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The town recommends you hold it.

September 29th, 2010 · 77 comments

Why this sign isn’t pictured in the  I heart New York Tourist guide to Shelter Island, I have no idea.

Please be advised that the town of SI is not Restroom friendly - the town Recommends you hold it until you find A more friendly municipality like Greenport or Sag Harbor.

(Thanks to Laurie’s Aunt Sylvia for snapping the picture!)

related: How’s that for a low price guarantee?

FILED UNDER: bar · Long Island · New York · toilet · tourists

77 responses so far ↓

  • #1   partypooper

    you don’t have to be so pissy about it!

    Sep 29, 2010 at 8:20 pm   rating: 37  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Scribbles the Monkey bang

      Ya really don’t want to piss off someone who’s really got to go.

      Oct 1, 2010 at 3:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #2   dbm

    Suddenly I feel Firsty.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 8:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      That’s just stupid.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 7:11 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Jenny

      Especially when you’re not first.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 8:13 am   rating: 26  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   Maas

      Feeling first is the next best thing to being first.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 2:24 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #3   MinnKB

    So you thought you were drinkin’ a warmish Heineken? Think again.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 8:39 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Elli

      Yeah, it might be a tepid Stella Artois!

      Sep 29, 2010 at 8:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Mo®

      They both come from the same “tap”.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 9:20 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #4   oracle

    what hidden secrets must SI hold to be worth the acceptance of unfriendly restrooms?

    Sep 29, 2010 at 8:45 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Ndawg

      Maybe it’s like East Egg or West Egg, ol’ sport.

      Sep 29, 2010 at 10:20 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #5   Snippy

    Wait a second, is this reallythe the town of SI” or are you talking about that Ben Affleck movie?

    Sep 29, 2010 at 9:02 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #6   FeRD bang

    This becomes all the more “amusing” (read: dickish) once you find out that, unlike many such locations where the “island” designation is more of an abstract concept, Shelter Island actually is an island. (It’s a small land mass situated between the two “forks” at the eastern end of Long Island. In what I’d call a bay, but somehow is considered like 10 different bays.)

    So, if you find yourself needing a restroom and decide to pop over to neighboring, pee-friendly Greenpoint or Sag Harbor, you’d better hope you’ve timed it right to catch a ferry crossing!

    Personally, I’d be more inclined to tear down that sign, pop around behind Bitchy’s Bar (pictured in the photo above – at least, I assume that’s the name of the establishment) to leave them a small token of my esteem, and then use their “suggestion” to wipe my ass.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 9:04 pm   rating: 32  small thumbs up

  • #7   Kim

    For those who are not familiar, you can only get to Sag Harbor or Greenport from SI via a ferry.

    I get that summer tourists can be a pain in the ass to locals. Maybe all the tourists should just NOT GO to Shelter Island in the first place. Maybe then the proprietors of this establishment will be happy.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 9:04 pm   rating: 45  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   FeRD bang

      D’oh! Greenport, right. Why do I always think “Greenpoint”? (Probably because that’s how it’s shaped.)

      Sep 29, 2010 at 9:16 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   Maas

      If you think that’s tough on the tourists, imagine what it’s like to LIVE in a town without restrooms…

      Sep 29, 2010 at 9:26 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

    • #7.3   Kim

      tomatoe, tomahto I knew what you meant.

      My guess is that this is a “local” bar. Some locals on Shelter Island have a tendency to be a bit insular. But this note is just plain rude and obnoxious. Why not post “Restrooms for Customers Only” and then enforce their rule firmly but politely? They own the place, if they don’t want riff-raff in there using the bathrooms that is their decision but they don’t need to insult potential/exisiting customers to achieve that goal.

      Sep 29, 2010 at 9:30 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #7.4   Kim

      Maas – I am pretty confident this place would have no issue with a local using the restroom, even if they didn’t buy a beer.

      Sep 29, 2010 at 9:32 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #7.5   Helen

      See, now I would have read this and decided that they don’t offer a clean restroom, and not gone in that bar and gone elsewhere to drink.

      If I go to ANY restaurant or pub in need of a restroom, I make sure to at least order a drink when I am done (thereby technically being a customer).

      Sep 30, 2010 at 11:19 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #8   se

    In SI, restrooms shit on you.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 9:05 pm   rating: 29  small thumbs up

  • #9   DixieKGirl bang

    How can you serve beer and NOT have a public restroom?

    Sep 29, 2010 at 9:13 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Maas

      Maybe it comes in a bottle.

      Sep 29, 2010 at 9:26 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #9.2   Lurker

      Perhaps they also sell Stadium Pals?

      Sep 30, 2010 at 1:29 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #9.3   orinoco womble

      How can you serve or sell food and not be required by law to provide restroom facilities? As far as I know it’s the law. You got problems with people coming in just to use the toilet, make them ask for the key.
      You got problems with people in general–don’t run a business.

      Oct 2, 2010 at 6:27 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

  • #10   Madrias

    Fine, I’ll shit on your sidewalk as my passive-aggressive statement.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 10:19 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #11   Anonymous

    I actually work across the street from that place. It’s called The Dory. It’s actually really irritating because people come in and ask us to use our bathroom all day as well (lots of foreign tourists straight off the ferry). We don’t have a sign up because my boss feels it’s rude, so I have to tell people all day that there’s no bathroom.

    There are public restrooms at a gas station next door and at both of the ferry terminals on the island.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 10:48 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   FeRD bang

      “The Dory”? What does that mean? Sounds like it was named after the Andrea Doria or something. (Which would be exactly the right amount of tasteless, to go with the pee sign.) *shudder*

      Sep 29, 2010 at 10:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #11.2   someone

      you could just look it up.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 4:18 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #11.3   FeRD bang

      I did, but sometimes this lazyweb search engine is really slow to return results.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 9:05 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #11.4   Mo®

      Well you can apparently flaunt state liquor laws and enjoy a few cold ones on the deck over the water with the harelegger locals at the Dory. Try the burgers they are world famous apparently.
      Try reading the front page of their website too. Maybe I am just mush-headed but it made my brain wince.
      Click my name it will take you to them FeRD.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 12:14 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #11.5   anglophile

      Well, first I had to download QuickTime to watch their stupid introductory “video” which featured entirely unremarkable still photos on a slow zoom interspersed with poorly-lit, Blair-Witch-Project-shaky video. The intro goes on and on, but I watched until the very end, where I saw a photo that showed what appeared to be the only pool table in the bar with some sort of floral arrangement on it. After that I was not surprised by the quality of the rest of the website. Or by the p/a note.

      p.s. Cupcake Burgers? Blerg.

      Oct 1, 2010 at 11:36 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #11.6   orinoco womble

      I quote from The Dory’s website: “Kiffer fondly remembers the good old days when owner/bartender Eddie Langbine would pass out from the hours of drink and sleep right on the floor while the customers would go behind the bar, make their own drinks and put the money into the cash register. “It was the honor system back then,” he recalled.

      “Fondly remembers”. Yeah, that the bartender drank at work and passed out…what a hoot.

      Oct 2, 2010 at 6:47 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #11.7   clumber

      Extra thumbs to the brave PA-ers who took it for the team and investigated their website so I don’t have to.

      Oct 3, 2010 at 5:15 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #12   Ellski

    My work has a staff only toilet, and a customer once screamed at me that it’s a violation of her human rights to not let her use the toilet! Um, I’m pretty sure it’s not a human right to use a private toilet!

    Sep 29, 2010 at 10:55 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   VerityBrown bang

      Not exactly a “human right.” But when someone is having a genuine toileting emergency, it is certainly “humane” to allow them to use your “private” toilet. I remember reading about a JoAnn Fabrics that refused to allow a desperate customer to use their “staff” toilet; she ended up having diarrhea down her leg and onto the store’s sales floor before she could get out of the store to seek another restroom. Really *excellent* decision by the butthead manager…NOT.

      Sep 29, 2010 at 11:15 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   H for Toy bang

      I heard somewhere (I don’t know if it’s true or not) that it’s illegal to refuse a restroom to a pregnant woman or any child under the age of 5. I think it’s just common sense.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 8:35 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   FeRD bang

      Speaking of common sense, that doesn’t even pass a cursory sniff test for legality. …For one thing, the ACLU would have a field day, if we’re talking about a law somewhere in the US.

      (Only pregnant women and children under 5? Can the business owners demand a birth certificate or stick-pee, to verify eligibility?)

      Sep 30, 2010 at 9:17 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   Kate

      I worked in a store where the toilet was also where we would hang our bags and coats.
      We wouldn’t let customers use it because all our personal belongings were in there.

      BTW the store was way too small for lockers etc.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 2:40 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.5   Amanda

      @ FeRD — I would totally say I was pregnant, take the pee-stick test to verify, then..
      Manager: It’s negative! You lied, you aren’t pregnant, so you can’t pee in our restr… oh… *looks from wet pee stick up to where I’ve already run off yelling “Gotcha, sucker!”*

      Sep 30, 2010 at 3:17 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #12.6   Rachael

      The pregnant & child under the age of 5 law that H for Toy mentioned is in England… and it also extends to persons with disabilities… not so sure about the USA though.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 8:40 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #13   VerityBrown bang

    I was going to guess that this sign was a kind of PA protest of the town’s lack of public restrooms (which leads to people asking to use theirs). But I see in an earlier (presumably knowledgeable) comment that the town does, in fact, have designated public restrooms. In which case, it would make more sense to put up a sign that tells where those restrooms are located, rather than just being snotty at potential customers.

    Sep 29, 2010 at 11:08 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

  • #14   Woman on the Verge bang

    So, this town is restroom-hostile? What will they do to you if you try to pee? Maybe this is a warning, like an X-Files episode… I bet there’s some horrible beast in the sewer that is attracted to urine so when you unsuspectingly go into the stall… CHOMP.

    Or not.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 7:14 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #15   The Elf

    Good think I’m not opposed to peeing behind handy nearby trees. Or buildings. I’m not picky. When you gotta go, you gotta go.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 8:04 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #16   a*p

    That sign just encourages public urination. Why not point out where the public bathrooms are? How far away is the ferry station? Does this mean even customers can’t use the bathroom? Gah.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 8:12 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

  • #17   People are funny

    So they fill you up with beer and won’t let you use the bathroom? Rude.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 8:44 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #18   havingfitz

    I’m going to kind of play devil’s advocate here. I agree the sign is nasty for no reason. But I work in an office building with limited restroom space. There are no shops or stores in the building: strictly offices. People wander in off the streets all the time to use our facilities: when you only get a short break it’s irritating to spend most of it waiting to use the bathroom, especially when it’s being tied up by people who don’t even belong in the building.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 8:57 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   The Elf

      That’s more understandable in an office environment. A place that serves food and drink is different. Retail establishments bridge the gap; it depends on the establishment. The print shop I worked for did not have a public restroom, but I wouldn’t expect anyone to want to use it either. You had to walk past loud, smelly, working printing presses to get to it.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 9:00 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

  • #19   Woman on the Verge bang

    For goodness sakes it’s an island. Go pee in the water. Pretty sure once you get started, someone will offer you a restroom… even if it’s at the police station.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 9:24 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

  • #20   aaa bang

    Well who the fuck pees in a toilet, anyway? Cool kids pee as they go. If they’re those high class, persnickety types, they may find a corner to pee in.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:00 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Gladystopia

      You know, I always THOUGHT those cool kids smelled funny….

      Sep 30, 2010 at 11:33 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   fan bang

      That’s why the cool kids all run in herds, no one knows who to blame for the stench. Of course, no one wants to mention the smell, you just might get booted from the cool kids club.

      I’ve held little to no respect for the ones that think they are a part of the cool kids. Really, it is true, they do stink. Part of the problem is, their attitude that they think their shit doesn’t stink!

      Sep 30, 2010 at 1:06 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   Mo®

      I thought I noted a faint goat like odor with a piquant, nutty aftertaste.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 1:32 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #21   Elmo

    They want to sell me beer and then won’t let me pee? That’s cruel. The only thing worse would be pushing iced tea to someone taking blood pressure meds.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:36 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #22   berge bang

    Nothing says “Buy a beer from us” like a sign telling you to hold it.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:39 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

  • #23   Woman on the Verge bang

    I finally figured it out. This is a bar and medical supply store combo. Half-price catheters with every pitcher of beer.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:56 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #24   GhostWriter bang

    Why shamrocks around Heineken? It’s a Dutch beer.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:57 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   Woman on the Verge bang

      Those aren’t shamrocks. It’s urine spatter.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 12:07 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #24.2   Mo®

      :lol: I ♥ you Wo!
      Bladder splatter! Ewwwww

      Sep 30, 2010 at 12:17 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #24.3   Woman on the Verge bang

      Thanks, Mo®. I ♥ you too!

      Sep 30, 2010 at 12:32 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #24.4   The Elf

      But…. why is it green? On second thought, I don’t want to know.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 12:54 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #24.5   Woman on the Verge bang

      Urinary tract infections can be VERY nasty. You see what comes out after they make you hold it for a week until the next ferry comes.

      Sep 30, 2010 at 1:11 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #24.6   GhostWriter bang

      WotV is right-
      One time I held it for three days, and then out came a shamrock!

      Sep 30, 2010 at 4:32 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #24.7   The Elf

      I guess that also explains the red urine splatter mark there too?

      Oct 1, 2010 at 6:51 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #24.8   Woman on the Verge bang

      That’s the blood of those who really just couldn’t hold it and beat the bartender to death before peeing in the whiskey bottle.

      Oct 1, 2010 at 9:57 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #25   fan bang

    The problem I have with notes of this nature is, as soon as I see one I have to pee really, really bad… the power of suggestion, maybe?

    Sep 30, 2010 at 1:09 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #26   Anonymous

    I think the message is addressed to people who wander in and want to use the restroom—the bar does have a bathroom for patron use. And a dory is a type of fish.

    Btw I’m totally not defending them—the sign is really rude and the food there is horrible.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 4:45 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Mo® bang

      A “Dory” is a type of fish and a greek spear. It is also a small, shallow-draft boat, about 5 to 7 metres/16.4 to 23.0 feet long. In this case it refers to the boat which is mounted to the roof of the establishment in question.

      Oct 5, 2010 at 11:12 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #27   Anonymous

    ….And they also have another printed sign on the sidewalk that says NO public restrooms, which is out there every day as well. A little overkill, no?

    Sep 30, 2010 at 4:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #28   Mike Oxlong

    I just went behind the building :D

    Sep 30, 2010 at 8:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #29   Canthz_B bang

    Simple solution…walk in, sit down, order something time consuming to prepare, ask where the restroom is, use restroom, politely cancel order, leave.

    Sep 30, 2010 at 9:39 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   se

      can only give you one thumbs up.. deserves more

      Oct 1, 2010 at 9:14 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #30   havingfitz

    Ain’t it sad what a town without potty can do?

    Sep 30, 2010 at 11:45 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #31   Neeners

    I was at the town hall meeting the day the WHOLE town voted on outsiders holding it. A motion was brought forward and it was unanimous….. they also voted to not be a friendly municipality as stated.

    Oct 1, 2010 at 11:03 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   orinoco womble

      The mainland should build a concrete barrier around the island then, so the islanders aren’t “bothered” by little things like supplies of food and beer…then they can be as unfriendly as they like on their own side of the wall.

      Oct 3, 2010 at 1:48 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #32   mo

    I had a small business in a town that spent millions on renovating the streetscape to be a quaint faux-Victorian town, but omitted public restrooms.
    As a business owner, I know what it’s like to want to post that sign to the tourists who don’t understand why they can’t pee.

    Oct 5, 2010 at 10:26 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   Mo® bang

      Hi! I am Mo® too!~

      Oct 5, 2010 at 11:13 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #33   La La Land bang

    Perhaps they like it when tourists walk around back to relieve themselves?

    Oct 28, 2010 at 5:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up


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