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Vehicular misogyny

September 24th, 2010 · 84 comments

“I guess I’m a bad parker,” says Renee in San Antonio — but really, how bad does a parking job have to be to inspire this kind of blind rage? Especially when the scene of the crime is the parking lot outside a big box store like Best Buy, not some precious residential block.

P.S. If you’re thinking “PMS bad,” next time I escape from the kitchen, I might have to give you a barefoot kick to the crotch.

Dear Asshole, Next [time?] you get your fat inconsiderate ass out of your piece of shit, take a look at the impeccable parking job. Its [sic] underdeveloped people like you that make the rest of the world wish for an apocolypse [sic]. thanks!! PS If you are a woman shame on your husband for allowing you to leave the house

related: When parking gets political

FILED UNDER: casual sexism · p.s. · parking · San Antonio · spelling and grammar police

84 responses so far ↓

  • #1   thrall bang

    Is it just me, or is this really girly handwriting?

    Sep 24, 2010 at 7:56 am   rating: 66  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Annette

      It is absolutely girly handwriting.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 7:59 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   Grumpy McGrumperson

      Funny, I was thinking the same thing. Sounds like someone’s feminine side is trying to sneak out and have some fun.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:40 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   Ed Depaine

      Quit writing notes, that sammich isn’t going to make itself!

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:52 am   rating: 37  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   El Jefe

      I daresay it was a woman who wrote this. A man would be considerable less likely to consider ‘fat…ass’ a insult. And much less likely to give “Thanks!!!” its own line/indentation.

      Women wishing subjugation/submission on other women is less common, but certainly not unheard of. It reminds me of the unpopular kids on the playground who insult their own mothers first to steal the bullies’ thunder.

      That is a weird piece of paper though, bound semi-college-ruled but no margin up top and two holes?

      Sep 24, 2010 at 9:53 am   rating: 24  small thumbs up

    • #1.5   Pterosaur

      It looks like a page from those calendar planners that they give to high school freshmen to track assignments. Ragey McDouche probably dictated his tirade to his teenage son while he tried to squeeze his doublewide Hummer into a single parking spot.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:38 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #1.6   pasquared

      It’s from a DCK Design notebook. I have a small one like that with the colored (blue, red, gray, and green) edges and small rectangle at the top. Although, mine is perforated, so pages can be easily torn out. I bought it in my college bookstore for $4.29.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 9:57 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

  • #2   MAMARILLA2 bang

    Underdeveloped yet Fat assed, Male yet female, impeccable yet sloppy parking..Inconsiderate and apocalyptical…the Whole Package.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 7:59 am   rating: 22  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   farcical aquatic ceremony

      And to think: that’s EXACTLY what my e-Harmony profile read, and I got zero takers…

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:07 am   rating: 94  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   clumber

      FAC; I was going to thumb you… but I just couldn’t when i noticed that your thumb rating is an ever-so-sexy 69. Just didn’t have the heart to mess that.

      Sep 27, 2010 at 8:53 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #3   driver

    I’m on team note writer here. People don’t leave notes like this when you are a little crooked, you must have really parked horribly. If you did and you are too lazy to fix it you deserve said note!

    Sep 24, 2010 at 7:59 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Rattus

      I beg to differ. You know that someone sporting that degree of misogyny is a huge douche, and huge douches tend to become enraged by the smallest things.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:02 am   rating: 66  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Splint Chesthair

      Looks like girly handwriting to me.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:44 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #3.3   Ed Depaine

      Of course it is girly writing he had his little woman write it. He couldn’t be bothered with such things. He had manly stuff to do.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:53 am   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #3.4   Shannon

      Unless they double/triple parked in a handicap spot this is so fucking unjustified. That female note-writer sounds like she needs a giant slice of bitch cake. With a side of anger management.

      Leaving undeserved rage filled notes on a strangers car makes the rest of the world wish there was an apocalypse in their parents reproductive systems.

      In other news, STFU, Parents has a hilarious categories of entitlement mombies about ‘expectant mom/mom with children’ parking. I have a feeling there is some underlying connection….

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:49 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #3.5   Mo®

      Maybe she had the Bitch Salad© at The Pasta Company?

      Sep 24, 2010 at 3:06 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #3.6   Suzanne

      WTF? How does ANYONE deserve a note like that? What if someone said that to your girlfriend/wife/mother or any other woman you love? Wouldn’t you be completely offended? There’s not a person out there that is worthy of that note.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:09 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #3.7   April

      I agree. I think the note is awful and all but if you park badly, you kinda open yourself up to stuff like this. Don’t want notes, don’t park like an asshole

      Sep 25, 2010 at 6:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #4   Lee

    In the interests of a fair and balanced report, you really should have taken a photo of your parking so we can tell if this is unreasonable or not.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:01 am   rating: 62  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   attgig

      agreed. If you really had a bad parking job, we all could’ve written passive agressive posts in response to your parking job as well. then you would’ve been able to submit even more notes!

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:38 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   The Elf

      I gotta know. Renee, how bad was it? Were you parked diagonally across four spaces or something? Open your door into the neighbor car door?

      Or is this person really that big of a douchecanoe? I’m going for douchecanoe on misogyny alone, but I’d love to know what sparked it. This would be so much more awesome if I knew it was sparked by a slightly-crooked-but-still-in-the-space compact car.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:56 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   nelle

      clearly Renee works for Fox news

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:16 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #5   cali

    I hope you are a woman because they are the ones I like to bash the most. If you were a man I would have to accuse you of being a stupid immigrant, which isn’t quite as much fun, but close.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:12 am   rating: 33  small thumbs up

  • #6   the Librarian

    I thought it was starting with an instruction to get out of the car. “Next, you get your fat, inconsiderate ass out of your piece of shit…” I was so confused. Why would she be writing this note with the driver still sitting in the car. Then it dawned on me.

    The missing word in the first sentence, the missing apostrophe in “it’s,” and is that a period after “its”? All of these things put me firmly in the corner of the bad parker. No matter how poor the parking job, this writing is worse.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:24 am   rating: 41  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   The Elf

      I’ve always wondered why more people don’t take a few extra seconds to proofread their outpouring of rage, incoherent manifestos, snarky post-its, incomprehensible office memos, and moments of disturb. Please, people, carry two sheets of paper with you so that you can edit and rewrite your passive aggressive notes! Friends don’t let friends misspell!

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:01 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

  • #7   J

    Team Note-Writer. I’ve had to climb in the rear passenger side to get to the driver’s seat too many times. It’s enough to make me wish I hated my car enough to scrape the side of the bad parker’s car. People who are too stupid to park inside the lines and too entitled to fix it deserve to hear about it. I’d leave my number though cause I’d love to have them call at me so I can yell directly at them.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:40 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   Grumpy McGrumperson

      Wow, bad parking deserves unabashed misogyny? Who knew? I learn something every day.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 8:43 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   Noelegy

      Wow. Speaking as someone who gets yelled at over the phone on a daily basis as part of my job, I’ve got to admire your guts!

      Sep 27, 2010 at 9:19 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #8   Gunderson

    “Underdeveloped”? Is that like an A- cup size?

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:42 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Bunnee

      That’s what I thought. Either that, or a pencil dick, depending on the gender of the shitty parker.

      Well, now I see that the shitty parker is a woman. So, definitely an A cup.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 9:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   The voice of... James Mason

      hey, I’m an A cup AND the proud possessor of a large, if not inconsiderate, ass. But I am an exemplary parker. I’m not sure, therefore, if there exists enough evidence to support a direct correlation between parking ability and cup size…

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:21 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   Gladystopia

      Trust me, there isn’t.

      I have an ample set of hoots, and I STILL park like crap.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:09 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #8.4   Ed Depaine

      I don’t believe you. Without a picture it isn’t true.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:22 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #8.5   H for Toy bang

      I’m with you, Gladystopia. Though, I’d say I was a moderately bad parker.

      And I’m wondering about Ed. Posts about sammiches and his little woman. Now he wants to see the hooters… Ed, did you have your wife write this note?

      Sep 24, 2010 at 2:42 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #8.6   Ed Depaine

      I am a widower. My first wife Dixie was a midget showgirl in Las Vegas. I am a steelworker and met her there. She would write notes for me but they were sweet ones that she would put in my lunch. Yes, that’s right, she made me sammiches. I would do anything to have her back making my sammiches. I loved her and I still do.
      It was just a joke, you know.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 3:02 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #8.7   H for Toy bang

      I know, Ed. So was mine.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 3:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #8.8   eslinger bang

      My heart was aching for you, poor Ed, until I read the part about it being a joke. Way to play with my emotions on the Internet, jerk. *tear*

      Sep 25, 2010 at 10:07 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #9   Splint Chesthair

    I had someone park crooked next to me where their front bumper basically touched behind my front bumper making it impossible for me to backup without hitting their bumper. There was a car in the parking space in front so I couldn’t pull through either. Luckily, my bumper is an all metal cow-catcher or roo-bar so it won’t bend and I just backed up and cracked the other bumper in the process. But if I had a regular car and it was expensive, I’d be stuck there.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:44 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   ISpy

      There’s that roo bar again, Splint…

      Me: Kangaroos drinking Foster’s — but then that would be a roo pub.
      You: Shame on your husband for allowing you to leave the house.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:26 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #9.2   Splint Chesthair

      Sometimes I just don’t understand why people DON’T have a roo-bar on there cars. Pretty useful if you ask me. Add those blades on the wheels a la Spartacus and you’re a wrecking ball.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:01 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #9.3   Kate

      They are not allowed in the UK due to them killing children that get hit by cars with them.
      Other than working on a farm there is no need for them.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #9.4   Splint Chesthair

      Come now, what’s a few dead children when priced against my personal satisfaction? Little snots shouldn’t be playing in the streets anyway.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 7:55 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

  • #10   NanLT

    It’s the THANKS at the end that I like.

    Just adds that little extra bit of something. Like frosting on a turd cake.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 8:52 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

  • #11   Soundchick bang

    Um, impeccable usually means great, or flawless, right? So, this gay man was really happy with the fat ass’ parking job? What’s with the hostility then? I’m emotionally torn.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 9:31 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #12   Sarah

    Bad parking invokes a rage inside of me too.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 9:42 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Bunnee

      But is it of an apocalyptic nature?

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:02 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #13   allison in houston

    The thing that gets me is that apparently all women have a husband (who can incidentally control all comings and goings by nature of being a husband). “If you are a woman” versus “If you are a married women”
    Honestly, “You park like a schmuck” would be plenty of comment–the rage-fest is something else again. (And the handwriting looks very girly to me, too).

    Sep 24, 2010 at 10:22 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #14   Edwina the Defrocked Nun

    This kind of venom really scares me. Someone is awfully close to the edge.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 10:34 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   Ed Depaine

      “Don’t push me cause I’m close to the edge. I’m trying not to lose my head. Ah huh ha huh!”

      Sep 24, 2010 at 10:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #14.2   park rose bang

      Olivia’s mother sang that song, but did it help her? No. It did not.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 12:11 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #15   Clevegal42

    The writer is obviously female and she’s pissed that someone else stole her bad parking thunder. Jealously is one of the main reasons we bust out the “fat inconsiderate ass” insult. I prefer “fat dumb ass”, but to each their own.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 10:42 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #16   Cady

    Whoa! Somebody get this note-writer a bowl of marijuana, stat!

    Sep 24, 2010 at 11:00 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   MAMARILLA2 bang

      Perhaps they should switch to decaf…with a twist of lemon -lime.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:49 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #17   aaa bang

    Hm, I’m giving this note a solid D. The insults contained within are so cliched and unoriginal that the note writer would’ve been better off going with a simple “LEARN TO PARK, ASSCLOWN” than attempting to be clever with this mess. I mean, insulting one’s weight/appearance, insulting the quality of their car, the whole “YOU’RE WHAT’S WRONG WITH AMERICA/THE WORLD” thing, and any sort of sexist/racist/religion-ist (By the way, is there an official word for that yet?)/whatever-the-fuck-generalizations-you-care-to-make-about-whatever-group have all been done to freaking death. I was disappointed by reading this note. Would I be a hypocrite in saying that recycling trite phrases in a pathetic attempt to be witty and insulting in an original manner is what’s wrong with America/the world? Note Writer, if you have two neurons to rub together, you can do better than this mess. Of course, that is assuming that you do have at least have two neurons to rub together. (OH SHIT, YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE? GODDAMN.) In any case, this scores an F for creativity.

    The total score is brought up by the handwriting, which I’m giving a B+. It’s pretty legible, although I’m sure the end of the first paragraph doesn’t say “It’s underdeveloped people like you that make the world wrzle for an apocalypse.” The note writer also seems to have forgotten to use a necessary comma and an apostrophe, and maybe a period (although it may be so small I just can’t see it).

    Sep 24, 2010 at 11:09 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Sirius¤ bang

      No, I think the note-writer obviously has a period, and not a small one.

      *runs to escape Kerry’s bare foot*

      Sep 24, 2010 at 11:44 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #17.2   Mo®

      I grade this down because no Nazis or Nazi like behaviour was referenced.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:34 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #17.3   Nack

      I like the fact that she’s insulting the appearance when she’s not even sure of the gender of the car owner. That makes it classic.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 3:48 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #17.4   anglophile bang

      I don’t have much to say about the note. I’m just concerned that the usually laconic aaa’s fingertips are bleeding after typing that whole long comment.

      Sep 25, 2010 at 8:50 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #17.5   aaa bang

      I produce novel-length comments when I am particularly inspired. Or when I can’t think of a decent haiku. I can’t say it happens too often, but I can whip them out when necessary.

      Sep 25, 2010 at 9:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #18   Elmo

    In my experience, the shitty park job is highly correlated with huge mother SUV with a turning radius measured in parsecs. The people who drive them often point them in the general direction of a parking space and seem satisfied when they’ve converted 90-degree parking into 45-degree angle parking.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 11:14 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

  • #19   Kellie

    This most certainly was a woman writing this note, and I dare to guess she knew the parker was a woman. She was so riled up by this because I bet someone has done the same thing to her before. She was so excited she forgot to write “time” after “next.” Hope she got all of her aggression out on that one. Her husband must love coming home to her.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 12:06 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   The Elf

      I dunno. Parking rage sex might be pretty good.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 12:57 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #20   claw71 bang

    The note is horribly scrawled and the petty rage contained therein leaves a lot to be desired. I would rule against the note writer save for the fact that Renee didn’t opt to include a picture of the parking job in question. This leads me to believe that it was an epic parking fail and Renee is lucky to get off with a pissy missive.

    You “guess” you’re a bad parker, Renee? I think we both know that you’re the Osama bin Laden of bad parkers.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 12:49 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Gladystopia

      Then we should expect twice-yearly videotaped missives to incite all bad-parking sympathizers, while also dispensing a touch of “Nyah nyah, you can’t catch me” screw-you-ification?

      Cool. Let me know where the Parking Jihad starts, and I’ll bring donuts.

      Sep 24, 2010 at 1:15 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   Mo®

      deerka deerka jihad deerka parking deerka!!!

      Sep 24, 2010 at 2:02 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   Woman on the Verge bang

      Claw just wants to park in her garage. Yes, that’s a euphemism.

      Sep 25, 2010 at 10:38 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #21   Odious

    I don’t get it.
    Next he gets out of his shit?
    His parking was impeccable?
    Is this note a compliment?
    Def p/a…and confusing

    Sep 24, 2010 at 1:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   butt

      “Impeccable” was sarcasm, obviously.

      Sep 25, 2010 at 3:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #22   liddy

    I think the bigger crime is the way this note is written. I have no clue what that first sentence says…….this definitely inspires grammer-rage in me.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 3:26 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #23   Nack

    This is a woman writing this note. I’m surprised that it’s even a question, what with the bubble letters. I’ve always thought of this as “rich bitch” lettering, no “average” person writes this way. (Smashed up angry, bubbly despite the rage displayed.) So…. this is an entitled bitch, who is angry that someone else behaves the way she feels only she should be allowed to do. That’s my psycho-logic to it, anyhow!

    And the best part is, you can revel in the fact you made her this mad, with your “fat ass” plunked right down in “her” parking spot. She’ll tell all her friends about it over a cup of Starbucks at the gym. It’ll be the topic of the day!

    Sep 24, 2010 at 3:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #24   TippingCows

    I have left notes for similar atrocities. But the parking has to be really bad. Like the pickup that parked in four (yes, four) parking spots in a supermarket parking lot or the little Honda that thought the lines meant “this is where you put your tires”. There is a site for this kind of thing. They even give you little print-out papers to keep in your car in case a situation like this arises.

    Sep 24, 2010 at 4:15 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   eslinger bang

      Thanks, TippingCows! Now I don’t have to take the time to write out a PAN, I can just leave one of the print-outs! :D

      Sep 25, 2010 at 10:25 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #25   Hank

    Even though I have never met Renee, nor do I know anything about her, I wholeheartedly agree with the letter writer.

    Renee is a horrible HORRIBLE person who deserves to burn in Hell and be posted on

    Sep 24, 2010 at 9:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #26   Sarah

    Its underdeveloped people like you that make the world wish for an apostrophe.

    Sep 25, 2010 at 6:02 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #27   Elorel

    I like how this is tagged under casual sexism. I don’t disagree that that’s what it is, but I like to imagine the labels for the other types of sexism.

    Overt? Direct? Aggressive sexism? Amateur, pro-am, and professional-level sexism? Is there a level below casual that’s kind of like half-assed sexism done by a stoner who can’t be bothered? Disengaged, unmotivated sexism?

    Sep 25, 2010 at 9:07 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #28   Woman on the Verge bang

    Parking confession: This week, when it was pouring rain, I actually considered stuffing a sweatshirt under my t-shirt so I could park in the expectant mother spot in front of the store.

    Sep 25, 2010 at 10:40 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   pony girl


      No sweatshirt needed. It says expectant. You could be 6 months pregnant, or 6 weeks.
      Or you could have a date that night and be expecting to get lucky.

      Sep 25, 2010 at 12:25 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

  • #29   Allthatglittas

    I can just see the notewriter flipping her perfectly highlighted and straightened hair as she signs off, before wiping away the foamy rage spittle with an immaculately manicured nail

    Sep 25, 2010 at 1:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #30   leona

    I’m honestly surprised at the level of offense in the comments toward the ~misogyny~. Usually people don’t seem to get offended here. I thought it was funny, especially in a “u mad” way, and I’m a woman. It’s clearly a woman who’s writing it too, even better…

    Sep 25, 2010 at 3:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   El Jefe

      Yes, leona, and not only that, but due to the average amount of US hyperbole (which if I’ve heard once I’ve heard a millions times) people are conflating chauvinism, sexism, and misogyny into one big Douche Sandwich.

      Guess what, folks? They’re not the same. Calling someone a dick is not misandry. Calling a particular theoretical woman a bad parker is not either. Saying she belongs in the house is chauvinist or sexist and PLUM FRIGGING TYPICAL for the anecdotes I’ve heard from Texas. The person who wrote the note (probably female) knows one of the easiest ways to push someone’s buttons is to say sexist shit. So what? It proves they might have overreacted, nothing more.

      Sep 26, 2010 at 9:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #31   Diary of a Young Black Asshole never know what people are going

    Sep 25, 2010 at 3:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #32   Godzilla

    Wow. Rage much?

    Sep 25, 2010 at 4:49 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #33   anya

    so, wait. impeccable meaning good? perfect? flawless?

    who’s the asshole now?

    Oct 1, 2010 at 3:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #34   Sarah

    Shame on his caretakers for letting him out on his own. He probably shat his diaper and had no one to clean him up.

    Nov 5, 2010 at 10:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up


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