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Stop “blocking your blessing”

February 3rd, 2011 · 76 comments

Jo spotted this testimony in a restroom at the University of the Sciences in Philadelphia.

I guessing this particular portion of the Gospel of (the) John was lost in translation from the Greek or some such — a shame, cause “God doesn’t like ugly” would make a great protest sign.


related: What would Jesus do for a Klondike bar?

FILED UNDER: CAPS LOCK · college life · ellipses-crazed · exclamation-point happy!!!! · God · grow up · Philadelphia · toilet · You call that punctuation?

76 responses so far ↓

  • #1   pony girl

    If I had seen that note, I would have added that comment.

    Talk about nasty.

    You know how people push their puppy’s face in the puppy poo while housetraining them? I wish we could do that with people who don’t flush.

    ps Every time you don’t flush, God kills a puppy.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:22 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   FeRD bang

      …But isn’t that a good thing? One less fecal-faced germ-spreader roaming the world!

      They probably fart fecal mist, too.

      Feb 3, 2011 at 11:03 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   Harmy G

      People push their puppy’s face in the puppy poo while housetraining them?

      Feb 4, 2011 at 10:21 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   clever name

      People that do not know how to house train thinks that works.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 12:10 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   oi

      Train thinks now?

      Feb 4, 2011 at 12:36 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #1.5   RadishFlavouredRhubarb


      Feb 4, 2011 at 5:09 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #1.6   Canthz_B bang

      That method of house training (more accurately of “paper training” by putting their nose to the poo with admonishment, not their face and not beating the living crap out of them, then to the newspaper with “good” petting) a puppy actually does work. It’s operant conditioning.
      It may not be the preferred method these days, but it works just the same.
      Training indoor dogs to hold it until they get outdoors is an entirely different thing.
      A “paper trained” dog will continue to pee and poo only on the newspaper.
      A “house trained” dog will know to hold it all in until he is let outside or walked.

      Spank your little bad-ass kids too…before someone fucks them up at Applebee’s. It’s Happy Hour, no one wants to hear your kids’ whining. Hire a babysitter. ;-)

      Feb 6, 2011 at 12:08 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #2   BunnyDee

    GROSS. I love the “environmental” excuse for not flushing urine, too.

    NOBODY WANTS TO SEE THAT. Seriously. Flush. What happened to the (un)healthy shame we associate with feces?

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:26 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   George

      At home we follow the guidelines:

      If it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown flush it down.

      However, in public, it’s always a flusher.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 10:57 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   RadishFlavouredRhubarb


      Feb 4, 2011 at 5:10 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   anglophile

      When I am confronted by someone else’s “yellow” in the toilet, “mellow” is not how I feel. We moved away from the outhouse for a reason, people. Flush the damn toilet.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 6:57 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   Canthz_B bang

      BunnyDee, I think the answer to your question is “Modern plumbing and sewage treatment plants”.

      But don’t quote me on that because I don’t trust those things and so don’t produce feces.

      You guessed it…I’m full of shit!! :-P

      Feb 6, 2011 at 12:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #3   Kris

    Anyone else see the irony that this God against Poopy messes message was posted at a University of the Sciences?

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:27 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   isern

      I bet an unflushed toiled annoyed Darwin, too.

      Finally, creationists/ID advocates and evolutionists find common ground.

      Feb 3, 2011 at 11:54 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Ndawg

      God’s meaning must have been: “You’re a naughty, naughty boy and that’s concentrated evil coming out the back of you!”

      Feb 4, 2011 at 3:39 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #4   Aleksander

    I like that it says “Anonymous like you”, not “Anonymous, like you” : )

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:30 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   FeRD bang

      Actually, it says that Ann Onymous like[s] you… presumably meaning the non-flusher? I think it’s lovely that Ann can be so understanding and compassionate, even in the face of such low breeding.

      Feb 3, 2011 at 11:01 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

  • #5   lagne

    Sounds to me like Poo Person’s, erm, “blessings” are flowing just fine.

    Also, a poo/potty-related lecture via the idea of “blockage” makes me giggle.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:34 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

  • #6   Guy

    There are three choices:
    Bless the blockage.
    Turn the other cheek.
    or, Start a movement.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:39 pm   rating: 50  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   RadishFlavouredRhubarb

      Good attempt. Congratulations, shame.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 5:11 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #6.2   Canthz_B bang

      Great attempt, shame on you. Guy got “WORD!” for that “good attempt”. Kind of makes you look like…

      Feb 8, 2011 at 6:43 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #7   FeRD bang

    [ TOILETTE 2:69!! ]

    Feb 3, 2011 at 10:58 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #8   Armauld

    I’m going to guess that God has bigger issues to worry about than whether someone flushes or not.
    That said, it’s pretty lazy and gross especially if poop is involved.
    As for the environmental argument, I don’t flush urine at home (unless a guest is coming over), but I always flush in public toilets and I always flush poop.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 11:03 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   thrall

      Must we “air” these personal details? All in the name of virtue…

      Feb 3, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #8.2   Nunavut Guy

      We get water once a week(less if there is blizzard),if we flushed every time we took a leak we’d be melting snow for water by Friday.

      Urine is not offensive once you get to know it.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 6:27 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #8.3   Flaboy2425

      Pee is sterile. Poo isn’t.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 11:48 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #8.4   Russian

      Urine is definitely not as bad, but it’s not sterile. For one thing, bacteria quickly start acting on it once it leaves the body. For another, it’s only sterile leaving the kidneys. On the way to or from the bladder it can get a bit mucked up. We all knew that really. Otherwise, why would we wash our hands every time we visit the bathroom?

      Feb 5, 2011 at 4:42 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #8.5   medical professional

      uh, yes – urine is sterile. bacteria “acting on it” doesn’t make it less so. the bacteria is from the world around it, not from the urine. the urine itself is sterile. should i say it again?

      and we wash our hands because it’s a good habit and hands are fucking filthy (though NOT from urine).

      Feb 11, 2011 at 12:55 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #8.6   Canthz_B bang

      Armauld, you must use a lot of air freshener, keep the temperature in your home very low, have very many guests coming over… or very few of them and use a lot of toilet bowl cleaner. Toilets stain pretty easily when they’re steeped in pee-water, and the stench is unpleasant as the bacteria thrive in there! :lol:

      Feb 12, 2011 at 7:50 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #9   thrall

    Bad! No Biscuit!

    Feb 3, 2011 at 11:05 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

  • #10   hungrygrrl

    Agreed. No one needs to see another’s poo. Pee is one thing, it disspiates, it’s generic, it’s sterile (or so they say) it doesn’t have the “personality” that a turd has. The single most gut wrenching moment I’ve had with my current roommate was when I realized that she had gone into the bathroom after I had, er, used the toilet, then showered without flushing (morning rush, unreliable water temperature, you know), and then forgot to flush post shower.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 11:21 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   GhostWriter bang

      Incorrect. I need to see your poo Right Now.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 8:34 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #11   Twez

    If my blessings weren’t so damned blocked, I wouldn’t have made a mess in the toilet.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 11:25 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   The Elf

      I figured if your blessings were blocked you wouldn’t make a mess at all. It’s when you are richly blessed, even overblessed, that the potential for mess becomes higher.

      ….and that’s not a good thing.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 1:08 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #12   Havingfitz

    I can handle unflushed poo better than I can handle going into a bathroom stall that looks like a slaughter house. A coworker of mine thinks the only explanation for how blood can get that high on the walls is that someone is whirling used tampons above their head like bolos.

    Feb 3, 2011 at 11:29 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Rinny


      Feb 4, 2011 at 12:02 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   George

      We had girls who wrote on walls with used tampons once. They got themselves suspended under the pretense that they were exposing people to a potentially life threatening disease.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 11:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   The Elf

      On the other hand “Tampon Bolos” would be a good name for a rock band.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 1:13 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   Kate from Iowa

      As gross as it is, that’s the funniest damned thing I’ve read on this site!

      Feb 4, 2011 at 1:31 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #12.5   FeRD bang

      And if you think that’s bad, you should see Havingfitz’s Ladies’ room!

      Feb 6, 2011 at 5:50 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #13   Pxmidnight

    I am acquainted with children who grew up without running water. The toilet was flushed by pouring water into it, and this was done by Mom. The kids (now teen-agers) know how to flush a modern toilet, but it is not an automatic response, you have to remind them. Folks raised with modern plumbing usually flush without thinking!

    Feb 4, 2011 at 12:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #14   Wendy

    I work as a washroom attendant in a sports venue. I work the washrooms on the main concourse, where the “normal” people have seats. My coworkers in the box area, where the people with money have seats, tell me that the more money people have, the less likely they are to flush. I guess they’re too good for it.
    So rich people are gross.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 1:14 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   clever name

      So weird. I only go to the nordstroms bathroom at the mall because it’s the store for people with money. I will piss my pants before going into a walmart bathroom ever again. Ugh.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 12:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #14.2   The Elf

      Having experienced both – my blessings were abundant that day – I can say that a tree looks more inviting than either.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 1:03 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #15   Nahhh bang

    It happens every day? I suspect more than one pooper. Probably a whole *gang* of public-toilet-poopers. Whatever you do, don’t respond to anyone in the next stall asking for toilet paper! That’s their latest lure for innocent victims!

    Feb 4, 2011 at 1:55 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #16   Grant

    I thought it was Mohammed (SAW) that said God loves beauty and despises ugly?

    Oh well. I go by the old water saving adage, if it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown flush it down.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 4:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #17   Na

    What Would Jesus Flush?

    Feb 4, 2011 at 4:06 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   Canthz_B bang

      Nothing. Because his shit didn’t stink.
      It’s stench died for our right to funk up the air.

      Besides, after about 30 years-worth of floaters on the waters, no wonder he could walk across them.

      Feb 5, 2011 at 11:44 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #17.2   Russian

      I think Christian theology has decided that jesusdidn’tpoo

      Feb 6, 2011 at 5:15 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #18   neurotic notes

    God doesn’t like ugly? Not an advertising line you see a lot of Churches using…

    Feb 4, 2011 at 6:55 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   Janellionaire

      Oh haven’t you heard? God only likes beautiful straight people. If you believe people with signs…

      Feb 4, 2011 at 12:47 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #18.2   Nunavut Guy

      Alright!!!!Heaven here I come.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 5:35 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #18.3   Odious

      If you’re ugly, then you were obviously created by abrahamic-god #2 (satan, et al). Apparently we didn’t expel excrement either unitl he came along and changed things; else god thinks poo is not ugly?
      (i.e., note-writer thinks that by having a supernatural “big-brother” the note will be taken as a more serious threat. Very PA!)

      Feb 4, 2011 at 5:50 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #19   GhostWriter bang

    God doesn’t like Ugly, except for Mother Theresa.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 8:39 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #20   Lauri

    I’m always amazed at how many people won’t go in a stall that just needs to be flushed. I don’t know how many times I’ve been able to get my business done simply because I was willing to go in and hit the flush myself.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 10:16 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Russian

      i dunno…. I go in, flush and leave.

      Feb 5, 2011 at 4:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #21   oi

    Anonymous just like you?
    I did not there were more than one type of anonymous!

    Feb 4, 2011 at 10:46 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #22   divaandwriter bang

    Just as bad: peeing all over a toilet seat and not wiping it off afterward. GROSS GROSS GROSS!

    Feb 4, 2011 at 10:47 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Russian

      I’ve never understood why about two thirds of people who pee before me do that. God must hate me (cos i’m ugly)

      Feb 4, 2011 at 4:58 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #22.2   hungrygrrl

      You know what it is most of the time? Germ phobic women who ‘hover’ because they’re afraid of letting their precious squeaky clean butts on a public toilet seat.

      They’re causing the very problem they’re trying to avoid… it boggles the mind.

      Feb 4, 2011 at 6:52 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #22.3   aaa bang

      The hoverers piss me right the fuck off (no pun intended, there). Even with the seat pissers, toilet seats are still cleaner than phone receivers (about 50 times cleaner), desktops, keyboards, and mouses (Mice? Is it the same or different for computer mice/mouses?). The hoverers don’t seem to be that worried about getting germs from borrowing somebody’s cell phone or using a public phone.

      Feb 5, 2011 at 8:58 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #22.4   Canthz_B bang

      Good toilet training should always include the phrase: “Ready, Aim, Fire!”.
      Marksmanship is important in a good little soldier.
      Gotta learn how to accurately shoot from the hip! ;-)

      Feb 5, 2011 at 11:39 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #23   oi

    oh no! This thread is going down the toilet. I can just smell it.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 10:48 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

  • #24   Antigirl

    As bad as the grammar is I am totally team note-writer.

    Feb 4, 2011 at 11:07 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #25   Divvitar

    While not flushing after a “blessing” is disgusting, I must have missed “Thou shalt not forget to flush” in Sunday School. In fact, I don’t remember waste elimination protocol ever being discussed in the Bible. Although, according to the Gloria Patri: “Praise Him from whom all blessings flow!”

    Feb 4, 2011 at 11:37 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

  • #26   VerityBrown bang

    Although the notewriter is a little weird for bring God into a discussion of toilet etiquette, the complaint against the perpetrator is completely justified. Failure to flush a public toilet is disgusting. Maybe they should install a portapotty for the use of folks who can’t be bothered to flush?

    Feb 4, 2011 at 4:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #27   Odious

    I’m guessing that if you’re being:
    Spirited Grow Up!
    You Bad Park!

    Feb 4, 2011 at 5:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #28   aaa bang

    I thought God loved ugly. I mean, why else would we have naked mole rats, the multitudes of ugly humans (inside and out), and why would every animal ever shit nasty smelly shit and not cupcakes? Or does that mean God just creates things to hate for shits and giggles? Is God a masochist? Or does that mean God is a sadist because he/she/it enjoys hating on things?

    Feb 5, 2011 at 9:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #29   Foreveryoungpoet

    This is sooooooo funny!!!!! I can’t believe someone actually put up a note like that :D

    Feb 5, 2011 at 6:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #30   Johnboy

    Maybe his Mom died before she got to that part in his (or her) toilet training. It may be it’s just a way of remembering her!! lol

    Feb 5, 2011 at 9:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #31   Canthz_B bang

    A really satisfying bowel movement being a good blessing, I’d say they’ve shared a blessing, not blocked one.

    Blessed be the stool softener…

    Feb 5, 2011 at 11:33 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

  • #32   Canthz_B bang

    Why is it so hard to admit that every now and again we produce a magnificent log. One that we are kind of proud of, no matter how gross we know that is?

    Sure, we’ve all thought “Damn! Look at that! It didn’t break! I sure wish I could show that shit to someone!” a few times.

    I say leave it and let the critics debate whether or not it’s “Art”!!

    —Robert Maplethorpe

    Feb 5, 2011 at 11:53 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

  • #33   paw print pet tags

    People can be so disgusting. And I think women are the worst too.

    Feb 7, 2011 at 7:52 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

  • #34   KST

    I will never stop wondering what “blocking your blessing” means in non-crazy person speak.

    Feb 7, 2011 at 9:55 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   FeRD bang

      That’s not true. You will eventually. I mean, someday you’ll die.

      Feb 8, 2011 at 9:41 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

  • #35   Niveus Pluma

    I’ve occasionally wondered whether there was anyone called Ann Onymous and now I have my answer.

    Feb 9, 2011 at 12:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up


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