“I guess I’m a bad parker,” says Renee in San Antonio — but really, how bad does a parking job have to be to inspire this kind of blind rage? Especially when the scene of the crime is the parking lot outside a big box store like Best Buy, not some precious residential block.
P.S. If you’re thinking “PMS bad,” next time I escape from the kitchen, I might have to give you a barefoot kick to the crotch.
![Dear Asshole, Next [time?] you get your fat inconsiderate ass out of your piece of shit, take a look at the impeccable parking job. Its [sic] underdeveloped people like you that make the rest of the world wish for an apocolypse [sic]. thanks!! PS If you are a woman shame on your husband for allowing you to leave the house](http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4128/5019000443_81fd70558f.jpg)
related: When parking gets political
84 responses so far ↓
#1
thrall
Is it just me, or is this really girly handwriting?
Sep 24, 2010 at 7:56 am rating: 90
#2
MAMARILLA2
Underdeveloped yet Fat assed, Male yet female, impeccable yet sloppy parking..Inconsiderate and apocalyptical…the Whole Package.
Sep 24, 2010 at 7:59 am rating: 90
#3
driver
I’m on team note writer here. People don’t leave notes like this when you are a little crooked, you must have really parked horribly. If you did and you are too lazy to fix it you deserve said note!
Sep 24, 2010 at 7:59 am rating: 90
#4
Lee
In the interests of a fair and balanced report, you really should have taken a photo of your parking so we can tell if this is unreasonable or not.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:01 am rating: 90
#5
cali
I hope you are a woman because they are the ones I like to bash the most. If you were a man I would have to accuse you of being a stupid immigrant, which isn’t quite as much fun, but close.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:12 am rating: 90
#6
the Librarian
I thought it was starting with an instruction to get out of the car. “Next, you get your fat, inconsiderate ass out of your piece of shit…” I was so confused. Why would she be writing this note with the driver still sitting in the car. Then it dawned on me.
The missing word in the first sentence, the missing apostrophe in “it’s,” and is that a period after “its”? All of these things put me firmly in the corner of the bad parker. No matter how poor the parking job, this writing is worse.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:24 am rating: 90
#7
J
Team Note-Writer. I’ve had to climb in the rear passenger side to get to the driver’s seat too many times. It’s enough to make me wish I hated my car enough to scrape the side of the bad parker’s car. People who are too stupid to park inside the lines and too entitled to fix it deserve to hear about it. I’d leave my number though cause I’d love to have them call at me so I can yell directly at them.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:40 am rating: 90
#8
Gunderson
“Underdeveloped”? Is that like an A- cup size?
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:42 am rating: 90
#9
Splint Chesthair
I had someone park crooked next to me where their front bumper basically touched behind my front bumper making it impossible for me to backup without hitting their bumper. There was a car in the parking space in front so I couldn’t pull through either. Luckily, my bumper is an all metal cow-catcher or roo-bar so it won’t bend and I just backed up and cracked the other bumper in the process. But if I had a regular car and it was expensive, I’d be stuck there.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:44 am rating: 90
#10
NanLT
It’s the THANKS at the end that I like.
Just adds that little extra bit of something. Like frosting on a turd cake.
Sep 24, 2010 at 8:52 am rating: 90
#11
Soundchick
Um, impeccable usually means great, or flawless, right? So, this gay man was really happy with the fat ass’ parking job? What’s with the hostility then? I’m emotionally torn.
Sep 24, 2010 at 9:31 am rating: 90
#12
Sarah
Bad parking invokes a rage inside of me too.
Sep 24, 2010 at 9:42 am rating: 90
#13
allison in houston
The thing that gets me is that apparently all women have a husband (who can incidentally control all comings and goings by nature of being a husband). “If you are a woman” versus “If you are a married women”
Honestly, “You park like a schmuck” would be plenty of comment–the rage-fest is something else again. (And the handwriting looks very girly to me, too).
Sep 24, 2010 at 10:22 am rating: 90
#14
Edwina the Defrocked Nun
This kind of venom really scares me. Someone is awfully close to the edge.
Sep 24, 2010 at 10:34 am rating: 90
#15
Clevegal42
The writer is obviously female and she’s pissed that someone else stole her bad parking thunder. Jealously is one of the main reasons we bust out the “fat inconsiderate ass” insult. I prefer “fat dumb ass”, but to each their own.
Sep 24, 2010 at 10:42 am rating: 90
#16
Cady
Whoa! Somebody get this note-writer a bowl of marijuana, stat!
Sep 24, 2010 at 11:00 am rating: 90
#17
aaa
Hm, I’m giving this note a solid D. The insults contained within are so cliched and unoriginal that the note writer would’ve been better off going with a simple “LEARN TO PARK, ASSCLOWN” than attempting to be clever with this mess. I mean, insulting one’s weight/appearance, insulting the quality of their car, the whole “YOU’RE WHAT’S WRONG WITH AMERICA/THE WORLD” thing, and any sort of sexist/racist/religion-ist (By the way, is there an official word for that yet?)/whatever-the-fuck-generalizations-you-care-to-make-about-whatever-group have all been done to freaking death. I was disappointed by reading this note. Would I be a hypocrite in saying that recycling trite phrases in a pathetic attempt to be witty and insulting in an original manner is what’s wrong with America/the world? Note Writer, if you have two neurons to rub together, you can do better than this mess. Of course, that is assuming that you do have at least have two neurons to rub together. (OH SHIT, YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE? GODDAMN.) In any case, this scores an F for creativity.
The total score is brought up by the handwriting, which I’m giving a B+. It’s pretty legible, although I’m sure the end of the first paragraph doesn’t say “It’s underdeveloped people like you that make the world wrzle for an apocalypse.” The note writer also seems to have forgotten to use a necessary comma and an apostrophe, and maybe a period (although it may be so small I just can’t see it).
Sep 24, 2010 at 11:09 am rating: 90
#18
Elmo
In my experience, the shitty park job is highly correlated with huge mother SUV with a turning radius measured in parsecs. The people who drive them often point them in the general direction of a parking space and seem satisfied when they’ve converted 90-degree parking into 45-degree angle parking.
Sep 24, 2010 at 11:14 am rating: 90
#19
Kellie
This most certainly was a woman writing this note, and I dare to guess she knew the parker was a woman. She was so riled up by this because I bet someone has done the same thing to her before. She was so excited she forgot to write “time” after “next.” Hope she got all of her aggression out on that one. Her husband must love coming home to her.
Sep 24, 2010 at 12:06 pm rating: 90
#20
claw71
The note is horribly scrawled and the petty rage contained therein leaves a lot to be desired. I would rule against the note writer save for the fact that Renee didn’t opt to include a picture of the parking job in question. This leads me to believe that it was an epic parking fail and Renee is lucky to get off with a pissy missive.
You “guess” you’re a bad parker, Renee? I think we both know that you’re the Osama bin Laden of bad parkers.
Sep 24, 2010 at 12:49 pm rating: 90
#21
Odious
I don’t get it.
Next he gets out of his shit?
His parking was impeccable?
Is this note a compliment?
Def p/a…and confusing
Sep 24, 2010 at 1:16 pm rating: 90
#22
liddy
I think the bigger crime is the way this note is written. I have no clue what that first sentence says…….this definitely inspires grammer-rage in me.
Sep 24, 2010 at 3:26 pm rating: 90
#23
Nack
This is a woman writing this note. I’m surprised that it’s even a question, what with the bubble letters. I’ve always thought of this as “rich bitch” lettering, no “average” person writes this way. (Smashed up angry, bubbly despite the rage displayed.) So…. this is an entitled bitch, who is angry that someone else behaves the way she feels only she should be allowed to do. That’s my psycho-logic to it, anyhow!
And the best part is, you can revel in the fact you made her this mad, with your “fat ass” plunked right down in “her” parking spot. She’ll tell all her friends about it over a cup of Starbucks at the gym. It’ll be the topic of the day!
Sep 24, 2010 at 3:44 pm rating: 90
#24
TippingCows
I have left notes for similar atrocities. But the parking has to be really bad. Like the pickup that parked in four (yes, four) parking spots in a supermarket parking lot or the little Honda that thought the lines meant “this is where you put your tires”. There is a site for this kind of thing. They even give you little print-out papers to keep in your car in case a situation like this arises.
http://www.youparklikeanasshole.com/
Sep 24, 2010 at 4:15 pm rating: 90
#25
Hank
Even though I have never met Renee, nor do I know anything about her, I wholeheartedly agree with the letter writer.
Renee is a horrible HORRIBLE person who deserves to burn in Hell and be posted on http://badparking.wordpress.com/
Sep 24, 2010 at 9:26 pm rating: 90
#26
Sarah
Its underdeveloped people like you that make the world wish for an apostrophe.
Sep 25, 2010 at 6:02 am rating: 90
#27
Elorel
I like how this is tagged under casual sexism. I don’t disagree that that’s what it is, but I like to imagine the labels for the other types of sexism.
Overt? Direct? Aggressive sexism? Amateur, pro-am, and professional-level sexism? Is there a level below casual that’s kind of like half-assed sexism done by a stoner who can’t be bothered? Disengaged, unmotivated sexism?
Sep 25, 2010 at 9:07 am rating: 90
#28
Woman on the Verge
Parking confession: This week, when it was pouring rain, I actually considered stuffing a sweatshirt under my t-shirt so I could park in the expectant mother spot in front of the store.
Sep 25, 2010 at 10:40 am rating: 90
#29
Allthatglittas
I can just see the notewriter flipping her perfectly highlighted and straightened hair as she signs off, before wiping away the foamy rage spittle with an immaculately manicured nail
Sep 25, 2010 at 1:54 pm rating: 90
#30
leona
I’m honestly surprised at the level of offense in the comments toward the ~misogyny~. Usually people don’t seem to get offended here. I thought it was funny, especially in a “u mad” way, and I’m a woman. It’s clearly a woman who’s writing it too, even better…
Sep 25, 2010 at 3:27 pm rating: 90
#31
Diary of a Young Black Asshole
wow..you never know what people are going through..lol
Sep 25, 2010 at 3:55 pm rating: 90
#32
Godzilla
Wow. Rage much?
Sep 25, 2010 at 4:49 pm rating: 90
#33
anya
so, wait. impeccable meaning good? perfect? flawless?
who’s the asshole now?
Oct 1, 2010 at 3:32 pm rating: 90
#34
Sarah
Shame on his caretakers for letting him out on his own. He probably shat his diaper and had no one to clean him up.
Nov 5, 2010 at 10:08 pm rating: 90
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