Well, that’s terrifying.

← Debbie downed ’er The Internet is leaking. →

March 6th, 2012 · 35 comments

Though this may look like the the bloody rantings of a serial killer, Tino in Stuttgart, Germany says this was simply his flatmate’s way of stating his displeasure at the ongoing lack of parity in toilet-paper purchasing.

(Tino’s rough translation: YOU ASSES[,] BUY SOME TOILET PAPER.)

And my favorite part…

related: Comrades, take notice!

FILED UNDER: Deutsche · Germany · heart · roommates · toilet paper

35 responses so far ↓

#1 Batman

Holy. Crap.

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:21 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #1.1 The Elf
  
  That’s why he needed the toilet paper. Holy crap is the worst kind.
  
  Mar 6, 2012 at 1:54 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#2 Spooky

First I read it, then I did it.

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:23 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#3 Dee

After this, I’m requiring my next roommate to get a psych evaluation prior to move-in. Yikes.

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:25 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#4 BLA

It wipes the toilet paper (with lotion) on its skin, or else it gets the bidet again.

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:25 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#5 bookworm

Buy your own toilet paper and hide it in your room. It’s what your less-insane housemates are doing anyway.

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:26 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #5.1 Jorpho
  
  Word.
  
  You might assume that others may only be using your toilet paper gradually, or may be using their own toilet paper, or will surely be willing to contribute to a communal Toilet Paper Fund otherwise.
  
  Your housemates, on the other hand, assume the toilet paper is a free gift from the magical Toilet Paper Fairy.
  
  The optimal solution, of course, is just to move out and forget about living with housemates ever again.
  
  Mar 7, 2012 at 9:48 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#6 thrall

REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM-REDRUM

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:28 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#7 Cambrie

was that written in blood, or lipstick?

Mar 6, 2012 at 11:55 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #7.1 Dave
  
  I believe it was written after drinking five gallons of punch and a 2 pound bag of flour. I won’t say what it was written WITH.
  
  Mar 6, 2012 at 12:05 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#8 Arsch

I like the detail in the background: the green toilet seat / lid says something beginning with “Scheiss” (“shit”)

Mar 6, 2012 at 12:03 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #8.1 The Elf
  
  Ah, bachelors.
  
  Mar 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm rating: 90
- #8.2 April
  
  Hahaha, I opened the comments just to see if anyone else noticed that, lol
  
  Mar 7, 2012 at 2:44 am rating: 90
- #8.3 The Elf
  
  I wonder if the Scheiss lid is for a “shelf” or a “reverse bowl” toilet? Apparantly, it’s a German thing that puts the drain for the water in the far front and has no “slope” in the back to direct the “deposits”. It holds the feces out of the water on a shelf, presumably for a thorough inspection before flushing.
  
  This tells me more about Germany than any aspect of their history. Truly.
  
  Mar 7, 2012 at 8:45 am rating: 90
- #8.4 Libby
  
  That was my favourite part.
  
  Apr 3, 2012 at 5:24 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#9 Seanette

This is “look for new housing time” for the roomies.

Preferably before they become cold cuts.

Mar 6, 2012 at 1:26 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#10 Garrett

At least he didn’t use…other things to write on the wall.

Mar 6, 2012 at 1:43 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#11 infanttyrone

Wonder why Greeks are rioting over austerity measures ?
Needing Germans to help bail you out generates serious ambivalence.
Imagine being on the receiving end of this sort of rage on a national level.

Mar 6, 2012 at 2:10 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #11.1 berritorre
  
  The greeks are rioting because they noticed that their scam has blasted and now they’ll have to do some serious changes to get out of this sh*t.
  
  Of course they would prefer the EU (and thus Germany as one of the biggest payers) just to send the money so they can continue as they did the last few years. But I guess even the Germans have learned a few things over the years.
  
  To me that place looks like a shared flat of some “punks”. I guess they are the same everywhere, cultivating some sort of in-home anarchism.
  
  I find it quite funny and I think the whole scenery is emphasizing the case. *lol*
  
  Mar 7, 2012 at 5:57 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#12 Bethany B.

At least it wasn’t written by a woman…

Mar 6, 2012 at 4:57 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#13 wright1

Nevermind invoking Godwin, it makes sense this is from the same cultural background that produced some of the most terrifying What-Happens-To-Bad-Children-(Fairy)Tales ever.

Mar 6, 2012 at 5:16 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #13.1 Annaliesa
  
  Spieluhr by Rammstein (Speaking of Rammstein) – creepy.
  
  Mar 8, 2012 at 8:56 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#14 Tatterdemalion

We all know everything sounds more metal in German.

Mar 7, 2012 at 12:59 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #14.1 The Elf
  
  These will be the lyrics to the next Rammstein song.
  
  Mar 7, 2012 at 8:15 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#15 Grant

I’m genuinely scared.

Mar 7, 2012 at 3:38 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#16 M L

Well, there goes the security deposit.

Mar 7, 2012 at 6:18 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#17 Zorin

Let’s see, causing damage costing far more than a nice supply of toilet paper, in order to call for the purchasing of toilet paper?

This guy is deranged.

This is definitely a “move the hell out” signal.

Mar 7, 2012 at 8:36 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #17.1 berritorre
  
  *lol* They’ll have to repaint anyway, when they move out…
  
  Mar 9, 2012 at 2:24 pm rating: 90
add to this thread
#18 Frau

Toilet paper costs like 2 Euro in Germany. The cost of repainting that WC is going to be at least 20 Euro..what a shitty roommate! No pun intended.

Mar 7, 2012 at 9:39 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
- #18.1 Annaliesa
  
  I was thinking the same thing. It’s toilet paper. Who gives a shit.
  
  Mar 8, 2012 at 8:58 am rating: 90
- #18.2 The Elf
  
  He can’t give a shit! He has no toilet paper!
  
  Mar 9, 2012 at 6:37 am rating: 90
add to this thread
#19 Lily

It’s like REDRUM but in German! And with a heart. Aw.

Mar 7, 2012 at 11:08 am rating: 90

reply to this comment
#20 Brian H

Is that german for “Burn in hell Sheldon”

Mar 7, 2012 at 1:25 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#21 We shall speak Anon

There’s no Klopapier
I needed to “plop”-papier
Roomies won’t go to the “shop”-papier
Might have to make them “drop”-papier!

Mar 7, 2012 at 4:01 pm rating: 90

reply to this comment
#22 Dima

That’s way beyond the “passive” in “passive-agressive”.

Mar 8, 2012 at 7:05 am rating: 90

reply to this comment