This flamingo has flown

August 15th, 2011 · 34 comments

Writes Leslie in Richmond, Virginia: “The note’s creator seems to have purposely made his/her community note as undecorative as possible, but left the USA sign, flag, toadstools, ceramic rabbit, and rainbow-colored pinwheels untouched.”

Due to some low-lifed piece of crap who has been stealing my decorations for the last three months i will no longer be decorating for the various holidays any longer.

Personally, I would have liked to see if adding of few of these to the yard would have solved the problem.

related: The Circle of Hell Dante forgot to mention

FILED UNDER: gloriously redundant · holiday spirit · neighbors · Richmond · stealing


34 responses so far ↓

  • #1   neighborly

    I think her neighbors should start adding random lawn decorations each night.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 6:38 pm   rating: 75  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   Beanster

      That is a far superior method of mischief. People will WANT to get mad, but will just scratch their heads figuring out who to be pissed off at. I’m definitely going to start doing this.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:42 pm   rating: 22  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   far away

      ooh, I’d totally be all over that if I lived nearby.

      Aug 15, 2011 at 6:50 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Jimmy James

      Oh god. Imagine waking up to find your lawn covered with gnomes, all looking in your windows. Or maybe someone should get a stone angel (like in the Doctor Who episode!) and move it to different places in their yard every night.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 10:07 am   rating: 24  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.4   Caitlin S

      Jimmy, if someone put a Weeping Angel in my yard and moved it around every night, I would need to find out who had done it. They might be my new best friend after such a feat.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 12:48 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   Jack

    Ugh there’s a house on my street that is littered with yard decorations..wish I’d thought of that.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 6:39 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #2.1   The Elf

      Find another house nearby that has a different set of yard decorations.

      Then swap some of them. See if they notice.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 9:54 am   rating: 15  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.2   redheadwglasses

      I call that “yard cancer.”

      Also, there used to be a business you could call and the person would wake up to find 100 pink flamingos in his front yard. Thought about doing that to my very uptight (former) FIL.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 12:13 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

       
    • #2.3   Carrie

      I did that! With the pink Flamingos it was pretty funny to have my neighbor wake up to 1oo of them in there front yard.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 6:58 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #3   Hans Moleman

    Now that would be friggin’ hilarious!!!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 6:54 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Celeste

    Notewriter must work for the Redundancy Department of Redundancy. “NO LONGER BE DECORATING FOR THE HOLIDAYS ANY LONGER!”

    Aug 15, 2011 at 7:15 pm   rating: 23  small thumbs up

     
  • #5   Rey

    O.M.G. They live up the street from me! I guess somebody else beat me to sending this one in. I used to kind of enjoy their decorations, actually, they went all-out with lights and giant inflatable crap and everything. Kind of awesome.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 7:48 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   christine

      they live up the street from me, too! the funniest part is that they seem to think people will care… haha.. (i actually didn’t think they were all *that* great, yeah they had some stuff, but it was kind of strewn about.. maybe i’m a crankpot.. haha.)

      Aug 17, 2011 at 9:41 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   NoOneKnows

    I have been randomly leaving yard decorations at my friend’s house for 3 years and she still doesn’t know who is doing it. It’s awesome!

    Aug 15, 2011 at 8:22 pm   rating: 28  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   se

    I have to have one of those gnomes with a submachine gun

    Aug 15, 2011 at 9:40 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   meri

      Order one! I know the maker, Shawn Thorsson, and he is cranking these gnomes out to meet growing demand. Enjoy!

      Aug 15, 2011 at 9:46 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.2   TheGnome

      Sorry, I’m kind of anti-gun these days.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 8:47 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.3   unsatisfied

      ^^liberal pussy^^

      Aug 16, 2011 at 9:20 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #7.4   TheGnome bang

      You got me. I’ve always been anti-gun.

      Aug 17, 2011 at 6:28 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #8   Twez

    Missed opportunity here. Instead of the passive-aggressive note (banner, placard), the homeowner should have started booby-trapping the decorations.

    Aug 15, 2011 at 11:43 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   divaandwriter bang

      LOL! Something really greasy and hard to wash out of clothing would be best for this.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 8:45 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #8.2   redheadwglasses

      My exFIL gave his eldest son the flag he received when he retired from the military. Son, my then-spouse, hung it in our front yard. Someone stole it.

      He hung another flag. And wired electricity to the pole. No one stole that flag.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 12:15 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #9   Luna (the other one)

    A few years ago, some friends and I were going to Chicago for the weekend and stole a plastic goose as we were leaving town. We took the goose to the bar, the bowling alley, a nice restaurant… even to see the Easter bunny. Surprisingly, every place was very accommodating. Of course, we took pictures of everything and people were dying to have their picture taken with the goose. On Sunday before we came home, we made a scrapbook of “Downy’s” adventures. That night we left the goose back in its place on the lawn and left the scrapbook on the front porch. Three weeks later, I was at the library and a woman was telling the librarian about her goose theft and return and showing her the album! She was truly enjoying herself. To be fair, we lived in a very small town and this was probably the most exciting thing that had happened in a while. The point to this is – oh hell, there’s no point. I just love telling that story.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 8:30 am   rating: 45  small thumbs up

    • #9.1   Denise

      Hilarious! Although you kind of wonder if the lady was upset during his trip. Or did she even notice it was gone lol

      Aug 16, 2011 at 9:15 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #9.2   Luna (the other one)

      She didn’t seem the sort to get upset. Some don’t mind, some get really worked up about it. Once I moved a neighbor’s little dutch boy and dutch girl on a bridge (complete with the “No Trespassing Sign” tacked to it) from one side of their lawn to the other in the middle of the night. The next morning, I got up to see a squad car in front of their house. I am still amazed that they called the cops for that. I’m sure the cops were, too.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 9:31 am   rating: 18  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #10   Allan Jones Sucks

    Luna — That’s awesome! I want to do that. Must find neighbor with goose.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 9:29 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   The Elf

      While it is kinda awesome, you’d have to pick your neighbor carefully. Say, one who doesn’t own a shotgun, since you would be trespassing and stealing. I don’t know about the rest of you, but if I saw someone skulking about my yard, I ‘m going to assume a more nefarious purpose and react accordingly.

      Aug 16, 2011 at 9:59 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #10.2   Luna (the other one)

      I agree, Elf. But timing seems to be the key. The majority of my hijinks occurred at an hour when I was unlikely to garner the attention of my neighbor. And it wasn’t really stealing… more like borrowing. :)

      Aug 16, 2011 at 10:45 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   TKD

    After decades of trying to quietly slip away in the night, a faction of gnomes has decided to take more aggressive action. The theft of lawn decorations will continue until gnome oppression is stopped. They are armed and willing to face shattering for their cause.

    Vive la Libération!

    Aug 16, 2011 at 10:18 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   CaptainC

    The obvious solution would be to get even uglier and tacky decorations, like the bigfoot from SkyMall.

    Aug 16, 2011 at 3:38 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   Aim

    I would plant the garden zombie from ThinkGeek on her lawn to give her the fear of the undead who prefer hoarding garden decorations prior to eating brains.

    See: http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/zoom/e557_garden_zombie.jpg

    Aug 17, 2011 at 10:01 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   redheadwglasses

      Aim! My best friend just bought a house last week! I must order this for their backyard!

      Aug 17, 2011 at 12:23 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #13.2   Melissa R

      Yuck, that doesn’t look anything like a zombie!

      Aug 20, 2011 at 7:25 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   redheadwglasses

    Re: moving lawn decor: How about moving everything just a few inches at a time, each day, incrementally unnoticeable!

    Aug 17, 2011 at 12:22 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     

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