Writes Heather in Kentucky: “I keep a basket of candy on my desk, but after having my candy basket completely cleaned out during the night shift on several occasions, I started locking it in my boss’s office overnight.”
A few mornings later, she arrived at her desk to find this oh-so-thoughtful note from one sugar-deprived night-shift worker.
![Heather, Hope your [sic] feeling better! Noticed your candy basket is missing so I got you a new one to fill.](http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4057/4583229078_a6456e1219.jpg "Heather, Hope your [sic] feeling better! Noticed your candy basket is missing so I got you a new one to fill.")
related: This is a candy-optional office
111 responses so far ↓
#1
Dr. Chalkwitheringlicktacklefeff
This one made me chuckle. It’s not passive-aggressive though; it’s just cheeky banter.
Oct 31, 2011 at 2:48 pm rating: 14
#2
Clifton Griffin
I love how irrational, hunger driven line of reasoning here. How likely was it that the absence of candy was due to a missing candy basket?
Oct 31, 2011 at 2:55 pm rating: 37
#3
ClearlyDemented
Ten bucks says the notewriter also bought himself several bags of candy while he was purchasing that, but decided to keep them all for himself, rationalizing that buying the bucket was more than enough of a contribution.
Oct 31, 2011 at 2:56 pm rating: 88
#4
Berva
It’s like feeding a stray cat: once you start, you can’t stop, OR ELSE.
A friend of mine once told me the story of her coworker, Jack, an amiable fellow who always brought candy to the office for his coworkers. (Kind of like Dexter and the donuts, only without the serial murders. AS FAR AS I KNOW.) One day, Jack forgot to bring the candy, and people kept coming to his desk, giving him shitty looks, and leaving without a word. Eventually, someone confronted him while he was on the phone with a client, bellowing, “Where’s the fuckin’ CANDY, JackASS?”
Better off without, perhaps.
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:01 pm rating: 149
#5
Ms Medieval
Been there! I thought I’d be the “cool” person in the office & put out a candy dish……. who kept eating them then demanding more? The managers who get insane salaries I can’t even imagine. The nerve!
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:01 pm rating: 66
#6
smussyolay
and it’s a HUGE halloween pumpkin that kids take trick-or-treating. are you KIDDING me? ridic.
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:05 pm rating: 6
#7
Steve
… and in the Gift of the Halloween Magi, Heather left her candy in a pile on the floor, and the unwitting night crew Hoovered it.
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:08 pm rating: 10
#8
Marsha Mason
Normally I just laugh at the daily passive aggressive notes…but this one actually makes me mad. The presumptuousness of it is actually annoying me. Like Heather should leave a note on it saying “If you would like to store your candy in here, please feel free! I don’t mind at all. But be forewarned I’m going to eat most of it even though it isn’t mine!”
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:09 pm rating: 94
#9
Suzi
She should totally plant celery or summat in that, then leave it on her desk with a note apologising for contributing to the obvious obesity issues of the phantom candy-addict, and promising to leave nothing but healthy options for the midnight munchies in future.
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:21 pm rating: 75
#10
pony girl
That handwriting alone is enough to piss me off.
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:28 pm rating: 23
#11
Amanda
Wow. Just wow.
Got entitlement?
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:45 pm rating: 17
#12
infanttyrone
Misuse of “your”…$.08333
Unselfconscious ‘i’ without even a cutesy heart
or starbursty adornment…A big wad of moolah, Daddy-O
Not bothering to sign it because you know that
Heather will know who wrote it…Priceless
Oct 31, 2011 at 3:54 pm rating: 8
#13
Shannon
I’d leave a note telling the night shift to either start filling up the candy bucket or to shove it up their ungrateful arses, that candy is a privilege and not a right.
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:02 pm rating: 12
#14
Winkie
Ha! I’m the candy lady at my office. I find that if I line the bottom of the bowl with some gross/foreign/scary-seeming candies, the bowl is never empty, so no-one can complain.
Although I can’t for the life of me figure out why no one wants the chili-powder coated mango lollies? Those are my favorite!
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:03 pm rating: 95
#15
Mr. Squirrel
I can totally imagine this as a lolcat.
I CAN HAS MOAR CANDY. HER IZ BUKKIT 2 FILL.
Everyone knows cats are entitled assholes.
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:07 pm rating: 48
#16
gus
If she takes a dump in there, think the night crew will get the hint?
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:26 pm rating: 46
#17
Quite Contrary
For anyone who may be new to this site, the definition of a passive aggressive note is an unsigned “hope you’re feeling better” note.
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:30 pm rating: 14
#18
Sean Jungian
The only person who notices when I run out of candy at my office is my son, who stops in after school to walk home with me. When I have it, people eat it, and when I don’t have it I don’t hear anything about it.
This note actually did make me laugh. I like the assumptions the night crew is making here.
Oct 31, 2011 at 4:47 pm rating: 4
#19
Dalamara
At my last job, my supervisor had a year round candy bucket, but all the girls in the front office would occasionally contribute to it. Sure, we weren’t the only ones that ate out of it, but it was much easier to keep it mostly full with 6 of us contributing instead of 1.
Interestingly enough the boss over her also had a candy jar, but no one ever went in her office for it lol!
Oct 31, 2011 at 5:29 pm rating: 3
#20
TJB
As funny as this note is, it really makes me angry…being a receptionist with a candy jar that gets ravaged within the first hour of it being filled, I sympathize with poor Heather.
Oct 31, 2011 at 5:52 pm rating: 25
#21
Old Uncle Toe
Dear co-worker, thank you. What a treat, after being out for several days with this cold, to come back to a nice new wastebasket in which to put my used tissues…
Oct 31, 2011 at 7:07 pm rating: 38
#22
Larry Sheldon
I got rid of my candy jar when OI got a formal complaint to my boss about the fact that it had not been refilled while I was on vacation.
Oct 31, 2011 at 8:14 pm rating: 73
#23
Larry Sheldon
And when I had hit the candy dish at the PT shope several times, I bought a bag of candy and left it.
Oct 31, 2011 at 8:16 pm rating: 3
#24
Spooky
I’m going the other way here, Heather: so you’ll give out free candy to all your nattery time-wasting co-workers about whom you probably complain with some regularity (we all do), but no free sweets to the underpaid guys and gals who clean up your tissues and *candy wrappers*?
Oct 31, 2011 at 9:02 pm rating: 2
#25
juju_skittles
I work at a women’s health centre. I have condoms on my desk. Never get PAN about it though when it’s empty…
Oct 31, 2011 at 9:40 pm rating: 15
#26
Canthz_B
No smiley face, no candy.
Etiquette, People…etiquette.
Oct 31, 2011 at 10:14 pm rating: 7
#27
it's naptime
I’m wondering if the lotion bottle is also a contribution toward making her “peel” better.
Oct 31, 2011 at 11:01 pm rating: 0
#28
Canthz_B
Heather mixes it with love and makes it all taste goo-…HEY! GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY CANDY BUCKET!!
Nov 1, 2011 at 12:50 am rating: 5
#29
Nunavut Guy
Mongo like candy.
Nov 1, 2011 at 6:43 am rating: 7
#30
The Elf
As much as it would make my blood boil to see a note like this after providing free candy to coworkers, I have to say this: do not mess with the night shift.
Best fill that pumpkin before they turn on you, Heather.
Nov 1, 2011 at 9:54 am rating: 9
#31
Matilda
I used to be the one filling up the candy bowl but then we ran out & my boss said, “Why can’t you keep this bowl full?” & my response was, “Give me a raise or start paying for the candy yourself.” That shut him up.
Nov 1, 2011 at 10:27 am rating: 42
#32
divaandwriter
Heather should leave the empty pumpkin basket on her desk and attach the following note:
Dear Incredibly Arrogant Jerkface:
It is not my job to feed the sugar cravings of every employee here at my own expense. However, it seems that I have been doing just that.
It is now your turn. If you go to your local Costco, Walgreens, Stop & Shop or 99 Cents Store you will find lots of big bags of candy. Please buy some and fill this up yourself.
You will not be reimbursed and you will be lucky if even one person offers to help out by contributing anything. However, you will have a lot of company, because people will be constantly coming to your desk to reach their hands into the candy dish and help themselves.
And oh yes … if you ever decide to stop putting out candy for the whole world, you will have to endure complaints, remarks and stupid notes from people whose sense of entitlement is not to be believed.
Heather
Nov 1, 2011 at 2:01 pm rating: 27
#33
Hanna
WTF??? The nerve.
Nov 1, 2011 at 5:45 pm rating: 2
#34
Dina
Lol… I had a colleague once who’d search every desk and cabinet in every office for sweets. It was a real arm’s race between him and the rest of us. The funniest thief however was a little mouse we knew lived behind the cabinets. We once left an open pack of Oreos on a desk. When I returned in the evening and switched on the lights, I saw the mouse sitting in the tray, clutching a cookie. It tried to run but wasn’t really fast anymore. I cleaned up the crumbs, left another cookie and put the rest away. The next morning that cookie was gone, too.
Nov 1, 2011 at 6:09 pm rating: 12
#35
Adam
This note has made me realize what a jerk I’ve been regarding the candy bowl situation in my office. Tomorrow on the way to work I’m going to buy some candy to give the two people with desks near me who keep candy dishes accessible to everyone.
Nov 1, 2011 at 10:30 pm rating: 52
#36
Yolanda
As an underpaid night cleaner I confess my guilt to the sin of eating other people’s candy. I do want to say, however, I never took more than 15% of the total amount present and if there was too little to make such a choice I backed off. Nobody, however, offered a communal candy jar in that place except during special occasions. In that case it was placed by the door, not on a desk, and when empty put away till next time. I think perhaps folks who do not like giving away candy should learn to use an opaque jar or put it away so it is not out there triggering desire on sight and implying generosity.
Oh, and night cleaning does take a lot of energy so it’s not hard to see how they might have gone too far.
Nov 2, 2011 at 2:09 pm rating: 7
#37
Lunatic Fringe
This makes me want to buy a candy jar and fill it with disgusting candy. Then we’ll see who wants to gobble it down. I’m going to buy a bunch of salmiakki- hahaha!
Nov 3, 2011 at 9:48 am rating: 1
#38
Devi
I AM the night crew at my office, and I’m the one who fills the candy bowl for the day crews!
Nov 4, 2011 at 2:55 am rating: 4
#39
Seitensprung
Glad to be a freelancer and have my candy just for me.
Herb Seitensprung
Nov 6, 2011 at 4:48 am rating: 1
#40
sarah
aw this one kinda made me sad. maybe the candy basket is the only thing that brightens up his night? why not keep the basket and spread a little cheer. sometimes its the little things to look forward to that help people get through.
Nov 8, 2011 at 12:18 am rating: 1
#41
Shivs
I’m not about read 103 comments but I hope I’m not the only one who thinks it’s tacky as sh*t to put an entire basket of candy in plain view and then police how much people eat. Put your stash in a drawer if it’s for you only. If it’s for everyone, be glad you’re making someone’s night shift better. Whiner…
Nov 9, 2011 at 7:48 pm rating: 1
#42
Ray A.
I hope that YOU’RE working the night shift because YOU’RE pulling yourself through school in the daytime to learn how to spell. That will also explain the need for so much sugar…
Nov 17, 2011 at 4:19 am rating: 1
#43
Cormamin
This happens with my tissues all the time. No one buys me new ones, though.
Dec 12, 2011 at 9:45 am rating: 0
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