Well, that’s one way around that pesky “no eating in the library” rule

December 12th, 2010 · 53 comments

Christian and John in Manchester, U.K. spotted this sign in the library of Manchester Metropolitan University…where the fridge thieves must be really, really ruthless (or the librarians very, very dotty).

This particular library, says John, “is where the vast majority of the university’s science and law students go. I have to wonder what sort of a university I go to if prospective engineers, biologists, chemists, physicists and lawyers have to be specifically asked not to put food in the toilet brush holders.”

Adds Christian: “I imagine a further note reading: ‘Please Do Not Poop On The Ceiling.’”

Please Do Not Put Food in the Toilet Brush Holders. Thank you!

Meanwhile, in Cambridge…further evidence of U.K. university students’ curious predilection for eating while toileting.

DUE TO MASSIVE CANINE INFESTATION WE MUST ASK YOU TO  PLEASE NOT LEAVE ANY UNCOVERED FOOD OUT IN THIS BATHROOM  THANK YOU HOUSEKEEPING

related: Pizza box as air freshener?

FILED UNDER: bathroom · Cambridge · college life · food · Manchester · U.K. · WTF?


53 responses so far ↓

  • #1   cali

    Urm, somebody should tell them that’s not food.

    Dec 12, 2010 at 7:38 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   clumber

      Well it was food.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 7:55 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   The Elf

      Mmm…. Slightly melted Snickers…..

      Dec 13, 2010 at 9:26 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   shwo! bang

    It only LOOKS like a Baby Ruth bar.

    Dec 12, 2010 at 7:59 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   thrall bang

    Some things should be able to go without being said… And then there are those members of society who prove this wrong.

    Dec 12, 2010 at 8:21 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   pony girl

      What’s scary is that those people can actually read.

      Dec 12, 2010 at 8:57 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   pony girl

    I’m sorry, but I have to ask. Just what the fucking hell is going on in that library?

    Dec 12, 2010 at 8:59 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   The Elf

      Leaving food in the toilet brush holders, uncovered food in the bathrooms, and a “canine infestation”, clearly.

      It’s the canine infestation that has me wondering. Exactly how are the dogs getting into Cambridge?

      Dec 13, 2010 at 9:28 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   Woman on the Verge bang

      I don’t care how bad I have to go. I am NOT using a bathroom with a massive canine infestation.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 10:39 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   infanttyrone

      Alas(s), PG, to answer your question I am constrained by the ambiguity evident in the image of the toilet brush holder in the photo.

      Assuming the note writer to be an accurate witness to the prior presence of foodstuffs in the brush holder (although the act of witnessing such by way of writing this particular note places their common sense level on the McCloskey Revised Scale at a point just below “flaming apeshit nuts”),
      we must look beyond the text towards the brush holder an sich.

      Viewed with a dispassionate eye, the thing resembles nothing more than either a mortar/pestle or else a butter churn. Of these two images, the former is less problematic, due to the relatively small number of food items that may be presumed to be undetectable by today’s heightened screening technology, now ever-so-prevalent in airports and libraries.
      The latter image, of course, like an aggressive panhandler, cries out to beg the question of “what the fucking hell liquid were they putting into that thing and using it to try to turn it into what the fucking hell solid??”

      At the library, I always opt for the unbuttered bagel or the turkey sandwich with no mayo…. Just sayin’.

      Aloha, Feliz Navidad, etc. a ti y mis otros amigos y amigas en PAN.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_zFw5sevMIE

      Dec 13, 2010 at 10:48 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Risha

      @The Elf – They study and work hard.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 6:06 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   pony girl

      @it,
      awesome jam!

      @Risha,

      Good dog, Ubu, good dog!

      Dec 14, 2010 at 1:28 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Sonya

    What next, shit in between the books?

    Dec 12, 2010 at 9:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   anglophile bang

      Oh, don’t worry. That’s been done already. :|

      Dec 12, 2010 at 10:19 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   Maggy

      One of my cousins pooped in one of his sister’s books when he was a toddler. Do not like.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 5:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   H Bomb

    But I was saving that for later. :(

    Dec 12, 2010 at 9:27 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Madrias

    Fine, I’ll find some way to get food stuck on the ceiling and I’ll poop in the toilet brush holders. That’ll show them!

    Dec 12, 2010 at 9:30 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   anglophile bang

    I once had this crazy landlady who had written into her leases scores of one-time tenant transgressions: no red curtains (the house was yellow and she didn’t like the way one tenant’s red curtains looked), no hanging neon beer signs in the window, no moving furniture in or out through the windows, all sorts of stuff that would never cross the mind of the average tenant. I feel quite certain that if she worked at this library, “no food in the toilet brush holders” would definitely be added to the list.

    I’m also quite certain that the lease she asks her unfortunate renters to sign now includes an item “no attempting to push the landlady down the stairs” and I feel quite proud of being the cause of that addition.

    Dec 12, 2010 at 9:42 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Madrias

      Why is it pushing the landlady down the stairs sounds like something I’d do? Actually, it doesn’t quite match. I’d likely knock her down the stairs with a high-speed tennis ball, though.

      Ah, just ignore me, I’m just a little loopy today.

      Dec 12, 2010 at 9:44 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   park rose

      I worked for a company similar to that. “No Hawaiian shirts to be worn in the office”.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 4:04 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   Mike

      My company just sent out templates to be used for your email vacation notice and voice mail announcement during the upcoming shutdown. They want to control everything you do.

      Dec 14, 2010 at 7:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   HB

    Do they really mean “Canine infestation”? – packs of wild dogs roaming around the bathroom? I think they might have mean “Rodent infestation”.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 1:57 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Xenobio

      Ahhh that makes sense. Or maybe it was “vermin” and they couldn’t remember the right word. I was trying to figure out how dogs could get into the toilet. (At least in a cold country like the UK – in tropical countries on older institutional campuses toilets tend to be located away from classrooms etc. in a sort of semi-open air washroom with the main door left open, and it’s not unusual to see stray dogs and cats on some uni campuses.)

      Dec 13, 2010 at 2:29 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Who? Me?

      I really like the sound of “Massive Canine Infestation” myself … I wish I could leave some food out and see what really happens, what if it *were* true, wouldn’t that be something to see?

      I also like the the use of MUST in WE MUST ASK YOU. Not a simple WE ASK YOU, no sirree, the truth is WE MUST ASK YOU. Again, I wonder what would have happened if they didn’t ask YOU, er, ah, I guess I should say US or should it perhaps be ME? But frankly, not as much as I do about the MASSIVE CANINE INFESTATION, I just might dream about that one tonight. Smile.

      Then, there is the use of ALL CAPS, which usually conveys shouting but for some odd reason the vibe I pick up isn’t one of shouting but rather of I AM VERY DETERMINED AND SERIOUS ABOUT THIS TOPIC. Which kind of screams “control freak” to me.

      And yet, they left the comma out between the THANK YOU and the HOUSEKEEPING, and I MUST TELL YOU that really bothers me.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 4:13 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   Morgaine

      I couldn’t figure out what “Canine infestation” could mean. I really was wondering why they had so many wild/stray dogs running around in bathrooms. I thought there was probably a whole other problem they were choosing to ignore. I think I would address the problem of the wild dogs first before addressing the problem of food being left in the bathroom.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 7:08 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.4   clumber

      I found it funny that this appeared on the day I decided to sneak my dog to work with me. I should hang that sign, cross out “toilet brush holders” and substitute “garbage cans” since said canine is a garbage can inspector.

      ~Clumber, participating in the canine infestation today! (and she is the pup in my avatar over there)

      Dec 13, 2010 at 8:00 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.5   Divvitar

      I took it to mean that there is one massive canine, as in a giant dog. Perhaps Clifford the Big Red Dog has taken up residence?

      Dec 13, 2010 at 10:10 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.6   Divvitar

      Or did Fluffy escape from Hogwarts again?

      Dec 13, 2010 at 10:12 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.7   Zsa

      Ah, see… I saw the mis-spelling as “Massive Canine INFECTION”
      Which I took to mean: due to biting into some food left out for them, uncovered and harboring masses of germs, the housekeeping staff now has halitosis and periodontitis focused about the canine incisors.

      Dec 13, 2010 at 8:12 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   park rose

    I think that the books of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and Thomas Hardy are jumping off their shelves and causing a ruckus, straying all the way to Cambridge.

    Mess of the d’Ubervilles

    Dec 13, 2010 at 4:01 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Mo

    The last note gives me a case of Deja vu.
    Is Kerry recycling?

    Dec 13, 2010 at 7:13 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   clumber

    Okay, so if we are agreeing that “canine” is probably supposed to be “rodent” ; what are we to change “food” to? Is this one of those SAT comparisons? canine: rodent as food:__?__ ”

    Be sure to use your #2 keyboards only.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 8:04 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Pterosaur

      canine: rodent as food: Velveeta

      Dec 13, 2010 at 12:47 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   clumber

      So the note SHOULD read “Due to massive rodent infestation we must ask you to please not leave any uncovered valveeta out in this bathroom” then??

      Que?

      Dec 13, 2010 at 11:39 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Shalindria

    WE MUST ASK YOU TO PLEASE LEAVE ONLY COVERED FOOD OUT IN THIS BATHROOM. THE UNCOVERED FOOD BATHROOM IS IN THE BASEMENT WHERE GROSS PEOPLE WHO WANT TO GET SICK LEAVE THEIR FOOD. THANK YOU WEIRDO.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 8:06 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   April

    The second note just confuses me so much. What?! Canine infestation?! in the bathroom?! Food in the bathroom?! This note is like a perfect storm of absurdity!

    Dec 13, 2010 at 9:34 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Ed Depaine

    Bumpass’s!!!!!!!!!!!

    Dec 13, 2010 at 10:09 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Edwina the Defrocked Nun

    Is it the infestation that is massive, or the canines?

    I have an image of some very large dogs, mastiffs perhaps, roaming in packs, visiting lavatories and generally causing mayhem.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 10:12 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   shwo! bang

    I think Massive Canine Infestation is playing the SXSW Music Festival this year.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 10:15 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Who? Me?

      I’m there! And hoping they play my favorite …

      Who Let The Dogs Out?

      Dec 14, 2010 at 12:23 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   Flip-Flappin'

    I keep picturing a particularly nasty case of tooth decay.

    Why it should follow that others should not leave any uncovered food out in the bathroom is hazy, unless it’s just because NO ONE should leave uncovered food out in a bathroom.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 12:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Canthz_B bang

    I’d just like to go on record and say, not all Brits have massive canines…no matter what people say about their teeth (or poor Prince Charles).

    Dec 13, 2010 at 5:26 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #20   Canthz_B bang

    Who is dumb enough to put food in the toilet brush holder?

    Everyone knows emergency crapper rations should be duct-taped to the underside of the toilet tank lid.

    Amateurs.

    Dec 13, 2010 at 5:38 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Divvitar

    Funny thing is, the sign about the Massive Canines made PAN a few years ago.

    Dec 14, 2010 at 2:01 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   Niveus Pluma

    “Massive canine infestation”? Fascinating. Is this:
    a) The return of the Hound of the Baskervilles.
    b) An attack of enormous teeth.
    c) Really, honestly, an infestation of dogs?

    Dec 14, 2010 at 7:08 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   Amelia

    If it’s any consolation We don’t use “Bathroom” as a euphemism so I’d assume the second post was just about someone eating in the bath which is somewhat better.

    as to the canine infestation I have no idea: maybe someone was washing their Great Dane?

    That’s what all the cool kids are calling it :)

    Dec 14, 2010 at 10:48 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   Tren

    Hah! I am imagining packs of dogs roaming a university gruzzling down any unattended food and cornering people in the bathroom until they throw bags of monster munch as a distraction.

    Dec 14, 2010 at 11:59 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Alicia

    I would like to thank the Cambridge housekeeping too.

    Dec 15, 2010 at 12:48 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Ginger

    In my experience, prospective engineers, biologists, physicists and lawyers do not go to Manchester Metropolitan University. They go to The University of Manchester, the more respected University up the road. “Metropolitan” is basically a euphemism for “easier to get in to”. This sign doesn’t surprise me at all.

    Dec 15, 2010 at 7:40 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Christian

      @Ginger: Manchester Metropolitan University offers a respected law conversion course for graduates, which trains para-legals and prospective lawyers. It also has a very large engineering dept.

      Your experience seems to be one of elitism.

      The sign was a by product of the foolish decision to ban all food from the library. Thankfully that decision was reversed last year and the sign was removed shortly after.

      Christian (I took the photo)

      Jan 4, 2011 at 5:13 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   ariane

    I’m just curious about how the dogs got in the library. You can’t even take a backpack beyond the entrance, these days, let alone a whole dog. And yet there seems to be a pack of feral dogs infesting the library?? Let alone the bathrooms.

    @Ginger, sounds like in UK “Metropolitan” is similar to the US “junior college.” Not, as you might think, a college for young children, but easier to get into.

    Dec 18, 2010 at 2:06 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Cougar Allen bang

    Well, canines doesn’t just mean dogs, you know. It could equally well be referring to wolves, hyenas, etc.

    -Cougar :{)

    Dec 19, 2010 at 4:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     

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