Need another reason to skip the tanning bed?

June 1st, 2011 · 120 comments

Well, besides that whole skin cancer thing, there’s the fact that tanning booths — like  thrift-store fitting rooms — seem to bring out the animal in everyone. And that’s probably not the kind of “golden glow” you were aiming for, right?

Exhibit A) From Margo in Indiana:

Health Notice Toilet Issues The Tanning Room is not a Restroom!  It is extremely dangerous for A Total Tan employees to clean up trash cans and under rugs that people have used instead of the public toilet. This will no longer be tolerated!  A Total Tan has a computer record of everyone using each tanning room. In the future, using the tanning room as a toilet will not be tolerated. This will be very embarrassing to you!  It is not embarrassing for us to restart your bed if you need to stop before or during your session. Simply put on your clothes and ask the employee to stop your session.

Exhibit B) From Lisa in Ohio, an ominous threat indeed:

These cans are for trash only. We inspect between each visit. For everything else we have bathrooms. Violators will have their tanning rights terminated.

Exhibit C) From Emily in England:

NOTICE  We have a toilet for your convenience.  Persons found urinating in the bins will barred from these premises.

Exhibit D) From Ann in Arkansas:

Use our bathroom facilities! This is not the wilderness.

And Exhibit E) From an anonymous fake-baker in Louisiana:

The trash can is not a toilet. For those of you who have not 'peed' in it, Thanks! For the one who did; What were you thinking? Tabatha

related: When nature calls

extra credit: GTK is the new GTL

FILED UNDER: hygiene · most popular notes of 2011 · piss · that's disgusting · that's trashy · that's unsanitary


120 responses so far ↓

  • #1   beerwad

    It won’t be tolerated NOW. But it was tolerated before, apparently.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:32 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   Jesse

    Is this really a problem?

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:36 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Nikki

      Yes, disgusting as it is… Peeing in trash cans (sometimes MUCH worse) is fairly common in tanning salons. People get their clothes off, realize they have to pee…. And suddenly that trashcan starts to look like a toilet. In Smart Tan training courses they suggest using mesh trashcans to discourage this kind of behavior.

      …If I wanted to have to potty train something, I would get a puppy.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 10:00 pm   rating: 52  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   TickleMyBambo

      At least they aren’t peeing INSIDE the tanning beds.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 10:46 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   Canthz_B bang

      If they peed inside the tanning beds the beds would have catchy names like “Old Sparky” and “The Gold Toast”.

      Is that the first PAN electrocution joke?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 12:36 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.4   TickleMyBambo

      Radiated Golden Sparkles?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 1:31 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.5   Canthz_B bang

      Do they have a questionnaire to fill out before tanning?
      Is “Have you ever suffered from enuresis?” one of the questions? How about “Did you go before you left home?” If not, whose fault is this really?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 1:55 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.6   TheOldSchool

      This is a typical example of tanning salon employee hypocrisy.

      These are the same people who bitch when you leave trash in their urinals.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 3:58 am   rating: 38  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.7   The Elf

      Why would you not just pee before if you have a problem with….. er….. “sudden urges”. Whenever I get a massage, I make sure to go to the bathroom before because I don’t want to be uncomfortable during my hour long session. I’m there to relax! Why would you not do the same before tanning?

      I mean, didn’t these people learn to go before you leave the house in toddlerhood?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:48 am   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.8   unsatisfied

      damn these jersey shore kids.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:50 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.9   The Elf

      GTPL, that’s how you make the guidos.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 9:42 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.10   TickleMyBambo

      Dear Jersey Shore Cast,

      The tanning booths are for tanning, the trash bins is for garbage, and the toilets are for peeing and poopin in.

      FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE STOP MIXING AND MATCHING THE THREE!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 12:34 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.11   Sheila

      YES. I worked at a tanning salon one summer in college, and my first week there, someone pooped in the trash. I don’t know WHY this is an issue, but it is.

      Jun 27, 2011 at 1:52 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   FeRD bang

    If they don’t want us to use tanning rooms as toilets, why do they provide these handy chamberpots?

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:40 pm   rating: 51  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Lisa

    So sick and wrong. LOL

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Lucy

    Number one!!!!

    get it? lol

    oh…nevermind…number five doesn’t really apply. :D

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:44 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   TickleMyBambo

      Pun totally appreciated :D

      Jun 1, 2011 at 9:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   Capt_Video

    A friend of mine works at a tanning salon… at least these animals are using the trash cans and not just peeing in the tanning beads!!! Apparently that’s an ongoing issue for most tanning salons.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:47 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   eco bang

      I can only imagine the ongoing issues that would occur from peeing in a bead of any kind.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 9:40 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   bowloftoast bang

    Apparently, tanners aren’t planners.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:49 pm   rating: 44  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   TickleMyBambo

      It should be mandatory that all tanners must wear a depends before using the tanning beds. You know, just in case.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 9:05 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   TickleMyBambo

      It should be mandatory for all tanners to wear depends before using the tanning beds. You know, just in case.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 9:05 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   TickleMyBambo

      Wow, double post FAIL!

      Jun 1, 2011 at 9:57 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   The Elf

      You posted twice, just in case.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:50 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.5   TickleMyBambo

      Well actually my computer posted twice for me, but I guess it wanted my message to come across? You know, just in case?

      Jun 3, 2011 at 5:20 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   the tsars fajita bang

    For just how long were the folks at A Total Tan tolerating people using their tanning rooms like the pee troughs at a stadium? The customer is always wrong when urine is involved.

    I love how the note then clarifies that “it wont be tolerated in the future.” So any previous offenses the staff are aware of are grandfathered under the old plan, and immune to the being very embarrassed.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:50 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   mostnobleblack

    I don’t think I’ve ever been more grateful for being a pasty redhead who is incapable of tanning.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 8:52 pm   rating: 71  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   tish

      OMG i so totally agree!

      Jun 1, 2011 at 10:15 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   chesire cat

      I am with you too! Never been to a tanning bed because I don’t want wrinkles and skin cancer and this makes me smile knowing the bitchy girls who made fun of me for being fair skinned that tanned all the time might have encountered some pee or poop in the trashcan.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 11:05 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.3   AuntyBron

      I’m awfully glad one of my meds tells me to avoid real AND artificial sunlight.

      Jun 1, 2011 at 11:55 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.4   aloria

      Your meds talk to you? You might want to adjust your dose.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:04 am   rating: 51  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.5   Who passed out the Haterade?

      I am with you too! Never been to a tanning bed because I don’t want wrinkles and skin cancer and this makes me smile knowing the bitchy girls who made fun of me for being fair skinned that tanned all the time might have encountered some pee or poop in the trashcan.

      Nah, the real kicker is knowing that now they have to slather themselves in cosmetics to try to hide the fact that their skin is cracked, wrinkled, and leathery. There’s a good reason they used to call hardcore rednecks “leathernecks”.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 2:02 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.6   Noelegy

      Speaking as someone who used to get made fun of in gym class for having white legs, and who now looks at least a good ten years younger than her classmates, I hear you.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 5:49 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Lauri

    I think people who do this kind of thing have to have mental problems. Normal people would do anything to avoid doing something this gross. I’ve heard first-hand stories from people who work in clothing stores so I know people actually do poop in dressing rooms.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 9:04 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   TickleMyBambo

    These tanning places are fortunate that having their trash bins continuously being mistaken for some idiots personal urinal is the only disturbingly disgusting incidents to happen. They haven’t seen nothing until they come across the grotesque graffiti artwork made by “The Poopy Bandit”. Trust me it’s not very pretty.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 9:21 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Grumpy Teacher McGrumperson

      The mind boggles at the concept of a “Poopy Bandit.” It would never even OCCUR to me to do such a thing; how can this possible be something a non-disturbed person might do?

      Jun 3, 2011 at 10:56 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   butt

      It’s not. Those people are disturbed.

      Jun 4, 2011 at 6:13 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   Noelegy

      I used to work in a chain bookstore. There was one restroom for males and females, employees and customers alike. This was an offense of grievous proportions. Not only did we have to keep the restroom locked to try to cut down on theft, but we were constantly interrupted by people asking to be let into the restroom. Why they didn’t put the restroom past the point of purchase is another question altogether. But I’ll never forget the time someone apparently had an episode of explosive diarrhea in the restroom….and then apparently decided to go fingerpainting with it.

      And then there was the mom who, instead of letting us know that her child needed to go to the bathroom, instead informed us that her child had shat upon the carpet. We gave her paper towels (it was a Saturday night and very busy) and this apparently offended her, for she ground the poop with great gusto into our carpet. The section of carpet had to be replaced.

      Retail employees really do not get paid enough to put up with biohazards.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 5:52 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   Michele

    Another reason to avoid UV rays.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 9:32 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Canthz_B bang

      Yeah, Urinary Volatility rays are a real downer.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 10:36 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Elizabeth

    My housemate likes to piss in random places as well. He told me it was normal acceptable behaviour. He pretends he can’t speak English when I ask him.

    Maybe I come from a different culture/planet.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 9:54 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   Seanette

      Maybe you need a housemate who’s housebroken.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 3:39 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Nunavut Guy

      Is your roomate a cat?

      Jun 4, 2011 at 2:24 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   Nikki

    They don’t seem to mind the customers who use the tanning bed as their own personal masturbatorium… Those towels are always fun to pick up!

    Jun 1, 2011 at 10:02 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #14.1   The Elf

      Seriously, who does this? What has to break within your mind to think it is at all acceptable?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:53 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.2   Kate from Iowa

      Really? There are a lot of people who are completely fucking disgusting when they think they’re alone and unobserved.

      Cameras would be an answer. For the security of the tanners, of course. If it would make them feel better about the camera, let them have a little shelf to stick thier watch on or something.

      Of course, there is still a segment of the population that’ll do something reprehensible just because the camera is there…

      Actually I should amend that (after seeing downthread about cameras snuck in) to posted and obvious cameras. “Tan at your own risk” should include the very small chance that staff is going to care enough to laugh at your inverted nipple.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 4:00 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.3   butt

      “There are a lot of people who are completely fucking disgusting when they think they’re alone and unobserved.”

      That’s exactly it. You really find out what someone is like when they think they’re alone, especially in a public bathroom.

      Jun 4, 2011 at 6:17 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.4   The_Great_G

      What else are you supposed to do in there?

      Jun 4, 2011 at 9:47 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #14.5   Noelegy

      Yeah, in that bookstore I mentioned? The restroom had shelves for cleaning supplies. More than once, we found porno mags on the shelves after closing…with the pages stuck together.

      Jul 11, 2011 at 5:53 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #15   Cognitive Dissenter

    This problem won’t go away as long as the tanning salon sign creators presume the violators can read. They’d have better success (maybe) if they posted signs with instructive illustrations. Maybe an alligator rising out of the can and biting their asses?

    Jun 1, 2011 at 10:31 pm   rating: 48  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Grumpy Teacher McGrumperson

      I feel like I should use instructive illustrations – like your beautiful example – for a wide range of things in the future. An alligator biting the ass of an offender is such a satisfying image.

      Instead of “Please flush the toilet” signs, how about a series of images indicating that an alligator will ascend from the bowl and bite the butts of offenders? Bam! The rectal reptile strikes again!

      Jun 3, 2011 at 11:00 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   chesire cat

    This is probably a flame worthy comment but most people I know who use tanning beds are trashy so you know…….

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:03 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Sherie

      Then you obviously know the wrong people.

      Jun 5, 2011 at 4:04 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   MichaelRB

      u ppl are bored and ignorant

      Jun 11, 2011 at 11:31 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Jen-ay

    The worst part for me is that there were five examples from five different places to include in this. Apparently, this is pretty common.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:04 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

    • #17.1   AuntyBron

      And from two continents. Eww!

      Jun 1, 2011 at 11:58 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #17.2   TheOldSchool

      And only one of them, Eur-a-peein.’

      Jun 2, 2011 at 3:35 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #18   trillium

    Every time I think I couldn’t be more disgusted by people, I read something like this. Seriously, WTF??!?

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Pit Pat

    Wait – where does A Total Tan get off titling their note “Health Notice?!” Since when were tanning salons concerned about anyone’s health?

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:11 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   The Elf

      There’s health and then there’s health. Preventing the spread of communicable diseases via body waste, that’s a concern about health. But skin cancer isn’t communicable, so you’re on your own.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:56 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.2   clumber

      There’s also customer health verses employee health. The customer makes the choice to expose themselves to concentrated carcinogen. The employees probably signed up for the job expecting anything other than being a pee detective.

      And FFS, really?! REALLY???? How would that even occur to someone to do? I’d damage my kidneys searching for a clean restroom before considering a trashcan, tanning bed, dressing room…. Sometimes I just can’t wrap my head around how phenomenally douchewaffle people can be.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:11 am   rating: 28  small thumbs up

       
    • #19.3   Robyn

      thank you and amen.
      i did not apply for a pee detective job.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:46 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Leonna

    eww – I just started using a tanning salon so I dont burn – again – when I go on vacation. But now I’m curious – who the HELL pees in a garbage can or in the TANNING BED THEY ARE LAYING IN?

    What type of person thinks to themselves “oh, well, whatever, I’m just going to sit in my own urine as it heats up around me. Helps bring out the color in my asscheeks.”

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:34 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

    • #20.1   clumber

      I guess today’s post suggests that you should consider taking a black light with you next time?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:12 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #20.2   Seanette

      Disinfectant wipes or a can of Lysol sound good, too.

      (adds “sanitation problems” to the list of reasons I don’t tan)

      Jun 2, 2011 at 11:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #21   JetJackson

    The ‘flat bottom taco’ kid says…

    “Why not just remove the bins from the room?”

    ♫“Yaaaahhy! Dah-da-da-da-da-dah-dah dah-dah-dah dah-dah-dah-dah! ♫

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:40 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   Karnivax

      If there’s no trash can, they’ll piss in a corner of the room. A truly dedicated slob is never deterred by a lack of receptacle.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 10:19 am   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.2   Jimmy James

      Then maybe make the rooms circular, so they don’t even have a corner?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 10:28 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.3   Karnivax

      Does a lack of corners prevent people from being disgusting?

      BRB, getting a research grant…

      Jun 2, 2011 at 10:39 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

       
    • #21.4   The Elf

      They’re people, not ferrets!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 11:04 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   James L.

    To all of the guys whom I have made fun of in the past after reading about you being arrested for installing hidden video cameras in tanning salons, I hereby apologize.

    I had assumed that you were all perverts. I now realize that you were merely health inspectors.

    Jun 1, 2011 at 11:53 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #22.1   Jordie

      The drama teacher at the college I’m currently attending got in trouble for doing this a year ago. He was 86 and slipping cameras into the girls’ dressing room. D:

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:56 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #23   Canthz_B bang

    All I can say is, “Hahahahaha, you need a tanning bed to get some color and I was born with it…and can pee without losing toning time…and the color is free, doesn’t fade away, doesn’t cause skin cancer, but helps prevent it. Not a bad trade-off in the end!!” :-P

    Jun 2, 2011 at 12:23 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #23.1   TickleMyBambo

      CB, you should go to a tanning salon and punk some people into thinking you’re there to get a tan. The results would be hilarious! Believe I would do it myself, but sadly I was born a pasty white kid so it wouldn’t be as funny.

      I’m so pasty white, my skins acts like a light reflector that instantly blinds people in a 5 ft radius. One time a little girl told me that I was so white that to her I looked like one of those “Pretty sparkly vampires from Twilight”. Oh the shame.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 1:52 am   rating: 28  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.2   Canthz_B bang

      No, I should go threatening to sue them…”LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST THURSDAY!!! I CAN’T EVEN GET A TAXI NOW, AND THE COPS HAVE PULLED ME OVER THREE TIMES FOR ‘ROUTINE’ DOCUMENT CHECKS WHEN I USE MY OWN CAR!!!”

      Black may be beautiful, but it comes with a price. :-P

      Jun 2, 2011 at 2:00 am   rating: 46  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.3   TickleMyBambo

      HAHAHAHA! Oh CB, such threats would have the employees shitting in their trash bins ^_^

      Jun 2, 2011 at 2:32 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.4   The Elf

      OMG, CB I would pay to see that. Totally.

      TickleMyBambo and I must have the same complexion. I don’t tan. I’m the person on the beach with the sunblock that feels like thick glue (applied religiously over the course of the day), the cover-up, and the hat. It’s either that or full-on lobster look. The idea of going to a tanning salon just makes me cringe as I know it would mean oatmeal baths for a week afterwards.

      Now I have another reason to avoid the place!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:04 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.5   Cognitive Dissenter

      This really throws a wrench in racial profiling. ; )

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:34 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.6   Jordie

      D:! My best friend is one sixteenth Native American and somehow that is STILL enough for her to get a perfect tan.

      Me, I’m half Dutch, half European mix. I burn like a lobster, but used to suffer through it in my teens, because when the red peeled away (gross!) the perfect tan was always waiting for me!

      …and now I have freckles all over my shoulders. xP Yay, skin cancer!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 6:59 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.7   Canthz_B bang

      Half Dutch and half European? I know there have been lots of changes in the world since I was in school, but when did they move Holland? :lol:

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:21 pm   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.8   The Elf

      I decided to get my own kind of color. Instead of tanning, I get tattoos.

      Jun 3, 2011 at 7:28 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.9   TickleMyBambo

      Elf, I can’t help but think that we have quite a bit in common for two strangers in PAN world :D. Though the tattoo thing I’m still working on.

      I’m half German and half Irish so that kind of sets me at a disadvantage when it comes to getting a natural tan. I know what nasty things that go on in tanning booths so I don’t even bother with getting a fake tan. After a few times burning I eventually get a little bit of color. I dunno, I don’t find extremely tan people to be attractive and I’ve grown used to my pale skin so I find it all pointless in general.

      Jun 3, 2011 at 5:34 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #23.10   Jordie

      Let me revise that, Canth! Half Dutch and half Mutt! :D

      Jun 5, 2011 at 3:59 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #24   Canthz_B bang

    I’ve never been to a tanning salon, but now I can imagine what they must smell like.
    If you’ve never been, urine for a surprise.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 12:26 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

    • #24.1   JetJackson

      Oh CB, Bad pun you! :)

      Jun 2, 2011 at 12:34 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #24.2   Canthz_B bang

      Aw, Jet, don’t mind me. I was just taking a piss! :mrgreen:

      Jun 2, 2011 at 12:41 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #25   Earl Hamsher

    i’ve seen stories like this a lot. apparently it’s very common for people to use the trashcan as a toilet in tanning rooms. i really don’t give a shit though as i believe tanners are 99% shitheads anyway. let them smell each other’s poo.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 12:42 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #25.1   Jordie

      Mmph… “don’t give a shit!” :D Sorry, I stopped taking your post seriously after that. Hope I didn’t piss on your opinion.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:00 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #26   Canthz_B bang

    Use our bathroom facilities.
    This is not the wilderness.
    If it were, you’d be out in the sun and would not need our tanning facilities.
    You’d be an active, outgoing person unashamed of your natural appearance. Not someone paying us to help you build your self-esteem in a most superficial way.
    BTW, your membership expires at the end of the month. Please see Sandra at the front desk to continue paying us to give you a temporary sense of well-being.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 12:57 am   rating: 34  small thumbs up

     
  • #27   KJS

    Oh. Good. God. I knew there was a reason I’ve always been irrationally wary around unseasonably orange people. I guess it’s not just an Oompa Loompa phobia after all…

    Jun 2, 2011 at 3:25 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   The Elf

      Hey, maybe that’s why artificial tans are so yellowy?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:05 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.2   Canthz_B bang

      ROTFLMAO! Ooompa Loompas?! That’s gonna have me laughing all day!! :lol:

      ♫ Oompa Loompa doopety-do, we’ve got another message for you. Pee-ing in trash bins is crass, they’re here only for trash.
      Take our advice and do well, using our restrooms is swell. Oompa Loompa doopety-do! ♫

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:59 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.3   shwo! bang

      Nice try, CB, but your meter is a little off:

      ♫ Why do you think, when you’re getting a tan,
      The best place to pee pee is there in that can? ♫

      Jun 2, 2011 at 10:45 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.4   The Elf

      That’s not a chocolate waterfall…..

      Jun 2, 2011 at 11:05 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.5   Canthz_B bang

      Could be, shwo!. I haven’t seen that movie in about the last 25 years or so…hey, I tried, ;-)

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:26 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   Daisy

    Wow – I have never tanned in a salon but it shocks me to think that people would do this…It’s insane!

    Jun 2, 2011 at 7:32 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #29   havingfitz

    I’d love to leave these people a voicemail advising them to come back to the tanning salon at once to retrieve their lost property, and then hand them a baggie upon their return. “Here. I’m sure you didn’t mean to throw this away.”

    Jun 2, 2011 at 7:36 am   rating: 28  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   Pit Pat

    HEALTH NOTICE

    Toilet Issues

    The Restroom is not a Tanning Room!

    It is extremely dangerous for A Total Toilet employees to clean up trash cans and under rugs that people have used instead of the tanning bed. This will no longer be tolerated!

    A Total Toilet has a record of everyone using each toilet. In the future, using the toilet as a tanning room will not be tolerated. This will be very embarrassing to you!

    It is not embarrassing for us to restart your toilet if you need to stop before or during your session. Simply put on your clothes and ask the employee to stop your toilet session.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 8:21 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   Buck

    Glad I live in Arizona where tanning salons are really not a necessity of life. I always thought people who went to those things were a little gross on general principles but it’s nice to have empirical evidence that they’re disgusting. Ewww….

    Jun 2, 2011 at 9:09 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   Canthz_B bang

      They have to use tanning salons. We here in AZ have stolen most of their sunshine…and we’re going to keep it too! :-P

      Jun 2, 2011 at 9:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   Canthz_B bang

    Peeing inside a tanning bed isn’t tanning…it’s braising.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 9:27 am   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #33   Nope

    While this habit is certainly disgusting, couldn’t the problem by solved by putting actual toilets in the rooms with the tanning beds?

    Jun 2, 2011 at 9:44 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   Canthz_B bang

    Which episode of “The Golden Girls” was this again?

    Jun 2, 2011 at 9:59 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   Victoria

    It just goes to show the people who would use a tanning salon are such selfish assholes that they assume this behavior is fine, and that their pee isn’t gross in anyway because it’s THEIRS. I’m a professional body piercer and you wouldn’t believe the grossness I witness because humans assume their own staph bacteria/blood is harmless and have zero concept of cross contamination. “I got this pierced and now it hurts”… as I watch them rub their dirty finger into and then attempt to touch other things in the shop, including the door on the way out… I need a bubble.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 11:01 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   danielle

    I used to work at a tanning salon and, yes, this did happen to us numerous times! Freakin disgusting!! I mean seriously, our computers know who is in each room, so we know who you are! Although by the time we would go to clean the room, they’d be long gone & usually would never come back for a scolding…such a gross job, never mind the massive puddles of sweat on the beds, or the period blood :/

    Jun 2, 2011 at 12:27 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   it's naptime

      Oh, come on! I just ate for God’s sake!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 2:10 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.2   Chesire Cat

      OMG! That is so disgusting. I just threw up in my mouth a little. Period blood!!??? Yeah, I am very glad I made the decision to dislike tanning beds and never go to one.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 3:41 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.3   Kate from Iowa

      Why the hell would you go when you were on the RAG? And if you just absolutely HAD to, what, is the tampon string going to leave a visible line?

      Jun 2, 2011 at 4:06 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.4   Jordie

      Gross… I’ve never thought of this before, but what about… y’know… OTHER secretions? And loose pube hairs? And *gags* okay, done with this subject…

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:13 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.5   Canthz_B bang

      LOL, you gagged on your own loose pubic hair! Well done!!

      Jun 2, 2011 at 7:29 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.6   unsatisfied

      period blood. I hear ya.

      when I was a teenager working at a bob evans restaurant, I was sent into the women’s room to clean it after the restaurant closed.

      I walked in and walked right back out.

      the one stall looked like a murder had been committed in it.

      Jun 2, 2011 at 8:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.7   Chesire Cat

      ……yikes. I don’t know why a woman would not clean up after themselves.

      Like if you are on your period and want to tan, put in a tampon and wear your underwear. Its not that hard! Is no tan lines on your ass really that important?! Or maybe she could have started without knowing while tanning, but damn you think she would notice and then c lean it up. Vomit

      Jun 3, 2011 at 9:51 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   Name Withheld

    I have a friend who has worked at a major dept. store. She told me they have found poop in the dressing rooms on more than one occasion. Evidently this kind of act is rampant.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 5:29 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #38   Robyn

    I worked at a tanning salon while in college…its a great job while being in school. Three times I had to clean up after someone. Thank God it was only a #1. It was so offensive and disrespectful. After the first incident we started checking the garbage before and after each person. By the third time, I found out exactly who it was. A 15-year old girl! Needless to say a very, very embaressing conversation was had with her and her mom who signed her waiver to go tanning as she was underage. Shame on her and anyone else who does the same.

    Jun 2, 2011 at 7:36 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   Chesire Cat

      Shame all around. Shame on her mom for letting her tan that young. And shame on her for pissing in the garbage.

      Jun 3, 2011 at 9:53 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.2   butt

      Was the mom appalled or just shrugged it off?

      Jun 4, 2011 at 6:27 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.3   amy

      nah, mom probably taught her that this was appropriate.

      Jun 6, 2011 at 12:43 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   Carl

    I’ve never been to a tanning salon before, and I’m very confused by this post. One typically lies in a tanning BED, right? Where exactly are these people relieving themselves?

    Jun 8, 2011 at 10:27 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #40   Sadie

    A Total Tan is in my hometown, where there is a huge university (which definitely attracts a huge number of Jersey Shore kids), and their tans cost $3 or something–that combination is dangerous, and, apparently, potentially disgusting…ah, students are gross.

    Jun 9, 2011 at 1:12 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Elizabeth

    GTS.

    Gym. Tan. Shit.

    Jun 30, 2011 at 3:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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