Comment dit-on “fermez la porte SVP” en anglais?

October 1st, 2012 · 24 comments

Our submitter, who works at a language school in France,  isn’t 100% sure which one of the managers posted this on the staff board. However, there is one person he can think of who “has a fondness for long patronizing notes when a simple ‘please close the door’ would do.”

(just click the photo to enlarge)

When is a door not a door? When it's ajar!   I a door these notes.

related: Ceci n’est pas une porte

FILED UNDER: obnoxious definition · opening/closing · smartass · TL;DR


24 responses so far ↓

  • #1   joshua

    Obviously the French are willing (somewhat) to learn English, but I’m surprised that this was written in English at a language school in France. We have many schools here in the US where most people speak at least one other language, yet the sign would have been in English…

    Oct 1, 2012 at 9:18 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

    • #1.1   The Elf

      That’s total immersion! Where you’re trying to learn English, everything there should be in English to force you to master the language.

      Oct 2, 2012 at 6:14 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.2   dave

      May be he is an English teacher.

      Oct 2, 2012 at 10:37 am   rating: 2  small thumbs up

       
    • #1.3   Gwan

      It says “language school”, so I would imagine immersion school (as already noted), private language school offering tuition to adults or children outside of school hours, or possibly in the English dept of a school that teaches multiple languages (although there was only one staffroom in the public school I worked at). Also, it’s aimed at the teachers, not students.

      I also live in France and I can tell you something that complex and punny would not fly amongst most of the general population I come across…

      Oct 4, 2012 at 5:04 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #2   rngwrm

    plagiarism, didn’t cite source. F minus. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Door

    Oct 1, 2012 at 9:30 pm   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #3   shwo! bang

    Je l’adore

    Oct 1, 2012 at 9:47 pm   rating: 8  small thumbs up

     
  • #4   sarah

    The punny comments written on the bottom make this one of my favourite passive-aggressive notes.

    Oct 1, 2012 at 11:06 pm   rating: 59  small thumbs up

    • #4.1   The Elf

      Yes! I suspect the additional note writers have seen such manifestos before, and have turned them into the office joke. Humor is the best defense!

      Oct 2, 2012 at 6:17 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #5   A Stewart

    Heaven forbid you leave a French person near a chilly draft, those things are lethal. (While I can’t remember the words, there is a French affliction that translates to “having caught the air”) :P

    Oct 2, 2012 at 1:30 am   rating: 5  small thumbs up

    • #5.1   charlottefromfrance

      when you have a cold, we say : “tu as pris froid, tu as attrapé froid”… i think it’s quite the same thing as the english expression…

      Oct 2, 2012 at 3:29 am   rating: 1  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.2   bisonfish

      The Italians are the same – they can’t comprehend how the whole United Kingdom hasn’t been wiped out due to not protecting properly against drafts.

      Oct 2, 2012 at 3:49 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.3   Jessi

      And the you have my Korean grandmother who was convinced that closed doors increased the electric bill by some insane amount of money because they hindered proper circulation of air about the house.

      Oct 2, 2012 at 4:06 am   rating: 12  small thumbs up

       
    • #5.4   meri

      I can think of the words for that affliction…

      Oct 2, 2012 at 11:46 pm   rating: 0  small thumbs up

       
     
  • #6   James

    What a doorfus.

    Oct 2, 2012 at 3:28 am   rating: 10  small thumbs up

     
  • #7   TRT

    Anyone can close a door, but to open a door takes a knob.

    Oct 2, 2012 at 4:24 am   rating: 26  small thumbs up

     
  • #8   bitchy the dwarf

    depending on my proximity to said door and the amount of traffic comeing through it, I think I’d just put a sweater on, rather than have to deal with the noise of a door being open and closed constantly. But I’m not French, LOL

    Oct 2, 2012 at 5:23 am   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #9   Hula

    Ceci n’est pas un porte.

    Oct 2, 2012 at 9:40 am   rating: 7  small thumbs up

     
  • #10   mutzali

    When is a door not a door?
    When it’s an egress.
    –on the premise that “Negress” is not a racial slur, but rather an anthropological descriptive.)
    (If you disagree, then thumb me down.)

    Oct 2, 2012 at 12:41 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #11   Poltergeist

    Reading this note significantly increased my endoorphin levels.

    Oct 2, 2012 at 1:23 pm   rating: 2  small thumbs up

     
  • #12   Brian

    I have to wonder if someone hatched a plot to leave the door open. A decision of such importal should not be made lightly. Clearly they are unhinged.

    Oct 2, 2012 at 2:03 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #13   shepd

    Since it’s written for teachers:

    *us
    *a single ellipsis is plenty

    Oct 2, 2012 at 5:12 pm   rating: 4  small thumbs up

     
  • #14   Charlie

    Although the writer mentions that a door helps contain a fire and keeps out unwanted intruders, I find it very interesting that in a school, a place where safety is of the utmost importance, this administrator was more concerned about drafts.

    Oct 3, 2012 at 5:18 pm   rating: 1  small thumbs up

     
  • #15   Matt

    The note was written by one of the school employees, probably a teacher, who is clearly British and most likely a woman or a gay man. OP can confirm…

    Oct 8, 2012 at 12:34 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     
  • #16   Priapist

    Oh man, the freeway’s melting.

    Put it in the jar.

    Oct 19, 2012 at 8:10 am   rating: 0  small thumbs up

     

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