These notes — the first from on office in California, the second from an office in Arkansas — both seem like they’re following the same not-quite-finished flowchart for acceptable office paper usage.
Really, you’re in for a scolding no matter what. And as our submitter Hannah noticed — in this bizarre exchange from the copy room at a school in Spartanburg, South Carolina — contrition only seems to further incense the office Paper Nazis.
related: Nothing fosters community like shared networked printers!
49 responses so far ↓
#1
Dan
Hmmm… post-it hater from pic #1 would not be satisfied with any of these wastes of paper… or life.
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:00 pm rating: 1
#2
Cathryn Bauer
I consider myself an avid recycler, but really…please….
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:09 pm rating: 2
#3
se
In the first instance, when someone wants to use a post-it, they first need to remove the note.. do ya think they’ll replace it on the top? or just toss it in a trash can?
maybe the same is written on the whole pad?
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:15 pm rating: 6
#4
Kay
#2 made me laugh loudly because — really — isn’t the bigger worry that the printout’s owner cannot remember a three-item shopping list and where to get those three items without making a list?
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:38 pm rating: 13
#5
Joe Blow
Wasting paper ensures there will be post-consumer recycling for Starbucks heat sleeves in the future. I print every post on this website.
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:41 pm rating: 4
#6
Joe Blow
The proper response to #2 is to print the list out three times, and write a note on the first one, noting that by writing on the person’s “white space”, it required them to print a new one. So, you printed three extras. One for the note, one in case another a-hole like the original writer worked in the office, and a thrid to go to home depot and walmart.
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:45 pm rating: 2
#7
J
We have one guy at my work who takes packs of post it notes, separates all the notes, and puts them back together into paper fans. Much to the annoyance of the rest of us.
Aug 29, 2010 at 7:50 pm rating: 2
#8
LainTexas
Dear G-d, the commentator on note 3 needs to get a grip. It’s just a piece of paper! She needs to switch to decaf in short order.
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:05 pm rating: 7
#9
aaa
The Note Writer #1 is just frustrated that their coworkers have not yet mastered the art of making Notepad and TextEdit files stick directly to papers, cubicles, lunches about to be stolen from the break room fridge, etc. They tried printing the notes out first, but that wasn’t good enough for Note Writer. I’m sorry Note Writer, but we can’t all be smart enough to figure out how to affix a computer program directly to physical surfaces! Have a little compassion! I know you’re trying to make an appearance of empathy, but I know there’s hate and condescension roiling beneath the “If not, recycle when you’re done!!” line.
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:17 pm rating: 15
#10
aaa
Murder? Rape? Arson?
Does not compare to your sin!
Please recycle, bitch
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:20 pm rating: 12
#11
People Person
Hey, dummy, that note was on tree-free cotton paper.
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:26 pm rating: 3
#12
Party in my pants
In our office a woman lets her 7 year old come in and draw and cut up paper with a friend for a couple of hours. Then she stands there the next day in her cubicle covered in drawings and asks “what can we do to conserve paper? The upstairs office won’t give us any more!” I just bite my tongue… I should be more PA.
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:27 pm rating: 17
#13
ShellyB
Why didn’t commenter #2 make note of the gas she’d waste going to 2 different stores that both sell the three items on the list instead of getting it all at one or the other store?
Aug 29, 2010 at 8:48 pm rating: 7
#14
infant tyrone
#1 Is the recycling urgency due to the paper in the post-it or the ink on it ?
#2 Is a page with the word Untitled at its top center point “untitled” ?
#3 … that should be struck from the earth !!
If this is the state of teacher handwriting today,
then we all may be, as cursive most clearly is, doomed.
Check the leading “t” in “that” against it’s foppish cousin, the trailing “t”.
Recall both while the “t” from “struck” screams, begging to be crossed.
This is neither a retort nor a riposte, but a remonstrance in parallel with the greatest meltdown since Margaret Hamilton’s vanishing act.
Aug 29, 2010 at 10:58 pm rating: 1
#15
Canthz_B
I say they should all be slruklc from the earth!!
It’s been years since we’ve seen a good slruklcing around here, and I say it’s high time we lit a bonfire and had at it!!
Aug 30, 2010 at 1:43 am rating: 10
#16
Mrs Rochester
Yeah, Spartanburg! WE’RE FAMOUS!
…For striking people from earth….
Aug 30, 2010 at 9:27 am rating: 0
#17
Melanie
Scene: A smoky coffeeshop filled with bohemians. A man in a black turtleneck and matching beret sits at a stool in front of a microphone. He pulls deeply from a clove cigarette.
“I call this one … ‘Untitled,’” he mutters. A soft beat emanates from the bongo drummer in the left wing.
The poet begins:
“Walmart. Two. plastic. tubs.”
*thumpa thumpa thump* says the bongo.
“Home. …. Depot.”
*thwacka thump*
“perlite.”
*THUMP!*
“plastic.”
“tube.”
*feathery drumbeat* *Thwack!*
The poet drops his head to his chest. The spotlight is extinguished. The air fills with the appreciative snaps of the bohemian crowd at this masterpiece, a shining example of the ways in which The Man forces us into a life of meaningless consumption. Plastic tubs indeed! Damn The Man! Eat the Rich! Recycling is for the bourgeosie!
Aug 30, 2010 at 11:06 am rating: 23
#18
ivbeenthere
Way to let your entire office know about your marijuana grow op #2.
Aug 30, 2010 at 11:49 am rating: 4
#19
Oriole
This brought back some unpleasant flashbacks….I worked at a small company years ago with an extremely anal-retentive cheapskate boss. How cheap was he? He’d rifle through the trash bags left out in the hallways in our office building and retrieve any 8 1/2 X 11 sheets of paper that were only printed on one side and we used those pages in our copier and fax machine. And any employee who used an entire 3″ X 3″ Post-It note for a four or five word message only made that mistake once – after a very vehement dressing-down from Boss they learned to cut an appropriate small strip from the regulation Post-It page for use with brief notes.
Aug 31, 2010 at 12:42 am rating: 1
#20
peaches
mrs. rochester, infant tyrone, and liscarian, yall aren’t the only ones…i’m representing the ‘burg too!!! way to be PA sparkle city!!!
Sep 1, 2010 at 10:54 am rating: 0
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