Entries from June 2011
“As far as I know,” says Meagan in Ohio, “my boss, an early-40s white lady named Sandee, is a native English speaker.” I made sure to double-check with Meaghan on this, because, well — just read the thing.
As Meagan points out, her boss “does not seem to understand that the pet peeve is the thing you shouldn’t do…or that ‘peteve’ is not a thing…or really, anything. How could you hit ‘print’ on this?”
Except to underline the fact that Meagan’s place of employment is a winery — one where open bottles of wine seem have to have a tendency to be strewn about willy-nilly — I must say I have no idea.
related: My pet peeve
Tags: bold-underlined-caps · now that's management · spelling and grammar police · WTF? · You call that punctuation?
From a convenience store in Florida:
A petting zoo in Virginia:
And a U.S. Army post in Washington State:
(Thanks to Nicolette, Gaby, and Kharissa for submitting!)
related: Is this a thing now?
Tags: actually totally reasonable · bodily fluids · hygiene · money · most popular notes of 2011 · that's unsanitary · WTF?
“My parents have a large front yard,” writes David in Georgia, “and up until a few years ago, it had about 40 trees in it.” Unfortunately, an arborist informed David’s parents that those trees, while they looked normal enough, had become infested and essentially hollowed-out by insects, killing the trees and turning them into a pretty big safety risk in the case of a storm. At the arborist’s recommendation — and I’m sure, at all no small expense — David’s parents had the trees removed.
Fast forward a few months to December, when the family put up their usual holiday decorations — little trees made of Christmas lights — throughout the front yard. Soon after, David says, the family received two items of interest in their mailbox:
1. A certificate of recognition from the Arbor Day Foundation, “thanking us for our efforts to prevent further tree deaths”
2. This handmade holiday card.
Adds David: “This person obviously put a lot of work into carefully drawing and writing it; the artwork and penmanship are immaculate. If only they’d put as much effort into asking us why we were having the trees removed.”
related: All together now…please don’t climb the tree!
Tags: Christmas · flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens · Georgia · holiday spirit · neighbors · Oops?
I happen to have a lot of friends who are teachers, and it kills me when they say things like, “Oh, I confiscated the funniest passive-aggressive note today from a kid in my class. I wish I could give it to you, but I don’t want to lose my job.” (Of course, given the state of education funding in Texas, that’s not mere paranoia talking.)
Luckily, there are enough self-aware parents out there like Carmen (a.k.a. “drunk mommy”) to fill the kids say the dardnest fuckin’ shit category of notes that some of you love and some of you can’t stand.
One of those parents is Sheila in Indiana. Her first grader, Andrew, “has had a rough year,” Sheila says, “and is in trouble for talking too much every single day.” When she gave him a card to sign for Teacher Appreciation Day, this is what he wrote.
Meanwhile, Jessie in Utah says that for teacher appreciation day at her first grader’s school, the kids were all asked to write something they appreciated about their teacher on paper butterflies displayed on the door and wall outside the classroom. The anonymous nature of the project seems to have yielded mixed results.
To wrap things up, I just had to pull out this first grader’s letter from the archives. (And no, like many notes on this site, it isn’t passive-aggressive — or even mean-spirited — just adorably bizarre.)
related: (Not) so nice, (Not) so smart
Tags: kids · most popular notes of 2011 · schools & teachers
New Year’s Eve, Miami, 2010: “A man handed me this and then walked away without a word,” our submitter recalls. “I was tipsy enough to be flattered for a moment.”
related: A critique of your online dating profile
extra credit: “The Most Beautiful Girl (In the Room)” [youtube.com]
Tags: art · backhanded compliment · drizzunk · Miami
I asked our submitter if she might be able to snap another photo of this memo/notice — one without the ghostly reflection of the man in the wifebeater — but alas, she says, it has since been taken down and replaced with a new memo offering a $500 reward for information leading to the culprit still vandalizing the elevator.
And yet, now that I’ve spent a little time with this image (in all of its beautiful absurdity), I’ve come to feel that it just wouldn’t feel quite complete without wifebeater man. Because this, my friends, is a work of art.
related: Thx Sandra
Tags: elevator · landlords and property managers · Seattle · spelling and grammar police · vandalism · WTF?
Well, besides that whole skin cancer thing, there’s the fact that tanning booths — like thrift-store fitting rooms — seem to bring out the animal in everyone. And that’s probably not the kind of “golden glow” you were aiming for, right?
Exhibit A) From Margo in Indiana:
Exhibit B) From Lisa in Ohio, an ominous threat indeed:
Exhibit C) From Emily in England:
Exhibit D) From Ann in Arkansas:
And Exhibit E) From an anonymous fake-baker in Louisiana:
related: When nature calls
extra credit: GTK is the new GTL
Tags: hygiene · most popular notes of 2011 · piss · that's disgusting · that's trashy · that's unsanitary