Sure, she’s dumb as a box of hair, but…

December 4th, 2011 · 49 comments

Apparently Meaghan’s roommates weren’t happy with how she disposed of her bang trimmings in the recycling bin. But c’mon, at least she didn’t leave em in the sink or the shower drain, right? Or…maybe she was confused about how the whole “locks of love” thing works? Or…aww, screw it. Can’t you bitches all just get along?

Hey bitch (Meaghan)!  Hair is not recyclable! (I hope your new haircut looks really stupid!) -N & B

related: Dear mother of hair baby…

FILED UNDER: hair · heart · Massachusetts · mean girls · recycling · roommates


49 responses so far ↓

  • #1   thrall

    At least they made it abundantly clear they’re referring to MEAGHAN. It would not do to be confused…

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:18 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

     
  • #2   Mary

    Hair might not be, but roommates sure are!

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:22 pm   rating: 25  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   Wrench

    Good lord. “Mean girls” was supposed to be a cautionary tale, not a guidebook.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:23 pm   rating: 49  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   Dizzy

    Hair, of course, is “recycleable”. Auschwitz had a booming trade in stuffed mattresses.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:30 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   Nick

      That’s more ‘reusing’ than ‘recycling,’ isn’t it?

      Dec 5, 2011 at 10:49 am   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   Anruiishi bang

    Team hair recycler* here.
    Good lord her roomate is a bitch. Although – some people have this type of relationship with their friends, thought I doubt this is the case here. Or the note wouldn’t have landed on this site.

    All else aside, the hair would have gone unnoticed by the crew that collects the recycling. I promise you they don’t check that closely. If my daughters filth-filled diapers and my roommates Wal-Mart bags full of cigarette butts can make it through no problem – then the hair doesn’t matter at all.

    * – Yes, I am aware that “recycler” is not an actual word.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:36 pm   rating: 11  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   twhit

      Recycler is a word*, so you’re good. This is according to the OED online, first noted use in 1970 though that referred to a thing, not a person. The earliest the OED lists it referring to a person is 1986.

      *As a person who considers dictionaries to be descriptive not prescriptive I would have argued it was a word whether or not it appeared in any dictionary. The purpose of language is to communicate so if you use a word and I know what you mean, I consider that an actual word that just hasn’t made it into the dictionary yet. If the dictionary prescribed what we are supposed to say, instead of describing what we do say, we’d still be calling it the welkin instead of the heavens or the sky.

      WordNerd

      Dec 4, 2011 at 9:16 pm   rating: 27  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   someone

      As someone who used to do cleaning in a university, I can tell you that when we notice something not recyclable in the recycling, we are supposed to put the whole bag in the trash. It’s not our job to sort it, so we don’t.

      Dec 4, 2011 at 9:16 pm   rating: 31  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   snarkygigi

      Actually, our recyclers go through the container at the curb. I found this out when they accidentally skipped our container one day and one of the first questions they asked me was “did you have materials in there that can’t be recycled?” When they came later that day to pick it up, I watched that guy scrutinize EVERYTHING in the bin.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 5:31 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   Olde Skewl

      I wanna play Scrabble with twhit!!!!

      Dec 13, 2011 at 9:32 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   shesajem

    I think its time for peroxide in their shampoo bottles!!

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:37 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   clever name

      Ohhh, or nair in the deep conditioner! Or I would chuck a box of powdered dye in their wash….oh! that was not powdered fabric softener? I’m so stupid…

      Dec 5, 2011 at 10:33 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #7   Karla

    This is great. Sometimes the best way to make a point is to make a rude joke out of it….sometimes.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:41 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   infant tyrone bang

    She had eaten an O Henry candy bar once, so Meaghan thought she could breeze through The Gift of the Magi without investing in the Cliffs Notes.

    The sympathetic magic angle having been a bust on the American Lit.
    final exam, Meaghan decided to dispose of her troubles by curling up with Crowley’s Diary of a Drug Fiend, a move that brought her back into the good graces of her roommates…but they still hated her new haircut.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 8:44 pm   rating: 9  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   shwo! bang

    Hair might not be recyclable, but it is a renewable resource. Although for me it’s less and less so each year.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 9:01 pm   rating: 21  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   Debkatz

    I think there are far worse things that get thrown in the recycle bin…like….room mate birth control pills…

    Dec 4, 2011 at 9:35 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

    • #10.1   aquapt

      Oh, golly no – tricking that girl into reproducing would *not* be a good thing.

      Dec 4, 2011 at 11:58 pm   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #11   AC

    Who spells Megan with a ‘H’ ?

    Dec 4, 2011 at 10:58 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

    • #11.1   Canthz_B bang

      Assholes.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 12:49 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.2   Xyzzy

      It’s an old spelling, actually… A friend of mine about 20 years ago in high school was a Mehagan, though I can’t recall if it was a family surname or the traditional spelling somewhere-or-other.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 3:35 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.3   Julie

      My parents named my sister “Meaghan” with that spelling. I think it’s beautiful, but she could never find keychains, or pencils, or anything else with her name on it when we were kids.

      I also have a student named “Maegan”.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 4:58 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.4   Nunavut Guy

      It’s the damn hippies.They started this whole spell things weird movement.

      (walks off muttering”fuckin hippies,full clip of ammo,same sex marriage bastards)

      Dec 5, 2011 at 6:23 am   rating: 9  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.5   Canthz_B bang

      Kidz theez daze!

      I have grand children, nieces and such with good names spelled in the now in fashion “unique” ways.
      Camellia or Camilla become Kameelah, Olivia becomes Aliviah…and please don’t ever let them grant me a gun license and tell me your kid has an apostrophe in his or her name (De’Andre? Ha’Keem?? really??? WTF were you thinking??? 7 or 8 months to think about it, and you settled on this crap??)

      Turns my stomach.

      Why do names which are supposed to end in ‘a’ need to end with an ‘h’? Why the double ‘e’ instead of an ‘i’?
      How do we determine whether this is creativity or sheer stupidity on exhibit? And are we allowed to say or even ask?…NO! We have to let the dopes do what they will.

      But this isn’t new I suppose. Remember when “Steven” (steeven, long ‘E’ and a ‘v’-sound) and “Stephen” (stefan, short ‘E’ and an ‘F’-sound) were pronounced differently?

      Kidz theez daze!

      Dec 5, 2011 at 6:47 am   rating: 16  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.6   RigaToni

      Funny, I just had this conversation with my son’s girlfriend. They named the child with z’s where s’s belong and y’s where i’s usually are. And when I was told the spelling I cringed visibly.

      She had a reason, but it wasn’t that great of a reason…

      Then seriously one day later we are at a souvenir store and they have personalized baby gifts and she says “Oh, wow. They will never have these for her. Oops.”

      Dec 5, 2011 at 7:34 am   rating: 13  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.7   Dee

      As one currently gestating, it has come to my attention that vowels are all being replaced by the letter y: Tryzlyn, Kyly (supposed to be pronounced “Kylie”). Let’s add some superfluous “y”s while we’re at it: Kaydynz (Cadence). Forget Aliviah, why don’t we try Allyvyah?
      I vote that people who give their children kr8tif names have “Special” branded on their forehead so we all know just how unique they are. I mean, youneek.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 8:58 pm   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.8   Meghan

      Um I do… My family does. I have never seen it spelled Meaghan though. My variation is the gaelic spelling.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.9   Jami

      People like my sister-in-law who named her daughter that.

      Dec 6, 2011 at 12:44 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.10   The Elf

      It’s not just uneek spellyngs that create the personalized keychain problem. My name is an unusual one, but an old, spelled correctly ethnic name. My husband’s name is one of those that used to be masculine but is no longer considered such. So I couldn’t find any personalized items (and as a kid I wanted one in the worst way), and all of the ones he found were pink or flowery.

      We were both in the same second grade. The teacher made nametags with little faces. The girls had bows on top of their heads and the boys had bows under their chins. My husband, the biggest boy in the grade, the one who even at age 7 looked like he ate nails for breakfast, had a little bow on top of his nametags. The kids were merciless, of course.

      I love my unusual name and the family history that goes with it, but it comes with a price. I have to spell it all the time. I have to correct pronunciation all the time. And when I got my Disney World embroidered Mouse Ears, I had to very carefully write it out for the seamstress.

      Dec 6, 2011 at 2:21 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.11   The Elf

      I looked up the name on BabyNamer – Megan and Meghan are the typical spellings. The root name is Marged, which is derived from Margaret.

      Under alternative spellings, they not only had Meaghan, but they also had Meghann (for those for whom one N is nnever enough), Megyn (it’s always wise to credit your gynecologist), Mayghan (because an AY sounds just like an E), Meggin (we spell fone-ette-ick-ly), and Meggon (as in the fierce MEG-GON THE CONQUERER). Why, Babynamer, why? Why must you encourage these trends? Isn’t “Meghan” good enough?

      Dec 6, 2011 at 2:28 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.12   Jill

      oh come on, she could easily squeeze yet another vowel in there… Meaghean?

      Dec 6, 2011 at 3:41 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.13   Canthz_B bang

      And another consonant…Meagghean.
      Ooo, how about really stressing the kid out in preschool with…Meaggheanne?

      Have I ever mentioned the time I processed a claim for a kid named “Cialis”? Inappropriate, but strangely logical choice.

      Dec 7, 2011 at 1:21 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.14   Clumber

      CB (11.13) I presume said claim was for mental anguish, resulting from that name?

      Dec 7, 2011 at 9:00 am   rating: 3  small thumbs up

       
    • #11.15   Canthz_B bang

      Clumber, I’m quite sure those claims will be filed in future years.
      Adjustment reaction with mixed emotional features will probably be the Dx. LOL

      Dec 9, 2011 at 12:21 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #12   lili

    I’m pretty obsessive about trash-sorting. My two year old can say, “wecycwing ow compope?”

    But it doesn’t matter if you throw compost in my recycling.

    I’m not going to call you a bitch.
    I’m not going to wish evil on you.
    Not even if you do it more than once.
    Not even if you do it on purpose.

    I might put out a separate trash bag if you refuse to sort, so that I can at least sort my own, and that’s not passive-aggressive, that’s assertive compromise. But even if I didn’t have time for that…

    The note writers have issues. I hope Meaghan can get a new room soon.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 11:08 pm   rating: 24  small thumbs up

    • #12.1   Tesselara

      Lili, you’re great. Thank you for being one of the few kind people on this site.

      Dec 6, 2011 at 12:36 pm   rating: 6  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.2   lili

      Aw, shucks.

      Dec 8, 2011 at 12:33 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
    • #12.3   makfan bang

      “Compope”. How perfect.

      Dec 25, 2011 at 1:45 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #13   Penultimate

    Hair recycler should toss her pubes in there next.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 11:24 pm   rating: 10  small thumbs up

    • #13.1   emcd

      “Rocket Pubes” to the rescue, no doubt.

      Dec 5, 2011 at 8:55 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #14   toadiefireball

    She should start leaving gifts of hair trimmings all over the house.

    Dec 4, 2011 at 11:53 pm   rating: 3  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Canthz_B bang

    Thankfully, hair (like room mates) is biodegradable and, if properly distributed throughout the outgoing trash, will be picked up by the Sanitation Department without any unwanted notice.

    Dec 5, 2011 at 12:53 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #15.1   Canthz_B bang

      I may have butchered that one a bit, but I didn’t want to cut and run! :-P

      Dec 5, 2011 at 1:24 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #16   Randy

    Bet that environment makes for some interesting evenings discussions around the dinner table.

    Dec 5, 2011 at 6:24 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #17   Matilda

    My return note;

    “Dear roommates,

    Prepare to find random pubes in your toothbrush, on your pillow, in your coffee cup, your hairbrush & your box of Q-Tips.

    Love, Meaghan”

    Dec 5, 2011 at 11:28 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

     
  • #18   Jami

    Dear Note Writer,

    Hair is compostible. It’s good for the garden. The proteins in hair encourages healthy plant growth.

    Sincerely,
    Gardener

    Dec 5, 2011 at 11:41 am   rating: 11  small thumbs up

     
  • #19   Quite Contrary

    Oh, ffs, if the roommates names begin with N and B, respectively, was it really necessary to a. call Meaghan out by her full name instead of simply M or even “Roomie” and b. call her a bitch on top of that? Because, really, I’m sure that Meghan would not have been able to figure out the note was addressed to her if not for the simple fact that SHE DIDN’T WRITE IT?

    Dec 5, 2011 at 4:43 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

    • #19.1   Quite Contrary

      (I apologize for the awful grammar and tenses but I can’t stand roommate communication redunancy.)

      Dec 5, 2011 at 4:44 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #20   Dr. Frank Knight

    “Fair tresses man’s imperial race ensnare,
    And beauty draws us with a single hair.”

    Alexander Pope
    The Rape of the Lock
    cto. 2, l. 27-8

    Dec 5, 2011 at 5:24 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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