Your not narmal, Sneeky

April 17th, 2011 · 115 comments

Tina in Jacksonville, Florida was in the process of moving out of her current apartment — apparently not a moment too soon — when she spotted this note on the door of her downstairs’ neighbor.

I’m not sure which is more disturbing: the content of this note (as best as I can follow it) or the truly sic spelling and punctuation. Altogether, it just kinda freaks me out.

Your not Narmal, Sneeky

So thanks, Tina, for giving me another reason to avoid what is probably my least-favorite state. (Not that I don’t cherish my time with you in Clearwater, Grandma Cookie!!!)

related: If it’s on Jersey Shore, it’s not coming through the door

FILED UNDER: apostrophe catastrophe · crazypants · Jacksonville · most popular notes of 2011 · sex sex sex · spelling and grammar police · WTF? · your/you're


115 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Hirayuki

    Can anyone work out what’s written on the other side?

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:08 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Rinny

      If you turn it sideways and flip it:

      “Be here about 7:00PM tonite
      Going to try another
      women(?) room mate”

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:20 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   eliz

      Be here about 10 PM. Going to try another (?) room mate.

      Man, I’m so freaked out by this note. I hope I don’t dream of Hannibal tonight!

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:22 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Lana Kane

      I flipped it in Photoshop, it appears to just be a reiteration of the first few lines of the note. I can make out “Be here about ____ p.m. tonite” and then “to try another room mate.”

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:35 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   Divvitar

      Her spelling obviously didn’t improve after the rough draft.

      Apr 17, 2011 at 11:57 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   Tatterdemalion

      Re: the Hannibal Lecter references, are you kidding? Now there was a guy with killer grammar.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 12:24 am   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   clumber

      Your “Intertube of the day” is in the mail. Dr. Lector also had enunciation to die for!

      Quid Pro Quo… Clariccccce.

      Our next oddball dog is going to be a Dobe (Quite different from adobe…) and i will have a difficult time not naming it either Agent Starling or Clarice.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:06 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   TickleMyBambo

      I’m sorry but the contents of this note screams DELIVERANCE to me… “You ain’t normal..You sure don’t squeal like a piggy to me.. Be here at 7 pm, going to try to ride another roommate”.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:04 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.8   eliz

      You are so right, TMB. I would remove all references to Hannibal if I could, and replace them with … what’s that gap-tooth guy’s name?

      I guess I initially thought that the writer was going to “try” another roommate to see if she tasted better than the first.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 11:27 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.9   Mrs.Beasley bang

      Eliz – you mean Mike Tyson? He might bite off body parts, but unlike Hannibal I don’t think he would actually consume them.

      Apr 19, 2011 at 12:15 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Hannah

    I would give my left ovary for the background story.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:17 pm   rating: 68  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   eliz

      I think Hannibal, the Innovation Messagner, would love it with fava beans and Chianti!

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:24 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   clumber

      I’ll donate both my ovaries to the cause! In good health! Never used! Hell, I’ll even pay for shipping!

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:08 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Kristen Bellatti

    That’s a little creepy. It’s another reminder of how poor the school system.

    As for the back of the note: I tried to read it, and it looks like it was a first draft of the side of the note we can see.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:20 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Sandee

      And THAT is what is disturbing… there was a first draft, and this is the final copy.

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:53 pm   rating: 63  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Divvitar

      ditto.

      Apr 17, 2011 at 11:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Jimmy James

      He should fire his editor.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:05 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   Sarah

      yeah, “how poor the school system”

      looks to me like low intelligence. No need to blame the schools for “incess”.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:15 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   TickleMyBambo

      How could you blame the school system for one’s lack of “sex emotions” and for being a “sneeky scorn womon”? Sure most the student population, as well as the faculty, being “incess” probably doesn’t help things but still don’t blame the school system for the Note writers horrible spelling and grammar, as well as his unrequited love for his sister.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:32 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   The Elf

      I blame “incess” on inbreeding.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 2:41 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   TippingCows

      I blame this on being a foreigner.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 2:46 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   sleeps

      Disagree. Foreigners may have problems with verb conjugation and tenses, but generally their spelling is not bad. Unless you mean a member of the band Foreigner, in which case I might agree with you.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 5:52 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.9   Jimmy James

      Well, the writer *does* seem rather hot blooded- just check it (the note) and see!

      Apr 19, 2011 at 9:21 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   chrys

    My favorites are be side’s and womew.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:22 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Jordie

    Am I the only one who noticed he literally NAILED it into the door?

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:23 pm   rating: 101  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   The Elf

      When you have 95 complaints about someone, nailing it to the door is the only way to get reformation.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:02 am   rating: 66  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   TickleMyBambo

      That’s what I call, hitting the nail right on the head ; ).

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:13 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Ace of Space

      Mayhap if he could have nailed the sneeky womew then he would not have had to nail this note to the door.

      Team Scorn.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 9:39 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   KST

      No, I noticed that too. I was going to comment on it but I thought I’d check and see if anyone else had first.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 2:22 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.5   Nunavut Guy

      Just two nails short of a crucifixion.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 7:50 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.6   Canthz_B bang

      Nice. I don’t think Martin Luther has ever been referenced here before…though we’ve dealt with well over 95 feces notes and pretty much nailed them all.

      *shout-out to National Lampoon Magazine*

      Apr 18, 2011 at 11:39 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Frecklekelly

    I think the opposite side says, “I’ll be here about 10pm tonight. I’m going to try another woman roommate.”

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:26 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   Angie

    Well, I’ve never been a huge fan of incess, either – but I DO have sex emotions. (However, I’m sneeky AND a scorn womon so I would totally not make it as her roomie.)

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:26 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   TickleMyBambo

      I think that the note writer is trying to imply that by being a sneekly scorn womon that would sneek off to incess with others, her roommate lacks the proper sex emotions needed to adhere to what society and the note writer deems as “normal sex emotions” .

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:20 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   mghmmghhmghh

    I was like haha yeah that’s another funny and crazy note haha

    until I got to INCESS!!!!

    and then I was all like

    D:

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:26 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   Kellyn

      i’m with you… ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! i think i just threw up in my mouth a little…

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:09 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   TickleMyBambo

      Incess = D: *barf*

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:41 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.3   Janellionaire

      It’s ok, guys, I don’t think anyone’s gonna get on here and be all, “Team Incess!”

      Apr 18, 2011 at 12:04 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.4   TickleMyBambo

      No Narmal sex eomtion fueled person is going to come on here with their “Team incess” t-shirts on.. Unless they were either a troll looking for trouble or they’re actually banging their mother.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 12:12 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.5   TKD

      Team Incess all the way!

      I’ve never liked that metric system. It totally screwed over my trip to Europe. I kept telling the ladies “I’m packing twelve” and they would just walk away laughing.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:38 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.6   anglophile

      @ Janellionaire, you haven’t ever seen my brother. I’d do him.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 6:09 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Nick

    The back looks like “I’ll be here about ?:00 pm tonight I’m going to try another women roomate” Thats about all I can make of it. Love the full size nail holding up the paper btw.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:28 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   jadefirefly

    The contradiction of wanting nothing to do with ‘incess’ and ‘blood’s thicker than water’ is cracking me up.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:29 pm   rating: 59  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   pony girl

      Oh, good. I wasn’t the only one.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:24 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   park rose

      You think he might actually be her brother? A whole “Flowers in the Attic” kind of scenario? At least in Innovation Messagner’s mind.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 3:25 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   TickleMyBambo

      I wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case.. The note writer reminds me of Ed Gein.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 12:29 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   ScornWoman

      I couldn’t figure out the “Blood is Thicker Than Water” bit…until I thought about it…maybe THAT is why she prefers incess…

      Apr 19, 2011 at 1:11 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Rhamza

    wow…

    There isn’t really any other word to describe this…

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:37 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   scorn woman

      I really hope English is the notewriter’s second language. [That is not an invitation to start bitching about "if you come here, you better learn the damn language!" - just the fervent hope of a grammar fanatic.]

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:55 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   scorn woman

      sorry, Rhamza, didn’t mean to reply directly to you. :-)

      Apr 17, 2011 at 10:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   Vegangeekgirl

      I have English as a second language and I don’t spell that bad, ever!
      Having English as a second language is no excuse for spelling that bad.

      The note is frightening and hard to read due to poor spelling and poor penmanship.
      When you finally figures out what it says it’s also highly confusing.

      Apr 29, 2011 at 6:40 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   kathtea

    Syntax indicates English isn’t his first language… content indicates a big cauldron of crazy soup, served to everyone in the house.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:47 pm   rating: 35  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Mrs.Beasley bang

    This note is seriously scary to me.

    Therefore I will only comment on how amazed I am that “innovation” is spelled correctly. Seriously.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 10:53 pm   rating: 50  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   FeRD bang

      I’m with you, Mrs. B. There’s nothing more entertaining than a chronic misspeller who, in the middle of a screed riddled with cringe-worthy abuses of the English language*, suddenly throws down this word that’s far more complicated and challenging that all the others… and it’s somehow perfectly-spelled! It’s a lot like watching a drooling savant play Mozart; disturbing, but awesome. :)

      *(I’m talking serious “English Teacher’s Recurring Nightmare”-type horror shows, where even words like “cat” or “head” or “help” or “you” aren’t safe from butchering. Just absolute travesties of the written word.)

      Apr 18, 2011 at 5:35 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   madrugada

      I’m thinking maybe he meant something besides “innovation” and misspelled THAT. Like immolation?

      Freaky, man. Like everyone else, wow, would I like to know the backstory.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 5:55 am   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   seamonkee

    i’m from Jax. Considering the public school system here, that’s some purdy darn gud ritin.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 11:17 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   JustAsIAm1010

      As a 22 year veteran teacher of the public school system I can honestly say I have non-english speaking students who at the age of 13 write much better than this note writer. I am going to go out on a limb and say this writer is missing a few cards in his deck. Just my opinion. . . . .

      Apr 17, 2011 at 11:34 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   park rose

      He’s paid his dues . . . plus fairly consistent and native speaker-like use of articles and prepositions means that I tue put him on the far side of native speaker batshit crazy.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 3:29 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Hitachiin

    The best part of this note is the proper use of “than”.

    Oh, and the fact that it has been nailed up.

    Apr 17, 2011 at 11:36 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Divvitar

    I didn’t realize that being a roommate required “sex emotions.” If he’s that desperate, I’m sure there are prostitutes available. I doubt he’s going to find anything but scorn from a new womew roomie.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 12:02 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   clumber

      Perhaps the previous and rejected roomie hated the marathons of Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” and the batshit crazy PAN writer hear it wrong…?

      Too far a stretch?

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:11 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   El Jefe

    To the host/narrator of this blog post: all fans of Florida will appreciate this Matt Taibbi jewel.

    http://www.buffalobeast.com/79/vicious.htm

    -key part at the end: “Florida, that’s where I’d look.”

    Apr 18, 2011 at 12:43 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   RP

      That was fairly awesome.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:47 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   ashmeadow

    I feel like this was written by a person with a couple different personalities just waiting to come out at inappropriate times.

    I’d say his erratic penmanship agrees with me.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 1:29 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   The Elf

      That so completely explains the incess/blood contradiction that I can no longer allow any other alternative explanation. We have the answer, people. There’s the backstory, and it’s a doozy.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:05 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #19   Sarah

    A few people assumed the note writer was a woman, I don’t get that at all from my reading of the note.

    It’s really creepy. I think the note writer is a male relative of the recipient. “You have no sex emotions” sounds to me like she wouldn’t have sex with him, hence “Be side’s I want nothing to do with incess” (“if you won’t sleep with me, I never actually wanted to sleep with you anyway”)

    And as for “try” another (woman) roommate. Yuck.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 4:09 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   FeRD bang

      Hey, c’mon now… you can’t just give up! That’s just how I was raised, and I’ve done my best to always remember that lesson.

      After all, I bet nearly all of us were told, at some point:
      “If at first you don’t suck seed, try, try again!”   :mrgreen:

      Apr 18, 2011 at 5:50 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   edjamacateme

      Insightful, Sarah. I agree.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 7:25 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Sarah: Pretty sure you nailed it, possibly with a side of “Your sneeky for leeding me on al this tiem”. You know, because it’s really her fault for making him have bad thoughts, and thus he has to put her in her place about incess.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 7:30 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Pylgrim

    I just want to commend the bravery of the submitter. God knows I wouldn’t have risked being caught taking a picture of the note by the perpetrator of this crime against reason.

    Also, I’m morbidly fascinated with that ornate capital D in “Day one”. It’s like seeing a tiny duckling emerge from a vatful of offal.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 5:49 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Nunavut Guy

      You need to move your ducks to a better nesting sight.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 6:41 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   Who passed out the Haterade?

      Pylgrim: Surely you jest… I mean, I’m sure he wasn’t sitting across the street in a lawn chair with a pair of binoculars and a huntin’ rifle or anything.

      More likely, he had a tree stand.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 7:36 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   se

    Why are too many commenters assuming it’s a guy and it’s his fault? I do think it’s a guy, but there is also the scenario where the roommate (she) (his cousin) climbs into his bed in the middle of the night (sneeky), he wakes up and pushes her out of bed (scorn womon), (nothing to due with incess).
    and he knew she was a whore when he let her move in (no sex emotion’s)
    He also changed the note to read find another roommate.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 7:58 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #22   se

    and to move away from the serious side, some snark.
    when I was growing up, the saying was:
    “incest is best when you put your cousin to the test”.
    for the record, I never had cousins that I knew of.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 8:16 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Really?

      There was a serious side?

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:50 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   madrugada

    I had to try and decipher this one because it’s so bizarre. Sarah, I think you are on the right track that it is a male – I shall refer to him as “Writer” and the female recipient of the note as “Addressee”.

    Here’s one interpretation:

    Writer will be there at 7, to try to catch up with one of Addressee’s other roommates (maybe to pick up his stuff from inside the apartment and avoid seeing Addressee, that abnarmal sneek?) Is Writer giving Addressee a heads-up so that she will not be there at 7pm, because he doesn’t want to see her?

    In the PS – Writer states that Addressee is not normal. She has no sex drive or interest in sex (at least not in having sex with Writer, hee hee), but Writer has known that all along.

    Addressee is just a scorned woman (presumably because of Writer’s rejection of her?) and now she is being sneaky, perhaps pursuing Writer’s brother – or sister? Or trying to mess Writer up with someone else that we, the readers, don’t know about)?

    Writer, stout fellow that he is, wants nothing to do with incest. Is Addressee now hitting on the writer’s brother – or sister? Or her own brother or sister? Who’s having incest with whom, here? Or does the writer not understand what incest means? Maybe he thinks that the same woman – looking at YOU here, Addressee – sleeping with 2 brothers is incestuous? Sorry, Writer, it’s more than a little tacky, if not just plain disgusting, but it’s not incest, unless she’s also related to the brothers, or they’re having a threesome.

    But then Writer snaps that “blood’s thicker than water.” Is he letting Addressee know that his (Writer’s) brother won’t be banging Addressee any time soon, because Writer’s Brother is loyal to him, not Addressee, or so Writer assumes.

    Innovation messagner – I have no flipping idea what the Writer is talking about here. That’s okay. I don’t think he does either. Immolation? Imitation? Incestification?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 8:21 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   Splint Chesthair

    Blood is thicker than water, but not semen.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 9:17 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Kara bang

    All I know is that if I lived in that building I would NOT be present at 7pm.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 9:19 am   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   Malomonster

      I’d be there with popcorn and a soda! ENTERTAINMENT

      Apr 20, 2011 at 4:23 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   Nope

    Wow, this has to be one of the greatest epic fail notes of all time. WTF is going on here? And what does “Innovation Messagner” have to do with the rest of the note?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 9:27 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   Canthz_B bang

    She’s going to try yet another roommate?

    District Attorneys really should be able to write better than this.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 10:28 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #28   Eric

    I love that this person somehow got “than” right amidst a note that resembled a 2nd grade english assignment.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 10:44 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   Luna (the other one)

      My 2nd grade daughter is offended that you would compare this note to her work. Her grammar and spelling are much better than this.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 12:07 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   The Elf

    Is anyone truly narmal?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 10:57 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   se

    Isn’t that an “a” after the “g” in messagaer?
    could the signature have meant “Innovation Massager” whatever the hell that may be..

    Apr 18, 2011 at 11:10 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   KJS

    Best. Postscript. Ever. Only in crazy land is the P.S. longer than the actual purpose of the note. This might be my favorite note of all time.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 12:14 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #32   Brianna

    This sounds like one of those guys who posts for ‘female roommate needed! Only $150/month!’ in an attempt to get a girl into their house and then convince them that sex is their duty.

    I came away with ‘I am putting up my ad again and trying for another girl. You won’t have sex with me, (which is strange as I tried holding you down, and cornering you, and watching TV naked while leering at you in a suggestive, lust-fueled manner and nothing worked!) therefore, you are obviously deficient, abnormal, and have no sex drive. I knew my roomate-for-sex scheme wouldn’t work, but you took advantage of my low low rent anyway and therefore are a sneaky bitch!

    I’m also pissed you seem to like my employed, bathed brother more than I am, but he’ll dump you because we’re kin and that’s totally logical!

    You told me to ‘go fuck myself’, but that sounds sort of incestuous, and I’m not down with that.

    I’ll be here at 7. Please have dinner ready!

    Apr 18, 2011 at 1:32 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   TickleMyBambo

      What? You have no sex emotions with me anymore? All because you go behind my back to have incess sex emotions with my twin brother, which I new from day one. I dont nothing to due with incess!! Your so sneeky! Scorn on you, womon!!

      Apr 18, 2011 at 4:16 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #33   Auto Title Loans

    There are hardly words to describe how hard it is to try and read this note. One can hope it’s from someone not native of the English language, but I have a sneaky suspicion that’s not the case. After all, what is Incess?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 1:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #33.1   se

      the opposite of excess

      Apr 18, 2011 at 1:54 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.2   Susannie

      Really? You don’t think OP meant incest?

      Apr 18, 2011 at 2:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.3   se

      @Susannie, I was being sarcastic with that answer to Auto Title person. If you haven’t read previous comments (what a concept!), then I direct your attention to #21 and #22 for my take on what “incess” means.
      If your comment was directed to Auto Title, then maybe you should have specified that in your comment

      Apr 18, 2011 at 3:01 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.4   Canthz_B bang

      Maybe so, se. But did you try and read the note, or just try to read it?

      Everyone knows you enter through an incess door and leave through an outcess door. That’s been true ever since the earth began spinning on its access. :lol:

      Apr 19, 2011 at 12:15 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #33.5   se

      Well CB, I can see how the note might be hard to read, but it’s not hard to try.

      Apr 19, 2011 at 6:03 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #34   Elemarth

    What is going on in this note? I can barely even come up with guesses. On top of all the weirdness, who would ever misspell “normal” as “narmal”?!

    Apr 18, 2011 at 2:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #34.1   The Elf

      Someone who isn’t.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 2:47 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #35   KST

    I did the whole Photoshop, flip image thing (just like on TV!) and it looks like it’s a first draft of the note we’re seeing. It doesn’t say “10:00pm,” I can only see “00″ which is probably the end of “7:00″. It does say “woman room mate.” That kind of makes the side that was posted even creepier.

    And yes, I have too much time on my hands. I am recovering from surgery and am so bloody bored I’ve resorted to doing crap like this.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 2:31 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   Susannie

    the “not normal” Incest part might imply children… A truly disturbing letter :(

    Apr 18, 2011 at 2:44 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   se

      Really? do you think that incest is ever normal?

      Apr 18, 2011 at 3:20 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.2   unsatisfied

      not narmally.

      Apr 18, 2011 at 3:35 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.3   Nunavut Guy

      Well,my mom is kinda cute……….

      Apr 18, 2011 at 8:08 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   Blork

    And yet, somehow, the author used “than” correctly.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 4:18 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Managed Hosting

    A good question, though, is why this was on the outside and not inside where it would be more private?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 5:48 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #39   kacky

    It looks like a southern accent, written phonetically. That leads me to believe it’s someone who had to leave school early because of un-addressed problems with dyslexia. I feel kind of sorry for them.

    Apr 18, 2011 at 7:00 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Jiu Jitsu Los Angeles

    This could be the best passive aggressive note of all time. The spelling, the context and placement just screams of it. But if this is supposed to be a roommate, then why the attack on the sex life?

    Apr 18, 2011 at 7:05 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   oi

    Huh?!

    Apr 19, 2011 at 12:06 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   Ali

    Not surprised at all that this is from Jacksonville. Half, if not more, of the population writes/acts like this.

    Apr 19, 2011 at 12:54 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   ScornWoman

    “innovative message” forever defined as: yellow lined paper held to a door by a nail

    Apr 19, 2011 at 1:15 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #44   Mick-Micki

    My take on this is…

    Basically, this is his ex-girlfriend. She called it off with him. He wants to pick up the things that he left at the apartment (toothbrush, underpants, t-shirts, bong). But the roommates are ignoring his knocks at the door. He is not getting in that door. No way Jose!

    He new that she was devoid of sex emotions. But he pressed the relationship. He could teach her to love. But he soon learned that she wanted sex…No intimacy. No kisses and hugs. No post-coital spooning. She has no sex emotions and definitely not loyal. She goes out with other guys. She flirts with his friends.

    From this, he surmised that she may be a little bit of a sociopath, but he new this going in. But he was intent on teaching her to love.

    The nail in the door *looking around* was the day he introduced her to his hot brother. His brother began receiving interesting phone calls from the girlfriend. Eventually, the girl tried to scam with his brother.
    His brother told him about the girl’s scamming. Blood’s thicker than water. Our dear writer, the genius, thought, “How dare his girlfriend (who is not related to him) attempt to have an inccessuous relationship with his brother? He could put up with the lack of intimacy, but he could not put up with incess.’

    He is a moral, upstanding young man. He wants no part of incess, but give the state of today’s youth, he probably partakes in some degree of excess.

    Apr 19, 2011 at 6:43 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #45   AngelDuzt

    Be back around 7 pm, going to try another English teacher. The previous one obviously didn’t succeed at teaching me grammar and spelling.

    I’m hoping his next college room mate isn’t as illiterate.

    Apr 20, 2011 at 8:45 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Kiki

    Shoot. I live in Jacksonville.

    I’m now debating moving.

    Apr 21, 2011 at 6:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #47   Tatterdemalion

    My guess on the background story: This is totally one of those guys who posts “female roommate” ads. In his head, people agree to a relationship with him by moving in.

    The roommate in question completely lacked “sex emotions” towards him.

    The “incess” remark is one of two things:

    a) She’s dating someone else, possibly her cousin. It’s not that odd for people to date their cousins – the extent of taboo on that varies from place to place. (Frankly it could just as easily be that she’s dating someone who this guy has decided is her cousin. He seems to have a little trouble with his hold on reality.)

    b) He’s related to her (not a brother or he wouldn’t think of her as “roommate”, again maybe a cousin or something) and has decided in his deep frustration that incest is sour grapes.

    Apr 21, 2011 at 8:58 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   humberthumbert

    TEAM INCESS

    Apr 22, 2011 at 7:22 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   Lily

    I would LOVE to see a graphologist’s analysis of this handwriting. Not that it would tell us anything that we don’t know, but it would still be interesting nonetheless!

    Apr 28, 2011 at 12:01 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   katscratch

    My vote goes for all-out, poo-flinging crazy.

    This is a splendid example of why Fark has a ‘Florida’ tag -the state seems to draw (or breed) people who aren’t within a loooong stone’s throw of normal, doesn’t it?

    (Good luck to the F State residents who *aren’t* in that category. I imagine you’ll be supplying PAN submissions about your neighbors for a long time to come….)

    May 3, 2011 at 11:14 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     

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