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And heaven forbid a man even imagine cleaning a toilet himself…

November 13th, 2010 · 60 comments

Katrina‘s husband spotted this sign in the men’s room of his office in Roswell, Georgia, shortly before the boss ordered it taken down. (The “…or I will cut you” part of the manager’s removal directive was implied, obviously. Because that’s just how they do things around there.)

FILED UNDER: cleaning · crazypants · disgruntled janitor · Georgia · irregular capitalization · most popular notes of 2010 · office · toilet

60 responses so far ↓

#1 Cynta E.

You go, girl – I be right there witcha! Cleaned up after too many disgusting service personnel in my life who’ve used their weenie to spray like a firehose in my powder room. Can only wonder what their bathrooms look like in their own homes, unless it’s just that they don’t have indoor plumbing.

Nov 13, 2010 at 4:06 pm rating: 90

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#2 Smiley4099

I can’t imagine that a knife gets the bathrooms very clean, but if that’s how they do things in Georgia…

Nov 13, 2010 at 4:06 pm rating: 90

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- #2.1 Chris
  
  You are dumb! Please don’t mate with anyone.
  
  Nov 17, 2010 at 9:43 pm rating: 90
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#3 ClearlyDemented

‘Cause heaven forbid a man clean up his own bathroom. *gasp*
[mob with torches approaches]

Nov 13, 2010 at 4:10 pm rating: 90

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- #3.1 ClearlyDemented
  
  How did I miss the title before writing this (or before the time limit ran out on deleting this!)? I feel like a bad stand-up that steals others’ material, pretending they won’t notice.
  
  Nov 13, 2010 at 4:40 pm rating: 90
- #3.2 NotSoClearlyDemented
  
  I didn’t read it until I read your embarrassment. (:
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 7:39 am rating: 90
- #3.3 sarjo
  
  Obviously you are both a bit…demented.
  
  Nov 16, 2010 at 1:07 pm rating: 90
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#4 Flaboy2425

Yes, many people in Georgia still live in spirit before the Civil War. Go to nearly any fast food establishment and count the number of white people behind the counter doing the actual work. Many homes have black maids to do the cooking and cleaning for minimum wages.
Only lip service is given to emancipation and equal rights.

Nov 13, 2010 at 4:29 pm rating: 90

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- #4.1 Dixie
  
  You keep that sense of humor…
  
  Nov 13, 2010 at 5:27 pm rating: 90
- #4.2 Nack
  
  Cuz surely, she was totally oppressed and that’s why she wrote it. Or maybe, she just hates piggishly disgusting guys with no manners, and thought it’d be cute to pull a little “Diary of a Mad Black Woman” on them….
  
  Nov 13, 2010 at 9:36 pm rating: 90
- #4.3 crackersinmypanties
  
  I live very near Roswell, GA, and I read these comments purely because I KNEW someone would scream racism. It’s sad.
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 8:03 am rating: 90
- #4.4 sarjo
  
  The lady is black. Why is she black? RACISM!!!
  
  Nov 16, 2010 at 12:47 pm rating: 90
- #4.5 Roswellian
  
  I grew up in Roswell, Ga, and I’d say it’s true that there’s a pretty big handful of racist Good Old Boys in the area.
  
  Not all of us are, I swear. Not all of us think strange black ladies with knives clean bathrooms. But maybe I didn’t hang out in the right public restrooms enough. Maybe crackersinmypants knows something I don’t.
  
  Nov 27, 2010 at 3:05 am rating: 90
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#5 Melanie

I think this is the first time a PAN made me gasp in shock. I know that sounds extra pearl-clutchy, but DAMN.

Nov 13, 2010 at 4:35 pm rating: 90

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- #5.1 Edwina the Defrocked Nun
  
  PAN is getting scarier and scarier lately. How I miss the days of neatly handwritten notes from manipulative martyr-complex moms and aunts. We’re starting to talk about the kind of stuff that could seriously get you dead (not just psychologically abused).
  
  Nov 13, 2010 at 5:55 pm rating: 90
- #5.2 pony girl
  
  Thumbs up for pearl-clutchy!
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 1:47 am rating: 90
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#6 Chelle

I’m thinking that perhaps the knife comment wasn’t a veiled threat as much as the required tool to clean some of the mess. Maybe she has to scrape crap off of the walls…

Nov 13, 2010 at 5:22 pm rating: 90

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- #6.1 Chris
  
  no just merely a teaching tool for the ignorant. People should know how to use the restroom without being disgusting animals…
  
  Nov 17, 2010 at 9:52 pm rating: 90
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#7 Ross

Is there also a black lady with a fork somewhere in the building?

Nov 13, 2010 at 6:18 pm rating: 90

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- #7.1 pony girl
  
  Well, I know the dish ran away with the spoon. Not sure where the fork got to.
  Maybe the knife lady made ‘em all scatter.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 1:49 am rating: 90
- #7.2 Woman on the Verge
  
  The spoon left the dish because he just wasn’t that into her and hooked up with the fork. They are the proud parents of six little sporks.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 10:12 am rating: 90
- #7.3 shwo!
  
  Also, WotV, spork is not the preferred nomenclature. Cutlery-American, please.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 1:16 pm rating: 90
- #7.4 pony girl
  
  I love sporks!
  I wonder if they make sterling silver sporks?
  Santa?
  
  Nov 17, 2010 at 10:05 pm rating: 90
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#8 Rebekah

scariest. note. ever.

Nov 13, 2010 at 7:19 pm rating: 90

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#9 Cherie

Because your wife is a lot scarier than a mad cleaning lady with a knife!

Nov 13, 2010 at 7:42 pm rating: 90

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- #9.1 pony girl
  
  Pfft! I imagine that a wife who has to continually clean-up pee stains from around the toilet could be pretty damn scary. I, however, favor a 38 special over a knife.
  
  Seriously, how do guys miss? I don’t care how big it is, that toilet is still a huge target, there’s no excuse for missing.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 1:52 am rating: 90
- #9.2 Mike
  
  Maybe one is checking his Blackberry or iPhone and not paying attention. That’s how I misfired at work the other day.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 11:12 am rating: 90
- #9.3 Barry
  
  Well I’m a guy and I don’t get why people still argue over this. It’s so simple, if you miss, CLEAN IT UP. It’s not so much that those men have crooked dicks, it’s more like they’re fucking pigs.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 11:43 am rating: 90
- #9.4 pit pat
  
  I don’t care what people do in their free time, but no one should be fucking pigs in the bathroom at work. I’m sure the squeals are quite distracting.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 10:48 pm rating: 90
- #9.5 sarjo
  
  The dangly sex could even…sit down to pee.
  
  Nov 16, 2010 at 12:49 pm rating: 90
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#10 Pterosaur

It was Strange Black Lady, in the bathroom, with the knife.

Nov 13, 2010 at 7:59 pm rating: 90

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#11 Stephen Harper

This is why we shouldn’t let our servants learn to write.

Nov 13, 2010 at 8:33 pm rating: 90

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#12 Divvitar

If there’s a strange, Black lady with a knife around, I’m in the wrong restroom!

Nov 13, 2010 at 8:44 pm rating: 90

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#13 Odious

I didn’t assume it was the black lady that wrote the note. Was it?

Nov 13, 2010 at 10:41 pm rating: 90

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- #13.1 sarjo
  
  Yo, racist! You’re implying it wasn’t the strange black lady who wrote the note because you think all non-pales are illiterate? I resent that!
  
  Nov 16, 2010 at 12:51 pm rating: 90
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#14 havingfitz

We weren’t lucky enough to have a SBLWAK. We had the Strange Black Lady Who Screamed At Toilets to Shut Up and Shouted About the Goblin King Coming in and Messing Up Her Bathroom. Needless to say we kept the bathroom very tidy, but it was rather funny to watch new employees encounter her for the first time and coming running out of the bathroom like hounds of hell were chasing them.

Nov 13, 2010 at 11:49 pm rating: 90

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#15 Canthz_B

I don’t care who cleans the restrooms, just use them (the restrooms) rather than using a strange Black woman…especially if the Sista has a knife!

Nov 14, 2010 at 12:00 am rating: 90

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#16 Canthz_B

This note needs to be dusted for prints.

I’m pretty sure my first wife wrote it. I’d be surprised to hear she’s cleaning restrooms now, but not that she still wields a mean knife.

Nov 14, 2010 at 12:05 am rating: 90

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- #16.1 SarahWoopWoop
  
  I’m not surprised to hear that you have a first wife.
  
  Nov 30, 2010 at 10:00 am rating: 90
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#17 Loser

I don’t think it would make much difference to the piss-puddling, shit-spraying sort, if their wives DID have to clean up in their wake. Perhaps if THEY had to do it…. (Well, we all know what would happen, if they had to do it. I see a visit from the “How Clean is Your House” ladies in their future.)

Also, SBLWAK is my wife. And it’s not a knife. It’s a flat-bladed trowel–the sort one might use for shovelling poo. Aim your bowelish expulsions, people. The rectum goes OVER the hole. Not to the side, not five inches behind, not round the edge, not in the urinal–OVER the hole.

Thank you.

Nov 14, 2010 at 1:28 am rating: 90

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#18 bowloftoast

If you happen to see a strange black lady with a knife in the unemployment line, now you know why.

Nov 14, 2010 at 2:21 am rating: 90

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#19 Woman on the Verge

Is it just me, or does a Strange Black Lady with a Knife seem exceedingly more scary than most wives? I would think she would be much more motivating…

Nov 14, 2010 at 10:14 am rating: 90

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#20 RJ

My Mom told me years ago: Please help your woman! It is a “thankless” job…. When you have to do do it all, you feel “alienated” and alone. Teamwork really helps a relationship.

Nov 14, 2010 at 10:59 am rating: 90

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#21 rigor_mortis

Yeah, heaven forbid! This reminds me of EVERY FUCKING cleaning product ad, because the user is always female. Note to the Don Drapers of today: It’s the 21st century, for the fuck of shit!

Nov 14, 2010 at 11:34 am rating: 90

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- #21.1 TheHats
  
  Note to men: Buy the cleaning supplies a little more often and the advertisements might get aimed differently. (Two years retail and NEVER sold a bottle of laundry detergent to a guy.)
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 2:45 pm rating: 90
- #21.2 anglophile
  
  While I share your annoyance with the cleaning product commercials, mortis, the sad fact is the advertising folks are just using statistics and appealing to those who make the cleaning product buying decisions. Who are, overwhelmingly, women.
  
  Nov 14, 2010 at 4:49 pm rating: 90
- #21.3 Walker, "Tex" (a stranger)
  
  Wait a minute. “For the fuck of shit.” What does that even mean?
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 12:54 am rating: 90
- #21.4 Canthz_B
  
  Can I call bullshit here? I spent a number of years of my adult life as a single man, and bought my fair share of cleaning and laundry supplies, thank you very much.
  I can’t remember a single time I called a woman asking that she go to the store to buy my detergent because that’s supposed to be a “woman thing”.
  The really disgusting thing about laundry products commercials is that they assume women get some strange form of satisfaction the whiter she can get her family’s whites and the more vibrant she can get their colored clothes. That she’s failed if she hasn’t done better than the lady next-door.
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 1:47 am rating: 90
- #21.5 Rattus
  
  I, a lady of a certain age, haven’t bought a bottle of dishwashing soap or laundry soap in two decades. My husband buys our soap (not detergent – never detergent) on his visits to the healthfood store. I buy the bottles of vinegar and hydrogen peroxide during my particular shopping trips, so i’m not completely useless.
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 8:20 am rating: 90
- #21.6 jayskinner70
  
  Rattus, are you douching your toilet and bleaching its hair?
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 2:38 pm rating: 90
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#22 The Elf

Could it be that women “overwhelmingly” buy cleaning products because women “overwhelmingly” do the regular grocery shopping? I just pick cleaning products up when I’m out running all the other errands, and I buy what he asks me to buy. Mr. Elf cleans the toilets (and the rest of the bathrooms) at our house. He also does half the cooking and all of the dishes. I “de-clutter” the house and do the laundry and run the errands. It works out well. Equality, love it!

CB – I totally agree about the strangeness of the cleaning commercials. If scrubbing floors gave me the strange satisfaction those women were experiencing, I’d put away the vibrating razor and pick up the swiffer wet jet. WTF?

Nov 15, 2010 at 8:31 am rating: 90

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- #22.1 anglophile
  
  All I’m saying is, statistics and demographics show women are the ones buying the products, that’s why women are used in commercials. Don’t think Proctor and Gamble are just assuming that’s the case; they’ve done the marketing studies. Sure there’s men who buy the cleaning supplies and do the cleaning, but the bigger chunk of the customers is women. Have you watched any beer commercials lately? I drink beer, but they’re not selling it to me.
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 8:39 am rating: 90
- #22.2 The Elf
  
  Yeah, I agree. But what I’m saying is that just because studies show the women typically buy the products, it doesn’t mean that men don’t USE the products or participate in the buying decision. It’s the only data the manufactures have, but that doesn’t mean it’s entirely accurate data.
  
  Nov 15, 2010 at 1:30 pm rating: 90
- #22.3 Canthz_B
  
  Um, the studies are “family-based”. Does the laundry detergent manufacturing community think single men all wear dirty clothes? Who do they think is buying single men’s detergent for them in large measure?
  It’s an antiquated, sexist point of view that the industry has clung to.
  If I were a woman, I’d be pissed off that even today women are depicted as washer women for their men and children.
  In our home, I cook because I’m the better cook. My wife does the laundry most often, because she insists upon it (not because I’m incapable of doing laundry), but what brand of detergent we purchase is not gender-based (or biased) in any way.
  The manufactures know this as well. That’s why you don’t see any detergent marketed as a “Man’s Detergent” like you have, say, deodorants marketed by gender.
  Women drink beer, yes. But not all women or even the vast majority, so why market to them?. But everyone needs clean clothes, single men and women as well as families, so why not market to both genders?
  
  Glo, I respectfully disagree. It’s not market forces as indicated by surveys…it’s lingering sexism.
  
  Personally, I think a survey would show it has been many a year since any woman fell into despair over ring-around-the-collar, but I cannot prove that assumption. Maybe postpartum depression is actually dingy laundry syndrome?
  We need funding for a study.
  
  Nov 18, 2010 at 7:22 am rating: 90
- #22.4 SarahWoopWoop
  
  In one of my Sociology classes, we talked about how men are more likely to buy the store-brand products for things that are “less important” to them. Thus, name-brands are more aimed at women, who like the quality, and store-brands are typically for men, who want to save money.
  
  This isn’t my belief, it’s my professor’s theory.
  
  Nov 30, 2010 at 10:08 am rating: 90
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#23 Bethany B.

I dunno. I’ve seen plenty of restrooms of men that have wives, and I think using it as if it’s cleaned by a strange black woman with a knife is probably the more sanitary option.

Nov 15, 2010 at 11:24 am rating: 90

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#24 TinaBear

I think that’s backwards, it should read “DON’T use these bathrooms as if they are your wife cleaning them (Because we all know most men don’t even care about thier aim at home!) but use them knowing there is a strange black woman with a knife that HAS to clean them lurking about!

Nov 15, 2010 at 3:44 pm rating: 90

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#25 hugh_jass

A whole day, and no one’s used “Tyler Perry’s Strange Black Lady with a Knife” yet? And it’s an Atlanta PAN, no less.

Nov 15, 2010 at 7:19 pm rating: 90

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#26 Antigirl

Hilarious!!

Nov 15, 2010 at 11:40 pm rating: 90

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#27 paranoidandroid

i thought it was quite funny

Dec 1, 2010 at 11:56 am rating: 90

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