J.T. got a kick out of this permission slip, which his co-worker had to sign before her 17-year-old son was allowed to go the first high school dance of the year. (Apparently “leave room for Jesus” just doesn’t cover it these days.)
I’m loving the concept of “dance detention,” but the name of the high school is really the cherry on top.
related: You looking pretty is clearly more important than our friendship!
extra credit: The world’s largest dance detention performance [youtube]
99 responses so far ↓
#1
Alise
Would be lovely if the fundies spent as much time worrying about correct grammar as they did about appropriate dancing. “other then”? Really?
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:39 pm rating: 90
#2
Debra
Liberty High School’s name is tragically ironic.
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:42 pm rating: 90
#3
pony girl
So, I guess there’s no swing dancing allowed.
No dipping, no tango?
Are they allowed to look at members of the opposite sex while dancing?
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:44 pm rating: 90
#4
Melissa
In my defense, I thought my date’s boob was an entirely appropriate place for my hand.
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:44 pm rating: 90
#5
Kara
Hard to take anything seriously that comes from a school that doesn’t know the difference between “then” and “than.”
If I were those kids, I’d boycott and go have a kegger in the woods instead.
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:45 pm rating: 90
#6
Erica
The grammatical errors are truly the cherry on top. How about you make sure your school staff knows when to use “then” versus “than” and that “can not” is one word, not two. It seems superfluous to be so exacting with the dance rules while the English language is being butchered and no one gives a damn.
Aug 16, 2011 at 6:56 pm rating: 90
#7
Phil McKracken
I teach in a high school. Last homecoming, after the dance, there were 2 pairs of panties found on the corners of the dance floor. If you want to have sex, just do it in the parking lot like everyone else.
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:04 pm rating: 90
#8
Alexis
I like “no bending over” .
How fun would it be, as a parent, to send the permission slip back with corrections made in red pen. That’s something I would do.
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:21 pm rating: 90
#9
Don
I see nothing wrong with this. They don’t want any “dirty dancing” and they are making the students and their parents aware of this ahead of time.
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:27 pm rating: 90
#10
Chad
My irony meter just exploded.
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:34 pm rating: 90
#11
Michael
I’m curious about “increased disciplinary consequences”. WTF?
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:41 pm rating: 90
#12
bookworm
“No grinding or other dancing that implies any sexual activity or motion.”
So, no dancing then.
Aug 16, 2011 at 7:46 pm rating: 90
#13
Quite Contrary
If I pay for a student removed for inappropriate dancing, and do not receive a student removed for inappropriate dancing, I want a refund, dammit!
Aug 16, 2011 at 8:10 pm rating: 90
#14
Quite Contrary
Is it a good guess that J.T. lives in Michelle Bachmann’s Minnesota district?
Aug 16, 2011 at 8:12 pm rating: 90
#15
Baby
Apparently some of you haven’t seen the ‘new’ dirty dancing. The girl bends over with her hands on the floor and the guy is behind her pelvic thrusting like he’s giving it to her from behind. I’m assuming that’s why the letter says ‘no bending over’ and no body parts on the floor other than your feet.
Aug 16, 2011 at 9:07 pm rating: 90
#16
bibberly
Now that I have chaperoned a high school dance (not to mention several high school football games) and worked at a high school for five years, this totally seems reasonable.
For a while, they were discouraging this sort of dancing at my school by doing a lot of the dances that have specific steps, like Soulja Boy and the Cha-Cha Slide. No one grinds during those type of dances.
Aug 16, 2011 at 9:28 pm rating: 90
#17
pony girl
Bad dance you!
Aug 16, 2011 at 9:54 pm rating: 90
#18
Diane
I would love to know if this came from Liberty in Bethlehem, PA. If it did, this is the biggest waste of time and laughable piece of crap. That school is practically a training facility for criminals. The number of shootings, stabbings, and bloody fist fights alone is ridiculous. Then add in the drug busts, sexually inappropriate behavior from both students and staff, and the fact that 50% of the yearbook can be labeled “Most Likely To Work A Lifetime At McDonald’s”, while the other 50% can be labeled “Most Likely To Be Incarcerated For Most Of His/Her Life”.
If it’s a different Liberty, well, then good for them for trying to obtain and maintain decency.
Aug 16, 2011 at 10:02 pm rating: 90
#19
Katie Mariie
When I first read “dance detention,” I was expecting detention where the kids are forced to dance. Which would be awesome. I think there would have been much fewer kids late to class at my high school, if they knew they would have to do the hokey pokey in front of their peers.
Aug 16, 2011 at 10:48 pm rating: 90
#20
John the Baptist
I grew up Southern Baptist, so I can tell this joke, OK? It seems appropriate in this instance.
Q: Why do Southern Baptists not have sex standing up?
A: They wouldn’t want anyone to think they were dancing!
Aug 16, 2011 at 11:06 pm rating: 90
#21
Yeah
*No thans other than “then” should be used.
Aug 16, 2011 at 11:31 pm rating: 90
#22
Matth
♪ We can dance, we can dance
♪ Everybody look at your hands
Aug 17, 2011 at 4:21 am rating: 90
#23
Smokey
♪♪♪♪♪Everybody cut, everybody cut, everybody cut FOOTLOOSE!♪♪♪♪♪♪
Aug 17, 2011 at 4:41 am rating: 90
#24
MD
I believe, after careful study of these rules, even ‘I’m A Little Teapot’ is a filthy bit of nasty.
“…tip me over and pour me out…
Indeed.
Whore.
Aug 17, 2011 at 7:30 am rating: 90
#25
crzygrl
i actually recieved this notice for my child who goes to this school too. funny!
Aug 17, 2011 at 8:04 am rating: 90
#26
ren
From the oldest of times, people danced for a number of reasons. They danced in prayer… or so that their crops would be plentiful… or so their hunt would be good. And they danced to stay physically fit… and show their community spirit. And they danced to celebrate. And that is the dancing we’re talking about. Aren’t we told in Psalm 149 Praise ye the Lord. Sing unto the Lord a new song. Let them praise His name in the dance? And it was King David – King David, who we read about in Samuel – and what did David do? What did David do?
What *did* David do?
David danced before the Lord with all his might… leaping and dancing before the Lord.
[smacks table in front of Reverend Moore]
*Leaping* and *dancing*.
Ecclesiastes assures us… that there is a time for every purpose under heaven. A time to laugh… and a time to weep. A time to mourn… and there is a time to dance. And there was a time for this law, but not anymore. See, this is our time to dance. It is our way of celebrating life. It’s the way it was in the beginning. It’s the way it’s always been. It’s the way it should be now.
Aug 17, 2011 at 8:27 am rating: 90
#27
Sara
“No grinding or other dancing that implies any sexual activity or motion.”
So, if a chaperone calls me out for something that implies sexual activity, can I then call her out for knowing what that even looks like?
Aug 17, 2011 at 8:43 am rating: 90
#28
Jen
I’m as sexually liberal as they come. However, having taught at a high school and chaperoned mixers, I’m totally on board with this. Folks, there is precious little of what most of us would call “dancing” going on at these things. If I saw two kids swing dancing or, hell, even dirty dancing with as much style as Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey, I’d probably call attention to them for doing something right. As it is, the kids either do the f*ck-her-from-behind version or they’re dry-humping face-to-face. As fun as it is to make comparisions to the “scandalous” waltz, it ain’t even close. At least the waltz had steps.
The sad thing is, the kids who don’t feel comfortable either faux-screwing or getting faux-plowed on the “dance” floor can’t dance unless they already know their partner and everyone’s okay with the usual stiff-armed sway we all did in our day. “Do you want to dance?” is hard enough for some kids to ask — adding the subtext of “Do you want me to grind my crotch into your butt” makes it damn near impossible for them. And some of the girls don’t want to get out on the floor at all because they don’t want random boys coming up behind them. Mixer-as-orgy is not a good development for the wallflowers.
The second sad thing is, if somebody did start swing dancing or break dancing or any of the other suggestions in the previous comments, I promise there is at least one jerk student who would come up to the chaperones and challenge them to either shut the talented kid(s) down or let everyone else resume their mass orgy. And as a chaperone, I don’t know what I would do. The third and most sad thing is, it’s a moot point because I’ve never seen any kids who’ve ever tried to dance for real.
Aug 17, 2011 at 9:19 am rating: 90
#29
Allan Jones Sucks
Wow. If I had to remind my high-school-aged child not to bend over or grind their partner, I might re-think the whole dance altogether.
Aug 17, 2011 at 10:23 am rating: 90
#30
Splint Chesthair
My high school had various functions with rules indicating that, if broken, you wouldn’t be allowed to leave campus until you’re parents came to get you.
I always daydreamed about how they would try to stop me. Did they have tasers? Would they tackle me? If they called the cops, I’d be long gone before they got there and exactly what law would I have broken?
Aug 17, 2011 at 10:54 am rating: 90
#31
The Elf
What, no moshing?
Aug 17, 2011 at 11:19 am rating: 90
#32
redheadwglasses
I assume this school dance also won’t feature Billy Idol’s version of “Mony Mony.”
Aug 17, 2011 at 12:27 pm rating: 90
#33
pizza
I would have thought this was silly until I recently saw my 5 year old niece “grind” her brother because the other 5 year olds in her “urban” pre-school dance that way.
Aug 17, 2011 at 1:24 pm rating: 90
#34
QBALL
“I give it a 10 Mr Clark, it’s got a great beat and I can really appreciate my girls bootylicous kardashian tush plus” Remember Purdy Missouri? wow what a country
Aug 17, 2011 at 2:09 pm rating: 90
#35
bad mood
I’ll never forget the rainy Sunday I spent watching the Swayze classic Dirty Dancing on tv. My grandmother, may she rest in peace lived with us and she came into the living room during the party scene where Baby’s got the watermelon. She wistfully said, “Your grandfather and I used to dance like that back when we were young.”
Apparently, this has been a problem since the 40′s!
Aug 17, 2011 at 3:03 pm rating: 90
#36
Ori
Did these people never see Grease? Isn’t that how high school is supposed to be?
Aug 17, 2011 at 3:25 pm rating: 90
#37
Xyzzy
Have to agree with people pointing out that it’s not the kind of “dancing” we might expect… I did a little video searching based on things I’d read before (one popular form is called “freak dancing” or “freakin”) and found quite a few dances like this, for example:
http://youtu.be/IwL7QyYbH6I
I can definitely see where a school would rather not have the students doing anything quite *that* suggestive.
Aug 18, 2011 at 12:44 am rating: 90
#38
Homeslice
We never had these problems back in my day. The early 90s New Jack Swing dance moves took care of everything. You can’t dry hump anyone when you Roger Rabbit and do the Running Man. The only touching was that “Kid n Play” ankle bump.
Aug 18, 2011 at 11:29 am rating: 90
#39
J.T.
I’m the J.T. that posted this – this is from Liberty High School in Brentwood, CA – - in the San Francisco Bay Area!!!!
Aug 18, 2011 at 12:42 pm rating: 90
#40
kasey
I totally understand this notice. My school dances looked like terrifying mating rituals. And I’m pretty sure at least a few girls left pregnant.
Aug 18, 2011 at 1:47 pm rating: 90
#41
Lenny!
I’m sorry but I would have to agree with this note… I remember the reason why I ditched my dances back in the day was because, besides the shitty music they played (which encouraged the “freak dancing”), almost every guy decided it was free game to grab and rub against girls who didn’t want to participate in the mating game (like me).
Aug 18, 2011 at 6:22 pm rating: 90
#42
Anonymous
So if anyone drops their wallet, they’re out of the dance. Understood.
Aug 18, 2011 at 8:24 pm rating: 90
#43
Earl Hamsher
maybe this is a prop from the new Footloose remake
Aug 19, 2011 at 1:13 am rating: 90
#44
Lololol
Is it funny, that this school is one in my district?
Also even more ironic is the other school, Freedom High School. We have the same rules only stricter.
Sep 1, 2011 at 10:25 pm rating: 90
#45
emmalee
is this school in westminster, md? i think i’ve heard of it..
Oct 6, 2011 at 9:14 pm rating: 90
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