My friend Brooke said the doors at this New Jersey gas station were covered with notes, but this one in particular caught her attention.
(I particularly enjoyed the suggested topics of conversation. Kinda softened the tone a bit compared to this version from Toronto, no?)
related: A plea from your Boston-area barista


29 responses so far ↓
#1
B
A new topic for the gas boys: proper grammar.
Jan 29, 2012 at 7:51 pm rating: 6
#2
Quite Contrary
But where do the crackheads go when they come here? That is a very relevant question!
Jan 29, 2012 at 8:35 pm rating: 31
#3
Daffy
Don’t insult the esl folks. In Jersey English is a second language for the gtl crowd.
Jan 29, 2012 at 8:43 pm rating: 2
#4
Poltergeist
“So Jose, who do you think will win the Oscar for Actress In a Leading Role – Meryl Streep or Michelle Williams?”
“Salma Hayek.”
“But she wasn’t even nomi-”
“SALMA HAYEK!”
Jan 29, 2012 at 9:00 pm rating: 17
#5
dot
I like long walks on the beach, gerbils, the smell of fresh laundry….
Jan 29, 2012 at 9:06 pm rating: 8
#6
Dee
I’m pretty sure the answer to “Who spits in the elevator?” is the same as “Where do the crackheads go?” Obviously, they ride up in the elevator, spit in it, go down the stairwell while shaving their heads, and then go pick the good stuff out of the overstuffed garbage.
Jan 29, 2012 at 10:14 pm rating: 43
#7
careerwaitress
an addition from a new orleans reader: no, i don’t know if this particular building flooded.
Jan 29, 2012 at 10:21 pm rating: 5
#8
bookworm
The second note writer forgot “WHY DO I DIG THROUGH THE GARBAGE?”
Jan 29, 2012 at 10:43 pm rating: 16
#9
Schrute
I’d like to know what the weather’s going to be like EIGHT days from now.
Jan 29, 2012 at 11:47 pm rating: 8
#10
Don
How does he know that the thing being shaved is specifically a head, if he’s just finding random hairs or shaving paraphernalia or whatever in the stairwell? Couldn’t it just as easily be a guy shaving his face, or a chick shaving her legs, or whatever?
I can’t figure out how he’s specifically identifying it as head-shaving unless he’s witnessing it in progress, in which case he could just ask the perpetrator their identity.
Jan 30, 2012 at 1:15 am rating: 2
#11
thursdaynext
Awkward silence is always the smart choice.
Sure, you’ll feel a little weird, but at least you won’t be subjecting someone to the (apparent) torture of weather opinions.
Jan 30, 2012 at 1:36 am rating: 18
#12
The Elf
These guys sound ripe for an old fashioned politics ‘n’ religion conversation from somebody with no place particularly to be and very strongly held opinions.
He’ll be begging to talk about the weather after that.
Jan 30, 2012 at 7:33 am rating: 27
#13
Jo
A couple more suggested topics for discussion:
- Who’s that nuisance neighbour who goes around talking to all the neighbours, never giving them any space?
- Are neighbours safest kept at a distance?
Jan 30, 2012 at 8:06 am rating: 5
#14
DD
Who’s the “holier than thou” little snot who doesn’t have the gonads to talk about anything but the weather face to face, yet decided to post an anonymous passive-aggressive note on the elevator blaming it on other people?
I wanna’ talk about him!
Seriously, how hard is it to come up with a segue between how cold it is, to the crack heads seeking refuge here? It only takes a few steeps to go from “What a beautiful day” to “someone is shedding or shaving in the stairwell”. So… this guy is nosy, fine. He’s awkward, fine. Whose fault is that? Apparently his neighbors.
Jan 30, 2012 at 8:36 am rating: 22
#15
Amy in Toronto
The Toronto note author may want to discuss the way he clearly eschewed the Commonwealth spelling of the word “neighbour” with his fellow Canadians. Maybe they’re suspicious of him and his Americanized spelling, so they stick to simple conversation topics like weather so as not to rattle him psychologically.
Jan 30, 2012 at 8:43 am rating: 9
#16
Pit Pat
Wow. Bitchy.
Jan 30, 2012 at 9:40 am rating: 3
#17
Redheadwglasses
NJ is one of two states (I think Oregon is the other) that forbids drivers from pumping their own gas — there is no “self service” at gas stations there. So I imagine the gas station attendant is rather weary of the comments about the cold.
Jan 30, 2012 at 12:38 pm rating: 5
#18
Kate
HAHAHA!!!! Okay, as a delivery driver for a local hospital/pharmacy system, this cracks me up! On an average day, I will make about 20-25 deliveries and what does EVERYONE talk about? The weather. Granted, in southwest Missouri we get a LOT of weather – we get cold fronts from Canada, warm fronts from the Gulf, we had a tornado in the middle of January that destroyed my neighbor’s house, we had a June a couple years ago where it poured at least two out of three days the entire month – but seriously, EVERY PERSON I DELIVER TO wants to talk about the weather. When I go into the pharmacies, they want to know what it’s like outside. When I knock on doors, they tell me to keep warm/cool/dry. I am SO sick of talking about the weather. My iPhone will tell me almost instantly what the weather is like. I spend eight hours a day outside in it. I wish I could get this on a T-shirt.
Feb 4, 2012 at 1:27 pm rating: 2
#19
aidan
haha.lol.
Feb 9, 2012 at 12:31 pm rating: 0
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