Emily in Texas remembers her parents being convinced she was most uncouth child ever born — they even sent her to etiquette school to clean up her act. Well, she got a rude reminder of those days when she found this birthday card in the back of her closet.
![Dear Daughter, We wish you [a] very Happy 7th Birthday and hope you will make us proud of you by doing everything better [particularly] on your [manners]. from Mom & Dad](http://farm9.static.flickr.com/8180/8039635624_6e78d7c559.jpg "Dear Daughter, We wish you [a] very Happy 7th Birthday and hope you will make us proud of you by doing everything better [particularly] on your [manners]. from Mom & Dad")
related: Happy Valentine’s Day from Mom
67 responses so far ↓
#1
Lauren
If my English was that poor I wouldn’t be lecturing anyone about their manner.
Sep 30, 2012 at 10:59 am rating: 138
#2
havingfitz
Dear Mom and Dad:
I’ve talked with the shoddy nursing home I plan to stick you in, and they’ve assured me that my manners are impeccable!
Love
Daughter
Sep 30, 2012 at 11:06 am rating: 173
#3
HolierThanThou
If this is real, I just died a little bit inside.
Sep 30, 2012 at 11:38 am rating: 63
#4
Joey Jo Jo
I find it hard to believe how impersonal this is. “Dear Daughter?” “From Mom & Dad?” People don’t write like that when directly addressing a specific person.
Sep 30, 2012 at 11:43 am rating: 28
#5
Merri
Their English usage makes me think they’re from another country and a different culture.
Sep 30, 2012 at 11:51 am rating: 37
#6
matylda
hahaha, the handwriting isn’t very good either.
Sep 30, 2012 at 12:16 pm rating: 3
#7
mouse
I guess it takes one to know one!
Sep 30, 2012 at 3:26 pm rating: 2
#8
meri
This is like something straight out of that Tiger Mother book. Some people should not have children.
Sep 30, 2012 at 3:58 pm rating: 30
#9
Anonymous
This is sad.
Sep 30, 2012 at 4:01 pm rating: 22
#10
Jami
“Dear Mom & Dad,
I’ll be sending you my therapy bills. I hope you do better at being human beings after paying them.
Your Daughter”
Emily, I just want to give you a big hug and your parents a big old smack upside their heads. I hope that’s alright with you.
Sep 30, 2012 at 4:39 pm rating: 82
#11
missy13d69
Wow. These parents obviously took classes on how to treat a child in order to make them fail at life. The fact that the poor girl was not to drunk to post this, proves that they failed. Thank goodness.
Sep 30, 2012 at 7:54 pm rating: 24
#12
Alice
Only seven? I would have cried.
Sep 30, 2012 at 8:23 pm rating: 40
#13
Ace of Space
Oh, make no mistake about it. This was strictly from Mom. She just dragged Dad into it for backup.
Sep 30, 2012 at 10:20 pm rating: 21
#14
Poltereist
I also like the implication that there are actually more things she needs to improve upon that went unmentioned. They obviously wanted her to think. Emily probably spent the bulk of her birthday going over every aspect of her behavior, personality, and appearance to figure out what else she’s been doing wrong.
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:09 am rating: 40
#15
Who passed out the Haterade?
Is anyone else sharply reminded of the Alanis Morrissette song Perfect?
Oct 1, 2012 at 4:30 am rating: 9
#16
starspring
I would have written:
Dear Mom,
School is great. I am becoming a prostitute. Have fun wiping the drool from Dad’s chin by yourself you cold-hearted bitch.
p.s.- I won the lottery! suck it!
Oct 1, 2012 at 5:02 am rating: 14
#17
Dane Zeller
She found it in the back of her closet, huh? Maybe her parents put it there when some helpful adult told them to put the card where the sun don’t shine.
Oct 1, 2012 at 7:56 am rating: 7
#18
rubydo51
This just makes me so sad….I wonder how the relationship is between them now.
Oct 1, 2012 at 9:58 am rating: 14
#19
Trish
Dear Parents,
I’m 7. If you don’t like my manners, maybe you should have taught them to me.
Signed,
Daughter.
Oct 1, 2012 at 11:31 am rating: 64
#20
Tara
Is anyone else surprised at the formality of the actual card? I don’t think I got a card that didn’t have a cartoon character or a cat on it until I was in college.
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:04 pm rating: 26
#21
jenthehen
this could have been written by my parents. if they hadn’t grounded me from my birthday, which was done on numerous occaisions. Emily and I should be best friends and start a support group.
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:25 pm rating: 29
#22
Marky
That is the saddest thing I’ve read in quite a while!
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:27 pm rating: 7
#23
Rhea
Dear Emily,
I’m sorry your parents suck. Better luck next time.
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:27 pm rating: 19
#24
RedDelicious
Most cultures don’t understand the American way of coddling a child until they grow into completely inadequate adults.
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:42 pm rating: 15
#25
Rachel
Wow, I just want to give Emily a hug! Hopefully she has a nice life now with loving friends!!
Oct 1, 2012 at 12:50 pm rating: 9
#26
Erin
Dear Emily’s Parents:
F you.
Oct 1, 2012 at 2:00 pm rating: 17
#27
jaleo
Five words: Emily’s parents are personality disordered.
They view their daughter as an object and not a person. Welcome to our world. Kid of.
Oct 1, 2012 at 2:55 pm rating: 7
#28
Lil'
Everytime I read something like this it makes me even more grateful to have grown up in a home where my parents and grandparents enjoyed kids. We were taught to be respectful, but at the same time we were allowed to be kids. Poor Emily – this card was probably sticking out of the top of the self-help book they bought her that year…and didn’t even bother to wrap.
Oct 1, 2012 at 3:38 pm rating: 14
#29
Trit
I just wanted to say that “Dear Daughter” by itself is not offensive. My parents wrote me notes that started with “Dear Daughter” and they were not mean. I am first-generation Asian-American and my parents were just translating from their native language where it is normal to address family members by their relationship, ie “Hi cousin” or “Hello sister.”
Oct 1, 2012 at 4:06 pm rating: 22
#30
eeepah
Seeing this card has had one positive outcome– parents like me will now, having seen it, be more stalwart in their desire to be better, more loving, more patient to their kids. I expect a lot out of my “Daughter,” but expecting her not to goof up and say uncouth stuff at the age of 7 from time to time is unrealistic. Saying uncouth stuff and being gently corrected is how you become… couth? (It’s doing the red squiggly thing that indicates couth isn’t a word.)
Sounds like a case of “Hello, my name is Pot, and this is my ‘Daughter’ Kettle.”
Oct 1, 2012 at 4:14 pm rating: 13
#31
JeffSaysICant
Ah, what greater joy in the world than an instructive little birthday wish from Mom and Dad? It warms the cockles of my heart (and improves my manner, of course).
Oct 2, 2012 at 8:17 am rating: 6
#32
Lark
I actually got a card similar to this from my parents when I was little. We talked about it later after I’d grown up and they both said that it was one of the things they regretted hugely and realized was a big mistake – they’d been young parents from very strict homes and it…seemed like it would work in a ‘strict yet loving’ way at the time. It didn’t; it was incredibly hurtful and haunting, although I was too little to express how I felt. They said they could tell how bad it had made me feel but were uncertain of how to fix things. (As you can see, I have a pretty good and open relationship with my parents now.)
Anyway – parents really do those things, but it can be poor parenting rather than cruelty.
Oct 2, 2012 at 8:29 am rating: 20
#33
Brian
When I hear ettiquite school (and words like “couth”) it makes me think of people who care more about appearance than reality. Manners are important (if only to avoid hurting others feelings), but that’s not what they teach at Ms. Manner’s academy.
If you’re worried that your 7 year old is using the wrong fork on their salad…well go fork yourself.
Oct 2, 2012 at 2:16 pm rating: 12
#34
agerman
There is a German saying: Kinder erziehen ist zwecklos, sie machen den Eltern doch alles nach.
Tries to translate:
Educating children is futile, they just do like their parents.
Oct 4, 2012 at 9:04 am rating: 8
#35
bloop
Unpopular opinion, but…a lot of kids are complete sh*ts. The parents definitely sound unpleasant, but it’s very possible that little Emily was, in fact, a monstrous she-devil.
Oct 5, 2012 at 1:28 am rating: 4
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