A citation from the fat police

August 14th, 2011 · 175 comments

Writes an office worker in Alabama: “A co-worker attends a weekly cooking class in town, and this week they made a Cinnamon Roll Casserole. The co-worker decided to bring it in to work and share it with the office.” The nerve of some people!

Hey J, Brining [sic] in food items that are very heavy in calories is only fueling people’s addiction to sugar. It is the same as fueling people other desire in pursuits that you might consider as sin such as alcohol or drugs. People addicted to drugs and alcohol have problems controlling themselves around these items. The same goes for high calorie foods. The consequence for quick satisfaction as you know are being fat and unhealthy. Unless you wish others to be fat and unhealthy, please bring only healthy food. Thanks, Jeff

related: Loose lips shrink hips

FILED UNDER: "helpful" advice · Alabama · e-mail · food · hey fatty · office · office cop


175 responses so far ↓

  • #1   KST

    Someone needs to tell Jeff “eat me, instead of the casserole, you sanctimonious a-hole.”

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:13 pm   rating: 386  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Mar

      KST your comment was funny and then you lost me after casserole. We don’t know the guy is a jerk or a-hole. Maybe he just feels strongly opposed to junk food. I certainly do. Maybe his family is obese, maybe he used to be. Who knows!

      Why people feel the need to always take things a step further with cussing and attacking is a mystery. Don’t get me wrong – I love the word a-hole. Only you seem plenty funny without having to resort to bad words.

      Carry on.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:38 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   KST

      Sorry about that. I happen to be a little overweight myself and if I saw this message, I would be a little miffed because he is kind of messing in my own choices. You know, if I want to eat an entire cinnamon casserole, that’s my business. I don’t need someone to speak for me, you know what I mean?
      But I used the word a-hole because I don’t like saying the actual word.
      Thank you for the compliment and I mean that sincerely. I will try to watch it. :-) I understand what you mean.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:51 pm   rating: 65  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   KST

      I would also like to say that I have lost 142 lbs over the last 10 years (50 of it in the last 18 months) but I eat that fun stuff too. ;-)

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:54 pm   rating: 96  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   Sarah TX

      I think it’s safe to say that this guy is an asshole who also happens to be overly concerned about other people’s diets.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 6:16 pm   rating: 204  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.5   Jo's comment

      ungrateful a-hole

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:08 am   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.6   The Elf

      Somebody who is opposed to junk food and has strong feelings about obesity can simply not eat it. I would even go so far as saying that they can advocate for placing said junk food away from their immediate work area, if they have trouble controlling their impulses with food.

      Jeff is taking it a step further and trying to control everyone else’s food choices. He’s a sanctimonious a-hole. It’s an entirely appropriate word choice.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:20 am   rating: 217  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.7   Junebug

      So it is ok to tell someone to “eat me” but you have a problem with “a-hole”?

      They are both rude, and in this case, appropriate.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 9:50 am   rating: 101  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.8   bookworm

      Mar’s comment is like the cussing equivalent of Jeff’s tirade. “I don’t like it, so no one else should do it” except in Mar’s case, they’re assigning conditions for when cussing would be appropriate enough for them. The nerve!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:27 am   rating: 70  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.9   Dalamara

      He sounds like an A-hole to me. Equating sugar as a sin sounds like a self-righteous prick who does not believe in any sort of indulgence in life.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 12:38 pm   rating: 47  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.10   Amy

      Mar, you don’t think the comment in the note where he insults the person who brought in the casserole by calling her fat and unhealthy qualifies him as an a-hole? Hmm.

      Aug 17, 2011 at 1:35 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.11   Nocturnesthesia

      How can you defend that behavior? Holy shit, Mar. Equating junk food with alcohol or drug addiction is fucking ridiculous. If you absolutely cannot share the same plane of existence with a plate of junk food without shoving the entire content into your slimy gullet, then you’ve got some problems that aren’t going to be solved by being a whiny, insufferable cunt to your coworkers.

      Aug 25, 2011 at 11:20 pm   rating: 49  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Angela

    I hope never to be invited to one of Jeff’s dinner parties.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:13 pm   rating: 151  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   Jimmy James

      Why am I picturing that as being exaclty like Rob Lowe’s character from Parks and Recreation. “Instead of cake, for dessert we have a vegetable loaf sweetened with a fruit reduction!”

      Aug 14, 2011 at 7:32 pm   rating: 66  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   jellydonut

    Jeff, how about you learn some self-control instead of blaming everyone around you for your own problems? Fuck off.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:14 pm   rating: 243  small thumbs up

    • #3.1   Seanette

      Or at least learn to write coherent English!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 4:27 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.2   Mar

      jellydonut – calm the hell down and see above. *roll eyes*

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:42 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.3   Z

      The funny part is how it’s never specified that Jeff is the one that can’t control himself. But hey, I don’t like his email, so he must be fat!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:43 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.4   kenzie

      is Mar being sarcastic? or is she just lost?

      Aug 14, 2011 at 7:15 pm   rating: 88  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.5   kathleen

      Mar:

      Are you the language police? People use words like asshole and fuck all the time. Get over it. Or don’t read the comments here. ::Rolls eyes::

      Aug 14, 2011 at 7:46 pm   rating: 135  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.6   FeRD bang

      Indeed. Mar, you made your point replying to the first comment. That was fine. Don’t ruin it by not knowing when to STFU.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 11:21 pm   rating: 95  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.7   Wilma Jo

      I totally agree with you, jellydonut. Don’t pay any attention to Mar. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with him/her. I’ve been reading passive aggressive notes.com for years and there has always been cussing. Get a life, people! Good lord…it’s humor. Start yourself a no-cussing website if you hate it. “haters gonna hate” dumbasses….grownups saying a-hole, I mean PLEASE!!!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:26 am   rating: 37  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.8   Rattus

      Apparently Mar doesn’t realize that s/he is being a santimonious a-hole. Tee hee.

      Anyway, Jeff needs a punching. A fucking punching because he’s a judgmental douchebag.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:45 am   rating: 55  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.9   mamason bang

      People around here certainly do use words like asshole and fuck all the time. *not that there’s anything wrong with that*

      Aug 15, 2011 at 1:36 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.10   clever name

      Sorry Mar. You are not the daddy, and people talk how they want.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 1:38 pm   rating: 34  small thumbs up

       
    • #3.11   Royer

      I can’t help but think that the office would be better served if Jeff started working from home…permanently

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:45 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #4   Molly

    I would never last in this workplace considering my love of sharing “special” brownies and rum soaked ladyfingers. They are all so fortunate, though, to have Jeff looking out for their wellbeing. Apparently they cannot self-manage without his wise direction…

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:16 pm   rating: 92  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Ellere

      You bring pot brownies to work???

      Aug 14, 2011 at 9:44 pm   rating: 30  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.2   The Elf

      I want to work there.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:09 am   rating: 23  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.3   Lili

      Mel, we need to connect on linkedin so that if you start looking for a new direction, and if we start looking for new employees, we can connect and make rum-soaked ladyfingers and Bailey’s iced coffees at 3:00 p.m. tea time a REALITY.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 10:38 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #4.4   Sean

      Molly — I’d expect that you wouldn’t last long in pretty much ANY workplace.

      Aug 22, 2011 at 8:26 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   astounder

    Um, this is one of those things that I would probably take to HR, and I am a big fan of letting ridiculous bullshit slide.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:17 pm   rating: 94  small thumbs up

     
  • #6   David Larsen

    the blatant disregard of spelling and grammar is most offensive to me.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:19 pm   rating: 68  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   anonymouse

    Apparently Anorexic Jeff has not mastered the concept of controlling moving his hand to his mouth.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:20 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   The Elf

      I think that would be *bulemic* Jeff. Sounds like his problem is more keeping himself from binging then it is making himself eat.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:24 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Bex

    Well, I would think Brining the food would also make it somewhat salty as well as high in calories. Salt is a killer, people!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:20 pm   rating: 88  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Zinnia

    I would have no part of a cinnamon roll casserole soaked in brine; trying to watch my sodium intake.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:21 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   WickedSteppMom

    #1-Now I’m going to have to Google “Cinnamon Roll Casserole” b/c that sounds awesome!

    #2-How can Jeff eat anything with his head that far up his own a*s?

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:22 pm   rating: 149  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   BrookeDiz

      If it’s anything like Monkey Bread, yum!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:14 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   Melissa R

      Oh, good gravy Marie, it’s two cans of cresent rolls with two packages of cream cheese and sugar spread on them, topped with cinnamon sugar, and melted butter poured on top!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 6:01 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.3   Lora

      Jesus, that’s like diabetes in a casserole dish!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 9:38 pm   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.4   The Elf

      Make it with splenda because some ppl are diabetic.

      Thx,

      Sandra

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:12 am   rating: 48  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.5   unsatisfied

      that cinnamon roll cassarole is fuckin’ delicious.

      (eat THAT, mar…..)

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:31 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   Jenn50

    SO….FREAKING….ANGRY!!! Hey JEFF! Don’t worry, that delightful food wasn’t for you anyway. I don’t need some self-appointed food cop telling me what EVERYONE in the office can and cannot eat. GAHHHH!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:22 pm   rating: 47  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Elocin

    Some women In my office tried to tell me what I could have for lunch after they joined weight watchers. My words to them – it’s about your self-control, not controlling others. And these chips are FUCKING DELICIOUS! Nom Nom Nom!!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:23 pm   rating: 150  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Z

      Do all fat people have as little self-control as you?

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:39 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   jadefirefly

      @Z: Do all assholes have as little self-control as you?

      Aug 14, 2011 at 5:55 pm   rating: 147  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   David

      Ah, I think I understand now:

      Z’s comment: Not okay, he insulted someone.

      jadefirefly’s comment: Totally okay, she insulted someone.

      The old “But he did it first!” excuse. Favorite of seven-year-olds everywhere.

      Aug 17, 2011 at 1:58 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.4   Sean

      David — insulting someone for their weight, being an asshole. Insulting someone for being an asshole, not being an asshole.

      Aug 22, 2011 at 8:29 am   rating: 57  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.5   David

      Right, like I said– he did it first, so it’s okay. It’s totally okay to be a jerk as long as someone else was a jerk first. I used that argument when I was a child, too.

      Aug 31, 2011 at 8:47 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Dee

    Uh-oh, don’t tell Jeff but after reading this, I really want that Cinnamon Roll Casserole recipe!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:33 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Stacey

    I kind of want that recipe.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:42 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Lori

    “As you know”??? What a jerk!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:47 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Alexis

    Dear Jeff,
    Go suck an egg.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:49 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

    • #16.1   Jimmy James

      That’s an irresponsible and horrible thing to say, Alexis. Everyone knows eggs are loaded with cholesterol. Why not suggest a healthy alternative, like “Go suck a turnip”?

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:32 am   rating: 118  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.2   Clumber

      @JJ: If it were one of Baldrick’s naughty turnips it would be just that much more PAN, too!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:49 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.3   bookworm

      If he were to suck just the egg whites and not the yolk, he could still suck an egg and not have to worry about cholesterol.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:30 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.4   Clumber

      @bookworm; that sounds like a higher level of egg-sucking, and from that email I have my doubts that Jeff is up to the challenge.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:19 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.5   redheadwglasses

      Actually, eggs aren’t “loaded” with cholesterol at all. Suck away, Jeff!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 12:39 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

       
    • #16.6   gloomy

      @ jimmyjames,

      Go suck some egg beaters?

      Aug 27, 2011 at 7:18 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #17   Jen

    Did he really call the casserole baker “fat and unhealthy?” What a dickweed. Yeah, next time bring his primal eating hipster ass some locally harvested dandelion greens.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:49 pm   rating: 46  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   mrazda71

    Either A, Jeff didn’t get a share B, Jeff is on a diet and cant control HIMSELF or C, Jeff doesn’t like Cinnamon … Either way … Stop being a party pooper Jeffery Weffery! :)

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:50 pm   rating: 19  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Buck

    One reason I could never work in an office setting ever again. I’m afraid that I would neglect my work to make Jeff my special project and since I’m a very good cook and specialize in desserts and sweets each day there would be a “high calorie” party outside his door or cubicle. Of course, it sounds like Jeff is one of those people who probably has joined Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. There is no bigger ass than the “converted” who feel the need to police the rest of the world.

    As for the Cinnamon Roll Casserole… count me in on the recipe too! That sounds… amazing. :)

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:52 pm   rating: 54  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Manda

      Most successful WW people are OK. I joined WW and have lost 50 pounds. However, I do not tell people how to eat. I look at desserts as a chance to improve my self control. I take half a portion and eat very sensibly the rest of the time. In regards to Jeff, I too would bring in fudge brownies, cookies or pie for him.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:25 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Callyn

    I suddenly not only want that recipe, but I’d like to force feed it to every Jeff I know in hopes that I might be shoving it down this self-righteous asshole’s fat-loathing throat.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:52 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

     
  • #21   Debalina

    I demand “satistifaction” (my new favorite word) in the form of cinnamon-roll casserole immediately!

    Aug 14, 2011 at 4:56 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #21.1   The Elf

      I can’t get no satisfaction.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:11 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #22   Smokey

    I would spend whatever it takes to have the break room wall to wall desserts.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:02 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

     
  • #23   Buck

    I found this recipe for Cinnamon Roll Casserole. Sounds interesting but I think I can improve on this out of the can stuff. ;)

    http://berealmom.blogspot.com/2009/06/cinnamon-roll-casserole.html

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:03 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #24   El Jefe

    Tigers love pepper. They hate cinnamon.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:22 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #25   Get on your bikes and ride bang

    How very thoughtful of Jeff to give J– an option to continue his sinful pursuit of sharing cinnamon roll casseroles, just so long as J– wishes others to be fat and unhealthy. I would be good with that.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:27 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #26   Adriana

    I’ve been on a low-carbohydrate diet for three years and I’ve dropped 85 pounds as of today. There’s no bigger convert to the “stop eating so much fucking sugar if you want to be healthy” lifestyle than I.

    That being said, I never go around giving unsolicited advice, preaching the virtues of my diet like I have it all figured out. Ultimately, we’re all responsible for our own choices. If someone brings in unhealthy food to your workplace, the decision to eat it lies with you. It’s not someone else’s responsibility to help you fit in your skinny jeans. So, Jeff, kindly suck on my girl balls.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:30 pm   rating: 124  small thumbs up

    • #26.1   Yeah

      Congrats!

      Aug 14, 2011 at 7:55 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.2   Wilma Jo

      Amen, Adriana! Having been fat my entire life except for two years of starving myself, I say, people, you have to make your own choices. It’s entirely up to you and the world has never been more receptive (at least in my lifetime) to the choices you can have. But do NOT attempt to dictate to others – they are grownups, too, and get to make their very own personal choices.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:40 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #26.3   Sue

      Suck on my girl balls is now my motto.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:20 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #27   Kim

    Wow. I am a long-term member of Weight Watchers (lost and kept off 30 lbs for 3 years now) and I would never in a million years try to dictate my food preferences on others. Unbelieveable. Do you know how many cake parties I had to sit through at my last job? About 2 per week. Big deal. I just didn’t eat cake. Even when people pressured me I still didn’t eat it. I would just stand around with a cup of coffe and chat with everyone while they had their cake. If you have that much of an actual food addiction that you can’t handle being around some cake, then get some professional help and learn how to deal with it because life will continue to go on around you and the vast majority of people enjoy cake. Either that or go live in a cave by yourself somewhere.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:34 pm   rating: 79  small thumbs up

    • #27.1   Melissa R

      I wasn’t tempted because our office ordered the most disgusting sugar-shortening frosted cakes from the local fancy overpriced bakery. I tried to just sit with a beverage, but they all made such an issue out of it (including the President/CEO), after hundreds of no-thank-you “parties” I started taking a piece and periodically loading a bite on a fork, and then putting it back on the plate. “You’re not eating your cake, Melissa!” Ugh! What a hassle. I’d love to find a job working with reasonable adults someday.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 6:15 pm   rating: 26  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.2   ratastic

      Try saying “I’m diabetic, you dickhead.” Even if you’re not, it usually shuts them up. The brass balls of people who try to control what other grown adults eat (in any manner) just kills me.Unless you’re my spouse or my mom, you have no business trying to pressure me to eat, or not eat, anything.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 9:11 pm   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
    • #27.3   The Elf

      Heh, reasonable. Let me know how that search turns out, okay?

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:27 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #28   RedDelicious

    I say keep bringing in everything you want to bring in with a special bowl marked “Jeff” (or Supreme Dick, whichever won’t get you fired) in which something entirely healthy and probably unappealing resides (i.e., celery sticks and the like). Therefore, you’re not being discriminative. In fact, you’re giving him the opportunity to exercise self control and you prove your point.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:41 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

    • #28.1   amazon

      to go for that extra pa mile, label the tasty, unhealthy treat: “For everyone, but Jeff”

      Aug 15, 2011 at 3:55 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #29   SamIamurai

    Someone needs to force feed this guy some drugs and alcohol.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 5:46 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #30   boxes

    The submitter ought to bring in donuts or something, and write this on the box:

    “WARNING TO JEFF: SUGAR INSIDE: RESIST TEMPTATION”

    Aug 14, 2011 at 6:30 pm   rating: 33  small thumbs up

     
  • #31   havingfitz

    I work in an office full of happily fat people, myself among them. Anyone who brings in ‘healthy’ food runs the risk of possibly being eaten themselves.

    Seriously, is Jeff actually using the ‘mini-skirt defense’ on Cinnamon Roll Casserole? “The ***** was asking for it, coming on to me like that, dripping with frosting! It’s not my fault!”

    Aug 14, 2011 at 6:30 pm   rating: 83  small thumbs up

    • #31.1   Clumber

      I am now going sanctimoniously accuse everyone of using the mini-skirt defense. For anything.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 7:54 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.2   The Elf

      We need to organize a march in protest. We’ll call it the CakeWalk.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 8:03 am   rating: 40  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.3   Clumber

      ..but not too far a march, though. And downhill. And can I drive it?

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:22 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.4   Rattus

      If you drive, I’ll bring the Twinkies.

      Whoops! Sorry. Wrong defense walk/drive.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 12:00 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.5   Clumber

      Rattus – deal! I have the new Jeep, we can go anywhere!

      [and Dan White can continue to rot in hell, kthxbye.] {and I say that with as much atheist irony as I can muster}

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:22 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #31.6   pony girl

      Did someone mention a road trip?
      and Twinkies?

      *raises hoof*

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:05 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #32   Jimmy James

    Thankfully we don’t have a Jeff in our office. I love bringing cookies (and the occasional cake, pie, or bread) to work. It’s good because I like baking and trying new recipes, but I don’t want to eat a whole batch by myself. Although I like the mental image of bringing something other than a dessert, if that’s what would make Jeff happy. Just imagine pulling out a pot and some tongs, and asking your coworkers, “So, who wants spaghetti!?”

    Aug 14, 2011 at 7:45 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #32.1   makfan

      I worked in an office where we baked bread in a bread machine, roasted chickens in a convection oven and occasionally made fresh cookies. It was a really fun place to work, for the most part.

      The chicken went just as fast as the cookies.

      Aug 14, 2011 at 8:47 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #33   Yeah

    $10 says Jeff has a “good excuse” for not being in a counseling program. He cannot force everyone to accommodate him and ultimately his lack of self-control will catch up with him.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 7:54 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #34   jennyrose76

    Wow. I will never understand what gives people the impression that unsolicited “advice” is welcome and/or appreciated. “Dear Jeff, if you do not want the noms, you can just not eat them. Other people like goodies. So stop acting like the food police and nibble on a carrot stick or whatever. Sincerely, The Office.”

    Aug 14, 2011 at 8:52 pm   rating: 36  small thumbs up

     
  • #35   kimbo

    Is Jeff any sort of authority figure at this job? If not then I would promptly show up the next morning with another rich decadent treat for my co-workers to partake of. Nothing like a silent stfu to start the day.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 9:54 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #36   AnnT

    I have a thin co-worker bring the same thing up in a weekly meeting.
    I never ate the stuff that I made because I was on a low-sugar diet, but I love baking. She whined about me bringing homemade ice cream, rum soaked honey bun cakes, carrot cake, brownies, etc and it being bad for us even though she ate it too.
    The entire office was mute.
    The next week, I brought in some quinoa cooked in no sugar added apple juice and dried fruit. They were so pissed AT HER. She never spoke up again and I commenced my baking.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 10:21 pm   rating: 79  small thumbs up

    • #36.1   creamy

      Please come and work at my office, we neeeeed you.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 5:30 am   rating: 21  small thumbs up

       
    • #36.2   Lili

      If she’s thin, what the hell does she care? Shouldn’t she, being thin, be able to enjoy more treats thanks to her overall healthy lifestyle and favorable metabolism? God knows I do!

      Nothing feels as good as fat tastes so get over yourselves, dieters. Exercise, eat a moderate diet, accept yourself and let us all enjoy our lives. We only get one!

      Aug 16, 2011 at 10:53 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #37   oi

    Hey! Some us of like to eat unhealthy food and live a little, you sugar nazi twat. Go eat your spinach soup under the rock and live us alone.

    Aug 14, 2011 at 11:36 pm   rating: 17  small thumbs up

    • #37.1   sleeps

      Sugar Nazi Twat = name of my new punk band.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:24 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #38   Lucy

    My colleague (and friend) has a little chart in Excel with all her calories and protein and all that bollocks that she fills in after every meal. She goes to the gym twice EVERY DAY and has lost a shitload of weight. What pisses me off though is that every time I eat something that’s not fruit or raw vegetables she goes on at me about how many calories there are in it and how I could eat 50 of for that amount, and hell she’d have to go to the gym for like TWO HOURS if she wanted to eat it…

    So Jeff? Go fuck yourself. We don’t need anymore food police thanks.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:05 am   rating: 38  small thumbs up

    • #38.1   MandaT

      Sounds like your friend has an eating disorder. :-(

      Aug 15, 2011 at 1:57 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.2   Lucy

      Yes. A massive chip on her shoulder.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:06 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #38.3   Clumber

      The pisser thing is that counting calories in verses calories out is (arguably) the most effective way to safely lose weight. HOWEVER, much like religion, the gold stars you get by getting making yourself better are lost threefold when you try to impose your plan on anyone else.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:27 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #39   beav

    How about getting an email from a co-worker with the subject, “Quick Satisfaction”?

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:07 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #39.1   Debalina

      The best part is the spelling of “satistifaction” in the subject line. I don’t know why I love that so much! It really just rolls off the tongue.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 9:48 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #40   Dr_Know

    That dude is captain of the S.S.Douche

    Aug 15, 2011 at 4:47 am   rating: 19  small thumbs up

     
  • #41   Ivie G

    I bet when she/he saw the subject line, they thought it was sexual! I would have!

    Lucky for me, I guess, all my friends are skinny! So when I wanna dulge out on a cake, they are there for me! And when I decide that hitting 200 pounds is not good, they are there for me then too! SO no matter what I have their support and can talk to them about calorie intake or how I really wanna make sunshine cake for friday night!

    On and Jeff… fuck off!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 6:53 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #42   katie k

    Woah, the main page is so overrun with ads that the content isn’t even visible. Oh, and one just popped up over this comment box as I typed. I’m guessing this is something the ad provider is doing and not you, so I thought I’d let you know. It’s pretty bad.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 7:15 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #43   Wilma Jo

    How can you dictate what food(s) to bring and/or share with others? What is this, Russia? Keep your opinions to yourself, eat your muesli and leave other people alone! What a turd! Bet no one wants any of his damn Grape Nuts…

    Aug 15, 2011 at 7:17 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #43.1   pony girl

      Bet no one wants any of his damn Grape Nuts…

      Yeah, that’s probably why he’s so uptight.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:10 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #43.2   Lili

      Russians actually bring lots of cakes and sweets to the office. And vodka on holidays. It’s amazing the freedoms they have that we don’t.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 10:56 pm   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #44   Claudia

    I wanted to read this, but couldn’t because there was a deodorant ad over top of it. Sounds like Jeff is a real doucher though.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 7:40 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #44.1   bookworm

      Adblock plus is my BFF.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:38 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
    • #44.2   pony girl

      I use mozilla firefox and never have ads.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:11 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #45   jill

    I once worked with a person who had major control issues (not only did she try to tell me how many calories were in my Chick-Fil-A sandwich, she also told me that I was on my phone too much and that I needed to stop wearing that color shirt because it didn’t “go”) and even she wouldn’t try to tell someone else to not bring in sugar and good stuff. This Jeff guy sounds like a real douche.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 8:05 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #46   Slobber

    My coworker is slowly killing himself with a junk food addiction. Diabetes, heart attack in the office, walking around on crutches because of foot ulcers.

    But yeah, all you angry fatties are totally right, we have no right to withhold donuts from him, chastise him for sneaking candy, or discourage others from bringing in sweets that he won’t be able to resist. How dare we! We just get to watch as he destroys himself, as his body slowly quits on him and he leaves his child fatherless.

    This is America, land of the freeeeee!! You’re not the fucking boss of me!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 9:18 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #46.1   tara

      You’re right, Slobber. I’m sure he is totally unaware of what’s happening to himself… and that your “help” is going to make ALL the difference. You’re such a hero!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 9:57 am   rating: 84  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.2   bookworm

      Why are you responsible for what your co-worker is choosing to do with his own body?

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:39 am   rating: 52  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.3   Rattus

      So Slobber, I assume that you are okay with your co-workers trying to fix your personality then?

      Aug 15, 2011 at 10:53 am   rating: 71  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.4   The Elf

      Slobber, presumably you care about him. You hate to see your coworker decline, especially when he has a small child. I get it.

      But what can you do? Slap his hand when he reaches for a donut? He knows what he should and should not eat. No doubt his doctor has told him to manage his diabetes and heart condition better. Maybe he’s doing so and that donut is his once-a-week treat, already planned out in his diet. Maybe he’s just stuffing his face. You don’t know. He’s an adult, and until he decides to change, if he needs to change, nothing you can do will help.

      If you are a friend – a real friend, not a coworker friend – then you can pull him aside and have a heart-to-heart. Put it in terms of concern for his child should his illness get the best of him, not in terms of eating another damn donut when he knows he isn’t supposed to. Ask if you can help.

      If you are his boss, you can also bring up the issue. But bring it up in terms of productivity – i.e. the heart attack in the office. Say you don’t want another incident like this, you’re concerned, and offer to accomodate him so that he can tackle this issue. Ask him how the boss can help. Need an afternoon off once a week for weight watchers meetings? Rearrange the schedule. Something like that.

      No matter what, if you are the friend or boss, you say it privately, you say it nicely, you don’t even get close to the word “fat”, and you time it so that it isn’t close to any mealtime and he doesn’t have a mouthful of donut.

      But if you aren’t a friend and you aren’t his boss, then STFU. I assume Jeff is not a friend (he put it in an email) and he isn’t a boss (no whiff of authority or policy here). So he should STFU too.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:11 am   rating: 68  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.5   Clumber

      my boss (who is a douchewhistle) rides a motorcycle as often as he can. Has already had several accidents, one of which put him in hospital for weeks and off work for 2 (glorious) months. Clearly he is killing himself and you should take away his ride.

      Or I have developed a bad allergy to bees, but insist on spending as much time in the outdoors and woods as I possibly can – obviously you need to put a stop to that too.

      Grow up or at least let us be grown-ups responsible for our own decisions and STFU. If we want your advice we’ll.. who am I kidding. We’d already be sick of your advice.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:30 am   rating: 53  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.6   Jenn50

      Jeff? Is that you??

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:51 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.7   TheGnome

      As an angry fatty (okay I guess probably more of a chubby, but I like the word fat), I have to wonder what the obsession is with accusing us of eating donuts. I fucking hate donuts.

      But yes, we are right. You have no right to withhold anything from your coworker, chastise anybody for bringing in food because he may eat it, and his health isn’t everyone else’s problem. Get over yourself…Like it or not, people do indeed have the right to be fat, whether they got that way stuffing themselves with donuts or not.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 8:40 am   rating: 29  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.8   pony girl

      @slobber,

      One can eat unhealthy foods and still be fit and healthy.
      It’s called moderation.

      One can eat unhealthy foods and be fat and unhealthy.
      It’s called personal choice.

      One can also put themselves on a strict diet that makes them miserable and causes them to be jealous and lash out at people enjoying a tasty treat.

      It’s called being a sanctimonious tool.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:26 pm   rating: 47  small thumbs up

       
    • #46.9   Jalindal

      I can guarantee that he’s already getting advice from doctors, and probably being harassed by his family. It sounds like he’s in enough pain from the foot ulcers and discomfort from diabetes that his health and his weight is never far from his mind. I’m sure he’ll be *really* glad when his co-workers start laying into him as well. Unless he asks for help, you have absolutely no reason to talk to him about his weight or his eating habits. There’s absolutely no point to talking to him, unless you think that your words would be more convincing then those of his doctors or his family. It’s not like you talk to him, and he suddenly realises; “Holy shit, I really AM fat! When the fuck did that happen???”

      Aug 27, 2011 at 9:45 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #47   Zeee

    Dude’s a self-righteous a-hole.

    I’ve lost 138 pounds in the last two years, mainly by not eating sugar and chips. Sugar is MY issue – not my co-worker’s issue. Most of the people I know eat sugar. I don’t begrudge anyone (regardless of their size) for eating what they want. God knows I ate piles of sugary, fattening foods to get to my top weight. I ate it until I was ready to stop.

    I am responsible for what I eat; my co-workers and my employer are not. If someone wants to be generous and bring in something yummy to share with everyone, that’s nice. I don’t have to join in the eating, but I can join in the party.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 9:49 am   rating: 36  small thumbs up

     
  • #48   Yolanda

    Wow, that workplace is gonna see an upsurge in tasty baked goods this year!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 10:12 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #49   bookworm

    Dear Jeff: If staying away from high-calorie foods is such a struggle for you, you may as well end it now, because the rest of the world is only going to continue eating delicious high-calorie foods.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 10:24 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #50   Starfish

    I just love the fact that Jeff is associating cinnamon-rolls with crack. And – I love the poster above who thinks that anyone who doesn’t want to be treated like a petulant child by co-workers in a professional work environment is obviously “an angry fatty.”

    And – if he truly is turning into the King Henry VIII look-alike you make him out to be, not really sure what do say. You can’t give someone willpower by reinventing the world around him Truman Show style and trying to pretend the tempting foods don’t exist.

    And – I’m gluten-free and won’t piss a stink in the office and demand no one ever have sandwiches or bring treats I couldn’t eat. Would I respectfully mention for party-planning I’d be bringing my own dish to share, not to be rude, but because I had to, sure. But would I send mean emails about all the meanies not eating my fruit salad, no.

    AnnT – for me that quinoa dish sounds great – not for a dessert, but for a side dish at dinner – did you find the recipe online?

    Aug 15, 2011 at 11:03 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

    • #50.1   pony girl

      @starfish, I make an apple crisp for dessert with quinoa, agave, apples, cinnamon a little coconut oil and a little butter.
      It’s yummy!

      Aug 16, 2011 at 1:30 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #51   birdmommy

    I don’t mind people bringing high calorie sweets into work – I just wish they’d quit bringing in alcohol and drugs… and sinning outside my cubicle.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 11:36 am   rating: 35  small thumbs up

    • #51.1   Rattus

      Watching people sin outside my cubicle is infinitely preferable to actually doing what they’re paying me to do, as far as I’m concerned.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 11:54 am   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #52   Boiing

    Yeah, it’s because of all those stores that have alchohol in plain sight that people drink so much, right? Or they take heroin because people sell heroin, right? People like Jeff have no self control and blame everyone but themselves for troubles of their own making.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 12:00 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #53   Fred

    Dear Jeff,
    Instead of whining about food you don’t have to eat, perhaps you should get life so you can live that instead of running everyone else’s. Of course, that would require growing a penis, so it may take a while.
    Love, Fred.

    Dear Mar,
    Once Jeff grows that penis he can share it with you so you can finally relax.
    Love, Fred.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 12:58 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

     
  • #54   Becky

    Im a recovering alcoholic and almost every type of event I go to (family gatherings, get togethers with friends, dinners, holiday parties ect.) there is a substantial amount of drinking. Iwould NEVER send an email like this. The world doesnt revolve around me and my issues.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:02 pm   rating: 37  small thumbs up

     
  • #55   CardiFan

    When my office did our own little version of Biggest Loser, all the participants tried to sabotage one another by bringing in delicious baked goods and leaving them in the break room.

    As a non-participant in the competition, I have to say, I won.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:18 pm   rating: 53  small thumbs up

    • #55.1   Clumber

      This is WINNING, though. Plus spend the week before official starting weight eating as much salty food as possible and drinking like a camel. And imodium.

      What??! Okay, yes I am a bit competitive sure.. but… the W makes it all worth it. Plus if you get in earlier than your competitors, leaving donuts etc. on their floor is just being neighborly without identification!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 4:32 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #56   LCB

    I’m just guessing, but from the wording in the email where he mentions “pursuits you might consider as sin” that maybe, just maybe, the baker in Jeff’s office has maybe been somewhat judgmental about other behaviors – like drinking alcohol.

    I have to admit, I’d feel the same way. I’m a regular gym-goer, runner, healthy eater, etc, and I usually live and let live. But I also like the occasional drink or three, and there are people in my office who believe even just one is a sin – and they’re not shy about letting you know. Maybe Jeff has some similar officemates and is just tired of having their beliefs shoved down his throat, and he’s fighting back in a less-than-desirable way? I’m just saying – there could be some background here.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:18 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #57   Rattus

    I don’t know what ads everyone else is getting, but my sidebar is for “Private Luxury Rehab”. I may like (okay, looovvve) my baked goods, but I don’t think that rehab is required just yet.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:29 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

    • #57.1   kermit

      For what it’s worth, I’m not getting any ads because of ad-block.

      If you’re inundated with pop-ups chances are it has nothing to do with this site. Your computer may however be infected with virus/spyware so it’s probably a good idea to run a virus-removal program (even free ones such as AVG) first.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 3:30 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #58   Coworker

    This iS my office and first off J has never been judgmental towards Jeff. This is actually par for the course for Jeff. It took about 30 minutes but we finally convinced Jeff this was very rude so here is his email from later that day.

     
    From: Jeff
    Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 2:03 PM
    To: J
    Subject: apologies
     
    Hey J,
     
    I apologies for my comments earlier. It is none of my business what you do. I should not of got in to your business and I apologies. Please forgive me.
     
    Thanks,
    Jeff
     

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:39 pm   rating: 15  small thumbs up

    • #58.1   Seanette

      So he’s self-righteous, obnoxious, AND incapable of writing in English. I really hope he’s bringing some serious skills to the table or I’d be wondering why your office couldn’t find someone better, as many people as are out of work currently.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 2:52 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

       
    • #58.2   Jenn50

      Coworker: I kind of want to mail a bunch of baked goods to your office.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:56 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #59   TKD

    Brilliant! Jeff just guaranteed that the whole office would want to bring in tasty treats just to spite him. I am going to send that same note to my whole office!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 1:55 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #60   libertarian girl

    If someone wants to eat a fat casserole they can eat any kind of godamn fat casserole they want. If someone wants to eat a poison cake…they should very well be able to eat a godamn poison cake. Who the eff does Jeff think he is….everyone’s MOMMY? Piss off, Jeff and gimmee my fat casserole.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 2:57 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #61   amazon

    Alcohol is a sin? Didn’t Jesus turn water into wine?

    Aug 15, 2011 at 3:58 pm   rating: 14  small thumbs up

     
  • #62   caroline

    The main thing I got from this post: What is a cinnamon roll casserole and where can I get some????

    Aug 15, 2011 at 4:59 pm   rating: 16  small thumbs up

     
  • #63   Allan Jones Sucks

    Dear Jeff:

    Go f#ck yourself.

    Love,

    Your Office

    Aug 15, 2011 at 5:32 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #64   DarkSock

    I peed in a horse once.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 11:12 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #65   Daniel

    Dear co-worker,

    Sending out poorly edited notes only fuel some people’s addiction to ignorance and illiteracy, much the same way notes with egregious spelling errors and subject/verb agreement problems do. Please try to communicate with the same level of usage as the average 12 year-old, or risk the consequences of being mocked by everyone. Thanks,

    Aug 16, 2011 at 1:07 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

     
  • #66   Karl

    Jeff sounds like the kind of douchebag that stands at his desk all day to burn a few extra calories, when he could jog and burn a lot of calories. It’s not his fault he doesn’t like to run, it’s hot outside.

    As the great Garfield once said, “I’m not overweight, I’m under tall.” This guy sounds like he never met a fat free lasagna he didn’t like. Must be a blast at parties.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 9:16 am   rating: 6  small thumbs up

     
  • #67   mondrago

    Jeff needs a bitch slap. a few people at work bring things in from time to time. a fav of some of the guys is a tuna noodle casserole. i don’t like tuna. i am not going to fire off an angry email to the guy about his wife’s choice of food. i just don’t eat it. kinda simple. everyone gets a free lunch except me. but that is on ME, not on the guy or his wife who took the time to make it.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 9:57 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #68   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    Team Jeff all the way. He seems like a massive douche bag who enjoys imposing his will on people and gets a thrill from denying people things that give them pleasure. I like that.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 10:46 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #68.1   Daniel

      Cartman: “Wow. It’s like, it’s like, smoking brings a lot of people just a little bit of joy and, and you get to take that away from them. You are so awesome.”

      Aug 19, 2011 at 4:42 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #69   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

    Also; ‘Cinnamon Role Casserole’….is that a thing now?

    What a fascinating, modern age we live in.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 10:49 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #70   Lili

    Does cinnamon roll casserole sound a lot like bread pudding to anyone? I do like bread pudding.

    This makes me think of what I’m teaching my daughters at the table. “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. Try it, and then quietly move it to the side of your plate. If you can’t swallow that small bite, cough politely into your napkin. Don’t mention it and if someone asks if you liked it, say what you liked more. Someone worked hard to prepare that food, someone grew it, you could at least have the courtesy to keep your mouth shut.”

    I am thrilled to say that it is actually working on the older one, finally. The little one is more like Jeff but we are working on her so that by the time she is working, she will be munching baby carrots from a tiny Ziploc in her pocket.

    Or more likely, if she takes after me, gorging on cinnamon roll casserole. But if she doesn’t, she knows to shut the fuck up.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 11:04 pm   rating: 20  small thumbs up

    • #70.1   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Is a bread pudding in America the same as a bread pudding in Britain? In Britain it’s basically white bread put in a dish, maybe with some sultanas or other dried fruit if you’re feeling fancy, and then with custard poured on it and allowed to soak in and then baked. It comes out kind of like a bready creme brulée.

      Aug 27, 2011 at 4:30 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #70.2   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      Because the idea of making that using cinnamon rolls is so enticing that I’m seriously considering trying it this very afternoon.

      Aug 27, 2011 at 4:31 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #71   HAHA

    Of course the note wasn’t really passive as he did sign his name….makes it much easier to hold him down and shove one down his throat. sanctimonious asshole that he is.

    Aug 17, 2011 at 12:15 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #72   Marie

    I’d totally spend a month making a dessert-a-day for the office after a note like that! Just wait ’till Jeff ole boy gets a gander of my Bacon Candy. Mwaahahaha

    Aug 17, 2011 at 5:04 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #73   Allie

    I haven’t read ALL the comments because there are a lot of them (this is clearly a passion-inducing issue), but I’m surprised there are very few comments on the fact that Jeff is borderline illiterate on top of everything else. I’d say he’s got a lot bigger problems than fatty snacks.

    Aug 18, 2011 at 2:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #74   Starfish

    @Allie Yeah, that just kind of adds insult to injury, doesn’t it?

    Aug 18, 2011 at 8:11 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #75   Kreaper bang

    Dear Jeff,
    I will continue to eat sugar until I hallucinate. You cannot stop me.
    Thanks,
    Kreaper

    Aug 18, 2011 at 10:23 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #76   Duke

    A couple women in our office complex decided to raise money for a charity by baking and selling cupcakes. We told them of course we’d buy some. The company upstairs told them they were on a company-wide “wellness program” and they would not be allowed to sell the cupcakes to their employees…

    Aug 21, 2011 at 6:56 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #76.1   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      You mean they wouldn’t be allowed to go to the other company’s premises upstairs and sell them…because if their employees came down to buy them then that’s none of the upstairs bosses’ business.

      Aug 27, 2011 at 4:33 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #77   Fred

    I live in Alabama, and when I read this note all I could think was, “you’re not from ’round here, are you jeff”. There are some judgmental people here I admit-and that’s bad, but judging people for eating yummy food is just not something we do. We love food. Obesity is a problem, but it’s a personal problem. I can’t believe this idiot is complaining about cinnamon bun casserole and calling it a ‘sin’ ! moron

    Aug 21, 2011 at 10:32 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

    • #77.1   Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff

      In his defence – and I’m just playing Devil’s Advocate here – gluttony IS one of the seven deadly sins. Whereas boozing it up or getting stoned isn’t, so it’s all good.

      Aug 27, 2011 at 4:36 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #78   wd

    I work with a lot of overweight people who are NOT happy about it but continue to eat crappily. I’ve packed on a bit myself so I’ve gone back to a low-carb, almost vegan diet which I actually like. They roll their eyes at what I eat and say shit like “I’d rather be fat than have to eat that!” I have never once said anything about anyone’s eating habits at work–including the diabetic lady who sneaks into the breakroom to eat handfuls of any birthday cake or cookies left about. I’m not one of those dieters who yammers on about it or claims to have all the answers…so why is it okay for the non-dieters to berate my choices??

    Aug 29, 2011 at 7:52 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #79   agree with jeff

    sorry. i’m a fatty w/o much will power. this note is VERY appreciated. why would i want to go to an office where everyone’s fat and getting fatter. why enable us. i’ve noticed that it’s the people w/o weight issues that bring in the crap – and they never eat the crap they bring in. PASSIVE AGRESSIVE INDEED.

    Sep 1, 2011 at 10:51 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

    • #79.1   The Elf

      Seriously? You need someone to metaphorically slap your hand in order to avoid the cinnamon roll casserole, or to partake in it with moderation? Seriously?

      Sep 1, 2011 at 11:05 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #80   TimPundit

    Instead of blaming “enablers” why don’t you express some will power?

    Why are we attempting to curtail the happiness of others because a few people cannot control themselves. IN this situation, Jeff is a buttinski and should mind his own business…and his own waistline.

    Sep 1, 2011 at 3:05 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #81   Crabby K

    Jeff needs to take some diet pills, exercise, and stop telling other people how to take care of themselves.

    Sep 7, 2011 at 11:23 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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