So, you were hoping to get an A for “asshole-like entitlement”?

May 4th, 2011 · 199 comments

Our submitter in North Dakota, an instructor at one of the state’s institutions of higher learning, found this note left behind by a student in one of her English Composition classes. “We had begun meeting in a computer lab two classes prior,” she writes, “something which had been announced at the beginning of the classes leading up to the room switch as well as on the syllabus.”

But you know, “nobody likes to have to dig your syllabus out.” That’s like, a total drag, dude!

[Prof. redacted],  I showed up to class today and no one was there. Where was class?!?! You need to make announcement when you are changing the location of the class!!! No one likes to have to dig your syllabus out every day or check their e-mail for your last minute changes. I DID show up today and you have to count my paper as ON TIME. Please email me with an explanation.

Seriously, kids today(!!!)

related: The “feeling of failing” debacle

extra credit: “In the Basement of the Ivory Tower,” by Professor X []

FILED UNDER: college life · confusion??? · exclamation-point happy!!!! · most popular notes of 2011 · North Dakota · spelling and grammar police · that's disrespectful

199 responses so far ↓

  • #1   UnclGhost

    Dear Student,

    My explanation is that you should read your syllabus.

    Prof. [Redacted]

    May 4, 2011 at 10:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   AuntyBron

      Dear student,
      I killed a tree so that everone in my classes (yes – this includes you) would know what to expect in my class, when all assignments are due and, yes, even where the class meets. If you’re too fucking lazy to check your syllabus, why are your parents wasting money sending your self-entitled ass to college?
      Professor Fed Up With Your Bullshit

      PS – Your paper is late, bitch.

      May 4, 2011 at 11:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.2   TickleMyBambo

      I pity the fool who fails to read his syllabus!

      May 4, 2011 at 11:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.3   Nope

      People read the syllabus? Hmm, learn something new everyday…

      May 5, 2011 at 9:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #1.4   bug

      might learn even more if you read your syllabi.

      May 7, 2011 at 6:48 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   Jaylemeux

    Mmm, I don’t have any sympathy for him if the switch was announced in two class sessions, but otherwise it really is unreasonable to expect anyone to keep checking the syllabus when nothing about the class has changed.

    May 4, 2011 at 11:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Luna (the other one)

      Regardless of whether the move was announced or not, checking the syllabus is not really an effort. I always keep mine in the front pocket of my class notebook and, yes, I check it every day. It takes 15 seconds. This is just another spoiled brat who doesn’t want to take responsibility for his own stupidity. I’d fail him just for being a dick.

      May 4, 2011 at 11:49 pm   rating: 91  small thumbs up

    • #2.2   Splint Chesthair

      Is it really unreasonable to expect students to make note of important information in the syllabus?

      I’d argue that is the most important thing you should learn at college: identify and organize important information!

      May 5, 2011 at 6:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.3   The Elf

      Yes, this one goes down as a life lesson. Check your syllabus and attend class next time.

      My favorite part is “you have to count my paper as on time”. She has to? Really? I might have been more sympathetic to an honest mistake before that whopper.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.4   oi

      He demanded an explanation!! From his teacher?! I really can’t comprehend that. I don’t know if there is any amount of self entitlement would make me do that. Teachers are like second to god almighty in Asian cultures. You bear the punishment first and even then if you are given a chance then and then you explain what had happened. Seriously! That’s bit too far but this is just unacceptable.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:29 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.5   RP

      Something DID change: the location of the class.

      You only have to keep checking the syllabus if you forget what’s in it. No one said the note writer couldn’t have made a note of the days the class meets in the other room somewhere they wouldn’t mind checking it, like on their phone.

      May 5, 2011 at 1:34 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.6   Sympathetic Prof

      If nobody else showed up, chances are the change was made pretty clear. Typical self-entitled brat, who is guaranteed not to apologize for the brattitude.

      May 5, 2011 at 4:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.7   [email protected]

      If he had a Trapper-Keeper, he would have a handy place to keep his syllabus so that it could be referred to when needed. They’re stylish too….

      May 5, 2011 at 5:25 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.8   Risha

      I used to read the syllabus once at the beginning of the semester, and WRITE DOWN any vitally important dates… like, say, when you start meeting in a different room. You don’t need to check it every class, but that’s just common sense.

      May 5, 2011 at 9:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.9   julia holcomb

      RTFM. That’s what it’s for.

      May 8, 2011 at 7:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.10   Another Redacted Professor

      The reason why we have them constantly check their syllabus is because they fail miserably in comprehension skills. We hope that upon reading the syllabus, oh say, [insert arbitrary number here] times, they might understand on the upteempth read that where it says on the syllabus that the paper is due on [insert date here], that’s it’s actually DUE on that date.

      “oh, I didn’t know it was due.”
      “It’s on the syllabus.”

      “Our rough draft was due today?”
      “It’s on the syllabus.”

      And don’t even get me started on the freshmen that think their papers are “perfectly fine.” Obviously, they don’t understand that:

      1) THEY’RE not grading themselves at the end of the semester, I am. So unless I say it’s perfectly fine, then it’s NOT perfectly fine.

      2) People pay ME to write. These students, on the other hand, pay for the honor of writing for ME. They can’t comprehend what that dynamic entails. The PROFESSOR, dear freshmen, teaches YOU. YOU, the “STUDENT”, are an academic n00b and should behave accordingly.

      May 13, 2011 at 1:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.11   oi

      @2.10 Ha ha I love this comment! Specifically, “1) THEY’RE not grading themselves at the end of the semester, I am. So unless I say it’s perfectly fine, then it’s NOT perfectly fine” part. So true!

      May 13, 2011 at 5:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #2.12   Another Redacted Professor

      thank you ^_^

      if only students all around the world realized that…

      May 13, 2011 at 10:20 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   katie_2256

    Underlining ‘did’ three times?


    May 4, 2011 at 11:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Ned Braden, from Slap Shot

      They teach you how to underline in college.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #3.2   Reggie Dunlop

      Not the f— scenes, they don’t.

      May 5, 2011 at 3:16 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   Quite Contrary

    “Please email me an explanation” is going to be my response to anything that is my fault.

    May 4, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   TickleMyBambo

      More like “Please email me an explanation as to why I’m such a fucking douchebag”.

      May 4, 2011 at 11:31 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   park rose

      I think Quite Contrary is quite right. I’m assuming college classes are 90 minutes plus. The student probably turned up to the wrong classroom with ten minutes or less of class left – otherwise he/she probably could have made it to the other class after checking the syllabus, or at admin right? The student then realised it was too late to hand in their assignment, decided to think laterally, shift the blame, and hopefully get their work accepted as ‘on time’. Not smooth enough yet, but I see a career in banking/politics ahead.

      May 5, 2011 at 6:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   Kara bang

      Agreed. This kid may not make it through second semester of Freshman year, but he’s already well-versed at reassigning blame.
      In the words of Leon Black from Curb, “Turn that shit around on em…topsy turvy that motha fu*ka!”

      May 5, 2011 at 12:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.4   RP

      @ParkRose – At the schools I went to, class times varied depending on how often you meet and the number of credit hours. A Mon-Wed-Fri class would meet for 50min while a Tues-Thurs would meet for 75min if it’s a 3 hour credit class.

      I’ve never heard of a college campus so large you can’t get across it in under an hour. Maybe 20min on a large campus but that’s still missing over half of the class.

      May 5, 2011 at 1:42 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   magilmer

    A major part of being a student is being able to follow instruction. Whether during class or as indicated in the syllabus, you should know what to expect. Or not. Then you can wonder WHERE IS EVERYONE? WHAT ARE THEY DOING WITHOUT ME? WHAT KIND OF JOKE IS THIS?

    May 4, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   A Fox

    Somebody else would have to grade this entitled brat’s paper. No way would I be able to grade it fairly.

    May 4, 2011 at 11:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   TickleMyBambo

      Well since it’s late.. There is no point to grading it at all.

      May 4, 2011 at 11:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   intheshadowz

    Dear Student,
    So you dug your syllabus out thus know where class was and chose not to show up anyway? Yeah, your paper is so not on time.
    Nice try.
    Your Professor

    May 4, 2011 at 11:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   TickleMyBambo

      “Request for explanation as to why you failed to read your syllabus: DENIED!”

      May 4, 2011 at 11:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   AuntyBron

      Oh, Tickle, I can think of SO-O-O many explanations I’d be happy to give that shithead. But this is a nice, clean family-oriented site and I’m pretty sure my mama (Rest her soul) would not approve of language like that.

      May 6, 2011 at 11:56 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.3   TickleMyBambo

      AuntyBron, you sure got a purrty mouth… I would love to see some colorful words flow outta it ; )

      May 7, 2011 at 4:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   Sesquipedalian

    A further 5% has been deducted for grammatical and punctuation errors in the note appended to this English Composition paper.

    May 4, 2011 at 11:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   The Elf

      Plus, the student clearly failed reading comprehension.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   Indie

    I love how s/he can make a demand such as “you HAVE to” … how about we leave that up to the person who’s already managed to pass college, eh?

    May 4, 2011 at 11:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Heythere

      yeah, who not only passed but most likely has 3 degrees

      May 5, 2011 at 2:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   katie

    I’m a forgetter, I would have had to put it on my calendar. Wait, I can’t remember, do they have calendars in college young lady?

    May 4, 2011 at 11:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   TickleMyBambo

      I had a reminder on my phone.. But I forgot to turn the alarm and ringer on. Oops!

      May 4, 2011 at 11:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   Laura

    When a professor takes the time to lay everything out so that even a child could follow it, I can muster no sympathy for the babies that don’t even make an effort. I stapled mine into the front of each notebook, checked it often, noted important dates with a highlighter. Easy. Part of going to college is to learn how to go to work. You have to learn responsibility somewhere.

    May 4, 2011 at 11:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   TickleMyBambo

    Dear Student,

    All this could have been avoided had you simply pulled out your syllabus to update yourself on any current changes. If by any chance you were unable to show up for my class the syllabus has my contact information so yourself, and the rest of the class, has a way of getting a hold of me in the event that class location and schedule had been changed. There is no excuse for you to not utilize the information provided to you. Your inability to read the syllabus is neither my fault nor my responsibility, thus your demands are invalid. I’m sorry, but since you were not in class to hand in your paper I have no choice but to give you an F for failure to turn in your assignment. Next time, please read your syllabus and show up for class.

    Professor (—)

    May 4, 2011 at 11:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   *snerk*

      Strike that “I’m sorry.” No one is sorry this student’s paper will be considered late.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.2   The Elf

      The student will be.

      May 5, 2011 at 9:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.3   AuntyBron

      I take issue with your phrasing, Tickle. IMHO your first sentence, instead of reading “…had you simply pulled out your syllabus…” should have been “… had you simply pulled your head out of your ass…”

      May 7, 2011 at 12:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #12.4   TickleMyBambo

      You are absolutely right, AuntyBron! But I’ve told and seen so many people pulling heads out of asses that it would be almost considered a fetish for some twisted minds out there. Better to be safe not having some creep fapping off to your choice of phrasing.

      May 7, 2011 at 5:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   snee

    dear asshole,


    May 4, 2011 at 11:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   mchz

    Dear Student,


    May 4, 2011 at 11:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   Danny

    Dear student:

    Everyone else in the class managed to show up at the correct location. Logic dictates that you are therefore the dumbest person in the class. The other students will thank you for setting the low end of the grading curve at “zero.” Don’t bother attending any of the remaining sessions.

    A. Prof.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Andrew

      A more-tactful version of this strategy is the one I take with my students. “If half the students misunderstood the instructions, I would take responsibility and admit that I should have explained it more clearly. If twenty students understand them and one student doesn’t, that says something.” I don’t know if it actually works in addressing the student’s concerns but it does quiet them down.

      May 5, 2011 at 6:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   Divvitar

    Dear Student:

    Your paper made excellent toilet paper, so I’m giving you a D-.

    Professor Redacted, PhD.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17   SweetT

    what’s that you say? you want an automatic ‘f’ for the semester? why, certainly! your wish is my command. :)

    May 5, 2011 at 12:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #18   lagne

    oh, for fuck’s sake.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #18.1   TKD

      Thank you lagne, I could not have said it better myself.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #19   krunchbang bang

    Dear Student,

    This is an email containing my official explanation for the change of venue…oh wait, I just remembered that you do not like to be bothered by having to check your email, so it really doesn’t matter does it?

    Your Pal,

    The Instructor


    I fucked your Dad.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:33 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   TickleMyBambo

      P.S. I give your dads performance a D- , His oral presentation needs more practice.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #20   Mary N

    Oh my-

    I foresee another nightmare tonight about not knowing where class is and realizing that a final exam is tomorrow. Thanks!

    And yes, I still have this nightmare 20 years after graduation.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   Splint Chesthair

      Oh man, I get those all the time. It’s not really an exam though, I’ll be walking the halls and realize I have Organic Chem or something and I’ll think to myself, “Oh my god, I haven’t been to that class in forever!” (because I haven’t)

      May 5, 2011 at 6:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.2   The Elf

      Count me in that one too. It’s a fear of failure dream, and the one about forgetting something crucial for a class (or forgetting about a class) is a classic way for that fear to be expressed. If you’re in your underwear at the time, that’s a bonus loss of respect dream.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.3   MOG

      My husband still has the “late for Chem final” night sweats, good to know he’s not alone!

      May 5, 2011 at 10:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.4   quatfaux

      Oh, man. Wandering around in my underwear and realizing that I haven’t attended a class in forever and the final is tomorrow is a familiar story for me. Now … if it only were a dream!

      May 5, 2011 at 10:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.5   Pam

      When I have those dreams I’m usually back in high school, not in college. There’s a class I’m failing, or I haven’t gone to all year, or I need to repeat so I can actually get my diploma, even though I’d supposedly graduated.

      I’m lucky, though. Nine times out of ten, in the middle of the dream I’ll suddenly remember, “Wait… I graduated from college. Why do I care if I have a high school diploma? What are they going to do, take my degree away?”

      May 5, 2011 at 4:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.6   Sarah

      @Pam I actually have a recurring dream in which I receive a call from my high school informing me that they discovered an error in their records and that I actually should not have been granted my high school diploma. Additionally, they’ve informed my colleges of the error and thus my degrees have been taken away, because my acceptance was always contingent on having earned a high school diploma. Fun times, I tell you!

      May 5, 2011 at 9:19 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.7   AuntyBron

      My weird dreams involve sharing a jacuzzi with my BFF and a corpse which we push out of our way whenever it drifts too near… or being chased throught an elementary school by a psychotic killer (which I don’t get at all – School was THAT bad).

      May 7, 2011 at 12:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.8   clumber

      Count me in for another with the recurring “OMFG OMFG I have a final in a class I had forgotten to go to all year!” nightmares. Sometimes they are college, sometimes high school, sometimes it isn’t clear which…. but that nightmare comes around at least once a quarter or so. Every single time I wake up with a start and covered in terror sweats.

      I wish i had a recurring dream more like AuntyB’s. None of mine have ever had a jacuzzi.

      May 12, 2011 at 11:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #20.9   emcd

      @sarah – I have had the missing class dreams for years AND the experience of requesting a copy of my HS diploma 20+ yrs later to find out THEY HAVE NONE ON FILE FOR ME – true story. Have I crossed the fine line bewteen dreams and reality….? Considering my HS years were a total nightmare personally (fled my senior year as an exchange student), it may be true.
      Is there a way to will jacuzzi dreams without wetting my bed?

      May 13, 2011 at 12:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #21   Pam

    OMG, how old must I be if I said that if the phrase “pull out your syllabus” was ever said when I was in college, it would sound like an obscene request? I was lucky to have a one-page schedule, which was usually in tatters by the 4 th week of the semester. I would love to know how this professor actually dealt with this student-of-the-year candidate!

    May 5, 2011 at 1:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #22   Canthz_B bang

    Why again should an emailed response be sent to someone who says they can’t be bothered to check their email?

    I’m missing something. How about just paying attention to what’s going on like the other students did?

    May 5, 2011 at 2:09 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #23   Canthz_B bang

    I’m failing your class because I have a short attention span, so I’ll take this opportunity on the occasion of your relocation of class on the day my paper was due to claim that my paper was done on time.

    That should buy me a couple of days to finish this crappy paper, right?

    May 5, 2011 at 2:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #24   Canthz_B bang

    Dear Student,

    Please do not drink and strive.

    May 5, 2011 at 2:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   TickleMyBambo

      And don’t strive to drink

      May 5, 2011 at 2:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #24.2   AuntyBron

      Be a designated striver – your friends will thank you.

      May 7, 2011 at 12:08 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #25   Ginger

    I teach high school and expect my students to check calendars, etc online on a regular basis so that they can show up for things outside of class, and lo and behold, they do it! Most of them are also capable of noting dates for an entire year on a calendar when their handbook is given to them in August. I wouldn’t bother to send an email with an “explanation”. Student gets an F on the paper for it being late, unless an email with the paper was sent (with a time stamp) before class time. Your butt is covered if the student has the nerve or brain power to take this to anyone higher than you, and if the parents call, well then that’s just sad because this is college. Honestly.

    May 5, 2011 at 2:26 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   iruleuruniverse

      A girl I used to work with at the front desk of a hotel had her DAD call our BOSS one time because he would not approve her time off to go home for Christmas. Our boss simply said “Your daughter is well past the age of 18 [we were in juniors in college] and needs to take responsibility for her own life and actions. I have nothing further to discuss with you. Good day, sir.” and hung up on him…

      I could not believe that she had her DADDY call to talk to her BOSS. REALLY?!

      May 5, 2011 at 7:26 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.2   Seanette

      And someone so immature she went wailing to Daddy to make her boss cave in to her sacred whims managed to keep her job, when there are a lot of ADULTS looking for work? Sad.

      May 5, 2011 at 10:01 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #25.3   Adrianne

      Although… to be fair (in case he’s just assuming that she asked her dad to call)… my father-in-law keeps trying to call for things like that. Called an apartment we were waiting on approval to rent… that’s before we learned we had to strictly instruct him to not get involved. Keeps wanting to call my boss, call his son’s boss, whenever we use work as an excuse for why we can’t (and don’t want to) take weeks off to spend time with him at short notice. So, the dad may just be like my father-in-law…

      Jun 3, 2011 at 8:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #26   Christine

    “dig You syllabus out”? Really? Really? A so-called “English Student” in a higher learning facility who is still having trouble with the difference between ‘you’ and ‘your’ – methinks it might be pointless grading his paper anyway!

    May 5, 2011 at 2:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   WMDKitty

      Might be English as a Second Language, judging by the grammar, spelling, and syntax.

      May 12, 2011 at 12:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #27   Kathy

    At least he didn’t have his mommy write the note. I work at a university and hear horror stories from professors about what helicopter parents do for their giant baby children. You would weep for the future if you knew.

    May 5, 2011 at 3:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   The Elf

      Aren’t those kids embarrassed? If my mother had ever called my professor to complain, I would have been mortified.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.2   Ndawg

      You said it, Kathy. I’m only adjunct — and only on campus one day per week! — yet have managed to see it all. Yes, the father of a student has come to my office to tell me why his daughter does not deserve a B.

      I’m pretty sure most students do not read the syllabus, yet I write one every fucking semester, because the school requires it. I’d surmise that a syllabus makes it easier for my department chair to explain to bitching parents why Sally is getting not acing her classes. To say nothing of the fact that useful information is contained in the syllabus, like a change in class location!

      May 5, 2011 at 2:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.3   Manuka

      You’re right, she doesn’t deserve a B if she can’t handle disputing a grade by herself. She should get no more than a C.

      Pisses me off how many kids expect an A for just showing up to class. Average effort is a C, people.

      May 6, 2011 at 2:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.4   AuntyBron

      If my mother ever called my professors it would have been to critique their disciplinary techniques. And she would have given the harder ones higher points.

      May 7, 2011 at 12:13 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.5   Pit Pat

      I love “giant baby children.” Reminds me of “Spirited Away.”

      May 7, 2011 at 6:24 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #27.6   Adrianne

      I’ll just add (like I said one string up) that at least some of those kids *are* embarrassed, are waiting for the day that mom finally leaves them the hell alone, but so long as she’s paying tuition, they’re not able to get her to stop calling them at 10pm to make sure they’re going to bed each night and calling their teachers to complain when they get bad grades. (I knew some students like that… they mostly stopped communicating with their parents post-graduation.) Sure, “pay your own way” sounds nice, but many/most schools won’t give the student individual financial aid when the parents have demonstrated willingness and ability to pay for the whole thing.

      Jun 3, 2011 at 8:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #28   Mrs.Beasley bang

    Is this what they mean by “The best defense is a great offense”? It ain’t working for this guy.

    I missed the very last of my final exams in college because I messed up just like this note writer. I clearly didn’t listen when the time of the exam was announced, and I didn’t check the posting on the classroom door, either. It was a major blunder, but I had a lot going on – I was getting married in two weeks.

    So when I showed up for the final at the usual class time of 10 a.m. and found the room dark and vacant, my gut twisted. I knew I’d messed up big time. A quick check of the schedule taped to the door confirmed that the final had been scheduled for 8 a.m.

    I called my prof in shambles and threw myself at her mercy. The dear old soul was incredibly sympathetic. She gave me directions to her home (mind you) and a time to show up, and I arrived as directed and wrote my final exam sitting at her kitchen table!

    She went above and beyond to help me amend my screw-up, but I doubt she’d have shown that kind of empathy had I left her a note like this ^ one.

    What a punk.

    May 5, 2011 at 4:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   Splint Chesthair

      That’s really the only way to handle something like this. Completely and utterly owning the fact that you shit the bed on this one.

      May 5, 2011 at 6:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.2   The Elf

      Exactly, Splint. Then you go to the professor with an apology, a completed paper, a promise to be on time (and in the right place) forevermore, a plea for forgiveness, and a hope for mercy.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.3   Layla

      I’m a TA, and my willingness to help students fix their screw-ups depends entirely on their attitude. If you ask for a second chance, viola! You get one! If you come at me in a rage, demanding a second chance… Sorry, you fail.

      May 5, 2011 at 9:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.4   Samantha

      Exactly – I don’t get where anyone gets off being entitled about things like this. I missed one of my exams by two days because I misread the exam schedule and went to the exam for section 001 instead of section 002. I e-mailed my prof ten minutes after the wrong exam and said that I had screwed up and would appreciate the chance to make up the exam if he would be kind enough to let me. He was, and I wrote the exam (in the 2 hours I had between two other exams because that was a convenient time for him) with a note at the end expressing my appreciation for his understanding. That was the first and only time I messed up like that and I certainly would have understood if he had said no!

      May 5, 2011 at 2:55 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.5   TippingCows

      Oh, I know where they learn it … their parents. I see this behavior a LOT. If their child isn’t doing perfectly, or got in trouble for something, the parent takes it personally and demands to have everything reversed. I am too stubborn to do that. We lose some customers/kids that way but the ones we do keep are kids we can teach responsibility to and after a year or so, the parents are gushing about their school work and organization skills getting better JUST from being taught discipline through their sport. Amazing!
      I would be hopping mad if I got a note like this. Even worse – getting it from the parent!

      May 5, 2011 at 5:03 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #28.6   Nikky

      Oooh, I had a good one last year. The day of my French final it was snowing, and had been almost the whole week (yay, Michigan). I checked the website for closings just to be sure since my boss had actually sent us all home early because the roads were getting so bad. And I saw my class listed so I didn’t go.

      A week later, I’m wondering why I haven’t gotten an email about a rescheduled test. So I email my professor. Turns out, the school closing notice had been for the day BEFORE my exam. And I was the only one dumb enough to screw it up (I blame my “leaving work early” euphoria). She let me retake it, luckily.

      May 7, 2011 at 12:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #29   Nunya

    It says they started meeting in the computer lab 2 classes prior.

    That’s a double fail.


    May 5, 2011 at 5:31 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.1   TKD

      Exactly what I was thinking as I read all these posts. Where was this punk for the last 5 classes? If they are so good that they don’t need to show up for the lecture then they should be capable of turning in a perfect paper. Anything less will be graded with extreme prejudice.

      I believe my “explaination” would be to e-mail a clip from Kindergarten Cop. You know, Arnold shouting “STOP WHINING!”

      Or maybe just:

      May 5, 2011 at 8:35 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.2   *snerk*

      And if the student had his/her finished paper the week before, why not e-mail it to the professor the day it was due, to make sure it was on time?

      May 5, 2011 at 9:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.3   RP

      This comment should have a thousand thumbs up. If she’d been attending class then at the worst she would have messed up that first session when nothing was due.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:05 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #29.4   Pit Pat

      RP, why do you think the student is female?

      May 7, 2011 at 6:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #30   Jabba

    I work at a college and this is the exact kind of attitude we see all the time. They all act like entitled divas.

    May 5, 2011 at 6:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.1   Nahhh bang

      It’s to be expected when they grow up receiving trophies and ribbons just for participating. Programs like “Success By Six” lead to “Sucks Ass by Sixteen.”

      Then again, Skippy the Note-Writer wouldn’t have even received the I-Showed-Up award.

      May 5, 2011 at 7:44 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.2   Canthz_B bang

      Agreed. No winners and no losers then why play the games or even keep score? The lesson to be learned by winning is that it feels good to accomplish something. The lesson to be learned from losing is that you’d better try harder next time to win something.
      Rewarding losers is ridiculous, and teaches nothing but entitlement. Everyone feels validated and all is well with the world.
      All notions developed and implemented by adults who lost in or couldn’t even play sports as kids I’ll bet. LOL

      I take solace in the belief that most recipients of “Participation Awards” someday look at that trophy and realize that they were once oh so proud of a “Consolation Prize”…and by then they know what consolation means.

      May 5, 2011 at 7:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.3   Really?

      I remember getting a participation ribbon. I saw right through it. I really hope those things are for the benefit of certain parents, because mine never made me feel any better about sucking at the long jump at track and field day.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:24 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.4   Canthz_B bang

      Agreed again, I think lots of kids see right though it. It’s probably mostly the parents who crow about what their kid brought home and they placed on the mantelpiece with pride.

      The kids know who won and who lost. You can tell your child he’s not a loser, but you can’t tell him he didn’t lose when he knows he didn’t win.

      May 5, 2011 at 8:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.5   *snerk*

      Soooo…… If the kids see through the participation awards and realize they don’t mean anything, then why do those same awards lead to entitled kids?

      May 5, 2011 at 9:05 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.6   Canthz_B bang

      Some, not all. Life ain’t always black or white. That’s why I could agree with both points of view above. Something to do with holding more than one concept in one’s mind at a time.
      There’s validation for the parents sometimes, and sometimes it’s wimpy kids who need validation. No discrepancy. Both are valid points, so I can agree with both.

      The central point being: “Rewarding losers is ridiculous, and teaches nothing but entitlement.” …even if the kids realize right away or later on it was all a lie. ;-)

      “You can tell your child he’s not a loser, but you can’t tell him he didn’t lose when he knows he didn’t win.”

      A few things in life are black and white. But I know my agreeing with someone may be disturbing.

      May 5, 2011 at 9:10 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.7   *snerk*

      Wait, what? I’m sorry–I thought we were supposed to hear one point of view and cling to it for life, despite all nuance or evidence to the contrary.

      You must be incorrect.

      [walks happily away, whistling in confidence that her view is the only right one]

      May 5, 2011 at 10:27 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #30.8   Canthz_B bang

      The fun of being a Libra is the ability to see things from more than one direction at the same time. To understand when two ways of approaching a subject are not mutually exclusive (because Libras exclude no ideas, we consider them and take them into account in our decision making process).
      Makes us flexible when we choose to be open-minded, and formidable when we choose to stick to our guns.

      But the choice is always ours. Ask any Libra or anyone who has ever argued with one of us. It’s not the subject that matters, but interest in the argument itself which rules. The side we take doesn’t matter to us, it’s about the chase…the exercise, if you will…it’s not about being right or wrong, and that’s what you are sadly failing to grasp. ;-)

      May 5, 2011 at 8:26 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #31   ArtH_D

    This is one of my students! It must be one of my students! I have at least 5 every semester with the exact same attitude, and read this note via email various times each semester. Kids today…

    May 5, 2011 at 8:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #32   Really?

    I’d email her with a link to this PAN, so the entitled little twat can learn what the general public thinks of her ridiculousness. And would certainly not accept her paper as on time, although when I went to college that simply meant losing one letter grade, which in this case I would find generous. This is just rudeness, and should not be rewarded.

    May 5, 2011 at 8:19 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #33   oi

    WOW. Just wow!
    I think if I had written this note during ANY year up to my graduate degree that would be like a notarized by supreme court judge guarantee to be degraded to two years down. And I am not even in my thirties.

    May 5, 2011 at 8:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #34   oi

    Dear student,
    I am sorry to let you know that you have failed my class for the lack of attention, lack of respect and lack of desire to learn. I advise you to complete these three basic, kinder-garden level prerequisites first if you want to pass ANY class.
    Sincerely yours,

    May 5, 2011 at 8:36 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #35   Junebug

    You’d think that when you were the *only* student to show up at the wrong place you might place a tiny bit of the blame on yourself and admit that maybe you missed something.

    My favorite story about working with college students happened when I was still in college. I was a teaching assistant in a biology class and was in charge of leading a separate discussion group and grading their home work. One guy in the class turned in his home work and it was obvious that he had copied it from his friend in the class. He had copied every blank word for word…including the name. The idiot had copied his friend’s name (a female friend no less) on his paper. I knew it was his because I recognized his handwriting. I handed it back and told that if he wanted credit next time he should at least try and get his own name right.

    May 5, 2011 at 8:58 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #35.1   Canthz_B bang

      Hey, I thought I was being graded on content in the body, not on my name. :-P

      May 5, 2011 at 9:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #35.2   notolaf

      My dad had a student turn in the first chapter of a textbook he had written as a paper. And her mother showed up in his office to argue the matter when he turned her in for plagiarism!

      May 6, 2011 at 4:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #35.3   AuntyBron

      “Ma’am, look here – this is the textbook chapter and this is your daughter’s paper. If she has the expertise to be the author of this textbook why the hell are you paying for her to take my class?”

      May 7, 2011 at 12:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #35.4   Pit Pat

      I had a sub-par student take my star student’s homework out of my mailbox, copy it, and then put them both back in my box. If he had copied from an average student, I might not have caught it, but he copied from the top student in a class of around 300. Very noticeable.

      May 7, 2011 at 6:33 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #36   dixiechick

    My last year teaching Elementary College Composition, I had a “student.” He was a pothead. The BAD kind of pothead. He missed three weeks of class (and two short papers) in a row, then finally showed up. I sat him down, explained that he was failing right here, right now. UNLESS… We drew up an agreement, which we both signed, that if he missed ONE MORE DAY of class without having a signed note from God, he was outta there.

    He showed up the next two classes. Then, ::poof:: When I emailed him to say, “Scott, you’ll want to drop my class, because you have an F per our agreement,” he emailed me back to say (and I swear I’m not making it up, it is branded on my mind), “If you’re pissed off because I missed class on Wednesday, bitch, that’s your problem. My girlfriend was sick and she’s more important to me than your stupid class.”

    That’s MY problem?! Kiddo, we seem to have a fundamental misunderstanding of how all this college stuff works….

    Blew my mind. Still does, 20 years later.

    May 5, 2011 at 9:02 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   Splint Chesthair

      I’m sure when he tells the story you are that bitch professor who failed him for “skipping a class”.

      May 5, 2011 at 11:07 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.2   RP

      Did you reply that you have no problem at all with failing his ass? In my mind even bothering to let him know he’d just failed was doing him a favor.

      Did he bother dropping the class or did he just take the F?

      May 5, 2011 at 2:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.3   Kristin

      There was email 20 years ago? I mean I know it existed, but did not realize it was regularly used on college campuses as early as 1991. I started college in 1999 and that was my first email address. I think a lot of people were the same?

      May 5, 2011 at 3:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.4   Sean Jungian

      We had e-mail and online registration when I was in college, 1989-1992.

      The internet started at universities, you know.

      May 5, 2011 at 7:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.5   TippingCows

      Al Gore University?

      May 6, 2011 at 2:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.6   The Elf

      “20″ might just be an approximate. Real answer might be 15, 18, etc. I went to college in the early/mid 90s and email was definitely alive and well on campus then. I’m sad to say that is “about 20 years ago”. Very sad.

      (Goes in corner and cries about age).

      May 6, 2011 at 7:37 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.7   Parker

      Internet wasn’t commercialized 20 years ago, moron.

      May 6, 2011 at 12:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.8   Splint Chesthair

      I had a compuserve email in 1992, but no one to email. Forever Alone.

      May 6, 2011 at 1:47 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.9   Manuka

      I had e-mail at college in 1990.

      May 6, 2011 at 2:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.10   dixiechick

      OK, it was 15 years ago, not 20. What can I say, I was feeling very old last night!

      @RP–Not only did he not drop the class (as I prayed he would), he continued to attend class only intermittently, never turned in a single (required) rough draft for any paper, failed my class with an audible thud, and had the gall to write me an email at the end of the semester to tell me what a stupid c*** I was and how I’d been prejudiced against him from the beginning because he’d written his first paper (finally) about legalizing pot. (Come ON! His topic was completely off-topic; and, could we be original here? He thought he was such a bad boy? Who doesn’t smoke weed at least a time or two in college?)

      He has (had?) a very distinctive last name. I’m tempted to interweb-stalk him and find out whatever happened to him. I suspect it wasn’t good.

      May 6, 2011 at 3:01 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.11   Alicia

      Is there a point when you can be the grown-up who realizes you were dealing with an immature asshole and should, after 15 years, let it the fuck go?

      May 7, 2011 at 2:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.12   Lara

      Seems to me she WAS the grownup. Damn, she’s talking about it on a forum that’s discussing experiences similar to hers, and she brings it up, and suddenly she “can’t let it the fuck go”?

      Hit a nerve or what?

      May 7, 2011 at 4:40 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.13   Alicia

      Sure, it hits a nerve for me to see that she wonders what he’s up to. Dismiss him as an ignorant jackass, and if anything like that happens again, use your right as a teacher to drop students from your courses.

      May 7, 2011 at 8:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.14   lagne

      What the hell’s wrong with wondering what he’s up to? If my job and passion were to help people learn, and I had a student who flat-out refused to learn and was also a totally irrational dick about it, it would stick in my mind, too.

      May 7, 2011 at 10:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #36.15   cyffermoon

      Um, if one of my students called me a bitch or a cunt, he would find himself in the Student Services office. There he would probably be advised he was getting an F, and to please get the fuck off campus permanently, kthxbye.

      May 12, 2011 at 9:22 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #37   unsatisfied

    Dear Student:

    I will provide an explanation as to why I moved the location of today’s class on my next syllabus.

    Fuck off,
    Prof. [Redacted]

    May 5, 2011 at 9:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #38   Inquizitive

    So, after saying that it’s too much trouble to check email, she wants an email explaining the change in location? I’m confused. Could someone email me an explanation?

    May 5, 2011 at 10:06 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #39   Deb Who

    Look around the room dearie…if you are the only one in the wrong room you can’t blame anyone but YOU. GROW UP.

    May 5, 2011 at 10:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #40   Laura

    Take the late penalty Buddy.

    May 5, 2011 at 10:42 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #41   Becca

    He should fail because of that email. That email is rife with punctuation errs and he just sounds like a raving douche. To even further kick a dead horse, how long does it take to read the syllabus? Not long. So that also makes him lazy. Another fact, if a teacher doesn’t show up for fifteen minutes to a class, you can leave and safely assume something happened.

    May 5, 2011 at 10:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #42   Helen

    Dear Student,
    Thank you for pointing out your inability to attend my lecture, as we have met in the new location two class sessions prior to the day your paper was due and I have announced the change of location in multiple classes prior to the change. As you discovered the rest of the class’ absence was due to a location change and not an illness on my part, logic states you were too lazy to walk to the appropriate classroom. Adding that to too lazy to read the syllabus, too lazy to attend class, and too lazy to check your grammar in writing a note to an English professor, I’d say you’ve failed the course. Since you’re also too lazy to check your email though, I doubt you’ll discover this until final grades are posted.

    A. Professor

    May 5, 2011 at 10:57 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #43   Joe Blow

    I’m not sure I ever actually read a syllabus throughout my entire time at college. I wouldn’t have even thought to check it for something like a classroom change, either.

    The main problem with this notewriter is that this apparently wasn’t the first day in the new location..

    May 5, 2011 at 11:04 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.1   Splint Chesthair

      Honestly, I don’t remember checking the syllabuses other than looking them over the first day and making a mental notes of important things. Most professors reminded you of important dates.

      But this, this is completely self-absorbed asshattery.

      May 5, 2011 at 11:15 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.2   The Elf

      How can you get through the class without reading the syllabus? I can understand not checking it all the time, but surely you read it when it was first passed out on the first day? I mean, in addition to lining out class policies and grading methods, it generally goes into detail about what will be taught when. I found that to be very useful for picking which class to skip…..

      May 5, 2011 at 11:16 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.3   Splint Chesthair

      I always scheduled block classes as best I could. I worked 3AM to 8AM, then scheduled 4 back to back to back to back classes 8-12, MWF, and one 3 hour long Thursday night class. No incentive to skip MWF as I was already up for work and big penalty to skip a once a week class. I also paid for my own tuition which, from my experience, seems to reduce incentive to skip classes as well.

      May 5, 2011 at 11:47 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.4   Ndawg

      I swear to god, PAN is making me smarter! I’ll be adding a quiz next semester. The subject of said quiz will be the syllabus! I’ll have that quiz be during the second class meeting. Maybe I’ll even warn students about that quiz by writing something about it in the syllabus.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.5   Grumpy Teacher McGrumperson

      Ndawg – that’s actually considered to be a really good part of helping students learn critical thinking and life skills in college. You put the important stuff in the syllabus, you make a note that it’s important stuff, you put a note in the syllabus that there will be a quiz on the syllabus, then you have a quiz or graded discussion on the syllabus.

      It’s not meant to be done in a “gotcha” sort of way, because that just makes students (rightfully) defensive. Just in an explanatory, this is why you read the instructions sort of lesson.

      May 6, 2011 at 10:48 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #43.6   TheAutisticStepmom bang

      I’m a senior at a major university, and I’d say about 75% of my courses have had a quiz on the syllabus. It usually goes into the participation grade.

      May 6, 2011 at 3:17 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #44   LUZKNDIA

    I think communication is a two way street… I understand if the teacher wants students to read their syllabus but they can also dedicate 5 minutes of their time on the first class just in case anybody has any questions or concerns. It did happen something really unusual to me once, we were asked to put our signature on the syllabus and got a copy of it, it was a 3 page sort of contract, then we got what we thought it was a copy of the syllabus as an attachment on an e mail. I am sure I was not the only one who look through it briefly and not nit-picking, for our surprise there was a very important change in there that said we could not fail any assignments. But of course we only found out about it when somebody failed one…
    It is ok if you change the rules but you can not be too clear about it, right? each part can be lazy, the one making the rules and the one who should be following the rules

    May 5, 2011 at 11:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #44.1   Splint Chesthair

      Well, if you signed an agreement and changes were made after you signed it, you have a legitimate gripe there. Hope you’re not talking about law school.

      But practically, “you cannot fail an assignment” doesn’t seem like that huge of a restriction. I was an alcoholic pothead in college and I managed not to fail anything including nucleophilicity and basicity!

      May 5, 2011 at 11:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #44.2   The Elf

      Lesson #1 should be: Don’t sign anything without reading it first.

      You have a point that the change wasn’t called out. That’s a failure in communication. However, this particular case wasn’t like that. The room change was on the syllabus, and we have nothing to indicate that it was a revised syllabus.

      Count me in the camp that thinks “not failing anything” should be damn near self-explanatory.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #44.3   RP

      None of y’all signed the version of the agreement that said you couldn’t fail anything. I’d say the teacher was wrong for not telling you there was a change to it.

      In every class I’ve been it, even in graduate school, the teachers took time in the first class to go over the syllabus and part of that included how *changes* to the syllabus are handled. The original agreement should have at least included a part about how syllabus changes would be communicated to you.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #45   Eric

    Wow, there you go modern society. Take the fear of failure out of children, and they become sociopathic self-entitled little pricks who think they are on the same level as their superiors.

    May 5, 2011 at 12:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.1   Splint Chesthair

      I had to teach this to my daughter. She was complaining because her boss yelled at her for calling off. I asked why and she said, “My friend’s boyfriend of 2 years just dumped her!”

      I literally laughed because she was so so serious. I had to say, “Oh honey, that’s…that’s not a real thing. You don’t get to call off work for that.”

      May 5, 2011 at 2:32 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.2   The Elf

      Well, you do get to call off work for that. You just tell your boss that it is diarrhea.

      May 5, 2011 at 2:36 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #45.3   WMDKitty

      Better, call in with explosive diarrhea. They WILL tell you to stay home.

      May 12, 2011 at 12:20 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #46   Car Title Loans

    Something tells me this person didn’t go to class all semester. What do you think the professor’s response e-mail said?

    May 5, 2011 at 12:31 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #46.1   lagne

      I think the professor asked the student, “If a tree falls in the forest and nobody’s there to hear it, is a person posting ads in the comments section while trying real hard to make it relevent still annoying?”

      And I think the student said – (chortle of joy) – YES!

      May 6, 2011 at 3:18 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #46.2   FeRD bang

      Agreed, but all the same you have to be just a little impressed by how hard some of them work to seem relevant. It’s getting so it’s sometimes difficult to be sure, at first glance, that you’re looking at an ad posting!

      IOW, while I suspect the function is ultimately asymptotic, they’re getting scarily close to achieving xkcd #810!

      May 6, 2011 at 8:41 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #47   poorscholar

    That student sounds like his mother.

    May 5, 2011 at 1:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #48   That Teacher

    Oh yes . I have come across this many a time in my years of teaching. Especially at a community college, where many students just see it as something to be “gotten through” and not actually a chance to learn. My mentor always told me, “Make sure your students know that their self created emergency isn’t your problem.” I give them a syllabus. I post the syllabus on line. I send out email reminders of important things like tests. I write on the whiteboard important dates. I still have people who miss and then expect me to care. I don’t. And I sleep just fine. :)

    May 5, 2011 at 2:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #49   Daniel

    The student should have known better … times like this is when you go back home, send an email claiming your grandmother died, and go back to sleep.

    May 5, 2011 at 3:06 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #49.1   Risha

      Just be sure to change it to your mom after the first two times.

      May 5, 2011 at 9:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #49.2   Ana

      for the death excuse to fly at my university they require a certificate of death (so students can’t use that unless it is true).

      May 5, 2011 at 11:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #49.3   Nunavut Guy

      I hope they don’t require good grammar and punctuation.

      May 7, 2011 at 7:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #50   lagne

    I’m one of those professional-student types.. spent lots of time in school and currently in school again. It makes me absolutely crazy when students treat teachers like their employees. OH my god, it brings out the cusser in me like none other. “I did this, so you HAVE to do this.” Bull. Fucking. SHIT. This is why I’m not a teacher; I don’t know how teachers in this position don’t just go all “The fuck? – GET THE FUCK OFF MY PLANET IMMEDIATELY” on snotty little entitled brat students like this one.

    *kicking soapbox to the side and lighting it on fire, yelling “FUCK!!” one more time because, hey, what’s one more time?*

    May 6, 2011 at 1:55 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #51   aristophanes68

    Not checking the syllabus is less problematic to me than the fact that the room change was announced in class repeatedly (and all the other students seem to have picked up on it). I don’t expect students to check their syllabi for things like classroom changes, so I make sure to announce them for at least a week afterward.

    I have the opposite problem with syllabi–my students print them out and carry them around, but never double-check to make sure they’re still up-to-date. So when there’s a mistake or a change, they’re using out-of-date information.

    May 6, 2011 at 10:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #52   factorblank

    I once missed the first day of class. (I think I had to work that day, but had my schedule changed for the following weeks.) I had no idea the class was going to move to a different room starting the next week, so when I showed up and was the only one there I thought I was early.

    In walks a the cutest red-haired girl I’ve ever seen. We start to talk and ended up dating. We’ve been married for ten years now! (After about 15 minutes we figured out the class was next door.)

    As a side-note, this was a non-credit course as part of an internship but I actually did learn quite a bit when we finally figured out where the class was.

    May 6, 2011 at 11:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.1   oi

      Same kind of thing happened to me. It was a laboratory class and they had changed the lab. I had missed the first class. I half heartedly tried to ask admin but she did not know either she tried to sent me on wild goose chase. But I simply went home and got home before my dad who had dropped me to my class. He was incredulous that I missed the class because nobody was there! I was like well I asked them they did not know either what else I could do? I did not leave any explanation demanding notes though. I ended up getting A- because of my absence even though I had A and A+ in assignments and homework.

      May 6, 2011 at 12:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.2   oi

      Yeah I have missed lots first classes. All they do is give you copy of syllabus anyway which you can get later too. Why waste sleep?

      May 6, 2011 at 12:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.3   pony girl

      A lot of schools are dropping students from classes that they miss on the first day, no excuses.
      I always wondered about that no excuses, though.
      Really? So, if I am on my way to class and someone mugs me and I end up in the hospital you’re going to drop me?

      May 6, 2011 at 10:52 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.4   park rose

      I nearly always teach a first class. Sometimes we finish early, but not often. I think, well, if the students turned up and I turned up, we may as well get on with it. pony girl, I don’t agree with a totally inflexible “no excuses” policy either.

      May 8, 2011 at 1:26 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #52.5   Dave C

      Not only teach first class — the Engineering Mechanics department where I did my undergrad was notorious for posting on the department bulletin board a homework assignment *due* the first day of class.

      May 13, 2011 at 11:49 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #53   oi

    Yeah this person sounds like he never attended any class nor ever talked to his classmates. I am the lost planet of the announcement universe and it never happened to me because in each and every class there are always humanatarian guys who would make sure absent minded people like me would know. Once I had mentioned to somebody that I want to take this particular class. I had all prerequisites but I had missed the sign up deadline. Turned out he already had signed me up because he knew 1. I would miss the deadline 2. I would have all the qualifications anyway. All I had to do was pay for it. I missed the first class because I did not know at that time, he came by after the class and told me! And this is not the only example, once I had a friend who called me when I was out of town to fill up my exam appearing forms or something.
    What I am trying to say here is that there is always one time/ announcement messiah in any class who would keep you up to date if you simply talk to them in class.

    May 6, 2011 at 11:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #53.1   park rose

      One step further, one of my colleagues has students grouped into threes, and they are responsible for one another. If one is absent, those present get copies for him or her. If a test is announced, it is the job of the members in the group to inform the missing student and so on. It’s an efficient system to put into place if you remember to do it at the start of the semester, and if all students are in a a class.

      With Moodle and University intranets now, that can all be posted by the professor, too, but there are always little bits and pieces that only occur in class.

      May 8, 2011 at 1:32 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #53.2   lagne

      I was in a class with a similar system a few years ago, except the onus was reversed: in our groups of three, the absent classmate was responsible for contacting one of the other two for any missed notes, info, etc. Either way you work it, it’s a good system.

      May 8, 2011 at 1:52 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #54   Trevor

    pretty sure i had this teacher at NDSU I never had trouble knowing where class was. Getting there on the other hand……

    May 6, 2011 at 12:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #55   TheAutisticStepmom bang

    This made me angry enough to register an account! I’m a senior at a major university, and I see this shit ALL.OF.THE.DAMN.TIME. These little entitled assholes whose parents are paying for their education, so they don’t give a shit. These same kids are the ones who brag about not showing up or paying attention, because, Hell, it’s not their own money they’re wasting.

    Don’t even get me started on the dick kitchens that waltz in late 20 or 30 minutes into class every day and make tons of noise getting prepared to surf the Internet the whole time they are there, or the ones that text the whole class *click, click, click* as I’m trying to, you know, LISTEN TO THE LECTURE! *grrrr* The worst is the completely disrespectful, end of class “backpack shuffle”. Five minutes until the end of class, when the professor is STILL TALKING, and suddenly 90% of the class needs to shuffle their papers and zip their backpacks up all at the same time.

    May 6, 2011 at 3:22 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   lagne

      Oh my gosh, I totally feel you on the “end of class backpack shuffle.” Last semester, one of my classes was taught by the assistant director of our program – a very kind, mild-mannered, passionate teacher – and people STILL pulled that crap. I was like “Really? Bad enough to do it to a teacher.. but the assistant freakin director of the program??”

      If I were a teacher, I think my only absolute stipulations (other than show up and do your work) would be 1) get there on time; 2) pack up while I’m still talking and I’m marking you absent for the day. Give me shit about it and I’ll flunk you. Go ahead and tell me I can’t.

      May 6, 2011 at 6:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.2   Pit Pat

      My parents paid for my undergraduate education, I DID give a shit, and I did NOT feel entitled. Just cause *you’re* paying your (sanctimonious) way doesn’t mean anyone whose parents are paying is an asshole.

      May 7, 2011 at 6:45 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.3   TheAutisticStepmom bang

      I didn’t mean that all students whose parents are paying are entitled assholes. I meant that all entitled assholes likely are having their education paid for.

      May 7, 2011 at 7:44 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.4   lauren

      I know, that “backpack shuffle” is SO rude. When I was in college, I would sit and listen until we were dismissed by the prof. (And I’d glare at all the other kids who had tuned out and started making a ton of noise. Ugh, so rude.)

      May 8, 2011 at 11:53 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #55.5   TickleMyBambo

      Nothing is more rude then people texting or IMing each other IN THE SAME CLASSROOM while sitting next to one another. And they weren’t even quiet about it, oh no, they would laugh and whisper to each other while everyone else (and the teacher) glares at them for their rudeness. Seriously? Why even bother with the texting or IM if you’re just going to whisper to each other anyways? Then again, why bother goign to class if you’re not going to pay any attention or show the teacher some much due respect. Make so fucking sense. Add that with the loud and annoying “backpack shuffle” and you have yourself backpack shuffle texting rude people conga…

      May 8, 2011 at 10:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #56   somebody who used to care

    Well, I stopped reading if your comment didn’t rate at least 40 thumbs up. And I’ve had a large bottle of wine, fifteen years of teaching, and a stupid Phd in somethingor other.

    I got a lot of emails like this. Now, since I buy houses and rent them out to people who have better credit ratings than this blowhole, I am writing a novel, shopping, getting pedicures, and not grading 60 comp papers every other weekend and feeling guilty if I didn’t teach them something with my comments I am much, much happier.

    And I even have a novel half written, and robin’s egg blue toenails.

    So. Stu who is in self entitled a-hat email? Gets an F. Because I’m cool like dat.

    Me? I get a nother glass of wine.

    And if my comment doesn’t get 60 or so thumbs up?

    I don’t even care.

    May 6, 2011 at 8:09 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #57   Nunavut Guy

    Can I use penisilli to cure my broken syllabus?

    May 7, 2011 at 7:54 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #58   Ali

    I can sort of understand someone being upset that they missed their class, especially when they did actually do the work. But, what a fucking attitude. The “email me with an explanation” part is just.. what the fuck. So, you KNOW that there’s a good possibility that the “explanation” is in the syllabus, you just mentioned that you have one, and you’re STILL gonna demand your professor to do something? I’d be expecting an F for the semester if I was her/him.

    May 7, 2011 at 5:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #59   lauren

    LOL at “Please email me with an explanation”. What a little douche. I teach undergraduate science labs and would immediately dock that kid points for being a self-righteous little smartass.

    May 8, 2011 at 11:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #59.1   WMDKitty

      IDK, it’s not unreasonable to ask for an explanation.

      But the way this jerk did it? Not cool.

      May 12, 2011 at 12:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #60   TickleMyBambo

    I personally would email this response to him:

    May 8, 2011 at 10:28 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #61   Ranon

    Unfuckingacceptable! This is why you teachyour children well and not leave them to be spoilt brats. I bet you he’s fat and American too.

    May 9, 2011 at 12:29 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #61.1   TKD

      -for FUCK SAKES
      We Overweight Americans have spent decades building a stereotype of being a jovial, mild-mannered and content-with-ourselves group of people. We graciously accept being the but of your lame fat jokes. Your unwarranted linkage of the OA people to the self-centered douchebags is what is unfuckingacceptable! I suggest that you issue an immediate retraction Ranon. Otherwise your next meal not prepared by an emaciated chef may just contain a “little something extra”. Bad Stereotype You. ;-)

      May 9, 2011 at 1:54 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #62   Canthz_B bang

    Why didn’t he just send the paper on-line?

    My wife’s history professor has her students do their tests on-line, some multiple choice and a few essay questions.

    I’m My wife is getting an “A” in US History, WWII to Present!!
    “She” wrote a kick-ass research paper too. ;-)

    Modern education rocks!!

    May 10, 2011 at 12:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #63   park rose

    As the great Elvis Costello once said, Absences will happen. We all hit and run. . . . I’d include the rest, but the official lyrics don’t make as much sense as my mondegreeen.

    May 10, 2011 at 1:50 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #64   Another Redacted Professor

    On behalf of freshman comp. instructors everywhere, I suggest you all give us medals/hire us shrinks/buy us a beer whenever you come across any of us. Now you truly know the pain that comp. instructors face on a daily basis. At least this kid, I presume, managed to spell their name right.

    May 13, 2011 at 2:17 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #64.1   overworked_taa

      I commend you. Honestly. I am teaching students in a 300-level course. They are mostly seniors and cannot write a legible essay. Over the course of the semester, I have helped them and have seen them grow leaps and bounds. No one has ever taught them how to write properly or what plagiarism is! They didn’t know how to insert quotations and had no idea when to capitalize anything! I wish they would have gone through a far better comp class like I did when I was a freshman.

      May 13, 2011 at 8:53 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #64.2   Another Redacted Professor

      Haha thanks, overworked! I guess I’m lucky that I’m not teaching your section, then, because as seniors…wow…there are no words to describe the frustration you must feel. At least the freshmen I encounter are, you know, freshmen, so I give them a bit of leeway. “Oh, you’re supposed to cite things in the essay?” Me, “Yes, otherwise your paper is just ten pages worth of plagiarism.” Student, “But I thought that was what the Works Cited page is for….”

      May 13, 2011 at 10:10 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #65   alicia

    the part i love is the demand for an e-mailed explanation… like the student calls the shots or something! lmao

    May 13, 2011 at 5:30 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #66   overworked_taa

    What kills me is that one of my students from this semester could have written this. For example, I had one who stood outside my office and swore and stomped his feet because my door was closed. I didn’t know what was going on outside because my door was shut. I didn’t have office hours for another 2 hours. Finally, I opened the door after he called me a “bitch” and then boom, instant humiliation. Poor kid was so confused.

    I think he would do this.

    What’s funny is that ONCE AGAIN – it’s on the syllabus! And where is the syllabus? Online. They check their grades daily and yet don’t bother to check the syllabus!

    May 13, 2011 at 8:50 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #66.1   Another Redacted Professor

      Wow. That is horrible and terribly uncalled for. I had this one kid show up to class on peer review day without a draft to be peer reviewed. Him, “Oh, haha, I don’t have anything because…haha…I didn’t do it.” Me, “You can go home then because I have nothing for you to do.” Him, “Seriously?” Me, “Yes. There is no point in you being here today.” Him, “For real?” Me, “Yes. LEAVE.”

      I think the main problem is the lack of accountability. They think it’s ok to slack off. Yeah, sure, it’s ok…if you want an F. You want a good grade in my class? Show me that you actually care about what you write, that you make the effort to meet the deadlines, work on extensive revisions for your papers, show up to class and be prepared to participate in class discussions. If I wanted to run a day care, I would have stopped with an Associates degree.

      May 13, 2011 at 10:07 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #66.2   Canthz_B bang

      Interesting how higher degrees can cause a higher degree of condescension towards those with lesser degrees…as if they are lesser people…isn’t it?
      As if a piece of paper actually makes one more intelligent rather than just better educated.

      Maybe people who want to run day cares have just always aspired to care for small children. Call it a calling, but some are probably Mensa members.

      And no, I may not have wanted to participate in discussions in your class…maybe I was shy and sucked at public speaking, but wrote excellent papers and aced all of your exams (filling my Bluebook with pearls of wisdom and insight), proving that I’d learned the course of study.

      No “A” grade for learning all of what you teach just because I did so in silence? Dumb…because I attended school to learn, not teach. Paid tuition so you could talk and I could listen to you. Learn what you have to offer (because you are better educated than your students, but not necessarily more intelligent than they are despite their current lack of advanced degrees), not to listen to the other students, whom I think we’re safe in assuming have less understanding of and knowledge about your subject matter than you have. Besides, I could listen to and debate with their crap in the student center or cafeteria for free.

      Socrates had all day, you have far less time with your students than he.
      I’m oh so glad “Class Participation” wasn’t part of the grading process when I went to school.

      May 14, 2011 at 2:00 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #66.3   Another Redacted Professor

      Interesting how people love to jump to conclusions, isn’t it? I apologize if you took my comment as a sarcastic remark and happened to take it personally. As someone who went through the community college system and strives to teach at the cc-level one day, I would never take what you obviously presumed to be a cheap jab at the cc population. I LITERALLY meant that if I were to go into day care, I would have stopped at an A.A. (I think that’s where you can get the credits necessary for early education?) And unless you were the student I had last semester (who I was talking about in my post), I have no idea why you’d be so offended by my comment that it made you overcome with this unrelenting desire to lash out at someone who you don’t know at all (nor their true intentions).

      May 15, 2011 at 12:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #66.4   Canthz_B bang

      Nothing you or I said applied to me personally (abstract argument, Professor, unless you jump to conclusions), but it will apply to some…people being a diverse sort and not one-size-fits-all, or had you not considered that?
      Sounds more like you were pissed-off about learning that education does not equal intelligence, now that’s more telling on the personal front.
      I LITERALLY meant why should you stop at an A.A. if you want to go into day care? Why would you stop at an AA degree to teach children unless you were aiming for bare minimum qualification? In it for the money?
      You could do so much more for the children with a more advanced degree…if you were one of those people with advanced degrees that really care about children. After all, you may be able to get a teaching job with an Associates, but if you cared about being a teacher, you’d get more. How does that differ from you? Consider those who may be in day care to make ends meet as they pursue advanced degrees to work in anything from early childhood development through adult education.
      You never made ends meet by tutoring or teaching the illiterate to read? Lots of real teachers would answer “yes”…no, I’m not a disgruntled teacher. In fact, you couldn’t pay me enough to stand at the front of a classroom, so I do respect what you do. I just ask that you respect the rest of your profession… and climb off your high horse.
      Or are those with Doctorate degrees who choose to work in elementary schools as far below you as day care workers?

      It was more than obvious that you hold yourself above those who’ve chosen the career path of early childhood education, and no, I’m not one of them, but I object to your arrogance. Just that teaching the youngest is just as important as teaching the about-to-head-off-into-the-worlds and final educators are no more important than the first educators…so get over yourself, Prof I’mallthat.

      “Show me that you actually care about what you write, that you make the effort to meet the deadlines, work on extensive revisions for your papers, show up to class and be prepared to participate in class discussions. If I wanted to run a day care, I would have stopped with an Associates degree.”

      You clearly said that if your students didn’t care to apply themselves they may as well be children and you may as well be a babysitter.
      That slacking students are, in effect, wasting the time you spent obtaining your advanced degree…for which I commend you BTW, just don’t think it MAKES you…it doesn’t.

      No way to know your true intentions by reading your words on the internet unless you can articulate your meaning clearly. Your comments reminded me of far too many arrogant Profs, and you ended by insulting some really hardworking people. I don’t need to know you or your true intentions to know you’re a stuck-up prig on that particular front.
      Not to worry, you’re not alone so don’t take that too personally. Just something that happens to some people once they think they’ve “made it”.

      Noticed how you addressed the least of what I had to say though.

      Clever diversion. But not fooling anyone, because the core of what I had to say was about the value of class participation and its validity as a grading point of any sort. What does it measure, if anything, about what a student has learned about the subject matter being taught? How does NOT speaking in class show a LACK of comprehension? Show proof of that and I will bow to you.

      Answer those questions satisfactorily, and I will concede with bells on, there was nothing “unrelenting” about my singular response to your post, but I honestly don’t think students should have class participation as a part of their grade. You can use it when they ask you for a recommendation for a job, but not to measure how well they mastered the subject you were asked to teach them. I don’t think you should use an invalid measure in the grading process. There are far too many other reasons to explain lack of participation other than lack of comprehension of the subject matter. Maybe the kid (young person) stutters. Maybe the kid is afraid of confrontation. Maybe the kid is afraid of being stereotyped as a know-it-all or a dumbass. Maybe the kid would just rather not be very vocal.
      Class participation is much more a measure of a student’s personality than of their subject knowledge, and grades should not be personality-based. Where’s the logic in giving a “C” student a “B” because of a large amount of class participation (ooh, you get an extra 5 points for speaking out), and giving an “A” student a “B” because of a lack of class participation (aw, didn’t hear from you this semester, that’s going to cost you 5 points)? It’s about LEARNING, not social skills (unless it’s a class about learning social skills). Is that so hard?

      I know you can focus on the point of a matter, because you have more than an Associates degree (or maybe you got extra points for class participation to push you over the top).

      Grading of your response?:

      Addressing key points…F
      Participation in discussion…A

      Cumulative grade: C

      And just because I’ve seen it too often and have been waiting for years to say it:

      “You can do better work.” For example, address the “Socratic Method” ;-)

      May 16, 2011 at 1:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #66.5   almosttenured

      Hi, I work at the equivalent of a CC, and I wouldn’t change that for the world. AND, I have kids in daycare, so I have the HIGHEST amount of respect for their teachers. Highest. I think their jobs are much harder than mine, and they do it with spirit, intelligence, and caring for each individual kid. They’re awesome. Anyway, I completely agree that degrees don’t equal intelligence.

      I just wanted to defend the OP a little bit and say that, at least in my state, one reason you’d stop with an AA if you wanted to work at a daycare is that you would not get *hired* with a higher degree. Education is weird like that. I have a friend who has a Ph.D. in a science field (we are desperate for science teachers here) and who decided she wanted to teach high school. She went back to school to get the education credits she needed, got certified, had awesome recommendations from her student teaching, had three interviews, and…no job. Why? She was “overqualified.” It’s ridiculous, but there you have it.

      So there ARE reasons, other than snobbery, to make that statement.

      As for class participation, most of my colleagues make it a small portion of the grade. It’s mainly an incentive for them to avoid distracting behaviors–showing up late, talking/texting, etc., and to reward those who participate. Participation can mean many things in our classes–for some faculty, it means just listening actively. In my classes, you won’t really be harmed for lack of participation, but if you are on the border of the next-higher grade, I might bump you up if you’ve contributed to the class.

      Ok, that’s all.

      May 27, 2011 at 9:14 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #67   lagne

    Dismissive of daycare as beneath you, and by extension, dismissive of degrees required to work in daycare. Can’t really explain that away. You might’ve done better to say, “If I wanted to babysit forever, I would’ve stayed a fifteen-year-old girl.”

    May 16, 2011 at 2:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up


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