Did you want a doggy bag for those leftovers, sir?

November 8th, 2010 · 72 comments

Our submitter says this isn’t the first time her father has put up this display in his front yard…proving, I guess that some people will go through a lot of shit just to make a point. (Meanwhile, the neighborhood dogs and dog owners continue to go about their business.)

Thank you for leaving this for me. I really don't need it. Feel free to take it home for your own use.

related: Lost & Found

FILED UNDER: Chicago · dogs · shit · thanks (but not really)


72 responses so far ↓

  • #1   harmonicpies

    If he really wanted to be helpful, he would have packaged it in a paper bag and provided some matches.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 9:48 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   pony girl

    I am SO doing this!
    How could I not have thought of this?

    Nov 8, 2010 at 9:48 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Worker 11811

      What you should really do is run it over with the lawn mower. But, first, make sure the offending dog & owner are “downwind.”

      They’ll never come within 50 feet of your yard again! At least, not while you are mowing the lawn! WEG!

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:12 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   Donna Martin Graduates!

      I keep hoping the weekly gardener will run over & distribute the feral cat poop that occassionally adorns my lawn, but I believe it sits lower than the mower blades & thus eludes dispersion.

      Those wily gardeners!

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:46 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Resident Grammarian esq bang

    I can imagine him painstakingly putting it into the ziplock bag, muttering to himself – “this will show them!”

    And did he write on the bag itself before realizing that no one could read it? I really want to know what’s written on that bag now.

    The pink ribbon is a nice – if random – touch. Does it serve a purpose?

    Nov 8, 2010 at 9:49 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   goose

      I guess the ribbon is what the note is referring to, the dog poo is just there for decoration.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 9:58 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Sed bang

      It’s breast cancer awareness – the dog who left that pile behind had the Runs For The Cure.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:06 pm   rating: 54  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Melodie

      Bag Your Neighbour’s Dog’s Feces For the Cure.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   Canthz_B bang

      The ribbon could be there as a windsock…just in case the baggie opens, you’d probably want to be upwind of it.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:41 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Alibubali

    Safety first! Someone might poke an eye out on that stick if it didn’t have a warning ribbon.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 9:56 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   FeRD bang

      Ah, yes — bright, neon pink, the universal color signifying “YOU BAD POINTY!!”

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:13 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Mark bang

      Pointed stick? Oh, oh, oh. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Fresh fruit not good enough for you eh? Well I’ll tell you something my lad. When you’re walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don’t come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit…

      Nov 9, 2010 at 9:57 am   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Kay

    We have our own fertilizer, but thank you for the neighbourly gesture.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:09 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   Maggie

    Is anyone else bothered by the use of Comic Sans?

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:10 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   FeRD bang

      Bothered? In context, I adore it!

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:14 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.2   The Elf

      Yes, THIS is the proper time and place Comic Sans. It’s a shitty font for a shitty topic.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:29 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
    • #6.3   Donna Martin Graduates!

      indeed.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Jynical

    Clearly someone hasn’t discovered that a cross-bow is much more effective in getting your “Pick up after your dog, please.” point across. Maybe he could find a better use for that stake? The ribbon is a little large for a garrote though…

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:10 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   Gretchen

    Any bets on whether the owner (or rather, the owner’s owner) will claim it? Nah, didn’t think so.

    I do sympathize with Dad, though….picking up poo is part of owning a dog. Don’t want to do it, don’t get one. Or, I suppose, buy a huge plot of land to allow your dog to run free and take a crap wherever he/she chooses on your own property.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:10 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Canthz_B bang

    Please, God…tell me he printed the sign then went out and collected the poop.
    I can’t bear the thought of that baggie on the computer desk in his den.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:11 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   FeRD bang

      Then you really don’t want to imagine his kitchen counter, when he went inside for the baggie!

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:16 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Mo® bang

      Pumpkin bread anyone?

      Nov 9, 2010 at 12:23 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Manzini

    I’d leave a human poop right on the dog owner’s yard. And by “leave” I mean I would produce it from my anus and deposit it immediately onto the lawn. None of this bagging it up for later. Not unless throwing the feces might be in order…

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:17 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   FeRD bang

      Yeah, that’s nice and all, but you really wouldn’t.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:18 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   Canthz_B bang

      Don’t do drugs.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 10:23 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Donna Martin Graduates!

      … America says “no” to drugs.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:49 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Canthz_B bang

    I always suspected Ziploc™ bags had a thousand and one uses. Now I know there’s a one thousand and second that makes me Glad® I’m only up to number twelve.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:30 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   The Gecko Hunter

      Apparently Dad is only up to #2.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 3:56 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   Canthz_B bang

    This is the shittiest exhibit I’ve ever seen on display. I mean, what kinda crap is this anyway?
    I suppose this guy thinks it’s turdtastic, but I feel deep in my bowels a movement is beginning!
    He could have just said “Scat!”, but no, he had to squat, flushed with anger, and collect it.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 10:37 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Madrias

      Some of those puns smell a bit…

      Nov 12, 2010 at 1:44 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   Canthz_B bang

      I know, but I had nothing else to doo at the time. ;-)

      Nov 13, 2010 at 10:34 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   bowzer

    dumb guy, dogs can’t read.

    Nov 8, 2010 at 11:20 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Fal

    I know some people are serious composting proponents, but this is ridiculous!

    Nov 8, 2010 at 11:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Kim

    Can anyone tell for sure but the baggie looks like it has writing on it. What does it say?

    Nov 8, 2010 at 11:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   pony girl

      Looks like – found in the center of my yard or lawn.

      Nov 8, 2010 at 11:27 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.2   Tavana

      There is something delicious about using a dark brown texter to write on a bag filled with shit.

      Sadly, the message had more mystery and appeal before you pointed out what it most likely says.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 3:03 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.3   Donna Martin Graduates!

      …fucking delicious?!

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #15.4   Mike

      WOTV in 3… 2…

      Nov 10, 2010 at 1:17 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   Odious

    Wait; looks like half the story is on the baggie. What does it say? It can’t be half as good as the version running through my mind. (Particularly because I’m convinced one of the words is “centaur”).

    Nov 8, 2010 at 11:48 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Canthz_B bang

      Dog poop is bad enough, but if your neighbor can’t be bothered to pick up after his centaur it can seriously affect property values.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 6:02 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Gunderson

    I usually take a dump on the hood of an offending dog walker’s car. Then when they start yelling at me, I tell them “It’s ok, im going to scoop it up when I’m done!”

    Nov 9, 2010 at 6:51 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   G

    It’s one of those bags isn’t it?; the type that decomposes when its held.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 7:16 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   bored@work

    If the guy really wanted to make a point, he would take that bag down and stick it under the doormat of the dog owner. What an awesome squishy mess for his porch.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 7:31 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   scaarykitty

      I did something similar once. A neighbour was terrible for letting their dog poop up and down the street and leaving it to get trodden in. Scooped up a particularly moist-looking one, posted it through the letter box with a note pointing out that since she thought it was ok for me to have it walked into my carpet – where my baby would crawl about – then clearly she wouldn’t mind it on hers.

      She started scooping after that, at least whenever I saw her. One down, 15,000 to go…

      Nov 9, 2010 at 3:14 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   Donna Martin Graduates!

      Brilliant!! AND it apparently worked!

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   Janellionaire

      I caught my neighbor in a similar act once. The people next door to me had a small dog that they let run loose all day. Apparently the woman at the end of the street had had enough of “Baby” crapping on her lawn, because she came down the block one day with a pile from her own golden retriever on a paper plate. She saw me watching and explained that she was just “returning the favor.”

      Nov 11, 2010 at 11:31 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   *snerk*

    What makes you all think he knows who the dog owner is? If he’d seen the crime in progress, he would have said something then.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 9:15 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Donna Martin Graduates!

      Exactly! I once watched the next door neighbor’s dog come over to my lawn and do a crap (only time he ever did it, tho) and when I pointed it out to my neighbor (who I humored & tolerated but secretly loathed) she DENIED it, saying it didn’t look like her dog’s crap at all. But she did collect it right there and then.

      I am always flabbergasted when I do confront someone about something and they flat out lie about it.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:54 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   Mike

      We had a neighbor who brought over a bag of crap, accusing my parents of not picking up after our dog. Of course the logs were considerably larger than anything our dog had ever produced, but she was convinced it was ours.

      Nov 10, 2010 at 1:21 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   Jay

    Woudn’t it have been easier to set up a camera to catch the crime in the act? Then he could take the poop and leave it on their doorstep.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 9:38 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   Donna Martin Graduates!

      Easier? How easy is it to purchase or rent a security camera, hook it up, set it for time-lapse photography and then record the footage? Hmmnnn?

      Still, if I had a recurring issue such as this, I just might consider it.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Allie

    It’s kind of like cutting off your nose to spite your face, isn’t it? I mean, the offending dog owners probably just think it’s funny, if they think of it at all. I’m guessing, given that they don’t clean it up in the first place, that they just don’t give a crap (if you’ll excuse the expression).

    Nov 9, 2010 at 10:17 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   berge bang

    Love the pink flagging. Its seems to say, “Come look at my bag of poop! Just in case you didn’t see the big sign and bag of poop.”

    Nov 9, 2010 at 10:53 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   Captain Calypso

    If I saw this, I would be really tempted to take the baggie and leave it in his mailbox. Bonus if he has one of those openings that you slide a letter through.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 11:18 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   Donna Martin Graduates!

      Is that because you are a complete jerk?

      TEAM anti-poop!

      Nov 9, 2010 at 7:57 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.2   Donna Martin Graduates!

      oh — you meant the offender’s mailbox. I take back the ‘jerk’ comment and amend it to ‘stupid’ bc it’s pretty obvious the sign maker doesn’t actually know who is responsible for the poop.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 8:01 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.3   Captain Calypso

      Uh, what?
      I meant that I would put the baggie in the mailbox of the guy who put up the sign.
      As a prank. Because it would be funny. And I said TEMPTED. Not that I’d actually do it. Just that it’s a funny thought to do to someone who is uptight about poop.

      Nov 10, 2010 at 8:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.4   Canthz_B bang

      Quit while you’re ahead…Oops, too late! :-P

      Nov 11, 2010 at 1:17 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Woman on the Verge bang

    What kind of dog poops that massively huge amount in one poop? That’s from a horse.

    Nov 9, 2010 at 12:52 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   The Elf

      His name is Marmaduke. He eats people. You didn’t hear this from me.

      Nov 9, 2010 at 1:28 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.2   Canthz_B bang

      My Lab-Golden mix is more than capable of dropping a load that size. We don’t all own lapdogs. ;-)

      Nov 9, 2010 at 5:02 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.3   FeRD bang

      Sure you do. You just don’t all have the lap to handle such a dog. :)

      Nov 10, 2010 at 10:07 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.4   Canthz_B bang

      And here they almost had me believing that all Americans have overly large laps easily able to accommodate a St. Bernard! :-P

      Nov 10, 2010 at 10:37 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.5   InYourSleep

      Or a centaur.

      Nov 11, 2010 at 12:21 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.6   FeRD bang

      Hey, hey, hey! There’s no need to bring our sex lives into this.

      Nov 11, 2010 at 3:50 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #25.7   Kimmypie

      I have a 95 lb American Bulldog who drops loads that a small pony would be proud of!
      Only she drops them in my yard, not in anyone else’s :)

      Nov 14, 2010 at 7:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   People Person

    Don’t get mad, get a DNA test.

    http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/dna-testing-dogs-poop-sniff-negligent-condo-owners/story?id=10689585

    Nov 9, 2010 at 1:39 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   AnneJuliet

    i’m proud to call him my dad:)

    Nov 10, 2010 at 3:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   InYourSleep

    He should write a note thanking them! How does he think his yard got that green?

    Nov 10, 2010 at 6:33 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   FeRD bang

      Chlorophyll? Photosynthesis? Blue #40? …Guar gum?

      Nov 10, 2010 at 10:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #28.2   Worker 11811

      Dog shit kills grass if you let it lay.

      Nov 11, 2010 at 12:32 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   Crime and Poop | Roosiehood

    [...] to say, I don’t have a relevant poop story, but I did happen to see this sign on passiveaggressivenotes.com and thought I’d share. I’m very tempted to make a sign like this next time someone [...]

    Nov 16, 2010 at 6:48 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

Comments are Closed