Option a) “Hey, Iva, could you buy some TP? We’re out.”
Option b) Several weeks of seething funneled into eight six colored markers’ worth of heart exclamation point smiley THREAT heart heart.
And the winner is…
Gee, Bell, that IS funny, cuz you really threw me off with that “I hope you had a nice day!! <3 
” shit. (I’M ACTUALLY KIDDING. I WILL CUT YOU.)
related: One sure sign your roommate situation isn’t working out?
117 responses so far ↓
#1
Rhamza
I only see 7 different colors of marks there, where did PAN.com get 8? just wondering…
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:11 pm rating: 1
#2
wow
wow
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:15 pm rating: 1
#3
JetJackson
Come 2032 we will have the 3 seashells and this problem will be redundant.
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:26 pm rating: 35
#4
Tara
People like this are so creepy. They think they’re sparing their roommate’s feelings but snitty little messages like this are so much more telling of a person’s true character than if they just straight up said “it’s your turn to buy the toilet paper this week, thanks.”
We ran out of toilet paper in my apartment this week and, guess what, my roommate nicely asked me if I could buy it this time and I said sure, no problem and promptly did! Maybe I’m just living in a parallel universe where people are normal and civil to each other? I swear guys, such a place exists.
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:32 pm rating: 87
#5
Melissa
Is Heather and Heath the same person?
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:59 pm rating: 2
#6
shesajem
wow she really took the time to use different colours and also be an asswhole.
Sep 21, 2011 at 10:59 pm rating: 4
#7
shwo!
Each personality gets its own color.
Sep 21, 2011 at 11:03 pm rating: 77
#8
Mel
I hate both of these type of roommates. Try to avoid writing a stupid/rude note with markers like you’re some primary education major. For the other type of roommate: if possible, try and help out! Contribute by helping to buy basic items like tissue and toilet paper–or buy your own! Simple as that. Or wipe your butt with this note. THAT would be hilarious.
Sep 21, 2011 at 11:45 pm rating: 28
#9
galesburgbrat
I can understand the concept – I share a bathroom with the person in the next apartment over… and I have written a note asking that he not use MY toilet paper. But the situation is a bit different than this one, as we don’t dwell in the same living area and I don’t see him every day (or at all, even). Plus my bum is special and refuses to tolerate Dollar Tree type TP so I buy the expensive stuff and get pissy when it’s used by those not in my family! In this situation, as someone already pointed out, a simple “your turn to buy” is all that’s really necessary!
Sep 21, 2011 at 11:47 pm rating: 3
#10
dejahthoris
How much you wanna bet Iva will have to wipe her ass with that note
Sep 22, 2011 at 12:14 am rating: 5
#11
tch tch
When I was a kid we used gum leaves if we were out in the never never. Young green leaves are best – old ones can get a bit scratchy.
Sep 22, 2011 at 1:16 am rating: 9
#12
TinyBallOfLight
Well, I’m sorry, but Bell is a huge hypocrite. She leaves nasty notes for Iva saying she hadn’t contributed, but apparently Heath hasn’t contributed yet either. You don’t see Heath getting nasty notes from Bell and Heather. Only Iva is being threatened. Hmph. Favoritism.
Sep 22, 2011 at 3:14 am rating: 6
#13
Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff
Wait…do girls wipe after they pee? I mean, now that I think about it, it makes sense. I’ve just never thought about it before, because the male anatomy makes it unnecessary. This post has opened my eyes anew.
EDIT: I mean that he male anatomy makes wiping after peeing unnecessary, not that the male anatomy makes thinking unnecessary.
Sep 22, 2011 at 4:28 am rating: 44
#14
emcd
Note writer only mentions pooping, peeing and hand washing in the note. Will there be a separate note concerning snot and use of the tissues from the “giant tissue box”? I can only hope!!
Sep 22, 2011 at 9:20 am rating: 11
#15
Cognitive Dissenter
Hilarious!
Sep 22, 2011 at 9:21 am rating: 0
#16
Laura
Sorry, but I’m on team PA-note-writer. If you’ve ever had roommates, you know how infuriating it is when they try to be cheap bastards and refuse to buy common use items just so that they don’t have to spend the money on it. And how infuriating it is when you tell them to buy their shit several times and they don’t listen.
Sep 22, 2011 at 9:32 am rating: 13
#17
Murpedo
She only uses black when she wants to print in block capitals. Black is the SERIOUS COLOUR.
Sep 22, 2011 at 10:30 am rating: 27
#18
unsatisfied
iva, heather/heath and bell?
what the hell kind of names are these?
Sep 22, 2011 at 10:31 am rating: 13
#19
Kate
Back up there.
It is inferred in this note that they are drying their hands on paper towels.
That is just massively wasteful.
Sep 22, 2011 at 12:17 pm rating: 16
#20
Brian H
I understand being peeved with someone not chipping in or what but to cart your roll fm room to bathroom? That’s too much, just ask the person to steal the TP from the university library like everyone else.
Sep 22, 2011 at 1:40 pm rating: 6
#21
unsatisfied
these guys think they have problems?!??
facebook just changed its layout!!!
it’s chaos, I tell ya!
Sep 22, 2011 at 3:12 pm rating: 11
#22
Sidney
I hate all three people living in the house just based on that note.
Sep 22, 2011 at 7:09 pm rating: 0
#23
Poison
Some people are just naturally clueless and don’t realize/remember who bought what or when it is their turn. I had a roommate like this. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to contribute – but she would forget. It was nothing to get upset about. Usually we’d just say, “Hey —-, can you get (dish soap) on your way home.” No big deal.
At the same time, however, I did live with an infuriating roommate who made our lives a living hell. And she was VERY passive aggressive. In fact, I wish I would have known about this website two years ago so I could have posted all the weird notes she would leave lying around – much like this one! I just used to write, “F—- you” on them and leave them on her bed. If she couldn’t come and talk to us about it, I didn’t listen to her. When she would come home, I would tell her, “I left your note on your bed. I told you that I wasn’t going to read them if you couldn’t be an adult and come and talk to us about these things. So, what did you have a problem with?”
One problem was stuff like this.We all agreed to share common things like milk and eggs to save room in the fridge. Bitchy Roommate (BR) would ALWAYS use all of the milk and not replace it. It got to the point where my other roommate and I were each buying a gallon a week.
We brought this up to BR. Just asking her if she could buy some milk… that’s it! She then said, “I bought it last time!” We had to correct her. She sulked. Then she started counting and measuring everything to an obnoxious degree. Toilet paper was one thing. She’d buy a huge pack of toilet paper – and then refuse money when we’d offer to help with the cost. It made her feel “superior” that SHE bought the toilet paper. Then she’d throw it in our faces when we would tell her that it was her turn to buy milk or something. Or complain, loudly, on the phone to her boyfriend that WE never bought the toilet paper – when the huge pack that she bought had lasted the entire month.
We finally just started buying everything separate because she was making us want to rip our hair out with her passive aggressive games.
…There was much much more. Horrible memories… I think I’m still a little psychologically scarred from living with her (not just over toilet paper and milk). My other former roommate and I still talk about the outright crazy stuff that she did to us.
Sep 22, 2011 at 9:15 pm rating: 16
#24
Lorel
Why all the happy faces and hearts? is Bell trying to pretend she’s not a bitch?
Sep 23, 2011 at 7:21 am rating: 9
#25
The Elf
Why is it that whenever I read this note, I hear it in the voice of GLaDOS? Next she’ll offer us cake and tell us of the day she saw a deer.
Taking a dump without TP: now you’re thinking with portals.
Sep 23, 2011 at 9:39 am rating: 7
#26
Amy in Toronto
@ The Elf: I love you for that comment.
Sep 23, 2011 at 1:24 pm rating: 0
#27
Anygirl
Just a thought for all of you out there who seem to been quick to jump the gun on the note writer here. It’s very easy in this situation to critisize her for being harsh or snippy with her breif note but you have to take into account that there are people and i know some for sure who simply CHOOSE NOT TO RESPOND to even the nice or persistant but kind reminders. Almost everyone seems to be assuming that “Bell” just decided to sit down and write a note like this because they didnt have any TP left and she thought it would get the job done. Sure she and “Heather” could have bought there own stuff and kept it but thats not really the point obviously that is going to be the outcome either way. What people fail to give her credit for is the fact that this roomate could be completely unbotherd by the fact that the other girls pay for everything and she could very well have just been useing what was there and not giving two shits that the other girls probably told her a couple times they were running low on the bathroom nessesities.
Sep 26, 2011 at 12:30 am rating: 5
#28
Anygirl
What if in this case Iva is in fact being increadibly selfish maybe in this instance she is finally geting the respose she deserves and coincidentaly the one she might have egged on “Belle” into giving her. There are lots of individuals who can make even the happiest most level headed person insane and frusterated with ther inability to cooperate or pitch in.
Sep 26, 2011 at 12:39 am rating: 2
#29
Anygirl
Ah yes because im aparently the only other indovodual whos been in this situation i must in fact be the writer of the note. Fortunately im not, ive had to deal with a similar situation thankfully it was only for a breif period of time.
Sep 26, 2011 at 11:24 am rating: 2
#30
YAR
OUST THE FREE-RIDERS !!!
Oct 1, 2011 at 5:56 pm rating: 1
#31
Susan
Gotta say — while I don’t get the six shades of magic marker, my sympathies are more with the person who left the note than with the person who received it. Haven’t we all lived with the person who never, ever, ever bought the jointly used supplies like toilet paper? Sure, the note-leaver could have spoken directly to the jerk who never buys toilet paper. But out of the two evils, the jerk who never contributes is by far the worse. It should be *obvious* that you buy toilet paper once in a while. No one should have to point it out.
I may be extra sympathetic because I did try to directly confront a roommate who never did any cleaning and never bought toilet paper and paper towels. To top it off, she had a cat and never changed the litter box. When I confronted her, she insisted that it wasn’t true that she never cleaned or bought stuff. I challenged her to name the last time she’d done either. She couldn’t. We had an enormous fight. I moved out as soon as I could afford the first month/last month rent on a new apartment.
The moral is — when someone is jerk enough to do something that is obviously wrong, or not do something that is obviously right, confronting them politely often doesn’t do a damn thing. That only works when you’re dealing with a nice person who genuinely wants to be inoffensive and cooperative.
Oct 2, 2011 at 1:06 pm rating: 1
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