains about cigarette butts not being properly disposed of.
  I can certainly see the logic in that.
  
  I’d suggest that, if you’d like cigarette butts properly disposed of, you start a campaign to install more ashtrays in public outdoor spaces.
  Ashtrays are the result of smoking, not the cause of it, so removing them actually causes the problem of improperly disposed of butts.
  
  Personally, I’d quit…but I don’t want your taxes to go up.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:14 pm rating: 90
- #1.4 Serenity
  
  I must say, I smoke, and I hate it when ppl toss their cig butts on the ground. But, I also agree with CB…we used to have community ashtrays in our complex, new owner decided to take them out, and ban smoking to outside the gates only. Of course, everyone still smokes inside the gates, but now, they toss their butts on the ground…and our very sweet, non smoking manager, has to pick them up. Although, it’s not that valid of an excuse…I manage to pick up and discard of my cig butts, it’s not that hard, really…you just put it out, and toss it at the next available public trash can. The people who can’t be bothered to do that, are the same ones that toss out their fast food bags and cups on the side of the road.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 7:15 pm rating: 90
- #1.5 Anne H
  
  Many of you seem to have missed my saying that my dislike of piggy smokers who don’t use ash trays is a ‘pet peeve’.
  
  It is wrong for anyone to dispose of garbage in public spaces. Cigarettes are especially nasty because they are poisonous.
  
  Woodsey has a good point, it does seem to be more socially acceptable for smokers to fling their refuse wherever they please. If the same person dumped a loaded diaper on the sidewalk, we’d object. But a cigarette butt? Most people don’t even blink.
  
  Edit: Thanks, Serenity, that’s exactly my point.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 7:21 pm rating: 90
- #1.6 Canthz_B
  
  Just who is eating these poisonous cigarette butts?
  
  Surely we can pass a law against it.
  
  Of course we’d object to disposing of soiled diapers in a cavalier manner…we don’t like cholera epidemics.
  I could understand if you were upset about discarded lit cigarette butts because of wildfire dangers and such, we’re all against that, but being poisoned by cold butts?
  
  Surely you’ve seen candy wrappers, napkins, the list goes on, carelessly dropped countless times and not had as visceral a reaction to it.
  
  I get it. You don’t like smoking, but take a step back from the brink. The butts aren’t emitting noxious, toxic, lung-damaging fumes and are therefore nothing more than unsightly, as is other litter.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 7:44 pm rating: 90
- #1.7 infant tyrone
  
  And then we can hire more enforcement people…it’s a jobs thing now.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 8:18 pm rating: 90
- #1.8 Canthz_B
  
  City Ordinance number 018 (Oh! One Ate!)?
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 9:52 pm rating: 90
- #1.9 park rose
  
  Here you all go. There were some pretty cool ones in Japan.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 11:59 pm rating: 90
- #1.10 anglophile
  
  When there’s no garbage can around, I put my gum wrapper in my pocket. I expect the same courtesy from smokers: carry your litter with you until you can dispose of it. It’s not my problem your bit of litter is gross.
  
  And don’t get me started on drivers who throw their lit butts out the window.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 9:13 am rating: 90
- #1.11 mamason
  
  I drop my butts into passing strollers.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:27 am rating: 90
- #1.12 anglophile
  
  Finally! A practical solution to the problem!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:34 am rating: 90
- #1.13 mamason
  
  Just trying to do my part to keep America beautiful.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:38 am rating: 90
- #1.14 Z
  
  Ohhh, I love the ones that throw them out the window! You see what a big spark it makes when it hits the ground? Pretend you are the ground, as you ride your motorcycle. You hit a motorcyclist and they will bust off your fucking mirrors, maybe a side window. I know a guy who put his helmet through a car window because they did that. But he didn’t like being hit with red glowing cig butt…Karma.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:44 am rating: 90
- #1.15 Neeners
  
  Is that why I always get cholera when I go to Wal Mart CB?
  
  I thought I was making myself sick…
  but now that I think about it there are always at least two dirty diapers left in the parking lot there when I go. It’s like it is a magnet for bad mothers and stinky babies!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 2:08 pm rating: 90
- #1.16 infant tyrone
  
  Ashtrays in strollers ?
  There oughta be a law mandating this.
  Toughen up the little tykes + help clean up sidewalks at the same time.
  
  Smokers could refer to the new appurtenance as the Breeders Cup*.
  
  *There may be a copyright problem there. Will consult our favorite pony.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 3:32 pm rating: 90
- #1.17 StareClips.com
  
  Let’s imagine, for a moment, that the “poisonous” aspect to cigarette butts is when, say, a cute squirrel eats the left-overs of a half-smoked cigarette. Very rarely do smokers smoke all the way down to the filter, leaving absolutely none of the contents behind. Not to mention that the chemicals that have now passed through the filter have now made the filter toxic to animals that many don’t want to see die because of someone else’s unfortunate habit.
  
  Putting the toxicity aside, because that could be debated forever. Then, yes, an improperly disposed of cigarette butt is not much different than an improperly disposed of gum wrapper, for instance. However, if I saw someone toss a gum wrapper carelessly on the ground, I’d be just as upset. It’s not about *what* it is… it’s about the fact that it doesn’t belong where it is getting tossed.
  
  Now, for a moment, put aside the fact that the two actions (of throwing a cigarette butt on the ground or throwing a gum wrapper on the ground) are equally offensive. For those of us who understand that this is just “going to happen” and that complaining about it won’t “clean the streets”… there are kind citizens who take the time to pick up such objects when seen, and toss them into the appropriate receptacles. The problem is, a gum wrapper can be assumed to be relatively clean. It probably isn’t, but has the chance to be, which leaves hope, even if the hope is unfounded. A cigarette butt, however, has been burnt on one side, and the other side has been in a stranger’s mouth for a good period of time. This leaves the possibilities of either getting ashes on one’s fingers, or some stranger’s lipstick and/or saliva.
  
  So, really, for those who have to clean up other people’s mess, not all trash is the same… and a cigarette butt is pretty much on the “gross” list, but not as bad as a used diaper as someone else suggested.
  
  Jun 24, 2010 at 7:43 pm rating: 90
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#2 Heather

Oh get over it Anne! You should probably be more worried about things like the oil spill, and the thousands of other corporations who defile the planet. Sheesh!!

Jun 13, 2010 at 1:54 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #2.1 ashmeadow
  
  Yeah! And those children in Africa!
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 2:55 pm rating: 90
- #2.2 woodsey
  
  Yeah, there’s really some bad messes out there so we should all just throw our trash in the street.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:07 pm rating: 90
- #2.3 Canthz_B
  
  Interestingly, there are far more chewing gum wrappers and wads of gum in the streets than cigarette butts.
  And you don’t have to steam clean cigarette butts off the sidewalk.
  Another interesting thing, guess where used gum used to be frequently disposed of? That’s right!…In ashtrays.
  
  When was the last time you got a cigarette butt stuck on the sole of your shoe?
  In fact, you’ll probably never even touch someones cigarette butt, but if your hand slides under many surfaces in public places, you’ll likely encounter someones spit-wad of discarded gum.
  
  Dis-fucking-gusting!!
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:13 pm rating: 90
- #2.4 woodsey
  
  yeah, that’s how most of us feel about cig butts
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:26 pm rating: 90
- #2.5 Canthz_B
  
  That’s how most of us feel about all trash…I don’t think most people assign any moral values objections to certain types of trash and not other types.
  
  Light, er…lighten up.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 8:08 pm rating: 90
- #2.6 Z
  
  That’s right. Throw them on the ground and worry about something else!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:45 am rating: 90
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#3 Woman on the Verge

But I like smoked fish…

Jun 13, 2010 at 2:00 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #3.1 Rubber Chicken
  
  Yeah, but it’s that second hand (or would that be second fin) fish smoke that gets you.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:00 pm rating: 90
- #3.2 mamason
  
  And what do you do with the butts when you’re done?
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:29 am rating: 90
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#4 Woman on the Verge

I’m trying to make sense of the hieroglyphs on the last sign. A meteor hitting a penis, a buoy, an animal cracker, and a martini with an orange slice.

Those fish know how to party!

Jun 13, 2010 at 2:05 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #4.1 infant tyrone
  
  Bahamas, maybe…
  Might be from one of those R&R nature camps where they send pederast priests to shield them from the tender mercies of their former flocks.
  C(l)ockwise from top right could be:
  A fishing float;
  A chalice and host;
  A bear*;
  A bishop’s hat being chased (at some speed, too) by a female pubic icon.
  
  *poised to snag a fish like on Animal Planet or NatGeo
  
  Those good old Catholic boys sure know how to party.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 2:46 pm rating: 90
- #4.2 Kelly
  
  It’s a sign at the Atlantis resort. So the symbols are from the “lost city.”
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 7:05 pm rating: 90
- #4.3 Woman on the Verge
  
  Kelly, so in Atlantis they fear meteors hitting their penises?
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 5:38 am rating: 90
- #4.4 H for Toy
  
  That fear is actually more widespread than you might think.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 7:18 am rating: 90
- #4.5 mamason
  
  No, no,no. The first glyph is clearly the international symbol for smelly vaj with the penis making a hasty retreat.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:34 am rating: 90
- #4.6 Mo®
  
  “In one moon the fish god will count coup on your smelly vagina. The Penisii will dance and rejoice”
  
  Wha?? That isn’t what it says!?!?
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 1:37 pm rating: 90
- #4.7 Woman on the Verge
  
  I’m definitely going for Mo’s translation.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 6:26 pm rating: 90
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#5 Jackie

Heather, Why not just worry about both!

Jun 13, 2010 at 2:06 pm rating: 90

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- #5.1 Anne H
  
  /buys Jackie a drink at a popular tourist spot
  
  I am very concerned about corporate abuse of power and the environment.
  
  I am mildly annoyed by inconsiderate smokers.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 7:27 pm rating: 90
- #5.2 Canthz_B
  
  But, to Hell with those children in Africa!
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 9:21 pm rating: 90
- #5.3 infant tyrone
  
  Why’d yRwanda bring that up again?
  Liberal folks have lots of ideological sympathy.
  They just don’t know Hutu send the check to.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:07 am rating: 90
- #5.4 park rose
  
  That ain’t rock ‘n’ roll, ty.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 12:15 pm rating: 90
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#6 infant tyrone

I live in San Jose about 50 Km. or so from Turrialba. It’s all kindsa pricey.

If you’re looking to take out an injured or dead person, there are a number of affordable, yet fine, hospital cafeterias where you can do the former and one Haitian nightclub where you can(without involving Roky Erickson or the 13th Floor Elevators) walk with a zombie.

The cover charge on the Haitian place is, um, rather stiff, but zombies are way economical in food and beverage consumption, so it all evens out.
Plus, of course, they’re really good listeners and can stay out late.

Jun 13, 2010 at 2:09 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #6.1 FeRD
  
  Wow, thank you.
  
  To the best of my recollection, I’d never before heard of Roky Erickson, the 13th Floor Elevators, or… well, honestly, I can’t quite work out what song of theirs you’re referring to, but that’s OK.
  
  I feel enlightened! ….Well, less ignorant, anyway.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 9:18 pm rating: 90
- #6.2 infant tyrone
  
  From the Wiki for the film I Walked with a Zombie:
  
  Singer-Songwriter Roky Erickson, pioneer of the psychedelic rock genre and member of the 13th Floor Elevators, wrote a song titled “I Walked with a Zombie” which appeared his 1981 album The Evil One. Since then, the bands R.E.M., Alice Donut and Elf Power have covered this song.
  
  I thought it was from Roky’s pre-lockup days with the Elevators.
  Many miles on the mental odometer here, so cross-connections occur.
  
  Jun 15, 2010 at 11:40 pm rating: 90
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#7 ashmeadow

Why would you take dead or injured people out? I hear throwing people into volcanoes is a great method of recycling!

Jun 13, 2010 at 2:57 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #7.1 infant tyrone
  
  Throwing people into an erupting volcano is rapid and energy efficient.
  If it’s only slumbering, they just lie around in those sulfur pools decomposing and stinking up an otherwise enjoyable tourist attraction.
  Volcanoes are one of nature’s autoclaves…use ‘em when they’re hot.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:49 pm rating: 90
- #7.2 infant tyrone
  
  Why would you take dead or injured people out?
  We take the injured out for their benefit,
  and the dead for the benefit of all.
  So the injured will often say “Thank you”,
  but the dead aren’t grateful at all.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 4:55 pm rating: 90
- #7.3 Dara
  
  I’m not sure which would smell worse, the dead people or the sulfur pools.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 6:44 pm rating: 90
- #7.4 infant tyrone
  
  Sulfur pools are a fairly constant value; dead people get worse.
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 8:16 pm rating: 90
- #7.5 Canthz_B
  
  Ty, that’s (7.2) been going Around and Around the Attics of my Life leaving Bear Tracks all day!
  
  Jun 13, 2010 at 8:53 pm rating: 90
- #7.6 infant tyrone
  
  Under Consstruction;
  Waiting for a good joke to gel around “Dick’s Picks”.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:10 am rating: 90
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#8 Canthz_B

It’s really very inexpensive to take out the dead or injured. They don’t eat much at all.

Jun 13, 2010 at 4:16 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #8.1 H for Toy
  
  You know that depends. The dead can get expensive in terms of fines and that sort of thing. For some reason, bringing a dead body with you to a restaurant tends to be frowned on.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 7:35 am rating: 90
- #8.2 Mo®
  
  Well for one thing they are really lousy tippers unless they are lepers.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 1:40 pm rating: 90
- #8.3 infant tyrone
  
  Plus you have to sit in the molting section.
  
  Jun 15, 2010 at 11:28 pm rating: 90
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#9 Canthz_B

Haven’t the dead and injured already been taken out by something?

Jun 13, 2010 at 4:33 pm rating: 90

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#10 TeacherLady

These signs remind me of what I say to my students when they’re complaining about something like a hangnail.
Me: Are you going to die?
Student: No
Me: Good, because I have a strict policy against dying in my classroom.
Student laughs
Me: So if you think you’re going to die, let me know and we’ll move you to the hall.
Student: That’s not nice!

Jun 13, 2010 at 7:27 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #10.1 Woman on the Verge
  
  Kinda like what I tell my kids when I’m working in my home office:
  
  Do not interrupt me unless you are on fire.
  
  So far, no interruptions.
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 7:46 am rating: 90
- #10.2 mamason
  
  Unless you’re bleeding, broken or blistered, don’t interupt mommy when she’s in the bathroom. *It’s my home office.*
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:42 am rating: 90
- #10.3 FeRD
  
  I do have to say, TeacherLady — reading “Student laughs” in your scene, my immediate thought was that it seems like you either have unusually indulgent and engaged students, or a heroic capacity for self-delusion!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 9:22 pm rating: 90
- #10.4 TeacherLady
  
  Well, I’m a smartass, an unapologetic one, so when I veer from the subject at hand (English), my students tend to listen pretty intently. They never know when I might break into old-lady ghetto or something equally interesting. Also, as a teacher, I am pretty self-deluded. It comes with the job, that and psychosis.
  
  Jun 16, 2010 at 4:24 am rating: 90
- #10.5 Kimmypie
  
  Wow! And I thought I was the only teacher like that, TeacherLady…
  You are right. If we weren’t self-deluded & a bit psychotic, we would have chosen a different career.
  
  Jun 21, 2010 at 5:54 pm rating: 90
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#11 Canthz_B

Please do not drop cigarette butts on the ground.

Place them there gently, no one likes a bruised butt!!

Jun 13, 2010 at 9:17 pm rating: 90

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#12 oi

ha! our apartment greets with the note:
“Please pick up your own cigarette butts”
I always picture one of my smoking neighbors throwing his cigarette and then bending over to choose his own cigarette butt from the throngs (thanks rose) of butts covering our entrance. (Entrance is pretty clean but I can imagine whatever I want) Also that note writer does not have any problem with littering, on the contrary he actually encourages you tossing butts and then picking them up. I guess note writer is a pervert.

Jun 13, 2010 at 9:57 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #12.1 Kimmypie
  
  Oh, I justs had this mental image of a lot of little butts in thongs lying in a heap in your entryway…:P
  
  Jun 21, 2010 at 5:56 pm rating: 90
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#13 Xenobiologista

Sign #2 reminds me of this: http://failbook.com/2010/06/11/funny-facebook-fails-why-assume-dolphin-eats-chicken/

Jun 13, 2010 at 10:33 pm rating: 90

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#14 Traveler

Love all of them but the 1st one especially at the moment. Tourists can be such idiots, thinking that because they’re tourists they’re immune from local dangers. I too would be more worried about the costs of taking a dead idiot out than losing the idiot; Darwin had a point after all.

Jun 14, 2010 at 7:38 am rating: 90

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#15 Bunnee

I find it comforting that fishies get nic fits just like the rest of us smokers!

Jun 14, 2010 at 11:40 am rating: 90

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#16 martialartiste

SCHNAPPI!!!

Jun 14, 2010 at 12:22 pm rating: 90

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- #16.1 Gemma
  
  That’s just what I was going to say!
  
  I’m now singing Ich bin Schnappi, das Kleine Krokodil…..
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 1:38 pm rating: 90
- #16.2 Mo®
  
  I have noticed that the Croc neighbors in the US comic Pearls Before Swine looks a lot like Schnappi. Copy Cat@!!!!!!!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 1:45 pm rating: 90
- #16.3 Fruppi
  
  Oh good, I’m glad someone else noticed Schnappi! I thought he got lost in all the ranting about cigarette butts. Schni-Schna-Schnappi, Schnappi, schnappi schnapp!
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 8:05 pm rating: 90
- #16.4 Carly
  
  Same reaction here! I’m gonna go and watch that video right this second!
  
  Jun 18, 2010 at 9:07 pm rating: 90
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#17 Scott

hahaha The last one is my favorite. I have a picture of that sign too. Went there in 2000.
It’s at the Atlantis resort on Paradise Island.

Jun 14, 2010 at 12:47 pm rating: 90

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#18 Neeners

I had no idea death was going to be costly and expensive.

How inconsiderate….I vow to never die and cause someone unnecessary expense. Pardon me!

Jun 14, 2010 at 2:12 pm rating: 90

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#19 Neeners

I actually agree with the second sign. Those poor animals have done nothing to warrant being stuck in their cages, so get your dumb asses off the fence before you give them a tummy ache too!

Jun 14, 2010 at 2:14 pm rating: 90

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#20 B

The first one reminds me of this from Kauai:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bvcphoto/3813370535/in/set-72157621870630115/
Apparenly, only tourists die.

Jun 14, 2010 at 3:07 pm rating: 90

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- #20.1 Xenobiologista
  
  Possibly because the locals know to not go swimming at beaches with dangerous currents?
  
  Jun 14, 2010 at 11:06 pm rating: 90
- #20.2 B
  
  Why I said “apparenl[t]y”.
  
  But, not that I think locals go to that particular beach much at all, you don’t have to go swimming to get caught there. The warning signs were actually understatements.
  
  Jun 15, 2010 at 9:46 am rating: 90
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#21 Limeliberator

I like the second sign.. The clip art is Schnappi.. (If you’re not familiar, check out the video on youtube..)

Jun 15, 2010 at 11:14 pm rating: 90

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#22 John

I have been right in front of that sign at Turrialba Volcano after a looong horse ride. Lemme tell you. It is right where you start a hike down into the crater of the volcano (about 1.5 km!) There is ample opportunity for death or serious injury, no doubt about it, and there sure as hell won’t be an ambulance coming to get you. If you aren’t fit, you may set up house there to avoid the heart attack you would get climbing back out.

Jun 24, 2010 at 8:47 pm rating: 90

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#23 911? I’m calling to report a serious disturbance of my beauty sleep. | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

[...] related: Don’t die; it’s expensive. [...]

Jun 24, 2010 at 10:03 pm rating: 90

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#24 Daddy, why are all the cages empty? | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

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Jul 15, 2010 at 5:11 pm rating: 90

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#25 Funniest (not necessarily passive-aggressive) notes of 2010 | PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

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Jan 4, 2011 at 10:18 pm rating: 90

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