Writes Kristie in Tacoma, Washington: “My kids totally threw me under the bus in order to cover their tails for Santa.”
related: Dear Santa, I was wondering you whipped your reindeer.
FILED UNDER: Christmas · family · kids
Weasels don’t get presents from Santa.
Dec 26, 2011 at 12:16 pm rating: 8
Santa, thisiswhyyourefat dot com
Dec 26, 2011 at 12:42 pm rating: 5
Sadly, that website is down. It was the best food pron ever.
Dec 27, 2011 at 6:29 am rating: 2
How dare they tell the truth which makes mom look bad? They should be taught to lie on behalf of their mom to make her look good. “Mom wanted to make you cookies, but we told her not to because we thought you were on a diet. Sorry Santa.”
Dec 26, 2011 at 1:14 pm rating: 21
Santa was on a Diet. Santa is the kid’s mom, and she’s on a diet. Seriously, and the reindeer are the twelve mice living under the floor boards.
Dec 31, 2011 at 8:10 am rating: 2
The 3rd stage of being too old to believe in Santa Claus: bargaining.
Dec 26, 2011 at 1:42 pm rating: 49
Who passed out the Haterade?
The city explains so much… Tacoma is to Seattle as Jersey is to New York.
Dec 26, 2011 at 3:57 pm rating: 7
Have you ever experienced the Tacoma aroma? Who knew paper mills could smell so bad?
Dec 26, 2011 at 6:21 pm rating: 4
I think it’s charming! I love that they’re worried he’d eat the (probably old, crusty) gingerbread house and so came up with a backup plan.
Dec 26, 2011 at 4:03 pm rating: 40
You've been Gronk'd
They’re practicing for when they have to throw someone under the bus to their boss.
Dec 26, 2011 at 6:58 pm rating: 6
THIS IS THE CUTEST NOTE
OH MY GOD
Dec 26, 2011 at 7:55 pm rating: 20
Seriously? You called your kid Griffin? Fail.
Dec 27, 2011 at 10:31 am rating: 15
Unicorn didn’t have the same ring.
Dec 27, 2011 at 12:19 pm rating: 19
Why a fail? I have a friend who named her kid Gryphon. Seems perfectly valid to me.
Of course, my real name is Lythande. Strange names are cool to me.
Dec 28, 2011 at 8:19 am rating: 6
‘Scuse me? Griffin’s an awesome name.
Dec 30, 2011 at 2:05 pm rating: 7
If we don’t get all the shit we demanded for christmas,we are calling the cops and telling them that you are running a grow-op.
Love the kids
Dec 27, 2011 at 10:48 am rating: 8
Santa’s not going to be happy with you.
Love, the kids
Dec 27, 2011 at 11:06 am rating: 3
Dr. Frank Knight
Natalie and Griffin
Nice try with the crudités; next time, though, how about some California rolls, a little hummus with pita bread and a lightly oaked Chardonnay?
Dec 27, 2011 at 8:13 pm rating: 14
This is so precious!
Dec 28, 2011 at 1:42 am rating: 5
The White Clouds of Opium
Scheming is a worthwhile life skill, best learned early.
Dec 29, 2011 at 4:32 am rating: 5
Naughty children are only naughty because their parents force them to be that way. I only acted like a screaming little shit because Daddy wouldn’t let me shave “DOODY” onto his scalp! Seriously, place the blame where it truly belongs!
Sincerely, Little Shit
Dec 29, 2011 at 11:28 pm rating: 0
oh, seriously…what are parents for when you are a kid trying to cover your ass BUT to throw them under the bus? Kids? shit, aren’t they always trying to finagle their way out of dealing with consequences? Like…”if we’re just are upfront about the whole cookies vs carrot thing, we can still probably get the easy bake oven, if not the pony.”
Smart kids go for broke anyway. Love the note. Screw it, I still believe in Christmas. for Adults who haven’t let the post modern age crush their inner fun engine there is a lot of happiness to be had. Forget the crass consumerism. just break out the sleigh. If there is no snow, break out the rum.
Dec 30, 2011 at 5:19 am rating: 4
“I will always believe in you”
CUTE. Almost brings a tear to my grinch eye.
Dec 31, 2011 at 11:53 pm rating: 2
— Ed Decatur
2011: The Top Notes of the Year
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Carnivores: keep being awesome!
actually totally reasonable
a little patronizing
clip art catastrophe
flowers, trees, houseplants & gardens
landlords and property managers
Moms & Dads
more aggressive than passive
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now that's management
sex sex sex
signed with love
spelling and grammar police
thanks (but not really)
unnecessary "quotation marks"
You call that punctuation?