23 responses so far ↓

• #1   Lukas

  Weasels don’t get presents from Santa.

  Dec 26, 2011 at 12:16 pm   rating: 8  
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• #2   jetjackson

  Santa, thisiswhyyourefat dot com

  Dec 26, 2011 at 12:42 pm   rating: 5  
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  • #2.1   The Elf

    Sadly, that website is down. It was the best food pron ever.

    Dec 27, 2011 at 6:29 am   rating: 2  
     
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• #3   gus

  How dare they tell the truth which makes mom look bad? They should be taught to lie on behalf of their mom to make her look good. “Mom wanted to make you cookies, but we told her not to because we thought you were on a diet. Sorry Santa.”

  Dec 26, 2011 at 1:14 pm   rating: 21  
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  • #3.1   t-rex

    Santa was on a Diet. Santa is the kid’s mom, and she’s on a diet. Seriously, and the reindeer are the twelve mice living under the floor boards.

    Dec 31, 2011 at 8:10 am   rating: 2  
     
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• #4   Adriana

  The 3rd stage of being too old to believe in Santa Claus: bargaining.

  Dec 26, 2011 at 1:42 pm   rating: 49  
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• #5   Who passed out the Haterade?

  The city explains so much… Tacoma is to Seattle as Jersey is to New York.

  Dec 26, 2011 at 3:57 pm   rating: 7  
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  • #5.1   Penultimate

    Have you ever experienced the Tacoma aroma? Who knew paper mills could smell so bad?

    Dec 26, 2011 at 6:21 pm   rating: 4  
     
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• #6   Erin

  I think it’s charming! I love that they’re worried he’d eat the (probably old, crusty) gingerbread house and so came up with a backup plan.

  Dec 26, 2011 at 4:03 pm   rating: 39  
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• #7   You've been Gronk'd

  They’re practicing for when they have to throw someone under the bus to their boss.

  Dec 26, 2011 at 6:58 pm   rating: 6  
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• #8   Roto13

  THIS IS THE CUTEST NOTE

  OH MY GOD

  SO CUTE

  *wheeze*

  Dec 26, 2011 at 7:55 pm   rating: 19  
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• #9   lala

  Seriously? You called your kid Griffin? Fail.

  Dec 27, 2011 at 10:31 am   rating: 15  
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  • #9.1   The Elf

    Unicorn didn’t have the same ring.

    Dec 27, 2011 at 12:19 pm   rating: 19  
     

  • #9.2   Lythande

    Why a fail? I have a friend who named her kid Gryphon. Seems perfectly valid to me.

    Of course, my real name is Lythande. Strange names are cool to me.

    Dec 28, 2011 at 8:19 am   rating: 6  
     

  • #9.3   Lady MacDuff

    ‘Scuse me? Griffin’s an awesome name.

    Dec 30, 2011 at 2:05 pm   rating: 7  
     
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• #10   Nunavut Guy

  Dear Mom;

  If we don’t get all the shit we demanded for christmas,we are calling the cops and telling them that you are running a grow-op.

  Love the kids

  Dec 27, 2011 at 10:48 am   rating: 8  
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• #11   nami

  Dear Mom,

  Santa’s not going to be happy with you.

  Love, the kids

  Dec 27, 2011 at 11:06 am   rating: 3  
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• #12   Dr. Frank Knight

  Natalie and Griffin

  Nice try with the crudités; next time, though, how about some California rolls, a little hummus with pita bread and a lightly oaked Chardonnay?

  Santa

  Dec 27, 2011 at 8:13 pm   rating: 14  
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• #13   camille

  This is so precious!

  Dec 28, 2011 at 1:42 am   rating: 5  
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• #14   The White Clouds of Opium

  Scheming is a worthwhile life skill, best learned early.

  Dec 29, 2011 at 4:32 am   rating: 5  
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• #15   Poltergeist

  Dear Santa,

  Naughty children are only naughty because their parents force them to be that way. I only acted like a screaming little shit because Daddy wouldn’t let me shave “DOODY” onto his scalp! Seriously, place the blame where it truly belongs!

  Sincerely, Little Shit

  Dec 29, 2011 at 11:28 pm   rating: 0  
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• #16   Steve

  oh, seriously…what are parents for when you are a kid trying to cover your ass BUT to throw them under the bus? Kids? shit, aren’t they always trying to finagle their way out of dealing with consequences? Like…”if we’re just are upfront about the whole cookies vs carrot thing, we can still probably get the easy bake oven, if not the pony.”

  Smart kids go for broke anyway. Love the note. Screw it, I still believe in Christmas. for Adults who haven’t let the post modern age crush their inner fun engine there is a lot of happiness to be had. Forget the crass consumerism. just break out the sleigh. If there is no snow, break out the rum.

  Dec 30, 2011 at 5:19 am   rating: 3  
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• #17   Bumblebee

  “I will always believe in you”
  CUTE. Almost brings a tear to my grinch eye.

  Dec 31, 2011 at 11:53 pm   rating: 2  
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