The Countertop Snot Rocketer

April 18th, 2012 · 36 comments

Writes Brad in North Carolina: “This was in the bathroom at work, and I must have read it three or four times before admitting I didn’t have a clue what was happening.  The confusion could have been due to the grammar, the punctuation, or the notion that people blow their nose on the countertop (?!?).

Please Don't Blow your nose on Counter top here is tissue... Help your Self!!

Perhaps there’s a snot-rocketer on the loose?

Adds Brad: “In the day and a half since the note has been up, nobody has touched that roll of toilet paper.”

related: Hey, I was saving that for later!

FILED UNDER: bathroom · hygiene · North Carolina · nose-picking · office · toilet paper

36 responses so far ↓

  • #1   Patron

    I like how the last arrow plus exclamation marks make a cute bunny!

    Apr 18, 2012 at 5:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #2   shwo! bang

    There once was a young man named Lucas
    Whose counter was covered in mucus
    His colleague had issues
    With his non-use of tissues
    Or the paper that’s meant for a tuchas

    Apr 18, 2012 at 6:13 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #3   Anon E. Muss

    There once was a man from Kentucky
    Whose sneezes made everything yucky.
    Then there was a day when that man could say
    That he certainly was not lucky
    When I dragged him away in the back of my truckie.

    Apr 18, 2012 at 6:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #4   Nahhh bang

    I’ve seen people — OK, men — blow their noses like that in public, most often in the Walmart parking lot.

    None of them have ever been running at the time.

    Apr 18, 2012 at 6:37 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   shwo! bang

      Well, their noses were running…

      Apr 18, 2012 at 6:39 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.2   angie

      That’s called a “farmer’s blow” in these parts.

      Apr 18, 2012 at 8:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #4.3   Zorin

      I admit to having done that, however, only when:

      - No one is around.
      - The snot trajectory would take it into some dirt or some other surface where it will never come in contact with anyone.
      - I have no real other choice (no tissues available, etc.)

      Apr 19, 2012 at 9:28 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #5   n8urgirl

    EWWWWW!!! Just really gross and ewwwwwww!

    Seriously? Who the hell blows their nose ON the counter? I thought my ex-husband was disgusting blowing his nose in the shower (said he learned it in the service).

    Apr 18, 2012 at 8:15 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   Joe Blow

      What’s wrong with blowing your nose in the shower? Is it somehow dirtier than all of the other dirt you’re washing off?

      Apr 19, 2012 at 11:43 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.2   Wench

      Sorry guys but nose blowing in the shower actually makes sense…. the steam helps to clear the sinuses by loosening mucus (apologies to anyone who is grossed out by this, btw). Try it the next time you have a cold. It’s only gross if you don’t rinse the debris thoroughly. Definitely not dirtier than the debris coming off the average bum, anyway.

      Apr 19, 2012 at 8:58 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.3   unsatisfied

      I’m willing to bet that your ex also took leaks in the shower, too.

      Apr 20, 2012 at 11:46 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.4   The Elf

      Who doesn’t?

      Apr 20, 2012 at 12:43 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.5   Zorin

      I also snot rocket in the shower. I get some of my most thorough nose blowings that way, since I don’t have to worry about catching it in a tissue.


      n8urgirl: I bet your hubby snot rocketed onto the shower curtain or the walls, where *you* would have to clean it up? This *is* gross, and I can agree with you if this was the case!

      Apr 20, 2012 at 3:27 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #5.6   clumber

      In the shower is fair game if “shooter” just uses the nozzle thing to make sure it is washed away just like any other grossness that a proper shower removes.

      What do you mean you don’t have a separate showerhead? That’s at least 3/4 of the reason to get up in the morning!

      Apr 25, 2012 at 3:57 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #6   narcogen

    There are cities in the world where this is how everyone blows their nose, all the time. Even in public, and on the street, wearing business attire.

    Apr 18, 2012 at 8:35 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #6.1   Lil'

      There are also places in the world where people wipe their backsides with their hand. Toilet paper – it may just be the greatest invention ever made.

      Apr 19, 2012 at 10:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #7   Sarah

    I’ve tried this maneuver while running, but never fully got the hang of it…

    Apr 18, 2012 at 10:11 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.1   kermit

      Where are you running to and what important thing do you have to do that you can’t afford to stop for a few seconds to blow your nose?

      Apr 19, 2012 at 12:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.2   The Elf

      I assume they meant while running a race.

      Apr 19, 2012 at 6:21 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.3   redheadwglasses

      Even if she simply were out for a job, she likely didn’t have a tissue on her to use for blowing her nose.

      Apr 19, 2012 at 11:45 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #7.4   unsatisfied

      well, now that you have the super-helpful instructions above, your future snot-rocketry should be right on target.

      Apr 20, 2012 at 12:08 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #8   Poltergeist

    I don’t get it. Did they stand over the counter, close off one nostril, and blow into space? Why not just do it in the sink, where the evidence could easily be washed away? Common sense, people!

    If it were me, I’d find out who the culprit was, blow my nose in the provided rolls of toilet paper, and use it to TP their house.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 1:34 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

    • #8.1   The Elf

      Exactly! If it’s a bathroom countertop, that bathroom sink can’t be far away. Blow your nose there, give it (the sink definitely, the nose optionally) a good rinse, and no one is the wiser.

      Apr 19, 2012 at 6:23 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #9   Hula

    I hate it when people blow their nose that way when I’m cycling behind them. Thank god for glasses.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 4:38 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #10   Dane Zeller

    We’re to blow our nose into toilet paper? How crass. What happened to kleenex? What about a freshly laundered handkerchief? Is there no class in our world? Hand me that pen, paper and scotch tape.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 8:59 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #11   JC

    That is so disgusting I want to hurl.
    Long ago I kept hearing about snot rockets, but had never actually seen it done until years later.
    The first time I saw it, a man ON THE BUS did it onto the floor.
    I was so grossed out I actually considered getting off the bus to wait for the next one.

    Dane, sometimes when you don’t have Kleenex handy, a roll of toilet paper is your only hope. I’ve gone to bed with a roll of TP before while having a cold/sinus/allergy issue.
    At least I wasn’t blowing my nose on the sheets! :)

    Apr 19, 2012 at 9:25 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #12   RedHare

    My husband blows his nose like that in the bathroom sink all the time. But he’s disgusting and grew up in a house with no indoor plumbing or Kleenex.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 10:12 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #13   asregrttehnboerfiomewovi

    I used to work at an upscale hotel company in the tech department. Our main office was in one of the hotels. We had to share a bathroom with the “front of house” staff (waiters, housekeeping, kitchen staff, doormen etc)
    At shift change, a full 40% of the incoming workers took “sink baths” in the bathroom. Washing their hair, armpits, blowing snot rockets everwhere in the sinks and counters. It was truly disgusting. There also was the problem of boogers wiped all over the stalls, and on the walls above the urinals. There was always 2-3 inches of water on the floor from the bathing activities.
    The real kicker is, there were 2 shower stalls in the bathroom that they obviously chose not to use.
    Oh, and before you accuse me of being an elitist (those gross front of house people!) I worked in NYC, where your average union banquet waiter easily clears 6 figures, and a good doorman can do just as well.
    Money can’t buy class or manners.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 12:46 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #14   chrisinphx

    Probably the same jerk who picks his nose and wipes it on the stall wall right above the damn toilet paper roll.

    Apr 19, 2012 at 6:23 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #15   h

    Are you sure it’s snot? Just remembering another passive aggressive note from the site about “spitting” in the shower in a men’s dorm. It wasn’t spit.

    Apr 22, 2012 at 10:51 am   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #16   DurocShark

    Simpler version found at my work:

    Apr 26, 2012 at 1:02 pm   rating: 90  small thumbs up

  • #17

    How does one draw a bike that well? That’s insanely

    Sep 6, 2017 at 4:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up