Entries from August 2011

Cupcakes make people [fill in the blank]

August 31st, 2011 · 85 Comments

Well, lookie here: this office in Florida has a “Jeff” of their own!

related: A citation from the fat policeSprinkles are for cupcakes

Tags: cake · food · hey fatty · office · questionable logic

A little bump and slide

August 30th, 2011 · 67 Comments

According to our submitter, this car hasn’t been spotted in the path since.

THANKS FOR ALWAYS PARKING ACROSS THE PATH. IT GIVES ME THE CHANCE TO BE A MOVIE STAR & SLIDE ACROSS YOUR HOOD NOW & THEN. TRY IT, IT'S AWESOME!

related: BAD PARK YOU!

Tags: car · most popular notes of 2011 · parking · reverse psychology · smartass

Law & Order: Social Media Unit

August 29th, 2011 · 55 Comments

Kelly in Halifax was on her way to the bus terminal when a note in the window of a small souvenir shop caught her eye. A few days later, she spotted an update, too.

On Facebook, YouTube...PLEASE HELP ME FIND THEIR PARENTS. They need to know what their children do outside their homes. Their shoplifting behaviors should be stopped and corrected. Collin, please turn yourself in. If not, a criminal charge will be made.

On Facebook, YouTube...PLEASE HELP ME FIND THEIR PARENTS. They need to know what their children do outside their homes. Their shoplifting behaviors should be stopped and corrected. The young man on the photo has made an apology to the store. His photos will be removed when he pays for the products.

(And no, the black bars weren’t present in the original photos.)

related: Well, that’s one way to get your landlord’s attention.

Tags: Canada · Halifax · public shaming · retail hell · stealing

Now, if we could all just take our own advice…

August 27th, 2011 · 69 Comments

Really, some people are just better off living alone.

Presented in order of appearance:

If you used the last piece, throw this away and put a new roll on.

 If you see the roll done, don't write a note. Just fuckin replace it bitch.

[Roommate 1:] If you see the roll done, don't write a note. Just fuckin replace it bitch. [Roommate 2:] You just did the exact opposite of what you wrote.

related: What’s harder than changing the toilet paper roll?

Tags: most popular notes of 2011 · note wars · roommates · toilet paper

But where is the dental clinic?

August 25th, 2011 · 44 Comments

Patti in Madrid, Spain couldn’t help but laugh when she saw this notice. “I kept imagining all the losers buzzing random apartments, asking, ‘Hey, is this the dental clinic?’” — presumably, until one of the frustrated residents posted this sign.

La clínica dental es en el botón que pone "Clínica Dental." ¡¡Gracias!! (Translation: The dental clinic is at the button that says "dental clinic." Thank you!)

Translation: The dental clinic is at the button that says “dental clinic.” Thank you!

Clínica Dental Alcala

related: Please, contain your excitement.

Tags: Espanol · gloriously redundant · Spain

…and leave off the last “S” for “stolen”?

August 24th, 2011 · 39 Comments

Allie in Ypsilanti, Michigan was walking into her local Target store when she noticed this little art installation on the sidewalk outside. Granted, she says, “The closest Wal-Mart is about two miles away, and I have no idea how the cart got there either.”

The chalk artist had also drawn purple arrows across the parking lot in the direction of the Wal-Mart, and while Allie says she didn’t check to see if the chalk lines extended all the way to the store, “drawing the arrows but not taking the cart back would have been pretty P-A.”

Thi [sic] is from Wal-Mart. How did it get here?

Meanwhile, Michi spotted this piece of guerilla knitwork chained to a post near NYU. (“It was, on inspection, empty.”)

DON'T STEAL FROM PUBLIC

related: To whoever left this cart here — you are precisely what is wrong with America!

extra credit: Why Wal-Mart’s current business model is doomed [AdAge]

Tags: Michigan · retail hell · WTF?

An eye for an eye, an eyesore for an eyesore

August 23rd, 2011 · 66 Comments

Mim decided to take a back road to a friend’s house in Wisconsin when she spotted this sign in someone’s front yard — presumably, she says, a reaction to the two large silos that were recently erected in the corn field across the road.

Thank you Mike, Jeanne [last name redacted] for being such inconsiderate neighbors.

related: Roadside intervention

Tags: neighbors · public shaming · small town living · Wisconsin

Wrath of the Ancients™ 2.0

August 22nd, 2011 · 47 Comments

At Summer’s office in Austin, there are a few known “soakers” who constantly leave their dirty dishes in their sink. Apparently, the office soothsayer has had about enough of this practice.

(click the image below to enlarge)

Do not leave dirty dishes in the sink. The wrath of the ancients will fall upon your head. You will be cursed and misery will accompany you for your remaining days. You will constantly trip over things that are not there. The IRS will audit you. Your dog will run away at the sight of you. Your shoelaces will not stay tied. Mysterious clowns will seem to always be watching you. Rabid squirrels will invade your home. Your food in the work refrigerator will mysteriously spoil (and only yours. No one else's.) Your car  will start making the expensive knocking/tapping sound and NO ONE WILL TALK TO YOU AT PARTIES EVER AGAIN.

P.S. I kinda have a crush on this sign.

related: Things not to flush down the toilet: your hopes, your dreams…your sweaters

Tags: Austin · dishes · most popular notes of 2011 · not-so-veiled threats · office · smartass

Isn’t starting middle school torture enough?

August 21st, 2011 · 67 Comments

Hollie in Portland, Oregon spotted this note on the second-floor landing as she was walking up to her apartment.

While I’m usually not in favor of note-leaving when a direct confrontation would do, I give this one a pass — creative spelling and all — because, really, have you ever met a middle schooler without an an attitude? I’d say forcing a kid to make it through eighth grade is enough of an ass-kicking already.

Dear niebors, I'm tiered of you wakeing me up During the night. When I go middle school in two weeks I'm gonna need to wake up at 6:15! Next time you stomp in the middle of the night I'm gonna call the office and tell them about all the times you woke me up, especelly if you make it so I'm late for school! Sincerly, The girl who lives in 346

related: Another Portland teen takes on her noisy neighbors

Tags: kids · neighbors · noise · Portland

In case you’d forgotten that you are but a tiny, eminently replaceable cog in this vast machine…

August 18th, 2011 · 77 Comments

Your corporate overlords would like to offer this friendly reminder of how much we value our employees!

Hi Everyone, Effective immediately, [redacted] no longer works for [redacted]. On a more positive note, [redacted] (a new Qualifier) starts on Monday! Just wanted to keep everyone in the loop. I hope your [sic] having a great day!! TGIF... :) Thank you

related: Recession incentive plan

Tags: all-staff e-mail · California · fired · now that's management · smiley · your/you're