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Roommate revenge on wheels

June 15th, 2010 · 61 comments

Heather saw this car parked in her Takoma Park, Maryland neighborhood, while Heather spotted the truck below in New Orleans. Perhaps Stephanie and Michael can form a support group with Rene Hall?

Stephanie [redacted] appropriates other people's property and destroys other people's belongings

Michael [redacted] Parks Like An Idiot

related: You lied to me, Mr. Lundegaard.

FILED UNDER: car · graffiti · New Orleans · parking · Takoma Park

61 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Silver

    Eyyy… vandalism. Lol!

    Oh shit! First! NOOOOO

    Jun 15, 2010 at 9:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #2   Wendy

    No worries, I’m sure that’s Tempra paint.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 9:42 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Zenith Fishstix

      Or tempura paint.

      Jun 15, 2010 at 9:54 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Neeners

      You can paint and deep fry shrimp with it!

      Jun 15, 2010 at 10:39 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   RAM

      Unless the painter is planning on frying and eating that truck, it’s tempera paint.

      Jun 15, 2010 at 10:45 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   thx sandra

      that tempura paint was fucking delicious

      Jun 16, 2010 at 1:09 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   Fridge Pirate

      My thoughts exactly.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 9:57 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #3   Wade bang

    Dayum! Treach is reduced to driving a hoopty!

    I won’t get into that, I’ll do it…ah…sorta properly
    I say the last P…hmmm…stands for property

    Jun 15, 2010 at 9:54 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #4   Sofar

    Dang this sort of thing makes me so angry. You do not mess with cars.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 9:58 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   seacurs

      Unless they mess with you first. I don’t take any shit from cars. Especially Fords. Those smartasses.

      Jun 15, 2010 at 10:08 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   Canthz_B bang

      I mess with cars…well, only those with nice, tight tailpipes and come hither bodies.


      Jun 16, 2010 at 3:21 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   HandyMarigolds

      Word on the street is it doesn’t take much to annoy Ric Ocasek.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 1:02 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #4.4   infant tyrone bang

      On the other hand, Gary Numan sez cars keep him stable for days.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 1:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #5   veritybrown

    Vandalism is pond-scummy. But I have to admit I like the car-top sign (assuming that it is on the accuser’s car, not the target’s). No revenge is so satisfying as damaging your enemy’s ego.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:06 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   HandyMarigolds

      I saw a really benevolent one in a grocery-store parking lot. Some mammoth SUV was straddling the line diagonally, and a good Samaritan wrote “Park better!” in the dust on the rear window. Impermanent, gentle, and effective.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 9:49 am   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   Madrias bang

      I’m a fan of printing up sheets of paper that have the headline “You Park Like An Asshole!” written on there, with various checkboxes for the basics (’2 Spots, one car’, ‘Too Fucking Close’, Litterbug’) and a nice ‘other’ column that leaves the rest of the 1/4 sheet of paper wide open for writing the last of their offenses on.

      I’ve found it’s quite useful… And deliciously passive-aggressive.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 3:23 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   The Elf

      One of the advantages of riding a motorcycle is that I can easily use that half-space that is left. But there’s always a part of me worried that if they parked that badly, would they run over my bike when they leave?

      If I take the half-space I always hope they see the silent declaration of “See! This is how badly you park! Only a motorcycle can fit here!” If they’re the kind of ass who parked in two spots to protect their oh-so-precious car, I just upstaged them.

      ‘Cause I’m that petty.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 3:30 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   Madrias bang

      I’ve done that before. People tend to realize my Honda Goldwing is worth more than their car, so they tend to leave it alone. Other than the small fan-club that it draws because it’s such a nice bike.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 3:34 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   Scribbles the Monkey bang

      Madrias: I think I’ve seen a video on the Internet called “two spots, one car.” Or something.

      Jun 17, 2010 at 11:02 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #6   Dibs

    whats so passive aggressive about defacing someones property? Writing a note is one thing, don’t touch someones car!

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:07 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #7   Neeners

    The first note writer is mistakenly assuming that most people know what appropriate even means and that we have some sort of decent education! I had to go get my dictionary and to me that just does not a good PA note make!

    Now the second one, white trash all the way, a guy or gal after my own heart, crime of passion.

    The time it took to make that first sign, the care and (I’m hoping the special rack was already on there) thought makes me scared of this person! I think it’s Stewie!

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:43 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

  • #8   JetJackson

    In all fairness Michael is parked like an idiot… there is barely any space for the car in front to get out. At least the vandal had the decency to choose a spray paint colour that works well with the vehicle.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:46 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   HandyMarigolds

      I noticed that, too. The tone-on-tone thing really flatters the truck’s body type.

      And is it just me, or is Michael also partially blocking a driveway?

      Jun 16, 2010 at 9:51 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

  • #9   Duderina

    if I wasn’t such a coward I would GLADLY spray paint and scratch every single door of every single car that parks on the bike lane in my neighborhood. Just because their vehicles are bigger and make noise they think they can do whatever the fuck they want! and since you can’t spend your entire day waiting for the asshole to comeback to his/her car to punch him/her in the face, you JUST HAVE to go passive-aggresive like there’s no tomorrow.
    Please don’t park like an asshole.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:48 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Serenity

      Ah, screw you and your stupid bike. I don’t WANT to share the road with some pansy dressed in spandex, who thinks his piece of tin should be able to ride 6 inches away from 2 tons of steel. Half the time you idiots don’t even STAY in the bike lane. Go to the park, ride some trails. The roads are for real boys and girls.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 10:20 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #9.2   HandyMarigolds

      The roads are for grown men and women who can read and interpret basic traffic laws. My experience says drivers, cyclists, and peds all suck at this about equally.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 11:41 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

    • #9.3   Sirius¤ bang

      Independent studies have proven that, when compared to motorists, cyclists are much healthier and live happier lives, until they carelessly ride into the path of my car.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 12:18 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

    • #9.4   oi

      Just this morning, a motorist tried to kill me but I was prepared for his malicious intentions. I was on the trail that crossed the street and he has a stop sign but he just ran through it @40 MPH. They don’t lie when they say that motorists are predators looking for a kill.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 1:02 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #9.5   Madrias bang

      Serenity, obviously you don’t live up to the meaning of your name, and obviously drive like an asshole. I assume you drive a huge gas-guzzling SUV because most of your type flock to them. Roads are for humans to travel on, whether they are in a motor vehicle, riding a motorcycle, on a bicycle, or walking (preferably through a crosswalk).

      Roads, however, are not for you to throw your trash, to skateboard on (that’s what the park is for), or to run people over. If you can’t share the road, get the fuck off of it.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 3:28 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #9.6   HandyMarigolds

      Madrias, “Serenity” doesn’t always mean inner calm. Sometimes it means a spaceship with a lot of sarcastic people on it, and sometimes it means adult diapers.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 4:01 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #9.7   Serenity

      Wow, thanks for taking my comment waaaayyy too seriously. I am actually none of those things that you assumed, and as for serenity, it’s pretty easy to see here who could actually use some of it. (hint: not me) . I did love that movie, tho! toodles , and I hope no one pees in your cheerios yet again tomorrow :)

      Jun 16, 2010 at 4:23 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #9.8   Madrias bang

      I knew of the spaceship (I’ve watched the series Firefly before, and the partner movie).

      As far as the sarcastic comment, text doesn’t carry through that well. I believe you were trying to be sarcastic, but I read it as an offensive comment toward cyclists (of which I am one) and so took it somewhat personally.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 4:24 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #9.9   HandyMarigolds

      Never underestimate the power of quotation marks. Sometimes they help your “sarcasm” carry over “better.”

      And yeah, Firefly was pretty awesome.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 4:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.10   Serenity

      HM, was that series really good, too? I’ve only watched the movie, I heard the series was a lot different, and not sure if I’d like it. I have it on my netflix instant queue, but haven’t watched it yet…

      Jun 16, 2010 at 5:20 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.11   Madrias bang

      The series is different, but good. The first episode (Pilot episode, and twice as long) is a little slow, but helps with learning the series. You might not need to watch it as some is covered by Serenity.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 6:19 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #9.12   HandyMarigolds

      I saw the movie before the series, too. I would even dare to call the series better than the movie.

      Jun 17, 2010 at 9:42 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.13   GhostWriter bang

      I feel the exact same way about “Land of the Lost”.

      Jun 17, 2010 at 9:58 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.14   Scribbles the Monkey bang

      “Durr I ride a bike, look at me!!”

      That’s what you sound like.


      Jun 17, 2010 at 11:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #9.15   Ashley

      Then I will gladly run over you and your pansy bicycle. I will start caring about your “rights” shortly after you realize you’re not a vehicle and thus get the fuck out of the street. :D

      Jun 27, 2010 at 8:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #10   Xyzzy

    The first one I can completely understand — taking & wrecking people’s belongings really isn’t cool.

    The second one, I can only hope that’s some form of paint that’s easily removed. Makes me wonder what “Michael” did (beyond parking improperly) to make someone angry enough to perhaps-permanently trash his paint job like that, though!

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:57 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #11   BeQui

    At first I thought the truck gate said, “I am an Asian.”

    Jun 15, 2010 at 10:59 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   infant tyrone bang

      Until you realized that they weren’t double or triple parked ?

      Jun 15, 2010 at 11:16 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #11.2   Tim P.

      Hey, I’m Asian and I park and drive much more decently than most white people.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 4:00 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #11.3   infant tyrone bang

      I lived in Seattle for 10 years and the only area I saw cars consistently double-parked was in the “International District”. I spent months visiting San Francisco on multiple occasions and Chinatown was the same.
      Maybe there are similar parking practices in the Chaldean areas of Detroit, Italian areas of NYC, and other urban ethnic enclaves. Maybe.
      I didn’t say anything about driving. Glad to hear that yours is good.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 5:09 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #11.4   Canthz_B bang

      Why do people think that if they’re “only going to be a couple of minutes” they’re not blocking traffic for a couple of minutes when they double park?
      Why is it always the couple of minutes I happen to be trying to drive by?

      Jun 16, 2010 at 8:42 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #11.5   infant tyrone bang

      Because they’re in a genuine semi-emergency or just selfish assholes.

      CKarma from a previous lifetime ?
      Rhythms of the universe ?
      Leave the blues harp in the glove box at home and see if it
      reduces the odds of being involved in a harmonica convergence !

      Jun 16, 2010 at 1:22 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #12   We shall speak anon

    The first note was written by Michael, addressed to Stephanie after she appropriated his spray paint can (he’s a sign painter, as is clearly indicated by the quality of the lettering on the first photo) and destroyed his “belongings” (i.e., his truck).

    Humiliated in front of his compatriots in the Big Easy, Michael did what any jilted sign painter would — he set out north, broadcasting his heartfelt tale to all who cared to read it from Interstate 59 to I-81.

    Jun 15, 2010 at 11:53 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

  • #13   Matthew

    I guess this wasn’t public enough ;) hehe

    Jun 16, 2010 at 12:50 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Nahhh

      Um…enjoyed…that. Thanks for the link. [GAH!]

      Jun 16, 2010 at 12:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #14   Penny

    Stephanie has appropriated the front wheel trims of both these vehicles

    Jun 16, 2010 at 1:33 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #15   Canthz_B bang

    Stephanie must have some shit with her, if doing her in the back seat results in a rusted out car when she steals your virginity.

    Jun 16, 2010 at 3:07 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #16   Canthz_B bang

    Poor Michael.
    If he’d have showed up on that special day, his car would only read “Just Married”.

    Alas, his car was spotted (by a gaggle of bridesmaids) parked askew at the local Kitty Kat Klub instead of the church parking lot.

    Yes, they travel packing yellow spray-paint.

    Jun 16, 2010 at 3:15 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

  • #17   Angela

    If Stephanie destroyed my other belongings and didn’t even touch that POS car, I’d be pissed, too. At least then, she would have done me a solid and let me get some insurance money.

    Jun 16, 2010 at 6:54 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

  • #18   Pterosaur

    “Stephanie appropriates other people’s property.” So… she works at Small Claims Court?

    If you insist on using words from your SAT study guide, at least choose one with a more concise definition.

    “Stephanie purloins other people’s property.”

    Jun 16, 2010 at 9:38 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   infant tyrone bang

      Appropriates she don’t…commandeers she does ?

      She be a pirate, she purrloins (thalvages?) ships that are cat-thighsed.

      Jun 16, 2010 at 10:51 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #19   claire

    bitches be crazy

    Jun 16, 2010 at 11:14 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Atheist Scum Unite!


      Jun 16, 2010 at 2:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #20   pirate stephanie

    Arrggh, I be purloining, matey.

    Jun 16, 2010 at 11:45 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #21   obrienatrix

    Oooh, I have been so sorely tempted… but thank you for continuing to post such things, thus keeping the likes of me out of temptation and jail.
    Over at my blog I’ve taken the liberty of giving you a Versatility Award, for being versatile. It’s one of those “say seven things about yourself” memes; though frankly, any seven PANs would do the job nicely…

    Jun 16, 2010 at 4:38 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #22   Lisap

    Both these notes just makes me really want to know what the people did, especially Stephanie.

    And if the parking job in the photo was the motivation for the “note” I’d really like to know what else went wrong in the note leaver’s day.

    Jun 16, 2010 at 5:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #23   MC

    First picture looks totally Photoshopped.

    Jun 26, 2010 at 12:36 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up


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