Comments on: Stone cold crazy like a fox

By: Divvitar

Divvitar — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 16:11:04 +0000

Gee, thanks, MIL! You forgot I’m lactose intolerant!

–Jennifer.

By: ammali

ammali — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 18:44:38 +0000

I’m wondering where you people live and what you get at Cold Stone that would cost that much? It’s been a while since I went but I’m positive it’s less than $5 for a scoop in a cone. Unless you’re getting some super-sized giant quadruple scoop in a dipped waffle bowl with 11 different candies mixed in, how is it $15?

By: Max Time

Max Time — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 14:37:41 +0000

I think jennifer’s mother in law is trying to bring jennifer to the dark side of the ice cream force

By: Janellionaire

Janellionaire — Sat, 07 Aug 2010 00:41:34 +0000

Food as a gift is ok. But a gift certificate for ICE CREAM as a congrats on losing weight is inappropriate and seems unsupportive. Maybe a nice Starbuck’s card?

By: FeRD

FeRD — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 23:09:44 +0000

I hear that. As relatives on one side of my family ballooned with age, and I managed (not even out of my 20′s, yet) to keep my weight down in the “could stand to lose a few” range, I found I had to avoid even making eye contact with them. Out of fear of a loudly-delivered (and entirely unprovoked) “response” such as, “Yeah, I know I’m fat!”

Apparently, relatives can read minds even when we don’t know what terrible things we’re thinking! I can only imagine what smug, awful thoughts M-i-L was picking up from that evil Jennifer!

By: FeRD

FeRD — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 22:59:48 +0000

Waaaait, interpretations at the passive-aggressivenotes site tend to be hypersensitive to passive-aggressiveness??? Heaven forfend!

By: FeRD

FeRD — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 22:58:15 +0000

Yikes, that sounds familiar. It’s that guy I’ve been fooling around with all over again!

By: RunBarbara

RunBarbara — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 21:04:51 +0000

I use hookers as a reward. Then I steal their clothes (double reward).

By: RunBarbara

RunBarbara — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 20:59:52 +0000

One time my grandmother gave me an Easy Bake Oven for Christmas when all I asked for was a treadmill and some ephedrine. The wrinkled old bitch didn’t even have the decency to include the low-carb cupcake packets, just some bullshit peanut butter shortbread mix. I couldn’t let that kind of bold faced disrespect go unchecked, so I proceeded to explain to my grandmother exactly how hard it is to lose one pound. I talked about ketosis and metabolic rates, I showed her my impeccably detailed food diary and my color-coded bar graph tracking my weight loss. She still just blinked stupidly, like an orphaned seal cub, and implied that maybe my diet was “making me cranky”.

I cracked my knuckles and told granny that if she didn’t understand and support my goals, I would just have to try a different weight loss plan which I offered to demonstrate for her. Let me tell you, after feeding her Easy Baked treats for a couple of hours and then hacking off two pounds of her grizzled liver-spotted flesh to account for the increased caloric intake, she started coming correct with the gift giving.

By: mamason

mamason — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 20:40:36 +0000

Everything on this list, with the exception of the gift card, has happened to me. I blogged about this weeks ago after one of her visits.

By: Angela

Angela — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 19:19:03 +0000

If $15 is just enough after she’s lost weight, she probably needs to lose more weight.

By: sleeps

sleeps — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 19:07:48 +0000

I really need to start keeping her notes and emails to submit. It’s very therapeutic to share her exploits. I just thank sweet Jebus she lives on the other side of the country.

By: Splint Chesthair

Splint Chesthair — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 18:42:07 +0000

That’s my point, “dieting” is not healthy. A healthy relationship with food means learning how to have a gosh darn ice cream cone once in a while without freaking out.

By: Splint Chesthair

Splint Chesthair — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 18:39:49 +0000

naybe a $15 dollar certificate to a clothing shop comes off as cheap because, you really can’t get anything without dishing out money. It’s basically a coupon at that point.

Jeezus, I don’t know, so maybe you can’t buy food as a gift anymore for fear that hypersensitives will freak out about it?