Nope, the note below isn’t from a old folks home: it’s actually from a music camp for the young’uns.
So, is the writer taking liberties using the royal we? Or is the entire woodwind section really so backed up that prune juice has become a hot commodity? These are questions I’d rather not think about.
On that note, when you complain about your missing Activia — the yogurt Jamie Lee Curtis euphemistically claims will “regulate your digestive system” — referring to said yogurt as “ma shit” may not be the best choice of words to get your point across.
related: Live and not-so-active roommate culture
extra credit: Activia Won’t Cure your Constipation, says FTC [cbsnews.com]
(Thanks to Isaac in Missouri and Kim in Chicago for their submissions!)
31 responses so far ↓
#1
shwo!
If they ate your Activia, there will be no shit left to kick out of them.
Feb 16, 2011 at 12:44 pm rating: 90
#2
Woman on the Verge
If she kicks the shit out of you, you won’t need the fricking Activia.
Feb 16, 2011 at 12:50 pm rating: 90
#3
unsatisfied
AC-tiv-eee-YAAAAAAA!
Feb 16, 2011 at 12:57 pm rating: 90
#4
Rebekah
making people lose their appetite to prevent their eating your yogurt = WIN!
Feb 16, 2011 at 12:57 pm rating: 90
#5
unholyghost2003
When I worked at an ESL camp for Japanese Exchange students the second week of camp meals always switched from regular American cafeteria style food to high fiber with a side of prune juice because by the second week the dietary switch would make 95% of the students constipated. So what I am saying is, I don’t doubt that at band camp (with the stress and the food changes) Metamucil would be in bigger demand than E at Burning Man.
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:02 pm rating: 90
#6
kweef
their shit was fuckin delicious.
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:03 pm rating: 90
#7
The Elf
This one time, at band camp…..
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:14 pm rating: 90
#8
MD
You do NOT want to know what happens to those found ‘dipping their spoons’ into the bran or the Fibre-One….
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:15 pm rating: 90
#9
The Elf
These music camp students need to get with the program. Don’t stick a note on your yogurt! Put your yogurt in the crisper drawer and stick a note on the entire drawer. That way, you don’t have to get into the gory details.
–Elaine
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:17 pm rating: 90
#10
Jodi
If the trombone section would get their slides out of their asses, they wouldn’t need the activia!
Feb 16, 2011 at 1:33 pm rating: 90
#11
coco
I’ve had it with you and your emotional constipation!
One word for ya: Laxative. Sold in many easy one step forms at the same grocery store you bought the prune juice and activia from. This thing called laxative can be be stored in your toiletries bag and no one is the wiser. Also water helps, lots of water.
Feb 16, 2011 at 2:30 pm rating: 90
#12
unsatisfied
The more that I keep reading this, the more I need to take a shit.
Feb 16, 2011 at 3:57 pm rating: 90
#13
red velvet
What they wrote was “ma shit” when what they meant to write was “my ability to shit”.
Feb 16, 2011 at 4:46 pm rating: 90
#14
umlimo
I suspect the thief couldn’t give a shit…
Feb 16, 2011 at 6:08 pm rating: 90
#15
aaa
People are actually willing to eat something as horrid as Activia? You’d probably be better off eating the shit that the non-constipated people crap out.
Feb 16, 2011 at 7:16 pm rating: 90
#16
Chicken Underwear
http://www.hulu.com/watch/10304/saturday-night-live-colon-blow
The original
Feb 16, 2011 at 8:22 pm rating: 90
#17
cizzerhand
when she says “STOP TAKIN MA SHIT” what she means is, she would like the opportunity to handle her own bidnaz. thanks.
Feb 16, 2011 at 8:28 pm rating: 90
#18
Cynta E.
Man, this brings back not PA memories, but downright aggressive ones. I was working my way through college and really cash-strapped and this rich, trust fund beyotch in my dorm used to steal ma fruit every day from the community fridge – she was completely unapologetic and even dismissive of me that I left a pleading note asking the dorm not to take my food (I was on a special diet). When I asked the dorm as a group about it, she didn’t even consider it theft! Way classy broad. I shoulda decked her. Food bandits are one of the lowest life forms. I totally sympathize with the note writers, and an Ex-lax, poison curse on all food thieves!
Feb 16, 2011 at 10:41 pm rating: 90
#19
Lauren--NY
I’m mostly impressed by the fancy ampersand in the first note.
Commenters one and two must now hook pinkies and say “jinx!”
Feb 16, 2011 at 11:23 pm rating: 90
#20
Divvitar
Reminds me of my college days. I stopped a chocolate thief in my Quad by replacing a Symphony Chocolate bar with Chocolate ExLax. Suddenly, there weren’t any more being stolen!
Feb 17, 2011 at 2:42 am rating: 90
#21
Grant
Ah. Prune juice. A warrior’s drink.
Feb 17, 2011 at 3:27 am rating: 90
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