Some relationship advice from your roommate

April 10th, 2011 · 53 comments

Vanessa in Baton Rouge can vouch that that the state of her friend Charles’s bathroom and boudoir is “perpetually dirty.” Oddly, though, “of all the times I’ve been over to Charles’ apartment with his girlfriend, I’ve never, ever seen his roommate.”

(Which makes me wonder…could this note from Charles’s “roomie” actually have been written by said girlfriend? I’m not sure which scenario would be more passive-aggressive.)

Charles, Here's a thought. If you would like your girlfriend to come over more, maybe you should try cleaning up your room and BATHROOM. love, roomie :)

FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · Baton Rouge · cleaning · roommates · sig o · signed with love · smiley


53 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Mandiiiiii

    At any rate, Charles’s roommate must be a female because that’s definitely not a guy’s handwriting, and another guy probably wouldn’t care! lol

    Apr 10, 2011 at 10:30 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Jaylemeux

      That is female handwriting, but guys as a collective definitely do not care less about clean bathrooms than girls. I have been disgusted by too many all-girl bathrooms to believe that old line.

      Apr 10, 2011 at 10:49 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   Rhamza

      plus, the little writing at the bottom right, which I assume is Charles’ writing, says, “heres a thought, Tits or gtfo” a guy wouldn’t say that to another guy…I don’t think…?

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:45 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   JetJackson

      Reminds me of Izzard.

      “Tits or GTFO!?”

      “Ah, tits please.”

      “You! Tit’s or GTFO!?”

      “Tit’s for me too please.”

      “We’re gonna run out of tits at this rate”

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:58 pm   rating: 58  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   TickleMyBambo

      Unless that other “guy” had really nice bodacious manboobies ; )

      Does a certain fellow named Charles yearning to perform a motorboat?

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:58 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   aaa bang

      I bet Charles spends too much time on the internet and just forgets how to behave in real life. Once you’re off of 4chan and Chatroulette and the other online bastions of teenage boys (or those who appear to be teenage boys), all “TITS OR GTFO” does is get you a punch in the face and a sexual harassment suit.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 9:20 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Divvitar

    Next week on “Hoarders,” Charles is confronted by his PA roommate…

    Apr 10, 2011 at 10:32 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   katie

    It’s weird how that writing is 100% from a female. I swear my handwriting is not so identifying :\

    Apr 10, 2011 at 10:34 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   andria

      I think mine could go either way, with a slight leaning toward female. My identifier is that I use full circles for my i’s instead of just dotting them.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 3:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   JetJackson

      I think the Love Roomie is a bit of a give-away also…

      Apr 11, 2011 at 5:03 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Leonna

      agreed. Mine is really sloppy…almost looks like chris’s handwriting up there.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 8:40 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   The Elf

      Mine either, Katie. In fact, mine isn’t readily identifiable as human.

      Apr 12, 2011 at 11:47 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   Divvitar

      Elf must be an M.D. Is there a Doctor on the planet that has legible writing?

      Apr 12, 2011 at 12:08 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   nazi

    It’s passive aggressive, but I don’t care! The possessive of a name that ends with an s simply has an apostrophe on the end. The submitter is correct in saying Charles’.

    I’ve lost focus. I don’t care!!!

    Apr 10, 2011 at 10:52 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   SP

      Charles’s is correct, too. Editor here.

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:07 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   more knowledgeable nazi

      Totally off the original topic, but you are completely wrong.

      In fact, the very first page of “The Elements of Style” lays out the rule,
      “Form the possessive singular of nouns by adding ‘s. Follow this rule whatever the final consonant.”

      Strunk and White even use the example “Charles’s friend” to illustrate the rule.

      *****
      Edit: just to be clear, I was responding to #4, not #4.1.

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:12 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Canthz_B bang

      You’re both right, depending on where you happen to be:

      “Add apostrophe s to the end of a singular noun, even if it ends in s (this practice may vary in some places)”
      http://www.dailywritingtips.com/the-possessive-apostrophe/

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:24 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   clumber

      I believe that our beloved PAN owner covered for this exact scenario by using each form in the post.

      1. Charles’ apartment (from a quote, but Kerry has editor’s rights so I count this as her decision)
      2. Charles’s “roomie”

      Therefore the benevolent has given each opinion its due, and each its opportunity to argue as well. We are truly loved.

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:28 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.5   FeRD bang

      See? Now can’t we all just get a long?

      Apr 10, 2011 at 11:31 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.6   Janellionaire

      Ok, so what if your last name ends with an s? Like Hanks. Plural would be the Hanks (or is it the Hankses?). Would the plural possessive be Hanks’ or Hanks’s? Or Hankses’? Or Hankses’s? I’m pretty sure at least that last one is wrong.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 1:09 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.7   Canthz_B bang

      I’d go with Hanks’…but that’s jus’t the way I was’ taught.

      I will add that my MS’ Word s’pellchecker accepts’ both as’ valid.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 1:41 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.8   Daniel

      Strunk and White also uses the passive voice while suggesting to not use the passive voice … it isn’t gospel, it is a 90+ year old text, and when people correct others by citing it they show their capacity to blindly obey instead of their ability to think independently … sorry, I just hate that book.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 2:19 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.9   TickleMyBambo

      Where is Pony Girl when you need the Grammar police? Cause I could OF sworn she would OF come across this thread and psychically could not OF been able to control herself and her need to correct any and all Grammatical errors!

      Apr 11, 2011 at 4:31 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.10   it's naptime

      CB, I can’t read that without hearing it in Sylvester’s voice.
      The cat not the Stallone.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 1:55 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.11   Canthz_B bang

      Janellionaire, “Hankses’s” is just fine…Ebonically un-speaking of course. ;-)

      Apr 11, 2011 at 9:43 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.12   N.

      “Hankses’s” is just fine

      It isn’t.

      “The Hanks family lives here.”
      “There are 32 Hankses in just this one house.”
      “This is the Hankses’ house.”

      Apr 13, 2011 at 2:51 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.13   Canthz_B bang

      It isn’t?!

      Well, thank God you came along, otherwise someone may have taken my words as fact!

      Sure, some might have thought it was just a joke, but we both know the vast majority thought it was a grammar lesson, right?

      Apr 13, 2011 at 8:57 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   TickleMyBambo

    Hey Roomie,

    I truly appreciate the advice! But I must inform you that you are mistaken in the belief that I don’t clean my room enough.. In fact, I just finished cleaning it 3 hours ago. As far as the bathroom is concerned.. Since we share this space, I am all for picking up after myself but when it comes to bloody tampons missing the trash can, long blonde hair in the shower drain, bras thrown all over the floor and make up all over the counter.. I’m afraid these certain messes are out of my control and if you want a “cleaner” bathroom I suggest you tend to those right away so I don’t feel like all my hard work cleaning was nothing but a waste.

    Love,
    Charles : )

    P.S. My girlfriend would be willing to come over more if my roommate wasn’t such a passive aggressive bitch. : )

    Apr 10, 2011 at 11:28 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   andria

      Bloody tampons missing the trash can?!

      You do realise tampons are flushable, right? I’d say the majority of women will flush, not put it in a trash can. And even if they do trash it, it’s not something you just throw in the general direction of a trash can and don’t look to see if it makes it.

      Either you have no idea wtf you’re talking about or you hang out with some nasty women.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 3:45 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   TickleMyBambo

      Wow Andria, don’t get your bloody tampon tied up in a knot.. It’s a JOKE! And bitch please, you don’t FLUSH a tampon down the toilet!!! Wait, I take it back.. You can flush tampons down the toilet… That is if you want to deal with your toilet getting all clogged up : ).

      Apr 11, 2011 at 4:11 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   beanster

      just a completely humourless agreement with TMB that you DO NOT, in fact, flush tampons. I usually refrain from such sweeping generalizations, but they seem to be the style and a do love a good parallel:

      You do realise (sic) tampons are damaging to your plumbing and the sewage system, right? I’d say the majority of women would never dream of flushing a tampon and prefer to put it in a trash can.

      Either you have no idea wtf you’re talking about or you hang out with some nasty and uninformed women.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 8:27 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   anglophile

      I’ve been in enough women’s restrooms to know a significant percentage of women not only do NOT flush their tampons, but they do also just throw them in the general direction of the trash can. :|

      Apr 11, 2011 at 9:57 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Canthz_B bang

      I’ve been in enough…never mind, I plead the fifth!

      Apr 11, 2011 at 10:16 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   TickleMyBambo

      “I’d say the majority of women will flush, not put it in a trash can”

      Think about it, if that were really the case.. The maximum amount of fluids a tampon can absorb is 15- 18 grams while on average it’s 9 – 12 grams.. When they get all wet they tend to turn into a pretty decent sized wad. Almost like taking a large wad of toilet paper and shoving it down your drain. Now you add in that tampons much be changed very 4- 6 hours, 7 days (maybe longer or shorter, every woman’s cycle is different) a week you’re continually flushing these used tampons down the toilet. Not only would a lot of septic systems be overfilled, but also imagine the considerable amount of damage tampons can do to your plumbing. The constant money and time being spent to fix all that damage, all because some uninformed women decided it was good idea to flush their tampons instead of throwing them in the trash (WHERE THEY BELONG), would be a never ending exhausting endeavor of overflowed sewer systems and many bathrooms smelling like dead fish.

      But obviously I dunno wtf I’m talking about but that is why I hang out with nasty but INFORMED women : ).

      Also, I take it you’ve been to a lot of undisclosed places CB?

      Apr 11, 2011 at 11:40 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.7   Janellionaire

      Any woman who has ever suffered the humiliation of seeing the bucket full of whatever was stopping up your septic system and recognizing those little red mice as your own will never flush another tampon.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 12:31 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.8   chesire cat

      It depends. I use the cardboard kind and they are flushable. Says so right on the box. I don’t flush the applicators in our current house because we have a septic tank but if we are on sewer I would.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 4:17 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.9   TippingCows

      With a septic tank you don’t flush. Most other plumbing you can flush tampons all you like and it’s fine.

      Apr 11, 2011 at 4:42 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.10   TickleMyBambo

      The one’s that are supposedly “flushable” don’t always work. I used to go to an all girls school, and I knew a lot of girls who would use the flushable tampons, and the school had public sewage systems.. 2 months and they not only had to unclog the system, they also had to get all new drains and a no flushing tampon sign. It’s safest to not flush, then to do it over and over again until something eventually does happen and all you can think is “OH FUCK!”

      Apr 11, 2011 at 6:36 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.11   Canthz_B bang

      I agree with Glo. I used to have to clean the ladies’ (ladies’s?, naw) room when I worked in a restaurant, and the vast majority of women have no shot at making it in the WNBA.

      Get it? No shot?! HA!!

      Apr 11, 2011 at 9:27 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.12   The Elf

      If you have a septic tank system, you do NOT flush tampons (applicator or actual). Never. Well, unless you like sewage backups and expensive repairs.

      But there’s no excuse for missing the trashcan.

      Apr 12, 2011 at 11:50 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Canthz_B bang

    Well, if this was written by the girlfriend, it would sure explain Charles’ response in the lower left.

    You really can’t ask a guy to do much if you don’t give him some incentive.

    Give the boy some titty love and he’ll clean-up the place hoping to get to 3rd base!

    Apr 11, 2011 at 1:56 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   havingfitz

    Can’t helping thinking that “Tits or GTFO” would have made a much better door sign on last week’s nursing room.

    Apr 11, 2011 at 8:24 am   rating: 60  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   aaa bang

    Hey Roomie, not dirt
    Expressing myself, so tits
    Or GTFO

    Apr 11, 2011 at 9:16 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Kara

    Guarantee that if Charles’ girlfriend started showing her face more often he’d get another note about a house guest policy.

    Apr 11, 2011 at 10:46 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Car Services Los Angeles

    I really wish my boyfriend’s roommate would say the same thing. I think that dirty bathrooms is a part of male genetics, though. Maid service?

    Apr 11, 2011 at 3:47 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Somebody Else

    And apparently, so did the PAN goddess.

    Which is why you were selected for the Word of the Day. In fact, she rather set you up to put the words into your mouth, but thank God you finally recognized them (they went right over the head of so many of the other posters).

    I’m sitting here noticing (after all, how could I not?) 1) your clever bon mot, 2) after yesterday’s word of the day, “They’re trying to starve our babies! OUR BABIES!” (which receieved a whopping total of 12 thumbs (yawn) on a thread that was hopping, I tell you, hopping), 3) and then today’s delightful little PAN about “funny because it’s not true” drunken Moms, and last but certainly not least, 4) the prompt closing of the original thread so I could not officially reply there.

    Methinks I must have pushed somebody’s button. Can’t wait to see what the goddess has planned for Mother’s Day. And how ironic that the queen of PAN is choosing to passive-aggressively continue the conversation in terms that she alone can control. It really doesn’t get much better than that. Oops – it actually does – apparently I’ve been banned? How incredibly PA delicious of you!!!!

    Shoutout to CB – hey, Einstein who already knows everything, try googling “Nestle’s boycott” and “nestle history marketing” and see what comes back.

    Nestlé’s perceived marketing strategy was first written about in New Internationalist magazine in 1973 and in a booklet called The Baby Killer, published by the British NGO War On Want in 1974. Nestlé attempted to sue the publisher of a German-language translation (Third World Action Group) for libel. After a two-year trial, the court found in favour of Nestlé because they could not be held responsible for the infant deaths ‘in terms of criminal law’. Because the defendants were only fined 300 Swiss Francs (just over US$400 adjusted for inflation), and Judge Jürg Sollberger commented that Nestlé “must modify its publicity methods fundamentally”, TIME magazine declared this a “moral victory” for the defendants.

    Notice that was back in 1973. Hmmm, isn’t that around the time some of our own mother ‘s were mothering (just like I said in my post)? In case you miss my point, and I expect you will, who do you think that formula makers aimed their marketing at before they went to the third world? Oh, that’s right, moms living in the first world. And what did those formula makers do in the third world? The baby food industry stands accused of promoting their products in communities which cannot use them properly; of using advertising, sales girls dressed up in nurses uniforms, give away samples and free gift gimmicks that persuade mothers to give up breast feeding … Two out of four of those techniques are still used in the first world today; and once a mom dries up, she no longer has a choice.

    From The Baby Killer:
    The move from traditional rural cultures to an urban way of life strongly influenced by the West is a major factor in the trend from breast feeding, As the social position of women changes and they go out to earn a wage, there are obvious pressures against breast feeding. Adoption of Western attitudes, like looking at the breast as a cosmetic sex symbol rather than a source of nourishment, reinforce the trend …

    Third World babies are dying because their mothers bottle feed them with western style infant milk. Many that do not die are drawn into a vicidus cycle of malnutrition and disease that will leave them physically and intellectually stunted for life … Even in Britain- where standards of living are high and most families live in hygienic conditions, babies still suffer from infections passed on to them by feeding bottles – as hospital statistics show …

    So, CB, before you make a claim that “no infants were ever suffering in the first place”, perhaps you should know what the f*** you are actually talking about. And I don’t really care how many ignorant smart-asses think that their important personal phone calls on company time are more important than the rights of nursing mothers trying to, sing it with me, literally feed their babies.

    I did mispeak, though, perhaps doctors didn’t say that formula was “better” nutritionally back then, I believe what they said that it was “just as good”. It was formula makers, like Nestlé, who were convincing western Moms that formula was overall a better solution than breastfeeding, back in a day when people were generally more trusting (weren’t we just talking about that the other day … I wonder where?)

    And babies have literally gotten ill and/or died because of that misinformation. But I got a few small details wrong – which of course you now have liberty to *completely ignore everything* I have said.

    Sincerely,
    Somebody Else who used to be Who? Me?
    xoxo

    Apr 12, 2011 at 1:45 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Alicia

      What the fuck was that?

      Apr 13, 2011 at 2:19 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   Canthz_B bang

      Um, the thread is closed. The topic is over…let go and let PanGoddess. ;-)

      Apr 13, 2011 at 9:06 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   eliz

      tl:dnr

      Apr 13, 2011 at 11:34 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   obviously

    1) Obviously babies that die of malnutrition are not getting very much bottled milk or any other kind.

    2) Babies with digestive system infections tend to have a hard time getting nutrients into their systems be it from breast milk or formula and that can also lead to life threatening malnutrition.

    3) Infections from feeding bottles happen because the bottles are not properly sterilised. It can happen whether breast milk or formula is in the bottle. Your point then would be that expressing breast milk for later feeding of baby is dangerous, so lets close the nursing mother rooms and save some babies, yes?

    Is it possible there are any other contributing factors to the high third world infant mortality rate or it solely attributable to formula?

    You do a fine job of citing effect, but a poor job of proving cause even tho you obviously feel strongly about this issue.

    Apr 13, 2011 at 9:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Canthz_B bang

      Just what I would have said…hmmm… :-P

      My meaning was quite clear. No babies were ever suffering because they were formula fed vs. breast fed, though we all have always known that breast feeding is best, it may not be practical for all people or situations and modern formula feeding is an acceptable alternative for most rational people.

      I do know what the fuck I’m talking about, and you did not “misspeak”, you were flat out WRONG.

      Back-pedaling is tiring, isn’t it?

      Nice try on the whole “Don’t you feel sorry for all the little children of color?” gambit though. Showed a real touch of class on your part.
      “Moral Victories” are nice, but legal victories are binding and make for legal precedent. Your side lost and made it harder for others to win in the future.
      That’s what you get for going off half-cocked. ;-)

      Trying to forge a link between bottle-born infections and formula was about the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. If bottle-feeding is so dangerous, why in the world would you want to express milk, put it in a bottle and insert said bottle into you precious infant’s mouth?

      Way to undercut your own argument there, Sparky.

      Don’t be such a pessimist. I’ll not ignore what you have to say…I’ll just point out where you’re wrong.

      No one said formula was better, what they said was that it was a viable alternative…which it was and still is.

      Apr 13, 2011 at 10:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   karen

    apostrophe use, flushing tampons, and dead babies… what were we talking about?

    Apr 13, 2011 at 11:26 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   John The Baptist

    I’m a guy 100% but that could easily be my hand writing, that is not enough evidence to say it is a woman’s writing.

    May 18, 2011 at 4:44 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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