From Stacey in Jacksonville, Florida: the blitzkrieg approach to ongoing breakroom disorder.
And from Englewood, Colorado…the passive-aggressive approach:
related: Nutra-not-so-sweet
You’re just not getting it, Sugar
December 19th, 2010 · 77 comments
FILED UNDER: blitzkrieg approach · cleaning · coffee · Colorado · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · Florida · heart · It's science! · Jacksonville · office · spoons
77 responses so far ↓
#1
pony girl
Maybe it’s performance art?
Dec 19, 2010 at 5:22 pm rating: 11
#2
PABrit
A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down. But napkin lectures, with a spoon, some fake sugar, and some PA? They mean war in the break room.
Dec 19, 2010 at 5:23 pm rating: 3
#3
lagne
Dude.. I’m alllllmost on Team Napkin Lecturer. I simply cannot understand why there is ALWAYS coffee/creamer/sugar shit dried up and scattered around the “coffee area.” Does drinking coffee automatically preclude you from cleaning up spills, dribbles, coffee rings, and white coffee-related powder?
But at least I write it anonymously on a website instead of on napkins. That’s better, right?
cackle.
(slinking back into my coffee-free cave)
Dec 19, 2010 at 5:31 pm rating: 33
#4
FeRD
Huh. I normally show my burning desire for cancer by making out with bald-headed kids down in the pedes wing at the local hospital. (That’s how you catch it, right?) But I suppose I could try their crazy sweetener idea.
Dec 19, 2010 at 5:31 pm rating: 38
#5
LULZ
That artificial sweetener was fucking delicious.
Dec 19, 2010 at 5:33 pm rating: 3
#6
Jen
Man, I feel the pain of the first three note-writers. People at my work are always leaving sugar packets beside the coffee machine. And the trash can is literally right beside the table where the coffee urn is. As a black coffee drinker, I find it somewhat unsavoury to have to clear up other people’s sugar and coffee whitener leftovers.
Dec 19, 2010 at 6:19 pm rating: 12
#7
pony girl
I’m surprised that nobody has taken the opportunity to cross out ‘these’ and replace it with ‘ me’.
Dec 19, 2010 at 6:47 pm rating: 3
#8
Amber
…I can understand the annoyance since I get stuck cleaning up the break room at work…but seriously..it took more time to write that note then to just throw the napkin with all the crap on it away…
Dec 19, 2010 at 7:30 pm rating: 1
#9
Anon
The person making the mess probably isn’t even seeing the messages. I imagine they’re there in the morning and then cleaning throws out the note at the end of the day.
Dec 19, 2010 at 7:34 pm rating: 8
#10
Pilgrimchick
Confirmed cluelessness. Sad.
Dec 19, 2010 at 7:39 pm rating: 0
#11
Canthz_B
News to note-writer:
Your napkin notes take up more space than my spoon and sweetener wrappers.
Who’s supposed to clean up after you?
Dec 19, 2010 at 10:14 pm rating: 0
#12
Canthz_B
I’m sick and tired of this crap!!
Who keeps stealing my plastic containers?!?!
Signed, B-3
Dec 19, 2010 at 10:21 pm rating: 2
#13
molly moon
I think my favorite part about the whole thing is that the person has been told not to do this and they did it again. Is the note writer a ninja? is the mess maker a ninja? am i a ninja?
Dec 19, 2010 at 10:37 pm rating: 3
#14
47of74
At my place of employment there is often a plastic spoon sitting on top of a paper towel. The overnight person has the idea that we should use a communal spoon to stir our coffee. She actually gets upset when they get thrown out. I refuse to use a communal spoon, especially in the middle of cold/flu season.
Dec 19, 2010 at 10:50 pm rating: 9
#15
Kate
Am I alone in being concerned by the waste that is created by plastic spoons and individual sachets of sugar?
If real teaspoons and a bag or canister of sugar was used there wouldn’t be as much mess.
Dec 20, 2010 at 8:00 am rating: 2
#16
Pterosaur
I never understood the need to sweeten coffee. Coffee is supposed to taste like the bitter incineration of black despair, not candy. If I wanted a sweet, creamy delight, I’d make cocoa.
Dec 20, 2010 at 8:48 am rating: 3
#17
oi
The first one is hilarious! It superficially looks like NW keeps writing and the Mr. mess keeps ignoring. What actually going on is: there is a third person who removes the note as well as mess silently before the messy guy ever sees those alarmingly increasing in number of exclamation points notes. May be this incognito guy has a mission to drive NW crazy with his silent social service. He is smiling to himself somewhere close by.
I would not blame him. I can just imagine Nw’s control freak nature around the office based on that arrow through the heart clip art in the first note.
Dec 20, 2010 at 9:05 am rating: 8
#18
Divvitar
Listen shitbag, I’m diabetic, and I wouldn’t get cancer from these sweeteners if I ate a crate of them! Next time, more Splenda and less Sweet ‘N’ Low, because saccharine is so dated.
– B-3
Dec 20, 2010 at 7:33 pm rating: 7
#19
liddy
wow, mr/ms notewriter would need psychiatric intervention if they ever saw the microwave in my workplace. Take that mess and multiply it on a grossmeter times ten-thousand.
Dec 21, 2010 at 5:42 am rating: 0
#20
The Elf
I think Note-Writer #1 is missing a key point. All three mess-leavers are all different people. Coffee drinkers are attached to their routine, and that includes their sweetener of choice. An Equal person isn’t just going to switch over to Sweet-N-Low, and a two-packet drinker won’t take one sip of one-packet coffee. (Well, unless they are really desperate). Napkin Note Writer assumes they are all the same by the escalation in tone. That won’t work, Napkin Note Writer. Two Equals never even noticed, One Equal is wondering what the fuss is all about, and Two Sweet-N-Lows is a little offended that you freaked out over one little lapse.
(For the record, I’m a one pack of Splenda gal. And I clean up after myself. Because it’s my desk.)
Dec 21, 2010 at 10:41 am rating: 3
#21
pony girl
They’re probably diabetic.
ps I think you may mean am not have
Dec 21, 2010 at 9:32 pm rating: 1
#22
WMDKitty
Jesus CHRIST, I’m disabled, and I manage to clear up my coffee mess…
Dec 21, 2010 at 10:51 pm rating: 1
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